Chapter Three
I open the doors into the warm Angeles air, it's so much lovelier here than Carolina. I have missed it. I see Maxon sitting on one of the benches, looking out onto the dimly lit gardens. I slowly walk towards him, my heart racing. He's dressed in a lose shirt and his suit pants, the sleeves of his shirt are rolled up showing his strong forearms. I can't help but think of how attractive he looks.
"I thought I'd find you here." I say softly as I sit beside him, looking out onto the gardens. He smiles and looks at his lap.
"It's so good to see you again America." He smiles.
"It's good to see you as well. You and Kriss look good together."
He scoffs, "Right."
"What?"
"Nothing. Tell me what you've been up to." He asks.
"Nothing worthy of reporting. Mom and May and Gerard moved into this sweet cottage in the countryside, she has managed to cope after my father's death. Although I see a sadness in her now that never used to be there. Jackson and I moved into our house, it's really lovely. There are some amazing gardens I like to sit in and read, sometimes I play my violin out there for some peace." I explain.
"Ah yes, I remember you are an extraordinary violin player." He grins, I blush at the compliment.
"Thank you, I'll have to play here again for everyone."
"I'd like that. I'm glad to hear your mother and family are well. When your father passed, i was so worried about them, as well as you. And your husband? He treats you well?"
"Fiancé," I correct, "and yes he does. He's a great man. It took me a while to trust him considering your father chose him for me. I don't understand why he chose mine and the other girls got to choose who they fell in love with." I wonder, looking at him for any clues but Maxon stays clammed up. He shrugs.
"You know how my father was about you. He wanted to make sure you wouldn't come back and convince me to run away with you or something."
I chuckle, prompting a grin from Maxon too.
"I suppose so. I'm different now, I think. Less fiery."
Maxon looks at me now, his eyes lock with mine. He seems sad.
"That's a shame, it was one of the things I loved about you." He doesn't break my gaze.
"Loved?" I question, thinking he had made a mistake. He just nods. "Tell me about you and Kriss then." I know what I hear will hurt me, but like my mother said, perhaps the closure is exactly what Maxon and I need. If he even has any affections for me left.
"There's not much to tell. We were married, and now we live in the palace." He shugs.
"So, you and she have… been intimate?" I ask but regret it as soon as I do. He looks at me with a shocked expression.
"That's a bit personal."
"I'm sorry." There's an awkward pause.
"But yes." I feel my stomach knot, I press my hands together tightly. "What?"
"What? I didn't speak." I try to avoid his gorgeous eyes.
"You didn't have to America. You and Jackson haven't?" He asks. Now who's getting personal too.
"I always thought it would be Aspen, or even you. I can't bring myself to, and besides we aren't even married! It's against the law." I explain. The truth is I don't want to be so vulnerable with someone I cannot open up to. My heart is so guarded now after Aspen and Maxon both hurt me, I don't feel I can ever really love again.
"I see." Is all Maxon says. "This was Kriss' idea, the tour I mean. She wanted to see all the girls again. I think she was beginning to get lonely here."
"I mean it's a big palace, I'm not surprised! If I had been your wife, I'd have had to have Marlee with me all the time." I suddenly stop and turn to Maxon with wide eyes. "Marlee! Is she here? Can I see her?"
"She is!" Maxon grins, "I can take you to her, if you'd like to go now?"
"Oh yes please!" My heart swells at the thought of seeing one of my best friends again.
"She might still be awake, let's go now." Maxon stands and I follow him, wrapping my robe around me tighter. We make our way to the kitchens, Maxon just ahead of me. I want to instinctively link his arm, but I know it would be overstepping the boundary now. We reach the servants quarters and Maxon knocks on a wooden door. A young man comes to the door, I recognise Carter instantly.
"Your Majesty! Lady America!" He smiles broadly.
"America?!" I hear Marlee cry, she comes to the door in seconds and as soon as she sees me, she throws her arms around me. "Oh America, I've missed you so much!" She sobs, I begin to cry as well. I look to my side and see even Maxon has teared up slightly.
"Marlee, I've missed you so, so much!" I cry as well. She breaks from our embrace and grins through her tears.
"Gentleman, may we have some privacy to catch up?" Marlee asks sweetly, Maxon nods.
"I have to get back to Kriss, she'll be wondering where I am. America I trust you'll find your way back okay?" Maxon asks, I nod.
"Thank you so much … Your Majesty." I say.
"Please, America, it's Maxon. It always has been." Her smiles softly and takes my hand and kisses it softly. I blush and he says his last goodbye to Marlee and Carter before leaving swiftly. Carter makes an excuse to leave the small room they live in and I sit at the table they have with Marlee.
"America when you left I was gutted. Honestly, I thought it would be you. What happened?!" Marlee asks.
"Where do I even begin?" I give Marlee the nutshell version of what happened between Aspen and Maxon and that Aspen had been my first love and I had tried to let go and juggle them both. Marlee listens to everything, nodding in understanding.
"Oh America. Maxon should've listened to you. He should've. He knows he's made a mistake. All the staff say he doesn't look as happy with Kriss as he was with you. It seems the last two years have worn him down a little."
"They seemed so happy two years ago when I was here in the Selection." I comment, remembering when Maxon had to go to New Asia and I saw first-hand their physical relationship.
"They were at first, but I think he would've rather had you at his side." Marlee sighs. "Are you happy now?" She asks. I smile as best I can.
"I am, but Jackson and I don't have the fire Aspen and I had, nor Maxon and me. He was chosen by the King."
"And you trust him?" Marlee raises an eyebrow.
"I don't know. It took me a while, because of Clarkson but I think that he was chosen to pacify me or something. Keep me under control. Maxon said his father thought I might come back and try to make him run away with me."
"Or start a rebellion." Marlee says quietly.
"I don't want a rebellion! I just wanted justice." I cry. Marlee takes my hand and squeezes it in a comforting way.
"I think if Maxon had the chance, he would admit his feelings to you in a heartbeat." She grins wickedly.
"That's a fantasy Marlee. He's married now."
"Scandals have happened for less in this place." Marlee sighs.
After wrapping up with Marlee, and one last hug, I make my way back to my room. When I enter, I see Jackson sitting in a chair opposite the door. We stare at each-other as I shut the bedroom door and I sigh.
"Where have you been?" Jackson asks.
"I went for a walk around the grounds, I wanted to reminisce." I say, which isn't a lie.
"Did you go to him?" Jackson asks, there is no love or tenderness in his voice. I can tell he is angry at me.
"I didn't go to his room if that's what you're implying. He was in the garden and we talked for a bit." I say honestly. Jackson sighs and rolls his eyes.
"America, you know you are mine. I don't like you wandering off in the middle of the night with Maxon considering your history. It won't happen again." He stands and walks towards me.
"Jackson, you don't own me. I'm not your property." I shoot back, I am shocked he even dared talk to me like that. No one behaved this way with their wives, men and women were mostly equals in marriage. He comes close and grabs my wrists. Hard.
"I will not have you going to him and treating this as a way to get back in with him and the Crown." His grip tightens.
"You're hurting me." I try to wriggle from his grasp but it's no use. He's never been this way with me.
"Good. Maybe then you'll listen to me. I forbid it America. You will marry me, none of this faffing about anymore changing the dates. We will be married at the end of the tour, and you will be my wife and mine alone." He releases my arm with a jerk and goes back to the bed. "Now come to bed, you need to look beautiful for tomorrow." He smiles, though there is no happiness in his eyes. Defeated, I crawl into bed and turn my back to him, my wrist still stinging.
The next few days consist of plans for the tour, talks about where we will go and what we will do. Silvia explains in our home provinces we will make our own special speech we must write. I begin to sense this is to make the country like the Royal Family again. I stick to Jackson's side most of the time, afraid of him growing angry again. I know in my heart the America of two years ago would scream at me for allowing him to treat me this way, but I am not that girl anymore.
"I can't wait to set off. The publicity will be brilliant for my career." Celeste grins as she flicks through a magazine in the Women's Room. Our husbands, and partners, are with the King and Prince, talking about politics or whatever the men need to discuss about the tour. The Queen sits with us women, catching up and planning speeches and parties with the nobles in each province.
"I have seen you so much more frequently now Celeste, I'm glad your modelling career has shot off." The Queen says, smiling with genuine pride.
"It's thanks to the Selection, Your Majesty." Celeste replies sweetly. The Queen smiles again and turns to me.
"Lady America, you've been awfully quiet?" She seems to have genuine concern in her voice. This is the first time I have spoken to her since coming here and it's already been three days.
"I'm just taking it all in, Your Majesty." I shrug. She raises one of her perfect eyebrows.
"You've changed since I last saw you. I remember this fiery girl, always with something to say." She pushes. I look at my hands in my lap and quietly reply,
"I seem to have changed a lot in the last year. Perhaps my fiancé has managed to mellow me out a little and I realised some decorum." The girls around me all stare, a little shocked, but no one says anything.
"When are we due to set off Your Grace?" Natalie asks. The Queen looks at me for a moment longer before turning to Natalie.
"Tomorrow, dear. It seems Maxon and Clarkson have got everything arranged security wise and we have just about finished up with our events planning. I have enjoyed you girls being in the palace once again." She muses.
"I have too!" Kriss adds, beaming. I can't help but feel she is only happy we are all here to see her success in winning the Selection. She's doing a fine job of rubbing it into our faces. As we all chat, there is a quiet knock at the door, and a maid scurries in to whisper something in the Queen's ear.
"I see." She smiles.
"Maxon is outside the door." she says, Kriss immediately stands. "No, dear. He's here to see America." I don't look up, but I can feel every set of eyes on me. Kriss' eyes are burning into my soul.