Three Hundred and Fifty Eight
Another day dawns. Madara detaches himself from Tachibana and rolls out of bed. The thought that it is probably inappropriate for him to share a bed with the boy crosses Madara's mind. He'll have to teach the boy to sleep in his own room. Ajisai is still asleep. Glad to have a few minutes to himself before the kids wake up, Madara heads to the bathroom, where he left his new clothes to dry overnight. Madara discovered the previous day that he cannot stand the smell of new clothing.
His clone apparently disguised himself as a nondescript civilian and went to town buying everything he could with the money Madara gave him. The clone got Madara a Yukata to sleep in, a haori hakama for casual wear and the most absurd outfit Madara has even seen for his new shinobi garb. Why Madara still lets his clone do anything is beyond him. His clone always does something dumb.
Madara gathers the clothes up, sticks the clothes he was resurrected in into the washing machine along with Tchibana and Ajisai's dirty clothes from the previous days, takes a shower and puts on his shinobi gear. It all looks very stupid, but his clone assured him it looks way better on than it does off. The clone was napping when Madara got home the day before, so perhaps his brain was addled from sleep. He was certainly groggy enough to have failed to retain all the memories of the fateful shopping trip.
The chainmail shirt is sensible, Madara thinks as he slips it on. The sleeves cover his arms completely. Where did the clone find it? Most of these things only go to the elbows at most. His pants are not the best for camouflage, what with the red stripe that runs down the outside of each leg. They are black, like the vest that Madara is very sceptical of. But, clone or not, Madara trusts his own judgement, so he puts on both pants and vest. Next on is a leather jacket in the same shade of red as his old armour. Madara wonders if his clone saw the jacket and chose the rest of the outfit to match it. Well, he still looks kinda dumb, so Madara puts on his new boots to see if that will make him look more badass and less simpy.
Where in Kaguya's name did his clone find these things? Not only do they have closed toes, they also come up to his knees and the laces are the same red as his jacket. Maybe they came with the jacket? If only his clone actually remembered the trip, but somehow he blocked out the horror of it, leaving Madara to question his own judgement. However, the jacket already has the Uchiha crest sewn like a gang patch on the back, so Madara feels as though he must wear this silly outfit. Madara checks his reflection now that he has the whole outfit on. Hopefully he doesn't look stupid. He feels stupid.
"...oh. That's why he went with this outfit," mutters Madara, realizing that he looks like he is about to rob a bank then burn down a government building. "I look like a criminal. ...and it's cool, I guess."
Thud. "Ow!" That'll be Tachibana falling out of bed. Madara takes his shoes off again and heads to his room to attend to his foster kids.
Tachibana is sitting on the floor rubbing his head.
"You need to start sleeping in your own room," says Madara, crouching down to make sure the boy didn't hurt himself too badly. It is just a bruise.
"Why?" asks Tachibana, pouting. "I don't like sleeping by myself."
In her crib, Ajisai squeeks in agreement.
"It is inappropriate for us to share a bed," says Madara. "You need to learn to sleep alone."
"How is it inappropriate?" asks Tachibana, genuinely confused.
Madara sighs. Of course Tachibana doesn't know about gay pedophiles. The Order of Joe had sex specifically to create babies, after all. "There are men who like to do the things the Order of Joe got up to, but with little boys around your age. So if you sleep in my bed, they will think I am one of those men."
Tachibana stares up at Madara, his mouth hanging open. "But I trust you."
"You and literally no one else, kid," says Madara, tousling the boy's hair. "Let's get ready for school."
The fallen Guard is laid to rest alongside his forefathers. They seal his tomb as the sun rises and watch as the first rays of morning sunlight light up the newest addition to the cemetery. Finally, they all leave. Kurama asks Naruto to stay a little bit longer and together they go through the graves, reading the names of all the Guards the Kurama never met.
"Some of them died searching for Kurama, you know," says Sei, coming up behind Naruto, as he stares at one of the graves. "During the wars, the shinobi villages would not allow the Bijuu Guards near them. They were afraid we would steal their new super weapons. We would have, but unlike many other groups targeting the bijuu, we would not have killed the jinchuuriki."
Ask him if he knew the man lying in this grave, Kurama tells Naruto.
"Did you know this man?" asks Naruto, pointing to the sealed up tomb in front of them.
"He was my Uncle," says Sei. "He was also my mentor. He taught me everything I know and entrusted me with the task of passing on what I know to the next generation just in case they would be the ones who find Kurama. But I found him. Uncle would have been so proud and happy."
If he was any more boring he would be a civilian, says Kurama. He is the plainest walking-cliche I ever had the pleasure to meet.
"Kurama likes how boring and cliche your life is," says Naruto.
"Um...thanks, I guess?" says Sei, raising one plain eyebrow.
When Madara wakes up with Tachibana cuddling him the morning after he explained why the kid should not sleep in his bed, he decides to ask for help. While he drags himself and his foster brats to the Academy for another day of helping Iruka train about 30 brats, Madara sends his clone to Kazama and Arashi's house to take Arashi up on his offer of help.
When Madara's clone arrives, Arashi lets him in and directs him to the living room to talk to Kazama. Arashi himself is in the middle of some research and can't talk right now. Madara heads to the living room, passing framed photos of the family that lives in that house. The clone feels a twinge of sadness. He has no pictures of his dead brothers, only fading memories.
Kazama is sitting in her big armchair, with a young cat on her lap. Madara cannot tell what the woman is knitting, but it looks colourful. "Hello, Madara," says Kazama. "Have a seat."
Madara sits down and says cautiously, "I didn't see that cat last time I was here."
"He hides when there are too many extra people around," says Kazama, pausing her knitting to pet the cat. "He is from the same litter as Sasuke's cat."
"Oh, I see," says Madara, awkwardly.
"Go make yourself a cup of tea," says Kazama. "Then tell me what's on your mind. You know where the kitchen is."
Madara's clone gets up and heads to the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea. When he returns, Kazama has switched colours. Madara still cannot tell what she is knitting. Tentatively, Madara sits down again with his cup of tea.
"What can I do for you?" asks Kazama, her knitting needles clicking.
"It's about Tachibana," says Madara. "The oldest of those kids Iruka is dumping on my hands."
"Oh yes, what's the problem?" Kazama asks, not at all surprised.
"He won't sleep in his own bed," says Madara, angrily taking a sip of his tea. "I keep waking up with him cuddling me, so I take him back to his bed tell him to stay there, and when I wake up a few hours later he is back. Short of locking him in his room, I don't know what to do."
Kazama finishes her row, changes her needles over and asks, "Are there any other issues you are having?"
"Yes," says Madara's clone, seizing the chance to vent. "The baby cries if I leave her alone for five bloody seconds, the boy keeps walking into things and falling over and I don't know how I am going to handle him when the other three kids are dumped on me. It's bad enough that I have to get up in the middle of the night to feed the baby without having to put the boy back to bed every single time. I don't mind having the baby in my room because she's a baby and she stays in her bed, but the boy is 12! He can't be sleeping in my bed - it's inappropriate! But no, he doesn't like sleeping by himself." Madara drinks another angry mouthful of tea. "And it's all your brat's fault."
Click, click, go Kazama knitting needles. There is something soothing about that sound. It reminds Madara of his mother, and he begins to feel much calmer.
Madara drinks his tea and waits for Kazama to answer. She is thinking hard.
Finally, Kazama says, "The baby will calm down as she gets older. Very young babies are often clingy. As for the boy...he is the blind one, isn't he?"
"Yes, he is the blind one."
"Get him a guide dog," says Kazama. "The dog will be good company for him at night, provided he is not allergic - although I don't imagine he will be. Uzumakis are notoriously hardy after all. A guide dog will solve your problem of him tripping over things and, if you get him a ninja hound as a guide dog, it will be able to fight and train alongside him as well."
Madara can see the sense in that logic. "I had better pay a visit to the Inuzuka clan after this, then," he sighs. Madara stays a while longer to finish his cup of tea. Then he thanks Kazama for her help and heads around to the Inuzuka Clan compound.
When he arrives he is instantly confronted by the clan head. What was her name? Tsume. "What do you want, Madara?" Tsume demands.
"Knowing what the Leaf is like, I imagine that you already know Iruka's making me look after a bunch of kids?"
"Yes," says Tsume. The two dogs on either side of her growl, their hackles raised menacingly. "Why are you here?"
"The oldest one is blind," says Madara. "I need to get him a guide dog that can also serve as a ninja hound, because he wants to be a shinobi."
"What is a blind kid too much for you?" scoffs Tsume. "Can't you deal with it for the year?"
"I could," says Madara, being as blunt as possible. "Of course I could deal with it, but there are five kids and each one is needier than the last. I need someone trustworthy to keep the blind kid from falling off a cliff or something. Kazama advised me to get him a dog."
"Oh, so it's Kazama's idea," Tsume says, rolling her eyes. "You'll have to bring the kid here. Ninja hounds choose their own partners."