- It is out of the question!

Rey knew it. Coming back and explaining everything that had happened on Exegol was going to be complicated even for her. The Emperor is dead. The First Order is no more and the whole galaxy seems to be at peace at last, but not her.

Her gaze follows Finn actively pacing in front of her as he rushes into her corner while Poe passes a hand over his face visibly searching for his words. She didn't expect them to understand, but a little support from them probably wouldn't hurt. After all she had just gone through and lived through, she wished someone had just said "Thank you".

- Rey, he's got your brain flipped, hasn't he? That's got to be it...I'm going to kill him!

- No! Finn you're not there, it's more...

- Complicated? You know, I'm starting to find it upsetting to be constantly pushed aside as if I'm incapable of understanding. I am, you know? I'm able to understand you better than you think.

And yet, that's not the impression he's getting right now, but she can't blame them.

- That was never my intention and you know that. All I'm asking for is a few days and...we'll go.

- And where exactly?

- I don't know yet, I...I need to think about it.

- There aren't many places ready for the greatest torturer in the galaxy.

- Kylo Ren is no more. I told you that. Ben is back.

- Of course he has.

This conversation is going around in circles, and despite everything she may say, Rey knows that no one will want to listen to her version of the facts because the vast majority of minds are occupied by a single thought: the presence in the room next door of the most hated man in the known worlds.

- Why do you refuse to believe this? Without his help, I...

His sentence stops as if his words were still hanging, hanging from the edge of his lips. At that moment, all the images of that past moment jostle in his head. The Emperor. His death. Ben. His disappearance and his return. She barely believed it herself. Ben had returned. After everything that had happened. How was that possible? Why now? What had tipped him over? She had so many questions on her mind and so little time to look for the answers. Right now, Rey had to justify Ben's return and stop most members of the Resistance from jumping down his throat. This is not obvious when the only two people with authority on the base are themselves tempted to take the plunge. In a way, Finn's anger blurs Poe's strange silence as he sits there, completely stunned, without finding anything more to say. She was not asking for forgiveness, only time. Time to heal. Time to recover and time to know what to do now. That's all she needed.

- All right, listen up, both of you, Poe finally stands up. Obviously, we owe him, don't we? And I find it hard to believe I'm going to say this, but...

- Poe!

- Wait Finn, let me finish. Nevertheless, I can't allow him to remain unsupervised, and I don't want to be held responsible for the atmosphere on the base. We should be out there with everyone rejoicing and instead...Honestly it's a tricky position, but if Rey needs time, then it's okay.

- I don't believe it. You're the one saying that?

A weary sigh escapes the young General. For the moment, nothing in his new position pleases him, but Leia has entrusted him with the reins, believing him capable, and although his head is in a cockpit and he would probably be the first volunteer on the long list of people wanting to take Ren's life, Poe is trying to take his role very seriously by trying to see further. Rey is infuriating, but he knows how, and it's thanks to her that they were able to get to Exegol and put an end to the Last Order fleet before it became a threat to the free worlds. So if his only request was just that... so be it.

As for Finn, he was far from happy about this decision, and he wouldn't let his friend be fooled by some trick of the mind. It wasn't like him. He'd known Rey for almost a year now and she wasn't like that. So what really happened on Exegol? For a brief moment, he felt him die. For a brief moment, Rey was gone and suddenly...she was back? Something must have happened and Finn knew that there was no point in wasting time in this conversation and that if he wanted answers, he had to go back to the source.

Grabbing his jacket, he suddenly went out into the hallway, ready to enter the adjoining room when Poe stopped him, holding him by the arm.

- I know what you're thinking and believe me, this is not a good idea.

- It's not? You think? he whistles

- Finn... Let it go, the General insists, looking him straight in the eye.

So even Poe finds it normal to house and care for the man responsible for their situation? The man who destroyed families and entire lives? The man who did everything he could to abuse his friend? He doesn't like all this, but when his eyes meet Rey's, which almost looks like a silent plea, then he vividly exits his companion's grip before going further.

- I'm going to go talk to him," Poe whispers, but you know...Finn's probably not the only one with a problem with this situation.

- I know. I know he's not.

So when Poe, too, disappears around the corner, the silence seems to weigh down Rey with a weight she thought she'd gotten rid of. No one could understand, of course...and she didn't expect them to, she just wished they would have trusted her. After all they had been through and gone through together, she didn't think that one day she would have to justify her choices to them. Nevertheless, after taking a few minutes for herself, she finally unlocks the door and enters the room where a nurse droid appears to be busy as she delicately approaches the bed on which the one and only reason for all this is lying. What would have happened to her if Ben hadn't come to join her? Would she have succumbed to the temptation of Palpatine? Just the thought of that name still frightens her.

- I'm sorry, I'm sorry...

The faint voice in the air pulls her out of her dark thoughts as a hand grasps hers.

- It's not your fault, she reassures him by caressing the back of her hand with her thumb mechanically...

- We both know we do.

- No, we don't. Well, without you I...

She shakes her head as if to chase away the phrase that was coming to her then. Normally, Rey should be happy, she should feel relieved, but something is missing. She knows that her happiness doesn't stay with the Resistance and that in order to be fulfilled, she would have to leave.

- You saved my life, okay? They weren't there, you were. You came. You turned away from the Dark Side and came back to the Light.

- But I just...

I didn't know if it was because of their connection, but suddenly a deep sadness came over her and she knew it wasn't from her. Sadness. Guilt. Remorse. These are not her feelings...

- You are no longer Kylo Ren. You're not that man anymore. You are Ben Solo.

Just the mention of that name was enough to make him crack.

Then the whole room suddenly found itself in the greatest of silences at times interspersed with silent sobs. Ben was crying.

- I've done so many things Rey... I am a monster!

- No you're not and I'm going to prove it to you.

She took a moment, hesitantly, and then naturally came to sit beside him, going so far as to take him in her arms while she could feel his whole being trembling. Ben's fragility, she had sensed a long time ago now and perhaps it was her task to make him whole again like he was, forced her for a while to face who she really was. Clinging to the past, Rey was just a girl filled with deep loneliness until she met him and he pushed her to face everything she was repressing inside.

So yes, without Ben, Rey would probably have been lost in his quest for identity. Without Ben, Rey would probably have surrendered himself body and soul to the Emperor. Without Ben, Rey would have been unable to face and accept who she really is.

Now it's his turn to show her that "Ben Solo" still has so much to offer the galaxy.