Ridley was furious. That was usually how he felt when he wasn't busy ripping people into pieces, but he was in an exceptionally bad mood that day.

This body annoyed and disgusted him to no end. He always hated humans for how weak and pathetic they were. A species like that didn't deserve to live, let alone explore the stars. He and his fellow Space Pirates always believed in their natural superiority. They were forged by harsh environments of their planets into efficient killing machines. Their eyes found their prey hiding in the shadows, their claws tore into their victims and their fangs rended flesh into shreds.

He wasn't actually any weaker in this form and he wasn't human either, but mere association with that filth infuriated him. It was also too different for him to be even remotely comfortable. His neck was too short and didn't bend the right way, his head was too short, his jaw easily shifted sideways instead of being locked to only open and close, his eyes weren't facing the right way, his hands had an extra finger, his feet were just plain wrong, his voice annoyed him and he was too small. He hated being small. The last time he had to look up at Samus was shortly after his revival by those clueless humans who treated him like a pet until the time came for him to treat them like biomass to consume in order to develop his body.

The Space Pirate had to fix this as soon as possible. It was obvious to him that magic was involved and since he didn't believe that his world had anything of the sort, he couldn't solve this problem on his own. That meant asking for help, which was by no means an easy task given how everyone treated him here for very good reasons. His options were very limited.

He opens a door and slams it behind himself as he enters a room lit by torches. The room in question was rebranded as some sort of a "villain-only room" by one of the few beings who used it. Not everyone invited actually came there often because they were either busy or not interested. At that moment, there were only two people there aside from Ridley, one of them being the King of Koopas and the other being the Great King of Evil. Both were sitting at a table, apparently in the middle of some discussion that was rudely interrupted. The former was also holding a half-empty cup of tea way too small for his hands.

"Huh? What's a pipsqueak like you doing here? Scram!" Bowser shouted, trying to shoo away the strange girl.

"There is only one beast here who exudes such malignant air...What brings you here, O Cunning God of Death?" - Ganondorf said with a mocking tone of voice.

Ridley didn't like them at all. Bowser was a joke to him. All bark and no bite. He'd call him a little bitch and call it a day if the overgrown turtle simply didn't have the guts to kill his enemies, but he also went karting with them! What was he even trying to accomplish there? The whole thing with that princess was also stupid in his opinion. If he needed to simply take over her kingdom, he could kill her and take it by force, but he was apparently in love with her. That disgusted him even more than the body he was in since this morning.

Ganondorf wasn't as bad, but he wasn't thinking big enough for the Space Pirate. In his conquests, he never tried to reach out for the stars. He was content with some pile of dirt. The thief also didn't bother getting rid of potential enemies until it was too late even after obtaining enough power to do so. There wouldn't be any resistance if he tried out one of the dragon's favourite tactics called "senseless massacre".

In turn, neither kind was fond of Ridley. Bowser was by no means a coward, but that guy creeped him out. There was no sport in his brand of villainy and he was just too violent for him. Overkill didn't even begin to describe him. Certainly not someone he'd ever want to see in his world. Ganondorf, on the other hand, saw in him and other Space Pirates mere beasts pretending to be something more than that. They simply consumed everything in sight and would continue to do so until they run out of things to kill and start attacking each other.

"Just fix this with your magic and I'll leave." Ridley demanded, unfolding his wings in an attempt to look more intimidating. With this body, he wasn't intimidating at all.

"I have no reason to help you, beast. That is final."

"I'm NOT asking! Do it or I'll tear your head off!"

"Hah, empty threats!"

"Why, you-!"

"Hey, hold on, don't leave me outta this! Who is she?" Bowser asked. He had never seen her face around here, but nobody told him anything about new arrivals.

"I'm Ridley, you lardass!"

"What? Gwa-ha-ha! Aren't you a little too small f-"

With a growl, the dragon plunged his tail into Bowser's chest, with the latter almost spitting out tea he drank earlier more out of surprise than pain. Having a tail that could stretch out so far always was convenient, especially when your enemy mostly used long-ranged weapons. The others didn't appreciate it as much as he usually stabbed them with it. Bowser hated it more than others as he was on the receiving end of it more often than others due to his much greater size and general clumsiness. Ridley was glad that he still had it even in this form.

"Say, don't you have magic too? If the old fart won't do it, then you will."

"No way I'm gonna do anything for YOU of all people!"

"Get to work now or I'm gonna tear you a new one!"

"Oh yeah? Bring it, shorty!"

"What...did you just call me?"

"Shorty!"

"THAT'S IT! I'm having turtle soup today!"

"ENOUGH!" Ganondorf shouted, slamming his hand into the table, just barely holding back to avoid breaking it. This was getting ridiculous. Bowser's booming voice and the way Ridley's voice rose in pitch as he got angrier grated on his nerves and he wanted none of it. "Take it outside or I'll put an end to this fight before it begins."

"...Tch. Worthless, the lot of you."

Meanwhile, Samus was on her way to the person who most likely knew how that crown worked. It wasn't her only option as she planned on asking Princess Zelda for help if this didn't work out, but those two were much less likely to help someone like Ridley. There was a goddess among them, but those who were drawn into this dimension to become a part of the "main cast" weren't actually at their full power. It wasn't very noticeable with people like Mario and numerous Pokemon, but the goddess in particular was greatly weakened and thus unlikely to be able to help.

Samus lightly knocked on a pink door.

"Come in!"

With permission to enter granted, she entered the room. The room in question had a pink carpet, blue wallpaper with clouds, yellow pillars, white and orange checkerboard tiles and furniture that probably costed a fortune. Princess Peach and Princess Zelda were sitting on a couch, sipping tea.

"Oh, good morning, Samus." Peach said.

"Good morning...You look awfully tired. Did you not get enough sleep this night?" Zelda asked. It was still weird seeing her so young after having spent so much time with her when she appeared more mature.

"Mornin'...No, I'm just...There's a little problem I have and I need to take care of it as soon as possible."

"What is it?"

The bounty hunter raised a bag with the crown inside and carefully revealed its contents, making sure not to touch the item to make sure she won't get affected if that's how it worked. Peach immediately recognized it, but she didn't understand what the problem was. Zelda, on the other hand, felt uneasy in its presence.

"This morning, I found this weird thing and I wanted to know what it is. I thought you might know about it since it looks like something from your world."

"Hm...Oh, it's just something Toadette uses. It just turns her into...me? It's strange, but there's nothing to worry about."

"Toadette? Did anyone else use it?"

"No, it works only on her. Please, sit down. Help yourself to some tea."

There were several more cups on the table, probably put there in case someone decides to pay a visit to them. Peach offered tea to pretty much everyone, but it was good. Few didn't accept it, but most of them simply couldn't have hot drinks or any drinks in general. Ridley was the only one who outright rejected it. Ridley - being the utter ass he was - just had to smash the cup against the ground after pretending to accept it. Needless to say, that didn't make a good first impression of him for the princess.

"Thanks...Are you sure it doesn't work on anyone?"

"Absolutely...Did something happen?"

"Well, uh, let's just ASSUME that it did work. How would that person turn back?"

"You simply take it off."

"And if that doesn't work?"

"...Samus, I'm starting to get worried. Something did happen, didn't it? If there is a problem, we can help you. Just tell us what it is. Everything will be just peachy!"

The bounty hunter really didn't want to tell anyone what the problem was. Sure, they wouldn't hesitate to help her, but Ridley really went out of his way to become the least popular person of the "main cast". But if they didn't know what was going on, then they wouldn't be able to do anything.

"Alright, I'll tell you...You know Ridley, right? Well, I have no idea how that happened, but that crown somehow ended up on his head and he...sort of...turned into a little girl?"

The silence that followed was as awkward as it could get. That was probably one of the weirdest things Samus had ever said out loud and she's been through a lot.

"...Excuse me?"

"It's exactly what it sounds like. I can show it to you, but I'd rather get him back to normal first."

"But why? Why would you help someone who...you know. He's a terrible monster and you know that better than anyone else." Zelda finally spoke up. That was exactly what Samus expected.

"I'm not doing it for that bastard. It's just that when I want to punch him in his stupid mug, I want to punch his stupid mug, not...what he has right now. He looks like a child too. It feels all sorts of wrong to me."

"I...I guess that makes sense...Something's not right with that crown though."

"Oh, what is it? It doesn't look any different from the one Toadette uses."

"I don't know what it is and it's growing fainter, but it's...ancient...and evil...It must have been cursed before."

"Like Ganondorf? Did he ever do anything like this? I know that he and Ridley don't like each other, but I haven't seen him do anything like this."

"No, it's not him. It's something completely different. I think I felt something like this before...during one of our fights..."

"Can you do anything about it?"

"I don't think so. You'll have to find the culprit and make them undo it."

"Thanks anyway, you two. I'll go find that idiot, then."

"We're always happy to help you! Come back in the evening if you have the time. I wanted to bake a cake today."

"I'll keep that in mind."

That cleared some things up, but Samus still had no solution to this problem. She would have a hard time finding whoever did this. She'd have to look for the culprit among the "supporting cast", which was basically impossible given how vast it was. Worse still, those guys rarely appeared and when they did, it was when someone from the "main cast" was in the middle of a fight. Those didn't occur every day and the battlefields they fought on were almost completely isolated from others. This meant that in order to find whoever was responsible for it, Ridley and someone like Zelda had to be there as well. It was almost impossible with those odds.

She couldn't help but groan.