A/N: I just wanted to thank all of the followers and those who have favorited this story. I have wanted to write a HP fic for so long, but I never like to mess with the already existing storyline too much. I own nothing except my own original characters.
The first few chapters will focus on Olivia's growing up, being a bit like a set of important memories, if you will. The story will be much more solid once she starts school.
Outofthisworldgal: Thanks :) I hope you enjoy the development. Right now, I don't have any plans of including Harry much until much later on since this will mostly be from the view points of Olivia and Severus. My plan is to create some filling of gaps in the story and not really mess too much with Rowling's ideas.
LittleReader-Chan: Thank you :) Enjoy! I plan on posting once a week.
The early morning hour drew on, the letter still clutched in his hand. Severus pushed himself up from the floor. When he first saw her, he had looked at her as a child of Potter. Now that he knew that wasn't the case at all, that in fact, this baby was his...his and Lily's, he needed to see her.
Olivia was still sleeping soundly. Her black hair contrasted perfectly against her fair skin, though it was still reddened from birth. Her features were definitely Lily's, but she would definitely have his coloring. He desperately wanted to know what color her eyes were, but didn't dare wake her. He saw Lily, but he also saw himself; she was the combination of them, proof of the love he had for her. She was so small. What did he know of babies? He didn't have a caring instinct; in fact, it was instinct to be cruel and guarded. How could he possibly raise a child on his own?
Sensing that familiar presence in the room again, he didn't know what to say other than exactly what was on his mind. "How am I to take care of her alone?"
"You're never alone, my boy," Albus said. "You may feel you are, but you have people who care about you."
"Lily is gone." He forced the words out, his voice grinding as he did.
"I'm afraid so," the wizard said, rounding the cradle to look upon her again. "But she's left you a wonderful gift, Severus. This child will love you unconditionally, perhaps even help heal some of your pain. I will do everything that I can to help you. Being a parent is, I'm told, one of life's toughest roads, but it's also the happiest." The headmaster watched the young man before him, seeing his mind working through exhaustion. "You've had a very hard night, Severus. I will look after her if you wish to go get some rest. We can talk more later."
Severus didn't want to leave so soon, but he had to agree that he needed to sleep. He just nodded before reluctantly pulling away from the cradle, forcing himself through the door and across the castle towards the dungeons.
Before he could take a vial of Dreamless Sleep, he folded her letter and put it back inside it's envelope. He went to his desk, opening the drawer towards the bottom right side. The box was almost 14 years old, the corners worn and the papery covering starting to peel at the edges. He pulled the top off, seeing the few photos and items inside, letters, drawings, and a dried flower from the park where they met. He placed the letter inside and closed it without looking too closely at anything or he would be there all night in pain.
With school still being in session, Albus kept watch over Olivia during the day while Severus had classes. He said that it would be best to have her near, not just for safety, but also for him to adjust and bond with the child. It would also provide him with time to figure out his future plans. What would he do for the next school year?
Nights were hard. Olivia woke every two and a half hours on the dot. She was so small to him, her tiny hands just barely grasping one of his fingers. Many times, even after he fed and changed her, she would cry unless she was put to his chest. He couldn't bear to hear her cries so he slept only lightly, upright in his bed. Every time she would move, he would wake fully. He'd never been so grateful for Pepper Up potions.
The holiday came quickly, the air becoming chilly in the dungeons. Severus enjoyed the cold while he slept, but kept the fireplace going anyway. Most of the students had gone by then, especially being the first holiday after the Dark Lord's demise, and only a bare few students stayed behind.
Albus had felt the need to add a small tree in Severus's quarters. It was a small touch, a short sprucey thing covered with sparkling tinsel. The tree was bare beneath, no presents yet to fill the space. He was there, holding Olivia who was fascinated by his lengthy silver beard.
"Why don't you bring her to the Christmas feast? It will just be the staff and the handful of students still remaining. Minerva and Pomona will probably keep her all to themselves," he laughed.
"And what will I tell them, Albus?" he asked, pinching the bridge of his hooked nose.
"The truth," he glanced over his spectacles, eyes twinkling as they often did. "Her mother has passed and you are the only living family she has."
"They will have questions."
"If it will make it easier on you, I can explain the situation to them beforehand." Albus turned his attention back to the girl. "My boy, she certainly takes after you. Those eyes and hair..."
Severus ignored the statement. At times, it made him proud that she did look so much like him, but other times, she pitied the girl to have been so unfortunate to have inherited his appearance. He only hoped she'd grow out of it or into it enough to pull it off. He hated his stringy hair and sickly pale skin, but he used it to his benefit, a way to induce fear and loathing in those who dared get close. Perhaps, his daughter would carry it well, a dark and mysterious beauty.
"Do what you will, Albus. It matters not; though, I would avoid all questions if I could."
"Wonderful," he said, obviously pleased at the idea. "It's settled then."
He was not looking forward to the feast. There was bound to be excitement over Olivia and the fact that he, the bat of the dungeons, had fathered the child. There would be questions, ones he did not want to answer.
Everything of Olivia's that Albus had found was sent to his quarters along with the cradle he had transfigured. Among her clothes, he found an emerald green dress. He wondered briefly if it was bought specifically with Slytherin green in mind, but surely Lily wouldn't purposefully put her in his house colors.
Carrying her down to the great hall, he took his time, calming his mind. He pulled his cold mask on before walking through the doors. At once, he saw Minerva stand, blatant joy plastered on her face. The woman absolutely adored children. She met him at his usual seat with her arms outstretched.
"Oh, Severus," she said in emotional awe, "she is an absolute treasure." Minerva pulled the baby into her arms, cradling her carefully. "What's her name?"
"Olivia Persephone," he said with his usual tone.
"I think you'll have a hard time getting her back, Severus," said the headmaster, laughing heartily. "Come, Minerva, at least sit down so Severus can eat."
"Oh, Albus." The witch put her hand to her chest. "She's so beautiful."
"I'm well aware, Minerva. Now, come sit down before Pomona jumps from her seat as well," he laughed.
Severus sat, forcing himself to ignore the stares coming from the few students and of the staff. Instead, he focused on his meal and half listened to the excitement further down the table.
"Aw!" Pomona cried. "Well, there's no denying she's Severus's child! She takes after him so well! And all that beautiful dark hair on such a young thing."
"Severus, I believe you will have your hands full by the time she's in school," Minerva chuckled. "Albus, we better be careful. He'll be hexing boys left and right," she joked. The headmaster joined in, laughing along with her.
"I am sure she will be perfectly able to hex them herself if I have anything to do with it," he offered. Any child of his would surely have the knowledge to hold their own. He was fully prepared to teach every cruel hex a young girl could get away with to her before she make it to her first year.
Minerva scoffed at this information, but turned to the little girl, "My sweet child, whatever shall we do with you? Hmm? Don't you mind grumpy ole Dad. I shall steal you away and make you a fierce little lioness in spite of him."
This caught his attention and he threw a dark glare at the Gryffindor witch. Surely, Lily would be laughing at the display. Severus was not amused and he finished his meal in silence.
Minerva did keep Olivia to herself the majority of the feast. As the rest of the students and staff went to their respectable towers and quarters, Minerva stayed behind, reluctant to give the child up. "Severus, do you have everything you need?" she asked him on a serious note.
He knew she had only the best intentions and he answered her without disdain. "I do for the time being, Minerva."
"If you need anything, anything at all, please do not hesitate to ask." Slowly, she transferred the child over into his arm, caressing her cheek with the backs of her fingers. "She truly is a beautiful child, Severus. I am overjoyed for you," she smiled at him, resting her hand on his arm before squeezing gently. "Happy Christmas."
Christmas morning was a quiet one. He woke to the sound of her shifting on his chest as she roused from her sleep. It was another long night with little rest. After a quick shot of Pepper Up, he called for a house-elf to get her bottle. Walking towards the overly shiny tree, he noticed some packages that had accumulated underneath.
Among them was Albus's usual gift of mead and a card from Lucius and Narcissa inviting him to their usual holiday dinner. He'd have to come up with some excuse. The other gifts were for Olivia. After putting her in her cradle, magically levitating her bottle, he began unwrapping the small packages. Minerva sent her a warm, green tartan, flannel blanket. Albus sent two: a knit cap and a copy of The Tales of Beedle the Bard. Pomona sent a wooden rattle and there was a copy of some muggle fairy tales from Charity.
He vanished the wrappings from the table and looked over to her cradle. She still suckled her bottle quietly. Slouching back, he drug a hand through his hair and sighed. He picked up the last gift, which was unwrapped, and tucked it into her cradle next to her. As her arm instinctively wrapped around the stuffed fawn, he whispered, "Happy Christmas."
It was New Year's Eve and he sat in front of the fire, Olivia nestled in the valley of his lap. She was perfectly content after having been fed, but also perfectly awake. He sighed in his exhaustion. She had managed to stay asleep for four hours, but was now wide awake with no sign of going back to sleep anytime soon.
"Why won't you sleep, child?" he rumbled. "Your mother would probably have you back to sleep in a matter of minutes." The thought pained his chest. "You've been fed, changed, held...what do you want, now?" Severus didn't care anymore how dumb he sounded to himself, talking to an almost nine week old infant.
Olivia smiled, her face scrunching into a toothless grin. A series of babbles spilled from her mouth, along with a little spit, which he wiped away quick enough. She kicked her feet and pulled her arms up as if reaching out to him. He leaned forward, a few strands of his hair falling from behind his ears and into her face, tickling her cheeks. She laughed, causing his eyes to widen slightly. He supposed it was as close to a laugh as she could get at her age. She jumped a bit when the bell of the clock started to chime.
Picking her up, he put her to his chest, letting his mouth rest to the top of her head. Soon after the twelfth chime, she began to yawn. Her warmth and gentle breathing calmed his thoughts of the past year.
What was it about this child? Was it the fact that she was his that made him far more patient? Any other child would make him cringe and sneer in annoyance and frustration. It was a miracle that he even made it through a school term. She was the only thing in the world that he felt any semblance of affection for. Maybe it was the fact that she was his daughter. She was his and he was hers. She needed him and it's possible he needed her, too. Perhaps it was because she was the last piece of Lily he had left.
The term was nearly over. It would soon be time to return to Spinner's End. Severus supposed he needed to start thinking of what to do when September came again. He didn't know many people outside of Hogwarts and even fewer that he would trust to care for any child, let alone his own.
Students had boarded the train that morning and he had been in the process of packing when Albus summoned him to his office. He sighed and went over to Olivia who was playing in the floor. "Come on," he grumbled, lifting her up. She had grown significantly over the past few months; her black hair had gotten longer, too.
As they moved through the maze of the dungeons, down hallways, and up stairs, she babbled and squealed. He assumed that she'd start forming words soon. They reached the Hippogriff at the base of the headmaster's office. Severus muttered the password, "Licorice wands," and the statue began to move. Stepping through the door, Albus acknowledged them both with a gentle smile. He settled Olivia on the floor with her toy.
"You wanted to see me."
"Yes, I wanted to just ask, before we all retire for the summer, if you have heard anything from the other Death Eaters in the past few months." Albus was filtering through some letters, in the midst of catching up on his correspondence.
"Most have either been sent to Azkaban or have gone into hiding. Those who haven't are being extremely cautious in their trust and aren't speaking to anyone. Very few have I been able to be in contact with."
"Are you still on good terms with Lucius Malfoy? I know they have a son, Harry's age."
"Yes, He's been able to slide by with his status in society as well as with the Ministry."
"I doubt his views have changed much since becoming a father," Albus said, more statement than question.
"Lucius is very dedicated to his family, but his views remain much unchanged."
The headmaster hummed in agreement. "I remember Lucius and Narcissa being very much in love when they were in school. Quite rare, for an arranged marriage, but quite refreshing." He watched Olivia play, amusement sparkling in his eyes. "Have you made any decisions about what you'll do come September?"
"Not yet. I'm not someone with many relations to rely upon, not many trustworthy ones that is."
"I'm sure you will come up with something," he smiled. "If you need anything at all, you know I am here to help. I'm sure Minerva has said the same." Severus nodded in thanks. "I will let you get back to packing. I'm sure you're ready to get this little one home and settled."
As he continued packing, he thought about his conversation with Dumbledore. Albus rarely asked about his relationship with anyone going beyond his dealings as a spy. What had he meant by it? It seemed out of the ordinary and it caused him to question it extensively.
Lucius was one of the few he could trust among the other Death Eaters. Lucius may not have known the full extent of his relationship with Lily, but he did know that her murder had caused him some rethought on his loyalty to the Dark Lord. Even knowing that, he remained, what could be considered, friends with him. Lucius was the second person, next to Lily, to show him any kindness.
It was true that the Malfoys were very family-oriented. Lucius was very dedicated and protective of his wife and son while Narcissa was both a supportive and loving wife and mother. They were wealthy and had a good standing in society, being an ancient and noble pureblood family. He worked in the Ministry and was on the Board of Directors for Hogwarts while Narcissa stayed home caring for their son, Draco.
Had this been what Albus wanted him to think on? Could they be his best option for someone to watch and care for Olivia while he taught during the school term? He would have to take Olivia to see them soon; they were likely to hear of her one way or another soon and would have questions. Maybe it would be best to visit sooner rather than later.
After settling in at Spinner's End, he wrote to Lucius, who was quick to reply. He hadn't told him in his letter about Olivia, but was set to have tea with both him and Narcissa that afternoon. Olivia had started crawling more and more since being at Spinner's End, with there being more to explore than his quarters at the school. It was becoming more difficult to do what he needed to do while also making sure she didn't get into things.
Severus dissolved the barrier he had put up to keep her from escaping the room and picked her up. Outside his house, he took a breath before tightening his hold on her and disapparating on the spot. Appearing just outside the gates of Malfoy Manor, he donned his usual mask and opened the gates.
When Lucius met him at the door, his eyes widened in surprise. He was momentarily stunned. The noble wizard moved aside to let Severus walk through, eyes focused on the child he carried.
"Cissa, Severus is here," he called over his shoulder, "and he has brought a guest," he added with a questioning glance at his friend. "Severus?"
"I'll explain when Narcissa gets the initial shock out of her system," he said, knowing the witch was likely to have a fit, a delighted fit, but still a fit nevertheless.
Her steps echoed through the halls as she came to see what her husband was talking about. She stopped when she saw the small child in his arms and gasped. "Severus? What...?" she stammered, not knowing the right words to say.
"That was exactly my reaction as well," he lied. It was easier to say than the truth.
"So, you...have a child?" she asked.
"Apparently," he started, "the mother has passed and, though I knew nothing of her, the child was brought to me since I am the listed father." Severus saw Lucius's cautionary stare and continued. "I did test it using a Paternity potion. The timing isn't surprising either."
"Well...it is shocking to say the least." Narcissa drew a deep breath and smiled. "Let us start over. You can just hand that baby girl right over to me," she laughed, taking Olivia from Severus's arms. "Let's not stand in the foyer all afternoon." She led them into the sitting room. "What's her name, Severus?"
"Olivia Persephone."
"Oh, that's lovely. Two women known for their unmistakable beauty," she mused. "Lucius, just look at her! She looks just like you, Severus!"
"I've heard."
"How long has she been with you?" Lucius asked, amused by his wife's attention to the girl.
"Since Christmas."
Lucius lifted a single brow, catching his friend in a lie. "You could've simply told us why you couldn't come to Christmas dinner, you know."
"At the time, I wasn't positive of the truth. It also wasn't something to be explained by letter," he explained. "It has taken some...getting used to."
A very quiet stirring could be heard upstairs and Narcissa turned at the sound. "Oh, that'll be Draco, darling, would you mind?" she asked, forcibly placing Olivia in Lucius's lap. He smiled at her when she reached for his hair. Severus smirked as Lucius adjusted the child onto his knee, amused at the usually highly composed wizard. Narcissa swept from the room and up the stairs, leaving them alone.
"You'll need someone to look after her, of course. While you're at Hogwarts, that is," Lucius stated, having deduced Severus's reasoning for coming to them. It went without saying that he had few to rely upon and the child was not even a year old. She would need trustworthy care.
"I haven't thought of a solution as of yet. Dumblebore allowed her to stay with me during second term due to the suddenness of the situation, but I doubt he will want a toddler in the castle come September."
"She'll stay with us, then, yes?"
"I know you're very busy, Lucius, with the Ministry after recent events and Narcissa, I'm sure, has her hands full with your son," he stated, a roundabout way of apologizing for thrusting another child into their midst.
"Nonsense, Severus. You can't just leave her with anyone. She'll need proper care," he said, emphasizing the word 'proper.' "Besides," Lucius gave him a humorous look, "you'll be doing me a favor. It'll keep my wife from insisting we try for a girl."
Severus laughed. "Are you sure? It may make her insist even more." Lucius gave him a horrified look and he changed the subject and spoke honestly. "I couldn't leave her with just anyone, which is why I came to you. I trust you both implicitly. I can set up an automatic draft with Gringott's-"
"That's not necessary, Severus."
"I insist."
Narcissa's steps echoed back into the room, a recently turned two year old Draco on her hip. "I see you already have an admirer, darling," she laughed at Olivia who had become taken with Lucius's hair again. She settled Draco amidst his toys and books she had summoned.
Lucius bent down, putting the girl to the floor where she proceeded to crawl over to the boy who was eying her curiously. "Severus and I have come to an agreement, Cissa. Olivia will need proper care during the school term as well as good education. She'll stay with us."
"I was hoping that was what you two were discussing," she eyed them both knowingly. "She isn't too much younger than Draco so it's possible they will grow quite fond of each other. It'll be good for Draco, to be around another child. I agree, too; she needs to be well looked after and you know Lucius and I will be sure she's taken care of."
Nights were getting easier, but at the cost of the day. Olivia seemed to be sleeping much easier than before, but Severus was sure that it was because she was beyond exhausted after fighting sleep all day long. It was nearly impossible to get anything done since she demanded to be held almost the entire time.
His summer brewing list wasn't much shorter than it was a month ago. He'd resorted to working on lesson plans and staying up late to brew. Having Olivia around a boiling cauldron emitting toxic fumes wasn't on his to-do list anytime soon. In all honestly, he couldn't wait for the day he would put her in front of a cauldron.
The dinning table was covered in parchment, notes and potions scrawled for every year's coursework. Olivia was making a mess of her blueberries and the juices stained her fingers and mouth. She was making her usual babbling sounds, trying to get his attention. When he reached a stopping point, he looked at her, raising an eyebrow. "Yes, Madam?" he asked, amused at her demanding nature.
"A-ba!" She rambled a series of sounds before holding out a blueberry, which he took and ate quietly. Olivia took a blueberry of her own before squishing it into her mouth and grinning, four tiny teeth stark white against the blueberry stain. Severus couldn't help but let out a soft chuckle. "Da! Dada!" she laughed and squealed.
He paused, leaning back in his chair. Did that count as a word? Dada...