The team were trying to make sure that there was nothing whatsoever on their desks that would make them have to work over the holiday. They had actually been given Thanksgiving off this year and they were definitely going to have it. Serial killers were just going to have to take a break for a few days, though a whole week would be even better. Not that that was likely to happen but they hoped for it anyway. One day would be good.
Of course, a case came their way the day before. It always happened like that. The universe just loved to laugh at them. Thankfully, it wasn't laughing too hard as it was a local case. So local that they could actually walk to the crime scene. Literally. It happened in the local park. Which, admittedly, was pretty ballsy of the guy (they had profiled that he was a white male in his thirties). Or just plain stupid. They hadn't actually figure out how planned and organised he was yet so it could be either. They needed to figure it out soon. Preferably before the end of the day. And before he killed someone else, of course.
Which is what Morgan was trying to do when he was touching base with Garcia about the security cameras and Internet history of their victims. Reid had come up with something that would change her search parameters and Morgan was trying to get her up to speed.
"That's why Reid thinks that you need to look up cable companies or ISPs..."
Morgan realised that she wasn't even acknowledging that he was talking and waved a hand in front of her wide eyes.
"Hey, are you okay?"
Garcia slowly turned her head so she was now staring at him. She had yet to blink. It was kind of freaking him out a bit. And not in a good way.
Shaking her head, she replied, "I just watched a video of a twerking turkey, so...no I don't think I am."
The look on her face spoke volumes about how horrible said video was.
"A twerking turkey?" Morgan repeated.
"Yes."
"As in... a turkey...that twerks?"
The dance move? A video of turkeys dancing provocatively? The Internet was really a weird place sometimes.
"Yes, my love, twerking normally implies the dance move." Garcia patted him on the arm.
"Right..."
Morgan both did not want to know more and want to know more at the same time.
"Can I see this twerking turkey?" he asked, feeling curious despite himself.
"Hot Stuff, I love you but not enough to go and watch that video again."
"You don't need to watch it to send me the link."
"No, but I need to go onto YouTube and copy the link and see the frozen image of aforementioned twerking turkey. And that is something I really don't need to see again, moving or not."
"Well then, can I watch it on your computer?"
"I am not putting my poor babies through that again."
She looked quite adamant about this. It must be a bad video. Normally, she wasn't able to deny him anything. Now he really had to see it.
"Come on, Baby Girl," he purred. "I'll even push the button for you. You don't even have to look."
"No one touches my babies, you know that, Derek Morgan," he immediately got scolded. "Not even to move the mouse and definitely not to watch twerking turkeys."
Of course, JJ would choose this moment to magically appear like some sort of FBI fairy. Hug, Morgan could really see the blonde woman in wings. Maybe next year for Hallowe'en? What were his chances of getting his ass kicked for it?
"There's videos of twerking turkeys?" JJ asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Very unfortunately, yes."
Garcia gave another shudder for good measure.
"How does that even work?"
"It's actually quite easy with some good video editing software," Garcia explained. "You just need to-" then she realised what she was going to say and shook her head violently. "Nope. I don't want to think how people edit turkey's butts. People's butts, however..."
She gave Morgan an appraising look from his head to his toes.
"Baby girl, there better not be any videos of me twerking out there on the Internet," Morgan warned.
"Mon ami, we've been over this. I would not be so generous to share those videos. You are all for me."
That got her an automatic smirk from him.
"Can we get back to the twerking turkeys?" JJ interrupted.
"I would really rather not."
"What would Garcia not do?" Emily asked, just coming back from an interview with a possible witness.
"Any further details?" JJ asked.
Emily shook her head. "Nothing. Didn't recognise the van or see anything more than that Groundskeeper did."
That was frustrating but maybe something would come back from forensics.
"So," Emily continued. "What does Garcia not want to do?"
"Watch videos of twerking turkeys."
It took Emily a moment to process that but when she did her mouth gaped open.
"What?"
"Not videos. One video," Garcia corrected. "One is more than enough."
"Of a twerking turkey?"
That was a rather impressive look of awe and disbelief from Prentiss. Usually that look was the result of something Reid said.
"Yes," Garcia said firmly, sounding very much done with this whole discussion as well as a little bit traumatised.
"This, I have to see."
"Not on my babies."
Reid always felt that he came into conversations at the worst possible moment. Normally right in the middle so he rarely understood the context and inevitably it was something inappropriate. Not surprising when you took into account the pair who were the most vocal in this discussion. He swore that Garcia and Morgan were responsible for more sexual harassment seminars and lectures than Rossi was.
"Don't worry, I have my phone," Emily said, waving said device in the air before typing something about "twerking turkeys" into it.
Not that he knew what that was.
"What's twerking?" Reid asked in confusion.
"I'm sure Emily would be happy to show you," Rossi said, struggling to keep a straight face.
"No twerking in the office," Hotch instructed as Emily threw her pen at Rossi.
It hit him on the cheek, leaving a streak of ink behind. Emily preferred the inky ones.
"What the hell?"
"I don't twerk," Emily informed him as he wiped the ink off his face on disgust.
"Not even for educational purposes?"
"I have another pen here," she threatened.
Reid sighed in discontent; no help was coming from that quarter. Not that he ever thought there would be. Rossi and Emily gave dubious explanations to things at best.
"JJ?" he asked helplessly, turning to the person who was usually happy to explain things nicely to him.
She shook her head, mirth twinkling in her eyes. "Not this time, Spence."
Emily snorted at that. "Not even for Will?"
"If you think I can move like that you have another thing coming."
And they had officially lost him. Not that he minded, from the sound of things this was probably something he or his eidetic memory did not need to know.
"What about you, Morgan? Think you can twerk?"
"Not even for the ladies."
Yep, definitely did not need to know.