Day 156
Shego's dress was a white A-line style, sleeveless, and with a fairly modest V-neck. The bodice of the chiffon gown was plain, but just below the level of her hip began the sparse and organic placement of small flower appliques. The appliques were in white, pink, and periwinkle, making the dress unique for a wedding.
Shego felt that white wasn't her color, symbolically or otherwise, and hoped the slight addition of pigment via the flowers would make the combination of white with her green skin and black hair look a little less strange. And to her surprise the maternity gown not only fit well but somehow even flattered her pregnant belly.
Drakken, unsurprisingly, had nothing appropriate for the occasion. Somehow it had escaped both of their notice when she ordered her dress over the Internet, so he wore his usual blue trousers but had traded the lab coat for a matching blue button-up shirt with the cuffs rolled up, and no tie. He thankfully had a pair of loafers and so avoided being married in his boots. Shego went barefoot.
There had been a brief argument about the point of dressing up at all, but Drakken had insisted. It ended after he had reminded her they would be taking pictures; someday their child might want to see memories of their wedding day.
The evening shone with a perfect golden sunset on their tiny strip of beach outside the lair. The henchmen were all gathered including those just recently recovered from the disease as the only guests for the nuptials. Officiating was Claudio, the mafia-connected opera-singing henchman, who also happened to have a license to perform marriages. He and the others had changed out of their HenchCo-standard uniforms for street clothes that Shego barely took notice of.
There were no decorations, no music, and no plans for speeches. Just Drakken and Shego surrounded by the people for whom the designation 'evil family' held a lot more meaning than it had half a year ago. The recitation of the traditional vows was nearly drowned out by the rolling of the surf, but it couldn't take away from the power of the moment.
It wasn't the words, Shego realized, though they carried a very real weight. And the fancy clothing was just for show. What mattered was the two of them, standing there with their hearts open for everyone present to see. It was the vulnerability carried within the promise they made to each other in front of witnesses.
It was a trust that Shego never thought she could find in someone other than herself. And the echoing trust in Drakken's eyes only made her more adamant about keeping the promise she was making, no matter what their lives looked like in the future. But even as fast as things kept changing, together they were finally beginning to find their direction.
Kim Possible's website had done the trick of getting the truth out about the vaccine in less than a week's time. It wasn't long after that Drakken's website began getting hits in the thousands and his email box filled to capacity, the messages widely varied in content. Some people were communicating their hate and distrust, while others were trying to get special orders of the vaccine. A great deal of the messages were from news outlets trying to get interviews with the villain who had apparently saved the world.
The latter was something neither Drakken nor Shego had anticipated, and they had taken the tack of simply ignoring all of it in hopes it would go away. There was definitely a pull for both of them toward the glory that would come with publicity, but not if it meant being paraded in front of the world and saying the same meaningless platitudes in countless carbon-copy TV spots. So to Drakken's surprise, avoiding fame rather than racing toward it became the new goal.
Alternatively, one positive side-effect of the truth coming out was the world's sudden distrust of the UN, and many countries' distrust of their own governments. Evil had genuinely not been part of their plan in delivering the vaccine, but a little chaos and anarchy along with acclaim for having saved the world was an unexpected but immensely satisfying wedding present.
Though the overwhelming response to the truth was distrust and the fame hadn't worked out exactly as Drakken had hoped, the lab security videos were undeniable proof. Kim Possible's endorsement of them was the nail in the WHO's coffin, and it slowly seemed like the world was coming around. It all worked out in the end, since Drakken and Shego had finally decided together that large-scale evil would need to take a break for at least the first several months of the baby's life. And at over twenty-two weeks, the baby was just over halfway down its path to arrival.
But in that moment, on the beach, to Shego...there were scarcely more than the two of them in the entire world.
Shego's eyes were fixed on Drakken's excited face as Claudio finished the familiar officiant's speech. She could tell it was an effort for Drakken to stand still, though his hands softly holding hers proved his devotion to the moment.
Claudio reached into his pocket and pulled out the two rings that the couple had surrendered briefly for the sake of the ceremony. Shego plucked Drakken's matte-gold ring from the henchman's palm and slid it onto the blue man's trembling finger. She grinned up at him as he let out a soft gasp of happiness. A shaky swallow followed his gasp, and Shego looked back down as he began to place her sparkling ring on her finger. He had soldered the wedding band to the engagement ring the night before, and the diamonds of the eternity ring reflected back the golden light of the setting sun.
"...And by the power vested in me, by...uh...oh yeah, by the state of New Jersey, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."
Drakken didn't move, but kept holding her hands. He was giving her knowing a look. It didn't take long for Shego to realize what it meant.
He was remembering six months ago, almost to the day, when it had all started with a kiss—a kiss of trust they had given to each other with nothing backing it, and no ground below to save them should they have fallen. But since that time they had slowly, painfully built up that trust until they had arrived at a place of surety both in themselves and each other. It was a level of trust and a place where Shego, at least, had never dreamt she could be. But this time and forever after, when they kissed she knew there would be solid ground beneath them.
They moved together, their lips softly touching in a warm caress like the rays of the setting sun. Shego could hear the cheers of the henchmen and the click of a camera shutter beyond them, but these were quickly lost as she felt her soul rise. To trust...to be one, the way she and Drakken had committed to be...was overwhelming. And though the gentle touch of his lips hadn't changed, she suddenly felt a rush like fire surge through her.
His hands abruptly left hers and his lips followed a moment later. She opened her eyes and followed his gaze down where her hands hovered green and glowing between them. She felt her cheeks color in embarrassment, but he smiled at her encouragingly. He set his hands on her waist and a moment later she smiled and put her arms up on his shoulders, holding her burning hands far back and away from his hair.
The second kiss was stronger, and she was glad for the awareness she now had of the glow because she knew it would burn hotter and brighter for the depth of love in his touch. When they finally parted, breathless, she fell against his chest as she felt the whole of her frame trembling. She was embarrassed with the entire crew of henchmen cheering and whistling their encouragement, but she was too in love to care.
"Uh...um..." Claudio said, and Shego glanced at the poor, confused man who was eyeing her hands worriedly.
Drakken cleared his throat. "Now...let's eat!"
Shego watched as the group of men, looking much cleaner-cut and more worthy of socializing with in their street clothes, made their way to the buffet table that had been laid out before the ceremony. An array of picnic foods had been prepared by Drakken and three of the other henchmen who had an affinity for cooking, and the plan was for a beach-party that went on until the last person left.
Drakken's arms embraced Shego warmly. She tore her gaze from the henchmen to look up into his happy eyes.
"You look...beautiful," he said, smiling at her as if she was the entire world.
Her response was to kiss him even more soundly than before, and she made sure to hold her hands far away as he pulled her tightly against him. Then suddenly the kiss ended as she was scooped up in a bridal carry and he started taking her away from the water's edge. She instinctively grabbed his shoulders for balance, but his small cry of pain was all it took for her to let go as her hands still glowed green. She was surprised as his still-weakened body seemed more than capable of carrying her the several yards down the beach where a large picnic blanket was spread and two chaise lounges were waiting for them.
She felt more self-conscious being essentially at his mercy and without control as he carried her, but the henchmen were all absorbed in filling their plates and not a single eye was on the couple. Before long Drakken set her back on her feet and then he sat down in one of the chaises.
"Come here," he beckoned.
"Those aren't made for two," she said, eyeing the little space that remained.
"Come here," he repeated.
Shego shook the sand from her bare feet and slowly sat next to him, and the pair of them wriggled until they both fit with a modicum of comfort into the chair, Shego half-lying across Drakken to make it work. She had been able to extinguish her hands after the shock of being carried across the beach, and so placed them on his chest while one of his arms surrounded her.
"You look beautiful," he said, smiling brightly.
She brushed a few grains of sand from his shoulder and then followed his gaze as his eyes swept up and down the length of her dress, the hem lightly blown by the breeze where it draped over the side of the chaise.
"I wore white. Happy now?"
His eyes were brimming with joy when she looked back at him, and all he managed was a nod. She leaned toward him with her lips parted and wondered if the need to move her hands was about to come again, but she froze as a cough from behind interrupted her action. Drakken lifted his eyes, and she followed his gaze to where Mitch, fully recovered from the disease, and Jameson held out two plates of food.
Mitch cleared his throat. "Um. Here's your dinner, uh...Boss."
Shego reached back and took both plates from the embarrassed pair as Drakken offered an awkward thanks. The two henchmen disappeared as quickly as they'd come, and Shego set the two plates down on the blanket next to them before turning to curl against Drakken again.
"Do you want to eat?" he asked.
"Mm, soon," she said, reaching up to stroke his jaw with the backs of her fingers. She watched the diamonds in her ring sparkle as the sun approached the horizon. The hand Drakken had around her stroked her bare arm lightly while his other hand rested protectively over her middle.
They slipped into a seemingly timeless moment, gazing into each other's eyes and deeper still into each other's souls. The silent communication of love was so strong that Shego felt she could lose herself there forever, and it would be the best beginning or ending beyond anything in her imagination.
Finally, as the vanishing of the sun began to cast shadows and a slight chill over their evening, Shego broke from their private invisible world and lay her head down on the back of the chaise and stared out at the horizon.
"Well... Now what? Mister...'saved the world and plunged it into chaos all at once'?"
"...I am quite good, aren't I," Drakken said smugly.
Shego chuckled. "Yes. You are."
Drakken shifted and Shego turned to face him. His eyes were focused and and sincere.
"We go on?" he said.
Shego glanced out at the darkening horizon and the gray bumps of the islands in the distance. She still missed her old life, whenever she was reminded of it. The world...wasn't the world they had known. It may never be again.
Drakken's fingers sliding into her hair brought her focus back to him. He was watching her patiently.
The world may have changed...but so had the both of them. And for the better.
"We go on..." she said softly, echoing the words he had been saying for months. For some reason...with the confidence of his love for her, the vague declaration didn't seem so scary anymore. She sighed and smiled. "The rest of the world...will just have to catch up."
Drakken gently pushed her hair back from her face as he shifted to lean over her. His gaze was adoring as he smiled softly down at her.
Shego heard a shout and glanced over to where some of the henchmen had started a game of ultimate Frisbee several yards down the beach. The shout had come from a man who had apparently stubbed his toe in the dying light. Some men sitting nearer on their own blankets laughed at the spectacle and glanced over toward their cuddling bosses to see if they shared in the fun.
Blushing, Shego acknowledged them with a smirk and then looked back to Drakken whose expression hadn't changed.
He mouthed an "I love you," to not be heard by the henchmen as his grin broadened.
Shego's smirk grew. "What was that? Couldn't hear you, Dr. D."
He blushed and glanced down the beach briefly before clearing his throat. "I love you," he said quietly.
She didn't push him further, but set her arms on his shoulders as he leaned in closer. He wasn't hovering so much anymore as he was half-laying on top of her.
"You were worried about the henchmen overhearing, but this doesn't bother you?" she said with a chuckle.
They were interrupted then as a firm kick within her abdomen signaled the baby's wakefulness. Drakken gasped.
"You felt that?" she asked as he looked down to where their midsections touched.
He nodded as he slid a hand down between them to feel for it again. A second kick came, and then a third. Shego was sure his smile could have outshone the stars.
"Come here," she said, pulling him down again with her arms around his back. He shifted so he was on his side next to her again, but leaned up on his elbow to look into her eyes while his other hand remained on her abdomen.
They fell into silence again as they stared at each other. Shego knew again that she could spend the rest of her life in his eyes. She moved her hand to his cheek to draw him closer to her.
"I love you, Dr. D.," she said. His eyes bright, he closed the distance between them and met her smiling lips in a kiss.
In loving memory.
A/N: In the AO3 published version of this fic, there is an embedded image here. Please, it would mean a lot...if you click over there and just take a moment to view the image. But moving on...
These notes are mostly about my personal experiences that inspired aspects of the story, so if you're not interested in that, thanks for reading and please review!
Writing this was a type of therapy for me, especially in the first few weeks. I wish I could say I'm at peace with the current circumstances, but it's only the peace of knowing that someday...we'll wake up and things will start getting better. I've had many ups and downs throughout this crisis, currently in a bit of a down as I write these notes today... But I refuse to stop looking forward to tomorrow.
If anyone is wondering the "Days" that head each section of the fic are both the days tracking the pandemic and Shego's pregnancy. Because it's fic, why not. Also, the rising death count was accurate to the days except at the end where I generalized 'over 200,000.' At the publishing of this fic, we aren't there IRL yet.
Now then — my personal experiences that inspired parts of the story:
My friends Ashley and Joey really are having to postpone their wedding.
My cousin really is a doctor with a new baby, and his family is in New Jersey. It's pretty rough for them right now.
The earthquake really happened. I was at home though, not shopping, but in the moment I did think... "Really!? Now of all times?"
I'm friends with a few cops; the rising crime/domestic terrorism is real. The headlines in my area alone are so disgusting that I've stopped reading local news. I'm thankful for those people who are trying to be positive. Sadly in my area, they seem to be outnumbered.
Nearly all of the shopping experiences were real, right down to the dialogue. The absurdly long lines at Costco, waiting in line and distancing myself from an elderly woman, bare shelves, considering stealing someone's TP (yes, really), and receiving two packages of paper towels at Costco (though, mine weren't stolen out of my cart). The gum-throwing at a cashier was real, too.
Camille's dad being missing—also real. My IRL friend Cameron's dad was in China when the whole thing started and he simply...vanished. But unlike in the story where I left it a mystery, Cameron's dad was found safe and healthy about five weeks later. That occurred over January/February.
I touched on Shego's use of distraction as a coping mechanism—that's definitely me (hellooooo giant fanfic). Drakken's obsession with finding a solution is some of my friends—not directly related to you-know-what, but throwing themselves into the the new reality rather than moping or panicking their way through.
I kept touching on the isolation/loneliness, depression, and different ways people grieve. If you'd like resources about dealing with grief, here is an article that a friend shared with me that was written very early on about the current situation: hbr. krg/2020/03/that-discomfort-youre-feeling-is-grief Copy the link, remove the space, change "k" to an "o" and you're good.
The deaths... I hope we aren't all intimately acquainted with it... But... When I started writing this fic, a retired coworker of mine was hospitalized with the disease. To make matters worse, his wife also has it but because her symptoms aren't acute she was told by the hospital to self-quarantine at home. The last time she saw and spoke to her husband was when he was taken away by ambulance... He died on April 9th. It's his picture in the AO3 version of this, if you looked at it. He inspired the part of the fic about Phil's death, and the mentions of guitar-playing at his memorial.
My coworker's wife's separation from him was what inspired the segment in the story where Shego was lost with oleander poisoning, and worrying for Drakken in the meantime while she was helpless to get back to him. It's a more fanciful correlation, I know... At the time I wrote that part of the fic, my coworker was still alive.
I killed off so many characters (including the homeless woman early on) as a way of trying to humanize the situation. Because in real life, every number in the climbing death count is somebody's loved one somewhere. No one is just a statistic. I'm on a first-name basis with a local homeless man (I buy him food sometimes; he seems happy being homeless) but I haven't seen him since early March. I'm worried about him.
Obviously...there will be no vaccine in the next month. But this fanfic had to end eventually. And I will be completely honest...this fic originally had a very, very different ending. Remember Shego's nightmare from way back at the very beginning? It wasn't a nightmare. My original plan was to kill off Drakken then and there and just end in devastation. Because that's the reality of this pandemic for many. I much, much later toyed with the idea of still having Drakken die in the end, but have the world laud him for creating the vaccine rather than deny him. I changed the ending into the tooth-rotting fluff you read because my pal Gothicthundra insisted on a happily-ever-after. You have her to blame (thank?). And I do enjoy this ending! Regardless, I had always planned to end the story with some form of melancholy hope, because there are no sunshine and rainbows at the end of a pandemic. We don't get to wake up and have everything just be okay again. We'll be clawing our way out of this for a long time.
As a Christian, one of the many scriptures I rely on is this: "Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. 'The Lord is my portion,' says my soul, 'Therefore I hope in Him!'" —Lamentations 3:22-24
That particular hope the Bible speaks of is what keeps me going. It's why 'tomorrow' can have meaning for me. I hope everyone reading this and everyone you love has a reason 'tomorrow' means something too. God bless you. Thanks for reading.