Jasper

Rosalie did find out. Nothing was a secret in the Cullen household. Not with Alice and Edward. However, neither were the culprit this time.

It had actually been Emmett.

He and I were both playing Jenga (with our standard ten packs and elaborate rules), when she stormed in just as Emmett was delicately placing his piece down onto the ten-foot high tower, balancing on a chair. There was such a tornado of anger inside her, I thought she was going to smash it. Instead, she stopped right in front of it.

"Yes!" Clueless Emmett hissed, throwing his hands up in victory that it was impressively, still standing.

And then Rosalie flicked it with one finger. The entire thing came toppling down and there was a sea of small blocks all over the living room floor.

"Babe!" Emmett gaped, staring down at her in shock.

I exhaled, knowing immediately what was going on.

"That's what's going to happen. When your little pet human project fails," she stated.

"You said you didn't mind!" Emmett cried, jumping off the chair with a thump. "You said you couldn't care less."

"I thought about it," she replied. "And I changed my mind. Because when it all blows up in your faces, it will be worse than this." She gestured to the mess across the wooden floor.

I glanced between her and Emmett. Damn, he shouldn't have said anything to her. It couldn't be undone now. "Rose, Alice'll see if-," I started.

"Alice can't see everything." She snapped, cutting me off. "Besides, it's not just about one of you killing her. It's also that she might find out the truth. Surely she can tell something's off about us."

Emmett touched her shoulder. "That's what we've got Edward for, babe."

"This is the kind of thing we need to start trying, if we are going to be blending in with the humans. Something's got to be done differently. And Carlisle and Esme agree." I said, trying my best to stay calm despite the raging storm in front of me. I wanted to influence Rosalie, though she was so used to it now she would be able to tell and would only get even more livid with me later.

"Whatever," she muttered, turning around, her high heels clicking on the floors as she left, kicking some of the blocks clear of her path.

Emmett looked at me. "Well, I think I won."

Some time later, round three was interrupted again with Alice.

She jumped onto the balcony from outside and opened the sliding glass doors. "Our human friend needs us," she stated. "Leilani's mother's taking her to the hospital this afternoon."

I dropped the block I was holding in the box. "Why, what's happened, Alice?" I crossed the room to where she was standing by the doors in less than a second.

"Another panic attack. But it's alright. I've seen her with Carlisle."

I furrowed my brow, remembering how horrible Leilani had felt before only a couple of days ago. It had passed eventually, leaving an echo behind.

"Poor kid," Emmett folded his arms.

"Don't worry," Alice smiled. "We're going to help her. Dad's inviting her to dinner."

Emmett grimaced. "We'll have to eat…"

I elbowed him, "Not if we're sneaky. I bet I can get away with hiding more food than you."

"Oh no way," my brother laughed.

"What on Earth are you plotting, Emmett?" Esme appeared in the room; an eyebrow raised in suspicion.

"Nothing you wouldn't approve of, I swear," he grinned.

Esme shook her head, full of doubt.

"Leilani's coming to visit us." Alice beamed. "For dinner! And maybe even a sleepover."

"What?" Esme looked at each of us in turn. "When was this decided?"

Alice quickly explained, "She had another panic attack so her mother took her to the hospital where Carlisle is seeing to her. And he'll invite her over to dinner since her parents are both working and she shouldn't really be alone."

My loving mother naturally went through sadness and pity, to excitement. "Alice, what do I make her? When is she arriving?"

"Dad will call us before, to make sure everything's arranged." She stated, "I don't know what time."

"It will be fine, mom," Emmett hugged her.

"This is crazy," Esme said, hugging him back and then letting go. "Boy's you'd better clean all this up. There's so much to do!" With that she rushed out of the room to the kitchen.

Leilani

There were a few more details Dr Cullen needed before I could leave. He wanted me to explain any plans of hurting myself to him, so I was as honest as possible – I didn't have any hard plans, just thoughts about what it might be like for it to happen, and ideas of how it would happen. It was nothing I was going to act on.

My mum had to go to work, leaving me there as Dr Cullen was going to drive me. It seemed extremely unusual, but that is how things were happening. Nothing felt right, so of course this wouldn't either.

I stopped by the pharmacy while he went to gather his things and get his car. I sat down on one of the green chairs, waiting for them to fill my new prescription. Taking tablets had never been easy for me, so I hoped they were small. I wondered what effect they would have on me. Obviously, I wouldn't start jumping around happy all the time. I suppose I would be less sad. Perhaps not having panic attacks and crying a lot? There would no doubt be more information on the leaflet inside.

I had forgotten to ask how long I'd need to take them for. Two weeks to take effect. A month? Half a year? A year? Forever? My throat hurt and I pressed my lips together, trying not to fall apart in the pharmacy.

When my name was called, I took the bag with shaking hands and headed for the exit.

It wasn't that cold outside, even in just a jumper, but I was still shaking all over. I pulled down my sleeves and slipped my forearm through the handles of the bag so I could cross my arms and rub my shoulders a bit. It was beginning to get dark.

A black Mercedes pulled up by the pavement and I just about saw him through the tinted windows. He reached over and opened the door for me.

"Thanks, Dr Cullen." I said as I got in and sat down in the passenger seat.

"No problem. Please, call me Carlisle." He gave me another warm smile and began driving out of the carpark.

I reached for my back pocket, expecting to find my phone there. It was empty. In the rush to leave the house, I must have left it at home.

"Where do you live?" I asked.

"Do you know Cherry Tree Avenue?"

Oh, they were that close? "That's only a couple of roads from where my house is. Is it ok if maybe we can stop there first – at Shetland Road? I left my phone." I chewed my lip.

"Of course," he said.

It was properly dark outside. The sky was a dark blue and the streetlights were all on. I was grateful that it wasn't light anymore so it was harder to see me starting to get tearful again. I couldn't imagine how his family were going to react to me in their home. Turning in my seat to feign looking out of the window, I strained my neck a little too far. I tried to swallow away the hard lump in my throat.

"Alice sounded really excited on the phone," Carlisle broke the silence.

"Really?" I chocked out a broken kind of sound and cleared my throat. "Really?" I repeated, adjusting the position in my seat, afraid of being rude.

"Yeah," he glanced at me for a moment. "She can't stop talking about you You're the first friend she's had in quite a while."

I didn't know what to say. "Oh," was the best I could do. We had that in common then. Apart from Evie, I didn't really get close to anyone at Uni, and I'd fallen out of contact with my school friends.

"Which is your house?" Carlisle asked, as we'd made it to my road.

"The second left," I said.

He pulled into the driveway.

"Thank you," I told him, opening the door. "I won't be long."

"You're welcome. Take your time."

Inside I walked into the kitchen and saw my laptop screen shining in the darkness next to my phone. There was a miss call from Alice and a message from her.

It simply read: Sleepover, sleepover, sleepover! Love Alice. P.S. Bring swimming stuff.

I read it a few times in confusion, half-smiling, and then I pocketed it.

Upstairs, I grabbed a bag and shoved a change of clothes into it, along with my Switch, chargers, toothbrush, medication, and of course my bikini as Alice had requested. I also put on my faux black leather jacket. Just before I left, I washed my face and cleaned my smudged glasses. In the mirror I looked ok. Not great, not terrible. At least I didn't look as bad as I thought.

"Ready to go?" Carlisle asked as I got back into the car.

"Yeah, thanks." I nodded, doing my seatbelt up.

If I thought my house was big, the Cullen house was enormous. It was one of those mansions on the really posh road, maybe a twenty-minute walk from my house. It looked very modern, with a long drive up to a large garage, probably big enough to fit several cars inside.

Carlisle stopped out the front and I followed him up the steps to the front door.

Alice was already opening it, he regular bubbly self. "Leilani!" she cried, wrapping her arms around me. Even though she wore a black dress with a black lacy cardigan, I could feel how cold she was.

"Alice," I said, "You're so cold!"

"Sorry," she let go of me. "Everyone says that."

She let me inside. "You can leave your bag here." Alice motioned to the bench by the front door.

I slipped my shoes and jacket off, putting them neatly out the way.

"You like burgers, right?" she asked me.

I nodded enthusiastically. "Oh, of course!"

Alice smiled widely. "Perfect! I knew you'd say that."

Everything was so open in the house, it almost looked like one of the fancy mansions on TV. The kitchen was practically a showroom. I could hear the sizzling of the meat in the pan and a beautiful woman with long caramel hair was humming as she cooked.

"Do you want a drink?" Alice asked me, already opening a cupboard and holding a glass.

I realised I was actually quite thirsty. "Yes please, just water, thanks."

Emmett and Jasper were sitting on stools at the island, ending their conversation of whatever they had been talking about. I felt warm, trying to tell myself they weren't talking about me.

"Welcome, Leilani," the woman turned around, putting her spatula down. "I'm Esme. I've made some burgers. I hope that's ok?" She had an equally beautiful smile, which lit up her whole face. I couldn't help relax slightly as she made me feel more comfortable.

"That's so nice. Thank you." I replied.

"No problem," she turned back to the food.

Alice handed me a glass of water. "Thanks, Alice." I took a few mouthfuls.

"Hey, Leilani," Emmett greeted me.

"Hey," said Jasper.

They were both smiling at me, and I didn't know what to think anymore. Were they just being polite? How much had they been told? Did they know about my meltdown and hospital visit? Did they know all the details?

I suddenly wanted to be somewhere else. Anywhere else. I felt so sick I wouldn't want to eat anyway. How could I leave? How could I disappear from that situation? I couldn't just run away.

"Um, Alice? Where's the bathroom?" I placed my glass down on the white island counter.

She pointed to a hallway off the kitchen. "That way, on the left."

"Thanks."

Down the hallway I felt a little more at ease now that no one could see me. I locked the door and took a seat on the edge of the bath, trying to take deep breaths. Don't cry, don't cry. I looked up at the ceiling, blinking away any tears threatening to fall. It was just one night. I just had to get through one night.

And then kill myself tomorrow. I swallowed. No, stop it.

Everything was fine. Or it would be eventually. I flushed the toilet and watched my hands, eyeing my reflection in the mirror. I really looked fucking miserable.

Using my fingers, I brushed through some strands of my hair, trying to tidy myself up a bit. Satisfied, I made my way back to the kitchen.

Esme was plating up the burgers, which smelt amazing.

"Come and sit next to me!" Alice patted an empty stool next to her at the end of the island, my glass of water on the top.

I tried to smile at her, and hopped up. I was opposite Jasper, who had moved to the other end. We made eye contact for a second before Esme put a plate down in front of me.

"I hope you like it, Leilani," she said in a sweet voice.

"Thank you." They looked delicious. I picked one up and took a bite, instantly falling in love with her cooking. "It's so good," I said.

She grinned at me, "I'm glad. There's a few left if you'd like some more." Esme put a plate of half a dozen more in the middle, along with a bowl of French fries.

"Ten out of ten." Emmett agreed.

After taking another bite, I noticed his burger had already gone and he was wiping his hands on some kitchen roll. He had eaten that fast.

Jasper was eating just as quick. I noticed him reach over for a second one. Alice, however, ate slowly, reaching for some of the fries in the middle. I used the large spoon to get a handful of them onto my plate. I was fine with just the one burger and the fries.

Carlisle came into the kitchen and kissed his wife on the cheek before helping himself to one of them. The two of them left so it was just the four of us left in the kitchen.

I finished my food and took a long mouthful of water. "I hope this isn't weird." I said.

"Why would it be weird?" Jasper asked, surprising me.

I kept my eyes on my plate. "The other day you guys seemed in a hurry to leave."

Jasper put his glass down, causing me to look up. "Alice." He said, staring at her in accusation.

Alice's eyes were wide. "What! I told her!"

I licked the salt from my lips. "Oh, you really had an appointment? I thought…" I trailed off.

Jasper chuckled. "You thought we were ditching you?"

My face felt warm. "Yeah." I mumbled.

Emmett snorted.

"Leilani, do you not realise how cool you are?" Jasper met my eyes with a smile.

"Seriously," Alice said, "You're like the only person at Uni worth talking to."

"Truth," Emmett added.

I touched the back of my hair, embarrassed. "Really?"

"Nah, we were lying. There was poison in your burger." Emmett smirked.

Jasper punched him on the arm.

I properly smiled, laughing.

"Ok," Alice pushed her half-finished plate of food away from her, "We have a busy schedule of fun ahead of us this evening. I hope you like dancing, Leilani."

I, in fact, did like dancing, which was perfect as she had planned for us to all play Just Dance. They must have all played before and practiced a lot considering how they were able to perform the dances exactly as the animation on the screen. Thankfully the game was forgiving and I was still able to get a high score, though not as high as Alice, who was the best out of all of us. She and I played Girlfriend while Jasper and Emmett watched from the sofas.

At the end of the song I grinned at my score, seeing that I got six stars. Alice turned to me. "That was great!"

I nodded, "Yeah, well done."

"Did you bring your swimming stuff?" she asked.

"Uh huh."

"Great," she clapped her hands together. "Hot tub time!"

Holy shit, the Cullens had a hot tub? Judging by the look of their house, I had no reason to be surprised.

I got changed into my floral bikini in the bathroom and wrapped myself in a white towel Alice had lent me. It was freezing outside. I touched the bare decking with my feet and recoiled at the touch. Quickly I stepped over to the hot tub at the end, where Alice was pressing some buttons on a tiny screen.

The still, steaming water, erupted in some bubbles and she hopped in, laughing.

I placed my towel next to hers and felt the water with my hand. It was so warm and inviting. I carefully stepped inside and sat down in the corner. I sighed, feeling my muscles begin to relax against the jets. The whole thing was lit up with dim colours that changed every few seconds.

"This is lovely." I said.

"It's awesome," she replied. "Especially when it's cold like this."

I put my fingers by the jets, enjoying the feeling of being in the water.

Soon enough, Jasper joined us, going to one of the other corners. And then Emmett jumped in, splashing the three of us.

I wiped my face, holding my damp glasses in one hand and giggling.

"Such an asshole," Alice grumbled, folding her arms.

"Aw, come on sis." Emmett rolled his eyes.

"You've got all the towels wet!" she shrieked.

Emmett made a face. "Oops."

"It's not a pool, you can't just jump in! She-We're gunna be freezing when we get out." Alice stood up. "What if I got all your things soaked?" She climbed out, running across the deck.

"Wait, Alice, no!" Emmett scrambled after her. "Aliiiicccee!"

Jasper and I sat there laughing for a moment which turned into a comfortable silence. I leaned back, looking up at the stars through my glasses which occasionally steamed up and then cleared. I closed my eyes.

After a while the jets turned themselves off, and we were both just sitting in the hot water.

"Hey," Jasper said in a soft voice.

I opened my eyes and looked at him.

"Are you ok?"

I swallowed, not sure how to answer. I didn't want to just lie and say I was fine, but I didn't know if I would be able to tell the truth either.

Slowly I shook my head.

"I meant what I said before, Leilani. You can tell me," said Jasper. "If you want to," he added.

I looked away towards the dark garden, fiddling with one of my rings. We sat in silence for a little bit longer, as I tried to figure out what to say.

Finally, I spoke, "Your dad thinks I've got depression and anxiety." Just saying it, my throat ached. "I had another panic attack today. So, my mum took me to the hospital, and now I'm supposed to take time off Uni, have medication, therapy. I don't…" I trailed off, taking a deep breath.

Jasper slid across so he was right next to me.

I was looking down at the surface of the water. "I don't feel like myself anymore. Everything's just so – wrong. I don't think I belong here anymore. Sometimes I think it would be best if I just disappeared."

He took my hand then, and I looked up. We were only inches apart, and his warm hand felt so soft in mine. For a moment I never wanted him to let go. As we stared at each other, I saw pain in his amber eyes.

"You belong here, Leilani," he said, firmly, sliding his thumb across the back of my hand.

I couldn't say anything as a tear escaped, rolling down my cheek.

"It's gunna be ok," he tried to reassure me.

"How do you know?" I questioned. He couldn't promise that.

"I know the future."

I scoffed, "Ok."

"It's true." He smiled. "We have a lot of games lined up, for the next… I don't know, a long time."

"Right." I sniffed. "Can't the future be changed?"

"The future? Yes. Fate? No."

I shook my head. "Fate? A fated friendship?"

"Absolutely," he said, giving my hand a squeeze.

I smiled, "Thanks, Jasper."

He didn't reply, making eye contact with me again. We continued sitting there, my hand in his as we stared at each other's eyes.

Maybe I didn't want to be friends?

I couldn't do that to Jasper, though. He deserved someone without so many problems. Someone who wouldn't be a burden. Someone who had it together, and who was as hot as he was.

I let my hand slip away, pretending that I needed to adjust my glasses. "Are Alice and Emmett coming back?"

"Depends if there's been a murder," Jasper joked.

I lifted my head to try and see where my towel was, and judge whether it really was as wet as Alice had said. It was too dark to see.

"Hang on," Jasper flung his head back. "ALICE!" he called.

I almost laughed.

The back door slid open and Alice hurried back over towards us, wearing flip flops and a purple dressing gown. Her arms were pull of towels. "I'm coming, I'm coming."

"What did you do to Emmett?" Jasper asked.

"Nothing… permanent." She answered, handing me a towel as I stood up.

I quickly wrapped it around me, shivering.

Jasper stood up too, climbing out of the hot tub after me. I glanced at his fit body a bit too long, seeing the water droplets glistening in the dim light on his toned abs. I forced myself to look away, walking back into the house.

Dry, and dressed, the four of us sat in front of the TV in the living room, watching a comedy. I had a cup of tea in my hands and a blanket over me, snuggled up against a white fluffy cushion.

Alice was seated at the other end, with Jasper in the middle, and Emmett had one of the arm chairs with is feet up on the footrest.

The two of them seemed to have made up, joking around every now and then. Jasper and I stayed mostly quiet, watching the movie and laughing occasionally with the others.

My hands kept trembling still from earlier that afternoon, and I frowned gripping the mug tightly to try and keep them still. Eventually I gave up and put the mug down on the side table next to me. I brought the blanket up more, nestling in the warmth and hiding my hands underneath.

Jasper moved, adjusting his position next to me. I was tempted to sneak a glance at him, but thinking about the hot tub scenario made me embarrassed so I kept watching the TV instead.

Exhausted from everything that had happened, I found myself sinking lower into the sofa, until the side of my face was on the cushion and my legs were up to my chest. I tried to stay awake, but I didn't know what was going on in the film anymore, and just couldn't.

The last thing I felt was the blanket being pulled up to cover my shoulders. Or maybe I was doing that myself?