A fall crisp breeze swirled around her, sending a shiver through her entire body from head to toe. Her hands grasped at the leaves beneath her as she tried to hold on to something, anything that would prevent her from being swept out to sea. Gulping down air in between sobs only made her crave more oxygen. She was drowning.
The decimation of her soul was now complete. It was more than just the loss of her mother and grandfather that she suffered. Everyone she knew who had the answers that she so desperately needed were dead. All except one. Her heart grew cold with rage. Even as she sunk deeper into the rampant water, the plot for revenge was building up inside of her, replacing her loyalty and love for a man that had pulled her strings for the last time with murderous intentions and hate.
The light around her grew dim as everything around her turned into shadows. Deeper and deeper she fell into the abyss. If she wasn't screaming out of pure anger and despair, maybe she would have heard the loud steady voice that was trying to pull her out. She did however feel strong arms engulfing her and sensed that her body was being tugged up out of the frigid sea. But her eyes stung from the shock and she couldn't see, and her body only moved because someone was moving it for her.
She felt warm and safe wrapped in a cocoon of blankets. She was lying on a couch. Not hers though. It didn't feel like home. Prying one eye open and then the other, she saw concerned eyes staring back at her. It took a moment to focus on them to figure out who's they were.
"Ressler?" she groaned. She tried to sit up but felt dizzy. Firm hands pushed her back down.
"Hey," he whispered. "Better lay back down for a while. Geez, Liz, you scared the hell out of me."
"Why? What happened?" Her brain was foggy.
"You went into shock. You don't remember?"
Instantly it all came back to her. The nightmare of seeing Red pull the trigger and her mother crumple to the ground as the bullet penetrated her chest and the blood sprayed out.
"Oh my God, he killed my mother…" she bit back a sob and shivered.
Ressler reach out a hand and caressed her cheek. "I'm so sorry, Liz. I tried to get there in time…" he said with regret.
"HE KILLED MY MOTHER!" she said more forcefully, this time sitting up and tearing the blankets off her. She stood up and would have fallen over if not for Ressler grabbing her arms to steady her.
She refused to cry. How many times had Ressler held her while she cried her eyes out? She was done being the victim. He tried to pull her into a hug, but she refused his comfort. Pushing him away with a greater force than he realized she was ready for, she struggled to get to his front door.
"He killed my mother, and HE IS GOING TO PAY!" she screamed.
But he quickly caught up to her and grabbed her. "Liz, STOP. You aren't going anywhere!"
She fought him but he continued to hold on to her and would not let her go.
"Res, let me go! Let me go!" her arms got caught up as she continued to struggle against him.
He kept a firm stance and shook her to get her to look at him. "I am NOT going to let you do something stupid. You're going to get yourself killed, or at the very least sent to prison for the rest of your life."
She finally looked him in the eye. "LET. ME. GO," she seethed, as she stopped all movement and breathed heavily.
They stood there frozen, his hands with a firm grasp around her forearms, her hands gripping the middle of his shirt. Staring into each other's eyes, so many emotions passed between them.
"If you kill Red, have you thought about what it would do to Agnes? Or what it would do to me? I've already felt what it's like to lose you, and I'm not going through that again. I told you I wouldn't let you get swept out to sea, and I meant it. You said in so many words that you need me. Well maybe I need you too."
He took his chance and seized her mouth, devouring her lips in frenzied passion. She returned the kiss with equal fervor, and he possessively snaked his arms around her waist, pulling her tighter to him.
This moment was everything she wanted it to be until it wasn't. She abruptly pulled out of the kiss. "Don't manipulate me!" she accused as she pushed away from him. "If you think this is what's going to get me to stay, you're wrong."
"Oh, so you think I'm playing you…like you played me," he snapped.
Liz looked down feeling torn. "You know that's not what I meant to do…"
"No Liz, I DON"T know," he sternly replied, hurt.
"It's complicated Res, you know that!"
"No it's not. Not to me." He grabbed her hands and made her look him in the eyes. "What if I told you I love you? Would you think I'm playing then?"
His voice was low and tender, and the sincere look he gave her left her no reason to doubt him. She was speechless.
"I have for a long time," he continued.
"Res," she said breathless with watery eyes. "My life is such a mess right now. I NEED to find answers and I NEED to get justice. I can't-"
"Then let me help. We go in together to get Red, the RIGHT way."
She shook her head, not wanting his help, the tears once again threatening to fall. She was beat. She couldn't think straight anymore. The only thing she wanted to do right now was sleep.
Ressler noticed how tired she looked and backed down a bit. "Look, you're exhausted. You're staying here tonight and we'll talk more in the morning, ok? You can take my bed, I'll take the couch."
She glared at him as if that was last thing she wanted him to do.
"Yes," he countered her silent argument. "I'm taking the couch. Now go," he said firmly, pushing her toward his bedroom.
"Fine…" she said harshly. She relented, but only because she was about to fall asleep right where she stood.
Morning came quickly as Ressler awoke with a start, his back sore from the unsupportive cushions of the couch. He saw that his bedroom door was still closed. He would let her sleep as long as she needed.
He stretched out his arms and moved his back around a bit to get the kinks out. Then he stood up and went into the kitchen to make himself some coffee but was startled when he saw a note taped to the refrigerator.
I love you too.
"Dammit!" he exclaimed as he ran to his bedroom. Throwing the door open, he saw that the bed was neatly made and the room was empty.