Welcome back to chapter 16. And the Akatsuki is heeeeeeeeeeeeeeerreeeeeee. :D But not really because prepare for sadness .

Thanks to all of my followers, favoriters, reviewers and readers! You complete me *ugly sobbing*

Thoughts are in italics

Gaara's thoughts reaching Miyako are italics and underlined

Memories/flashbacks are in bold italics

Bold if not for emphasis, is for my beginning/endnotes.

Disclaimer: I'd actually be interested to know what Kishimoto would take in exchange for the Naruto series *thinking emoji*

Promises are made to be Broken

The next year could be mistaken as peace. Miyako tricked herself into believing it was—there were little to no attacks on Gaara after Fugi's failed attempt, the dissenters had swiftly disbanded as growing admiration for the Fifth Kazekage surmounted; Sand was starting to see prosperity under Gaara's rule that they had never seen before.

Things were rapidly looking up, so much so that the normally stoic Kazekage could be seen with the corners of his mouth twitched up on more than one occasion. A feat that had men trembling in confusion and women swooning into faints. He seemed, additionally, to be even giddier at the murmurs being brought to him from Konoha.

"Your friend is due home anytime now." Raccoon closed off her report with this little reminder only to see Gaara's face split from ear to ear, though only momentarily—he did have an image to uphold.

"Excellent." He righted himself in his chair after giving a too-large grin. "We may have to…arrange something." He looked at her beneath his eyelashes coyly as she poured him a fresh cup of tea, and she gulped away her rapidly gutter-driven thoughts and nodded stiffly.

"I have no doubt that we could arrange to be in Konoha…early for the Chuunin exams." She murmured conspiratorially.

Yes, once again the Chuunin exams were right around the corner, and while the memory of the last exams were still fresh in Raccoon's mind, it had been a good year and the Sand had produced even more new recruits to participate this time around, having bowed out gracefully the time before due to their still slower production in Academy graduations.

Gaara grunted in agreement, but swiftly moved on. "You have the documents for me to review in this upcoming meeting with the Jounin Council?"

Raccoon nodded and pulled from a considerable stack of papers a small manila folder containing coded information. She hadn't reviewed it, she wasn't privy to such things, but Gaara hadn't felt the need to keep things hush—at least around her.

The bleak spot on this past near perfect year was the looming threat of the Akatsuki. Jiraiya, the Sannin Spy of Konoha, had been gathering intelligence from his informants that painted a pretty grim picture for the coming year. The Akatsuki were making moves to begin collecting tailed beasts—with several sightings of their infamous black and red cloaks haunting the streets, the upcoming meeting was to be a discussion on the protective measures needed for Sand to protect their Kazekage. Or, as the Council saw it, their asset.

Raccoon had no doubt that they would attempt to confine Gaara even further, and even increase his security detail—something they could now afford to do since having doubled their ANBU recruits. They would also likely tighten security around the border and may even enforce a curfew until the Akatsuki could be dealt with.

It had been discussed, several times amongst the now ten ANBU captains, which now included Lynx and Nightingale, and the Council if they should investigate the Akatsuki themselves. The idea was shot down each time however, the Sand still lacking enough military personnel to risk actively hunting the Akatsuki and have enough detail to spare for the village's protection.

While this one worry was a singular cloud in the Council's mostly blue skies, Raccoon's was filled thunderclouds fat with rain and only waiting to burst with the right conditions. Gaara's safety lied chiefly amongst them, the largest fattest cloud in the center, and circling around it, feeding and building it, was her self-inflicted weakness. One would think with a whole year Raccoon could've found the courage and the time to attempt once again to tell Gaara the truth, but you would be underestimating the sheer level of cowardice and fear that weighed down her heart with every scenario she spun in her head.

It didn't help that when the information came in that the Akatsuki would be making their moves in the near future a year ago, the Council had jumped on this bandwagon of believing that Miyako wasn't working for Orochimaru, but for the Akatsuki. Just trying to wrap her cotton-filled brain around the idea of explaining she wasn't gave her a debilitating migraine. But these were all excuses in the end, and the few times she managed to go back "home" to her abandoned building, blood would decorate her sink each time. The coughing fits were getting worse, the fatigue was so bad that she couldn't even sleep for more than a few hours a night lest her body force her into a hibernation state to recoup lost energy, if anyone could see her skin they'd think she was a ghost she was damn near translucent. She feared if she didn't tell Gaara any time soon, that when the Akatsuki did attack she'd be no more help than a pre-genin.

"It says here that they've confirmed 2 deaths of Jinchuriki—" he paused and squeezed his eyes shut momentarily, forcing himself to breath evenly before continuing, "one of them being Fuu, of Waterfall."

Raccoon choked on her tongue, the only giveaway to her surprise in her body language being the slight tremor in her hands frozen in midair.

'Fuu…is dead.' In her mind the blue haired girl's sunny smile flashed, and the Jack-in-the-box was out of tune, the song eerily playing over and over, but no Jack ever appearing. 'I…have to tell him. Right now. I can't have even the slightest possibility of him dying be feasible.'

Raccoon heard the lock click and blinked to find herself in front of Gaara's door, not conscious of having moved to it. She slowly pulled her hands away as Gaara called her name, the edge in his voice bringing her to swing around to stare at him.

"I…" She gulped, a thousand scenarios buzzing around in her brain as Gaara slowly stood from his desk, eyeing her in concern and still with that edge—alarmed. She had to say something quickly.

"I have to tell you something." Raccoon forced out through the thickness in her throat. The image of Gaara's rare smiles burning out along with his sparkler against the setting sun, plunging her whole entire world into darkness, no, no, she couldn't let that happen.

"Why did you lock the door?" His gaze was sharp, but not entirely distrusting as the ANBU shakily made her way to stand before his desk again.

'Should I just take off the mask, lift the glamour? But what if he immediately sends a distress signal? But how am I supposed to prove who I am without doing so? What can I say to him that won't set him off into alerting others? I don't have magic to sustain a larger spell at this point.'

"It's sensitive." She started off softly, fingers unconsciously coming to knot themselves in front of her stomach, twisting and twisting like the confines of her mind. He drifted his eyes down to her nervous fidgeting, his eyes narrowing at this uncommon behavior from his normally straightforward Right Hand.

"Why do you hesitate?" He urged, trying to relax his stance and keep his face flat. He moved his arms to be braced behind himself, hiding his own nerves and thoughts in order to get her to open up. He told himself not to jump to conclusions, even though the longer he had to wait the more worried he became.

"I need you to believe me." A look of surprise overcame his features at the desperate rip of her voice between them, her fingers clenching so hard they shook from the strain.

His own fingers twitched behind him to reach out for her in comfort—an odd sensation. Out of the two of them, Raccoon was much more skilled in this area, having comforted him many times throughout the last year. He was sure he wouldn't know what to do even if he did gather her in his arms. So he held himself back, reminding himself sternly that this was inappropriate anyway.

He nodded for her to go on and her inhale was so shaky he had to resist the urge to surge forward to attempt to comfort once again.

"It's about my identity." She let out a humorless laugh at his confused frown, knowing he was thinking that he already knew "Ai".

"It's about who I am to you, who I've always been to you. Our…past." She trailed off, knowing she was stalling, but honestly, she was flying by the seat of her pants with this. Every plan had been tossed out the window now that she was before him and trying to fight her own fears. Faced with the wide eyed confusion that reminded her so strongly of the child she met all those years ago, she forced her lips open despite her shaking.

"I-"

A sharp knock might as well have been a rumble of thunder, it jolted them out of the atmosphere that quickly.

"Kazekage-sama?" Was called from outside by what was unmistakably their normal Chuunin runner.

"One moment." Gaara called out gruffly, still looking at her with furrowed brows, something in his eyes urging her to go on.

She might've been able to push past the momentary distraction, but the Chuunin persisted outside the door. "Kazekage-sama, the Council meeting begins in only a few minutes, and Kankuro-san has requested to see you shortly beforehand."

Gaara frowned over Raccoon's shoulder at the door but the ANBU strode to unlock it anyway. She heard his heavy sigh as the lock came undone.

"Raccoon?" He insisted, and when she turned back to survey him he looked more serious than she'd ever seen him.

"We will continue this conversation when I return." He wouldn't move until she gave a stiff nod in reply. Gathering up his papers, he proceeded past her, his hand only hesitating momentarily before reaching up and giving hers a squeeze, detaching just as quickly as it came.

Raccoon breathed in and out slowly as the door clicked shut behind her, her rapid heartbeat slowing to an even pace. This was good, she tried to tell herself, now she had more time to get her thoughts in order. She had more time to do what she did best, plan. Ignoring that she'd planned a thousand different ways to tell Gaara before.

This time it would be different, it had to be. Gaara would come back from his Council meeting and then she would just tell him, consequences be damned. The risks were far more deadly.

It was too bad she never got the chance.

G/M

"Don't do this, you promised!" She screamed at the back of Gaara's head, or at least what she thinks is the back of Gaara's head, she was seeing three in front of her currently.

"Raccoon, initiate the evacuation protocols and ensure everyone is taken to safety—and then check to ensure he came with no accomplices." Gaara, no, the Kazekage ordered.

Raccoon thought for a moment of defying him—Gaara, the master of Miyako the genie was more important than Gaara, the Kazekage of Suna and leader over his troops, including his Right Hand. But she knew that if she attempted to intervene right now and didn't get the villagers to safety he'd feel the need to not only protect everyone else, but also her, which she would no doubt need in the condition she was in.

As predicted she was no in shape to take on an S-ranked criminal, and even though every instinct screamed at her, she turned and hopped off the building and onto the sandy ground, but not without promising to come back to aid him.

She found a nearby Jounin gaping up at the Akatsuki on a white bird, detonating clay as Raccoon had already witnessed, villagers around him doing the same while murmuring worriedly to themselves and others.

She vaguely recognized the Jounin after blinking multiple images of him away from her eyes. "Mino-san." She called in a grunt.

The man snapped to attention to find the ANBU Captain at this side. "Y-yes?"

"We are initiating Evacuation Protocol 5, you are in charge of filing the villagers in an orderly fashion in sectors C1 through 3 and to stay with them until you are given the signal to either aid or return to safety. Do you know your signals?" When the man frantically nodded she sprinted off to find other Jounin to assign to the rest of the village, cursing that they couldn't send up their usual flares in fear that they'd draw attention to the fleeing villagers. The Akatsuki didn't look above killing innocents to get to their objective.

She pushed herself despite knowing she'd pay for it later, eager to get back to Gaara before this blond Ino look-alike could do any worse than he'd already done. By the time all the villagers were filing into the bunkers underneath the village, Gaara had managed to crush the blonde's arm with his sand, though the lack of reaction didn't make her feel any better about their chances.

Only a few remaining stragglers were left, majority of them being Chuunin and Jounin leftover that hadn't been assigned any tasks. Raccoon barked orders at them left and right, her countenance, despite being hidden behind a mask, must've been scary enough to have them skittering off with barely concealed looks of fright. There was no way she was ever going to tell them that she could barely hurt a fly right now.

A lance of panic shot through her that wasn't her own and she snapped her neck up to find a large white object dropping rapidly towards them. The few villagers that were waiting to file inside froze in panic, shouting exclamations of fight as the inevitable bomb loomed ever closer.

"Don't stop!" She screamed, crowding the nearest inhabitants into the building they lingered outside of. "Do not stop, do not stare, get yourselves to safety!" She crowed, her body working double time on auto-pilot to pull a mother and her daughter into another establishment in the Bazaar, tipping over tables to access a hidden wine-cellar beneath the floor boards.

"Your Kazekage does not need you gaping at him as he defends you, he needs you to keep yourselves safe so he can keep our home safe!" She snapped, wondering if she would have to put up an extra light shield around the Sand dome encasing them, giving herself away be damned.

The explosion shook the sand, causing grains to trickle down on them in the dark like rain. Raccoon grasped the nearest presence to herself she could find in the pitch dark.

"Send off a flare while we are under this cover from the enemy to gather the supplies from each of the checkpoints."

"Yes, Raccoon-san!"

Raccoon's eyes adjusted to the dark and her ears tuned out the fervent cries of worry and whispers around her for Gaara, her own heartbeat ricocheting around her chest enough to drown out all others. The orders from Gaara were still echoing in her ears, but with sand encompassing them from all sides, her willingness to find any accomplices had hit zero. It wasn't that she didn't believe he could win here—she knew what Gaara was capable of. The problem was if Gaara would do what needed to be done—would let himself go that far to escape death.

Raccoon was well aware of the self-loathing that plagued Gaara, despite the fact that it was only the size of a pea and rested deep below several layers of sand that made up his own inner desert. He didn't have to say, hell she didn't even have to "feel" it even though she could, it shown through in the way he threw himself into the arms of danger without thought. Sure, plenty could argue that it was brave, that he was simply trying to put his power to good use—that he was trying to spare others. Selfless. Strong. That excuse would've been believable if Gaara hadn't learned years ago that he wasn't invincible. Lee had hit him when he'd previously never been before. Sasuke had made him bleed. Naruto had nearly knocked him out, hell she'd even proven that his sand wasn't infallible.

And the argument that none of those people, well aside from Sasuke and as far as they believed Miyako, would likely injure him again, still wasn't valid. Kimimaro had been centimeters away from skewering Gaara's eye out. Seimei had nearly depleted him of all Chakra. Fugi's plot had been halfway to success by the time Neji and the others showed up. That last reminder was even more proof that Gaara could not and should not do this alone. Yet he'd pushed them all away to face an unknown and it tore at Raccoon.

Suddenly the thought that Gaara would be taken from her after she'd done nothing at all drove her into a mad frenzy. At the edges of her consciousness she could feel the Shukaku chakra struggling and licking at Gaara's confines, it latched onto her through the bond and everything hazed over into a red she could hardly control.

K/T

Objects on the desk tipped over from the sheer force of the fist slamming onto it, the Chuunin reporting to the blonde-haired woman quivering where they stood. The only things left untouched were a raccoon mask missing a jagged chunk out of the bottom edge and splattered with blood on the inside, and a puppet arm, fist still closed to attack.

"How the hell could this have happened?!" She thundered, eyes narrowing onto the unfortunate subjects of her misplaced anger, the Chuunin refusing to meet her gaze.

"Temari-san, w-we followed Raccoon-san's instructions after the Kazekage shielded us from the bomb, but-" The Chuunin gulped as the woman mashed her teeth threateningly.

"Maa Temari-san." She unwound imperceptibly as the Copy-nin Kakashi patted her shoulder softly. "Please continue." The Jounin urged with a forced friendly demeanor.

"K-kankuro-san pursued the bomber immediately upon noticing he'd taken Kazekage-sama."

Temari snorted, rubbing her temples at her brother's hotheaded nature. She swore that when she got both her brothers up and running again she was going to beat them within an inch of their lives.

"And what of Raccoon?" She snapped when they let the silence linger for a little too long.

"W-we still haven't located her, it's possible that she may be…" The Chuunin trailed off and bit his lip, the possibilities of where the ANBU could be endless.

Temari briefly froze, a memory tickling at her of years ago—when that odd looking God had tried to extract Gaara's Shukaku chakra. He'd seemed oddly fixated on the ANBU as well, was it possible that both Gaara and Raccoon had been kidnapped?

"You're saying no one saw where she went? No one can confirm her movements before she went missing?"

The Chuunin scratched his head nervously. "Hideki said she told him to collect supplies, but had gone by the time he returned. He assumed it was to help the other squadrons or the Kazekage, but then we found her mask near the entrance…"

Temari sighed and dismissed the men with a flick of her hand, after scurrying out of the room, she and Kakashi were the only ones remaining.

"What the hell happened?" Temari groaned into her hands, glaring at the two objects in the center of the table, as if somehow she'd be able to see into the past and piece together how everything went wrong so quickly.

"This isn't much comfort," Kakashi started, making the note of hesitance obvious in his voice, "but the likelihood that Raccoon was taken is low—she would've followed protocol before allowing that to happen." He let it linger between them, Temari hiding her horror at the alternative that Raccoon had killed herself instead of risk being taken and then having the Sand's secrets discovered fairly well, although it made her shake at just not knowing.

"I'm sure she has to either still be in the village or pursuing them herself." He didn't sound so sure on either option and Temari pushed herself out of her chair, taking heavy steps out of her brother's office and to the door.

There was no way that if Raccoon was pursuing them she would've left her mask behind, or that if she had been pursuing them the same time as Kankuro that she wouldn't have attempted to aid him. The possibility that she was dead was looking more and more likely with every puzzle piece uncovered, but they wouldn't know for sure until she was found—a body, breathing or not.

K/T

"Raccoon is missing?!"

Kakashi raked his eye over the siblings, noting that Kankuro reacted as if someone had said Gaara and Temari had been taken instead of Gaara and an ANBU. He wanted to be disapproving of how attached they seemed to be to someone that was essentially supposed to be expendable, but he couldn't help the morbid sense of pride he was harboring since he'd met Raccoon—glad that she wasn't as alone as so many other comrades he'd seen.

"The ANBU isn't our priority."

Kakashi swung his eye over to the eldest in the room, the lilac haired Elder who'd attempted to gut him just because she'd thought he was his father. Although Naruto had managed to, to no one's surprise, convince her that sending a search party after the Kazekage wasn't foolhardy, that didn't change her opinion of Shinobi expendability. And in this instance, Kakashi had to agree with her. He wasn't too fond of it, but when he'd told Temari the options, he'd been leaning towards believing she was dead.

"So I'm assuming your reaction means that she wasn't pursuing them." Kankuro's clenched fist was all the answer they needed. Still, Kakashi took pity, knowing that they'd have to delay taking action until Pakkun returned, he was tempted to have one of the others track Raccoon, just for confirmation.

Kankuro reached out one hand to the chipped raccoon mask lying on his bedside, hand clenching in mid-air above it before he could disturb it. He wanted badly for it to be taken away so he wouldn't have to be reminded of how he'd failed. But he couldn't stop looking into those dark cutouts, scenarios of what could've happened dancing in his head.

G/M

'Monster…you're a monster.' Dark, crazed laughter rang in her head, it definitely wasn't her own but she felt the Shukaku's desperation for control so potently that she didn't even stop him from using her body like a puppet as she narrowly avoided Sasori's tail. 'monster—MONSTER. Just like us.'

How did she know it was Sasori…? Someone had said it, she was forgetting something. Forgetting… 'Kill him for us…KILL HIM.'

Something collided with her moon sickle she hadn't even remembered putting up to guard with. Remember, who's that? Why would she need to remember, he was in her way, he had to—had to

"I'll handle her." She saw the dark-haired man before her gripping a kunai. He favored the right side, a weakness she'd caused. She can't remember how, having relinquished control when she'd reached the border wall and seen him, Sasori, in his wooden armor. 'Coward, hiding, KILL HIM.'

Truly having her analytical mind paired with Shukaku's madness was terrifying. She would be scared later.

She blinked, looking down at the metal tail extending into her abdomen in confusion. Her body followed as it yanked out of her all of the sudden. A body was in her vision, Yura's, gutted in a strange pattern from shoulder to hip she observed, red washing the ground beneath him. She vaguely realized she did that. Was that all she did? No. 'Because you're a monster, and not even a good one. The worst kind.' He growled in her head as she looked back to observe the blobs in her vision. The large white one with a red and black and yellow hat had red in it's grasp—her red.

Her arm extended, blinding purple light enveloping her hand and she marveled at it with a sort of detachment that only came the rare times she wasn't in control of her body. She almost thought this power was beautiful, if only it hadn't ruined her life.

Shukaku was good at dodging even when they had a gaping hole in their stomach. The tail glinted in the low lighting of the moon as the energy released from her hand, enveloping the white thing holding her red before it could dodge.

This time they didn't dodge quick enough, and the red slipped away from her as the tail caught the side of her face and chin, the crack of porcelain creating a symphony with arguing voices, the creaking of the wooden armor puppet's tail and the flaps of wings and drag of sand underneath a heavy body.

If she screamed she didn't remember, she didn't think she had the voice for it anyway as she slowly started to lose consciousness, hand clawing in the direction they left until there weren't any more shapes to claw after. Her cheeks were wet, the ground was cold and her sobs were quiet.

K/T

Kankuro forced himself out of bed to follow Bisuke, Kakashi's youngest nin-dog that he'd lent them to locate Raccoon, with the excuse that he was "just getting some exercise" despite the glares the medic-nin gave him for being out of bed.

Bisuke, as the youngest, had the least amount of tracking experience and, admittedly, didn't have nearly the tracking skills Pakkun had. But a nin-dog was better than none, or it would be if Raccoon's scent wasn't stamped all over Suna. He'd thought they were making headway when Bisuke couldn't pick up a trail outside of Suna, which meant she was either dead or still somewhere in the village, but since they'd come back from the gate they had only picked up lingering traces of her scent.

Kankuro had gotten slightly excited when Bisuke had picked up a scent, which wasn't good for his injuries as Ameno had sassily pointed out, and they'd had to run at a slower pace, but they eventually were drawn to an abandoned building on the outskirts of Suna. With some hesitance they'd followed the excited ninken down a hole-ridden hallway until they made it to the other side of the building and to a door that the dog was yipping at.

Kankuro observed the caked dust on every surface and swirling in the air as Ameno swiped at the dust motes in the air and what looked like one of a small colony of spiders that lived and bred in a hole in the wall. The floorboards that weren't busted were creaking terribly under their weight and Kankuro was pretty sure there was mold growing in several places. All in all no normal human could even hope to inhabit this abandoned complex without major renovation, so why was Raccoon's scent here?

Ameno cautiously stepped to open the door, which looked marginally cleaner than the rest of the space, after deeming it was safe, with a nod to Kankuro, they burst into the room.

A burst of cool air met them despite the clear lack of working central heating and cooling systems in the rest of the building, the lights, it seemed, also worked in this one lone room as someone had left the vanity light on across the room.

Kankuro whipped behind him to check if they were still in the same building, verifying that, yes, everything still appeared broken down and dilapidated. To be sure, he tried to "release" believing for sure one or the other had to be Genjutsu, but balking when nothing happened.

Ameno had stepped inside to investigate with Bisuke who was nosing everything. The mattress in the middle of the floor before quickly flitting to the vanity and then to a ledge where a cactus sat in one of Suna's master craftsman's pots.

"Why would an ANBU live here?" Ameno murmured, pushing her long russet hair behind her ear. She began checking cupboards and other things for clues, but aside from the neatly made up bed and the potted plant there wasn't anything in plain sight to give them any clues.

"You're sure Raccoon was recently here?" He shot the dog an incredulous look as he made his way to the closet, only to open it and find nothing.

"She was puppeteer!" Bisuke sniffed haughtily. "The scent isn't that old." He sniffed around the bed again. "Less than a week tops." He nodded self-assuredly.

It didn't make any sense to Kankuro; didn't add up. Sure Suna didn't pay their shinobi lavishly, but the pay was decent enough for a comfortable living. And Raccoon was the Right Hand, she could live in the mansion if she so desired, she was there nearly 24/7 anyway.

"There's hardly any food here." Ameno called from the small kitchen separated by only a wall, she stepped out into the open space again to regard Kankuro who had looked in the closet for clues but only found more ANBU uniforms and nothing else. "Living" here seemed to be a stretch—a lack of food and no clothing to indicate anything outside of her shinobi life. Was she perhaps hiding something here? He narrowed his eyes, feeling along all of the walls of the common area while Ameno went to check the bathroom, murmuring about it being filled with only hair products and other miscellaneous toiletries.

"I know Kazekage's really don't get to have a social life outside of their station, but I didn't realize Right Hands didn't either." Ameno shook her head at Kankuro's hopeful look and he deflated, having found nothing in the way of personal artefacts or clues as to why she was living here.

No wards, no personal items, and the strangeness of it all—how did the cooling system manage to cool this one room and how did the lights work when the rest of the building wasn't wired for electricity? Why was she so far away from the Kazekage mansion when she worked so closely with them? Kankuro felt uneasiness brew in his stomach as he scanned the bare surroundings once more.

"Well, the lack of recent activity means she hasn't been here so the…mystery of her living arrangements will have to be solved some other time." He squared himself up and stepped out of the room, Ameno following with a twin pensive look on her face, Bisuke scurrying behind them.

"We'll just have to keep looking."

G/M

Miyako could count on one hand the times she had felt close to death. There was a certain detachment to life she had managed to perfect after all these years having really only herself as company. So maybe she'd been dead this whole time, inside anyway. Or maybe outside too? There was a theory somewhere that this was all one giant and elaborate inescapable Genjutsu.

As she watched her hand, the only tether to reality she had at the moment; what she'd chosen to focus on while pain unimaginable was surging through her, she decided to use the fingers to count the times.

The first, she paused to choke on her own blood as she folded her pointer finger, was when her second master's skin nearly melted off after he wished for her magic for himself. The image was actually pretty gruesome, it looked like a star was going supernova inside of his skin, and though she'd managed to save him in time, the boils he'd developed and the wider openings in his skin where the magic had tried to escape were permanent. That particularly brush with death had felt like hot iron rods were piercing through every nerve ending and scraping against her cells. This was how she found out she couldn't allow her masters to die.

The second, she folded her middle finger, silently screaming and balling tightly into the fetal position at the wrack of pain that shook her whole body at the movement. Was with her fourth master, in the middle of the first war of the emerging shinobi world. An Uchiha had tried to burn him to cinders in an ambush after he had exhausted his chakra. She remembers the phantom licking of flames on her right side and how too satisfied she'd felt when she'd made the offending Uchiha's head explode in a mess of brain matter and blood. Despite sustaining 4th degree burns on the entire right side of his body, he lived with no lingering pain.

Her hand shook and the scenery changed. "No, no, no more." She wailed, trying desperately to keep her bronzed feminine hand in her focus, surrounded by the darkness of the inside of her lamp. Yes, she was in a lamp and this was her hand. They were bigger than average for a woman, her hands, it must've been because she was above average in height, but they were really made up of all long fingers, slender. The hands of a princess her red-headed lover used to say.

She jolted when the image of a larger hand, paler hand surrounded by white superimposed itself onto her vision. "No, no, no." She begged, forcing her eyes closed, but the image was burned onto her eyelids, just like the voice was imprinted into her head.

'What is this?'She'd never heard his voice sound as forlorn as it was now. 'Oh, this is my hand.'

She bit her own teeth and fingernails into the flesh of her lip and palm, scrambling to do anything to get away from the overwhelming tsunami of emotions amplifying their pain. But the image persisted, Gaara's loneliness persisted as he looked out into the white expanse of space, empty space. They were battered with the sense of how this emptiness reflected their own lives. Miyako was lying in the dark suffering and no one the wiser, and Gaara was looking into the light of the afterlife, still so very unfulfilled, his hand still very much empty.

They reached, both simultaneously, out in front of them for relief.

'No one's here.'

Her teeth separated from her lip, blood slid down her chin as she forced herself to say the words he'd never hear. "I'm here. I'm sorry." 'For a thousand things.'

K/T

After following several dead trails along the village, Bisuke was now sniffing around the Kage mansion, though at this point they weren't hoping for much. Ameno had forced Kankuro back into the bed after arriving back, citing that she didn't want Temari to have any more of a reason to be worried.

"Kankuro-san?" He forced his gaze, which had been unseeing on the ceiling, to her concerned frown.

"She'd have wanted you to spend your time finding Gaara." He shut his eyes and turned away, knowing it was true, but not liking the confirmation. He didn't want to think about a world in which Gaara returned to one less person in the world who truly cared about him. He didn't dare dwell on how he felt about the ANBU, so instead he scoffed and opened his eyes, croaking out through a thick voice: "she'd probably yell about how much time we were wasting. She'd probably have already defied the Council and crossed countries in the blink of an eye to get to Gaara."

Ameno smiled slightly at him. "She's saved Kazekage-sama before, right?"

Kankuro hummed in return. "Several times. Years ago, when she first was assigned to Gaara," he stopped momentarily, getting lost in the memories, breath hitching, "she helped free him and then killed one of the assailants without remorse." He turned an intense gaze onto Ameno. "You had to have been there to understand, it was like watching…something gruesomely beautiful." He cringed. "I think that was when we first realized, aside from what she'd said, that Raccoon was a force and truly cared about Gaara."

The truth of that statement stewed in the room for a moment, each paused as they let the implications of that statement sink in, the heart monitor's beeps that only discernable noise. Scampering claws broke them free of the trance in time for Bisuke to bust in.

"Nothing?" Kankuro grunted as the dog trotted up to sit on his haunches beside Ameno.

The dog pawed at his own nose. "I picked up relatively fresh scents in the Kazekage's office and the Jounin Council hall…" he trailed off, "oh, and the strongest scent in a kid's bedroom, but it didn't seem like she was in any of those places—" the dog mused.

"A kid's bedroom?" Kankuro repeated, brow furrowed.

"Oh yeah!" Bisuke leapt onto his feet, tail wagging. "I thought I had her for sure! But the bedroom looked like it was abandoned for quite some time." His ears drooped in a confused pout.

Kankuro pushed himself out of the bed, looking too alarmed. Ameno rushed to his side to try to coax him back into lying down, but he forced himself up with only a minor wince. "Take me there." He demanded, swinging himself to sit on the bed with another grunt of effort.

"You haven't rested enough!" Ameno cried, giving light pushes to his chest, trying to put on her best stern face, but the puppeteer would hear nothing of it.

"It's down the hall Ameno, I'll be fine." He pushed himself to stand up and stared the little dog down once more. "Take me to the place with the strongest scent." He reiterated.

The dog nodded and trotted off at a slow pace, as he was mercifully perceptive, Kankuro staggering along behind him with Ameno supporting him on one side, muttering under her breath about how stubborn Sabakus were.

Kankuro didn't pay her any mind, too busy trying not to choke on the lump in his throat that grew every step down the familiar hallways they took. He shook as they passed the Kazekage's office, sweat started beading on his brow when they turned left into a short hallway.

The door to Gaara's old bedroom was plain, as a child Gaara was given everything but wasn't much a fan of decoration. Out of the corner of his eye Kankuro caught sight of his own old childhood room, just across the hall from Gaara's, never touched either as he'd elected to move out into a different building soon after Gaara made Kazekage—a Jounin complex not too far from the Bazaar, the criss-cross of wire glinted in the artificial light against the black painted wood.

A million different questions were already racing in Kankuro's head: why would Raccoon ever have had to go into Gaara's old room? He hadn't used it since their father died, and the two were usually up all hours of the night anyway in Gaara's office. Why was the scent recent? What was he going to find in this room—one he'd also been avoiding, much like this hallway, since their father had died?

He steeled himself and reached for the knob, not nearly as eager to go inside as Bisuke apparently was. He vaguely wondered how the dog had gotten inside to investigate in the first place, but dismissed that he was a ninken and closed doors probably didn't deter him much.

The dog rushed in ahead of them, immediately sniffing around a toybox set across from a plain looking queen sized bed that Kankuro knew Gaara probably hadn't slept a day in. The rest of the space was pathetically empty, though Kankuro was momentarily assaulted by memories where Gaara had a giant stuffed bear in the corner, two little wooden dummies their father used to make him practice his skills on shoved in the corner near the round window that let natural light in spilling across the bed. The bench Gaara's used to stand on to get a peak of the moon right underneath the window was still there, but was cleared out of childhood books and magazines to instead house a thin layer of dust in the cubby holes built in.

He reluctantly forced himself to follow Bisuke to the large toy box Gaara hadn't gotten rid of for some reason, the lid bolted tightly shut on the cream and yellow colored chest. He wiped away some dust as he stared unseeingly at the top of it, always wondering what an openly hostile child as he remembered Gaara to be would've kept in here. He and Temari used to speculate that he kept the body parts of his favorite challengers inside, or some of his classmates. They came up with all sorts of grotesque theories that just further served to alienate them from their brother.

A drop of moisture fell onto the top of the box as the reality that Gaara was gone suddenly hit. Gaara was kidnapped, maybe dead, and Kankuro and Temari had just let it happen. He found his forehead on top of the lid of the toy box as he struggled to breathe through his overwhelming feeling of self-regret and guilt. He wanted so badly now to go back in time and knock some sense into their younger selves until they understood just how badly their little brother needed help. Maybe he wouldn't be sitting here feeling like such a failure if they hadn't been too busy being blinded by fear to see that Gaara was desperately reaching out his hand for understanding, that he was being devoured.

"Kankuro-san?" The touch of Ameno's hand on his back brought him sharply back to the present and he took a shuddering breath and pulled himself back from the toy box. He grunted to clear his throat a few times, forcing himself to swallow through the lump strangling his throat.

He made himself busy by studying the lock placed firmly over the chest of toys. He fiddled with it for a moment, wondering if it was really worth it to break into Gaara's childhood treasure chest just to find out why his room smelled like his Right Hand ANBU. But still, it was too weird.

"You're sure it was here?" He questioned the dog over his shoulder, he saw the hound bristle in the corner of his eye and huff.

"Yes! It smells like her right now, like she's—" the ninken hesitated, "well, inside?" He sniffed once more for good measure before nodding once as if confirming it to his own self. He nudged his snout next to Kankuro's hand on the lock and nodded.

Voices from the past were sure that the puppeteer would get the box open only to find it filled with persevered body parts or something, but the man scoffed aloud and re-focused back on the lock in hand, eyebrows furrowed. He didn't remember Gaara locking his chest when he was younger and still allowed inside of the boy's room, so what kind of secrets was he keeping inside of here that he felt the need to lock them away?

It felt like a step too far—was he invading his brother's privacy? But if it meant they could save his life shouldn't he do it? Although, Ameno was right—they'd come in here for Raccoon and not Gaara, so he doubted opening this chest was going to get them any closer to bringing him back home. The only way to guarantee that would be to go after Gaara themselves.

"I knew I would find you out of bed, but I didn't think it was going to be in Gaara's old room."

All three whirled around to find Temari at the doorway looking halfway amused and halfway curious.

"Temari, aren't you—" He quickly stood up, ignoring the head rush he nearly suffered.

"Forget that, we're going after Gaara, now." She pushed herself off of the doorway with her shoulder. "Pack your things. We can talk about…whatever it is you were doing on the way."

Ameno blinked owlishly as Temari stepped out, but turned to Kankuro with a meaningful look before following. Kankuro rushed to follow, only to pause at the doorway, looking over his shoulder briefly.

"Bisuke, you're dismissed, thanks for all of your help." Kankuro murmured down to the dog, who gave a nod before disappearing in a puff of smoke and a pop. Kankuro scrutinized the chest once more, knowing he'd have to investigate further when they returned. With a firm nod to himself and a promise he rushed out of the room to prepare for their departure.

'Gaara I'm coming, just hang on.'

N/K

Despite what people believed about him, Naruto wasn't so dense that he didn't realize he couldn't be fighting Itachi. Even after only encountering the man once before so many years ago, he knew that there was no way that the man before him could be the same one who Sasuke had trained so hard to kill, who had incapacitated his legendary sensei for a week and had killed his entire clan. So when he barreled this man over with a giant rasengan he was only half surprised when he ended up staring down at someone else's face.

"Yura." He looked up to find Granny Chiyo hovering over him, her frown deep as she stared down into his dead eyes. Kakashi came up next to them shortly after with Sakura and Pakkun on his heels, the dog sniffing him curiously.

"He's been dead at least 3 days." Naruto couldn't entirely tell because pugs had way too many wrinkles, and Pakkun looked like he never smiled anyway, but the dog seemed to have a thoughtful frown on his face.

"Edo Tensei?" Kakashi guessed, his one silver eyebrow arching up at the dog.

"Something similar, though I can't quite tell what." The dog grunted, sniffing with a deeper frown on his face.

"What is it?" Kakashi prompted as Chiyo kneeled down next to the body with Naruto, tugging at Yura's cloak.

"There's a familiar scent on it, I've smelled it before, but I can't quite remember who it belongs to." The ninken seemed frustrated, wiping his nose with a paw and growling. Kakashi knelt down next to him and gave the dog a cursory pat of comfort that Pakkun didn't seem to entirely appreciate.

Naruto was antsy, ready to get back to running after Gaara, but Chiyo seemed intent on studying the body. She pulled the cloak from his body only to freeze, hand shaking as her grip faltered slightly on one lapel.

"What is…" Sakura started, but put a hand to her mouth in shock, words dying before they could escape her throat.

Across Yura's chest from his left shoulder to his hip was the word "TRAITOR" gouged so deep that the stitches used to close him up were just holding the skin together. Kakashi's eye narrowed and swept to the horrified Chiyo who had since let her hand fall.

"Someone found out about his loyalties before he died inevitably." He groused.

"Whoever did this killed him." Chiyo surmised. "But for him to be back in the Akatsuki's hands, they also must have died."

Naruto had since stopped pacing, but stared unseeing into the word stretched across the man's body, fist tightening until his skin flexed tight over his knuckles in pain.

Naruto didn't have time to think on who did it and why. Right now Gaara was alone, and whoever killed this man fought for him, Naruto was sure of it. He'd make sure he finished the fight for them and make their apparent sacrifice worth it.

D/S

It was the final hours of the Jinchuriki's extraction. It had been blessedly quiet for the last 2 days after the initial fight, even with the Leaf pursuing them, however—

"Tch."

Deidara strayed his eyes over to Kisame, who was grinning despite the previous sound of disbelief.

"Asshole, he still doesn't remember who I am, even after all of that."

Deidara couldn't tell but it looked like Itachi rolled his eyes on the finger next to his partner.

"Are you kidding, you couldn't take down a couple of fuckers from Leaf, Kisame?" Hidan shouted from across the room.

"What did I say about squabbling?" Pein's voice rumbled next to Konan, those freaky purple eyes of his opening to glare at Hidan and his foul mouth.

"That Green Beast is no joke." Kisame snorted, glaring at the hedonist.

"Zetsu, how close are they?" Pein interrupted before the shark and Jashin's most devout could get into an argument.

"They will be here within the next few hours."

Hidan swore again. "This is all your fault Blondie!" He yelled, but didn't break his handsign what with Pein looking like he'd run him through if he even thought about it.

"My fault?!" He sputtered.

"I hate to agree with Hidan of all people." ("What the fuck does that mean Kakuzu?!") The man paused briefly to roll his eyes at his partner. "But if I hadn't had to stop to stitch up that damn body you brought so it could function we'd be done by now."

"I didn't want to bring him!" The blond started to protest.

"Don't even think about blaming me, brat!" Sasori spit from the other hand. "You made too much damn noise and attracted that ANBU right to us." He narrowed his eyes at the bomber. "I lost a perfectly good subordinate because of your carelessness."

"How was I supposed to know he had an ANBU working for him that was that powerful!?" The bomber protested, wincing slightly and looking down at his chest as he remembered that searing heat that had enveloped him from that strange jutsu.

"Awwww," Hidan mocked from his post, causing Deidara's teeth to snap and grind before he'd even finished his sentence, "did the wittle blonde pussy get a boo-boo?" He snorted a laugh at his own quip.

"Shut up, un!" He cried, hating how his face heated up at the childish taunt, but they weren't there! "It was freaky, alright! Her hand glowed purple and she hit me with some jutsu I still don't entirely know the effects of, but that shit hurt!"

Hidan opened his mouth to retort, and Pein looked one step away from murdering them all, grand plan or not, but Zetsu spoke first, voice carrying across the room despite how soft-spoken he usually was.

"It glowed purple you said?"

Unsure if the cannibal was asking to mock him or validate him, Deidara hesitated.

"Did it glow purple or not?" The less patient side of Zetsu snapped.

"Yeah!" He blurted finally, eyes narrowing in suspicion.

"What did she look like?" He continued, much to the confusion of the rest of the members, though Pein didn't look like he was going to stop him any time soon, also seemingly curious.

"You trying to finally get laid Zetsu?" Hidan snorted.

"Shut the fuck up Hidan!" "Answer the question please."

Deidara looked around to the rest of the members, entirely hesitant to answer with all this curiosity aimed at him. Why did Zetsu want to know anyway? She was dead, Sasori had killed her when he ran her through with his tail. If the wound didn't kill her the poison would.

"Uh…" he also didn't like the look on Zetsu's face though, he'd never seen the cannibal so serious before. "She was about 170 centimeters? Tan-ish?" When Zetsu didn't seem entirely satisfied with this vague description, Deidara huffed. "It was dark!" He complained. "And she had a mask on. And I was being attacked, so I wasn't exactly looking at her face." He snorted. "And let us not forget that she's dead."

"Her face was round and she had short dark hair with purple eyes." Sasori suddenly added, tail twitching when the others gave him an incredulous look.

"What? She would've made a nice puppet. But we were on a schedule." He sniffed and the others let the subject drop when Zetsu seemed to relax from his position.

"Is everyone done wasting time now?" Pein groused and grunted when no one said anything further, "Zetsu, go distract the Leaf ninja while we finish up." When the image of Zetsu had flickered away, he continued. "Let's finish this quickly."

G/M

'The third time she died', her voice bounced all around the space, filling up everything in an attempt to drown out the words Gaara wasn't saying as he continued to sit in despondency, 'felt like the realest and the closest to this.'

She felt like she was telling a story to someone who had heard it a million times before. Gaara was sitting listening to the silence on his end that were her stories like someone who tries to listen to music underwater. Everything is muffled, and you're aware maybe someone is talking to you, but you don't try hard enough to hear the words.

'She'd been knocked aside just in time to watch her 5th master get run through by her 6th master's blade, straight through the heart.' Her 6th master was much more merciful than his profession called for. 'She definitely would've died. She was choking on her own blood and her body was becoming heavier with every passing second as she tried to make her way to that dying old asshole.'

In a way her 6th master saved her from death by bondage, she wasn't entirely sure how he'd found her lamp in the chaos that occurred after he'd killed the 5th. Just that one moment it felt like she was falling into the depths of hell, weighed down by her own sin, demons with stereotypical bat wings and sharp teeth snapping at her eyelids and scratching long talons teasingly across her flesh, and the next she was jerked awake covered in her own blood.

This was not that.

She felt her arms moving to the sky, but she still couldn't see them, trapped in Gaara's afterlife woes. This was possibly worse than no longer feeling pain, because now she had to go through the emotional process of Gaara coming to terms with the fact that he was going to die wholly unfulfilled in his mission. It hurt worse than anything she'd ever felt. Everything else in comparison to this time had felt like it would've been quick. She would've rather it had been, but instead she had to endure these countless hours as every muscle in her body stopped feeling until her brain was the only alert thing left. Left to think.

She hated the color white now. She wished she could see something aside from Gaara's own hand. She wished she didn't have to feel her death and Gaara's death at the same time. She wished she'd never fallen in love with him. Things might've been quicker had she not. If she didn't love him, didn't care about him, she would've just fallen to hell like she was supposed to. She would've surrendered by now.

If she didn't love him she would've told him a long time ago what she was. They wouldn't be in this predicament at all. Or maybe he really would be dying alone. Her wishes aren't meant to come true.

She wondered where the stupid montage of her life was. Wasn't something supposed to be playing to show her all of the moments of her life in front of her? Was that happening to Gaara and she just couldn't see? Did she just not get life flashing before her eyes because she was such a despicable person?

If no higher power was going to do it for her she guessed she would just go through the reel herself.

Red hair, lots of red hair. Some images of it resting on her stomach, once on her shoulder and a bottle green eye peeking out from the fringe. These memories fluttered away from her so quickly; floating from her vision away on the wind like dandelion seeds. Faces blurred together of this life she lost and mourned everyday she allowed herself to close her eyes, few and far between. Black hair and black eyes she loved turning away from her. Sad purple eyes matching hers as a light brown scratchy beard grew in—the way she didn't like it. Black hair and black eyes she hated, dozens of them, snakes hissing promises at her, always softened by red hair, muted and backdropped by night, stars shining behind his head. The only time she had the red hair and greenest eyes was as they dulled in the blaze of the desert. She could see him starkly, his hand reaching out for hers much like Gaara's, his mouth opened to finish the second syllable of her name as red pooled around him, gushing from a wound in his pale neck so deep the red wouldn't let it be seen. And the sand greedily drank from him as he died. She'd never forget that. She'd never forget reaching for that hand.

'What are you doing here?'

She saw his face now. Wide eyed, dark-ringed eyes of the sea that she drowned in. The first time she saw those eyes, that bright red hair, how hadn't she known what he would do to her? How could she have doubted for even a moment that he would have her under his power without even trying? She should've kept better guard of herself and her heart, but then he'd looked up angelic and sweet with that boyish grin of curiosity and she knew she'd protect him for the rest of her life. It was too soon.

'What's happening? Why are you here?'

She forgot herself, a year wasn't long enough. She was foolish, a slave to her desires to be free. She tricked herself. The moment he looked at her with so much splintered pain and anguish, betrayal and anger—she should've fought harder. Should've said anything to stay even if it was a lie. Why did she taste every moment they were together in bliss on her tongue—could remember every day in sharp detail—so she could cut herself with it?

Ten years, only four spent together. If she could she would barter with Death for more time. She was just getting to know him all over again. If not both, then him, he had so much to do. What would she have to change to get him to be happy without being hunted? Was there nothing she, even with all this power, could do?

'Everything I do is for you Gaara.' She saw unsteady and wavering hands reach up to cup his face, only to break down into purple smoke at the touch of his skin. What a curse, even as they died together she could offer him no physical comfort.

'I'm here, you're never alone.' He gasped and his eyes fluttered closed, the room went dark until she couldn't discern anything anymore.

In Suna, if you looked up, you could see a trail of smoke riding the wind; floating to find its home.

GMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMG

Soooo, that was also extremely hard. I was trying to go for a mystery vibe where Kankuro was going to be a little detective and I'm not sure how well I pulled it off, what do you guys think? I was also trying to go for a stream of consciousness type of thing in that last scene and wasn't sure if it came across or if Miyako was too coherent for someone who is supposed to be experiencing two deaths at the same time. I might go back and re-write honestly.

Anywho this isn't the end! So don't go sending me nasty reviews, lol. But for real, do let me know what you thought in the comments and prepare yourself because while this one was hella sad, the next one is about to be a rollercoaster ride.

K thanks for coming, love you long time, see you in the next one.

Sentient. Flame. Acronym.