I was half conscious on the floor in the burning building, the imagery around me of the place that had haunted me for fifteen years was fading from my senses, along with the acrid smell and taste of smoke that filled the room. But one thing played in my mind as if on repeat: I lied for him. And I was even glad that i did it. Most of the time, I lied out of duty or to save my own skin, but this time I had lied for him. A smile passed my lips as I thought about the irony of it all. it was in that moment, as the steady blood loss left me weaker as time went on and I was pulled away from reality, that I realized one thing more clearly than I ever could have before: I loved him. I loved Erik Heller. I loved him enough to lie for him, shoot myself in the leg in order to let him get away to die in peace. We would never be together, but I could give him an undisturbed death.
In a few moments, I coukd hear the reinforcements and assistance for which I had asked filing into the room, some were soldiers or agents with guns drawn, but others were medical personnel carrying black bags. The latter group stopped when they saw my pale, bleeding form on the floor. I didn't pay much attention to their ministrations to my wounds. The medics were calling me by my first name, having dispensed with formalities in their futile bid to keep me awake until it was safer for me to fully lose consciousness, but as the bleeding continued, I drew further away from the world of the living. Against the instructions given me in a floaty world above my head, I couldn't keep my eyes open and drifted into a world composed only of Erik's face staring at me with an expression I could only describe as love. His eyes plead with me to keep his girl alive. Wordlessly, I gave my agreement and there was peace between his soul and mine. He kissed me goodbye and that was the last image I had before falling to sleep.
When I awoke, I realized that he was gone forever. He had truly loved me but it was too late. This knowledge caused me more pain than any physical reminder of my wound.