PART XVI. Butterfly.

"You're the knot that comes undone.
You're the daylight dressed as darkest night. The flight of a stringless kite."

- Chris Mosdell.

Kurama.

"Are you sure, Aiko?" Mother's voice was soft, but I could hear the two in the kitchen. "Shuichi says you're staying at a friend's house, but if we're closer to Meiou, I wouldn't mind letting you stay with us."

I was in the living room with Shuuichi, absentmindedly watching him writing equations on a plain piece of scratch paper. The setting sun cast a warm, orange glow on the soft brown wood table.

"It's fine," Aiko hurriedly replied, hushed. "The Kuwabara's house is actually closer to the grocery store, so—"

"Are you not on the registers anymore?"

Aiko rerouted quickly. "I'm in the back doing stocking now. It's actually why I've put on a bit of muscle."

It would be harder to come and go from my house to Genkai's with mother and Hatanaka able to watch over her. It would help to keep her from her duties if Mother was able to keep a watchful eye on her—she couldn't be at Genkai's as often. But…

"I work late nights now," she continued. "The hours are longer so I can have better pay."

"Well, I worry about you," Mother said, sadness twinging her throat. "You've been kicked out of your home, you're still managing your school work, you're working late nights—"

"It's alright!" Aiko's voice pitched cheerfully, forcefully, as she leaned over to rest her hands on Mother's shoulders. I stood from my seat and casually made my way into the kitchen. "I'm doing fine. I'm okay."

"Need help with the dishes?" I asked, and Mother straightened herself quickly, fixing her expression.

"Ah, Shuichi." Mother fidgeted, straightening her apron. "Is Shu-kun done with his homework?"

"He's almost done."

"It's actually time I start heading back to the Kuwabara's," she said, and Mother bit her tongue.

Aiko hurried to gather her things from the dinner table, tucking her hair behind her ear as she leaned over the white table cloth, reaching for her schoolbag. I knew Mother so badly wanted to push harder, but she could read the younger girl well.

Aiko hurried to my side. "Do you want to walk halfway?"

"Of course." I smiled to Mother and turned to follow the girl who was making a beeline for the front door. I hurried after her, bidding Mother a short goodbye.

She was quick to avoid confrontation with Mother. I set my pace to match hers, and she let out a sigh when we were far enough from the front door.

"Hey," she said quietly, head lifting up to watch the sunset painted clouds. "What do you think about what Nagisa said?"

"About soul eaters being human?"

"Yeah." Her voice was quiet, thoughtful, matching the sad twinge in her eyes.

"Well, if he is telling the truth, then…" I thought about it. How else would humans be mistaken for holy beings? Humans had their own ki. Distinctive, the same way you could tell a youkai from a human. And then I remembered, the Toguro brothers. They had their wish granted by the gods. It was why they were so confusing; their youki, their reiki, it wasn't natural. "Do you think the gods may have something to do with them?"

"Why the gods?" she asked, glancing to me.

It didn't take long to explain to her the Toguro brothers, but we had almost made it to the Kuwabara household. We decided to head into the nearby park and discuss the rest of the theory there.

"So the gods can change human into youkai?" she mumbled. "Any god can?"

"Gods who have more power, yes," I replied, sitting on the bench as she took her seat next to me. "The more believers they have, the more powerful they tend to be. Once a god has no more believers, they die. Thus, the longer their influence lives in society, the longer their life, and the longer they can grow. Not every god has the power to change a being's life."

"There should be a registry list of what gods grant the wishes at that tournament, right?" she asked.

I thought about it. "It would make sense… wouldn't it?"

She reached for her purse, digging through it hurriedly to find her compact. She gripped the compact, staring down at the soft purple color. "Those brothers… why did they do that?"

"For strength, I suppose," I replied. "To live longer, become stronger."

She frowned in thought and used her thumbnail to flick the compact open.

Koenma.

We sat in a dimly lit room, a secret closet that I would use when I wanted to hide from the ever growing mountain of paperwork. Only Jorge knew of the room, and now, Benzaiten too. She seemed calm despite us sitting so close together on a small, cushy loveseat. In front of us, on the wood washed stand, sat a relatively large television set. Its bright blue light was fluorescent, casting an odd hue under the dim yellow light.

Benzaiten had just sat next to me a moment ago, and I was fiddling with the television settings to accept the video tape. As I found the correct setting, a small jingle played from my robe. I paused, wondering if I should answer it.

I stood and offered an apology to Benzaiten, who waived it off with grace and a cheerful smile, before hurrying to the corner to dig out my golden compact.

Aiko's voice rang out immediately, without hesitation. "Do you have the registration for the gods who grant wishes at the dark tournament?"

The question caught me off guard. "Huh?"

"The dark tournament where the winner has a wish granted by the gods," she said, brows furrowed in thought. "Is there a list of what gods grant the wishes?"

"I believe so," I replied. "Why?"

"Didn't those Toguro brothers have a wish granted to become youkai?" she asked. "I have an idea about them and soul eaters… Nagisa said when he was arrested on that tournament's island, it was because he had an item from a soul eater, and it changed him."

I had a feeling I knew where she was going with the lead. "I'll dig around for it; I'm sure one exists. I'll send you the report when I find one."

"Okay," she replied, her eyes flickering behind me to see Benzaiten. Her brows raised in thought, and a smug smile curved upon her glossed lips. "I'll leave you alone then."

I bit my tongue from yelling at her, but before I could open my mouth, she flickered off screen. With a sigh, I shut the golden compact quickly before looking over my shoulder. Benzaiten's curious eyes shone in the artificial lighting, and she seemed to smile peacefully. Serotonin flushed through my body, and I wondered what caused that smile.

"That girl," she said, to my surprise.

"Aiko?"

She nodded, petal string earrings jingling. "I received a prayer for her."

Kurama? I wanted to ask. Though I wanted to trust Benzaiten, the less information she knew, the better... for both our sakes. I refrained from naming him. "Well, I'm only a little surprised he would turn to prayers, but I suppose he is scared."

"Not scared at all," she replied, eyes closing softly as her hand lifted to rest over her heart to retell her message. "There was an odd sense of reassurance, of vengeance."

Someone other than Kurama had prayed for her? Surprising. I supposed it may have been one of the girls but… Yukina? No, I had a feeling she had forgone the route of prayers, for many had gone unanswered for so long.

Then…

"She is who you're placing hope in for Ningenkai, isn't it?" she continued. "They were so reassured there would be change, a revolution."

The little captive boy we interrogated? Surprising, considering Aiko and I could practically feel the anger pouring out of him when we had last spoken to him.

"What she told you of, I can find your footage." Benzaiten tucked a long strand of black hair behind her ear. "Shall we begin?"

"But, it occurred in Makai," I replied. "I thought it only recorded happenings in Ningenkai since the border was put up?"

"Well, yes," she agreed. "But I may be able to find something else you are looking for."

It was worth a try. I reached for the tape on the stand, and she extended her hand. I looked at the smooth, porcelain skin in confusion.

"No," I assured her. "I can put it in the videocassette recorder—"

"Ah, well… I can search through it without the help of that…"

I stared at her, unsure of if she had purposefully let me sit here and tinker with the contraption, or if she was being polite the entire time. Gingerly, I handed her the tape. She set it on her lap and taped on it lightly with her almond shaped nails.

It felt like an uncomfortably pregnant pause, and I debated on asking if she was sure she knew what she was doing. Luckily, I had held my tongue long enough from letting myself sound like a pompous asshole.

The black tape began shining a soft gold light before vibrating gently. Her hands hovered over it carefully, motherly, as it began to change consistency, jiggling like a sugary treat. It began hovering, lifting from her lap as the jiggling became more violent until it began breaking apart until it disintegrated into light. The gold light swirled around us before collecting itself into a translucent sphere above our heads.

I hurriedly turned off the television, so the lights wouldn't mix; to give a clear vision. After my finger pressed the hard plastic button, my body fell back into the seat heavily. My eyes were glued to the brilliantly bright gold sphere of light hovering in front of us.

"The Divine Eye," Benzaiten said softly, almost a whisper, as she gazed up to it. "This is its first and true form."

My jaw was agape, and I couldn't find the strength to pull it closed. My mafuken had fell into my lap; and though my hands instinctively cupped it in protection, my eyes never left the light.

"It had recorded everything of every realm until the border went up…" she continued. "Then, it only managed to record only mass catastrophes in Makai."

"Can you show the day Aiko spoke of?" I managed the words, and Benzaiten nodded before closing her eyes.

She lifted her face to the light, letting it bask in its glow, and the spheres core increased in opacity, solidifying in color as a picture began painting itself. Vibrant colors, the colors of the world, painted themselves on the gold canvas, as if it was a blank, white slate.

Then, I saw him. He appeared into vision, clear as day. He was younger, boyish in charm and clothing, even. He reached his hand out, taking a thin piece of paper from a woman, blonde with striking blue eyes. She covered herself in a soft brown cloak, hooded and tight. She smiled to him, warmly, as she handed him the ticket to the Dark Tournament.

"This is in Ningenkai," Benzaiten replied, eyes still closed. "He was on the island before he received his ticket."

That woman, I thought to remember her face. I would have to find her name, along with the rest of the gods on the list.

Fukui.

I turned off my CD player and turned out the light. The soft yellow glow that illuminated my eggshell white walls flickered off, shrouding my room in the pale moonlight. Sluggishly, I made my way to the window to grasp the curtains. I stared out of the window, watching the cars pass by below; the cotton fabric between my fingers felt foreign.

My fingers didn't feel like my own. My wrists felt numb. I wondered if anyone could even see me from up here; I wondered if anyone ever looked up here, wondering the same from their perspective.

I wanted to crawl into bed, not because I was tired, but because there was nothing else for me to do. I didn't want to sit out in the living room with them. The television could only hold my attention for so long. I didn't see a point in studying. I didn't think I could manage to find interest in any leisure reading.

And yet, I still stood at my window, watching myself standing from above.

The door creaked open, and though I became more aware of myself, I hadn't returned.

"What, are you a dyke now?" Akane's voice slid through the darkness. "Why the fuck…? Why is your light off? It's not even nine yet."

"And why would I be a lesbian?" I sighed, but couldn't feel my mouth moving.

For some reason, everyone in the entire world was a lesbian to Akane, except for the girl who actually was. I wasn't sure if she was honestly oblivious, or just in denial. It wasn't like Ami made any moves on her; she was perfectly content doing whatever it was that made Akane happy, because seeing Akane happy, made Ami happy. Ami followed Akane blindly, and would to her death.

I supposed Ami and I were similar in the respect that we weren't going to find love with who we wanted. Ami, with the evil monster that was Akane, who I doubted had any capacity for love in her heart; and me, with the reality that I was never good enough or worthy to be loved by anyone.

Well, at least she had someone to love, I suppose.

"You invited that dyke."

With what felt like heavy movements, I slowly turned to look at her. She'd tied her hair in a bun and was tying the strings of her red silk robe tight around her wait. The hall light illuminated her frame, and I could see the faint pink color of a face mask tightening on her cheeks.

"Why do you care?" There was no point in arguing with her. "You could just say lesbian, you know."

"Are you like, giving up on men because you can't find love?"

No, you stupid fucking broad, I was giving up on life. Go away.

"I did it for Ami," I sighed. I tried regaining feeling in my throat, but it was moving on its own.

"She's dated guys before."

"Yeah, but did she ever end up liking them?" I watched her eyes flicker to the side in thought.

"…I really don't know where you're getting the idea she's gay." Akane crossed her arms as she leaned on my door frame.

"Because she's in love with you." It wasn't my confession to tell, but it wasn't a secret.

I expected it to rile Akane up more, and she would throw a few more slurs and insults at me before getting bored and leaving to peel off her unnecessarily expensive face mask and dig through the pantry for some snacks.

Instead, she was now standing upright. I wondered if I really should have said that.

"She said that?" she asked.

"Why do you care?" I asked. "You're straight, and you clearly don't like girls like her. I wonder how she feels when she hears you say that word."

"I…" Her posture slouched slightly.

For the first time, I had made her speechless. I only wished it wasn't at Ami's expense… regarding this.

She staggered backwards thoughtfully, and grabbed my door handle.

"I figured if Yori liked girls, then maybe Ami would have a chance with someone who could actually be interested in her." I shrugged and found my legs.

I made my way over to my bed to pull back the white duvet and sheets. My hands were numb and the covers felt so heavy; I wanted to collapse into the whiteness and curl into myself, but my body wouldn't move anymore.

"Yeah. Go to sleep at eight-fucking-thirty, freak," she mumbled, closing the door behind her.

I stood over my bed, vision going out of focus, still watching myself from above.

Aiko.

The room was dark and cold. I could feel the chill in the air, the wetness from the late night's rain still lingering. My heart hurt; anger swirled around in the bottomless pit of it, fiery rage spitting and leaping around.

The wood floor I sat on was hot around me; I felt my ki spiking, flickering the way I felt the anger flickering out of my heart. Opening my eyes, they adjusted to the darkness. Soon, the room began glowing a soft purple tint. Flames flickered next to me, traveling outside of me like a lit match riding on gasoline.

Purple flames poured across the wood floor, traveling to every corner, growing higher until they reached eye level. No matter how much time passed, the anger didn't fade. In fact, the more the thoughts ran through my head, the angrier I became.

Hayashi wanted to play dirty. I could play violently.

Maya.

I hadn't seen Aiko all morning. It didn't worry me too much. I hadn't seen Genkai either, so I figured she was undergoing some special training alone.

I wandered into the kitchen to have breakfast… er, brunch, based off the time. Miyuki and Yukina had made some grilled fish, rice, and miso earlier, but they were nowhere to be found now, either. Settling with my plate at the dining table in the common room, I flipped through the neat stack of magazines and newspapers in the middle of the square table. I decided to go with today's newspaper.

It seemed someone had went down to the nearby town this morning.

As I began eating, I skimmed through the headlines. I figured nothing was interesting and would just pick up a magazine instead, but then my eyes caught a small headline in the corner of the first page.

Seeing the phrase "all-female train cars" made my heart jump into my throat. I skimmed through the passage, fearing the worst, and then found the sentences I was dreading.

"There you are." Genkai's voice came from behind me. "You're sleeping in a lot more often. Aiko's not waking you up?"

"Where is she?" I turned around to see my mentor, and her gaze didn't change, even when she noticed the color draining from my face.

They had finally put the money out for all-female train cars in our city, and hailed the years old case of "Girl A" as the spark of the supposed "recent movement" that demanded safer public transport for women and girls. I was stuck in this mountain far away from civilization for months now, so I had heard of no such movement.

When her case was initially brought to light and her family began pioneering the demand for safer public transport for women and girls in our area, there was quite a lot of public backlash. Society figured the women and girls held some responsibility as well, for doing something to warrant the sexual harassment or assault. It was a lengthy public battle to even be considered for legislature, and was eventually dropped by her family.

Though I had a feeling why it was dropped, I never asked. I never talked to her about this, because it was something she didn't want anyone to know about. She didn't want to be Girl A. It was better if I pretended I didn't know she was Girl A. The problem was nobody knew she was Girl A, so she heard plenty of things nobody would ever say to the face of a survivor.

"She's doing one last session in the dojo," Genkai replied. "You should be worrying about your last session as well."

"Has she seen this?" I asked, holding up the newspaper.

"You need to be worrying about yourself," Genkai replied, but when she watched me set the newspaper back on the table in thought, she continued. "Based on her attitude this morning, I think she saw something she didn't want to."

I wouldn't have time to talk to her about it before our deadline. Wondering what to do, I stared down at my hands and tried racking my mind. My ki moved on its own, sparking in my hand and swirling into a small ball. If I talked to her about it before the deadline, it could mess something up—but would we even get to talk after everything?

Before the ki formed into a small, bright blue ball, I let it disperse. Sparks popped and flickered into the air, disappearing.

"Let's go," Genkai said. "You'll be helping Suzume make some talismans."

I looked up to my mentor, surprised, before leaving my hardly touched plate and following her across the grounds to the shrine. I had done a lot of training to focus and control the movement of my own ki, but I had never made a talisman before.

Thoughts of Aiko drifted from the forefront my mind and buried themselves in the small crevices in the back. I performed the cleansing ritual after Genkai and followed her into the shrine. The air felt cold and stiff, and my feet stuck to the wood below as I slowly trailed behind the short, old woman.

We passed through the entrance hall first, and then finally arrived in the main hall. Suzume was not there, but instead a guest sat in front of the offering box. A ghost guest. She was elegant, floating above the ground softly, glowing and translucent. She was adorned in beautiful traditional clothing and makeup—a geisha.

"This is the first time you've seen Suzume outside of her borrowed body, isn't it?" Genkai asked.

I did a double-take between my mentor and the geisha. "Suzume?!"

I had only ever seen Suzume in…her borrowed body?

"Sit," Suzume instructed calmly, with a different voice. This one was much softer and poised, elegant. "You'll be helping me make talismans."

Slowly, in shock, I sat across from her on a soft pillow. Tucking my legs beneath me, I took in her attire. Her kimono was elegant, along with the head dressing and flowers adorning her perfectly styled hair. Her obi was in the front—wait. Front?

I stared at the obi bow, tied ornately in the front of her kimino, unlike the back. I couldn't remember what it meant, the word I was looking for, but she wasn't a geisha.

"So, you've noticed," she said, and my eyes shot up to hers. "Take a talisman, and let us begin."

I reached for one of the soft papers on a small table that sat between us. Gingerly, I picked up the parchment, and Suzume instructed me quickly.

"You'll transfer your own energy into the ink, and we'll create our own weapons."

Aiko.

An odd, never ending spiral staircase that wound throughout the mansion carried me to the roof. Of course, even with the map, it wasn't easy to get here. It felt as if I would be walking upside down, defying gravity, or even parallel to the ground below, curving and turning. There were multiple doors to pass through, and sometimes the staircase would split into two paths to choose from. If I wasn't careful, I'd end up through a few doors and end up on a flight of stairs I had been walking on just minutes ago.

It was like a never-ending Mobius until you managed to find the breaking points. Some lucky breaks included walking through a door and into a small room—more aptly likened to a closet—with no windows or furniture. Only lonely walls.

Despite the circle the stairs took me in, the roof, and building itself, was flat, wide, and rectangular. Rigid, made of heavy, thick cement. Leaves and nature's debris coated the rooftop, giving it an oddly homely, lived-in feel.

For someone who wanted to get out, but couldn't find their way back down, this seven story drop was their answer.

Dust picked up around my shoes as I looked out to the city below the hill. Lights shone like glitter, sparkling around the ground; the stars were nowhere to be seen. I heaved a heavy breath and let my shoulders relax.

Tonight would be a wild goose chase for everyone.