CASE FILE #17854

The Pleasantview resident known as Don Lothario has been declared missing. A Repo-Man has discovered that the occupant has not been home at 150 Main Street for the past four weeks where he has failed to pay his bills each time. Although Lothario's last known whereabouts are currently up for debate, his connections have led us to believe that he was last seen with one of four women with whom he is speculated to have had some degree of a relationship with at the time of his disappearance.

This case is open and currently under investigation.

They hadn't realized it at the time, but in retrospect the chips began to fall on the day of Cassandra Goth's wedding. Or rather, what was supposed to be her wedding. Little did they know that that single, humiliating act on what was to be the best day of Cassandra's life was to be the spark that would ignite the flames to follow.

Little did they know that Don Lothario leaving his unsuspecting bride-to-be at the altar would be the key to uniting them all.

SUSPECT #1 CASSANDRA GOTH

"When was the last time you had been in contact with your ex-fiancé?"

The eyebrows creasing against Cassandra's forehead deepen into a sturdy frown, and for a moment her bottom lip twitches, as if wanting to speak but waiting for just the right words to come out.

"I haven't had any meaningful interactions with him since we broke up," is her curt reply, the muscles on her back stiffening. Her gaze drifts off to the side for a fleeting second, and she lets out a brief sigh. "I've seen him in public here and there, but we never spoke."

"Do you happen to know the names of anyone you suspect may have been in contact with him before his disappearance?"

Cassandra's eyes flicker away once more as a brief silence takes hold of her, but they ultimately return to meet the officer's prying stare. She tucks a loose strand of hair behind her ear, her gaze now unwavering as her lips move effortlessly to speak.

"I do not."

Kaylynn Langerak first catches wind of the broken engagement from the laments of Mary-Sue Pleasant, who openly shares her pities with her husband over the unjust heartbreak of her dearest friend. Daniel Pleasant nods sympathetically as Mary-Sue prattles on, but Kaylynn knows all too well that he is doing nothing more than humoring her while her words slip through his empty head.

And just as Mary-Sue had been cast away in the dark of her and Daniel's long-running affair, Kaylynn too had not caught on to Don's womanizing ways. She bites her lip and forces down the tears that threaten to surface, continuing to dust around the Pleasant home while purposefully averting her eyes from Daniel's sweeping glances. How it stings to be on the receiving end of an affair, to be the one who is being played while all this time thinking you were the player.

Foolish girl.

Guilt clenches around Kaylynn's chest in intricate knots, refusing to release her from its burly grip. I just wanted a family, she tells herself, almost believing that her idyllic ends justify her dirty means. But reality shakes her deep within her bones, and it becomes clear that neither Daniel Pleasant nor Don Lothario are men worthy of families, let alone worthy of women.

Kaylynn cuts her ties with Daniel the same day he tries to get her into bed. As she descends down the porch steps, now fired, Mary-Sue passes her, head hung low. Kaylynn glances over her shoulder, eyebrows furrowing. Mary-Sue is never home this early. Something must've happened.

Daniel Pleasant is a simple man with simple desires. Kaylynn knows she was merely a short-term escape to his problems and never the long-term answer she had often hoped she would be, no matter how many times she had deceived herself thinking she could be anything more than a flimsy distraction. He will move on from their break up quickly; Kaylynn is sure. He will hire another maid and make the same mistakes with the new one as he had with Kaylynn.

But Don Lothario?

Kaylynn doesn't cut her ties with him.

Not yet.

SUSPECT #2 KAYLYNN LANGERAK

"You are Don Lothario's maid, correct?"

Kaylynn tilts her head and gives the officer a subtle smile and a toss of her hair.

"Well," she says, batting her eyes, "I'm the maid for pretty much everybody here in town."

An unamused grunt escapes the officer as he scratches something down with his pen.

"How come you never filed a missing persons report when you are regularly scheduled to clean his house?" the officer asks, this time with a little more bite in his tone. "Surely you must've noticed something was wrong a long time ago."

Kaylynn shrugs, her expression unfazed by the officer's baiting comments. "He's often gone when I come to clean." She gestures softly with her hands. "A man who's out and about, I suppose."

"When was the last time you saw him in person, then?"

Kaylynn shoots the officer a bemused look. "You can't expect me to remember that, can you?" she asks, incredulous. "I do a lot of work around here. I don't keep track of everybody."

The officer grits his teeth. "Answer the question, Miss Langerak."

Kaylynn narrows her eyes, her once-soft features now hardening into a deeper stare. She then lets out an airy sigh, laying an open palm against her cheek as she leans her elbow against the interrogation table in front of her.

"You know, I really can't seem to recall."

Nina Caliente doesn't understand how Don Lothario thought he could almost go through with an engagement and not have her find out about it. The entire town knows about it at this point, and it's honestly insulting to think that she wouldn't either.

Immediately following the infamous act of leaving Cassandra Goth at the altar, Don had called up Nina to reassure her that she was the only woman for him, and that the ensuing affair was nothing more than a one-sided delusion on Cassandra's part, the ravings of—and this is verbatim—"an erotomanic recluse." Thinking that this explanation had been sufficient enough to pacify her, Don had quickly shifted the conversation to their date next week, subtly urging Nina to wear that one dress, and there was no more to be discussed about the rumors that had encased his reputation.

Mascara streaking down her cheeks as she screams, Nina punches her bathroom mirror until her knuckles bleed.

SUSPECT #3 NINA CALIENTE

"Could you describe the nature of your relationship with Don Lothario?"

Nina clutches her chest tightly, a forlorn expression painted across her face as if it had been crafted by a masterful artist. She wipes a single tear that threatens to run down her face as she takes a moment to gather her thoughts, a pained look in her eyes as she speaks.

"God, I love him," Nina says with a heavy sigh. "I don't think I've loved anyone more than I love him."

"So you and him were in a committed relationship prior to his disappearance?"

Nina gives the officer a firm nod, maintaining her disheartened expression. "He's still out there," she insists. "I know he is." Her voice falls into a broken hush, eyes drifting downwards. "You guys won't stop looking for him… right?"

"Were you aware that Don Lothario had been in a relationship with another woman during the same time he was involved with you?"

The tip of Nina's nose wrinkles slightly, but she holds face, not letting the words cause her to falter. She parts her mouth in shock, eyeing the officer in front of her with a look of utter bewilderment.

"You lie," Nina says, lips trembling. Her eyes pop out like bugs, fists tightening in her grip as her voice quakes with fury. "Don would never do that to me!"

The officer furrows his brow as he shoots her a curious look. "So up until this point, you had no prior knowledge of his affair and subsequent broken engagement to Cassandra Goth?"

Nina swallows and shakes her head furiously.

"Of course not."

When Dina Caliente finally comes home after a night of drinking and dancing, she finds her sister curled up on the sofa under a blanket and sobbing into the cushions, the glow of the television the only source of light in the otherwise darkened room. Dina cants her head, face scrunching up in sympathy as she flicks on the lights and takes a gentle seat at the edge of the couch, patting Nina softly.

"Did someone's favorite contestant on Singles Island get kicked off again?" Dina asks quietly as Nina's uncharismatic sniffles overtake the shows playing in the background. Her tone is half-mocking, half-serious, but all-around mere lighthearted teasing.

Nina rolls onto her stomach and buries herself further within her blanket of misery, her voice muffled against the seat but the aggravation in her tone unmistakable. "Bitch, I'm having an actual crisis right now."

Dina pauses for a moment, eyebrows creasing in thought. "That's exactly what you said when Zeeshan Kimbrell was voted out last season," she says with a delicate hum.

Tossing herself over to shoot Dina a murderous glare, Nina makes no attempt to mask the venom that drips from every word that escapes her breath. "Screw you." Then, for added measure, Nina gives Dina a solid kick, enough to cause her sister to topple onto the ground.

Dina gasps as she plants forward, whipping her head back to scowl at Nina. "What's your problem?" she hisses, picking herself up and straightening out the wrinkles that now line her dress.

"What's my problem?" Nina asks, incredulous. "Sorry I'm not acting like everything's all sunshine and rose petals after finding out my boyfriend cheated on me with the ugliest bitch in town!"

Dina crosses her arms, a curt sigh to follow. "Nina," she begins in a gentle scold, "for the last time, the cute weatherman on SBN is not your boyfriend."

An infuriated screech erupts from the back of Nina's throat as she hastily grabs a nearby lampshade and throws it against the wall, causing its bulb to shatter. Dina jolts in place from Nina's unexpected lashing out, mouth agape as her eyes remain fixated on her sister, utterly speechless.

"Don Lothario is a good-for-nothing jackass and I want him dead," Nina finally musters after an elongated pause, the cracks in her voice evident as she breaks down into the palms of her hands.

Using one hand to cover her mouth as she takes a single step back, Dina gasps softly, realization dawning upon her as Nina continues to sob. "You were dating… Don?"

Nina doesn't even fight the urge to roll her eyes, the biting sarcasm leaking profusely from her tone. "No, bitch. I'm obviously just making this up for shits and giggles."

Dina gnaws at the bottom of her lip as she runs a tense hand through her thicket of blonde hair. "Guess this is a bad time to mention that I've been seeing him off and on casually." When Nina pauses to wipe away her tears and gawk at Dina with wide eyes, Dina frowns and shakes her head in disbelief. "Shit. And I thought I was a two-timing whore. But Don Lothario's a three-timing whore."

The veins on Nina's forehead are on the cusp of exploding. "How could you?" she asks through gritted teeth. "You bitch!"

Dina scrunches her face, taken aback. "Hey," she says, some offense in her tone, "I had no clue you were dating him. I had no clue you were dating anyone." She scratches the back of her neck and shrugs. "You gotta hand it to him, though. He was able to date both of us and Cassandra without any of us knowing. And I frequent the Goth Manor. Wow. Man's got a gift."

"He's got something coming for him, I'll give him that," Nina says, the darkness taking hold.

Dina flashes a cheeky grin. "What do you have in mind?"

SUSPECT #4 DINA CALIENTE

"What can you tell us about your sister's relationship with Don Lothario?"

Dina shrugs in her seat, rocking her head back and forth as if to take her time contemplating. She lets out a small puff of air through her lips, humming slightly.

"She really doesn't like talking to me about her love life," Dina says with a disinterested flicker of her gaze. "Honestly, I barely even knew they had a thing until recently." She gives the officer an apologetic frown. "Sorry. Can't really say what they were like together when I hardly knew they were together. I'm not very useful, unfortunately."

The officer maintains an unsettling stare from across the interrogation table, eye-contact unwavering.

"Uh-huh," he says, not even attempting to hide his blatant skepticism. "And where were you on the presumed night of his disappearance?"

Dina smiles.

"I was with some friends."

As Dina and Nina approach the front steps of Goth Manor, it is Dina who extends a sympathetic look toward her sister.

"You sure about this?" she asks, a hint of wariness lacing the edge of her voice. "You sure you're ready?"

Nina scoffs, letting out an irritated huff as she stomps past Dina and rings the doorbell. "Don't doubt me, bitch. This was my idea."

When Cassandra Goth opens the door by just a crack, her first reaction is toward Dina, and she shoots her an awkward glance while adjusting her glasses at the bridge of her nose.

"Dad's out buying groceries," Cassandra says, shifting in her stance. "But he should be back in an hour."

Dina waves away her comment with a simple flick of her hand. "You're the one we want, dear."

Cassandra narrows her eyes in confusion. "I—"

"Don Lothario played you," Nina interjects, arms folded across her chest as she holds a spiteful glare. "He played me too." A sinister grin tugs at the corners of her lips. "I say we get even with him."

For a moment, Cassandra is stunned, her expression locked into a frozen state to which no one holds the key. Her eyebrows lift and her mouth hangs ajar, but that soon carves itself into an incredulous, bitter smile as she gently shakes her head, sideways ponytails bouncing slightly with it.

"Okay," she says, rather simply.

Nina and Dina trade conniving glances. "Perfect," Nina says, eyes gleaming with mischief. "First—"

"Wait," Cassandra says.

Nina looks utterly appalled at the notion of someone talking over her, but Dina stops her from making a snappy remark with a simple tap on the shoulder. Cassandra tugs at the sleeves of her own arms, sighing softly.

"Just so you know," Cassandra continues, "you aren't the first person Don's been with who has reached out to me."

And when she fully opens the door to invite them inside, they find Kaylynn Langerak sitting right around the corner.

"What do you think?" Demi Love asks when she swings around Dorian Kauker's desk in the midst of him rifling through his notes. "Do we have a culprit?"

Dorian rubs his temples and releases a disgruntled sigh. "I don't trust those women," he says, chewing at the cap of his pen. "Not a single one of them. And yet I've got jack shit."

Demi squeezes his shoulder. "You think Lothario's dead?"

Dorian leans forward in his chair, hands clasping together neatly as he deepens his frown.

"I think there's more to the story than what they're letting on."

One week after the Cassandra Goth wedding fiasco, tonight is all about Don Lothario's date with Nina Caliente.

Truth be told, it stings a little to lose someone so incredibly wealthy, to be, once again, the one expected to pay for dinner when all the times he had been with Cassandra, she had been the one to spoil him rotten. But Nina is far more captivating than bland and gloomy Cassandra, and fortunately for him, not as bright. Don's got all the luck in the world to convince Nina to stick with him, and this is while still getting to casually flirt with her sister. And to top it off, Kaylynn's ignorance is bliss for him and her both. He may not have a sugar mama anymore, but he's still sitting pretty.

So he gussies himself up with one of his nicer shirts and sprays on a heavy waft of cologne that nearly drenches him. He slicks back his hair with a semi-thick layer of gel and pops in a stick of mint gum to chew on the walk to the Caliente home. He walks with the swagger and confidence of a man who can't be brought down by the consequences of his own actions, who has no consequences of any sort.

As soon as Nina opens the door, she drags him in by the waist, peppering light kisses all over his face and neck as she giggles and leads him further inside. Don reflexively reaches for her ass as he is drawn toward her magnetic pull, but his eyes shoot out immediately when the door clicks shut.

Because they're halfway across the room.

Don pulls away from Nina and whips around to find Dina Caliente blocking the door, hands on her hips and her head canted off to the side. Before he can manage to conjure a single word as he turns to face Nina, he is met with a forceful shove from the aforementioned woman, causing him to stumble back and into the arms of someone else. When he lifts his gaze, his mouth parts in shock when his eyes do not meet that of Dina, but of Kaylynn Langerak.

"There's someone who wants to see you," she says with a wily smile.

Kaylynn spits on Don's face as she kicks him in the shins, causing him to crumple to the floor and hiss out in pain. Too dumbstruck and caught off-guard to even comprehend what is happening at the moment, Don doesn't utter a single word as he raises his head to glimpse up at all the women he has scorned. Then, emerging from the kitchen with her arms crossed and wearing a cold, dead expression is none other than his ex-fiancée, Cassandra Goth.

Finally, Don speaks, a mixture of fear and anger settling deep within his voice as realization strikes him like a punch to the face.

"What are you planning on doing?"

The women say nothing.

Instead, they laugh.

"Take a look at this."

Demi slams the printed article on Dorian's desk just as he is about to take a sip of his morning coffee. Dorian picks up the article and scans it with a jaded expression, eyes widening with every sentence that follows the previous one. His jaw nearly drops to the floor.

"Lothario's been found?"

Demi nods and places a hand to her chin. "Yeah, but get this." She points to a paragraph down the page and taps it lightly. "He's old as shit."

Dorian shakes his head. "That can't be the same guy. Old man must've stolen his identity."

Demi shrugs and whisks the article away from Dorian's fingertips. "Believe what you want, Kauker," she says with a small huff. "But I think that old man really is Don Lothario."

Dorian scoffs. "That's impossible."

Demi tilts her head and steals a sip of Dorian's coffee.

"Is it?"

When Don Lothario dies of old age, the four of them drive to Riverview together to dance on his grave.

Fin.