If someone said, "Teresa, one Saturday morning you will wake up with a gorgeous man who claims he's an alien knocking on your door. Oh, he also has two hearts and really does belong to an extraterrestrial species," She would have rolled her eyes and told the person that joke was stupid.

Yet, here she was, her arms wrapped around herself and hyperventilating over what she had just found out.

Aliens were real.

"You're- you're- you're,-" The raven-haired woman tried but the words were stuck on her throat no way of getting out. She was still staring, wide-eyed, the blonde man on the floor rubbing his sore nose.

"Not human?" He offered and when she nodded, he shook his head. "No. You, humans, are always so shocked when you find out you're not alone. And unnecessarily mean even though you are not old enough to be bitter."

"Not old enough?" Teresa started walking backward, unable to stay close to him any more till her back hit her living room wall beside her TV. All the things she had heard about aliens, all of them, so wrong. They were not green-grayish, with big heads, even bigger eyes, and small bodies. Apparently, they looked like human beings, were condescending, and lived much more than regular people did.

"Definitely," The Mentalist started to get up. "You think living 80 years is hard? Try having your cells regenerating into new ones when you are about to die. New body, same old person." He moved to her couch and took a place there once more.

Her voice was nothing more than a whisper when she finally gave up and slid to the floor, trembling harder than she could ever remember doing before. "How old are you?"

This had to be real life, her mind was not that creative. Her dreams were always about real-life events if she dreamed at all. Why? She asked God silently, closing her eyes trying to breathe to calm herself. Who in the world would've believed if she said she had been momentarily attracted to a 5000 years-old man with two hearts.

"Rassilon no," The Mentalist frowned. "I'm not 5000 years old. At least not yet. This is the 5th version of me and it's currently 369, but I'm 1987. And thank you, dear. Your thoughts are boosting my ego, you're a beautiful woman too."

Her eyes went wide again and she could feel her heart speeding, her breath coming out in hard puffs. "Can you stop reading me?"

It was too much.

"The Doctor always tells me humans don't like it," He mumbled more like he was talking to himself, ignoring her there. "Well, I'm sorry, Teresa."

40 minutes ago she was a happy woman, sleeping and completely unaware of the existence of aliens. And now… now there was one on her couch, looking at her like she was a fascinating creature and he couldn't wait to find out everything there was to know about her.

"Doctor who?"

He bit his lip to prevent himself from laughing, almost as if there was a joke somewhere in her question, but she didn't know where. "Another Time Lord."

Defeated and knowing he'd probably keep giving answers as if she could understand everything he said, Teresa decided to try one last time, for no word that came out of his mouth made sense at all.

"Why are you here?" She raised her head to look at him once more, starting to accept that was her life and it had changed for real.

Crossing his legs, The Mentalist looked at her, not even trying to conceal the annoyance at the repetitive question. "I have this amazing ship, we call them TARDIS and it flies me across time and space," That morning couldn't get any weirder. "The problem is, my signal was tracked by a group of people who really hate me. The Doctor was able to figure out what was going on and told me someone was looking for me. I had this feeling they'd be disguised as humans if he couldn't find out exactly who they were, but he was talking about missing Rose again and, in the end, I didn't listen to anything he said. This version of him uses his bushy eyebrows to scare people away so no one sees he's hurt. It's really annoying,-."

"Cut it, ok? You're babbling," Teresa buried her head in her hands, massaging her forehead to prevent the headache she could feel coming. "You're running. Got it. The Doctor. Another Time Lord and one who's missing a girl. Got it too. Still haven't told me why you're here."

"I was getting there when you so rudely interrupted me," The blond alien added, his tone so light and unbothered, that it made the agent want to punch his gorgeous face once more, but she kept her eyes closed and didn't give him the pleasure of seeing her expressions contorted in rage. He could probably listen to her anyway. "I truly am the cleverest man on earth. So I tracked two old companions of mine, Pete and Sam and they said two CIA agents asked them about me and showed them the picture of the old me, the one that was addicted to gambling. I was trying to get to my later companion's place, I know he lives here in Sacramento somewhere. but maybe I got Mashburn's coordinates wrong."

Her eyes shot open and she looked up at him so quickly she got dizzy. "Mashburn as in Walter Mashburn?"

"Yeah, wh-" His eyes that had been trained on her suddenly acquired a spark that told her he knew exactly how she knew Walter. Her cheeks immediately got hot and she forced herself to look away from him, who didn't move, just kept staring at her with an eyebrow raised and his lips pressed in a thin line. "Guess we can't account you for taste. Mashburn, Teresa? And here I was, thinking, hey, this sexy woman is really into me, maybe I should take her out to have dinner with me in Napa. Planet Napa, not Napa county."

"Told you to stop reading-," Teresa started to yell, but then her mind caught up to the rest of the sentence. "Are you asking me out?"

A knock on her door interrupted them before she could be sure. "I'll answer," The Mentalist said, taking off and all she could do was stand up and turn to face the door, in shock with how quick and volatile this man's mind was.

There was a second filled with tense silence in which all Teresa could think of was 'why the hell me?' But then he opened the door and she could partially see two men in black suits. The taller of them was almost bald, had a pair of dark aviator sunglasses on, and looked very elegant, but stood behind the one who was just a little taller than The Mentalist, with his dirty blonde hair neatly combed to the right.

"Good morning, Mr-?" The blonde man with curious blue eyes asked.

"Jane. Patrick Jane," The Mentalist offered.

What the fuck was that? Teresa thought, annoyed into moving. If he had started their conversation by telling her his name was Patrick Jane things would have gone so much smoother than with that Mentalist bullshit.

She stopped in between Jane and the two men, crossing her arms in front of her chest and assuming a defensive stance. Now with the Alien behind her, she could take a proper look at them. The one in front of her seemed to be about her age, but so did Jane, she thought, deciding to stick with the name instead of thinking of him as The Mentalist. He was around 6 feet tall and had this creepy air about himself she couldn't explain. The one behind him was probably 3 inches taller than him but looked more like a politician than a CIA agent, which made the CBI senior agent wary of him immediately.

"Is this going to take long? My girlfriend and I were about to head out to grab breakfast," Jane actually sounded bummed, but Teresa got stuck on the word girlfriend. What did he think he was doing?

"Girlfriend, Patrick?" She turned her head sideways, to shoot him an inquisitive brow. The only reason she used the first name he offered was that, somehow, her instincts were telling her the men in front of them were exactly who Jane said they were. Guys willing to kill them at first slip. And if her instincts had kept her alive before, then she should trust them.

"Would you rather lover, Teresa?" Jane gave her a smirk full of mischief before placing a hand on her waist and pulling her closer to nuzzle the hair just above her ear. "Please, play along." He murmured barely loud enough for her to listen over the sound of her heartbeat ringing in her ears.

Ok, she had to give in. He was handsome and if he were just a random man she met at a bar, she would probably hit on him. But he was a fucking alien and that was a life or death situation and God, what was her life even? As soon as that thought crossed her mind, the son of a bitch had the audacity of snorting, even if he attempted to hide it. His body was glued to her back and his lips were still touching her hair, of course, she would notice.

'Just stop reading my mind, ok?' She thought with all her might, knowing it wouldn't escape him, but made herself relax against his touch. "Just didn't know we were there yet."

It was hard for her to get into the game. For starters, she was not a good actress in her right mind. After all, she had found out in the last hour, her acting skills had gone to hell. Add that to the fact that her skin was getting warmer with each passing second as a result of the proximity of what her body seemed to deem as a handsome man and his hand caressing her waist through her sweater's cloth didn't help at all, and one could say her performance was lacking enthusiasm.

"Excuse me?" The politician man demanded their attention and Teresa turned back at them, but stood in Jane's arms.

"Yes, sir," Jane answered for them and Teresa was glad, for she didn't know if her voice would even come out. The scent of him and the way it surrounded her should be a crime. No one should smell like that. Sandalwood and the beach right after a storm. Mouthwatering. "How can we help you?"

God help her, she wanted to mount that man until both of his hearts stopped and he had to regenerate into a whole new being while she wore his scent around for the weeks to come.

That's vivid… She heard what felt like Jane's voice, except it was only inside her head. The agent would have jumped at the unexpected intrusion, but his hand on her waist kept her grounded and the danger of their situation kept her features schooled. Shit, not only had him seen the outrageous image her mind offered, but he also called her out on it. Was she going to sport a permanent blush for the rest of her life?

"I'm Deputy Director Bertram and this is Special Agent Haffner, we're with the CIA," They quickly showed their id's and Teresa almost felt compelled to believe them, but something was just off, as if they didn't inspire the same feeling agents of the law did. That and also the fact Jane had told her they were aliens. He hadn't lie about not being human, why would he lie about them?

"We are going around the neighborhood and asking everyone if you seen this man," Agent Haffner showed them a picture of a tall man, blonde hair slowly going gray in a short-sleeved blue button-up and khaki pants. He seemed content with a large amount of cash in his hands, oblivious to the fact someone was taking pictures of him.

"No," Jane's answer was short. Were her on the other side she would've believed him immediately, for people who weren't lying kept their answers short worded. "You darling?"

"Me neither," That technically wasn't a lie.

"Ok," Haffner sounded disappointed, but folded the picture and put it back in his jacket's pocket. "Just one more question. Have you heard a wheezing sound or anything weird around your neighborhood?"

Jane snorted openly at that and wrapped his other arm around her waist as well, fully hugging her from behind, while nuzzling her hair. "It's Sacramento, agent. We hear weird noises every time. But my girlfriend is a special agent for the CBI, if anything was out of place around here, she would have scared them away."

The worst part was that the image was appealing to her softer side. Having a boyfriend living with her, sharing a place and him being ok with her taking the lead role in the relationship. God. She was getting old.

Both agent Haffner and Director Bertram thanked them and left looking disgusted at the pair. As soon as they were out of sight Jane let her go and she felt somewhat bereft, but hey, she never liked people touching her anyway, right?

"Grab your wallet, close the door and follow me." He said stepping away from her and out of her house.

For some reason beyond her human mind, Teresa found herself doing exactly what he told her to do. Could be that she was really curious to learn more about him and the whole Space and time-traveling thing. But maybe, and that maybe was winning by a lot, it could be that she just wanted to know why he had held her that close.

"They were from a small and yet violent planet named Alwynn, Quadrant 4 of the Red John Nebula. I know them. Helped their slaves to run away. Had the displeasure of running into Director Bertram multiple times, even though I know him as commander Gale. He's one of the heads of an evil association. Blake association they call themselves. After the real William Blake, not the earth one."

Teresa's head was swimming by that point. She had followed him till they were in front of the closed doors of the out of place phone box. There was something wrong with her. This had to be a hallucination. She got shot and this was her coma induced dream state. It made sense, her mind was craving for some fantasy, something different from all the horror she got to experience in first hand.

"You're not in a coma," Jane interrupted her musings once more. This time only his head was poking through the door of the box and he had this childish grin on his lips, making him look like a boy who was about to do something really naughty. "Come on, Teresa, live a little. Get in here!"

"Here?" The agent frowned looking at the phone box. He couldn't possibly want her to get into that tiny box with him.

"I owe you a trip after I've made you so uncomfortable by seeing you in your undies, bashing into your house, stealing your computer, picking your broadcastings, forcing you to pretend to be my girlfriend and seeing the dirty things you want to do to me," He positively beamed at the final reason, making Teresa wish a hole opened on the ground and swallow her whole. "But I do have to add, I wouldn't have gotten so close if they weren't bothered by PDA. Wyanns are very strict when it comes to sexual intercourse. Only married people can engage in it and only with the male taking the female from behind. Not really made for fun."

An image of Jane stark naked, thrusting into her from behind, a hand pulling her hair and the other slapping her ass as she screamed in pleasure assaulted her mind and hell, she could see the fun in that.

"Oh for Rassilon's sake," He hissed in discomfort. "Can you please step inside the TARDIS, she'll help shield your thoughts. That was so much clearer than the last one Teresa."

With that, he disappeared inside the box and she made the split-second decision of following him inside, her own discomfort showing on her face. Anything to get him out of her mind.

But oh, if she didn't bite more than she could swallow.

Instead of a tiny box where they would both be so close, they would be forced to share the same breath, Teresa found herself in a huge room, much bigger on the inside than on the outside, with a console glowing light blue in the center of it. Above the console, she could see what could only be described as roundy plates with some sort of circular pattern engraved on it.

But none of those out of the world things were what astonished the woman the most. No, what got her was the pleasant hum in the back of her mind, as if something was trying to talk directly to her.

"HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!" Teresa screamed in shock, her eyes wide and mouth opened in a perfect 'o'. It took her a while, but it was clear as the day the ship was the one trying to talk to her. She didn't register Jane moving across the console room and laying on a brown leather couch just to the left of the console or the door closing by itself behind her.

"Go on," The blonde man's voice snapped her out of her initial stupor and forced her to look at him, all smiles on his couch. "Say it."

As the ship hummed in her head, Teresa moved towards the console and ran a hand through its smooth and cold metal surface. "Say what?"

"Come on, you know you want to." Jane made a circular motion with his right hand, signaling the size of the room. "The whole it's bigger on the inside thing. Everyone does."

"Why? It's kinda obvious,-" Teresa was going to say she wasn't stupid, but then the blonde man was standing up, jogging to her side and talking to the console.

"NO! She's not my pet." Jane flicked a knob and it hurried to life, giving her no time to ask what the hell was that. "To Napa, the planet, my dear. Yes, she's really pretty and no, you can't have her as your pet… Oh, for Rassilon's sake, Charlie. Teresa is the one who decides if she wants to stay."

Then it finally dawned on her.

"You understand her hummings," And as the blonde man hid a proud smile, Teresa faced the glowing tube of the console and muttered, "I'm not his pet, nor yours, ok? I'm no one's pet."

And at that, Jane patted the console fondly and said, "I'm definitely keeping her."