Chapter Six: Blaming It on the Withdrawal
Axel went back to class the next day wondering if he'd lost Saïx and cursing Zexion for taking the last of his medication. Surely he had some more in his dorm somewhere. He could really have used something to fight off the depression that hung over him like a cloud. One that might decide to rain on him at any moment, he imagined, leaving him soaked to the bone. And probably screwing up the hairstyle he'd spent twenty minutes in front of the mirror fixing.
Saïx hadn't even stuck around to yell at him for taking over the goddamn bathroom like he did almost every morning. By the time Axel had dragged himself out of bed, his roommate had disappeared, leaving no trace of his presence. He must have gotten up especially early in order to avoid running into me, Axel thought bitterly.
He sat down in the lecture hall for his first class and looked at the screen at the front of the room. Upon seeing the words there, he tipped his head back and groaned.
"You forget to do the homework, man?" Demyx asked.
"No… I mean… Let's just go with yeah." Axel sighed. "Can you cover me? Help a brother, you know?"
Demyx laughed. "Yeah, I'd totally say yes except…" He shrugged. "I didn't do it either. Who ever heard of having homework in a lecture class? I thought you were just supposed to sit down, shut up, and take the damn test at the end."
"Demyx, how long have you been here?" Axel asked.
"You didn't know I'm a freshman?" Demyx laughed. "Just kidding. I'm with Zexion and you."
Axel felt the blood drain from his face. Shit. "Have you talked to Zexion lately?"
"Uh, yeah, why?" Demyx looked confused.
"Because," Axel said, fumbling for an explanation. "Because… uh… I mean… Does he ever talk to you about his patients, you know, at the infirmary?"
"Eh," Demyx said with a shrug of his shoulders, turning back to the screen. "Not really. I used to ask, but he always said he didn't want to think about it more than he had to."
"Oh." Axel tried hard to hide his sigh of relief.
"Why do you ask?" Demyx asked, still not looking at Axel.
"I dunno."
After class had ended, Axel picked up his stuff and shot out of his seat. "Man, I gotta go work on that homework," he said.
"I don't know if they'll even let you turn it in late, bro," Demyx said. "You might just have to take the hit."
"I'll give it a shot." Axel threw his backpack over one shoulder. Plus, I have to have a reason to go to the library, so I can see… "Hey, speaking of that, can I borrow your notes again? I think I missed some stuff."
"Well, yeah, but you have to bring them back to me before the end of today, so I can study them. I gotta run, but here's my notebook. If you lose it, I'm taking yours."
"Deal." Axel took Demyx's notes and tucked them under his arm. "Later."
"See you."
Axel took off for the library.
At his table in the library, Axel flipped open to the notes both he and Demyx had taken. He scanned Demyx's pages and discovered just how much of the lecture he actually had missed. Where in the hell had his concentration gone? He didn't dare blame it on yesterday's episode, so he settled on blaming it on his withdrawal. And on Xion.
Who happened, of course, to be leaning on his desk at that moment.
"Oh, hey, Xion… I didn't see you there," he fumbled. She opened her mouth to speak, but he interrupted her before she could say anything. "Can I apologize for yesterday? I mean, I didn't realize what I was really saying. No, scratch that, I meant—I didn't mean what I said. It came out way wrong. So I'm, uh, sorry," he stammered.
"It's okay," Xion answered. "I'm sorry, too. About snapping at you."
"Why on earth are you apologizing?" Axel laughed, shaking his head. "You didn't even do anything wrong. And besides, that face of yours makes up for everything."
Xion blushed. "What do you mean, my face makes up for everything?"
"Haven't I already told you?" Axel lowered his voice. "You're—"
"That's right," Xion interrupted, glancing away. "You told me."
"Thought I did," Axel agreed, leaning back in his chair. "But I'm willing to do it again."
"I don't think Roxas would appreciate that very much."
"Probably 'cause he already knows… Damn lucky bastard."
"What was that?" Xion eyed him suspiciously.
"I said that's probably true," Axel lied, grinning up at her. "Anyway, have you talked to Roxas since yesterday? He have anything new to share?"
"Not… not really." Xion bit her lip. Besides looking incredibly alluring, Axel realized, she also looked like she was hiding something. Damn. It figured Roxas had to tell her about that. But if she knew, then why was she coming to talk to him? That made absolutely no sense.
"Well," Axel said, "I don't either, so why are you talking to me?"
The nervous expression faded from Xion's face, and a small smile replaced it. "Well, I know it sounds strange, but I'm bored."
"Oh, God, no," Axel sighed. "That's the worst. I'm a last resort because you're bored, huh."
"I'm sorry—that's not what I meant at all," Xion said. "What I meant was—you're kind of the only person I know in this whole library."
You don't know me. "Shouldn't you be working?"
"No. I just finished. I don't have class for another few hours," Xion told him. "What about you? What's that you're working on?"
"Notes, from my last class," Axel muttered, looking down at his page of hastily scrawled notes next to Demyx's organized ones. "I missed some stuff from the last few sessions."
Xion leaned over the divider at the edge of his desk and squinted at the writing that crossed the two pages. "Whose notes are those?" she asked, tapping Demyx's notebook.
"This guy who sits next to me in that class—his name's Demyx," Axel answered.
"Demyx? I know him," Xion said, a thoughtful look crossing her face. "He's my brother's—friend."
Axel wasn't sure what she meant by the long pause between the words "brother's" and "friend," but he decided to let it slide. "Yeah, so I've heard. I—uh—know your brother."
"You know Zexion?" Xion asked, breaking into another smile. She closed her eyes and laughed. "Of course you do. He's in the same grade as you are."
"Yeah," Axel said, but his mind had already wandered to how beautiful she looked when she laughed like that.
"What do you think of him? Is he actually nice when he's not around me?" Xion continued.
"What do you mean?" Axel demanded, slamming his hand down on the desk so hard that a few heads turned to look at him. He pressed his lips together and lowered his voice. "Xion, how could anyone possibly be anything but nice to you?"
"He's my brother," Xion said easily. "He can afford not to be nice."
Axel shook his head, disbelieving. Changing the subject slightly, he added, "How did you two end up at the same school, anyway?"
"This one's close enough and affordable enough," Xion said. "Plus Zexion wants to transfer to the med school and eventually work around here somewhere."
"Well, that seems reasonable," Axel agreed, "but then why did you come here? You didn't take the chance to finally get away from him?"
"I didn't really care whether he was here. I wanted to come here," she answered. "Of my own accord."
"Brave," Axel muttered. He glanced back down at his notes. Truthfully, with her here, he'd almost forgotten that he needed meds. He'd almost been able to put yesterday's incident out of his mind. Almost. Had he not looked at Demyx's scratched-out writing on the desk in front of him, he probably would have been able to let it go completely.
With that thought, he slammed the notebook shut and looked up at Xion. "Hey, what do you say to going for a walk outside for a little while?"
"What?" Xion looked surprised. "Just the two of us?"
"Yeah," Axel said. "What do you think? Want to go?" He flashed a grin.
Xion hesitated. After a few seconds—during which Axel's palms started to sweat and he wondered whether he'd made a mistake and whether the gates of hell were going to open up under his chair—she shrugged and said, "Sure."
"Yes," Axel exclaimed. "I mean, great. Let's get outta here." He shoved both his and Demyx's notes into his backpack and threw the bag over his shoulder. Xion followed him as he set off for the library doors, feeling as if his feet didn't touch the ground.