Chapter 4: Transgression
Akako sipped her small vial of awakening potion as she watched her cauldron bubble. Somehow finding Aoko a girlfriend had not served to free Kaito for her own access. Perhaps it was jealousy that had led to Kaito watching Aoko so much more, but... either way it was frustrating. Couldn't he accept defeat?
Shaking her head, she tossed the koi scales into the bubbling concoction before her. Kaito was going to be hers soon either way. Maybe having to use magic was a little annoying, but it would be her magic and therefore still her victory... unlike the love charm her mother had placed on her that made normal men too easy, so as to not be worth caring for the love of.
"Spirits," Akako said, turning to the magic mirror she'd had recently installed in her potion room. "Show me his face. I want to see the face of the one man who can resist me."
The silver of the mirror twitched a moment, static shuddering across it, before it returned to normal.
"There is no man who can resist you," the disembodied voice of the mirror replied.
Akako's eye twitched. "What do you mean by that? Has something happened to Kuroba?"
"Kuroba?" the mirror asked, it's tone clearly meant to feign ignorance. Akako narrowed her eyes. "Oh! Kuroba Kaito, you classmate? The one known as Kaitou Kid?"
Akako nodded. Slowly.
"Kuroba-chan is happily asleep right now. It is sweet of you to care for your classmate though," the mirror replied.
"Has he lost his immunity to the love charm?" Akako asked, her stress levels rising.
"Kuroba Kaito is not part of the demographic targeted by the charm," the mirror replied.
Akako shot a small bolt of electricity into the wall beside the mirror, deciding she'd had enough of this evasiveness. "Explain what's going on. From the top. Now."
The glass of the mirror shifted, revealing a coy looking minor demon. "Er, well... the Kuroba family are famously hard to read. Kuroba Touichi's heart was hidden from even the lords of the deepest hells... so, we didn't pick up on the secret that Kuroba Kaito had so buried that even she was unaware of it, but... it turns out Kaito is not the one man immune to your magic, but, rather, actually female."
Akako's eye twitched again, as she struggled against the desire to throw something that would shatter the scrying mirror (it had been rather expensive after all).
"You blistering incompetents!" she shouted. "All that effort and intrigue to try to gain a unique prize, and Kaito was a girl the whole time!?"
"Sorry?" the spirit in the mirror offered.
Akako flopped back into a nearby chair, letting out a groan from the depths of her heart.
Getting dressed for school felt weird, for Kaito. It seemed familiar, and easy, and... made last night's epiphany seem like it may have been a moment of over enthusiasm.
Kaito stayed quiet and a little out of it during the morning classes, having an internal crisis of faith and identity.
"Up," Akako whispered in Kaito's ears shortly after lunch began.
Kaito's body obeyed before the young magician could process, and followed Akako out of the class. It didn't take long for Kaito to regain control, but curiosity, and this providing a distraction from the current dilemma, prompted Kaito to follow her anyhow. The pair reached a quiet stairwell a short while later.
"I wish to apologise," Akako said, seeming like it was painful for her to say. "Some of my underlings made a mistake about you, Kuroba, and that drew me in to make your life difficult."
"Pardon?" Kaito asked.
"I've banished a couple of them to the depths of a frozen hell as punishment... while I might not have been taught to value the lives of others as much as most, I do feel a bit bad having harassed you for incorrect reasons. Even if I am disappointed that there are no actual men challenging enough to win the affections to be interesting," the witch muttered, leaning against the wall.
"Wait, you... I... were you spying on me?" Kaito asked, feeling defensive and paranoid.
"Not actively," Akako replied. "I have better things to do with my time than watching you constantly. Especially now that I know you're a girl underneath everything."
Kaito's heart fluttered and the declaration of her femininity. Akako had said it so matter-of-factly too. That giddy feeling from the night before washed over her again... what had they called it online? Gender euphoria? She was pretty sure that was the term, and it certainly felt apt.
"Okay, that's not your usually smug grin... what does it mean?" Akako asked, seeming a little uncomfortable.
"I-just... you called me... I almost want to hug you, even with the whole 'attempted murders' thing between us," Kaito replied, feeling a giddy energy in her. "I... don't tell Aoko yet though, okay? Things are-they're-well, it's complicated, but I'm going to handle that myself. Okay?"
"Your love life is no longer of any interest to me," Akako replied flatly, keeping her distance.
Kaito nodded, before turning to head back to class. She wanted to skip... like she was about to go as girly as Aoko or something. It must have been some sort of subconscious desire to make up for lost time. She resisted though. Attracting attention so early wasn't the best plan. Especially not before telling Aoko.
How Kaito was going to tell Aoko still remained a total mystery, but that was what talking to Sera was hopefully going to help with. An outside perspective might be able to figure out some sort of a way out of this mess of lies turned to truths...
After an awkward day of trying to talk to Aoko during class without letting the truth slip, Kaito was finally free. She hurried home, to grab some feminine clothing and a little makeup to apply once away from Ekoda and the risk of running into classmates, though she purposefully left her 'Kaiko' mask behind. It was a quick jog from her house back around to Ekoda station, where she grabbed a train back once more to Haido.
She managed to reach the mall again ahead of schedule, which gave her the opportunity to dither with uncertainty for a moment. She knew she looked fine as a girl. She'd disguised as a girl without a mask before on more than one occasion after all. Yet... she felt more self conscious this time. It actually mattered to her...
Shaking her head, Kaito slipped into a clothing store, found a changing stall, and worked on fixing her look. The high waisted red dress did a good job of covering for her lack of hips, and a padded bra did the rest of the work her figure needed. She tossed on a short dark bob of a wig, quickly applied some makeup, and gave herself a once over in the mirror. She looked good.
With that done, she headed back out.
Heading towards the food court (it did seem the best place in Haido City Mall to meet up), Kaito pulled out her 'Kaiko' phone and checked that it was nearly time. She scrolled to Sera's number (which didn't take long, the phone having all of 2 contacts in it's address book) and dialed. It took only a couple rings to get an answer.
"Hey, I'm almost there," Sera said.
"Good to hear... I'll keep my eyes peeled for you then. You, uh, you probably won't recognise me right now, afterall," Kaito replied, keeping up the more feminine version of her own voice that she'd used for 'Kaiko'.
"Oh? Are you... are you stuck dressing like a guy?" Sera asked. "Since it's right after school and all that?"
Kaito spotted the fanged detective on the edge of the food court and started walking over.
"No, no. I had time to change, but... my mum does special effects stuff," Kaito explained (not technically lying). "She's taught me how to do prosthetics and stuff. I've, uh... I've kind of been wearing some when I went out as Kaiko. I've decided to try not doing that now."
Internally she hoped against hope that the clues wouldn't let Sera work out she was also Kaitou Kid, but she decided the risk of suspicion was worth getting advice on her current relationship disaster. After all, Hakuba suspected her, but had never found proof. Surely a few hints wouldn't be enough to have Sera handcuff her and call the MPD. Or beat her up...
"Prosthetics? I... that's some heavy duty stuff. I'm glad you're feeling confident enough to try going out without them," Sera said, surprise audible in her voice.
"It's not really about confidence, it's... complicated," Kaito said, now in range that Sera could hear her in person.
The short haired girl spun around to see Kaito, and stared in confusion for a second.
"Kaiko?" she whispered after a moment.
"Well, I'm debating a different name, but... yes," Kaito replied.
A blush spread on Sera's cheeks. "You're... you're really cute."
Again, Kaito felt her heart flutter at being called cute. Still, she couldn't dwell on that too long. She had to fess up to the situation.
"Why were you wearing those prosthetics then?" Sera asked, as if to ensure Kaito didn't let herself wiggle out of confessing.
"It's a mess of a story, and... what I need your help with. Assuming you don't hate me when I finish explaining," Kaito replied.
Sera rubbed her temples as she processed everything Kaito had said. She supposed the opening part about Kaito having just been there to watch things unfold fit well enough with how Kaito had behaved until Sera decided she needed to 'help out'. Kaito had talked about not wanting another date after the first date too.
She knew she always felt a little disappointed when a cute girl closed away after realising she was a girl herself, and could only imagine Kaito in the reverse situation having her crush be the one mistakenly flirting. Or, not mistakenly flirting, going off Kaito's apparent recent revelation.
"You're sure you're not mixing up romantic desires to please Aoko with your actual identity?" she asked, trying not to let the cuteness of Kaito's nervous eyes distract her.
Kaito nodded. "There's plenty of signs going back. Honestly, I feel embarrassed about not clueing in before now... could have avoided this whole mess if I'd realised I was a girl before ending up Aoko's girlfriend."
Sera let out a sigh. She didn't like being trapped up in webs of lies... why did her life have to keep being so complicated? It was so much easier to take lies apart to catch a criminal than to try to navigate out from inside them.
A blunt confession seemed risky. Maintaining the lie until it fell apart seemed worse, but bought time. Faking 'Kaiko's' death or forcing a break up and then having Kaito zip in with a confession of transness and asking Aoko out floated in her head for a few seconds and left Sera feeling disappointed in herself for even having the thought.
"Oh, Sera!" a voice called out.
Ran's voice.
Sera felt her heart skip a beat, and she saw Kaito pale. Turning, Sera saw Ran with a bag from the martial arts store yesterday. She vaguely remembered Ran having not been sure which size to buy for the sparring gloves. She guessed that Ran had chosen the wrong size.
Sera's heart skipped again when she realised Conan was following along beside Ran. She wasn't sure what he'd think of everything, but suspected he'd not be the most understanding. He got a little harsh sometimes.
"Is everything okay?" Ran said, having come closer while Sera's mind tried to recalibrate to the situation.
"Reasonably?" Sera offered, as Kaito studied the table carefully.
"Is it anything I can help with?" Ran asked.
The girl wasn't a detective, but she was dangerously good at empathy sometimes. Sera glanced over to Kaito.
"Should we tell her?" Sera asked.
"Well, I guess if you don't know what to do either, then maybe we can brainstorm as a group. It's good practice for the unpleasantness of the actual confession too," Kaito muttered.
Sera nodded, before turning to Ran and gesturing to the seat beside her. Ran took the seat, while Conan hopped himself in place across from her, and beside Kaito. He didn't look very interested, however. Sera hoped he continued not to pay too much attention, and that she could cover up the evidence for a theory bubbling in her mind about Kaito.
"You see... Kaiko's mother works in theatre or movies or that sort of thing, and taught her about effects makeup. Kaiko had been using that to disguise her face up until now," Sera explained, gesturing over to the girl in question.
"Using... that's you, Kaiko?" Ran said, leaning over to Kaito.
Kaito nodded, though kept her eyes down. (Sera wasn't surprised about that. Her real face would be familiar to Ran and would just cause more questions.)
Conan eyed her suspiciously, though, even with his low angle giving him a good view of Kaito's face he didn't seem to notice who she looked like.
"I... I kind of know Aoko," Kaito said, keeping her voice soft. "She's probably my best friend, and has been for years."
"She was at the cafe to be nosey, wanted to see what sort of girl her best friend would like. So she was wearing stage makeup to avoid being recognised. Then I went and 'helped out' by setting her up with Nakamori," Sera added.
Ran nodded slowly. "That's... that's complicated. I'm curious, though, if you liked her, and you know she likes girls, then... why didn't you ask her out as yourself before all this?"
"Uhhh... well..." Kaito muttered, twiddling her thumbs. "She thinks I'm a guy, and... until this whole thing started rolling, I had no reason to doubt the idea either. It was only spending time acting and being treated like a girl that made me clue in to how much I like it."
That got a strange look from Conan, who gave Kaito a once over. Ran, for her part, seemed confused, but was weighing it thoughtfully. Conan gave Sera a confused look, which she replied to with a casual shrug. It was her fault if he didn't understand these things yet.
"So, you're trying to figure out how to confess who you really are?" Ran asked, at last.
"Or if I should try something else. Keep building her trust as her girlfriend, maybe? Or... I don't know?" Kaito offered.
"You have to confess," Ran said firmly. "If you were a classmate she didn't talk to much, or... something like that, then I could see you relying on gaining her trust at all as her girlfriend and you could confess later, but as her best friend? You'd be playing the role of two of the most important people in her life. That's twice the sense of betrayal with the truth comes out, and twice the loss of people to turn to for emotional support. The longer you hurt the worse it will be on her. You're not protecting her from pain, and, if she starts to figure it out on her own, imagine the self doubt and second guessing she'll go through!"
Ran paused, realising her volume had gone well above normal conversational levels, and shrunk back into her seat.
"That's-that's just my opinion," Ran whispered. "Truth is the best path."
Kaito nodded slowly, while Conan sat looking like a deer in the headlights. If she hadn't been so caught up in the mess around Kaito, and partially responsible, Sera probably would have laughed about Conan's face.
"I'll... I'll call her," Kaito muttered, pulling out a phone.
"It'll be tough, but it's the right thing to do," Ran said, her voice soft now.
Kaito fiddled a bit to make a call. She waited a bit with the phone to her ear for a few moments, before Aoko answered. Sera could only hear half the conversation, but enough to hear Kaito ask to meet up with Aoko that evening, and got a positive reply. Kaito's body language grew rather tense as the conversation continued, and she didn't release when she hung up.
"If it doesn't go well... Sera and I are here for you," Ran said.
"Th-thank you. I'm not sure I deserve it, but... thank you," Kaito said, looking up at last and offering Ran a smile.
"I definitely owe you that, at least, since I'm half responsible for the mess you're in," Sera replied, trying her best to smile.
She did not envy Kaito right now.
Kaito swallowed nervously, standing near the gazebo in the small park she'd agreed to meet Aoko in. She was wearing the 'Kaiko' mask again, to make the meet up and confession smoother. Or, at least, she thought it might help. She really wasn't sure what she was doing.
She always lost so much of her confidence where Aoko was involved, and it drove her crazy.
"Ah! Kaiko! There you are!" Aoko's voice called out, the other girl arriving a minute or two before the scheduled time.
"Hello Aoko," Kaito said, turning to her with a forced smile.
"Is everything okay? It's not that I don't like meeting up with you, but you sounded like you needed to talk right away on the phone," Aoko replied.
Kaito swallowed again. "I... I have something I need to confess."
"Something else?" Aoko asked. There was concern in her eyes, but he didn't think it was judgment just yet.
"Yes. Something major. It's... well, I'll start by showing you my phone," Kaito said, handing the cheap little thing over to Aoko, unlocking it as she did so.
Aoko took the phone, confusion in her eyes as she looked at how devoid it was of any apps (beyond those that came with the phone).
"Check the contacts," Kaito said.
Aoko nodded and did so.
"There's only two... is it a separate phone you have? Is... are you not 'out' to your parents and friends?" Aoko asked.
"No, I'm not. I'm about to come out to my best friend though," Kaito said, taking inspiration from what Aoko had asked.
"Oh! Aoko is happy to support you with that, if you need it?" Aoko replied, her smile so soft and sweet, making Kaito's heart skip a beat.
"Well, you... I... I'll just show you," Kaito said, grabbing the base of her mask and pulling it up and off her face.
Aoko stared at her, mouth slightly agape.
"Surprise?" Kaito offered, not sure what to say.
An emotion slowly slipped into Aoko's face. An emotion Kaito had hoped not to see: sadness.
"Is... is this some kind of a joke, Kaito? It's not... it's not funny!" she said, tears welling in her eyes. "Did you steal Kaiko's phone to do this?"
"What? No? Kaiko is me. It's been me the whole time," Kaito replied, her tone maybe sliding a little more defensive than she wanted.
"Don't lie about something like that!" Aoko all but shouted, her hands balling up into fists. "This is-this is too much for a joke."
"I didn't plan to lie to you. I was just curious... and, I guess feeling defensive. I've had a crush on you since we were kids and I... I think I wanted to go see if whoever I was losing you to felt good enough," Kaito said, her voice soft and weak. "I didn't mean to end up being your date."
"It was really you? The whole time?" Aoko asked, sounding more dead inside than anything.
Kaito nodded, hoping that, maybe, Aoko would decide spreading the feelings she talked about having for Kaiko to her real identity was the logical next step.
"So... so you lied to me as Kaiko, and then lied to me as Kaito too... you must have thought you were so clever, when I was telling you about how wonderful my fake girlfriend was," Aoko muttered, slowly turning away from Kaito. "Aoko is just so fun to make fun of..."
"What? No. Aoko! I wasn't... I mean, I did lie, because I was an idiot and didn't know how to tell the truth without hurting you, but... the way I couldn't help smiling when I saw you smile, and the joy I felt being around you... that was all real," Kaito replied, trying to step forward, to reach out for Aoko.
Only she pulled away.
"Why should Aoko trust you now?" she asked, and Kaito lacked a clear response.
Kaito closed her eyes, there was one thing she could do, that would hopefully help convince Aoko. She hated humble bowing. Doing a bow at the end of a show was fun, but as self humiliation... she loathed that. So, Aoko would know she was serious if she bowed. Especially if she went all in.
Taking a deep breath, she dropped down to her knees, placing her hands on the ground before her, and bent into a full prostrating bow.
"Please accept my apology!" Kaito announced, hoping she was loud enough while facing the ground.
She received only silence. Nervously, she glanced up, only to find that Aoko wasn't there. Looking around, Kaito spotted Aoko walking away. With how slow Aoko was going and how far she was, she'd probably left while Kaito was talking herself into bowing. The gesture had been too late.
Emotions swelling, Kaito felt herself tearing up. She tried to fight it for a moment, to stay stoic, but... she realised she didn't have a good reason to hold back, simply slumping down again in the grass.
She messed up, and she was pretty sure she deserved this response.