Back in at last with a request by Guest (it would be nice if you used a name :) : Who has the worst past? (Also I've now read ToA and I hate that Piper and Jason broke up so in here IT HAS NOT HAPPENED I REFUSE)

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Who has the worst past?

"I can't really complain," Percy admits. "Sure I fought monsters and all, but so did all of you. I have a pretty decent family, apart from Gabe of course, but now he's gone. Even though there was that last part which wasn't too great."

Piper nods. "Always so modest Percy. My dad is - well, was - a super-rich, like, you-can't-even-realise-how-rich actor. I went on holiday to California, France, Florida, by private jet. I did feel out of place sometimes, but I think I had it pretty easy."

"I mean I kinda killed my own mother unintentionally and was manipulated my whole life by Hera or Juno or whatever you want to call her." Leo puts in. Both Jason and Percy glare.

"'Manipulated by Hera.'" Jason quotes.

"'Manipulated,'" Percy repeats, "'by Hera.'"

"Oof, Leo look what you've done." Thalia laughs as if she finds the imminent death of Leo Valdez a very amusing idea. "Now you've got the two most powerful demigods ever out for your blood."

He winces. You can literally read the time to run! expression on his face. He disappears in a puff of fire. There was the traditional smoke too, but mostly fire.

"My go." Jupiter's son grits his teeth. "My alcoholic mother brought me to the Wolf House when I was two, I lost trace of Thalia for years and years, I never even knew I had a sister! I trained and trained endlessly to become praetor, and then when I finally thought I'd reached the top Juno decided to mess my whole life up."

After a little silence, Thalia points to the scar on his lip, smiling widely. "You forgot about the eating a stapler part..."

Reyna laughs at Thalia's attempt to lighten the mood, but Jason interrupts. "Yes. Also, I died."

"Fair point," Annabeth says. "That was bad."

Piper violently nods. "Very bad."

Apollo suddenly appears. "Very very bad."

Jason agrees. "Not fun."

"Why is he even here?" Hazel seems puzzled. Nico looks away from his sister, and Jason's electric blue eyes dart to him briefly before he starts to whistle a little tune like he hasn't heard. Annabeth is starting to think something's up when...

Leo appears right there behind Jason - therefore risking his elfy, fiery, little life - and screeches right in his friend (who happens to want to violently murder him)'s ear. "VERY BAD!"

Jason jumps a mile into the air - literally.

"Where'd he go?" Percy's head is tipped back to look at the sky.

"I have no idea," Frank admits. "You want me to...?"

"Nah," Piper shook her head. "Anyway, Frank, your go."

"Well I guess I had a pretty normal life?" Frank begins hesitantly. "I mean, apart from, y'know, the 'life attached to a piece of firewood' thing. I guess Hera just likes to mess with us, right guys."

All the guys nod.

"Fuck Hera!" Thalia shouts from where she was standing with Reyna - those two do hang out a lot. "Also, fuck all the gods!"

"I think we all agree with Thalia on a... less extreme scale..." Hazel says.

"Oh no," Annabeth interrupts. "I 100% agree with Thalia."

"Same." Jason says.

"Agreed." Percy confirms.

"Fuck the gods," Reyna adds.

"FUCK THE GODS," Leo screams, "EXCEPT WITH FIRE BECAUSE THAT'S WAY COOLER!"

Frank shakes his head as Leo bursts into flames and starts to do a weird dance. "I think he's finally lost it."

"Nah bro," Jason says. "I really think he's always been like that."

"FIRE IS THE ANSWERRRRR!" Leo screeches, body flaming, holding his Tool Belt up to the sky. "HAHA THAT RHYMED! TOOL BELT IS ON FIRE! BLONDE SUPERMAN WILL YOU BURST INTO FLAMES WITH ME!"

Jason slowly backed away as a flaming Leo got down on one knee.

"If you... stop doing that, maybe we can get on with the question?" Annabeth suggests. "I'll go, then Hazel and Nico and Will. I was a normal kid and then I had a step-mother and step-siblings and my life got fucked. And then I met Luke and Thalia and my life was slightly unfucked, but it was still really fucked because in some ways it got fuckeder. No offence. And then ùy life was pretty much as fucked as Percy's."

"I was a normal kid, of course! You all know that!" Hazel smiled brightly. "Except I had a power to kinda get cursed precious stuff from the ground, of course. Also the fact that I was used to raise a giant by Gaia, who, by the way, was also kind of manipulating my mother? Then I died? I fell in love with Leo's grandfather which is just the weirdest thing ever. And the only thing my dad every gave me was a box of coloured pencils."

"Lucky you!" Luke screams from wherever he is. No one hears him.

"Fine, my turn." Nico says. "How fun."

Will makes a face, like he knows exactly how fun this is going to be.

"My sister died because of me. Yes, because of me!" He insisted at Percy's mumble of protest. "She was getting a Mythomagic figurine for me!

"My father overlooked me. My mother died. I spent seventy years in the Lotus Casino and came out in a totally different world." Nico took a large inhale and adds, "I went through... That horrible place."

Will put an arm around his boyfriend's shoulder. Percy, who, however grouchy he still felt not to be Nico's type, awwed along with Piper and everyone else - except for, of course, Jason, the secret Pernico fanboy in disguise.

"Um..." Will says. "I guess my life really wasn't that bad. I'm not going to compete against Nico. Ever. No one can."

"YEAH! FIRE!"

Everyone heaves a collective sigh. "He's not going to stop any time soon, is he?" Piper says.

"I think if he doesn't," Jason says, "he's gonna be the one with the most tragic past..."

Well, that took a while, and it wasn't the best, but whatever, review and all, hope ya liked it.

B

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~Queen Reyna aka Crystal