Whispers
For: Lord Divestre Croft
Prompt: Hospital accident
Summary: There are things in this world that you cannot believe will happen until they happen.
She doesn't know where she is, quick flashes of recent memories overwhelming her brain. She's moving, but her body lies still, watching lights and ceiling tiles above her flash by quickly. The right side of her head hurts, and she can remember passing out, but not why. She can't remember what happened. Had she been taking orders? Or was it something with the children…
And then it hits her, where she is, and panic stirs through her weary bones.
She is on a gurney, pushed through the busy halls of a hospital by nurses and doctors, talking too fast. The picture is slightly blurred, coming slowly into focus with words she doesn't understand.
"…Epidural hematoma…lucid interval yet?"
"We don't…" the nurse cuts off, looking down, "Hon, Ms. Lockhart? Can you hear me?"
She nods her head weakly, her bones aching and she squeezes her fingers, flexing her arm. What was it that hit her?
The nurse is talking again, "I need you to stay awake, okay?"
She nods her head again, wincing but not missing the grim look passed between nurse and doctor. Her eyes roam across her body, catching tiny little cuts around her arms, little bloody nicks. She frowns. She cannot move her arm.
"We need to get her into—
"The neurosurgeon isn't here yet—
"If it ends soon, she'll die—
"I know, but we don't know how long it will last—
She winces, her head pounding, "…children?" her breath is short, she has to gasp, "…Cloud…?"
"What, Ms. Lockhart? Ms. Lockhart? Ms. Lockhart—
"Tifa? Tifa!"
She believes in him, she really does…but he isn't there. She wishes he was there, so she could tell him, and see him.
The bar is dark and quiet as he pulls in, flicking Fenrir off in a smooth motion. He dismounts, moving quickly towards the door. They were not expecting him so early, and it wouldn't surprise him if Tifa closed the bar early to take the kids out for ice cream.
The door is unlocked, and he shrugs it off, moving towards the steps. By now, there should've been little feet running down the steps, there should be Tifa cooking in the kitchen with a full bar. Now that he thinks about it, it is a Friday night, and it should be busier. Course, it seems Tifa has gone out forgetting to lock the door. It isn't like her, but he shrugs it off. She has called him a worry wart before, the way he acts paranoid about the ruffians of the bar. She laughs at him a lot, startled by his sudden movements when one gets too close to her or too loud. He has a habit of forgetting her strength in these situations.
She reminded him the other night when she tossed out a disgruntled man after he groped her…lower backside.
He sighs, moving to take a shower, but his cell phone rings. He contemplates ignoring it; it may be another delivery, and he doesn't want to go back out. Then he realizes it is the annoying tune Yuffie picked out for her personal ring on his phone.
He sighs; if he doesn't answer it, she'll just keep calling and calling. He would just ignore it, but he still hasn't figured out how to change the ring tone back, and it's just so damn annoying.
He scoops it up off of his desk, moving downstairs to try and find something to eat while Yuffie rants.
"Hello?"
"Where the hell have you been?!"
"What?"
"You haven't answered your p-phone! And…and I-I-I've been trying to reach you!"
He sighs, moving towards the kitchen.
"Listen to me for once, Cloud! You have to get here, now!"
He narrows his eyes, "What, Wutai?"
"NO! It's—"
He enters the kitchen, stops dead in his tracks. There is glass across the floor behind the island, tiny little pieces that spread across the entire expanse. Little flecks of blood are traced across the tiles as well, an overturned footstool near the island.
There's blood on the corner of the counter, and his heart stops cold.
"—Tifa! She's in the hospital!"
xxx
He stumbles through the emergency room doors, legs still shaking after the wild ride over. His breath is heavy, and his eyes scan the packed room full of people suffering from all sorts of ailments.
But there is no Tifa, nor does he see the children.
He does not ask where she is, merely forges on through the mad crowd, pushing past people and down hallways. There is a gurney up ahead, doctors and nurses swarming around it. It is being pushed further away from the hall, and he sees long, dark hair trailing from it.
His heart stops again.
It's about to turn the corner, and he rushes, runs to catch up with it, to see her before she disappears behind the mad rush of scrubs and medical jackets.
Then there is a man, and a nurse stopping him, uttering some nonsense about how he can't be back here…this is restricted personal only.
The gurney is turning right now at the corner, a space between the doctors. He catches sight of a pale, bruised face, and eyes.
"Tifa?" he whispers, "Tifa!"
Her red eyes lock onto his blue ones in a single second.
Her eyelids slowly close shut.
There is panic around the gurney, and it is disappearing around the corner.
He elbows the man in the gut.
She has seen him, or a phantom of him, for a moment in time. She believes in him, he will be there before it is too late. It may be too late, but she won't believe that, because she can still hear him.
She is sleeping, and has not woken in three days. He will not let the children see her; he won't let anyone see her.
He doesn't like it in the ICU. There is a ventilator hooked up, and monitors for her heart, blood pressure, and the pressure inside her head; the thing that almost killed her. There are bandages around her head. It had been shaved so they could operate, and he knows when she wakes she will not be pleased about this. It is a small price to pay, though, in comparison to her life.
There are tubes hooked into the inside of her wrist, and the hospital room is loud and noisy. He cannot rest here, but he cannot rest anywhere else, either, knowing she is this way. He feels overwhelmed, stressed, and despite the many protests of his friends, will not leave her side unless absolutely necessary.
He wraps his hand around hers.
She has not woken up in three days.
He believes in her, but he fears she will never wake, that the things he whispers to her as she sleeps he will never have the chance again to tell her when she is awake.
Today they drug him away from her bedside for three hours. He has been antsy to return ever since. She has not woken up in five days.
He hurts…he hurts all over because he can tell her everything he's ever wished to tell her before, but it's on her deathbed. He's ashamed of himself for never saying anything before, for never believing that she could be hurt in such a way that he would never hear her voice again.
It is more than just loneliness, and being worried. He feels as if he should be blamed, and he regrets never telling her anything. The doctors think that she may wake soon.
She has not woken up in five days.
"They tell me I need to go home and see the children, tell them how you are. What am I suppose to say? I finally let the others see you yesterday. I know it was selfish to hold them back, but it's my fault. I have to take care of you, and I won't let the children see you, not until you wake up. So wake up, so you can hear their voices again, and see their faces. Marlene wants to hug you."
"I want to think it isn't too late for you…for me…and for us. I'm scared Tifa…I can't remember the last time I was scared like this. I can't remember the last time I talked so much…I know you want me to talk more, so I'll keep talking if you promise to wake up, Tifa. I'll tell you everything you wanted to know…everything… I remember you asked me once what was the worst experience I had ever had was, whether it be Sephiroth, and mako, and…Zack, and Aeris. You have not woken up in a week, Tifa and it has been the worst week of my life…This has been the worst experience of my life."
"The others are telling me things about you I didn't know…that time I spent away from you when I had Geostigma…they tell me stories about things you did, and things the children did. I like hearing them…and I wish I could've been there to experience them. I'm sorry I walked out on you, I am. I don't think I ever really told you I was sorry. And I'm sorry I can't explain this to you in person…it's hard…because I don't want to see you disappointed in me, and I feel like you were so close to it that night when the children were taken. I feel…I feel that I had come the closest to failing you as I had since that night at the reactor when you almost died. I want you to be proud of me, Tifa…I want to feel like I did something right in your eyes…and I know you'd say that I have…but I want to believe that myself, too…"
"I want you to wake up, so I can see if I have the courage to tell you all this."
"Tifa…I…want you…to know something…"
She's scared when she wakes up…scared and confused because there are tubes hanging from her wrists, and around her face. She feels her heart beat faster, and a machine beeps in time with it, and it only serves to frighten her more. There is panic building in her chest, and she's about to rip the tubes from her body and run from the strange surroundings when she spots something familiar. Even in the darkness of the room she recognizes the blonde mess of hair.
He's pulled a chair up beside of her bed, bent over onto the bed beside her hip, head pillowed on one hand, the other resting on her leg. He looks peaceful sleeping, but there are heavy bags beneath his eyes, and he looks malnourished, thin and pale.
She lifts a hand hesitantly, twisted and tangled in tubes, and runs her fingers through the soft locks.
He jerks, sitting up quickly, eyes blinking rapidly to take in surroundings. He meets her eyes and he looks about as confused as she felt a moment ago. His lips separate in disbelief, and she still cannot remember how she got here.
She does remember some things, though.
"Tifa…?"
She looks into his eyes, lucid and calm for the first time since waking and she clears her throat before speaking hoarsely.
"You said you loved me."
A/N: That was long, and I actually researched some of this stuff...it's a real occurence...but yeah, this is it! I hope you all enjoy it! Thanks for reviews, loves!