A/N: Hey guys, sorry for the insanely long wait. Hope everyone is doing well and staying safe, healthy and indoors. Hope this provides some much-needed distraction.

Three months earlier…

Veronica parked her car in the parking lot of the little seaside bistro that she used to frequent with Duncan in the years after they broke up, but needed a little reprieve from some of the crazy happening in their lives. Logan and Lily were both forces of nature, and while Veronica could be a whirlwind in her own right, sometimes she and Duncan needed a breather from the shenanigans that the other half of their little group got up to. Through the years after high school it had been a little something that they tried to keep up, just the two of them. They had managed to form a pretty solid friendship after they had broken up, and when Meg had gotten pregnant, Veronica had been one of the few people who stuck by the couple through hell and high water and helped them out when things became a bit overwhelming. Both she and Duncan were very proud of the friendship they had managed to form and maintain despite being exes. And she knew Meg had grown grateful as well, despite her earlier reservations.

Duncan and Veronica had been the it-couple of Neptune High for their Sophomore year, but had broken up when questions of Veronica's paternity had been raised. They had been the king and queen of Neptune High and had reigned supreme for a year. It had been a great year for Veronica. She had had anything she had ever wanted, or thought she had wanted. Hindsight really was 20/20. In the end they found out that Keith Mars was her biological father, and not Jake Kane. The damage to her relationship with Duncan however, had been done. Neither Veronica nor Duncan had felt particularly comfortable continuing their relationship, and while a lot of tears were involved, mostly on Duncan's part, Veronica had been ready to admit to herself that she just wasn't in love with him anymore. He presented some sort of young, naïve love she associated with her pastel colored wardrobe and pep squad past. And after her mother and Jake's infidelity had been exposed and they'd run off together it had broken an innocence in her that everyone except Logan had found quintessential Veronica. She had needed to grow up and step up for her dad, and it had changed her entire view on life and love. She would never call herself cynical but she'd be lying if she said the whole experience hadn't made her a bit jaded.

Shortly after the drama that was their Sophomore year, Duncan had started dating Meg; and after the fiftieth break-up between Logan and Lilly, Veronica and Logan had gravitated towards each other and had come out as a couple after months of 'testing the waters' as she called it, all with Lilly and Duncan's blessing. If she was being completely honest, Lilly had been the proponent of a Logan-Veronica relationship, and that had made everything much easier. At least for the first couple of months.

She and Logan had been as volatile as ever, both too young and dumb to get their shit together; both jaded, destructive and dealing with a massive chip on their shoulder. When they broke up the summer of Junior to Senior year, she was amazed that she managed to, once again maintain a successful friendship with an ex-boyfriend. It took a while and some cajoling from their mutual friends, but in the end they managed to somewhat peacefully coexist in the same group of friends, trading barbs and sarcastic comments. It was one of his better qualities, his ability to match her wit.

Meg got pregnant their Senior year and, much to the chagrin of Celeste and the Mannings, who had tried to force Meg to get an abortion, had a beautiful daughter that she and Duncan named Summer. Lilly and Logan were named godparents and Veronica swung by often enough for auntie duty. The shared time spent together, and seeing Logan do so well with a baby - which she would deny until the day she died - made her realize what she already knew, and she and Logan struck up their romance once more after their high school graduation and all into their first year at Hearst.

Veronica had started helping out her dad when he became a private investigator. He had lost the election after the news of Lianne's infidelity broke, and even though it wasn't his fault in the least, the town still lost respect or faith in him. Veronica wasn't sure which, all she knew was that it pissed her off. Still did.

Still, it had brought some good with it. Alicia Fennel had walked in one day, asking for Keith's help with a difficult tenant, and that had resulted in not only her dad finding new love, but in her finding another best friend named Wallace. He was a breath of fresh air compared to Lilly and the other 09'ers - who had welcomed Wallace into their group with open arms. Hanging out with Wallace felt like a little reprieve from the privileged, gilded gates of the 09'ers. She loved her friends, she really did, but it was nice to have a friend who understood what it was like to have to work to earn your own money and that you couldn't just fly off to Cabo whenever you felt like it.

Veronica had a natural knack for solving cases and sticking her nose where it didn't belong, as she fondly recalled the way Logan had described her once. And while the Hearst rapist case had put a strain on their relationship and made them break up for a little while, it was ultimately Logan's betrayal by way of sleeping with Madison that did it for her. A couple months later she had started dating Piz, Wallace's Hearst roommate. Logan dated a string of random girls… not that she'd paid attention or anything.

When a sex tape leaked of her and Piz, Logan had gone full Terminator on him, wrongfully assuming Piz had been the one filming them. That had been a whole other story. Unfortunately, that meant the end of her friendship with Logan. Piz and her broke up shortly after and now he was dating someone named Parker who she vaguely remembered from her college days. Mac had a few classes with her, but that was all she could remember about the girl. Still, she seemed nice enough. And after banishing Logan from her life; her, Piz and Parker actually managed to become friends. She was sensing an ex-boyfriend trend here.

Before she could dwell on her dating history any longer, she smiled as she saw Duncan sitting at one of the tables at the window. It was a tad too breezy to sit outdoors but they both loved a good view.

"Hey!" She said cheerily and smiled when he almost dropped his cellphone, startled by her sudden appearance.

"I know you need to be quiet when you're on the job, but do you need to sneak up on your friends like that?"

"Not all friends, just ex-boyfriends," she quipped.

Duncan rolled his eyes at her good-naturedly and signaled the waiter over to order a bottle of water for the table.

"So, how's tricks?" Veronica asked, not even bothering to pick up a menu. The place served the best fish cakes west of Maine and while she knew it was good to expand her horizons once in a while, the fishcakes here were a staple and her horizons went far enough.

"You're not even going to bother looking at the menu?" Duncan asked, already knowing the answer and proving her point.

She scoffed, "please. the best west of Maine, Duncan."

"Yeah, yeah, you tell me every time."

"Well, you point it out every time."

Their waiter arrived with their water, took their orders and left them to catch up. Duncan was telling her about the children and how his mother seemed to be interfering more than usual. It was driving Meg nuts.

"So last weekend she just totally blew a gasket."

"Who? Your mom or Meg?"

"Meg."

"What? Oh, please tell me you've got that on tape." Celeste had never been Veronica's biggest fan and the feeling was mutual.

"You would have loved it."

"Oh man, why do I have to miss all the good stuff?" Veronica pouted, playing around with her now empty glass of water.

"Well," Duncan started delicately, "you didn't have to miss it, you know."

Veronica had to exercise an insane amount of restraint to not roll her eyes. "Duncan, it's just too hard…"

"It's been nine years, Veronica. Don't you think you've punished him enough?"

"No."

Duncan gave her a stern look.

"Duncan," Veronica sighed, "it was never about punishing him. You know that. Logan and I, we just don't work together, okay? We don't mesh." She intertwined her hands in order to demonstrate what she meant.

"It's been nine years, Veronica. Nine. You could at least be in the same room together for the sake of your friends and their kids. One of whom is your godchild."

Veronica shrugged.

"He's dating someone," Duncan added slyly, "has been for little over two years now." He had a hunch, or not really a hunch, more like an obvious evidence to anyone who wasn't blind.

Veronica shrugged once more, completely fascinated by her cutlery. "So?"

"So, if he's over you and you're over him, shouldn't it not be an issue?"

"That is not the point!" She denied vehemently.

"Okay, so if you're over him, and this is not just for the sake of punishing him, then what is it about? And don't give me that meshing bullshit, because the two of you get along better than most couples I know."

"Well, it's not like he cares anyway, so why do you?"

"Oh, he cares."

"Really? It's not like I've gotten any phone calls or texts over the years."

"Veronica, he tried to protect you from what he felt was a bad situation, granted he punches first and asks questions later, and that wasn't very correct of him, but he did that because he loves you. And then you told him you never wanted to see him again, you move away to Stanford, say goodbye to everyone but him, and now you're upset he hasn't texted? You should've been the one to reach out when you moved back."

"Well, if I had known I would have been served the third degree with my fish cakes I would have ordered something else today."

Duncan smiled, "don't be so dramatic, you know I care about both you. I just feel bad that it has to be either you or Logan at events with mutual friends."

She was stabbing into her fish cakes more aggressively than she meant to, but this conversation was irking her. She knew Duncan was right, and she hated feeling so guilty.

Duncan took a swig of his water and grinned at her with a twinkle in his eye. His job here was done. She was stubborn as a donkey, but she always came around in the end.

Veronica headed home and decided to make a pit stop at Dog Beach. She had loved coming here with Backup when she'd been in High School and all through college. She started walking aimlessly in one direction, reminiscing the dog that had sadly passed away a couple of years earlier. The water always had a calming effect on her, and she needed it after her lunch with Duncan. Work was a bit slow now, so she figured she could take an hour or so to regroup at the beach. Duncan did have a point. Why was she still so adamant that her and Logan never cross paths? It surprised her sometimes that she managed to avoid Logan in a town like Neptune. While it wasn't a teeny, tiny hamlet, they did both travel in the same circles, frequented the same spots in Neptune, and yet somehow fate had kept them apart all these years. Granted, they had only both moved back a couple of years ago - she from New York and him from Los Angeles - but still, three years, and not one single run-in. Did she even feel the need to run into him? She wouldn't even bother asking herself if she missed him. She knew the answer to that, it had been the same answer from the moment she closed the door on their friendship nine years ago. Everyone had thought she was cold, being able to just cut him off without so much as a bit of heartache. But it was self-preservation, and that was very Veronica. She hadn't let anyone into her pain. That was very Veronica as well. What had been a hammer to her glass heart, shattering it in a million pieces and stabbing little splinters of pain through her body had, after all this time, graduated to a dull pain that she carried with her everyday. She had learned to manage the pain over the years. She dated other guys who were nothing like Logan, avoided situations where she knew he would be, and didn't follow him on social media. Her family and friends had learned to not even broach the subject of Logan around her, and some days she almost doubted if he had ever existed.

She had fucked up. He had been one of the two most important people in her life and she had screwed it up. If she was honest with herself, she knew she was too stubborn to admit that she was wrong.

She exhaled. Deep, and long. And again. And again. Consistent with the ebb and flow of the Pacific Ocean in front of her. Before she knew it, she was watching the sun descend into darkness amidst a whirl of pinks and oranges, and she decided to head home. She hadn't figured anything out.

The weeks that followed had Duncan badgering Veronica about Logan a couple more times until he finally decided to give up. He knew when it was no use, and pushing her was never the way to go. She needed to realize some things on her own, that much he knew. She was relieved that he'd dropped the discussion. It wasn't that she didn't trust Duncan. He wouldn't tell anyone, this much she knew, and he would definitely not tell Logan. He was one of her oldest friends and she knew she could tell him anything, lean on him for anything, but she was afraid he would ask her questions she didn't want to answer. Or maybe she just wasn't ready to answer them.

"Do you love him?"

She could imagine Logan saying those four words. She didn't know.

"I think I could have loved him, but maybe I just need to let it go."

There is a quote in a movie about being secretly in love with each other, and just leaving it at that. And she preferred to naïvely hold on to that.

He sent her a few random texts out of the blue, trying to catch her off guard and ask questions that might throw her off and, in a moment of weakness, reveal something about her current feelings towards Logan.

"If you don't drop it, I will never babysit your kids for free again," she hissed into her phone one evening while she was in the supermarket after work, desperately trying to find a way to make dinner without having to put too much effort in and without resorting to frozen crap.

"You love my kids, of course you'll keep babysitting them," he had replied swiftly. They both knew he was right.

"Yes, but I'll charge accordingly. I know how much you're worth, Kane."

She had babysat them the previous weekend and smiled at the memory. Summer was ten, and a sweet little girl. She was quite girly and enjoyed wearing pretty dresses, she also enjoyed kicking around a football and drawing. Her younger brother, Phil, was six and was a rambunctious little boy. All blonde hair, like his mom, (Summer had brown hair like her dad). He loved to cuddle and to run around the yard. she always left their house intensely happy but exhausted, wondering how all parents did it, and glad she could give the little rascals back at the end of the day.

That particularly Wednesday had started off well enough. Veronica had gone to the gym early

in the morning, and even managed to stop by her favorite little fruit grocer to get a smoothie afterwards. She had gotten to work with half an hour to spare and made herself a bowl of oatmeal as she got a head start on her day. It was tough to drag herself out of bed that early, but she always felt more productive and accomplished when she managed to focus her energy elsewhere before she gave her full attention to the drama that her job entailed. She had quite some research to do for a particularly difficult case and wanted to make sure she got as much in before her first meeting of the day at noon.

She was so focused on what was going on on her screen that she missed all the calls lighting up her smartphone. She had purposely placed it upside down, something she did often when she didn't want to be disturbed at all, but she usually did check it once or twice.

It was 11.30 by the time she saw that her dad, Wallace and Lilly had all collectively called her 23 times.

She went to open up one of the many "Veronica, pick up your phone now. It's urgent!" texts, wondering what could possibly be the reason for their calls and when they had all turned into such drama queens. She dialed the most urgent caller back, and waited for her dad to answer. He picked up almost immediately.

"Finally!"

She could tell he was exasperated and she felt a bit miffed. It's not like she was a teenager anymore, she knew what she was doing. Her mood changed when she heard the frantic and frightened tone in his next sentence, "I've been trying to reach you all morning".

"Yes, I've noticed. Twenty-three missed calls between you, Wallace and Lilly. What's going on?"

There was a moment of silence.

"Dad, you're scaring me." She started to get nervous, wondering what could have possibly happened. There was a cold silence on the other end of the line, and her dad was never silent.

"Are you at your desk, or somewhere alone?"

"I'm at my desk. Why? What's going on?"

"Are you alone?"

"You're scaring me," she knew she was repeating herself but she wasn't sure he heard her the first time. She felt anxiety creeping into her stomach and she started to feel really warm all over. She desperately wanted a glass of water but didn't feel like she could swallow anything right now.

"I'm alone."

Keith took a deep breath, "there was an accident last night."

Her stomach lurched. "Who?" she asked. She realized who it was before he even replied. She had no missed calls from Duncan. If something else had been wrong, his name would have been on her missed calls list along with Lilly and Wallace.

"Duncan and Meg."

"And the kids?"

"They're fine, they were at home."

There was a heavy silence between them as she didn't dare ask the question she really didn't want an answer to.

"Are they okay?" she asked in a small voice.

"I'm so sorry," her dad said softly. She had never heard him speak so sadly.

She placed her head in her free hand, not daring to speak. The air was heavy and thick, and her throat felt constricted, a huge lump starting to form.

"What happened?" Her voice broke slightly and she cleared it.

"Someone hit them from the side, ran a red light. The police are still investigating, they don't know if the driver was drunk or not."

"I saw him last weekend. I talked to him yesterday afternoon, I…"

"Sweetie, do you want to come home for the afternoon?"

"No, I'm-" she cleared her throat and continued very quickly, afraid that if she didn't get everything out in one breath she might start crying on the phone, "-I have a meeting in ten minutes so I'll talk to you later."

"Honey, I really think—"

"No," she replied shortly. "I'll call you later okay? I just need a minute."

"Call me after, okay?" her dad asked before she murmured a quick "mhmm" and hung up.

Her screen turned blurry as she burst into tears.

Alright, well now we're all caught up timeline wise. Hope the backstory tot eh relationships is a bit clear as well. Since it's not the focus nor point of the story I didn't spend a lot of time explaining it, so if you have any questions, just ask! :-)