Author's note: Okay, here is where we start climbing the angst hill, kinda like a rollercoaster. Just remember, this is a Damerey endgame. Don't kill me. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Not mine.

Chapter 13

Rey kept her eye on the puck; her face scrunched in concentration. It was a testament to how much Poe had improved over the summer that she had to focus during these little impromptu matches. Not long after their trip to New York, Poe expressed an interest in having a rematch. Rey laughed in his face; there was no way he was serious!

A year and a half into this partnership and he was still surprising her.

It started as a lark, just something to pass the time on their breaks. Just like that first fateful match, Poe was abysmal. Thankfully, he didn't let his frustration put her back in the emergency room. After a little while, he actually asked for her advice. She didn't understand why he was so keen, but she didn't see the harm. At least it was entertaining.

They practiced enough that even Poe started to improve. He had yet to beat her, but he did score occasionally. Poe advanced toward her, keeping the puck in front of him. He looked up, trying to gauge how far he was from the goal they'd set up. Rey used his distraction to charge forward and steal the puck away from him, zooming around him.

"Ugh!" he cried. "How am I still so bad at this?" He stamped his foot in frustration, which caused some ice shavings to shoot up in a puff.

"You're not bad," Rey argued. "You're just…not good."

Poe glared at her. "Yeah, that makes me feel so much better."

"I've been playing since I was a kid," Rey reminded him. "I have an unfair advantage."

"You said it, not me."

She laughed. "Come on, I'll let you go again."

"So magnanimous of you."

They only had fifteen minutes left on their break; Leia would expect them to be ready when she came back. Rey set up to defend her goal; Poe shook his stick, mumbling to it. Rey thought it was cute. And if she took the opportunity to ogle his ass, that was her business.

It was so hard to remind herself that they were strictly partners and friends. They spent fifteen or sixteen hours a day at the rink, running through their programs over and over. It was painfully boring most days. To break up the monotony, they played games or talked about whatever movie they'd watched last. Rey's reading list had expanded; sometimes they debated whatever they were reading. Suddenly, hanging out with Poe was the opposite of boring; he wasn't the stick in the mud she first met.

They spent time together outside the rink. They had their Friday night movie nights, of course. Summertime meant sunshine and pool time. The first time Poe joined her at the pool, she gaped at him like he had two heads. Those evenings she was certain she offended some deity—or maybe all of them. Poe wet and dressed in nothing but swim trunks was something that started to haunt her dreams. She was convinced it was written all over her face, though Poe continued to act like nothing was different.

Perhaps for him, nothing was different.

That depressed her.

She never did this. She never got emotionally involved. She was a one-night stand kind of girl. Back in Minnesota, she was too busy playing hockey or working to have time for a serious relationship. She just didn't see the point. Everyone left eventually anyway. The Ticos had been the only constant presence in her life since she was nine. Until Poe.

Poe, of course, was off-limits. He had a beautiful, accomplished—if annoying—girlfriend. Lately, it seemed like Zorii wouldn't let them forget her existence. She was still in London, claiming that the company needed her services too much for her to visit. She hadn't even visited for Poe's birthday, which was unforgivable to Rey. She'd sent a fancy gift instead and dragged Poe away from movie night to gush about it over the phone. Rey couldn't be sure, but it seemed like Zorii started calling more often and at times she knew Poe would be with Rey. Granted, they were together often these days, but that wasn't the point.

Either Zorii was that insecure or she'd turned super needy overnight.

She didn't have anything to worry about. Rey had no intention of ruining Poe's relationship. She'd suffer in silence.

Poe backed up from the puck to get a running start. Rey gave herself a little shake; she needed to get her head back in the game. Instead of coming right at her as he usually did, he attacked in a wide arc. Caught off guard, it took Rey a second to counter him, but he was past her faster than she could blink.

"Yes!" he cried, pumping his fist in the air as he scored.

Rey smirked. "That's what? Five total now?"

Poe shook his head. "Ah, ah, you're not stealing this from me. I earned that."

Only because I was distracted, she thought. She had to change her skates; she retrieved Poe's stick and returned to where she'd left her bag. A phone started ringing; Rey groaned inwardly. She knew who that ringtone belonged to. Zorii. She ignored Poe as much as she could while she changed her skates.

"Hey," he said, putting the call on speaker as he grabbed his water bottle.

"Hey babe," Zorii replied. "How's training?"

"Great, we're just finishing a break."

"Looks like I caught you at a good time then."

"Looks like." Poe shared an apologetic look with Rey; she kept her face neutral.

"You sound out of breath; I thought you were on a break?" Zorii asked.

Did she have the most grating voice in existence or what? Rey went back to lacing up her skates, pointedly ignoring the couple. "We were playing a little hockey," Poe replied. "For fun."

"You hate hockey!"

Rey winced inwardly. The woman knew Rey was within earshot. "I don't hate it," Poe retorted. "In fact, I just scored on Rey." He sounded very proud of himself; Rey couldn't resist smiling.

"You what?"

"A goal. I scored a goal." Poe flushed beat red; he mouthed the word "sorry" to Rey. She shrugged. She wanted to take Poe's phone and shove it somewhere it wouldn't be found, but that would be suspicious. Instead, she got out her phone and pretended to be playing a mindless game. "Listen, Zorii, we're about to get started, did you need something?"

"I was hoping to get your opinion."

"On what?" He sounded exasperated to Rey.

"What to get your dad for his birthday."

"You don't need my help for that. Just do what I do and get him a tie. He'll love it."

"Kes is a man of simple tastes."

"See? Problem solved."

"Okay. I'll let you get back to practice. Love you."

"You too," he replied, ending the call.

Rey sucked in a harsh breath; she felt like she'd been punched in the chest. Hastily, she shoved her phone in her bag and skated off, pretending to warm up for the second half of their practice. That right there, she scolded herself. That right there was the reason she needed to get over this stupid crush. Poe already had someone he loved. Even if it were a choice—which it wasn't—he'd never choose her. The very idea was laughable. Unbidden, a tear spilled onto her cheek; she wiped at it furiously. She took several steadying breaths; she couldn't let him know anything was wrong. She was fine. She could do this.

In a few months, this would all be over, one way or another.

Poe carried the bucket of popcorn to the theater; Rey would be here any minute. They were watching one of his favorites tonight, an adaptation of A Tale of Two Cities. It was one of the longer ones; they might have to watch it over two nights. That was fine with Poe. He appreciated the break from worrying about their first competition in a month's time.

How had October gotten here so quickly? Where had the summer gone? It hadn't been that long ago that he and Rey spent lazy evenings at the pool, just enjoying each other's company. Somewhere in the middle of all this, she'd become his best friend. He told her things he'd never told anyone, not even Zorii. He wanted to feel bad about that, but he didn't. Zorii could transfer back to the States anytime she wanted. Poe knew she loved London though; she still wanted him to move there after the Games. Her birthday gift was a case in point; she'd gotten him a new suit and arranged a private gallery viewing at the Louvre.

Poe hadn't thought about visiting the Louvre in years.

He glanced at his phone; Rey was late. That was odd. He texted her. You coming?

He got one of those "do not disturb" automatic replies in response. What the hell? Worried now, he called her, but it went straight to voicemail. Poe called Leia as he hurried to the front of the house. She didn't answer either. He shoved his shoes on and yanked open the door, intent on going to the loft. He came up short when he found Leia on the other side of the door. "I was calling you!" he cried.

"I know, but I was on my way here. I wanted to tell you in person."

"Tell me what?"

"Rey's left for the weekend."

"What? What do you mean left?" She hadn't said a word to him! Why would she leave without saying anything?

Leia saw the hurt all over Poe's face; her heart went out to him. She had a feeling about what was going on with her charges, even if they didn't. Or more precisely, Poe didn't. She couldn't make him see sense; he had to figure out what he wanted on his own. She refused to interfere.

"Is she coming back?"

"Of course. She just needed to get out of the bubble, as it were."

"The bubble? Like we've got her chained up here like some animal?" Poe scrubbed his hand over his face. Had he done something to offend her? She always called him out when he did something shitty; it was one of the things he liked best about her. But they got along so well now; this completely blindsided him.

"Poe, try to understand. She's not like you."

"What is that supposed to mean?" he snapped. Now he was angry. They had training! She couldn't just take off any time she wanted! "It doesn't matter! She's got three months to qualify for Nationals! Our first competition is a month away! She needs every minute!"

"I know that," Leia said patiently. "She'll be back first thing Monday."

"Really?"

"Poe, come on. She's never asked for anything…"

Poe knew that, but his temper would not be reigned in. "It's Easter, we skate. Birthdays, we skate. I have the flu, we skate! I have a girlfriend in London I never see! I skate every day so you can play Dr. Frankenstein with this girl! I show up every morning for eighteen months, so you can give her two days to go partying in New York City?"

Leia sighed. "She went to Boston, not New York."

She might as well have gone to Timbuktu for all he cared. He couldn't believe this. If he was being honest, he wasn't so much upset that she left, but that she left without saying anything to him. He wasn't her keeper or anything, but he just thought they were closer than that. In a fit of pique that he'd regret later, he slammed the door in Leia's face and marched to his room. He flopped down on his bed, punching his helpless pillow. He knew he was overreacting, but he couldn't help it. Foolishly, he'd gotten complacent. He'd gotten used to Rey's presence in his life. Once this was all over, she'd leave, just like all the others. She had a family to go back to, a family she missed.

He'd probably head to London…and do what? Be Zorii's famous boyfriend? Why did that sound so anticlimactic?

He sighed and rubbed his eyes. He had a whole weekend to himself; he should make the most of it. He could still watch the movie. He'd done that before Rey barged into his life. He'd done a lot of things before Rey. He started to get up, but then noticed the album that lay on his nightstand. He thought he'd put it away; he must have forgotten. He picked it up, thumbing through the pages. Rey put this together for his birthday. She and Leia contacted a bunch of Shara's skating friends, asking for photos and memories. She gathered them all in this album. It meant a lot to him; he'd gotten a little choked up.

It was one of the best gifts he'd ever received.

He got lost in studying the pictures and reading the messages. By the time he looked up, it was nearly midnight. He'd start reclaiming his life without Rey tomorrow.

Rey walked confidently into the bar. It was Saturday night, but it didn't look busy yet. This was different from bars back home; this place was cramped and covered in old paneling. She'd Googled "dive bars in Boston;" this was the first one on the list. It was supposed to have live music, so that was a plus. No one really took notice of her as she entered; that was fine with her. For now.

She ordered a beer and took a seat at the bar. It had been a long time since she'd been out by herself. Her watering hole back home was her sister's bar; that hardly counted in Rey's opinion. She was here for some drinks, some music and maybe some company if anyone caught her eye.

This was her new plan. It was time she started moving on from this impossible crush. Why should she focus so much on someone she couldn't have when there were plenty of other guys out there? She'd never lacked for male companionship when she wanted it in Minnesota. Rose was into all that romance crap, but Rey just wasn't that kind of girl. She didn't want to let a man come between her and her dreams.

How ironic was it that a man was now the center of her dreams?

When she first came to Connecticut, she didn't expect any of this to happen. Being friends with Poe seemed like a pipe dream for a long time; being more than friends was insane. Rey wasn't blind. Poe was handsome. Attractive. Sexy as hell in his jeans. He was also an arrogant ass that had little idea of how the real world worked. However, no matter what he was, he wasn't hers. He'd never be hers. She needed to accept that and move the hell on.

She finished her first beer and ordered a second. "First time here?" the bartender asked.

"Um, yeah," she replied, accepting the bottle. "That obvious, huh?" He was cute in a blonde boy next door kind of way. The complete opposite of the current bane of her existence.

"Oh, you're English!" he said enthusiastically. "We don't get many tourists around here."

"I'm not a tourist. Okay, I sort of am," Rey conceded. "I moved here when I was small. I live in Minnesota."

"Still makes you a tourist."

"Yeah, I suppose it does."

The bartender passed her another bottle. "On the house in honor of your visit to our rebellious city."

Rey laughed; the guy did have a thick Boston accent. "I think the Queen's over it," she teased. "But thanks."

He gave her a little salute. "You need something, you ask for Mike. I'll hook you up."

"Is anyone playing tonight?"

Mike grinned. "Should be on in thirty or so. You like music?"

She grinned back. "I do actually."

"Good to know…"

"Rey. I'm Rey."

"Rey." Someone called for him. "I'll be back."

An hour later, Rey was out on the dance floor when she felt someone touch her arm. "Dance?" She recognized Mike's voice. She didn't usually dance without some liquid courage; fortunately, she'd had plenty. She turned and smiled, nodding. That was all he needed; Mike settled his hands on her hips as they started to move. She felt pleasantly buzzed; she couldn't remember the last time she just stopped thinking and enjoyed the moment like this. The cover band wasn't very good, but they didn't need to be. The place was filled with regulars; people came and went from the small part of the floor set aside for dancing.

Mike was taller than her, even in her heeled boots. She wasn't used to looking up at anyone. Poe was virtually the same height as her. Stop thinking about Poe, she chided herself. You're here to forget about him, remember?

"You okay?" Mike asked.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," Rey assured him. He had to go back to work, but he promised to be back the next time he had a break. Rey alternated between the bar and the dance floor; she had a few more drinks, but not enough to be drunk. Rey knew how to hold her liquor. She danced with a few more people, but Mike always came back. He was exactly what she was looking for, cute, attentive but not pushy, and judging by the way he held her, he was more than capable of showing her a good time.

The bar was open until two in the morning, but Mike got off at midnight. "You wanna get out of here?" he purred in her ear.

She bit her lip. "Sure." Rey paid her tab and Mike escorted her out into the night. It was a little chilly; Mike slipped his jacket over her shoulders. "Thanks."

"My place is a couple blocks down if you don't mind walking."

"I don't mind." She was surprised at how nervous she felt; it had been a while since she'd hooked up with someone. There just wasn't time with all the training she did. They arrived at Mike's apartment building; he held the elevator door open for her. Before the doors could close, he slanted his lips over hers. Rey blinked in surprise, her feet shuffling until she was against the wall.

"I've been waiting to do that all night."

He was kissing her again before Rey could respond; she tried to focus on him. She really did. But now that he was alone with her, he smelled all wrong. His touch was all wrong. Mike smelled of stale beer and sandalwood; her body wanted pine and old books. His touch was soft and gentle; she yearned for firm and steady. She wanted Poe, not this. Her traitorous heart wanted Poe. She stilled, turning her head away.

"Rey?"

"I'm sorry," she said sadly. "I thought I could do this, but…I can't. It's…"

"Not me?" Mike said with a knowing smile.

She nodded. "Cliché, but true."

He touched her cheek. "Whoever he is, he's very lucky."

Rey laughed mirthlessly. "Lucky. Right." She couldn't look Mike in the eye; she said her goodnights and didn't get off the elevator when it stopped. She paused long enough to give Mike his jacket back then took the elevator back down. She called an Uber to take her back to the hotel. This whole weekend was a bust. Why was this happening to her? Why did she want someone she couldn't have? She was going to get her heart good and broken and there was nothing she could do about it.

She headed home Sunday morning; there was no point in staying in the city. Leia stood at the top of the landing when she headed to the loft. "You're back early."

Rey shrugged. "Boston's pretty boring."

"Did you find what you were looking for?" her coach asked gently.

Rey hadn't told Leia why she needed to leave; Leia seemed to have figured it out anyway. "Not really."

"Rey…"

"It's fine. I'm a big girl. I can handle this." She dumped her bag just inside the doorway; she was exhausted, emotionally drained. But she'd gotten herself into this mess; she'd find a way out. After the Olympics. From now on, she'd focus on training. She could do that. She just needed to get through the next few months.

Rey sat on the edge of her bed, her head in hands. Her phone vibrated, but she ignored it. She didn't want to talk to anyone. She just wanted to veg out and sleep. At least then she could forget her handsome partner who'd wedged his way into her heart.

Unfortunately, the universe had other plans for her. There was an urgent knock on her door. "Rey? I saw you pull in. I know you're home."

"Fuck," she cursed under her breath. What the hell was Poe doing here? She got up and opened the door. Seeing him again was exquisitely painful knowing what she knew now. "Hi."

"You came back," he observed quietly. He seemed…upset? He refused to look her in the eye.

She frowned. "I was always coming back. I just needed…" She shrugged helplessly. "I don't really know."

"You didn't text. You didn't call me back. You really worried me, you know that?"

"I thought you'd appreciate the peace and quiet," she replied, one hand on her hip. "Leia knew where I was."

"Yeah, she told me. I just thought…I thought we were friends. Then you ditched movie night without a word. What was I supposed to think? I wondered if you were ditching me too."

"I would never do that, Poe. I'm committed to this." So much that I won't be the same after it's over, she thought bitterly. But that wasn't Poe's problem.

"I get needing time to yourself. If anyone gets that, it's me." He chuckled. "Just warn a guy first?"

"Deal."

He shuffled his feet and ran his fingers through his curls. "I didn't watch the movie. If you, um, wanted a second shot at movie night."

In for a penny, she thought, mustering her courage. "Sure, why not?"