Chapter 9: Jace

The streets of Alicante are relatively busy. People walk in and out of the classic weapon and gear shops while others are just riding on horseback just because they can. I itch to get on Wayfarer and just gallop for miles but I haven't been able to do that in weeks. That's high on my priority list.

The group coming to the tailors isn't as big as the one going to the Silent City was. The parents are taking the couples alone, meaning the only ones going are me, Clary, my mother, and Jocelyn.

The Silent City. I still can't believe that the whole thing happened. Even though I was just sworn to a sword, this feels life-changing. Dombra has lightened up my view of the world, however ironic that might be. And I find it even better that my future wife has the other half of this legendary pair.

Today's been an alright day, besides this morning in the hall. I don't know what spurred Clary to step back but it kind of hurt me. I thought we were having a valuable moment - hell, I thought we were going to kiss for a few seconds - and then she put space between us that seemed as great as the divide between Heaven and Hell.

Speaking of the devil, Clary bumps into my side while we trudge down a hill. Our mothers are chatting excitedly in front of us and I can only imagine what they are scheming.

"Pretty crazy day, huh?" Clary asks softly. I can barely hear her over the din of the surrounding city.

I nod. This day has gone beyond words. I can't tell if I should mark it as great or just super odd but either way, I have Dombra. And Clary.

"

Never had a day like it before."

She gives me a side-glance. "I would seriously alarmed if you have had one like this."

I chuckle. Clary's one of the only people that can make me crack a genuine smile, let alone laugh, and the list of people that can do what she does is microscopically low. "Smart-ass."

We fall silent. I can feel the stares and faintly hear the whispers as we walk down the street but they don't bother me. It never has and that won't change.

"What's your opinion on this whole marriage thing, Jace?" Clary whispers. She sounds worried, scared. My heart breaks just a little at the raw expression on her face.

In a split-second decision, I grab her hand. She stares at them first before meeting my eyes with her own. I know I shouldn't say this yet but I can't help the words that are coming out.

"I believe that it's the best thing that's ever happened to me," I say and her eyes grow wide. "I've liked you for as long as I can remember and you never gave me the time of day. Some part of me wants this to be nonexistent, that maybe this was just a little crush that didn't mean anything, but the bigger part of me is over the moon."

We unconsciously slow our pace. Clary stares at me, mouth open. She closes it several times, trying to find the right words, but they don't seem to come.

This is the moment. This will decide how we will spend the rest of our lives. I put my piece out, leaving it up to Clary and this is one of the only decisions I had hoped she didn't have to make. Because I'm 100% sure she doesn't feel the same.

The jingle of a bell makes us both look up. We are standing in front of the tailor and our mothers just entered. They look ecstatic. Clary goes to follow them but I pull her back.

"Clary, you don't have to answer. You don't have to tell me you love me back. But please, please, help me—help us work this marriage out," I ask earnestly.

She nods. "I'll try." Her voice cracks in between the two words and I know I've broken a wall. Voices crack only when there's a considerable amount of emotion.

Clary turns around and goes into the store with me on her tail. With no surprise, we find our mothers already immersed in the bride section. An older lady is gushing with them, though her opinion seems more educated.

All three of them look up when we round the corner and the lady's face lights up. "Is this the bride?"

Jocelyn nods. "My daughter, Clary."

The lady scurries over and studies her. "She's gorgeous. Oh, I know the exact dress!" At those words, she darts off while Clary blushes furiously.

"Feel weird yet?" I whisper.

"I felt weird just walking through this place." She stuffs her hands in her pockets. "Why do we have to go first?"

"Your father wanted the strongest to be before the weak. Meaning, we're here because of me." I smirk at her annoyed expression.

"If you keep that arrogance up, we're going to have some issues, mister."

I nudge her playfully. "You know it's a joke."

She frowns. "Do I?"

The next few hours are focused on clothes. I never knew there were so many different types of black and styles of ceremonial gear. I'll never be able to look at myself the same way again.

The workers and our mothers made sure that Clary and I never saw the other person. I get that I can't see Clary but I don't understand why she can't see me. Who wouldn't want to see me?

When we're finished, I'm both mentally and physically exhausted. And if I'm this bad, I can't imagine Clary. She must be a wreck.

Mom hurries around the corner, eyes alight. "They'll have the suit ready in two days," she says. "Jocelyn and Clary still have a few more dresses to get through, so it'll just be you and more going back right now."

I shrug. "Alright."

Mom and I walk through the streets in a familial silence. My mind is temporarily calm, something that doesn't happen often and I very much enjoy. It's a calming experience and I'm going to need it for the coming weeks.

At some point, the sun set and the streets are flooded with the glow of the witchlights. The crowds thin and store fronts close. Windows brighten as people enter rooms.

My mother turns to me. "You almost didn't have to marry Clary, you know," she says softly. "I mean, you were going to be engaged to someone but it almost wasn't her."

I raise an eyebrow. "Why'd that change?"

"Because both your father and I knew how much you cared for her and we knew that you would protect her to the ends of the earth. Not many people benefit from arranged marriages but you did. And Clary did too, which I know she'll realize one day." She sighs. "One thing you need to remember, Jace—and it's not something you have a problem with now but you might later—is that Clary is a girl. She had her mood swings and she's very insecure. Don't push her too far but don't hold back. Go slow because this is—Clary isn't prepared. She's never...just let her set the pace."

I tip my head back, trying to let Mom's words sink in. I don't know what my mother's referring to when the topic of why she said it comes up. I didn't-don't-plan to force Clary to do anything and I know mood swings. I mean, I've known Izzy for a very long time. So what is my mom trying to say?

"Did you hear me?"

I nod. "Yes, I heard you. And I understand."

"Good. Now, let's get home."

(A week later…)

My heart thunders in my chest. My palms sweat. My knees feel weak.

Want to know why?

I'm.

Getting.

Freaking.

Married.

Today.

Damn.

I pace my room, trying to ignore the din of the massive crowd that can be heard a block from the Hall of Accords. Half of the Shadowhunter population must be in attendance at this wedding. I mean, yeah, who wouldn't want to miss the wedding of Jace Herondale and Clarissa Morgenstern, but couldn't they have something else to do? What happened to the demons prowling the world?

The door opens and I look up. Alec walks over and slings an arm around my shoulders in the way I'd always known.

"You know, I never thought I'd see the day when Jace Herondale is actually nervous," Alec jokes, trying to lighten my mood.

I smile half-heartedly. "Well, when's that day coming?"

My parabatai chuckles. "Pretty soon." Alec gives me a once over, his hand momentarily brushing invisible dust off my shoulder. "You'll be fine, Jace. You're marrying the girl you've loved for years today. Who cares if all of Alicante is here? You're Jace Herondale, you don't give two craps, right?"

I run a hand through my hair. "I shouldn't but I do."

"Well, tell the part of you that does to shut up." Alec claps me on the back. "Now, you and I have to get our butts out to the Hall or your father is going to have some issues with us."

I smirk. "Those issues better not damage my hair."

Alec sighs. "And he's back," he mutters.

With newly-found enthusiasm in my step, I sling an arm over Alec's shoulder. "Where did I go? Last time I checked, people called me a lost penny. I always manage to show up."

My parabatai doesn't reply because my wit is so high, he can't even try to comeback to my ingenious responses.

We walk to the Accords Hall, where my father is waiting for us. He's my suggenes, just as General Morgenstern is Clary's. I'm not excited for the part where we get welcomed into the other's family. The thought of giving the general a hug is just as intimidating as he is. And that's saying a lot.

My dad smiles proudly as we approach. He pulls me into a hug as soon as I'm close enough. "I can't believe the day is actually here. My son is getting married." His voice, no matter how dry his eyes may be, is heavy with emotion. If my dad's this bad, what about my mom? Oh no. "Well," my dad continues, "I can't keep you any longer. You have a girl to wed."

Dad pushes me toward the Hall, trailing slightly and keeping pace with Alec. Ahead are the Morgenstern brothers, the rest of the Lightwood males, and Simon.

Jonathan looks me up and down in a calculating manner. His green eyes almost make me cower with their intensity. He makes a satisfied noise in the back of his throat as I stop in front of them. Talk about being intimidating.

Sebastian hits his brother on the arm. "Stop being so…you, Jon. Jace has it bad enough." He gestured toward the humongous Accords Hall, where the voices of people were so loud I was tempted to cover my ears.

Jon nudges Seb right back. "He's marrying our little sister. I have to make sure he fits my standards!"

Seb groans. "Clary can handle herself."

"That's what you say—"

"Enough, you two," Robert booms. He glares at the two long enough so they understand that of all times, now is not it for arguing.

My dad comes up from behind me. "It's go time, Jace."

I breathe deeply as we line up. My nerves need to take a chill pill. I will not freeze up. No, never, not gonna happen. You hear that brain?

Izzy walks up next to me, taking her place as the Maid of Honor. We link arms and she grins, practically laughing through her eyes. "You nervous?"

I shake my head, blatantly lying. "Nope."

She raises her eyebrows in mock disbelief because Izzy will always know when I'm lying. "Really? that's great! So it doesn't matter to you that every Shadowhunter whose opinion you care about is standing in that hall waiting for you to mess up?"

I groan. Izzy can be a real pain sometimes and she was being a huge one right now. "Thanks a lot. I needed that."

The next few minutes are a blur. It's a mix of anxiety, anticipation, and pure happiness. All I can register throughout those few next moments are that I end up standing before a Silent Brother with my dad behind me, staring at the place where I know Clary will be emerging from any second now.

Unlike before, which happened all in a blur, when Clary reveals herself, time slows to a crawl.

It's so hard to describe how completely and absolutely beautiful Clary is. Her dress is slim and long, sparkling a deep gold in the sunlight that floods through the Hall. It casts light on her fair skin, accenting how smooth it looks. The front strands of her hair are pulled back into a braid but the rest of it is down, just how I like it. But I can't get over her eyes.

There is no make makeup surrounding her eyes. They are the same pure green I fell in love with all those years ago. They're bright and for the first time, I see a Clary who is free and happy with no weight on her shoulders. My heart swells with overwhelming and eternal love for this woman.

And when our eyes meet, I know for a fact that any doubts I had or she had were gone. Any whispers of fear disappeared like they were never there in the first place. I know that despite whatever feelings that may have been felt by the other before this were gone, replaced by adoration and love that is flowing from our pores. Everyone else fades from view except the one person I am destined for.

Clarissa Adele Morgenstern.

When she arrives at the end of the aisle where I'm standing, I'm all too eager to grab her hands. The Silent Brother speaks words I'm only partially listening to—the rest of my attention is focused on Clary.

The runes come and go. I will never forget the feeling of all of my emotions toward her, flowing from me through the stele and into her arm. I will never lose the memory of her doing the same to me, sending all of her love to me in the symbol of the wedding rune, permanent as as the Angel in the Heavens.

And at long last, I finally get to do what I've been itching to do for all those years ago from when I first fell in love with her to now.

"I wed you Mr. and Mrs. Jonathan Christopher Herondale."

And that's all I hear as I lower my lips to Clary's, wrapping ourselves in flames of heavenly fire, threatening to burn us to the ground with the power of our love.

Through all the pain Clary's put me through, we're finally together.

Forever.

Sorry, it took so long to update. School has really put me through a loop and I can't find the time to write. I hope to be more consistent this year.