Alright, so I know that some people have read the beginning of this series before, but I thought that it needed a re-write, with new chapters and storylines ?

So please read, review and enjoy.

…

"…Clint."

"Noooooo…."

"Clint, Lucky's barking at something."

"…Not breakfast time yet."

"CLINT!"

Clint shot into a seat position, almost knocking Phil to one side as he registered the tense tone in Phil's voice. "What! What!"

Phil glared at him, "I've been shouting at you for the past ten minutes, are your hearings aids turned up?"

"I sleep deep, you know that…" Clint frowned when he heard Lucky barking near the front door, "… what's wrong with him?"

"That's what I've been trying to tell you!" Phil hissed, his voice serious and his gun already in his hands, "Something's wrong."

Clint slowly got up from the bed, grabbing his own gun from the nightstand and edging over to the front door, where Lucky was bouncing up at the door handle. It was only when he got closer, that he realised the barks didn't sound threatening, in fact they sounded more excited.

"Useless guard dog." Clint griped, using his foot to direct Lucky in another direction, away from the front door.

As soon as he opened the front door however, he heard a different sound. Glancing down at his feet, he yelped and took a step back at the sight.

Lying in a cardboard box, wrapped up in a tatty purple blanket, was a whimpering baby, tears building in green eyes.

"Shit…" Clint muttered, kneeling down and lifting the baby into his arms, glancing up and down the corridor to see if anyone was nearby.

Nothing.

"Shit, shit, shit…" He slowly closed the door, hearing the bedroom door shut as Phil entered the living room.

"Clint? What was Lucky barking- "

Clint turned around and Phil went slightly pale at the sight of the baby.

"- at?"

Knowing what Phil must be thinking, Clint started to panic. "It's not mine, I swear!" he blurted out, "I haven't slept with a woman since…. Well, Nat all those years ago." He tried to give his husband a reassuring smile, "It's not mine."

"Have you read the note?"

"Huh?"

Phil gestured down at a piece of paper that was pinned onto the purple blanket, "The note."

Carefully handing the baby over (ignoring the flush he felt on his cheeks at the sight of his husband holding the bundle), Clint removed the note and unfolded it, groaning at the sight of the familiar hand-writing.

"It's Barney."

Phil groaned as well, knowing all about Barney's reputation. "Let me guess… he knocked up a random girl and doesn't want to take responsibility for that?"

"Yeah…." Clint scanned the letter, "… that's the gist of it. Hey bro…. got into trouble…. Gorgeous women…. Things happened…. Out pops baby…. Not dad-material…. Here you go…signing over custody… Barney."

Attached to the letter, was a tattered form that already had two signatures on.

"He's already signed the kid over…" Clint exclaimed in shock, "… Signed the kid over and then dumped him in on our doorstep."

Phil winced in sympathy, gently rocking the baby as it started to whine slightly, "Does… does he have a name?"

Scanning over the official-looking documents, Clint quickly found the name. "Ian… Ian Barton."

Knowing that his husband still seemed to be in shock, Phil gently led the other man to the sofa (shooing Lucky away) and placing Ian back into Clint's arms. Clint almost unconsciously started to rock the baby, staring at the wall in shock.

With the baby slightly calmer, Phil made his way back into the bedroom, grabbing his phone and giving Nick a ring.

"Director…" he sighed, "… we have a situation."

…

"Are you sure Nick can even deal with this?" Clint asked as they strode through the corridors of SHIELD headquarters, "I didn't think illegal adoption was part of SHIELD's manifesto!"

"It's not…. But Nick owes me a favour and Barney signing over his paternal rights just isn't going to cut it. We need an official lawyer to oversee this."

"Wait…" Clint stopped in the middle of the hallway, "… You really want to keep him?"

Phil frowned, "Did you honestly think I would just dump him in an orphanage?"

"Well… we haven't exactly talked about children and- "

"- And we've been married for five years." Phil smirked, "Most couple would have at least two kids by now."

As the baby started to cry once again, Clint winced, "I don't think I could handle two."

As they walked through the corridors, they caught the attention of several agents, all of them turning to stare after the pair and the sobbing baby.

It wasn't unexpected that Natasha quickly appeared out of nowhere and blocked their path.

"I thought Sitwell was bullshitting me…" she admitted, staring at the baby, "… I must say Clint, you hid that well."

"Oh, ha ha. If you must know, my dumbass brother dumped him on my doorstep this morning, signing over his parental rights to me…. Wanna hold him?"

Before Natasha could say anything (including the likely curse words that were threatening to come out at the mention of Barney), Clint handed the baby over, making sure that her arms were holding the baby securely.

All went quiet.

"Oh of course the baby likes her…" Clint grumbled good-naturedly, "... he cries in his Uncle's arms, but not in the arms of a complete stranger?"

Natasha stuck her tongue out at him, bouncing the baby up and down in her arms before handing him back to Clint.

Thankfully, the baby remained silent.

"Come on Clint…" Phil sighed fondly, "… We need to see Nick."

….

"I can't fucking believe this…"

Clint winced at the tone of Nick's voice, even as his husband barely flinched, watching as Nick paced his office.

"… I let you two hook up and marry each other because you were professionals and there was no choice of pro-creation!" Nick gestured angrily at the baby, who was watching the whole scene with bemusement, "Look at that!"

Clint glanced down at the baby, "Well… technically he's my brothers'."

"And that's meant to make me feel better?!"

"No Sir."

Nick paced for a few more minutes, before spinning around and pointing a finger at Clint, "And he signed custody over to you?!"

"Yeah… I'm as shocked as you."

"And he just disappeared?!"

"Barney's good at that."

"And there's no chance of you just handing the kid over to an orphanage? Those lawyers' Stark likes will probably take him! They're looking into that!"

Here, Clint and Phil glanced at one another, silently communicating as to what to tell Nick.

Judging by the weary sigh, Nick already knew what they were going to say.

"You're keeping him."

"Yes Sir." This time, it was Phil who answered, "But Barney's method isn't entirely legal and- "

"- and you want me to but a few heads together and make it legal for you." Nick groaned, "Have I mentioned how much I detest your brother Barton?"

"Probably not as much as I do Sir."

There were a few tense moments of silence, before Nick waved his hand. "Fine. Leave the paperwork with me and I'll get the legal team on it, now…" he gave the pair a fond look, "… now, I think you two had better get some baby supplies. SHIELD isn't paying for that."

"Well technically- "

"- don't you 'technically' me Phil."