Ch 12: Celebrating

Severus had never thought he would be anybody's father. The life of a spy did not lend itself to long-term romantic entanglements. It was safer for everyone involved to remain unattached. At the same time, no woman had ever been able to compete with the memory of the one he had lost. A few short-term females in his life had accused him of being "hung up." He supposed that he was. Severus was in a monogamous relationship with a ghost.

Now his life had changed. He was an instant father to a nine-year-old boy. His childhood did not present ideal role models for fatherhood. Severus had procured some books on the subject, including several on abused children and one on adopting written by a muggle. Knowing muggle methods of child-rearing would not help in this case. The boy in question had hardly had a traditional childhood. Severus was starting from scratch, and basically had a year and a half to provide Harry a solid start on a normal childhood before he entered Hogwarts and was thrust into the limelight. Even as an academic endeavor, Severus hardly seemed the ideal man for that job.

In the chaos of transferring guardianship, gaining the support of the Order of the Phoenix, and avoiding the wrath of Dumbledore, Christmas had snuck up on them. Severus loathed shopping even when the shops weren't overcrowded and decorated in gaudy sentimentality—this time of year he couldn't imagine taking an already overwhelmed Harry anywhere near them. He also doubted the child had happy memories of the season. For Harry's first Christmas with him, Severus decided to keep things simple.

Minerva had not stopped pestering him. She wanted to spend some time with the boy. No doubt, she felt some residual guilt for her part in leaving Harry on the Dursley's doorstep. Severus invited her to spend Christmas Eve with them. He also cautioned her against going overboard in showering the child with presents. He himself was tempted to do this, but he did not want to give the boy fits. Most likely his definition of holding back and Minerva's were not the same anyway.

On Christmas Eve morning, Severus had the house elves start decorating the parlor when Harry came downstairs. What better way to introduce a child to elves than on Christmas? There might be a touch of the romantic in Severus after all. When Harry saw the little creatures bustling around with the garland and bulbs, he stopped on the stairs, eyes widened.

"Good morning, Harry," Severus said mildly, as if nothing was amiss.

"What are those, sir?" Harry asked in awe.

"Why, elves, of course," Severus answered in amusement.

"Elves? They are real, sir? They can do magic?" Harry was watching two elves levitate a strand of garland up to the ceiling.

"Yes, indeed, Harry. Elves work with wizards in many of the old households. They have their own magic," Severus clapped his hands, "Prospero, please gather everyone so that Harry may meet you all properly."

The elderly elf stopped directing the proceedings, gave Severus a swift bow and made some kind of signal to his troops.

"Harry, this is Fortinbras," a pudgy, but much younger elf stepped forward and bowed, "Ophelia, Dogberry, Ariel, Fleance, Tybalt, Hermia, and Falstaff." As he mentioned each name, a new elf stepped forward. "Normally, they are at my different houses, but I brought some of my more trusted elves here today to help us decorate for Christmas. Would you like to help them?"

Harry nodded. He seemed unable to speak, but his eyes were bright. Severus took that as a good sign.

"Excellent. Let's to breakfast then."

In the kitchen, Ariel had a breakfast of chocolate chip pancakes ready under a warming charm. Severus thought they were positively disgusting, but it did seem like something the boy would like. He insisted on fruit and milk to go with them and had eggs himself. Harry stared at the pancakes as if he did not believe what he was seeing.

"Go ahead, Harry. Unless you'd prefer something else?"

Harry seemed to wake up then. He shook his head and almost dove for the table to begin devouring his too-sugary breakfast. Severus could not avoid smiling to himself.

"But sir, why do you have something else?"

"Oh, Harry, that's all right," Severus assured him. "Chocolate chip pancakes are not my preference. Ariel," Severus gestured to the elf, who was watching her young charge with big eyes and trembling ears to see if he approved, "made those especially for you. She thought you'd like them."

"Oh, I do. Yes, Sir. Thank you, Ariel!"

The elf acknowledged Harry's thanks with a squeak before she vanished.

"Ahh, that means she is glad you like it," Severus told Harry.

With a nod, Harry's eyes left the spot where the elf had disappeared and returned to his plate. He ate the pancakes as if they would vanish too. Severus wasn't sure if he was excited or overwhelmed. He still hadn't figured the boy out. Maybe the child was just hungry. After all, Severus had been keeping meals mostly light because he suspected that Harry was malnourished. A more thorough examination would have to wait a few more days. His own surreptitious inspection had at least uncovered no serious injuries.

After breakfast, they returned to the parlor and Harry helped the elves decorate. He seemed to enjoy watching them create little balls of light and float them up to the tree. One mischievous young elf, Fleance, entertained Harry by juggling the balls and piling them on top of his head. Severus realized it was the first time he had heard Harry giggle. Severus also worked with Harry to hang some of the wizard and muggle ornaments that he had in boxes. The magical ones moved and made noise, while the muggle ones were mostly made of glass or wood.

"Where did you get these, Sir?" Harry asked, looking carefully at a small figure of a boy and a dog. It was painted glass, and quite delicate.

"Most of them belonged to my mother or my grandmother—my father's mother. The muggle ornaments, like the one you are holding, were my grandmother's."

Severus did not tell Harry that these ornaments had been in the box for years. He never decorated for Christmas or anything else. Harry's presence had caused him to have the house elves bring all the ornaments here.

"That's nice, Sir." Severus thought the boy sounded thoughtful, or perhaps wistful. It wasn't hard to imagine why.

"I'm sorry that you don't have more from your mother, Harry. Perhaps your aunt has …" Severus stopped, mostly due to the look on the boy's face. It was as if he had completely shut down. "Well, perhaps we can look in your parents' vault. Maybe there is something stored there."

"Vault?"

"Yes, at Gringott's—the wizard bank. You have a vault, or perhaps several. I have not had time to review the holdings completely. I did order an accounting in accordance with taking over guardianship of you. The vaults are mostly frozen until you come of age, as I will be taking care of all of your needs until then, but if there are heirlooms there that you would like, I am sure there is something we can do."

Severus stopped, because Harry was staring at him during this proclamation as if he had grown a second head. Holidays had never been comfortable for Severus. They often made him think of how much he had lost. After all, a holiday for a lonely person is the perfect time to think of who you can no longer spend it with. Harry, likewise, had lost the people most important to him. In fact, Severus and Harry had that in common. It had never really occurred to Severus before that what they had in common was losing Lily.

"I didn't realize I had anything from my parents, Sir." Harry spoke in a shocked voice. "My aunt always told me they were penniless and that I should be grateful for her charity."

"Oh. Yes, well, your aunt was wrong. She should never have told you those lies about your parents, anyway. I suspect she was jealous. She did not want you to know that you were a wizard." Severus started to go on from there, but Harry interrupted.

"Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon hated magic!" Harry spat.

"That doesn't excuse the way they treated you. You understand that don't you, Harry?" Severus put his fingers gently under the boy's chin, lifting his head up. "If I had known, I would have come for you sooner."

There were tears threatening the corners of the boy's eyes, but he did not speak. Instead, he just gave the barest of a nod. Severus nodded back.

"Today, however, it's Christmas. Let's try to be cheerful! Is there anything you would like to do today or tomorrow to celebrate the holiday?" Severus knew his cheer was forced, but he hoped Harry didn't hold it against him.

Harry shook his head. "I have never had a Christmas before. This has been brilliant."

Suspecting that the Dursleys did in fact celebrate the holiday, Severus did not press the issue on that. He didn't want to know. In time, he would probably find out the full extent of their depraved behavior toward his ward. It was better not to try to push the boy into confiding in him before he was comfortable with it.

They finished decorating the tree and Ariel served Harry hot cocoa with marshmallows. He declared it very good (something else that he had never had before). It was easier for Severus to look at Harry as a child he rescued from an orphanage in some distant land, rather than blood relatives in Surrey. Then he could accept the fact that all these experiences were new to him. Harry had let slip at one point during the decorating that he did not expect any presents. He had, after all, never gotten one.

"You've never gotten a Christmas present?" Severus asked conversationally.

"I've never gotten any kind of present."

"What about your birthday?"

"My aunt and uncle didn't celebrate it. One time a teacher at school recorded when everyone's birthdays were on a big calendar. That's when I found out when it was." Harry told Severus this is a matter of fact tone, but Severus could tell he was hurt by the experience. It was the first time he followed up.

"What about your cousin. Did they celebrate his birthday? Give him Christmas presents?"

"Oh, of course! He was their son." With that simple statement, Harry walked off, as if to examine the tree. Severus let him be. It was just as well. He wasn't sure what he would have said to that.

Fortunately, they were rescued from only having each other's presence by the doting of Ariel and the mischief of Fleance. Harry and Fleance played with a small rubber ball that Severus conjured for Harry until the boy exhausted himself and fell asleep on the settee. Ariel covered the boy with a red and green fuzzy throw blanket and shoved a cup of coffee into Severus's hands. He sat by the fire pensively, watching the boy sleep and thinking that he looked even younger that way.

Harry woke to Severus's gentle shake and he led the boy into the kitchen where Ariel had grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup waiting. He showed the boy how to dip his sandwich into the soup, and the child seemed to enjoy the meal even more. To Severus, the meal seemed like a childhood classic. It was cozy and comforting. While he ate, the boy prattled on about decorating the parlor and playing with Fleance. Severus smiled at him.

With lunch done, Severus took the boy up for a bath before Minerva's arrival. Determined to make every part of the day special, Severus spelled green and red bubbles into the tub. Harry simply gaped at him, but Severus said nothing and just gruffly told the boy to make sure he washed his hair. He then set out some clothing for Harry. He decided to forgo wizard's robes, since he wanted to child to be comfortable. Severus had been dressing in muggle clothing since bringing Harry home. There would be plenty of time to have Harry adjust to his new life.

When Minerva arrived, Severus introduced her. She had apparated and come through the front door, carrying two packages in brightly wrapped paper. One had snitches traveling around it.

"Harry, this is Professor McGonagall, a friend of mine. We teach at the same school."

"Hello, Ma'am." Harry's greeting was somewhat shy, but Severus did not consider it rude. Harry sat on the settee, looking across the room at the two adults.

"I was a friend of your parents, Harry," Minerva began by way of introduction, "I taught them both at school as well, of course. They were in my House."

"I haven't really explained that to him, Minerva." Severus tried not to sound exasperated.

"Oh, yes of course. Too much already? Well, no matter. It means that I knew your parents very well through their years at school." Minerva assured him.

"Oh, all right," Harry replied, somewhat nervously.

"Minerva, can I get you something?" Severus asked her, partly to change the subject. "Some tea?"

"Certainly, Severus. I will never turn down a good cup."

Severus nodded. "Ariel!"

Ariel popped in, and Severus ordered tea for the adults and cocoa again for Harry. He was spoiling the boy, but it was Christmas after all. Ariel returned soon with the tea service and handed Harry a mug with a peppermint stick in it. He looked both shocked and thrilled. It did not take much, Severus had noted.

"You brought your house elves, Severus?" Minerva asked conversationally.

"I have brought a few here. I will decide who will remain after Christmas. I wanted to see if they would get on with Harry. Ariel seems to adore him, and there is a young one named Fleance that he likes. Right, Harry?" Severus nodded toward his ward, who looked up from the cocoa.

"Oh, yes, Sir. Fleance is great!"

"That elf is probably more likely to get him into trouble than keep him out of it, but he'll be good company, anyway." Severus noted wryly.

Minerva smiled knowingly and said to Harry, "How do you like your new home, Harry?"

Severus paused in drinking his tea and wished she hadn't asked that. He feared that asking about Harry's new home would bring up his old one. He need not have worried though. Instead, the boy gave her a genuine, wide grin.

"It's brilliant, Ma'am. I have a great big bedroom, and a bed, and my own bathroom. There's lots to eat and Severus has given me all these new clothes. I even have some toys!" Harry turned to Severus, as if to thank him.

"That's wonderful, Harry. It sounds like you are really settling in. I am sure that Severus will get you more toys he has had time to take you shopping." She winked at him, and he rolled his eyes.

"Yes, Minerva. I am hardly qualified to judge the proper amusement for a nine-year-old boy. We will work on that."

This exchange seemed to just confuse Harry, but he also appeared to like the banter from the two adult wizards in the room.

"Well, Harry, I hope you don't mind opening my present early. I simply could not wait until the morning. It would get lost in all of the other presents then anyway." Minerva told him, handing him the gift in the snitch-covered wrapping.

Grasping the package, Harry held onto it loosely. To avoid either of them seeming to stare at him and cause embarrassment, Minerva handed Severus the other package.

"Now, Severus, you know I get you something every year." Minerva tutted, heading off his complaints.

"Go ahead, Harry. Unwrap it!" Severus implored gently. He stood up and went over to the settee to sit next to the boy, sensing that he needed some support.

"It's my first present," Harry told him quietly.

"Yes, I know. However, it will not be the last. Go ahead and open it." Severus looked into the boy's eyes and reassured him. It seemed to do the trick.

Carefully, Harry pulled open the paper, which had been spell-wrapped and opened easily. Inside was a set of toy quidditch players and balls. Harry looked at it, both curious and intrigued.

"Quidditch is a wizard sport, played on broomsticks," Severus informed him.

"Your father used to play," Minerva put in proudly.

"Trying to recruit him for the Gryffindor team already, Minerva?" Severus demanded, only half teasing.

"Now, Severus, that toy is perfect for boys his age. The shop was full of boys ogling the set!" Minerva began to tell him off, but Severus held up a hand to stop her.

"Yes, yes. Quite right. Once he learns what it does, and what quidditch is, I think he will love it."

"Thanks again …" Harry began.

"Minerva, or Professor McGonagall," she reminded him, before he could call her 'Ma'am' again.

"Thank you, Professor McGonagall," Harry told her, blushing slightly. "Open yours, Sir!"

Cheeky, Severus thought. He opened his package though. Inside he found a nice, rare tea. "Thank you, Minerva. This is much appreciated." His response was genuine. It was a fine gift. He hoped she liked the Scotch he had sent her.

They had a good time by the fireplace, where unfortunately Minerva spent too much time telling embarrassing stories of Severus's schooldays alongside the general information about Hogwarts they imparted to Harry. After a while, Ariel announced the meal was ready and they sat down in the dining room to ham, mashed potatoes, three types of vegetables, and other assorted sides, followed by pudding. Harry barely made it through the meal without falling asleep, and Severus carried him up to bed. It wasn't until he was done transfiguring his clothes into pajamas and settling him under the covers that he saw that Minerva had followed him up.

"This is a lovely home you've made for him, Severus," Minerva said to him, after they had gently closed the door.

"He is settling in. It is going to be a recovery period. I do not know how long yet," Severus confided. He had not had a chance to talk to anyone about Harry yet. He had not yet decided he would.

"I can see that. He's never gotten a Christmas present before, Severus? Surely, I heard wrong. How can that be?"

"You know that he is here for a reason. Did you forget what those horrible muggles did to him?" Severus hissed, even though they had reached the bottom of the stairs. His response was more out of anger than a need to be quiet

"No. I suppose I was hoping it was not as bad as I had feared," she admitted.

"I do not yet know how bad it was," Severus told her. "What I do know is bad enough. He was neglected. He definitely did not get enough food. By that I do not mean he was given small meals. I mean he did not get enough meals. He had only his cousin's hand-me-downs as clothes. They were most certainly verbally abusive."

"So … what he said about having a room and a bed …"

"Exactly. He has had neither before."

"Oh, my."

"I think you are the best person for him, Severus," Minerva told him firmly.

"How can you possibly say that?"

"Because of what you have done for him already. Because of what you have risked. In that boy's life, no one has done as much for him as you. Except for one person. Don't tell me you did this because of some Vow, Severus. I know that this is more. You saw a child suffering—her child. You could not look past that."

"You are right, I could not. That does not mean I am the best person to raise him. Nonetheless, I am who he has. I am going to do my best not to let him down. Too many people have done that already."