Jimin smiles. "I said a lot of horrible things to you, Jungkook. You know me. You know I didn't mean any of that. Just about everything I said was a gross insecurity that I've never really thought twice about but it all came tumbling out before I could stop it. A lot of it was fear." He sees Jungkook's confused expression and he backtracks.

"I've never been afraid of loving you, or of you loving me," he clarifies. "That's not what scared me. It's the opposite, really. I'm impossibly afraid of not being loved by you. But what set me off in that moment was forgetting Tyler."

"I wouldn't ever allow that to happen. Any of that."

"I know," he says honestly. "But. There is one thing during my freak out that was honest and it's fair that you know which part I'm talking about."

Jungkook nods. "Okay. Which part?"

He takes a deep breath. "The part when I said we wouldn't be together if Tyler wasn't dead." He laces his fingers through Jungkook's. "You know when people go on vacation to a new place, like Hawaii, and when they come back, they talk about it like it's the best place they've ever been to? But no one can relate because no one else has been there, and it doesn't make a difference, because to them, Maui is something they've never experienced, and they don't know what they're missing out on."

His eyes are moving across Jimin's face, confused. "I guess?"

"Jungkook, you're my trip to Maui. I could have been married to Tyler for my entire life and I would have been perfectly happy because I wouldn't have known what it would have been like to experience being loved by you."

Jungkook blinks twice, trying to hold back his smile, or his tears, Jimin isn't sure which. "I'm your trip to Maui."

"You're my trip to Maui." He pauses to squeeze Jungkook's hand in his own, relieved that for the first time in what feels like an eternity, he gets to be the one consoling and taking care of Jungkook. It seems like it's always the other way around. "I hope to God you never know what it feels like to be a widow, but the only way you'll know how I feel is if you go through it yourself. Losing a spouse is... It's always going to be a struggle. It's like I'm constantly trying to put Tyler first but Christ, that doesn't matter anymore, huh?"

"Jimin, it always matters. There are no rules in this. It's whatever feels right to you." He pauses. "I need to apologize for what I said, too, even if this is kind of moot now. I didn't mean what I said about not wishing Tyler was still alive..."

Jimin cuts him off, shaking his head. "I get it now. Insecurities are real and I can't judge you for that. It hurt, yeah, but I understand. I've thought about it a lot. Really."

Jungkook smiles slightly, dimple just barely showing. Jimin needs to get his hands on him. But first: "I'm always going to love Tyler. I will never lie to you about that. But now, I know I'm always going to love you, too. And these past couple of months have hurt almost worse than when Tyler died. Losing him wasn't an option. It was out of my control. With you, I willingly threw you away. Why would someone ever do that to someone like you?" He can feel his eyes starting to water and he does nothing to stop it. "I feel like I'm going through a death again, but with you this time."

Jungkook rubs his thumb along the ridges of Jimin's knuckles. "I'm here. I'm always here. I didn't go anywhere, okay? It's... It's okay to love both of us. I'm not asking you to pick. I would never ask you to do that." He clears his throat, his own eyes watering. "But as long as it's honesty hour, I just need you to know that dating someone who has lost a spouse is really hard, too. I'm not comparing it, because what you've gone through is unbelievable, but I don't always know what I can say or what I can bring up. I remembered it was Tyler's birthday but I didn't mention it because I figured you were keeping silent for a reason."

Jimin nods. "I feel like sometimes I think I have it worse off than everyone else. That's unfair of me.

You lost him, too, and not only do you have to pick up your own pieces, you also have to pick up mine. I tend to forget you're human and have your own stuff going on."

He shrugs. "It happens."

Jimin looks down at his lap. "I think, maybe, I wasn't ready to fall in love with you like I did," he whispers. "But here we are and I can't imagine it otherwise and Christ, I'd have run here from the start if I'd known what it felt like to be yours."

"Min," Jungkook murmurs, squeezing Jimin's hand.

"It's not up to me," Jimin says, starting to feel a little helpless. It now occurs to him that since he sat down, Jungkook hasn't reciprocated his feelings once.

"It's your choice. I'll take you whatever way I can have you. I just hope to God you want all of me the way I want you," he says, huffing out a desperate laugh.

Jungkook i

Jungkook can't look at him in the eye and Jimin hates the feeling in his stomach. He knew it was a possibility that Jungkook didn't want to be with him, but he really thought he could fix this, that they could move on, move forward.

He searches Jungkook's face for an answer. "Is it too late?" he asks, voice breaking on the last word. "I've had time to figure my shit out, and I know what I want now, and maybe it's selfish of me, but Jungkook, I will never run again," he says, nearly pleading.

"I might get scared again but I'll never push you away." When Jungkook doesn't answer, Jimin pulls his hand back and stands up, no idea where he plans to go or what he plans to do. He turns around, looking for his keys frantically, needing to get the fuck out of this house before he breaks even more. That's when Jungkook speaks.

"I know I'm not the only love of your life," Jungkook says slowly, his voice calm and even. Jimin turns to look at him and sees that his eyes are shining. "But you're mine. And I would gladly share that title with someone else if it means I get to be with you."

Jimin can't be held responsible for the noise he makes after that, and he almost sinks to the floor. "Are you sure?"

Jungkook stands up and only needs to take three strides before he's standing right in front of Jimin. "You're... You're the thing I'm most sure of, Min." He traces over Jimin's cheekbone with his thumb. "Do you have any idea how much I missed you? Like, every part of you?"

Jimin has to close his eyes before he can answer and when he opens them again, Jungkook's gaze is locked on his face, blazing. "I've missed watching TV in bed with you."

Jungkook hums. "Me, too. Missed your horrible playlists in the car."

"You mean amazing playlists," he corrects. "Mostly just missed having someone there to let Link outside at five in the morning."

Jungkook snorts. "Gee, thanks."

Jimin smirks and weaves his fingers through Jungkook's hair. "Missed the way your shampoo smells."

He swallows. "You always steal it."

"I like it." He looks up at Jungkook. "I like you, too."

"I'm glad to hear that, because I'm not going anywhere. You won't be able to get rid of me so easily next time."

Jimin rolls his eyes, but when Jungkook drops his forehead, pressing them together, Jimin can't think of a comeback. Instead, he just waits as Jungkook moves exceptionally slowly, breath mingling together before their lips even brush.

It's the gentlest kiss Jimin has ever received. Whenever he's allowed himself to go over this scenario in his head in weeks prior, he imagined it would be hungry and scorching and tantalizing. This is none of those things, and somehow, it's even more personal. Jungkook's lips just barely graze his own, fleeting and teasing, and it isn't until Jungkook cups Jimin's jaw in his hands that Jimin gets impatient.