Fifty Shades of Grey Hair II

by American Chimpanzee

Like Grey Hair I, these stories are based on classic jokes like this bad driver joke by Will Rogers: "When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car."

30. Pretty Precocious (Part One)

Christian is not one to talk about his past, but one night he was in a talkative mood—one gets that way as one gets older—and he was rambling on about when he was in private school. As it turns out, it would seem he was rather precocious and advanced for a child. When he was ten he told his teacher that he was in love with her.

"I want you to be my girlfriend," he said.

"I'm afraid not," his teacher replied.

"Why not?" Christian wanted to know. "Don't you like me?"

"Yes," she said. "I like you very much."

"Don't you want a boyfriend?" he reasoned.

"Yes," she answered, "but I don't want a child."

"'So I'll use a condom,'" he said.