Outpouring
"Your Highness. Where are you going?"
Dimitri stopped at the sound of Dedue's voice behind him, though he did not reply at first. For a few seconds, there was nothing but the sound of the rain splattering around them. A few horses whinnied softly in the stables. The pause seemed to stretch endlessly.
"There is only one place I must go, Dedue," he finally replied. "You know where. There is only one thing that will make all of this worth it."
Dimitri couldn't keep the edge out of his voice, and he knew it was too much to ask that Dedue wouldn't pick up on his meaning.
"Alone?" Dedue pressed. "If nothing else, please allow me to come with you."
"No, Dedue." Dimitri's eye flashed, and he spoke louder than intended. "I must go alone. I can't allow you to follow me."
"And why not? What purpose does this serve?"
Dimitri stepped backwards, hands instinctively reaching for one of the stable doors for support. Dedue stepped forward, clearly undeterred. He clearly knew what Dimitri's intentions were.
"You don't understand. This is the only thing that will make all this worth it! The only thing that will let my father and stepmother and e-even Rodrigue rest easy!"
Dimitri's voice shook as Dedue slowly closed the gap between them. He sighed, glanced away, and looked back at Dimitri with the most haunting expression he'd ever seen on Dedue's face.
"You are throwing yourself away, Your Highness. And if your life is thrown away, what does that mean for me?"
"I... I..." Dimitri swallowed. "This is why you must not come along. You are worthy of living, Dedue. More than I am. I can't let you do this after having saved you, you understand?"
"Your Highness..." Dedue's hands were on his shoulders now. "What does saving me matter when you are taking away the one thing that has kept me going these past nine years? Without you by my side, that is all meaningless. What shall I do then?"
"I told you I want you to live," Dimitri replied desperately. "Because you must have some reason besides me to do it. Surely..."
Surely what, Dimitri wondered. Dedue had kept Dimitri living during the four years after they'd met. He'd been Dimitri's main reason for living then. It hit him then that he knew what Dedue meant, but he desperately tried to stuff that feeling down.
Dimitri was little more than a bloodstained monster at this point. Dedue had so much more to live for than he did. Why couldn't he see that?
"But you do understand, then, what I am trying to tell you, Your Highness."
"What are you saying?" Dimitri replied desperately. "If you know what I must do, please tell me! I... What should I do? What is the point of living if I can't even help those who need it most? How do I make it all stop?"
"Live for yourself, as you want me to do. Your kingdom needs you. Duscur needs you, as you are the only one who can change your kingdom for us. Your friends need you. And... I need you, Dimitri."
Dedue's voice was barely over a whisper at this point, and his hand had come to rest on the side of Dimitri's face. His eye widened as he shakily rested his hand on top of Dedue's. His name. Dedue had not once used his name in over five years.
Now, the way he said it, voice weak but somehow gentle, made it clear what he meant.
And he was right on all other counts. Dimitri knew it, deep down. He'd always known all of those things. But Dimitri hadn't let himself believe it, not in many years.
His knees shook. Dimitri lurched forward, arms wrapping around Dedue, cheek resting against the wet plates of his armor. How much of it was rain and how much was tears, he couldn't say.
"You're right, Dedue. I still have much to live for." He shuddered. "Will you stay with me then, until the end? Stay with me here, with everyone else. And don't let me stray again."
"I have wanted nothing more for years... Dimitri."
Dedue pressed his lips to Dimitri's forehead as the rain still fell around them, and Dimitri wondered how he'd never realized exactly what he'd had by his side this whole time.