Doomguy spent eons ripping and tearing in hell as the Doom Slayer, but it got boring after a while, and the high overlords of hell knew it. And so after another battle against Arch-Viles the Slayer simply casually walked around with his Super Shotgun in hands, thinking how much he hated Arch-Viles more than he hated the Icon of Sin.
But then out of nowhere a portal opened behind him, and as he looked through it he saw some weird landscapes he never saw before, pretty sure he knew all of hell by now, more or less. But eh there are demons on the other side so he gotta kill those bastards.
As soon as he passed through, the portal closed behind him and the Slayer found himself in a weird cartoonish shaped version of hell, every demon around looked kinda weird even for demons. He found himself in the middle of a city with a big clock tower that said 245 days before next cleansing. He didn't knew what the fuck it meant but he was sure gonna make it sooner than expected. He heard a car in the distance coming at him, he stood still until the car got closer, and then he quickly turned and kicked the car before the car hit him. The car didn't survived, but the slayer was too angry to die and didn't give a damn about any demonic cars.
He grabbed the driver by his neck, put the barrel of his super shotgun in his mouth and blew his head out of existence! He looked behind and saw two random pedestrians standing in place looking at him while shitting their pants.
The first one said "Is that the Doom Slayer?"
The second one ran away as the Slayer faced the first demon, the demon gazed at the barrel of the Slayer's super shotgun and said "Oh shit!" before having his brain blown apart.
But then he found a note laying around, the letter read.
"Doomguy. Go to 303 avenue, and have fun"
The Slayer looked around and killed every random demon on his way to his destination, he expected some easy prey or another BFG 9000, whatever was waiting for him must be worth the look.
After a few hours of ripping and tearing his way through the city he finally reached 303 avenue. The street was literally between two building and looked like an ideal place to commit murder, not that it would matter that much in hell but the Slayer alway like diversity.
In the distant shadows he heard a voice calling "Doomguy I presume?", he looked and saw a thin silhouette walking toward him with a cigarette in one hand.
"Well well… Valentino was right about you being thicc!" said the stranger.
When stepping outside the shadows of the street the thin shape was quite feminine with two pairs of arms, as the stranger kept walking toward the Slayer he introduced himself
"My name is Angel Dust. I heard you killed billions of demons."
He threw the cigarette and when he got into Doomguy's personal space he tried to seduce him with his... hot stuff.
"But I bet none of them had any charms like I do," said Angel Dust.
He wrapped his arms around Doomguy and said, "With that thicc green armor you must have a pretty big wiener if you catch my meaning?"
On this moment the Slayer realized that even after losing his pet r rabbit Daisy, even after killing the Icon of Sin, even after laying the armies of hell to waste, he was a goddamn virgin, and spending billions of years killing demons only increased his hormones levels, and for the first time since he left Argent D'nur, the Slayer was horny, and that was an understatement.
"I know a place where we could have some fun..." said Angel.
He then held Doomguy's left hand and walked towards the west side of the city, where he had rented a motels room for the night.
In the shadows of the abyss, the dark lord Satan was watching from a reflective wall showing Doomguy and Angel Dust walking together and holding hands.
A portal opened behind him, from the slipgate came the Marauder, undefeated champion of the Khan Makyr.
"My lord!"
He loudly said with a tone of both submission and respect.
He knelt down, showing his allegiance to the Holy Seal of Urdak.
He then with humility loudly asked.
"What is your command?"
The end.