Chapter Seven
Miller paces outside of med bay. As he paces, he looks through the clear door, but there's never much to see. If he cranes his head, he can see exactly what he's seen for the past 45 minutes. Jackson and Kane each on a bed, hooked up to machines, oxygen tubes near their noses. Abby and Clarke fussing over them, Abby looking as though she hasn't slept for a day. Jaha's there too, still unconscious. The word is that although he's relatively stable for now, he is going to need another operation on his intestines once his vital signs are better.
There are two other people inside med bay as well. One is Ben, the Ark's #2 in the hydrofarm. The other is Major Costa. Miller observes Clarke somehow simultaneously tending to the patients and speaking with both Ben and Costa. He once again wonders at Clarke's ability to balance so much.
"Hey," Bellamy walks up to Miller. "How are things?" He puts a hand on Miller's shoulder.
"No change. Not that I can see," Miller says. He takes his eyes off med bay and looks at Bellamy. "I can't remember the schedule. Am I supposed to be on duty now?"
"No, you're fine. You're supposed to go on duty in two hours, but we got it covered." Bellamy pauses. "You okay?"
"Yeah," Miller answers quickly. "Yeah, yeah, I'll be fine." He forces a smile. "Abby and Clarke will work their magic."
"They always do."
A moment later, the door to med bay opens, and Clarke exits followed by Major Costa. She looks first at the Major and then at Bellamy. "Bellamy, please accompany Major Costa and arrest Kara Cooper. We do believe that Kane and Jackson were poisoned."
"Cooper had the means and the motivation," Costa adds.
"How did she do it?" Bellamy asks.
"Ben tells us that algae strains can be poisonous," Clarke says. "And with Cooper working breakfast duty, she easily could've slipped something into two nutrition bars. And she was the one handing people their plates."
Miller takes a breath. He has suspected as much, but now it's confirmed. "So I thought I was helping Jacks by giving him part of my breakfast. But the poison was meant for me."
"That's our theory," Clarke says. "That Cooper was out to get the chancellor who made the final decision about who to keep…and the person who benefitted from that decision over her husband." Her voice turns more tender and she takes a step closer to Miller. "We've started dialysis on Jackson and Kane. We'll keep you posted."
Miller nods. Bellamy asks, "Can you give us any sort of prognosis?"
"Not now," Clarke says. "It's just too soon. Let's see what happens after dialysis."
Miller watches Bellamy and Costa head out to arrest Cooper. He knows he should feel infuriated with her, and he does but his mind is taken up mostly with worry over Jackson – and guilt for inadvertently giving him the poisoned food.
"Wow," Octavia murmurs.
For a second she doesn't realize that she's spoken out loud. But Niylah giggles, clearly amused by Octavia's state.
"Ready for more?" Niylah asks, her voice sounding mischievous.
"I'm exhausted!" Octavia exclaims. She laughs, "And you know that."
"I do," Niylah smiles. "It was fun trying to wear you out."
"You succeeded!"
The two women are snuggled together atop Octavia's bed, Octavia on her back and Niylah on her side. Octavia is sweaty, pleasantly exhausted, and savoring the fact that she hasn't felt this good physically in a long time. She could use a drink of water but isn't about to break out of this position. She reaches a hand to stroke Niylah's hair.
"It's pretty," Octavia says, her voice throaty. "Your hair. Makes me think of sunshine."
"Yours is beautiful as well. I've always found brunettes so….beguiling."
Octavia slowly ceases her stroking and relaxes back against the pillow. "Niylah," she begins, "was this wrong? Did I take advantage of you?"
"I thought we agreed that neither one of us owes the other," Niylah says thoughtfully.
"We did," Octavia says, looking back up at the ceiling. "I just wanted to make sure you still felt that way."
"We decided that we are two women trying to survive this crazy world, that we'd leave it at that." Niylah pauses, propping her head up with a hand so she can gaze at Octavia. "And if this makes it a bit easier to survive, then so be it."
"Good. Because right now I don't want to leave this bed."
"Too much worrying and thinking never helps." Niylah is quiet for several moments. She then says, "I meant what I said earlier though. Clarke and Abby could probably use my help."
Octavia's voice is stronger and more resolute than Niylah's. "I meant what I said as well. I won't let you." She then adds, "I'll check with Bellamy. For all we know things are under control in med bay. Maybe they don't need you now."
Bellamy radios Clarke that it's done, Cooper has been placed inside the brig. He then returns to med bay and peers through the door. He's surprised when Clarke steps out after a minute.
"How are things?" he asks.
"No change to Kane or Jackson," Clarke says, looking back through the door. "But we're worried about Jaha. We need to do that surgery soon, though we still don't like his vital signs." She takes a breath. "You and me and my mom are the only members of the Council who are…not unconscious. We need to tell people something."
Bellamy nods. "There's some talk in the hallways. Not too bad from what Raven and the others tell me. Mostly people are concerned about Kane and Jackson." He tilts his head. "I can make an announcement that Cooper's been arrested and share the charges against her. And that she's going to stay in the brig until the situation in med bay is under more control. I think that's reasonable."
"I agree. Plus it would help reassure people that it's not anything like…an airborne illness or something they can catch. It's poison." She adds, "Although people might never want to eat algae again! But we can work with Ben about what to say about that and how to make sure the algae is safe going forward."
"I'll talk to him." Bellamy puts a hand on her shoulder. He feels comfortable making physical contact with Clarke, and the look in her eyes right now tells him that she likely welcomes the touch. "How are you?" Bellamy asks softly. "I have what's left of your breakfast. Though to be safe we disposed of anything that had algae in it."
"I'm fine," Clarke says. There is a tenderness and even a vulnerability to her voice that touches Bellamy. "Maybe ask Octavia if she wants the rest of it. I promise I'll eat dinner tonight but I'm just not hungry now; there's so much to do." She lowers her voice. "And we know Octavia needs to feed two people."
Bellamy nods. "I'll offer it to her." He smiles and meets her eyes, "But I'm holding you to what you just said. You have to eat dinner."
Clarke returns his smile. "You're taking good care of the future mother of your child."
Bellamy knows his mouth has opened, and he almost wants to stagger backwards but he stops himself. It just fills him with awe to hear Clarke speak those words. Not that he has ever seen her as someone who needs to be taken care of. "You-you always take such good care of me," he manages.
"Thank you for agreeing to do this with me. Life is…short and scary. There's no one I'd rather parent with than you."
"Same," Bellamy says, and then he's surprised again as Clarke pulls him into a hug. The hug feels just heavenly, Bellamy thinks, for lack of a better word.
He dearly hopes they win one of the three spots in the lottery. He has to admit that his hopes are sky-high, but there is no guarantee that they will get a spot.
They step out of the hug when they hear footsteps. It's Octavia.
"Hey," Octavia says. "I just wanted to check on things. How are our patients?"
Clarke gives an update and ends with, "I should go back in there now. And force my mom to take a break at some point. She's so worried about Kane."
Octavia's eyes dart around, even glancing at the floor, as she says, "I bet you wish you had someone else with medical skills to join you."
Bellamy instantly detects how wooden and foreign the sentence sounds. He looks from Octavia to Clarke and surmises that all three of them are on the same page.
"Yeah," Clarke says. With a first nod she adds, "But we have it under control. We'll manage." She adds, pointedly, "No need for anything drastic."
Octavia nods, and again Bellamy guesses that the three of them have a tacit understanding.
"Good," Octavia says.
And with that, Clarke returns to med bay, and Bellamy heads out to update Skaikru on Cooper's arrest.
By the time dinner rolls around, Miller has no appetite. He looks around their table and it's half empty. Jackson, Jaha, and Kane are still patients in med bay. Clarke is at the table now alongside Miller, Bellamy, Raven, and Octavia but she's leaving soon. "I'm taking this to my mother," she says, gesturing at a plate, "and once she's done resting we're going to operate on Jaha. We're feeling that it's now or never."
Miller nods mutely. He has been getting updates on Jackson all day, but the updates are always the same. Jackson and Kane are still unconscious. Clarke has admitted that their vital signs are "not great" but stable. Jaha is the one who Clarke and Abby are worried about, so Miller is not surprised to hear Clarke say that it's "now or never" for his surgery.
Miller looks down at his stew and stirs it with his spoon. A few people approach their table with questions for Bellamy, and Miller listens, glad to have a distraction. None of the questions are urgent or even that important, but Bellamy is more or less acting-chancellor now given that every other member of the Council is in med bay. Miller notes that Bellamy's doing a great job with their questions, though he's not surprised at that.
"What do you think will happen with Cooper?" Raven asks a bit later on.
Miller still hasn't taken more than a few bites of stew but he's eager to hear the discussion. He reminds himself that it might help take his mind off of Jackson's predicament.
"I would say there'll be a trial once the Council is back," Bellamy says. "The evidence against her is pretty overwhelming. Major Costa also taped some of the things she said when she was taken into custody and a lot of it was…incriminating."
"Does she get floated after that?" Octavia asks.
Miller looks at her. He knows that once the stations landed on the ground, Skaikru no longer treated all crimes as capital crimes. He's not sure if they ever laid out expected punishments for various crimes though.
"It's possible." Bellamy takes a breath. "Murder is serious business."
Miller is jolted at Bellamy's words, and Bellamy quickly amends his statement. "Attempted murder, sorry. Sorry. Attempted murder."
Miller exhales. He wants to smile but he can't force it. "The guilt," Miller says, shaking his head. "When I'm not scared to death that he's not going to wake up, I feel horrible that he only ate the damn thing because I offered it to him!"
Octavia reaches out and places her hand over Miller's. "What do you think Jackson would say? If he was here?"
Miller is taken aback at her gesture for a second. He's always been friendly with Octavia – well, "always" despite a Jobi nut incident between the two of them in their early days – but her tenderness here is perhaps a bit unusual. He looks at her again and wonders if he detects something in her eyes that he hasn't seen before.
"Oh, you know what he'd say," Miller says, and this time his smile is sincere. "He'd say don't worry about it, my heart was in the right place, that I was right and he did need to eat more. He…" Miller breaks off because he doesn't want to cry and he's about to. He guesses the others can see that he's about to lose it. Bellamy is somehow right there, with a hand on his back.
"Hey, if you want to skip the after-dinner movie and read me one of your stories, I'm down for that," Octavia says.
"Me too," Bellamy adds. "Besides, the movie is 'Blood Giant'." It's a movie made shortly before the first apocalypse. It did not stand the test of time, and no one seems to like it.
"Any of your stories is 100 times better than that," Raven says firmly.
Miller looks around the table and again smiles sincerely. It's been brutal since Jackson was poisoned, with every minute feeling more like an hour, but his friends are helping him get through it.
Bellamy is woken up by a knock on his door. He glances at the time as he rubs his eyes, and is jolted when he sees it's only 0300 hours. If someone is knocking at three in the morning, it cannot be good. "Come in!" he calls out, as he sits up.
It's Clarke.
"Clarke!" he says, springing from the bed. "Are you okay? Did…?"
She looks terrible. She may even have been crying.
"We lost him," Clarke says, her voice near a whisper. "Jaha. On the operating table."
She is collapsing into his arms and he's holding her. He brings one of his hands to the back of her head and tries to soothingly stroke her. He murmurs a few soothing words like 'It's okay."
"What about Kane and Jackson?" Bellamy asks, after a bit.
"No change," Clarke manages. She is still clutching Bellamy tightly.
They remain that way for many long moments. She is trembling slightly and Bellamy wonders if she's trying to stifle tears. He has to fight his own guilt. He's the one who shot Jaha over a year ago, messing up his intestines.
"You can let it out," he says after a bit. "If you need to cry, then cry."
He's not sure how long they remain holding each other. At some point they find it easier to sit – Clarke might've said her legs felt weak – and they move their hug to the bed. Her head is on his shoulder as she keeps grasping onto him. He loves feeling her warmth against him. His heart aches for what she's going through.
"It's funny," Clarke says at one point. "I wasn't all that attached to Jaha," she says, letting out a bemused grunt. "Sometimes it was hard to look at him and to see Wells' face." She sniffs and continues, "But…just loosing a patient. In the middle of surgery."
"I'm sorry that I never got to really know Wells. Instead I spent the few days I knew him….at odds." He pauses. "How's your mom taking it?" Bellamy asks quietly.
"I basically made her take a sedative," Clarke says, again with something of a bemused smirk. "She's mentally and physically exhausted. And Kane and Jackson don't look likely to wake up anytime soon." At last she leans out of the hug. She wipes the side of her face. "But I should go back to med bay."
"You just left med bay," Bellamy begins softly. "Don't you need rest too? I'm not a doctor, but what if I went there? I could call you if any machines start beeping or if anyone starts waking up?"
"I-I don't know…"
"Please let me. I swear I'll radio if things look the least bit off." He keeps his voice as firm as he can make it.
Clarke agrees to Bellamy's plan. He knows the fact that she doesn't argue means that she is beyond exhausted. She takes his hand as they walk to her room. Bellamy checks her radio to make sure it's functioning, and she gives him one last hug before lowering herself to the bed. He stays for just a second longer, feeling relieved at the sight of her gathering the covers about herself.
Bellamy then heads to med bay. He takes a seat in between Kane and Jackson's beds and holds onto his radio.
It was hard seeing Clarke so drained, Bellamy knows. But he's honored that she went to him. He takes a breath and tries to process all of his emotions. Guilt over shooting Jaha is still there even though he knows he was a different man then. And as much as he wishes he didn't have the thought right now, a part of him does remind himself that Jaha's death could mean even less chance of harm coming to Octavia and Niylah should their scheme ever be discovered. Skaikru's official population is down to 99 now.
Ever since Octavia had to get out of bed and go about her day, Niylah has wondered what would come next. Octavia had seemed to truly enjoy every minute of their lovemaking.
Niylah certainly had. After months of spending all day inside one room, having sex with Octavia was thrilling and pleasurable. Niylah loves to give, loves to use every part of herself to help satiate someone else.
And this someone else was Octavia. The girl under the floor, the Skaikru warrior, Indra's second. The brave, stunning, fearless, determined young woman. And yes, also the only reason Niylah is alive right now.
Niylah is no foolish virgin set to fall for the first woman who pays attention to her. She's not naïve enough to fall for any or every woman who allows her into her bed. But Octavia is extraordinary in every way, Niylah thinks. She was honored to make love to her and would do it again and again if Octavia wants it. Using her hands and her mouth all over Octavia's body was simply an exquisite experience. Niylah is replaying every moment of the sumptuous experience and wondering what Octavia thinks, how she feels now that she's had some time to think about what happened.
Time moves slowly as Niylah waits inside the room. Octavia has told her that today she has a mandatory janitorial shift, then she has time booked with Ben and the farms, and after that she has scheduled training time with Sepetys and a few other young guards. Niylah grabs the last sheet of paper Octavia was able to procure and continues to slowly doodle. When there is no longer an iota of free space on the paper, Niylah decides to meditate again today. She certainly has had more time during the past six months to perform Trikru prayers and meditations than ever before in her life.
At long last, the door opens and Octavia has returned. Niylah climbs out of the hiding spot. Her heart is beating just a bit too insistently and she wonders what she will see. What will Octavia say? Will Octavia view their encounter as a one-time thing?
She doesn't have to wonder too long. Octavia is grinning and saying, "Hi. I missed you."
"Missed you too."
Octavia pulls Niylah into her arms and gives her a deep, passionate kiss.
A couple of days go by and the business of running Skaikru continues.
As Clarke and Abby catch up on a bit of sleep, Bellamy announces Jaha's death to the group and the fact that they will fill his seat on the Council. He asks every member of Skaikru to think about whether or not they want to run for the seat. He says they will hold the election in two weeks, in order to allow people to consider whether or not they want to run, and in the hopes that Kane will emerge from his coma by then.
Bellamy also informs Skaikru that once they have a full Council again, they will begin Kara Cooper's trial. She will continue to be held inside the brig. Ben briefly addresses the group too and reassures them that the hydrofarm is running smoothly, and that his apprentices are continuing to perform well. They are not worried about the food supply. He talks about the safety protocols they have in place to ensure no more poisoned algae.
A brief memorial service is held for Jaha. Abby, Bellamy, and Clarke debated whether or not to wait for Kane to reawaken but decided to move forward. They just don't know when – or if – Kane and Jackson will emerge from their comas. Jaha's body will later be incinerated.
Miller sits through the memorial a bit glassy-eyed. He alternates between trying to tune it out and trying to be present. He tries to make himself breathe. Octavia sits next to him and holds his hand at one point.
Is this it? Are we gonna be back here tomorrow or next week for Jackson's memorial? Or is he gonna stay in that coma forever? It's been two days now. Forty-eight full hours since he ate that poison that was meant for me.
Was I fucking crazy to let myself fall in love again in this world where people just keep dying?
When the service is over, he returns to med bay. When Miller's not on duty, Clarke and Abby have been allowing him to sit inside med bay, holding Jackson's hand and talking to him. Clarke has told him that it's fully possible that Jackson can hear him, on some level.
It's hard. Holding Jackson's limp hand. Looking at his face, his eyes closed, breathing tube at his nose, IV line in his other arm. His hair is a bit askew so Miller reaches a hand and combs it with his fingers. The corners of Miller's lips turn up. Jackson's hairline is starting to recede a bit, and Miller knows his own hairline has been doing the same. He knows it's normal but he has to wonder how much of it was caused by the stress of the past year.
Abby comes up behind him and puts a hand on Miller's shoulder. "Go to bed, Nathan," she says. "Get some sleep."
"I can't. My bed's too big."
"Try anyway. I'll radio you if anything changes."
Miller nods and stands up. Something about Abby Griffin is – well, just like Clarke. She must be obeyed. He ensures his radio is attached to his belt and goes. The walk to his room is lonely and solemn.
Miller wasn't lying though. The bed has felt enormous ever since Jackson fell ill. He lies on his back, staring at the ceiling for far too long.
But somehow, somewhere along the way he must have drifted off. Vaguely he hears static and the voice of Clarke Griffin. As he reaches for his radio, he thinks that she has perhaps been trying to reach him for a little while. "Miller! Miller come in!"
"Sorry….uh, Miller here," he manages, pressing the button.
"Jackson's awake!"
Miller bolts out of his room and down the hallway, not bothering to put shoes on, not caring that he's clad in boxer shorts, a T-shirt, and socks. He ignores the look of the guard walking the halls as he continues to scramble towards med bay.
And then, moments later, he's holding him. Jackson is weak and Miller is careful to cradle him gently. "Hey, baby," Jackson manages, his voice faint.
"Hey. You gave us a scare," Miller says. He is trembling with relief and joy.
Kane follows about six hours after Jackson. Both men spend a day or so feeling groggy and ill, but they go on to make a full recovery.
Raven decides to run for Jaha's old seat on the Council. Two others, one of whom is Major Costa, also run for the seat but Raven wins the election by a decent margin. Her friends celebrate with her; they don't have many conventional party trappings but they toast her with their water, and Bellamy and Miller offer to carry her around on their shoulders for a spell. (Raven declines).
Once the Council is back up to five members, they turn their attention to Kara Cooper's trial. It's brief. The evidence is damning, and Costa has her on tape speaking words that leave little doubt that she is guilty of attempted murder as well as tampering with the food supply.
With a guilty verdict in Cooper's case, the Council sits inside the meeting room to determine her punishment.
"She's guilty of two counts of attempted murder and tampering with the food supply," Kane begins. "There's a strong case for capital punishment."
"The human race is down to 99 people though," Bellamy says. "I can't say that I'm eager to conduct an execution."
"Well, no one is," Clarke says. Her voice is gentle and grave. "But this is really serious. The crimes are bad enough on their own, but especially now…attempted murder when humanity is down to 99 people."
"And tampering with our food supply when our food supply is absolutely critical," Raven adds. "We can't exactly go outside and forage for more."
"Still though," Abby speaks up, "the idea of conducting an execution feels wrong to me. So many of our people have already died."
"Keeping Cooper alive would mean wasting food on an attempted murderer though," Clarke says quietly.
"What if we sentence her to life imprisonment instead?" Bellamy asks. "That way we'd accomplish three things. We'd keep her from being able to harm anyone else. We'd punish her – since a lifetime in the brig has to be almost as bad as death. And it would serve as a deterrent to others." He pauses and adds, "We could also reduce her rations. She won't need as many calories if she's spending all day in the brig. And – well, that would also certainly serve as punishment." His voice is forceful but calm.
Clarke looks at Bellamy and tilts her head. "I came in here thinking that putting Cooper to death was the just decision. But you make a lot of good points."
The Council continues to discuss the issue more and they ultimately agree with Bellamy's proposal. When the meeting is concluded, Clarke and Bellamy remain inside the room together.
"You were very persuasive," Clarke says.
The past few days, taken up with the trial and sentencing, have not been easy ones and Bellamy notes that Clarke looks as weary as he himself must look.
Clarke continues, "You made your points really well. You….you do a good job thinking with both your heart and your head."
"Thank you. You too," he says sincerely. "And hey," he says, gently placing a hand on her arm, "I know we didn't go in there agreeing. But….you seem okay with that." He takes a breath. "I was thinking that if we're lucky enough to become parents, we won't always agree either."
Clarke nods. "You're right. I'm glad we handled disagreeing well today." She smiles and shakes her head, "Because despite all the planning and discussing we've been doing, we're bound to disagree on 100 other things when we have this kid. If we have this kid," she corrects herself.
"Let's hope it is when and not if."
And then suddenly it's 48 hours until the day of the lottery. The lottery to determine which three couples will be chosen to become parents. As of right now, four couples total have declared that they want to enter the lottery. Clarke and Bellamy are one of the couples. Four couples entering the lottery to win three available spots.
Clarke and Bellamy have casually been speaking with other people during the past few weeks, trying to gage if anyone else will declare their intent to enter the lottery. No one else seems to feel that it's the right time in their life yet, so it's looking like the lottery will result in three happy couples and one having to wait and hope for next year.
Bellamy and Clarke are in the gym, playing a rather tame game of soccer with Octavia and two members of the guard. Raven is sitting off to the side, trying to repair a gadget. Abby is there too, sitting next to Raven, mending an old garment, chatting with Raven, and cheering on Clarke.
The game wraps up, and Bellamy reaches for a towel to mop his brow. Clarke comes up to him, says "Good game", and her hand lingers on his back as she says the words. He grins back at her. "You too," he says.
Cadet Sepetys then enters the gym. Her eyes seem to scan the room as soon as she steps through it. Bellamy takes note of her entrance right away. Sepetys and her friend Aaron are one of the four couples who have said they will enter the lottery.
"Hey," Sepetys begins, a nervous smile on her face. "Uh, I see we have four of the five members of the Council here."
"Yes," Abby says, putting her sewing aside and standing up. "Is something wrong, Cadet?"
"No," the young woman answers simply. She looks from Clarke to Bellamy to Raven to Abby. "I just wanted to let you know that Aaron and I won't be entering the lottery after all. We had a good, long talk and we decided we're just not ready." She pauses. "Maybe next year. Or the year after."
"Okay," Clarke says. Her voice sounds professional. "We'll make a note of it."
Sepetys nods and leaves the gym.
Bellamy's heart pounds. He looks at Clarke. She's breaking out in a grin and he can't help but to mirror it. He reaches for her as she reaches for him. As they hug, Bellamy is dimly aware that Abby and Octavia are standing off to the side, both smiling broadly as well.
A lot can happen in the next 48 hours. Another woman or couple might step forward. Sepetys and Aaron might change their minds again.
But if nothing changes then Clarke and Bellamy are assured one of the three spots. They will be allowed to try to have a baby.
"Can we just move up the lottery to right now?" Octavia asks. She sounds pretty much as eager to have a niece or nephew as Abby is to have a grandchild. "Can we just make an announcement at dinner and ask if anyone objects?"
"It's tempting, O," Bellamy says. He and Clarke are still hugging. "It's tempting."
TBC