Will's POV
The house was unusually quiet when I got up, considerably later than usual, to let the dogs out before work, although it didn't hit me what was particularly different this morning from any other til I opened the front door and Sammy, who normally slept with Joan and got up when she did, was missing from the rest.
I peered into the kitchen to find that she, evidently, hadn't gotten up yet.
She's never slept in this late…...has she? I tried to rack my brain, but nothing came up. Is it even that late?
I started to look down at my watch when I heard Joan's footsteps, followed by the familiar jangle of Sammy's collar right behind her, coming down the stairs. She seemed a little off as she kept looking back at her phone, as if waiting for an important call.
"Everything okay?" I asked as the dogs, one by one, came rushing past me to get back into the house.
"No...yes…? I Don't know." She sighed. "I crashed last night after Jocelyn left, which I've never done before she's texted me that she was home, and she didn't even try to get a hold of me."
"Did you try texting her?" I asked.
"Twice. Once when I first woke up a couple hours ago, and then right before I came downstairs."
A couple hours ago. Was it really that late? I tried to just shake it off. "Well, maybe she just crashed too."
"Maybe, but it's really not like her." She shrugged. "...If she hasn't called or messaged me in about an hour, I'll try her brother."
"That's fair."
She nodded. "Aren't you running late for work?"
I glanced down at my watch. "I...am. But are you going to be okay here?"
She nodded. "Yeah, I should be. Might take the dogs back out in a while, try and get my mind off of things."
"I'm sure they'll appreciate that." I offered, trying to keep things...somewhat light.
"Yeeep." She sighed.
"Alright, well I'm going to get going then. Let me know if you hear from her."
"I will." She nodded. "See you later."
"Bye."
I tried to shake this morning's revelation as I walked across a beach in Grafton, West Virginia to meet up with Jack at the scene of the latest crime.
I sighed as we approached what appeared to be a massive totem pole, composed entirely of human bodies.
"The head piece appears to be the only recent victim." Jack explained. "...the others are years, even decades old….then we know that seven of the bodies were buried here."
"Whoever dug them up knew exactly where they were buried." I told him.
"I guess it wasn't enough for him to kill his victims once, he had to come back and defile his victims."
"These graves weren't desecrated, Jack." I corrected him. "...they were exposed."
After taking another moment to look it all over, he ordered everyone else to clear away from the crime scene to allow me to see myself as the killer.
I saw myself crossing from where I stood to the pile of bodies.
"I plan this moment, this monument, with precision….I collected all my raw materials in advance.
I position the bodies carefully, according each in its rightful place...piece, and the pieces disassembled.
I visualize the latest victim, a man, tied up. His screams are muffled,
"My latest victim...I save for last. I want him to watch me work, I want him to know my design.
He continues to struggle as he watches me stand up, after wrapping up with the other victims, and walk slowly over to him with a knife.
I stab him through the chest with it...and watch him die.
"This is my resume, this is my body of work. This...is my legacy."
I was standing there, gazing over the totem pole, yet somehow, before I knew it, I found myself standing in Hannibal's waiting room. But...how?
I looked around, anxiously trying to assess how I'd gotten there, when Hannibal interrupted my train of thought.
"Will! I wasn't expecting you."
"I don't know how I got here!" I blurted out loud, pacing around his office.
"Your car is outside, so we know you drove." He explained, calmly.
"Wha- I-I was on a beach, in Grafton, West Virginia...a- and then I blinked, a- and I was waking up in your waiting room, except I wasn't asleep!"
"Grafton, West Virginia is three and a half hours from here. You lost time." He added.
"I think there is something wrong with me."
"You're disassociating, Will. It's a desperate survival mechanism for a psyche that endures repeated abuse."
"I'm not abused!" I insisted.
"You have an empathy disorder. What you feel is overwhelming you."
"I know, I know-"
"..Yet you choose to ignore it." He explained. "That's the abuse I'm referring to."
"You want me to quit? "
"Jack Crawford gave you a chance to quit and you didn't take it. Why?" He asked.
"I save lives."
"And that feels good." More a statement than a question.
"Generally speaking, yeah."
"What about your life? I'm your friend, Will. I don't care about the lives you save. I care about your life. And your life is separating from reality."
"I've been sleepwalking. I'm experiencing hallucinations. Maybe I should get a brain scan."
"Will!" He exclaimed. "Stop looking in the wrong corner for an answer to this….You were at a crime scene when you disassociated. Tell me about it."
"It was a totem pole of bodies."
"In some cultures, crimes and guilt are made manifest so that everyone can see them and see their shame."
"No, this isn't shame. It's a celebration. He's marking his achievements."
"And faced with this killer's achievements, your mind needed to escape and you lost time." He explained."
That makes sense. "...Yes."
"I'm worried about you, Will…..You empathize so completely with the killers Jack Crawford has your mind wrapped around that you lose yourself to them. What if you lose time and hurt yourself or someone else? I don't want you to wake up and see a totem of your own making."
It was late when I walked in the door, Joan was laying across the couch in front of the TV with Sammy….If I hadn't been so preoccupied with trying to wrap my head around what happened at Hannibal's office today, I might've noticed that she wasn't back to being herself yet either.
I tried collect myself when she noticed me.
"Still no word from Jocelyn…" She sighed.
"Huh?" It took me another moment to remember what had happened before the incident. "Oh, right.
She sat up, watching me uneasily. "...Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, I'm just- I'm sorry you haven't heard from Jocelyn. I hope she's okay."
"Right…." She hesitated before speaking again. "My question still feels unanswered though, you seem off."
"It's- ah..It's nothing to worry about." I lied. "Just a rough day today."
"Right…" She repeated, still not quite satisfied with my answer. "Alright, well, I'm gonna head upstairs soon."
"Okay...did you eat?"
"Yeah, I had some leftovers a little while ago." She answered, still uneasy.
I nodded. "Alright, well, I'm gonna take the dogs out before I turn in.
"Sounds good."