I had another chapter planed (ish) but after BK's review I was too stoked to write this so if you don't like it... blame them :D jokes aside love getting ideas in reviews, can't promise to do all of them, especially major plot functions, but they are inspiring.

Thanks for reading and please do review.

Olivia was used to living a hard life. Used to living outdoors in the freezing winter of England with barely enough food to get by. She'd done it all before and to be honest the bee keeper's house was a luxury compared to some of the places she had stayed.

Alex on the other hand was not. This was the first winter she was spending without the protection of stone walls and rugs. Without the plentiful food from a castle kitchen and furs to sleep under. She never complained; not when they had little to eat; not when the shivering was so bad at night neither one of them could sleep; not even when they had to break the ice on their water before they could wash.

If Olivia was a crueller or even just a bitterer person she would have been happy that the blonde princess was finally learning how the majority lived. However, Olivia wasn't a bitter person. She knew that all the physical hardship would not teach Alex more about the suffering of the serfs than her own life had already taught her. If anyone thought that Alex was a princess they would be sorely mistaken.

Olivia wished she could put more food on the table but apart from what she could catch they had to ration their supplies. As for the weather she had no control over that and so sleepless nights would keep happening whether she wished them away or not. The ice, however, she thought she might have a solution, if only a temporary one.

'What is that?' Alex came walking through the door one night carrying two buckets of water over her shoulders to see Olivia crouched in the middle of the room over a long metal tub.

'Oh you're back.' Olivia said turning round, 'it's a bath tub. I don't know about you but I'm getting sick of ice cold sponge baths so….' She knelt on the ground with her arms thrown wide a grin splitting her face.

'For real?' Alex asked still looking dubious.

'We're going to need a lot more water and it won't be really warm because it's going to take a while to fill and I've got to get it and the pots back by next Monday, plus we now owe Mrs Smith three jars of honey,' Olivia reeled off, 'but apart from that, yeah for real; I've got soap and everything.'

Olivia's grin and enthusiasm were contagious and soon they had a roaring fire going and a three-quarter full bathtub. Olivia stuck another pot of water on the fire before standing up and announcing it was ready.

Olivia had warmer baths but at this moment she wouldn't have swapped the hottest water for what she had. They undressed in silence. Olivia wasn't the least bit embarrassed but Alex, even after they had seen each other naked on numerous occasions still blushed red every time she was without her dress. Not wanting to draw attention to the blonde's discomfort Olivia turned quickly and stepped into the water, stretching out her legs and sighing as the warmth embraced her. She turned her head to see that Alex hadn't moved from the side of the tub, her hands clenched at her sides to stop them from covering her body. No matter how many times Olivia had seen her she truly believed she would never get over how beautiful she was. There were scars of course, but instead of detracting from her beauty Olivia thought they only added to it. A testament to how much she had survived, how strong she was.

'You'll get cold standing there like that.' she said with a smile. Alex smiled back but made no move to climb into the bath. 'Do you want me to move my legs?'

'No.' Alex said quickly suddenly moving and stepping into the water so that Olivia had to open her legs to not be stood on.

It had been almost two months since she had suggested her idea and though Alex had never exactly said yes they had been slowly moving forward. Olivia learnt that Alex's problem was over thinking, was getting ahead of where she was. So they could be kissing and Alex would panic because she would imagine taking her dress off; or they could be touching each other's breasts and Alex would panic thinking about moving her hands lower. They agreed one night that the problem wasn't what they were doing but the expectation that such acts came with and the fear that such expectations couldn't be met.

After a number of panic attacks and tears it wasn't Alex who withdrew but Olivia. She couldn't stand the thought that she was hurting her, pressuring Alex into doing something she wasn't ready for however much she said she wanted it, and so Olivia decided to stop. They would wait, she decided, wait until Alex was better.

'Lex I'm not saying that.'

'You're tired of me.'

'No!' Olivia said walking over and getting to her knees in front of Alex, where she sat at the table. She couldn't stand to see the pained hurt look on her face. 'I'll never be tired of you.'

'But you don't want to….be intimate.'

'I don't want to hurt you.'

'You're not hurting me.'

'The crying and shaking say otherwise Lex.'

'I….' Alex was frustrated, she didn't know how to tell Olivia that the risk was worth it. That all the flash backs, memories, were worth it just to hold her in her arms, just to be held. 'I'm not broken.' she said in a firm voice.

'I know that,' Olivia answered not meeting her eyes, 'I just think we should wait a bit longer that's all; that we've been moving too fast.'

'Olivia look at me.' Olivia raised her eyes at Alex's stern tone, 'I am not suddenly going to get better. There is not going to be a good time to do this, I'm never going to be perfect and if that's what you want then there's no point you being here.' Alex had tears in her eyes.

'Lex, can't you see that you're already perfect to me. I just can't stand to hurt you, to feel like I'm hurting you.'

'But that's my decision to make.'

Olivia leaned back and looked away, her own tears now pooled in her eyes and Alex suddenly got it. She was so caught up in her own pain, her own struggle to achieve normalcy that she hadn't given one thought as to how it was all affecting Olivia. In struggling to tell the difference between her father's hands and Olivia's, between memories and reality, rape and love she was inadvertently making Olivia feel like a rapist. Whenever she pulled away Olivia was left wondering what she had done that was too close to a rapist's acts.

'Liv I'm so sorry.' Alex said in a broken voice, unable to stop her tears from falling. 'You're nothing like him.'

'I know that,' Olivia replied meeting Alex's eyes again, 'I would never hurt you…. but I am hurting you.'

'It's not you, it's never you.'

'But it feels like it,' Olivia said shrugging dejectedly, ending their conversation.

After that they had been almost shy with each other. Barely talking and touching only when necessary. It was a week later, at night in bed, that Olivia had felt Alex press her body against her back. They had spent the night pressed together, hip to hip, their tongues and teeth roaming each other's lips and jaws. It was after that that Olivia suggest they set boundaries. They would spend one night kissing, another night touching above clothes, another touching above clothes just above the waist. However much they wanted to go further they would stop themselves and slowly the boundaries would become larger until they both felt comfortable enough to love each other completely.

So far they had only made it to touching- hands only- everywhere with clothes and touching above the waist without clothes. That was why when Olivia felt Alex's naked back lean against her chest in the bath and her arse press into her sex she had to tilt her head back to stifle a moan.

They sat together in a comfortable silence for a long time, their hands entwined under the water. Although the fire was burning and spitting right next to them Olivia couldn't help but notice that the cold air had hardened Alex's nipples into tight pink pebbles and she had to close her eyes to resist lifting her hands to touch them.

When the water had cooled and a bubbling could be heard from the fire Alex sat up and reached for the pot of near boiling water.

'You want this is now?' Alex asked.

Olivia nodded, 'be careful not to burn yourself.' Alex carefully lifted the pot and avoiding their legs poured into the tub. Both woman gasped then chuckled at their reactions as the water suddenly became hot again. Olivia leant forward and started to move the water around the bath, making sweeping motions with her arms. Alex joined in and soon they were giggling like little girls as the water became waves around them. Still chuckling Olivia leaned back again but Alex stayed hunched over where she was.

'Can you wash my hair for me?'

'Yeah sure.' Olivia said picking up the soap. She inched forward and after pouring water over Alex's head started lathering her hair in soap. She was concentrating so hard on making sure it was all rubbed into her scalp that she almost missed the first moan that Alex made. The second however was louder and unmistakable for what it was. She chuckled in part to try and hide the sharp pulse she suddenly felt between her legs and moved forward to look at Alex's face over her shoulder.

'That feels good huh?'

Alex was biting her lip, trying to prevent any more noises and it became a game between the two of them. Olivia trying to make Alex moan, Alex trying to stay silent. By the time that Olivia rinsed the bubbles away the pulse in her sex had become a throb and she had to bite back her own moan as Alex moved back to press against her again. The room smelled of smoke and the rose scent of the soap and gone were the two girls playing with the water.

Alex was leaning her head back against Olivia's shoulder staring up into her eyes and Olivia leaned forward and kissed away a small droplet of water that was making its way down Alex's forehead. The blonde's lips parted at the contact and Olivia felt her breath on her face before she moved her mouth down to cover hers. The kiss was slow but hard, both of them batting for control and when Olivia felt she was losing the fight to Alex she moved her mouth down to Alex's jaw.

She scrapped her teeth against her pulse point and the blonde arched against her a cry falling from her lips. Olivia felt her hips involuntary jerk forward at the sound and at feeling her throbbing centre rub against Alex's arse she couldn't help but moan herself.

She wouldn't have given up the months with Alex for anything but the frustration was becoming unbearable. Every time they would get so far and…. not that she was complaining, but being so close all the time meant that she felt as if the slightest touch would enough to send her over the edge. She could have dealt with it on her own of course but for one there was not much privacy, and two the thought of fantasying about Alex without her knowing felt like a violation and she couldn't make herself do it.

They were both panting now, Olivia sucking on Alex's neck. She was sure to leave a mark but she was beyond caring. Alex pressed her arse back again and Olivia groaned into her neck. Her clit was throbbing and she was sure Alex had done that on purpose. Her suspicions were confirmed when Alex pressed back again and Olivia now only had the energy to gasp against her skin. She brought her hand to Alex hip to stop her from moving again.

'Lex…' she moaned.

'What?' Alex said with a smile in her voice.

'You know what.'

'Doesn't it feel good.'

'You know how it feels' Olivia replied sternly, gripping Alex's hip harder as she tried to move again. For all that she was frustrated this was not the way she wanted it play out; this was supposed to be about Alex.

'errrm….'

Olivia moved her mouth away from Alex's neck as the reason for the blonde's silence sunk in. 'You've never….'

Alex shook her head quickly, turning her face into Olivia's neck, she didn't want to discuss the details, think about the fear she use to have about her body. She wanted to be normal, she wanted to feel what was making Olivia moan. Without thinking she said in low voice, 'show me.'

Olivia felt her breath catch in her chest. She looked down in to the face below her, flushed from the fire, her eyes filled with nothing but love and trust and decided that today she would mirror that trust. If Alex thought she was ready then Olivia definitely wasn't going to say no.

She kept her left hand on Alex's hip while she brought the other up to her breasts. With her tongue exploring Alex's mouth she let her hand trail water all over Alex's torso until the skin was slick and her nipples were so hard they looked painful. Bringing her left hand up to join the right she palmed both of her breasts, marvelling at how well they fit into her hands and used her fingers to pull and pinch at the nipples until Alex was writhing and panting in her to her mouth.

Olivia wanted to draw the moment out, to touch every inch of skin and run her nails across each rib but Alex had other ideas. Kissing Olivia harder she moved Olivia's right hand down over her stomach and left it just above her sex.

'Please Liv.' She moaned against her neck finally breaking the kiss so she could breathe.

Olivia brought her other hand up to the back of Alex's head and held it against her collar bone as with the other she moved down through the water and to where Alex so desperately wanted it. She ran her fingers through the golden hair that covered her mound before dipping down and lightly brushing her nails against the outside of Alex's lips. The blonde was gasping now and her hips were bucking slightly.

Thinking that she teased her for long enough Olivia slowly eased her finger inside. Both women moaned aloud at the sensation. Olivia didn't know what was warmer, Alex or the water and the feeling of the soft, velvety muscles clenching around her finger were better than she could have ever imagined. She moved out an inch then pushed slowly back in feeling Alex arch against her and make the softest panting noises in the back her throat.

She continued with the slow tortuous pace until she heard Alex almost cry from frustration and realised that she had been teasing just a little a too long. Curling her finger she found the rough patch just inside and rubbed at it while moving her finger faster. With her palm she rubbed against Alex's mound feeling her clit grow hard and throb against her.

As Alex's thrusting grew faster in response Olivia took one of her hands, clutching the edge of the tub, and brought it to her own her chest.

'Play with them, like I was.'

Alex opened her eyes and looked up at her, the blue almost lost with how dark her irises had become. 'Trust me Lex, it feels good.'

Alex closed her eyes again before pulling slightly at her own nipples. She cried out in Olivia's neck at the sensation and Olivia felt a flood of wetness coat her finger.

The sight in the front of her, of Alex laid out, playing with her breasts, her own finger moving between her legs, reminded Olivia of the throbbing at her own centre. In her amazement at what she was doing her own arousal had crept up on her up and she was shocked at how close she was. Alex's bucking hips had caused her arse to lightly rub against Olivia's centre and twined with the image in front of her she couldn't help but moan and thrust her own hips- 'so much for making this about Alex' she thought wryly as her body took control.

'Shit Lex…. I'm close.'

Alex raised her head and opened her eyes. She was panting and moaning freely now and didn't have the breath to respond with words so just pulled Olivia's head down into a searing kiss.

Both women now had their eyes closed, foreheads pressed together as they tried to control their breathing. Olivia was surrounded by warmth. The water running and moving over her body, the slick soft skin sliding over hers, the warm tight wetness that was Alex's sex. She tried to hold on for as long as she could but she was too close.

'Let go for me sweetheart. Cum for me.' she whispered into Alex's ear and as if that were the permission Alex had been waiting for she felt her stiffen against her and her walls clamp down on her finger. The feeling was too much and Olivia felt her pussy throb as it pulsed and her clit twitched against Alex's arse. They both arched up into each other as their toes curled and they cried out, rubbing against the last of the aftershocks.

Olivia slowly withdrew her finger and neither of them spoke as they got their breaths back. They shared a slow but tired kiss and lay back in the rapidly cooling water. They would speak about what just happened but now they were content to just hold each other and know that everything was okay.