Well, look what we have here! A new chapter! :D I realize it's been a while for this story.
I gotta say, it was nice coming back to this one. I've missed Aelin's story, especially since we're getting to the good stuff now ;)
Before we get into it, there are 2 songs in this story and they are 2 completely opposite songs, I will say! The first one, I'm assuming everyone knows xD some of the lyrics have been changed for the purpose of the story and the character and the song on the video starts at about 1:13 ( watch?v=UgFpHs5dGdg)
the second one, most of you may know and the title of this one is also the title of the chapter :) ( watch?v=2zD-zXZdvyQ)
So now...have fun! :)
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The late hour of the night was unknown to Aelin and frankly, she didn't care. All joy or hope she once thought she had was gone as she sat in the dungeons of Ered Luin, tears cascading from her eyes like a waterfall.
During her second day in prison, she had been visited by her friends Zedd, Rama, Kardur and Jéka. She had been glad to see them when the guard announced she had visitors, thinking that they were there to get her out.
But sadly, that was not the case.
When she had expressed how pleased she was to see them, Zedd had simply laughed and replied, "You're mad if you think that's why we're here." Her disappointment only increased when he went on to explain, "You were given an ultimate challenge, Aelin, to prove your potential and ensure your place amongst us…which you failed. You were caught by the King and his guards and put into prison. A good thief never gets caught…which means your skills are not good enough for us. We only came to bid you farewell…for you are no longer one of us and you shall never see us again."
With that simple explanation, her former friends had left her there. Even Jéka, who had been more her friend than the others, wouldn't do anything for her. Aelin begged her not to abandon her, but Zedd had ordered Jéka to follow and she had to obey.
Aelin had been abandoned by friends before, but this group of friends had been with her the longest and she truly thought she had found a place with them; a place where she belonged…and now even they had abandoned her. Their betrayal felt worse than any of the ones she had been through in the past and now she felt completely alone.
She was now on her third day in the prison. Whenever she was awake, all she could do was weep from the emptiness and solitude she was experiencing and, in order to escape those dreadful feelings, she slept. Even then, it wasn't enough. She had been alone since she was a child and no matter how hard she tried, she could never find a place to belong or anyone who could truly care for her.
As she wallowed in her sorrow in the corner of her cell for hours, she felt her spite towards the Dwarf King continuing to gnaw at her. It was his fault that she was in that cell and his fault that her friends had left her! She blamed him for her suffering. He was the reason she felt herself drifting away from her true self. Whoever she had been three days before, she wasn't that woman anymore. No one could ever care about her, she knew that now. He had ruined her chance at finding a place to belong and for that, she despised him.
She had given up. She was going to spend her life in this cell, because Oakenshield had told her he was never going to let her out. And if she ever did get out, she had nowhere to go and no one to go to. It seemed to her that she was destined to be alone.
One last time, Aelin opened her mouth as she felt her Dwarven instincts kick in and her voice prepared to sing one last song…for she knew that, after this, she would never find the heart to sing again.
Where once was light, now darkness falls.
Where once was love, love is no more.
Don't say goodbye.
Don't say I didn't try...
These tears I cry are falling rain
For all the lies you told me.
The hurt, the blame!
And I will weep to be so alone.
I am lost…I can never go home.
So in the end I will be what I will be.
No loyal friend was ever there for me.
Now I say goodbye.
I say you didn't try...
These tears I cry have come too late.
Take back the lies.
The hurt, the blame!
And I will weep when I face the end alone
I am lost…I can never go home.
I am lost…I can never go home.
With her final word, Aelin swore she would never sing again.
"Well, I say, that was quite the melancholic tune, dear girl!"
She jumped at the sound of another voice speaking to her. It was dark and she could not see his face, but the torchlight from behind him illuminated his silhouette. He had a very peculiar hairstyle with three distinct bumps that made his head look star-shaped. To her recollection, she had never seen this Dwarf before.
The stranger turned to the guards nearest her cell and lifted a pouch in the air. "You will find her bail is now posted, lads," he said. "Now let her out, if you don't mind."
One of the guards took the pouch, peeked inside it and then gave the other a nod of approval. The other guard unlocked the cell door, opened it and then said to Aelin, "You are free to go, girl. But mind you, should you ever steal from the King again, he will not show you the mercy of a cell."
"I didn't steal anything," she stated in a strained voice as she rose to her feet and slowly walked past him to the door.
For a moment, she was surprised. Only moments ago, she had given up hope of getting out and now, suddenly, here she was being bailed out by a stranger. It was happening so fast, she almost couldn't wrap her head around it all. She stole a glance at the stranger now that she could see his face. He had a beard of three large braids, light brown eyes and his eyebrows were long and braided up into his hair. Even still, she did not recognize him. The stranger laid a hand lightly on her back and led her down the hall.
When Aelin supposed they were out of earshot, she whispered to the unknown Dwarf, "Who are you? What do you want?"
"Wait until we're outside, Aelin," he replied.
Now she felt more uneasy hearing him say her name. How did this person know her? Why was he getting her out? But still, she kept silent like he said and continued to walk with him until they got outside. It was the middle of the night and so, naturally, it was dark and the only lights were the torches that lit the pathways and the walls. A single pony was tied up to a stake waiting for them.
As the doors to the dungeons were closed, Aelin whipped around to face the stranger right away. "All right, we are outside. Now I ask you again: who are you and what do you want? And how do you know my name?" she demanded.
In answer, he grinned, amused, and answered, "My name is Nori. I was in the pub three nights ago when you were arrested. I've had my eye on you and your friends for a little while now, I know you are thieves. I too am a thief; a master one, if I do say so myself. My interests get peaked when I spot young amateurs frolicking about."
"You've been spying on us?" Aelin asked.
He nodded. "Aye and I believe that your friends—"
"Former…friends," she spat, not wanting to be reminded of them.
"Apologies," he said, placing a hand over his chest and bowing his head to her. Then he finished his sentence, using the proper words, "I believe your former friends are wrong about you."
"What makes you think that?"
"I've watched you and I see your potential to be a good thief whereas your former companions; namely that arrogant sod, Zedd, could not see it. I watched you in the pub and I know everything that happened."
"So you know that I am innocent and never committed an actual crime?"
"I do, yes. But going to the King now will not change his mind, if that's what you're thinking. And it won't matter because you're out now; your bail has been paid and he can't come after you."
Aelin had to admit that, for a moment, she had indeed thought of having Nori go to Oakenshield and explain things to him, but he did have a point. Now that she was legally out of prison, Oakenshield couldn't come after her and try to lock her up again. She now could be free of him.
"Why did you bail me out? What do you want with me?" she then asked.
"I tailed your friends when I realized they were coming here, most likely to see you," he said. "I wanted to see what they would do. When I heard they no longer wanted you around, I knew I had to take this opportunity."
She was puzzled. "What opportunity?"
Nori grinned again. "I want to take you under my wing and teach you how to be a proper thief, something your associates couldn't do."
Aelin blinked in surprise. "You what?"
"I understand you may be uneasy taking such an offer from someone you don't know and I don't expect you to trust me right away," he explained, "but I promise you, I am a Dwarf of honor and mean you no harm or deception. I know you have been abandoned and left alone now and I wish to offer you something better: a chance to excel at the talents you have been given as well as a place to stay, seeing as how you have none."
A soft gasp escaped Aelin's mouth at Nori's proposition. She almost couldn't believe a word he was saying. He was offering to teach her how to be a better thief and he was giving her a place to stay? This seemed almost too good to be true.
"You do not need to give me an answer right away," Nori went on, "but at least, let me take you to my home—or rather, my brother's home—tonight. After three days in a cell, you deserve to have a decent night's rest on a good bed and wake to a hearty meal in the morning. I promise, my intentions are noble and I mean you no ill will."
It took her a moment or two to wrap her head around how kind Nori was being to her, seeing as how hardly anyone had been as such to her before. It amazed her and almost scared her at the same time. This was something so new to her and she didn't want to be too trusting again…but yet, when she looked in his eyes, there appeared to be something rather genuine. If his intentions weren't truly as he claimed they were, she at any rate knew how to defend herself, if necessary…but she thought she would at least give him a chance.
"Why me?" she asked.
He simply shrugged and answered, "As I said, I see your potential. I've been intrigued by what I've seen of you and I want to give you a chance for something better that I think you deserve."
That was an answer she supposed she could accept. "Very well, I will accept your offer…and perhaps, I will accept your offer to be my teacher in time," she responded. "Just get me away from here."
With that being said, Nori helped Aelin up onto his pony, climbed into the saddle behind her and they rode away from the dungeons. It was then Aelin bade farewell forever to the prison of Ered Luin and fully welcomed her dominating hatred of Thorin Oakenshield, all the while praying that she would never have to encounter him again.
"Come on, Aelin! We must go, Thorin is expecting us!"
It had been two days since the company had arrived in Rivendell; since Aelin and Thorin had chosen to put the past behind them and begin anew as friends. The two of them had spent a little time together each day in Aelin's room while her injuries continued to heal, either just having pleasant conversations or playing games like chess, getting to know more about one another.
They hadn't told the company right away of their change; they wanted to act civilly to each other in front of everyone and see what their reaction would be. Suffice it to say, they were nothing short of astonished. Some of them did double-takes, others' jaws dropped; Dori had spit out his tea and ended up spraying Nori in the face. Nori, however, felt rather proud. He had hoped that making Thorin carry Aelin to Rivendell when she got injured would get them started down the right path that would get them to this point and it delighted him to see that his plan had worked. Fili and Kili had pumped their fists and cheered, proclaiming their gladness that Thorin and Aelin wouldn't endlessly and pointlessly fight anymore and drive them all crazy. When the others got over the initial shock, then they had joined in the celebrating for they were as equally thankful. Dwalin was a little tentative at first, having been very suspicious and reserved about her for quite some time because of Thorin, but after seeing that Thorin was keen on getting along with her, he supposed that perhaps he should give Aelin a chance, same as Thorin was.
Today, Fili and Kili were going to join them on a picnic and they were no less than anxious about it. They had come to Aelin's room to collect her and get her down to the perfect spot they had found and were wanting to be quick about it, being as excited as they were. More than anything, they were more excited about the fact that Thorin and Aelin were no longer fighting and were trying to be friends.
"All right, you two, all right!" Aelin replied through a laugh as she moved herself over to the side of the bed for them to help her. "There's no need to rush, we have plenty of time and I'm sure Thorin won't mind waiting a few minutes." Even after two days, saying Thorin's actual name was still something she was getting used to. Having called him "Oakenshield" for so long, it was almost foreign still to her.
She then realized that the wheelbarrow they normally transported her in was not in the room. "Where is the wheelbarrow?"
"We thought that perhaps you could try walking to see how your leg is doing," suggested Kili.
Aelin was a bit nervous about it, but she thought that perhaps, now that it had been a couple of days, it was perhaps time to give it a try. When she stood up from the bed, she was only able to take a couple of steps before her leg gave way beneath her. Luckily, Fili was close to her and was able to catch her before she stumbled to the ground.
"It looks like it's not quite time yet, lads," she pointed out.
"Well, it was worth a try," said Kili with a shrug.
"No matter," said Fili as he proceeded to then lift Aelin up into his arms, making her cry out in surprise. "I will carry her, then."
Kili then picked up the basket which had all the food in it and said, "Then let us be off!"
"Fili, is this really necessary?" asked Aelin with a smirk. "You really do not have to do this."
"Yes, it absolutely necessary," he enthusiastically replied. When she rolled her eyes at him, he chuckled and then said, "I really do not mind."
She grinned and shook her head at the young Dwarf as he walked out the door. "How you don't have a young lady in your life, Fili, with your charm and wit, I will never understand," she declared.
"What about me?" asked Kili, pretending to look offended.
"My statement applies to you, as well, Kili," added Aelin, nodding to him, which made him perk back up.
Fili shrugged a shoulder and said in response, "I am simply waiting to use my wit and charm on the right woman." Then he winked subtly at Aelin.
"Ah, ah!" she stated, shaking her head and playfully tapping him on the nose. "I already told you: I'm too old for you."
"I'm only joking," he whispered, smirking.
"But you're not too old for Thorin!" cried Kili, raising his eyebrows suggestively.
Aelin's head dropped back and she rolled her eyes again. Somehow she knew Kili was bound to say something like that eventually. "All right, I know you're glad that your uncle and I have reconciled and are not constantly at each other's throats anymore," she told him, "but that was only two days ago. Don't start us on that path already!"
"I'm just saying...," Kili said defensively, "you and Thorin are a lot alike. You're both stubborn in your ways, yet you care deeply for others that are close to you. You both have been through much in your lives and I've seen you derive strength from each other these past couple days. I think it's only a matter of time before something happens, you realize your similarities and you'll begin to see each other differently."
Aelin said nothing and just rolled her eyes again...because she wasn't going to admit that, in truth, she already was beginning to see Thorin differently.
There had been tiny moments off and on since the start of the journey that she had found herself abnormally attracted to him, but she waved it off every time whenever they were fighting. But now that they were actually getting along and he was kinder to her, she was seeing a whole new Thorin; one she, for a time, never believed actually existed and one that she now found herself strangely drawn to. He was kind, considerate and was trying his hardest to rectify things between them after behaving rather harshly towards her since the start of the journey. She could tell he truly felt remorseful about how he had treated her and was ever so careful in helping look after her along with the others. It was refreshing seeing that side of him and that was what made her deeply buried attraction to him resurface.
She also found her mind wandering back to the Trollshaws…when she and Thorin had shared their sudden passionate moment together. She remembered feeling enthused by his passions and she couldn't look at him the same that day. Now, whenever they were together and she looked into his eyes, she remembered that moment when he had first kissed her and secretly wished that it could happen again. However, she knew that most likely was never going to happen. Yes, they were getting along now, but she doubted that he felt anything remotely romantic towards her.
And why would he? Aelin was nothing; a no one…and certainly not worthy of the affections of Thorin Oakenshield, but she knew better. She knew not to get her hopes up because she knew if she did and what she believed turned out to be true, she would be hurt yet again just like she'd been hurt countless times in getting her hopes up about finding people who cared about her. She had a feeling that the company was starting to care about her, but she just knew that it was only a matter of time before they abandoned her like everyone else had before them.
However, that still didn't change the fact that Aelin found herself slowly falling for Thorin.
She found that she was excited just thinking about seeing him for the picnic. She had never experienced anything like this before and it was strange to her yet she realized that she liked it. Although, she figured that she wouldn't admit any of this to anyone in the company for they certainly would never let her hear the end of it. Nori would, at most, be the only one she would tell. For one, he was her best friend and she told him almost everything and he also was already beginning to suspect her feelings. He had already suspected it when she initially told him about Thorin kissing her in the forest and he told her that her heart probably felt differently for Thorin than what she thought in her mind. Nori would visit Aelin while she was bedridden and would ask about how things were going between her and Thorin, so he knew at least that things were going well.
But she knew that if she didn't tell someone about her feelings for Thorin and soon, she would surely explode.
A few minutes passed until Aelin, Fili and Kili reached their designated picnic spot, which was on a little grassy veranda overlooking a collection of small waterfalls, surrounded by trees. There was also a lone wooden chaise with cream-colored cushions underneath the shade of the tree. It was a beautiful area in a small corner of Rivendell, perfect for relaxing.
"Here we are!" exclaimed Kili, increasing his speed just slightly so he could get to the grassy area quickly.
"This is the spot you two found?" Aelin asked, amazed at what she saw.
"Yes! Isn't it perfect?" Kili asked in response, his arms outstretched to his sides to show off their triumphant find.
She chuckled and answered, "I daresay, you lads did well. This looks very peaceful."
Kili grinned, looking very pleased with himself. Then he looked around and mumbled, "I wonder where Thorin is. He should be here by now."
Fili motioned to the chaise in front of them and told Aelin, "That is for you."
"Me?" she asked.
"Aye…a throne for the lady," he replied.
Aelin just scoffed at him. "I don't know if you've noticed, Fili, but I am not much of a lady and certainly not one worthy enough for a throne," she told him.
"Oh, I think you underestimate yourself, Aelin," he said to her as he carefully dropped her from his arms and onto the chaise.
"Come now, lad, I am barely a lady. I may look like one with my facial features, but I hardly act like a lady nor do I dress like one."
"That does not change the fact that you are still an amazing woman and a beautiful one at that."
Aelin lowered her head, hoping Fili wouldn't see her blushing. She was seldom called "beautiful" in her lifetime, so it was a compliment she usually never expected.
Kili popped up next to his brother and added with a bright smile, "I agree with Fili!"
"Oh, lads…!" she groaned, her face growing a little warmer.
"I agree with him, as well."
They heard Thorin's voice and Aelin looked up to see him slowly strutting towards them, a large burlap sack slung over his shoulder. He wasn't wearing his leather and fur coat like he normally did. Instead it was just his armor and the blue tunic he wore underneath and his trousers. His eyes were on Aelin and her face instantly grew hot, blushing a darker shade of red and she could feel it deep in her skin. Shyly, she looked down for a brief moment and then looked back up at him again. He hadn't said the words directly, but he had agreed with Fili's comment about her being beautiful. She was sure he meant it in just a friendly way, however, that didn't stop her from reacting like an infatuated young girl, which she hoped he didn't see.
"Gods, I have never acted this way in my life," she chided herself. "How does he do this to me?"
"There you are, Uncle," said Fili, giving Thorin's shoulder a hearty pat as he approached after setting his bag against the tree.
"Forgive my tardiness," he asked of them. "I was temporarily delayed."
Kili chuckled, crouched next to Aelin and nudged her with his elbow and said teasingly, "Meaning, on his way here, he lost his way twice."
At his comment, Aelin couldn't help but laugh, remembering Thorin's excuse for arriving late to the meeting back in Bag-End.
Thorin gave his nephew a mock warning glance. "Mind your tongue, Kili," he told him.
"Oh, Uncle, you know I jest," the young Dwarf said back.
"Perhaps a little too much for my taste," Thorin commented.
"Relax, Thorin," Aelin interjected, giving a casual wave of her hand. "He is young and full of gusto! Let him share his enthusiasm while he still has it."
"Always quick to defend my nephews, you are, Aelin," he pointed out. He too was still getting used to actually calling her by her name, seeing as how he never once called her by name in all the time he knew or in all the time they had been traveling together. He had to admit that it was rather pleasant to say.
Fili then decided to end the conversation by saying, "Well, we can either continue this quite rousing discussion or we can all sit down and eat the food we have brought for our picnic! What say you all?"
Aelin was the first to answer, "I don't know about all of you, but I am starving! Let's feast!"
Their picnic consisted of warm bread, fruit, wine and some cooked sausage they luckily managed to procure from Bombur. As they ate, Fili and Kili kept trying to toss some grapes into each other's mouths and missed more often than they actually caught them, but whenever they missed, they just laughed and tried again. They kept making Thorin and Aelin laugh, as well. Aelin was glad for their ever present cheerfulness that always made her smile and laugh and she was glad that they put in effort to make her feel better or entertain her while she was still healing. Thorin didn't say or do as much; he merely ate and commented every so often on Fili and Kili's silliness to Aelin.
Soon after they were finished eating, Dwalin found them and invited them all to join the rest of them for a swim in a nearby pool. Fili and Kili were quick to jump up and say yes, but Aelin politely declined, saying that she thought she should get some rest. Thorin declined as well and offered to help Aelin back to her room. With that being decided, Fili and Kili both kissed Aelin on top of her head, making her snicker amusedly, and bade her and Thorin goodbye before sprinting off after Dwalin.
"This may be the only time I will ever say this," Thorin said after they left, "but I am glad you disobeyed me."
Aelin was very confused. "I...don't understand," she said.
"I ordered you to stay away from my nephews from the start and I don't believe you listened to me once," Thorin explained. But then his lips slightly flinched upward into a tiny grin. "But...I must admit: I am glad you didn't. Fili and Kili both seem to really adore you. I do not think I've seen them show that much devotion to another woman apart from their mother."
Aelin chuckled. "Well, Fili did tell me before we left the Shire that I remind him of his mother," she told him.
"Did he now?"
"Aye, I believe his words were that I'm 'a feisty one like his mother. Not afraid to speak my mind, stubborn; a spitfire, for sure.'"
Thorin sniggered at hearing her tell him his nephew's remarks about his sister. "Yes, that would be an accurate description of my sister, Dis," he commented. "They highly revere her."
"I should hope so," she commented. "She is their mother; she deserves to be held in their highest regard. Especially since I can tell she raised them right."
"She certainly did," he said proudly.
"I'm sure you had a hand in how they turned out, as well."
He shook his head. "All I have done is teach them how to fight. Their personalities, behavior and manners, they did not get from me."
A crooked smile turned up on her face. "I don't believe that's true."
Thorin was pleased to hear Aelin say that to make him feel better about himself and he gave her a grateful look in return. "What of your mother?" he then asked her.
Right away, her contented expression faded and she turned her eyes away. "I take it your nephews didn't tell you…," she answered.
"Tell me what?" he asked.
Deep down, she knew she had to tell him about her mother. Honestly, she had thought that Fili and Kili would've told him by now since they had wanted her to in the first place, but then, knowing how gentlemanly and respectful they were, maybe they had chosen not to say anything, knowing that it was her business. She at least was thankful for that, but still dreaded the fact that now she had to talk about the subject.
She exhaled sharply and made known to him the simple story of her mother with a hint of disdain in her voice, "My mother ended up with child; with me out of wedlock. When the Dwarf who would've been my father found out…he abandoned her. Then after I was born, she gave me away to her brother and his wife, who had no children, and left me the same way my father left her." With a pained look in her eyes, she looked right intently at Thorin. "She wanted nothing to do with me. My own mother did not want her own child and she gave me up like I was something she regretted buying from the market. I meant nothing to her."
Hearing the sad account of her mother made Thorin feel awful about asking about it. He could never imagine why any female Dwarf would want to give up her child and he certainly couldn't imagine abandoning a woman that he had impregnated. Whoever Aelin's father was, he undoubtedly was an honorless coward of a Dwarf who should have accepted the consequences of his reckless behavior and helped raise Aelin as a child. If he hadn't left her mother, then perhaps they could have been a family and Aelin would have had a better life. Or, at least, a life where she never had to live on the streets.
"I…I am sorry, Aelin," he whispered, unable to think of the right words he could say to her. "I did not mean to…."
"Think nothing of it," Aelin told him, shaking her head and giving a dismissive wave of her hand. Then, to quickly change the subject, her eyes darted over to the sack he had brought and had set by the tree. "What is that in the bag?" she asked him, pointing to it.
He turned his attention to the bag, stood up and walked over to it. "A gift for you…from Lord Elrond," was the answer he gave her. Then he picked up the bag and brought it over to the chaise, sitting down beside her and handing it to her.
Curiously, Aelin took the bag from Thorin's hands and pulled out what was inside. It was a long wooden rod that had been dyed green with what appeared to be small Dwarven runes and border drawings around it.
"A walking stick?" she asked rhetorically, running her hand over the smooth wooden surface, admiring the craftsmanship of it.
"Your arm is mending well, but your leg is taking a little more time. He thought it would be useful as part of your healing process," he explained to her.
"It's beautiful," she stated. "But why would it have Dwarven runes and drawings on it if Elrond had this made?"
Thorin then replied, "He is knowledgeable of Dwarvish languages and culture. Perhaps he felt you would be more comfortable with something with a semblance to your race and had it made as such."
Something about that still seemed a little odd to Aelin, but then Thorin pointed out to her that there was a saying written in the runes. She turned it over and read what it said.
"Every new journey begins with the first step."
"A beautiful proverb," she commented.
Thorin then stood up from the chaise and held out a hand to her. When Aelin looked up at him with a puzzled look, he said to her, "What say you we give it a try?"
Aelin grew a bit tense at the suggestion, remembering how hard it had been for her to even take a couple steps earlier that morning. It was still difficult for her to keep herself up and she didn't want to make a fool of herself in front of him.
"I…I don't know…," she nervously replied. "I tried to walk again when Fili and Kili got me earlier and it's still difficult for me."
"But you did not have this," said Thorin, gesturing to the walking stick. "This way you will have something sturdy that can hold you up and you can lean on as you regain your strength to walk."
"I thought that's what I had you and all the other lads for," Aelin said to him wittily.
Thorin grinned and shook his head at her. He made a back and forth motion with his fingers and said, "Come now, Aelin. You must at least try. And I am here, I will help you."
She looked up at his face and felt her apprehension slowly melt away as he was staring at her with a very sympathetic and kindhearted look. Even after two days, she still found herself growing accustomed to such looks from him, having been used to receiving his hateful glares for days.
As she took his hand and he helped her stand, she informed him, "I must say, I am still getting used to you being so kind to me."
"As I am still getting used to you actually cooperating with me," he replied, raising his eyebrows teasingly.
In response, she gently nudged him in the arm with her elbow. She had to admit, she found their teasing to one another quite fun when it wasn't to get under each other's skin but to just have fun.
"Well…here I go…," she then stated, trying to sound confident.
Her grip on the walking stick tightened and she readied herself for what she believed would be inevitable failure and humiliation. She took one step on her good leg and then inhaled deeply, getting ready to use her injured leg. She leaned, put her weight against the walking stick and stepped forward with her other leg. Sure enough, there was a stinging pain that shot up her leg and it gave way beneath her. With a slight cry, she started to go down, but Thorin was quick to her side and caught her arm, helping keep her up.
Shaking her head, Aelin said to him, "I can't, Thorin. My leg is not strong enough yet."
"Aelin, it will never get strong enough if you do not practice being on foot again," Thorin explained to keep her from giving up. "If you continue being carried or wheeled around everywhere, then you will not build up the strength you need to heal and be able to walk on it again." He helped her straighten up, keeping a firm yet gentle hold on her arm. "Try it again now. I will help you keep your balance."
She looked to him as he said that, her uneasiness evident in her forest green eyes. However, he gave her a comforting look and his sapphire blue eyes reflected the relief she was looking for.
"Trust me," he said, moving his hand down her arm and taking her hand in his.
There was something inside Aelin that almost let the words "I do trust you" escape her lips, but she found herself lacking the ability to speak. No one aside from Nori, Dori and Ori had ever willingly chosen or even wanted to help her with anything. Even now, it still surprised her whenever that happened with anyone. And, even though in most cases, she wasn't very quick to trust others, she found she had come to trust Thorin quicker than she expected and that surprised her most of all; this Dwarf, whom only days ago, she would never have trusted with anything was now becoming one of the only people she trusted more than anyone.
So she simply nodded in understanding and, with the knowledge that Thorin was at her side, repositioned her hold on the walking stick with one hand and held onto his hand securely with the other. She began to walk slowly forward, keeping a firm grip on the stick and Thorin's hand to keep herself up. It was a little trying at first with the sore pain that kept flaring up in her leg whenever she took a step, but after a few minutes, it started to dull a little. All she could do was limp for a while, but then her walking grew slightly steadier as she got used to the light pain in her leg.
"You are doing well, Aelin," Thorin told her, giving her a reassuring squeeze of the hand.
Just after he said that, they could hear a bit of a commotion going on nearby. It sounded like it was coming from the rest of the company, so Thorin suggested to Aelin that they should go see what was going on, to which she agreed. He led her along towards the source of the noise until they rounded a corner and found themselves faced with a sight that stopped them in their tracks.
A few yards away was a large Elvish fountain and they could see all of the Dwarves were inside it, either sliding into the water from the top of the fountain or pushing each other off of one another's shoulders. However…they all were completely naked.
"I…am ready to go back to my room now," groaned Aelin as she slowly turned away, wide-eyed and horrified at what she had just seen.
"I agree, let's go," Thorin immediately responded, carefully guiding her away.
It only took a few minutes for them to get back to Aelin's room. Once they got inside the room and closed the door, Thorin helped her over to the bed and then took the walking stick once she was sitting down and laid it against the wall.
"Well, I am positive I'm never getting any sleep tonight…," Aelin commented as she put her forehead to the heel of her hand, trying to erase the memory of seeing twelve completely exposed Dwarves.
"Believe me, neither am I," Thorin replied as he sat down in a wooden chair next to the bed.
"Not that I have gotten much sleep to begin with," she half-mumbled, fidgeting with her hands.
"Why is that?" he asked.
She sighed and said, "I am constantly plagued with nightmares or bad dreams…."
"What sort of nightmares?"
"They are usually all the same…I have dreams where I'm trapped…in an endless void of darkness and I can hear voices taunting me, saying how I'm alone, no one loves or cares about me or I don't belong anywhere. They tell me I am no one or I am nothing and I'll forever be just the scum of the earth that I've convinced myself that I am…overall, I see in my worst dreams my deepest, darkest fear: of being alone…forever…and it has haunted me for a long time."
Thorin could not find the words to convey how sorry he felt for her. Hearing of her darkest dreams turned his stomach into a knot and his chest began to twinge inside with pity for her. He hadn't ever felt completely alone before, but there were times where he found he was secluding himself from others when he felt that not everyone could understand the things he was going through. He never feared being alone, but he could see the sadness in Aelin's eyes just talking about it and he began to understand that she truly did fear being alone. Unfortunately, he couldn't say he knew how she felt to help her feel better, but he thought there was something else he could say.
"I too have been plagued many nights with frightful dreams," he told her. "In my dreams, I see fire and I can hear the echoing screams of my dying people along with the roar of a dragon."
"The day Smaug attacked Erebor…," she stated.
He nodded in affirmation. "I have relived that terrible day many nights over. I see the stone walls crumbling to the ground and the winged shadow of the beast soaring over my head while I am confined to where I stand, helpless. I see a once great kingdom reduced to ashes…destroyed and desolate."
"Then why are you going back?" she asked. This was a question that had actually been on her mind a few times before. "Why would you go back when you know that it's basically destroyed and that it's dangerous with a dragon waiting there? From what I understand, you had a fairly good life in the Blue Mountains; a life of peace and plenty. Why would you give all of that up to go on this…journey to the past; to a place you once knew that you may not be able to save?"
Thorin's eyes lowered down to the floor as he contemplated how to properly answer her question. There was so much he could say; so many reasons he could give as to why all of this was so important to him. But he wanted her to fully understand not just his practical reasons, but his mind and his heart regarding the matter.
At last, he gave his answer, proclaiming, "It is true, my family and my people and I had a decent life in Ered Luin…but no matter how peaceful or content it was, it was never home to me. The Dwarves of Erebor were meant for much more and that was taken from us. Nowhere else in the world could ever feel like home to me the way Erebor did. I would see the days return where all Dwarves in Middle-Earth could find refuge in our vast halls. I would drive the dragon from the mountain and rebuild a home not only for those who once dwelled there before, but for all. This 'journey to the past', as you say it is, is not just about defeating the dragon and taking back my kingdom. It is about restoring hope to those who have lost it all and giving back a true home to the homeless. I am not doing this to gain glory for myself. I do it to gain glory for my people and for all Dwarves in Middle-Earth…because sometimes, you must first look back to the past in order to press forward to the future."
Aelin was left speechless after hearing Thorin's compelling speech. The conviction and passion in his deep, baritone voice was undeniable; this entire quest and its purpose meant the world to him and there was nothing that would stop him from seeing it through. Aelin remembered how, before she was called upon by Gandalf to join, she had thought that the quest was nothing but a suicide mission. There had been times even recently where she still wondered just what they were doing or why they were doing this…but now she could accurately see the purpose behind the journey and why every member of the company was willing to give their all for the sake of its success.
Even though she had found herself moved by his words, she still wondered about a few other things. "I can understand why you or Balin and Dwalin are doing this, because you lived in Erebor before," she explained, "but then you called upon other Dwarves to help you; Dwarves who never lived there, like Nori and his brothers and me. That is what I don't understand. Why would you think that we would even care to help take back a home that was never ours?"
Then, to her slight surprise, Thorin smiled at her. "Because, as I said before, Erebor was once a place that was a refuge for all Dwarves and I intend to make it so again," he answered straightforwardly. "When all of this is over, should any of them desire, all members of the company would have a place in Erebor." Then the kind expression on his face softened even more. "It would be a true home…to those who have never had one."
Somehow, Aelin knew that Thorin's last comment was directed towards her. There was no one else in the company that was that way. It touched her heart to hear him say that; to voice such a promise to her. Just the thought of even having a real home for once…it seemed just too good to be true and she could feel her heart swelling within her.
"So…you are saying that…at the end of this journey…even I could have place in Erebor?" she asked in amazed disbelief.
He gave a single nod in response and said to her softly, "Aye…and perhaps you may find that Erebor is where you really belong. There, you may just find all the answers you've been seeking your whole life."
Once again, she was at a loss for words, too overwhelmed with astonishment at the mere prospect of having a place where she could truly belong and never feel alone again. That was something she had only dreamt of for so long. It had seemed like only yesterday that she was a younger Dwarf woman who had been abandoned by her four friends whom she had trusted and thought had cared about her, and now here she was, surrounded by a group of kindhearted Dwarves as well as a Hobbit and a wizard, and now being told by the Dwarf King himself that she would gain everything her heart had ever desired.
How was this all happening to her?
Seeing the stunned amazement in her expression, Thorin knew he had said all he needed to say and decided that he would take his leave. "I shall leave you now so that you may rest," he told her, lightly touching her shoulder as he stood up and made his way to the door.
"Thorin…!" Aelin called out. When he turned back to her, her mouth turned upward into a smile; perhaps the brightest one Thorin had ever seen from her. "Thank you…," she told him, "…for giving me something to believe in."
He said nothing but simply grinned kindly and bowed his head in response before opening the door and leaving the room.
A tumult of emotions crashed over Aelin once Thorin left: joy, shock, bewilderment, wonder and even a small hint of confusion. There was no possible way all of this could be happening. It seemed as though her wildest dreams would come true in the near future and none of it seemed real for a moment.
Just then, a familiar swell of bliss rose up within her; one that she had not felt in a hundred and forty-two years, to be exact. It was something she never thought she would feel again and the urges she felt were ones she had suppressed so long ago…and had now suddenly returned.
Aelin reached out, took hold of her new walking stick, slowly rose up from the bed, opened her mouth…and began to sing.
Heart don't fail me now,
Courage don't desert me,
Don't turn back now that we're here.
People always say
Life is full of choices,
No one ever mentions fear
Or how the world can seem so vast
On a journey to the past.
Suddenly, she felt the urge to look out the window of her room. As quickly as she could, she hobbled over to the window and gazed outside. Down below, she saw Thorin and she watched as he walked away, feeling grateful for what he had said and in that moment, she knew her feelings for him were only growing even stronger.
Somewhere down this road,
I know someone's waiting.
Years of dreams just can't be wrong.
Arms will open wide,
I'll be safe and wanted,
Finally home where I belong.
Well. starting now I'm learning fast
On this journey to the past.
Home, love, family.
There was once a time I must have had them too.
Home, love, family.
I will never be complete until I find you.
One step at a time,
One hope, then another.
Who knows where this road may go?
Back to who I was,
Onto find my future,
Things my heart still needs to know.
Yes, let this be a sign,
Let this road be mine,
Let it lead me to my past
And bring me home
At last!
As Aelin's first song in a hundred and forty-two years concluded, she threw her arms out to her sides and let herself fall backwards onto her bed, a bright smile almost permanently imprinted upon her face.
And then, for possibly the first time in her life, she knew that perhaps there was hope for her future.
.
I've had the idea for that second song in my mind for SO long and man, am I happy I finally got to put it in! :D for once, Aelin is actually feeling happy and hopeful. Isn't that wonderful?
Now the question is...how long will it last?
Just you wait, my friends! There is more to come; more twists and turns, some you will never see coming xD How do you think Thorin and Aelin's new friendship will progress? Do you think Thorin feels the same about Aelin or does he only view her as a friend right now? What are your thoughts on this or anything else in the story?
Any questions or comments? Please tell me in a review or PM! I really want to hear from all of you :)
Until next time! :D