A/N: I imagined this as being an alternative season 9 where Harvey and Donna never got together and she continues dating Thomas. I realize this isn't the likeliest scenario, especially on Harvey's side, but just bear with me, haha.
Title and inspiration for this come from the song Mia by Bad Bunny and Drake.
Dile que tú eres mía, mía
Tú misma lo decías
Cuando yo te lo hacía
She doesn't really know how they ended up here.
She's happy with Thomas - thinks she could love him, even, somewhere down the line. And Harvey has proven time and time again that he is not willing to take the final jump. She couldn't keep going like this, giving him chance after chance just to get the door slammed in her face. So she decided to trust Thomas and his open adoration, easy care and funny, light demeanor, and she truly believes she made the right choice.
But something changed between her and Harvey that night in front of the elevator. A new undercurrent sits between them, sparking with tension, heightened moods and shorter patience. It feels like Harvey resents her for being with Thomas and she resents Harvey for resenting her and everything they worked hard to recover after the whole Paula fiasco seems to be going slowly down the drain.
And one night in his office they started with arguing about managing partner stuff and ended with him calling her a hypocrite for never having given them a chance and she should've slapped him but she kissed him instead. And he kissed her. And in a matter of seconds neither one saw passing they were pressing their bodies against each other, heat building between them, as their tongues tangled angrily together.
She somehow had the presence of mind to pull back just enough to pant "Not here" as his hand crept up her skirt, and she barely had time to process as Harvey dragged her off to the bathroom and pummelled deep and hard into her on the sink counter.
They never spoke of it again and she promised herself she wouldn't let that happen again. Thomas is an amazing guy and she truly feels fulfilled. And cheating is horrible, it's not who she is and certainly not who Harvey is.
But in her mind Harvey started visiting her bed after that, some nights even as she was with Thomas. She tried everything and it wouldn't stop and so when he got a little drunk on a late night and found her in her office, the mere way he was looking at her enough to set her insides on fire, she let him fuck her again. And it felt wrong afterwards and she felt infinitely ashamed - and she knows he did too, from the way he wouldn't look at her afterwards - but while they were doing it it felt nothing short of completely right.
It's the fifth time they find themselves pressed against the locked bathroom door, panting against each other as he devours her neck. She hates herself for this, wants to push him off but pulls him in instead, wants to tell him to stop but all that comes out is his name in a breathy whisper.
This time started with an argument about a case, what with Harvey being more on edge, stubborn and antagonistic than ever, and now they're here, his tie loose and his hands kneading her thighs.
"We shouldn't be doing this," she finally manages, though it's admittedly weak.
"Tell me to stop and I will," Harvey tells him, infuriatingly smug, as he nibbles on her clavicle, fully aware she couldn't tell him to stop even if she really wanted to, already too far gone.
He presses the length of his body more heavily into her and she gasps, the feel of his hardness against her hip already making her dizzy.
"This is a bad idea. I care about Thomas," she says even as she untucks his shirt and unbuttons the first buttons, grinding her hips against his. She can't answer his prompt with a lie but she can't tell him the truth either, so she says whatever truth she can muster.
"Please. I bet you anything that you're bored of him already," he counters, voice rough, and she can practically hear him roll his eyes as his hands slide heavily up her sides, catching her breasts over her wrap dress. He kneads them almost harshly, thumb swiping maddeningly over her nipples in a way that makes her lose her train of thought.
"Fuck off. He's twice the man you'll ever be," she says with as much spite as she can muster before she sucks hard on his pulse point. She doesn't mean that, not really, because Harvey is a good man, he just has a penchant for doing the wrong thing. But, then again, Thomas is probably not out there fucking other people in bathrooms, so maybe she does mean that a little bit. Thomas is probably better than her and Harvey combined, but she's too preoccupied with the way their bodies move against each other like magnets to truly mind that.
Harvey pulls back for a second and stops his ministrations. He looks straight at her, his eyes the darkest she's ever seen, and says, voice serious and low, dangerous, "I'm not interested in being the good guy, Donna."
She feels another flush of dampness reach her panties and she thinks she could come from this look and his voice alone, but she doesn't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he got to her, even though he's going to discover that soon. So she just swallows, lifts her chin proudly, looks him squarely in the eyes and practically spits out, "Shut up and fuck me, Harvey."
He captures her lips hungrily, teeth biting, tongue roaming without invitation. They couldn't possibly be further from making love right now, but she doesn't care, just wants to feel his body and his skin and him inside her. Nothing has ever felt this way, ever, and she's tired of always fighting it and doing the right thing. Thomas doesn't deserve this but not even that is enough to dim the way Harvey and her shine together.
She kisses him back with the same hunger, digging her fingers into his back and scraping the back of his head as she fists a handful of his hair.
He thrusts against her and she's completely ready to take him, her core throbbing wildly in anticipation, so she drags her palms down his chest as his hands cup her ass and press her to him. She reaches his pants and unbuttons them, pushing them and his boxers down enough to free his cock.
He hisses at the contact and she pumps him once, twice, feels him heavy and hot in her hand. As bad as she feels, there's also a wave of relief that hits her every time they do this, relief at the fact that this is real, it's not just a dream or a memory anymore. It's under the worst circumstances possible but it's them again, after so long, and it never stops feeling different than it is with everyone else.
He sucks on her earlobe as she spreads precum over his tip with her thumb and the room is swimming with sex and the smell of them and it's dizzying and heady. She lifts a leg, resting the sole of her heel firmly on the sink counter, and Harvey slides even closer to her. One hand takes a strong hold of her hip, one that she's mildly worried will leave a bruise she might have to explain, while the other bats her own away and takes hold of his cock, nudging her panties to the side and lining himself up at her entrance. She grabs his shoulders steadily and braces for the intrusion.
But he doesn't move.
Instead, his lips find her ear. "Tell him you're mine," Harvey half-whispers, the possessive grip of his hand on her hip and the dangerous, primal tone of his voice sending a thrill down her spine. Harvey is an imposing, aggressive man, but he's not dangerous and he'd never hurt her or overpower her in any way, but there's something about the way she feels completely dominated right now, even as she's scrambling to keep the upper hand, that's incredibly arousing in a way she never thought she'd feel.
"W-what?" she mumbles, slightly struggling to follow his line of thought.
"I said," he leans into her, effectively pinning her firmly against the wall, "Tell him you're mine."
Her center throbs again at that, but the part of her that can form a coherent thought finds his proposition absurd.
"That's ridiculous," she shakes her head, though it lacks a certain heat from the way it comes out breathy.
"Say it," he repeats, brushing the tip of his cock between her folds and Donna has to press her lips together to keep a whimper from slipping.
She remains stubbornly quiet, eyeing him in challenge once he pulls back to watch her. He works his jaw, clearly not giving in. And then he repeats, "Say it," as he pushes just the head of his cock inside her.
This time she can't contain her reaction as her lips fall open around a gasp. She's struggling to keep her eyes trained on his, defiance braving through the waves of arousal as she clings desperately to the last shreds of self-respect she can find.
Harvey is infuriatingly in control, despite the throbbing vein on his neck, a visible sign of his strain as he remains still, coaxing a response from her.
Her desire beats inside of her like a migraine and she wants to tell him to fuck off, to get off her, to leave and never touch her again, but he inches further into her, just a millimeter, and all she can do is bite her lip in defeat.
"I'm yours," she pants finally, and the second the words leave her mouth she knows they're true. This isn't some epiphany, some fairytale moment that will be the start of their new life together. But her words are true and maybe she didn't know it but her body clearly does.
"I'm yours," she whispers again, a bit more firmly this time, and Harvey finally sinks into her in one smooth stroke, his lips latching onto her neck again as he begins to thrust.
They were already on edge and their bodies are thrumming and vibrating together, every touch and kiss bringing them closer to the edge, and so he doesn't hold back. He drills into her and his rhythm is so thorough and deep that the foot that's still on the floor almost loses its footing, but his hands hold her steadily and dictate their pace.
Her back is sliding up and down the door, his low grunts hitting her ear in time with his moves, and she's completely beside herself. She rakes her nails down his back, moaning and whimpering as he hits every spot inside of her. They fit naturally, instinctively, like their bodies were made to be joined, and it feels like they just know what to do to drive each other mad.
"I'm yours, Harvey," she can't keep herself from gasping one last time, clutching his shoulders, and that seems to set something off inside of him because he reclaims her mouth and his hips become frantic. He sucks on her tongue, his lips moving smoothly and thoroughly as he explores and maps out every inch of her mouth, and she feels like she could just kiss him forever.
But then his hand snakes between them and buries itself inside her panties, stroking her folds and circling her clit and her hips thrust up sharply. Just a few expert strokes of his thumb have heat spreading down her limbs and a pressure coiling itself low in her belly. He keeps a steady rhythm, more controlled and merciful than the one his cock is dictating, but it somehow goes well together and soon enough her hips are bucking wildly.
She thanks the heavens that Harvey is strong and capable and seems to be aware of what's happening because at this point she is all feeling, all her thoughts and energy concentrically focused on the nearing release. She's moaning louder, almost too loud for the place they're in, and so she bites his shoulder as he pounds on, relentless and strong and so, so good she could cry.
He tightens his touch on her clit, pressing almost to the point of discomfort, and in a few more seconds she lets go, shutting her eyes tight and crying out his name as her whole body shudders. She blinks out for a second, doesn't even notice Harvey's still moving against her until he stops as well, grunting and spilling inside her.
They're silent for a long moment, just focused on the electric currents running through their veins as they work to catch their breath. Her leg that's still lifted on the counter is mildly cramping and his shirt is a mess and it's late but definitely not late enough to be sure that they're the only ones left, so they'll have to be careful.
She'd like sex with Harvey to feel special. To start with laughter and end with him pulling her naked body against his as he whispers a good night in her ear. She'd like it to be simple and fun and light, and to be as right on the outside as it feels on the inside. But they're not there yet - she's more and more convinced they may never be. And she likes Thomas, but she can only ever get this brand of feeling from Harvey, that much is clear.
She is his. Whether she likes it or not, whether they do something about it or not. And she can be his with him or without him, but she can't stop being. And so, no matter how sour the taste of his mouth in hers becomes afterwards, she keeps choosing the former.
Harvey finally pulls out and leans away, careful not to let her fall. He helps her leg back down and makes sure she's stable; in a rare and misplaced moment of tenderness, he straightens the skirt of her dress as she rearranges her bra.
They finish cleaning up and she can feel an actual migraine forming. She just wants to go home, down a glass of wine and take a shower to wash him off of her, though she suspects that the new visuals and sensations from tonight's dalliance might visit her in her dreams later.
Harvey's quiet, looking down as always while he readjusts his tie and runs his fingers through his hair a few times to tame it back into shape after she messed it up.
"This was nothing," she feels the need to state, not because she believes it - how could she, when she could see a supernova in his eyes, when his touch alone was lighting up a trail on her skin, when his kisses and his moans were all she'd been craving since the last time they did this - but because she needs a way to get back on top here. They're both messed up and they're both wrong but there's something about being fucked by Harvey - and not making love to him - that makes her feel like she's always just giving.
Harvey immediately stops his movements and looks up, fixing her with an intense stare that feels too much like he knows more than she's willing to let on.
"This is everything, Donna," he says simply, quietly, and it seems to sober them both up, because they lose whatever remaining fight they had within them. She agrees, but she can't really agree because agreeing would mean that having clandestine sex with Harvey in the firm bathroom is everything he's willing to give, and if she takes everything he's willing to give just like that, without standing her ground, without asking for the more she really wants, then what does that make her?
So she just swallows, turns around and unlocks the door, leaving him behind as she makes her way back to her office to retrieve her bag and go home.