This is a NEW chapter. I had to post chapter 11 Twice. If you have not read chapter 11, please go back. Fan Fiction is being weird today, so I had to repost 11 as 12... its a mess. I am sorry if you confused with the updates. Please forgive me!
So to make up for it. I am replacing chapter 11.2 with the REAL chapter 12! Double update! Kinda sexy time, so strap in, fanticakeers!
Happy Halloween! The scariest part of this day is thinking Fan Fic is broken!
On with the show!
Sheldon:
Sheldon didn't know what to expect from their Thursday session. He had attempted self-abuse during the week as she had suggested, but his attempts were tepid at best, dare he say flaccid and disappointing. He didn't see the need to continue this schedule of self-abuse, but for some hidden Freudian reason, he wanted to if only to prove that he could.
After an encouraging call to Dr. Beverly Hofstadter, who was thrilled to discuss the subject in great detail, he understood the underlying imperative for release.
As she pushed her glasses on her face, she accentuated her point by lowering her tone and glaring into the camera, "Sheldon. I must say, this mysterious woman and your virtual relationship intrigues me. I would love to do a study on the effects of social distancing via a vis personal relationships."
"That's fascinating, but I really need to know more about chapter five."
"I'm sure you do." Her cracked smirk meant Sheldon asked the right questions. But then she said, "Your ersatz relationship with this woman means you are substituting the companionship normally associated with Leonard in order to stabilize your emotional foundations. However, intellectually, you have never been satisfied. I believe this new relationship has ignited a new section of your brain; an unstimulated, largely neglected area that you need to access. Touch that part you've ignored for too long and you truly feel satisfied."
Sheldon protested, "But I am talking about masturbation."
Beverly smirked and said, "So am I."
Leonard's mother often had insights that Sheldon had failed to consider. These self-abuse sessions should be viewed as medicinal, and just like a swallow of his favorite pink liquid when his tummy was upset, he would take his medicine.
Other than the story they had crafted to fool the New Friends Club, Sheldon had no experience with creating sexual fantasy. However, Amy had said, "role play", so he knew exactly what to research. He created a brilliant scenario that he had to admit, was quite invigorating.
The orc princess is rescued by a half High Elf half human 54 level wizard, with a double attack of meteor swarm and incendiary cloud, with a roll of 18 on the saving throw, there was no way that this campaign could not be sexy, but after 15 minutes into the explanation, Amy interrupted.
"Um, Sheldon... I hate to say this-"
"I know, the Armor class on the guards was a little low, and they would have a heavier battle ax but I think this is a realistic-"
"No Sheldon, I mean, this really isn't doing it for me. I mean, where is the romance? Where is the intimacy?"
"Well, someone failed their perception check! I'm getting to that if you let me go through the campaign, he will defeat the guards and the princess will be so thankful, she kisses him, and um... other stuff..."
"Skip to the other stuff."
"Oh, man, I had a whole battle sequence!" Sheldon whined.
"You won, go team! Now let's get to it."
Sheldon put away his detailed D&D campaign and settled back on the bed. He said, half-heartedly, "Fine. I... I mean the half-elf wizard would remove your armor."
"Okay... I remove yours as well."
He stuttered as he said, "I... kiss you."
Amy said with a low sultry voice, "And... kiss you back."
Sheldon leaned forward and said, "I move my kiss to your neck and shoulders. What do you do?"
"I arch back to let you kiss closer to my breasts."
"Hold on second." Sheldon rattled some dice in a cup and asked, "Do I need to roll a saving throw?"
"What?" Amy asked, "What's that sound?"
"My dice."
"No, you rolled a 100, keep going."
"It's an icosahedron sided die."
"A 20 then, every roll is a 20. Now go on!"
Sheldon put his dice away, and said in a huff, "Okay...seems like the Dungeon Master is going easy on the players, but okay... I ... he... continues to kiss her breasts while his... my hands are moving down your back, down your spine to your hips, curved and firm. You moan, almost growl to my touch, and the sound makes me want to explore your body, just to hear that sound again."
Amy groans into the phone. Sheldon swallowed as he felt a sensation building in him. The more he spoke, of touching, tasting her, the more the words caused a physical reaction in his body.
Amy's throaty, low voice described how she would touch him. Slow delicate and methodical. "Touch yourself now as I describe. Soft strokes, with a just a slight pressure between your index finger and thumb that strengthens as you move down the length."
Sheldon did as instructed, as she took over the story. "I move on top of you, allowing you to enter me, the sensation you are feeling tightens with each stroke. I am howling, tightening myself, touching your chest. Imagine my hands going down your skin while you feel every sensation as if it was real, as if I was on top of you, as if you are making me feel this way. Only you will ever make me feel this way. Only you will command me to climax. You are in control. My every nerve is begging, pleading to you. Sheldon make me yours. Make me say it."
Sheldon pumped his own erection feverishly. He was in control of everything, the timing, the feeling, the moans on the phone. Only one further command needed.
"Now... Amy. Climax for me. Now!"
Her tender voice crackled with orgasm, a reverberating tone that shuddered through him, connecting all his nerves to one point, one release. He drew in a breath, and then felt a cataclysmic sensation, a jolt of climax that felt like a completed circuit, a puzzle piece found, a song in perfect pitch, a domino trail following, a feeling he would never forget.
He collapsed back after his muscles released. He opened his eyes, almost forgetting she wasn't in the room with him. "That was..."
Amy's heavy breath was the only thing he could hear. "Yes it was."
"So... D&D isn't so bad, is it?"
"I'll play with you any time."
If he had had the energy, he would have bolted up with excitement as he blurted out, "Really? They have online gaming rooms that we can join! I believe-"
"I believe that I only enjoy it when you are telling the story." Amy sighed out and said in a sleepy voice, "Have any more stories to tell me... Next week?"
"I just might." Sheldon smiled.
#
Bernadette and Penny:
As Amy closed her eyes in slumber across the city, Bernadette was pouring Penny another glass of wine, her third of the night, so Penny was still pretty sober, but Bernadette was sauced. Good thing she was already home.
Bernadette was slumped in the couch, whining to Penny. She had tried calling Amy for two weeks, to no avail. "I just feel terrible! I've tried reaching out to her but she's just not answering me other than a short text thanking me for the opportunity but she is exploring other options at this time. I think it was cut and pasted it from an employment site."
"I should have used that when I was dating." Penny sipped her wine, then snapped her fingers and said with a wide smile, "I got it! Invite her to a girl's night! She can't think it's related to work if she is part of a big party, not a one on one thing."
"Great idea." Bernadette said as she sat up, albeit a bit unsteadily, and opened her computer to access the Evite website. "Who else shall we invite?"
"Well there is Raj's new fiancée."
"Which one is he on this week?"
"I think the one his mother sent, no wait, his father... not sure but doesn't matter, he has the wedding scheduled for April regardless of who it is... just send a generic invite to Raj…oh and get Velma from accounting. We can have drinks and watch a movie or something. Do you think Dr. Fowler will go for it?"
"Yeah! We'll try for next weekend, it's only a few weeks before Valentine's day, so we better book her fast. The way her phone was ringing off the hook, she might be pretty busy."
"Great! We can do it here." Penny announced.
"Why can't we do it at your place? This place is like Romper room."
Penny looked around the living room which looked like Toys R Us threw up its inventory. "Fine. But no guys! I'll kick out Leonard. Sheldon can baby sit him. He's been pretty quiet about the move. I am starting to think that he is actually upset, but refuses to say so, typical Sheldon."
"Howie will be busy with the kids. He needs the practice." Bernadette hit send on the Evite. "God, I hope she comes."
#
Amy:
Amy had finished her riveting lunchtime phone call with Sheldon about stick-toting Puffins using tools as she explained her hair routine.
"...so you see, these seabirds use sticks to groom themselves, so my use of chop sticks to hold up my hair is not so crazy."
"Agreed."
As fascinating as the topic may be, they both had work to do and as they ended the call, Sheldon wanted to reaffirm their scheduled Thursday meeting time. She confirmed the 9:00 PM appointment, and given their topic today of stick-welding, she informed him that she already had some ideas involving Harry Potter and the Very Magic Wand that she hoped he would enjoy, and his sultry, "I'm looking forward to it." Had her blushing like a school girl.
Before she closed her laptop for the day, she decided she'd open the email sent by Bernadette the night before. Amy had thought that her pointed response informing Bernadette that she was exploring other options would have put to test any further contact, however, Bernadette had still not ceased harassing her. Amy had ignored the email it all day, but she needed to put a nail in this issue once and for all.
It took her a few minutes to realize that it was an Evite to a Girl's Night. But why would Bernadette invite her to such an event given that she had only wanted to poach her for her capitalistic-based science wasteland. Was this part of a multi-level marketing scam? Maybe she was a serial killer, or worse than that, a Tupperware dealer! But the Evite did say it was going to be an evening of 'fun for a group of fun girls to have fun and do friendship things'.
Amy's mind went immediately to braiding each other's hair, trying on clothes or, according to Wikipedia, experimentation with lesbianism. "A girl's night?" she suddenly felt giddy, short of breath, her hands became clammy and she felt her heart start to race. She'd never had a panic attack before whilst alone, it had always happened when she was in a crowd. She took a deep and before she could second guess herself, she hit "accept" on the Evite and slammed her laptop shut.
During her drive home, and as she prepared and ate her dinner, Amy kept thinking of her first girl's night. She was curled up in bed with her laptop researching entertaining topics of conversation, and suitable 'comfortable clothing' as specified by the invitation, when she heard a text alert on her phone, then another, and then a third.
"Amy?"
"Amy?"
"Amy?"
It was 9:20 and she had missed their 9:00 PM call. Amy called him back. "Hello Sheldon. Please forgive my tardiness."
"Amy... thank goodness." Sheldon sounded out of breath and quite distraught. "I was about to send out police to look for... Well... I guess a woman who is interested in harp music and Neil Diamond."
"That's half of California, Sheldon." Amy chuckled. "Forgive me... I just became absorbed in a fascinating web site." Amy closed her laptop after she book marked the sale at Target on sweat pants. "How are you?"
"Well, I must say, not well. I am very concerned over this virus ravaging through China and now I hear it's on Cruise ships. We should start to stock up on essentials."
"A wise move." Amy opened her lap top again and went to the toilet paper section of the web site. "I'm getting hand sanitizer and I recommend you do as well."
#
The following evening Amy arrived at 2311 North Los Robles Ave by Uber just in case the party got "too crazy". The elevator was out of commission so she started up the stairs to the 4th floor. She was about to knock on 4A, and then double checking the invitation on her phone. She knocked on 4B.
A fetching blonde woman answered the door that Amy recognized as the other woman from the conference. "Oh, right on time I see." She tapped her watch, and then with a sweeping motion welcomed Amy into the apartment. "Come in! Would you like a glass of wine?"
"Oh, peer pressure based social drinking that mother warned me about. Color me intrigued." Amy entered the apartment eager for a night of estrogen-based fun filled activities.
#
Penny closed the door just as Sheldon opened his, to check on the mysterious voice outside his apartment.
"Now I'm hearing that woman everywhere! The Vixen." Sheldon turned back into the apartment. He had wanted to spend some time crafting a new story for his next session with Amy on Thursday as he sorted his laundry. Unfortunately, his soon to be ex-roommate had derailed that particular train.
"Leonard, I don't know why you're over here tonight disrupting my new schedule just so Penny can have a hen party! Today is Saturday, Leonard. Saturday! Laundry night." Sheldon really just wanted Leonard to leave so he could get his Laundry done, and spend more time googling interesting positions to try and top Amy's latest fantasy.
Leonard ignored his outburst saying "Come on Sheldon, we have been putting off splitting this stuff up for a while. We move in less than a month! February is a short month at that!"
Sheldon didn't need any reminding of the calendar. He knew Leonard was scheduled to move out in 29 days.
Leonard walked to the wall near the door and pointed at an item, "Now, who gets the Game of Thrones sword?"
"You can have it."
"Really?" Leonard asked surprised, as he took the sword off the wall.
"Sure, and the action figures and the game systems. As soon as you pay me for my half since these were purchased with the intent of being displayed in a "mutually agreed upon location." Sheldon handed Leonard the signed roommate agreement and pointed out the appropriate paragraph.
"That was when we lived together. This is void since we aren't really roommates anymore."
"Sorry. You signed the agreement concerning decorations in this apartment. If you want them, you have to pay for the other half of them." Sheldon handed him a detailed spreadsheet accounting for all the items in the apartment that they had purchased together.
Leonard's eyes widened upon seeing an amount that was larger than his down payment. "I can't pay this! I'm buying a house!"
"I'll be reasonable...you can do a payment plan!" Sheldon took his spreadsheet back and said, "Or...you can visit them in my new collectables room. By the way, I have kept your bed in place in case things don't work out... You know how things go." Sheldon gave Leonard a shrug and a sympathetic smile.
Leonard shook his head as if he had expected such a response. He sat in the beige chair and rubbed his eyes before he said in a calm voice, "Sheldon, buddy. I think you're deflecting your anger about my leaving onto my relationship with Penny, and..." Leonard looked over at the new cat scratching post placed behind the couch. "...and I don't think getting a bunch of cats is a good idea."
"You may have your mother's genes, but don't think for a second that her superior knowledge passed through her DNA to you. I am fine. I am not upset about the change. Things are good. I have a new routine that is suiting me rather well. Also, don't think about touching that Cat Woman scratching post."
"When did you get all this new stuff?" Leonard tilted his head and asked Sheldon with a concerned tone as he eyed a new D&D figure set, "What do you need this for? You canceled D&D on Thursdays."
"Stuff... Personal stuff and leave it at that. Now, we do need to go through the books. I recommend you take the ones your mother wrote; you need a refresher course on her wisdom."
"You can keep those!" Leonard picked up the Harry Potter wand on the cabinet, but Sheldon let out a screech.
"No! You can't take that!"
"But it's mine! I bought it at Harry Potter World with Howard!"
"No, that's mine. I ordered it this week..."
"Fine... I don't know why you didn't just go with us when we invited you!"
"I heard the rides are scary." Sheldon took his prized wand to his room.
Across the hall...
Amy finished her discourse, "... but please excuse my expostulation on the dexterous benefits of dental floss knitting as they related vis-a-vis to female masturbation techniques." Amy smiled at the group of women all hanging on her every word.
Penny turned to Bernadette and whispered, "I only got half of that."
"I took notes." Raj's fiancée, Misha, winked at them and turned to Amy. "So, tell me, Amy. How did you learn such a... um... rigorous method?"
"I'm self-taught." Amy shifted uncomfortably on a chair that looked like it might have been found outside in a dumpster. She referred back to her list of socially acceptable banter that she had referenced for the evening. "That's number seven on the list."
Bernadette joked, "Um... do you have other helpful techniques on that list?"
Amy shook her head, 'No, but if you have a banana, I can show you another technique I learned was quite effective for fellatio. If you imagine the banana is a magic wand-"
Penny interrupted, "So, ladies! More wine?"
Bernadette lifted her glass for Penny to refill. She leaned over and asked Amy, "So tell us, Amy...who was the person who kept calling you when we were at dinner?"
Penny perked up, and said, "YES! What's the dirt! Who are you dating?"
Amy shrugged and answered flatly, "No one. I only date once a year to appease my mother. Which reminds me, I need to schedule something soon." Amy pulled out her phone and set a calendar alert for a month to "Get a Date." she returned to the conversation since all eyes were upon her. She smiled and sipped her water glass. She had decided not to indulge in alcohol for her first girl's night, though the Kahlua on ice cream looked inviting.
"No one? No wonder you're so good at that um...that knitting thing..." The girl on her left, Velma, looked sympathetically at Amy and grabbed another cookie from the tray in front of her. She said to the group, "I work in accounting, and I thought that was a lonely field."
"Oh, I'm not lonely." Amy smiled at the group, "I'm just not interested in investing time in a romantic relationship based on current socially acceptable paradigms."
"Don't you want someone to snuggle up to at night?" Misha suggested.
"Hold you when you're sad?" Velma spoke as if an authority.
"Or just be there when you have a great day?" Bernadette offered.
Penny said, "Or buy you a car when yours craps out."
Amy suddenly felt like a misfit, all of the women had someone, a significant other. She put forward her case, "Well, I don't want to compromise my time for another and... my car runs fine."
Penny slumped into her chair and said, "Well, you do have to compromise a lot. Also, your career choices are tied to the other person for the rest of your life! I mean the pressure to have kids! It's just too much! You give up a part of yourself every day; you become someone you never thought you'd see. Can you even say that you're the same person you were when you met him? I mean, am I right?" Penny looked around the room for confirmation; Misha slugged back her entire glass of wine in one go, the girl from accounting looked less than happy, but Bernadette just shrugged.
"I don't know, me and Howie are great. I didn't change for him at all."
Penny said, "Well, I have to admit that Leonard has also changed for me. I guess that that is what love is. You change for the other person."
"But if you change for the other person, doesn't that mean you were only in love with the person you wanted them to be, not the person they are?" Misha asked.
Amy thought for a moment before she spoke. She said, "I think if you love the person, you would never ask them to change. I have someone... someone very special to me, and I would never ask him to change. I know he will never want to be with me. I could manipulate him. I have a fascinating experiment based on Ebbinghaus' work that I could use. I could make it so he loved me but I accept him for who he is. I compromise for him out of my feelings for him, but I don't expect him to do it for me."
"Sounds like you love him a lot." Bernadette said, with a hint of sadness in her voice.
Amy sighed and said, "I think I'll take that ice cream now."
About two hours later, Sheldon shot off a quick text to Amy as he finished the last of his laundry folding for the night.
"I hope you had a pleasant evening. I had a grueling evening with Wheezy, however, I did work out a payment plan for a portion of the collectibles. I hate to admit that I compromised on the price for the Mr. Spock cuckoo clock."
As Sheldon rounded the corner from the laundry room, his basket in hand, he caught a glimpse of a woman leaving the apartment building. Her ample bottom swayed as she pushed the door open and sauntered down the road to enter a car hire. Sheldon couldn't take his eyes off her long brown hair or her bottom as she bent over to enter the car and his inattention caused him to drop his clean laundry on the floor.
He looked up just as the car drove away and his phone alerted him to a text from Amy.
"I had an interesting evening, though I am a little light headed... Too much ice cream." Amy sent a final text for the evening, "I'm glad you worked out things with Wheezy... Compromise is a sign of love."
Again, I hate to beg for reviews to see if the site is still acting up, but if you could just leave a quick, "I read the real chapter 12" That would be so great. Fan fic fubared my chapter 11. I hope you liked the REAL chapter 12!
Have a safe Halloween everyone!