And if you have a minute, why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go somewhere only we know?

-Somewhere Only We Know, Keane

Claire spotted Andrew and Allison on the front steps immediately when she parked her car and she and Annabelle got out (the two girls had decided, since spending so much time together just the two of them, to take turns carpooling to school together.) Though she was in the worst mood she'd been in all year, it made her smile just to see the two of them together. She knew that Andy had been feeling pretty alone in the world lately, and she was thankful that he now had Allison. This week had been the first time she'd seen him smile since pretty much the first day of school.

Claire smiled and waved at them (Andrew was so busy staring at Allison, watching her draw, that he almost didn't even notice Claire) as she walked behind Annabelle up the steps to take their place at the very top near the entrance to the school. It had always been the spot where the popular kids hung out before class. Claire was pretty sure that the spot had been chosen so that they could sit all high and mighty, looking down on the other kids like some kind of royalty. It had seemed fitting to her before, but it now seemed so stupid, trivial, and ridiculously arrogant.

Claire realized that she no longer wanted any part of it. It had turned her into someone she didn't even like anymore. And as she looked down below to where Andy and Allison were, looking like two happy, lovesick puppies she realized it had probably already cost her too much. It had cost her the first boy she ever really cared about.

She had to get out of there. She couldn't listen to Dan talk about stupid game plays, Charlotte flirting with the new team captain, Erica passing judgment on all the kids sitting below them, or Brock planning the group's next big night out. She needed to be around people who actual understood her; people who could make her feel better about herself, because she'd been feeling pretty crappy about herself ever since yesterday.

So without thinking, Claire said goodbye to Annabelle, got up, and walked down the steps. She didn't think she was exaggerating that all eyes were on her as she made her way down the stairs toward Andrew and Allison. Except for Ferris and his two friends, or the jocks going to Brian's group for help with homework, the popular kids never descended the stairs to talk to other people; the same way those who weren't in Benny's or Erica's or Steff's or Stubbie's groups didn't dare go up the stairs until the 10 minute warning bell for homeroom. But Claire didn't care. She didn't even hesitate at the thought of how her friends would react when they confronted her later.

Because none of that could make her feel as bad as knowing that by now Bender, and most likely Brian, too, probably hated her. Maybe even Allison and Andy had heard by now.

She tried to hide her nervousness as she sat down to feel the situation out. "Hi," she said gingerly.

"Hey, Claire. Are you okay?" Allison greeted. Leave it to her and her sensitive nature to pick up on the emotions Claire was trying so hard to hide.

Okay, Claire thought, so the boys haven't told her yet. She was pretty sure that even if Saidie hadn't ratted her out to Brian after exposing her to Bender, Bender had immediately gone to Brian himself with the sordid details. At least she still had Andy and Allison—until Brian and Bender finally got to them.

"Um, yeah. I'm fine. What's up with you guys? Andy, how is…well, everything?"

Andrew gave her a half-smile and kind of chuckled. "The same, basically. My dad is getting angrier and angrier every day that goes by that he hasn't been working. And of course since I quit he's taking all his frustration out on me."

"That bites. I'm sorry," Claire said, truly sympathetic.

"It's okay. Let's just say I spend a lot of afternoons at Johnson's house." Andy laughed. Allison smiled at that.

That brought Claire to her question. "Have you guys seen Bender or Brian this morning?"

Neither had seen them. "Bender's probably just now waking up, and Johnson told me he was getting a ride from his dad this morning because he had to bring in some stuff for a school project. I offered to drive him, but I don't think his mom likes him being friends with someone who isn't… you know, a brainiac, too much." Andrew said.

Claire was relieved that she'd have to wait awhile before facing the music with Bender. She wasn't looking forward to being dumped at all. But there was another part of her that kind of just wanted to get it all over with. She certainly didn't need to be stressing about it all day.

To take her mind off of it, she focused on watching Allison's latest work of art in progress. She was surprised to see it was a sketch of her in the set of her mother's pearls that she'd worn on the first day of school. Claire never wore them except on the first day and on very special occasions, like her parents' business dinners or social club dinners, and when Cooper and his wife came over.

It was beautiful. Claire had always envied Allison and her natural talent. She'd have to ask Alli if she could have the sketch when it was done. If she's even still speaking to me by then, Claire thought.

Finally the bell rang. As the group got up to go inside, Andrew said to Allison, "So, I'll call you tonight and we can discuss plans?"

Allison nodded. Andrew kissed her cheek and walked off.

The girls headed inside together and Claire asked, "Plans? What plans?"

Allison was so busy shifting around and looking about uncomfortably, that Claire was surprised Allison heard her. "He wants me to go with him to some Halloween party one of his brothers has every year."

"Halloween? Oh my gosh, is it already that time of year? I guess I hadn't even realized."

"Um, Claire? Your friends are staring." Allison said, almost accusing.

Claire finally realized where they were. She could see Erica, Benny, and Caroline glaring at her and whispering to each other. A part of her blushed, embarrassed to be caught with Allison and embarrassed to be judged because of it.

And that was when she saw Bender enter the school, with Freddie by his side. And she got angry. She glared right back at her friends. This is all your fault, she thought. She knew later she'd be right back to hanging out with them, but in the moment she hated those bitches.

But deep down she knew it wasn't their fault at all. Sure, peer pressure was a reality in her life, but no one had forced her to do anything. No one had made her the person Saidie had called her out for being—no one but Claire Standish herself.

"Don't worry about it. They can't tell me who to talk to." Claire whispered to Allison. But then she said, "I better get to my locker so I can get to class on time. I'll talk to you later, Alli."

Allison knew she was lying; that the way Claire's friends were staring did bother Claire, and that she'd seen Bender come in and probably just wanted to find a way to be alone with him before class. But she didn't say anything. She just nodded and walked off.

Claire had seen Bender grab something out of Freddie's locker, pat him on the back, and go right back outside. She figured he was headed to get a smoke in before class.

Her plan had been to follow him. And she'd almost done it. But at the last minute, she lost her nerve.

She wasn't ready to hear him break her heart, and she certainly didn't want him chewing her out in front of the other burnouts.

But halfway through first period, she found her nerve. She excused herself to go to the bathroom, and left class in search of Bender. She knew there was no way he'd have gone to first period after smoking during homeroom. Skipping class when he wanted was nothing to John Bender. Sometimes she wished she could be as nonchalant as him about school. But then again, she was pretty sure what people like her and Brian had to work for came easily and naturally to John Bender. Before she'd met Bender, she'd believed, like everyone else, that he was kept back a few times because he was an idiot. But she now knew it was because he missed so much class because he often avoided school to hide

injuries from his dad.

Claire believed that if Bender really cared, he could easily have made straight A's. The fact that he breezed through school despite all his absences and missed lessons was proof enough of that.

Finally she found him sitting on top of a radiator, looking around the corner. Probably keeping an eye out for Vernon, she realized.

Claire decided to simply walk past him, and see if he spoke first.

He didn't. But he wasn't even really looking at her. It was liking he was thinking about something, looking past her.

She cleared her throat. "John?" she said.

Bender's eyes got wide and he shook his head as if to clear it.

"What do you want, Queenie?"

Queenie. Never a good sign when he called her that. He knows.

She said the only thing she could think to say. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"What the fuck are you apologizing for?"

Claire looked up at his face. He didn't look angry. He looked confused.

"Um…for everything."

"What are you babbling about, Claire? It's not your fucking fault. Dick is just being even more of an asshole than usual."

Now it was Claire's turn to be confused. He wasn't mad at her? But there was no way he'd forgive her for being a bitch and attacking the closest thing he had to family.

Maybe he didn't know. Maybe he just hadn't been in touch with Saidie yet, and his foul mood didn't have anything to do with her.

"Did something happen with your dad? Is that why you're so upset?"

"No, Queenie. I just told you. Dick is being an asshole today. I didn't even go home last night. I went to band practice with a few guys, and then I crashed at Saidie's."

So he had seen Saidie. Why was he not pissed at Claire? Surely Saidie had told him everything the first chance she got.

Or maybe he'd just gone by after she was sleep and crashed on her couch or something.

"Um, I didn't see Saidie with you when you first came in this morning."

"That's because I left before her parents got up. I didn't feel like sleeping on the couch so I stretched out on her floor and talked until she fell asleep. I didn't want her to get into trouble for having me in her room. Can you fucking imagine? The pastor's daughter caught harboring criminal fucking teenagers?" His eyes widened in sarcastic disbelief.

Claire was barely listening to Bender anymore. She didn't even get slightly jealous at the mention of Bender sleeping in another girl's bedroom when he hadn't even been in hers.

Saidie hadn't told Bender. But why? Claire had been so sure she would.

"Um, I guess we better get to class before Vernon catches us and comes down even harder on you."

She turned to leave.

"Cherry, wait." When Claire turned back around, he pulled her towards him and kissed her.

"I'm glad I ran into you. What are you doing for Halloween?"

Claire was so ecstatic that Bender wasn't breaking up with her that she could barely think.

"Um…I usually just give out candy at home. And that weekend is my friend Annabelle's party, so I usually go to that. Why?"

"Every year, me and Saidie and Freddie always go to this party at this club we hang out at. There's usually a live concert going on, and Saidie is real excited for it this year because there's supposed to some great Ramones cover band this year. I say I'll be the judge of that, but I wanted to know if you'd come. Or would Her Royal Highness not be caught dead in our infested surroundings?" He said, smirking.

Claire rolled her eyes playfully and kissed him again. "If you want me there, I'm there." she said. She wasn't so sure about Saidie wanting her there, but she definitely needed to talk to her, and soon.

"Fucking peachy," Bender replied, "She's inviting Big Bri, so this should be interesting."

A double date. Claire knew it would definitely be a night she wouldn't soon forget.

The day was turning out to be much better than Claire could have ever expected.

But she didn't want to get her hopes up too much. Claire knew there was still one other obstacle she had to face.

She looked out for Saidie between classes all morning. She hadn't seen her on the steps, Bender hadn't come to school with her, and Brian had been with his physics club friends the one time Claire had seen him that morning. He had waved to her excitedly and looked like he wanted to go talk to her, but decided against it. So Claire knew that Saidie hadn't told him, either.

The girl was nowhere to be found. There was only one thing for Claire to do.

Thanks to Andy, she knew where Saidie was during lunch. Which was a good thing, because it gave her an excuse to avoid her friends at lunch. Charlotte had passed notes to Claire all during fourth period, and she had ignored every single one of them.

Saidie was sitting on the front steps (waiting for her father, no doubt), when Claire made it to the front of the school. Claire rushed down the steps toward her.

"Saidie? Could we talk?" She began.

Saidie finally looked up at her. Claire could see that she was crying.

"What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

But Saidie didn't answer.

"Saidie, I'm so sorry about yesterday. I—"

"Forget it," Saidie finally spoke, trying desperately to wipe her eyes. "I'm sorry, too."

Claire was confused. Everything Saidie had said was true. And she was right, she had tried to be nice to Claire, and Claire had shot her down at every turn.

"Why are you apologizing? You didn't do anything. Saidie, what's wrong?" Claire figured if Saidie had been kind enough to keep her mouth shut, then the least she could do was try to figure out what was wrong and comfort her.

Something about Claire's compassion made Saidie cry even harder. She looked like she was seriously debating telling Claire what was wrong.

Just as she started to say something, a car horn honked and startled them both. Saidie's dad had arrived to pick her up for lunch.

Saidie wiped her face one last time and said, "I've got to go." She tried to put on a happier face so her father wouldn't know she'd been crying. Before Claire could say goodbye, she was gone.

Claire couldn't imagine what could possibly have someone as happy-go-lucky as Saidie so upset. She shrugged and went to face her friends. It turned out that one of the girls in Caroline's group had had a very public breakup with her boyfriend before lunch, so that was all anyone was talking about. No one even remembered Claire's faux pas of being seen in public with Andrew Clark and the school freak.

The rest of the day went by in a blur. Claire couldn't wait until the day was over and she could begin her weekend. She was so happy that nothing had happened to destroy her relationship with Bender, that she was almost bursting to tell Annabelle.

Finally, the last bell rang, and she had to stop herself from running to her car, where she and Annabelle had planned to meet.

"Claire? Are you okay? You've been acting strange all day, and then you were talking with Andy and that weird girl this morning. What's going on with you?"

Claire sighed. Where could she even begin? "Do you remember that day when we ditched to go to that sale? And I got caught because I stayed behind to find my necklace? And got detention?"

Annabelle nodded.

"Well….There's a lot I never told anyone about that detention. I…there were all these kids there from these different groups. It was the weirdest thing, but it was kind of the best day of my life. We all ended up talking and…I've never been able to talk to other kids like that. That's why I've been trying to tell you that I understand where you're coming from with this boy you like. I made some new friends that day. They're nothing like us. I mean, Andy Clark was there, and Allison—the girl he's dating now, she was there, and it was this whole big monster deal. I've been secretly hanging out with these people after school and on the weekend. But I learned a lot that day. Especially…especially from this one boy."

Anabelle smiled at her and made kissing noises. "Claire Standish, did you meet a boy in detention?!"

Claire giggled and nodded, trying not to take her eyes off the road. "Who is he?!" Annabelle practically shrieked.

"He's….he's really cute. And smart. And kind of rebellious. And I can't believe I'm saying this, but he's funny and witty and weirdly charming. And…oh my gosh, Annabelle, he's not like any boy in our group. He doesn't care about stupid shallow stuff and he acts tough, but he's a big teddy bear deep down. He's not from one of the families on our side of town, and he's kind of in a different social group, so that's why I haven't told anyone."

"So have you spoken to him since detention?" Annabelle was practically giddy.

"That's the thing. He's kind of my boyfriend now. And I think he's getting tired of being a secret."

"Boyfriend?! Claire Standish, you tell me who he is right this second!"

"Okay, but you have to tell me the name of your guy right after." Claire demanded.

"Deal."

"Do you know John Bender?"

Annabelle gasped. "Know him! John Bender is the school criminal! Everyone knows who he is! Claire, you're dating John Bender?!"

Claire laughed to herself, starting to get nervous. "It feels weird to call it dating. But I guess that's true. Oh my god, I'm actually dating John Bender." It was as if finally saying it out loud had made it hit home for her.

Annabelle sat in silence for a few minutes, letting this sink in. "Well, I can see the appeal. He's pretty hot. Plus he's got that bad boy thing going on. Wow." Annabelle shook her head, as if clearing it.

"Okay. Your turn, Annabelle. Who's this guy you've got the hots for?"

Annabelle blushed. "Um, well, I talked to him today. I think he likes me. And I kind of told Caroline about it. We have gym together. She helped me out a lot. See, he's in the smart group. The academic club type. But he's gotten so hot, Claire. Caroline says that since he's hot now, I don't have anything to worry about. She says that we can kind of make him over, make him cool, and I can openly date him because he'll be one of us."

Claire wasn't convinced, but if it made things easier for Annabelle, then she wasn't going to stand in her way. She shrugged. "I guess that would work. So what's his name?"

"You probably don't know him. But he's really cute. And nice. And such a gentleman. And funny. He makes me feel like a good person when I talk to him, which is, like, pretty rare anyway."

Claire laughed. "You're stalling, Annabelle. What's his name?"

Annabelle sighed. "Brian Johnson."

And Claire had to slam on the brakes to keep from wrecking her car, as she couldn't keep her eyes on the road any longer.

A/N So, there you have it. Annabelle's secret has been revealed.

Coming Soon: Find out why Saidie was crying. Brian is a wanted man. The gang celebrates Halloween, and Claire surprises Bender by inviting him into her world for a night, reciprocating his invitation. And later: Brian's life gets a little more interesting and he comes close to screwing it all up; and Andy plays friendship matchmaker for Saidie and Allison, while making a new friend of his own.