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Olivia watched as Alex slept, though the sun had long before risen. She hadn't been able to sleep after carrying her into the cave so sat awake the whole night just watching. She had hoped that after their first conversation Alex would have wanted to talk, would have been happy to talk, but since that day she hadn't uttered a word. Olivia didn't understand what had happened the night before. One moment she had been talking, trying to get Alex to engage and the next Alex was gasping for breath and holding her fists so tightly on her legs her knuckles were white. It had scared her slightly as she had held her, waiting for the screaming to stop but it appeared as if Alex was sleeping better than she ever had.

The other's seemed to share her fear and even Elliot her pity as they had gathered round the sleeping woman that night. Munch had sighed after a while and shrugged his shoulders before going back to his mattress and Amanda and Elliot were quick to follow. Finn, seeing that she wouldn't be sleeping anytime soon, had placed a hand on her shoulder and sat down beside her. They had both kept vigil that night but as the sun rose the others had slowly left the cave till only Olivia and Alex were left.

She loved how the cave looked in the day. The sun shining through the waterfall cast rippling shadows on the walls so it felt as if one were floating under water. She didn't mind that it was slightly damp or even a little cold because in those moments the waterfall seemed to be made of diamonds. Alex rolled over and Olivia watched as she slowly drifted to surface of consciousness her grey eyes coming to rest on hers.

'Good afternoon.'

'God is it that late?' Alex said, sitting up and leaning back against the wall.

'No,' Olivia smiled, 'I'm only messing. It is kind of late though. You needed the sleep I guess.'

Alex just stared, her melt down from the night before in the air between them. She didn't know what to say but Olivia jumped in to save her.

'You don't have to explain. It's not my business if you don't want it to be.'

Alex looked away at the floor, focusing on the cold wall at her back, stretching her legs out in front of her.

'I don't want your pity,' she started, twisting her fingers in her hands. 'My life has been different but nothing bad ever happened to me.'

'What do you class as bad?'

Alex's eyes shot up to meet Olivia, her anger coming fast and shocking her.

'I wasn't abused, so if your sick mind has gone there you can forget it,' she almost growled. Olivia didn't respond fast enough for Alex and the pity didn't leave her eyes so she continued, 'you see them don't you? You travel like me? In the villages the kids will come out, they hide behind their houses sometimes but they're always curious to see you. You can tell which ones are loved, which ones are feed, which ones are beaten and you can always tell which ones are hurt. It's in their eyes I think. Their eyes just don't have any life in them anymore, it's like their dead before they've even learnt how to live. Nobody ever hurt me like that Olivia and I don't want anyone's pity for something that never happened.'

Olivia had seen them. Knew exactly what Alex was talking about. What she didn't tell the blond was that she saw the exact same look in her eyes as she sat there in front of her. If Alex wanted to make the distinction between her and them then Olivia wasn't going to stop her. Not while she was talking.

'I believe you.'

They sat in silence for a time, each lost in their own thoughts and memories before Alex said in a quiet broken voice, turning her head to the side to hide her tears.

'God Olivia why am I alive?'

Olivia sat shocked at Alex's question, at her sudden show of vulnerability. 'You're a good person Alex,' she answered after a time. She wasn't sure exactly why she wanted the blond to live so badly, trusted her from the start but for some reason she did. Telling Alex she was good person was as close as she could come to explaining that gut feeling.

Alex threw her head back against the wall and laughed, tears clinging unshed to her eyelashes.

'There are three possibilities that explain who I am. One is that I'm a bad person. Two is that I'm a good person. Three is that good and bad do not exist.' She caught Olivia's eyes again to make sure she was paying attention. 'My father has spent his whole life trying to convince me of number three, and some days I believe him but at heart I think I do believe in my nursemaid's stories.

Two is impossible. I've watched as people's last penny was taken from them, as their homes were burnt; as their families were burnt; God!' the tears were back in her eyes, 'I've helped do it all. I gave up being a good person a long time ago. That only leaves number one. I'm a bad person. So I'll ask you again Olivia,' her voice once clear was now starting to choke, 'why the fuck am I still alive?'

Olivia leaned forward and took Alex's hands in hers, holding her chin when she tried to turn her face away. 'Alex look at me.' Alex kept her eyes on the cave wall. 'Alex! Look at me.' She slowly turned her eyes to meet Olivia's, unable to look away from the sincerity she found there.

'You are more than you think you are. I can't explain why I know that, but I do. You are more than that man raised you to be.'

Alex swallowed as Olivia leant back and sat against the opposite side of the cave. She refused to cry no matter how many tears pooled in her eyes.

'Did you enjoy it?'

'What?' Alex was confused by Olivia's question.

'Did you enjoy it? Taking people's money, burning their homes.'

Alex remained silent before lowering her head and whispering to the ground.

'Sometimes.'

'How often.'

'What?' she was getting annoyed at Olivia's cryptic questioning.

'How often did you enjoy it? Every time, every other time, once in ten?'

Alex let her anger show on her face but Olivia only shrugged and waited for a response.

'I didn't exactly keep note! Maybe once a year.'

'How did you feel every other time?'

'Empty,' Alex looked down again, 'like it wasn't me, but the shell of me. As if my armour could move by its self and I was just stuck in it.'

Looking at the floor Alex missed the pain that crossed Olivia's face before she was able to school her expression.

'When I was in the Holy land,' Olivia said, 'I was part of a raiding band. We were attacking Saracen supply trains before they could reach Acre. One time it was blisteringly hot and I'd managed to burn really badly the day before so I was feeling sorry for myself. Angry at these men who thought they could take our Holy cities. We attacked a caravan and killed every one of the guards. I didn't use my bow that day, I wanted to watch as I killed them. I killed a boy, he barely had a beard, but do know Alex,' she waited for the blond to look at her, 'I felt happy. I enjoyed sticking the knife in his belly, paying him back for how bad I thought my life was. Am I a good person?'

'Of course.' Alex responded quickly.

'And yet I've just admitted I enjoyed hurting someone else, no different to you. Why am I good and you're bad?'

Alex shook her head. 'It's not the same Liv.' Olivia smiled inwardly at Alex's use of her nickname. 'You help people, you save people. So what if you killed a Saracen. That as war. You're doing the right thing now.'

'Can't you see Alex?' Olivia said ardently, 'It' all about choices, you just said it. Yes in my past I might have enjoyed killing but when I got back to England I knew I wanted to be a different person, a good person. You're just at a different stage of life to me that's all. We're the same it's just you're still stuck in the Holy land.'

Alex smiled softly but sadly. 'The difference is Liv that you got to come home. The "Holy land" is my home, I've got nowhere else to go.'

'Build a new home.'

'Where can I possibly do that?' Olivia made it sound so easy.

'With me.'

Olivia was shocked at her admission and Alex's wide eyes showed she was too. She hadn't thought about it just said exactly what she'd been thinking.

'I can be your home Alex.'

The hall was empty as the Sheriff paced back and forth in front of his lieutenant.

'Where the fuck is he! It's been a week, they can't have just vanished!' He shouted.

'We've searched the whole forest my Lord.'

'Well search it again because that bitch is holding my son captive!'

'Fucking move!' he screamed at the still stationary soldier, who scuttled backwards out of the hall.

He continued pacing, slowly wearing a hole in the wood. He didn't understand how Alex had let that archer bitch get the better of her but he was sure as hell going to find out when he got Alex back.

'My lord.'

A scared mousy looking man was standing in front of him.

'Who the fuck let you in?' he said dangerously, still angry and happy to take it out on anyone.

'The guards my lord, I may have some information about the Black Cloak.'

He stood shaking slightly before an impatient 'well' from the Sheriff started him talking.

'It was the night before Benson's hanging my Lord. I didn't come sooner because I wasn't sure, thought the Black Cloak would be found and all,' he paused but the Sheriff didn't criticize him he continued, getting faster with every word.

'I had a bet with Edward in the kitchen see. We both wanted Maggie and decided to let her choose you know. She chose him so I thought it best to drown my sorrows. I drank a little too much perhaps and fell asleep by the stables. I woke up for no reason I thought, but after a while I heard voices from behind the stable. It was the Black Cloak and that Benson woman talking. She, Benson that is, then walked through the wall and the Black Cloak walked back. I pretended to be asleep till the alarm was sounded.'

The sheriff stopped pacing but didn't say anything.

'Was I wrong to tell you my lord?'

'No.' he said airily, as if he'd forgotten the man was there, 'No you weren't wrong. Have you told anyone else per chance?'

'No my Lord, I wasn't too sure what I'd seen.'

'Good. That's good, keep it that way will you.' He smiled, 'you did well to tell me this.'

The man nodded and quickly left the hall at the Sheriff's hand, happy to not have gotten into trouble.

The sheriff went back to pacing but this time he was muttering under his breath.

Alex had betrayed him. His own daughter had betrayed him. Now it was all the more important that he find them both. He'd run a knife through that green backed whore in front of her then remind Alex just whose family she belonged to.