Kushina arrives at the indoor training hall at about 2:30pm. Her group of trainees must be getting very hungry by now. Naruto is sitting on the observation platform, watching the five female candidates. Kushina heads over to Naruto and asks, "How are they doing?"
"They all decided that skipping lunch will be good for their figures and started doing their makeup and braiding their hair, dattebayo," says Naruto, rolling his eyes.
"Of course they did, dattebane," says Kushina, rolling her eyes. Then she notices something. "Did they all bring their handbags?"
"All except that girl," says Naruto, pointing to the one braiding her hair into a fish-tail braid. "She has a backpack."
"Can I fail them all right now?" sighs Kushina.
"Aw, come on, give them a chance," says Naruto. "This will be really funny, and me and Kurama are boooored, 'tebayo." He pauses for a second and then says, "Sorry, Kurama and I. He told me off."
Kushina does not know what to make of that. When she and Minato sealed the Nine Tails into Naruto, the last thing they expected the fox to do was parent their kid. "Better get this over with, then," says Kushina, and drops down into the training arena.
The girls, who are all sitting cross-legged on the floor, look up at Kushina.
"You took so long, I applied three coats to my nails," says one girl. Kushina decides to call her Nail Polish. It's no use learning their names unless they pass the test.
Another girl is applying mascara. "Hang on, I just need to get these last few lashes…" says Mascara girl.
Backpack girl ties off her braid with a fluffy scrunchie and gets up, puts on her back pack and tries to make a serious face. She just ends up looking like a little kid trying to be tough.
The fourth girl is braiding ribbons into the fifth girl's hair. From the looks of things, Ribbons girl already helped the fourth girl do her hair up in a fancy bun.
Kushina crosses her arms and waits for Mascara, Nail Polish, Ribbons and Bun to finish their makeovers and stand up. Kushina regards the five girls, the last of her hope dissolving away. They seem to be friends, so maybe they will pass the teamwork part of the test. "Alright girls, listen up!" says Kushina, glaring down the candidates. "The test I am giving you is not one of the normal tests you trained and studied for. This test is called the Bell Test." Kushina hold up her bell. "Your task is to take this bell from me, and keep me from getting it back until the clock on the wall strikes five. If you tamper with the clock in any way, you will be instantly disqualified." Kushina ties the bell to her belt and says, "Let's begin, 'tebane!"
All five girls attack Kushina at once. Kushina leaps into the air, and all the girls run into each other. Kushina lands beside the pile of handbags. "Put these to the side!" she orders. "You don't need them."
"But what if break a nail and need to file it?" says Bun.
"What if my hair comes undone and I need a comb?" says Nail Polish.
"What if I need to touch up my lipstick?" says Ribbons.
"What if I need to change my shoes or something?" says Mascara.
"Tough." Kushina crosses her arms. These girls are all stupid. She turns to Backpack. "And you! What's the point of that bag?"
"I keep my weapons in it," says Backpack. "And snacks, and a book and a pen and paper, and anything else I might need."
"Have you ever heard of fuuinjutsu?" asks Kushina, sighing. Then she picks up the handbags and throws them up onto the viewing platform. "There, now we can fight with no distractions."
"HOW DARE YOU!" Four of five girls are enraged, and attack Kushina. Somehow, they manage to push Backpack face-first into the floor on the way past. Kushina easily fends them off with taijutsu alone. Meanwhile, Backpack is taking off her backpack and fiddling with the zipper, which is stuck.
This is going to be a long test.
Madara sighs. Tachibana tripped over a rock and is lying face down in the dirt outside the Inuzuka compound. School finally finished, so Madara is taking Tachibana to see Tsume, as arranged by his clone. Ajisai is sleeping peacefully in her sling.
Tachibana gets up and grabs Madara's hand. "Why are we here?" he asks.
"To get you a dog," says Madara.
"What's a dog?" asks Tachibana.
The doors of the Inuzuka Compound fly open and reveal Tsume alongside her massive hounds. "What's this? You don't know what a dog is?"
Tachibana hides behind Madara. "...Scary…"
"She's scary?" says Madara, taken aback. He thought Tachibana wasn't scared of anyone. He is an Uzumaki, after all.
"No," says Tachibana, shaking his head against Madara's back. "Those." He points to the hounds. "They have scary chakra."
"Calm down, boys," says Tsume, petting her hounds. "You're scaring the pup."
The hounds calm their raised hackles and stop growling at Madara. Then they sit down, wag their tails and pant, letting their tongues hang out the sides of their mouths.
Madara pulls Tachibana out from behind him. "Come on, you know the rules. Stay where I can see you."
"Yes, Uncle Madara," says Tachibana, clinging to Madara nervously.
"These boys won't hurt you," says Tsume. "They only tear apart their enemies."
"Oh, I see," says Tachibana, calming down.
"No you don't," says Tsume. "Isn't that why you need a guide dog? Follow me."
"I don't get it," says Tachibana.
"Don't worry about it," says Madara and, leading Tachibana along behind him, he follows Tsume to the kennels.
"Found some younger dogs," says Tsume. "These are all trained, or can easily be trained as guard dogs. All have begun training as ninja hounds. Go on, boy. Find your dog. And don't worry, the right dog will find you."
Madara lets go of Tachibana's hand and gently pushes him forward into the kennel. Once the boy is inside, Tsume shuts the gate behind him and pulls a lever to open the individual compartments the puppies are in.
The puppies tumble out, tripping over themselves and each other. They bark happily and start to chase each other. A few of them sniff around Tachibana, but mostly they ignore him. Tachibana sits down just inside the gate, a hopeless expression on his face. "I can't do this," he whispers.
"Sure you can," says Tsume. "Just wait a bit and one will come over to you."
So they wait, and not one puppy shows interest in Tachibana. Eventually, a group of puppies, in search of a new toy, run over to Tachibana, yapping all the way. Tachibana hears them coming and climbs over the gate faster than he has ever moved before. The next moment, he is hiding behind Madara.
"Well This isn't going anywhere," says Tsume, crossing her arms. "Of all things, the kid had to be scared of dogs."
Madara feels a disturbance. Something is not right. It's almost as if...As if someone has been playing around with fuuinjutsu. A roar splits the air. Sounds like thunderclaps follow the roar, and a minute later, a brilliant red dragon twice the size of a horse flies overhead. It circles twice and takes a deep breath.
Seeing it's chest begin to glow, Madara starts weaving hand signs. As the dragon releases a torrent of fire down on the Inuzuka compound, Madara meets it with his own fire. If this dragon wants to test its mettle against Madara Uchiha, he will happily oblige. Ajisai wakes up and starts to cry.
Madara takes off the sling and hangs the sling around Tachibana's shoulders. "Hold your sister," he says. "I have to fight a dragon."
"Really," says Tsume, crossing her arms. "You could let me handle it."
"Go back to the kitchen, woman," says Madara, dismissively. "I find myself in need of a summoning animal."
Tsume stiffens. "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?"
Madara turns his rinnegan on and glares at the woman. "I said, 'Go back to the kitchen.' Pay attention."
The dragon circles in for another attack, this time it swoops down and snaps its jaws at Madara. Madara grabs it by the teeth and flips it onto its back. Tsume swings a punch at Madara. Madara dodges and glares at the woman. "You might be able to scare your husband, but I am not so easily intimidated."
Tsume pouts and crosses her arms. "Who told you my husband ran off because he was scared of me?"
"You did, just now," says Madara, and turns his attention back to the dragon.
The dragon swings its tail. The tail swings towards Tachibana and Ajisai. A moment later, one of the puppies leaps over the guard rail and bites the dragon's tail. The puppy lands on the ground, sinking its teeth into the dragon's tail and growling.
The dragon howls in pain and lashes out at Madara, who still has it by the teeth. Madara sighs. This spectacle is getting boring. "Alright dragon," says Madara. "We will release you if you make a summoning contract with me and do my bidding!"
Fear in its green eyes, the dragon nods.
"Good," says Madara, and makes the summoning contract using blood from the puppy's bite. The puppy refuses to let go until the contract is signed and the dragon has vanished to the summoning realm.
A moment after the dragon vanishes, Iruka and some girl with buns in her hair run up with panicked expression on their faces. "Where did it go?" demands Iruka.
"I made a summoning contract with it," says Madara, taking Ajisai back and slinging her over his shoulders again. "There, there. Shut up." Madara soothes the baby.
Ajisai sticks her thumb in her mouth and stops crying.
"I am so sorry!" says the girl with buns in her hair. "I was practicing fuuinjutsu, and a dragon appeared!"
"Who are you?" says Madara, raising an eyebrow.
"Oh, I'm Tenten," she says, smiling. "I'm Iruka shishio's apprentice."
"She's Lord Second's Great Granddaughter," says Iruka.
"I see," says Madara, frowning. "Why weren't you training her in a controlled environment? This isn't the Hidden Whirlpool, where the entire village was a controlled environment. This is the Leaf, where the entire village is full of pansies!"
"Uncle Madara?" says Tachibana. "I think I've found my dog."
Madara looks over to see that Tachibana has his arms around the puppy that bit the dragon's tail. The puppy is licking Tachibana's face and wagging her tail. "Good, then we can leave. Woman, send the bill to the Hokage."