I don't own anything Inuyasha.
A/N: discord was talking about our shipping playlists, so I started one for writing/reading SessKag! If you would like, give a listen:
playlist/5EBOJY6eRfYixS8GKZJafj?si=a5JbsK_ASfe-Xlm1zQXqyQ
sorry if there are errors
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Their routine stayed relatively the same over the next two days.
They woke early to hike through the shady trees, startling small creatures and breathing the cool morning air in deep as they went. He did not bound and run anymore, choosing to travel almost aimlessly while she followed. Their shared silence was companionable, though usually did not last long. Before they returned to the cabin for lunch, Kagome would begin telling him random stories about the world he found himself in. Both were unsure if the inu was actually comprehending everything, but she would keep trying to explain subway systems, university, and even the grocery store while his attention wavered. The one-sided conversations died down around mid-afternoon once she beckoned him to her on the main room's floor and they concentrated on their growing auras.
Now that Kagome had fully accepted her responsibility for his return, whatever the outcome, the blossoming miko could feel her power grow. It came habitually and more at her command. Her strong, dexterous hands would alight as they traveled through the billowing fur around his neck. They were supposed to repel each other, and the disquieting comfort in her anxious touches when the contradictory powers actively accepted and built each other up instead heightened the tension between them. More and more, she felt his presence as the youkai from her past than the dog in front of her, and she was becoming more aware of their proximity. Closing her eyes, she could imagine her fingertips coaxing him to wake up as they glided over his smooth cheeks and furrowed brow instead of the canine face.
Kagome's touches were necessary, and he never rejected them, but their platonic familiarity threw her off balance. Her fingernails would leave burning trails on his skin as they left her magic in their wake, and the dangerous crackles of his power would quicken her breath and raise the hair on her arms. Every now and again, she would forcefully empty the awkwardness from her mind, reminding herself that there had always been a frightening intimacy in dealing with demons. They were not human. They were an ethereal thing that should be untouchable. She had an ability to neglect a natural fear of them, but never could escape her awe. With a sigh, Kagome felt the soothing heat from his imposing form down to her bones along with his youki sparking against her aura and leaned into it.
She could feel his struggle to match her own power, but kept as steady as possible, welcoming whatever he could give. There was a hurdle Sesshoumaru buffered up against that prevented his full transformation, even as they stretched each other thin with the effort. After a time, the exercise would wear them both out and Kagome would have to stop. She would give Sesshoumaru a sleepy grin as the mountain breezes and sounds of rustling leaves filled the cabin, lulling their exhausted minds into muggy consciousness. Retreating to her small tatami bed, and him curling in the streaming sunlight from the main room, they would sink into the comfort of quiet and sleep the late afternoon away.
When evening came around she would open the front door for him to wander around while she cooked dinner. He would stand at the threshold and look towards her before crossing it, waiting. She was unsure of what exactly she saw in his expression. His markings were so vibrant and eyes were now permanently red, as they had been in the past whenever he was in his true form, but they no longer struck fear in her. She did miss the gold, though. He was not getting larger, which was a surprise, but the mane of unnaturally soft fur that wrapped around his neck seemed to extend further whenever she wasn't looking. She gestured for him to explore outside, and it now trailed on the ground as he walked into the darkening shadows of the forest.
She never once wondered if he would come back. They might be feeling anxious about their close contact, but she could feel his acceptance of it, too. She always had a dish waiting for him when he returned.
On the third day, they took a game trail that led further up the peak. The overcast sky promised a coming storm and the ominous feel of the muggy forest had Sesshoumaru on high alert. Obsessively, he sniffed at the air, determined to be ready for the change when it eventually came.
But when the scent of unfamiliar youki hit his nose instead, he was sent reeling.
Without a second thought, Sesshoumaru jumped from the path and bolted after it. Kagome was screaming his name behind him, but he gave it little mind. It was just a hint on the breeze, a tease of what was thought extinct, but he chased it with abandon. It could be… It just might be…
Sesshoumaru could sense the feel of another demon fade away and, instinctually, he leapt to fly after it. His paws stretched to ride the waves of youki that, in the past, would swirl and collide upon itself to allow him to run on thin air, but instead they met nothing. His bold, trusting leap pushed him high into the air, but now he was coming back to the earth fast. Sesshoumaru braced before hitting a tree as he crashed down, cracking the sturdy wood with the force. His vision swam with bright lights and inky clouds for a moment before he was able to shake off the injury, yet the indignation remained. So much of what he felt he could do was still buried deep, and the complete knowledge of who he could be was still lost in the haze. Groaning, he got back up on his paws and scented the air again.
The fleeting sense of youkai was gone. Now that he had a moment to be calm and consider it, the scent had been so small that he questioned if it had been real at all, or just part of his desperate imagination.
Muffled in the thick, late summer's growth of the forest, Kagome kept calling out for him. He recognized the tone from years past, though then she had been calling after his brother-
The giant dog felt a punch to his gut as a wisp of memory assaulted him, making him dizzy all over again. There had been a half-demon, a half-brother… Inuyasha.
They were just fragments of feelings, but Sesshoumaru remembered battling a young man with silver hair and a giant blade. He remembered a quest to banish a jewel and a spider from the world. He could remember seeing Kagome clearly, her brilliant, determined eyes and glowing arrow easily claiming whatever they sought after. She was human, but a force as well, and had been at his brother's side.
Then, a memory of Inuyasha with black hair and purple eyes, unable to return back to his hanyou form after a new moon night, came to his struggling mind. He was trying to explain something to him, a truth about the future…
The clouds above began to hang low in the sky, and a deep rumble from far off rolled through the earth. The discontent in the air heightened his own as visions of his past came to him. Seeing his half-brother's human face for the first time was when he had truly felt the world changing. There had been signs before this, such as fewer lower-level demons and pesky holy users. They had been, arrogantly, below his notice. He was foolish, but there was not much to do about the Shifting. For many years after Inuyasha fully transitioned, Sesshoumaru had fought against succumbing fully to his primal animal form. The considerable strength he held had kept him conscious longer than most, making him a helpless witness to the diminishment of demons.
He could not remember much, and it was hard to hold onto a thought for long as his consciousness drifted seamlessly between who he was back to the dog he had been for centuries. Sesshoumaru could feel the clarity slipping away again and he fought against it, concentrating on the sound of Kagome echoing his name through the quiet forest.
A loud crack of thunder reverberated in the clouds, breaking his tenuous hold on the memory with the flash of another one. The inu smelled threatened rain, looked up at the turbulent skies, and remembered being able to call down lightning.
.
The rain had caught them right when they broke through the clearing leading to the cabin. Kagome fussed over dusting him off under the small entryway roof before entering, which caused her to become soaked since she could not fit underneath with the very large dog taking up all of the space.
Finally making it inside herself, Kagome grabbed a thread-bare towel and wrapped her hair up. Oddly, she felt cleaner covered in the wild rain than from the shower that morning, so she replaced her sodden clothes with comfy pajamas and padded back into the kitchen. The unruly waves of her raven hair retained the scent of petrichor and pine. She felt fifteen again, with her reiki warming her from the inside and the sound of the summer storm rolling through branches and bushes outside. Whenever Kagome reflected on her time back in the past, it was mostly of their adventures and the quiet moments of reprieve. This, however, was true nostalgia. She could recall the feeling deep in her soul of being with her feudal family, through scent and sound. Kagome could not help but smile as she embraced the feeling. The pangs used to be overwhelming, but no longer. She had learned to face it and celebrate their memory.
Glancing over at Sesshoumaru, who was currently using his massive back paw to scratch debris free from behind his ear, Kagome thought that, perhaps, she had been approaching engaging his mind in the wrong way.
.
As the storm resumed outside, the open windows circulated the air throughout their humid, temporary home, bringing just enough relief from the sticky summer day to feel comfortable. After washing her rain-soaked clothes, preparing their late lunch, and tidying the small space, it wasn't until early in the evening when Kagome approached him with a large, wooden brush in her hand. They had skipped their normal afternoon spiritual session, but now Kagome had an idea. She placed a large, folded blanket on the floor, sat upon it and gestured to his long, mokomoko. Sesshoumaru tilted his head in confusion, but did not react as she lifted the surprisingly heavy appendage into her lap. Starting from the bottom, the priestess started brushing out the crumpled leaves and twigs. She was silent for a minute before her power rose to the surface and she coated him with reiki while she groomed.
"I bet you are tired of hearing about the present."
Sesshoumaru was tired, but not of her stories. He just could not understand them fully. Through their sessions he was able to comprehend her speech more and more, but it highlighted how many of those words were still foreign to him. His intuition still aided him, though. She was earnest and genuine. Kagome was trying to prepare him for what was to come, but a lot of what she said simply went over his head.
He watched her brush through his glowing fur and, her eyes hidden behind her puffy bangs, heard her sigh, "I remember the first time I saw you."
An anticipation rose between them and the inu slowed his breath in order to hear her quiet, gentle voice. "Now that I think about it," she continued after a long moment, "that was before I had even met Shippo. I've known you longer than most of who I considered myself close to." A far off roll of thunder sounded and she smiled. "You had always reminded me of summer storms, but back then I still feared them a bit."
The brush, brilliant with reiki, stroked through his fur, slowly moving up towards his neck. Her other hand would follow, smoothing out the path and feeling his youki prick against her palm. Kagome giggled. "Oh, that tickles a bit." Sesshoumaru rested his head down again, still staring at her half-concealed face, and she finally looked back. "I don't know if you remember, Sesshoumaru, but you were a force of nature. You could strike without warning. Your voice alone could shake the foundations of some of the most powerful creatures. You were tenacious, to a fault. And deadly."
He could feel her energy shift as she recalled their early meetings. It sharpened, protective and weary, against the impression he had left in her. Then, with a deep breath, it was suddenly warm and all encompassing.
"But that was who you were. I think you were so lost, back then. After learning your whole story, and the history with your father, I think you were more hurt than truly angry." He could smell the salt of her gathering tears before the first one wistfully fell from her cheeks, but she was still smiling a small, genuine, and heartfelt smile.
"Even Inuyasha could not come close to understanding what you were going through. He had his own problems," she wiped at her face and chuckled, "That is an understatement, but you both went through so much. Who you became through those trials was so much stronger than whatever strength you tried to gain through your father. Once you let him go, you determined on your own what strength truly was. He left behind lessons for you, but you used your own power to surpass him."
Kagome set his mokomoko down and moved to sit in the crux of his large form. He curled around her, more to keep his eye contact more than anything else, and she gave him an appreciated scratch on the top of his head. "I don't know the whole story, but do you know what I think really started changing you?" She paused, almost expecting him to respond, then resumed her soothing, power-laced brush strokes down his back. "Do you remember Rin?"
The name sparked his power and his eyes glazed over as the memory of a small, human girl flooded him. Trails of sharp, lightning like youki generated from his entire body, traveling over Kagome's body and swelling to rebuff against the wooden walls of the large room.
"Whoa!" Kagome gasped, her hands rubbing strong, comforting circles against his back and chest in an attempt to keep him laying down. The sound of his grinding fangs gritted against her spine, the abnormally loud creaking causing her own jaw to clench. His muscles curled beneath the weight of her body. She knew there was not much she could do if he decided to spring, to flee, but she gripped him tighter anyhow. Then, she felt the gap between their powers, an opening created from his surge that she could match, and pushed herself to meet his level. It grew, spectacularly, and she was awed by the light show and the feeling of strength within her. His energy shook her inside like the distant popping of fireworks and the entire cabin glowed with their combined light. "I'll take that as a yes."
The primal haze that had reacted to Rin's memory faded. It took some time, but eventually his red eyes came back into focus and his breathing settled. Their powers calmed as well, and Kagome chanted nonsensical promises while the tension eased. He had not remembered Rin- not really- not until the woman had said her name aloud. In a rush, he was given a sense of who he had been. Vicious. Cold. A killer. Then, he remembered being ripped apart by the wind. He had been feral, growling, and half-dead when a tiny girl had swallowed her fear to approach him, offering aid.
The memory of Rin walking up to him despite his warning and Kagome standing her ground at that warehouse where she had found him mixed together. Sesshoumaru could remember the life of the girl who he had saved and claimed by his sword. Rin was a ray of sunshine that had broken through the darkest time of his life. Her devotion had washed him clean of his long held anger. She had saved him, in a way he never thought possible for a demon such as himself, and he had ensured her a happy life in return. In the chaotic mix of memory and flood of once-forgotten feelings, the inuyoukai recalled her final days. Her dutiful husband worried at her side and her many grandchildren surrounded her bed. He was fortuitous to have been visiting the time that he did. She had wanted to fly, one last time, and he could never refuse her. She felt paper thin within his grasp, but her still girlish laughter had filled the sky and Rin passed peacefully in his arms, the way she was once revived, before they had landed.
Now, there was Kagome, there to save him from a fate he could have never foreseen, and he almost saw the future playing out as it had happened before. She would age, and love, and die, and he would be left alone. He would be bound to her, be indebted to her, and then have to leave her behind.
"It's okay, Sesshoumaru," she was still chanting. "I'm right here. You're okay. I know it hurts, I really do. But I'm right here."
As the surge of power faded, he could feel his consciousness follow. Their aura exercises always did tire them, but this wave of exhaustion threatened to throw him overboard into a deep sleep. The demon fought against it, determined to stay with Kagome and the healing spirit that was bringing him back to life.
Her power sputtered from her fingertips. They both were close to their limit. He could see her drooping shoulders and her heavy eyelids, knowing he was close behind her in sleep. "I'm here," she promised. "You are going to be okay. I know it. You are so dangerous," her half-asleep mind voiced as she leaned into the soft fur of his chest. "But, you are also so honorable. I believe in you, Sesshoumaru, and who you could be now."
Her raven hair brushed against her flushed cheeks. The unshed tears sat on the edge of her azure eyes, the light from her reiki highlighting her emotion clearly to him. Even fatigued, she kept their eye contact, opening herself up to his observation. She had done so much for so many and still was giving herself to him. Even as his mind drifted off to the rhythm of soft, pattering rain he could feel the change. The natural order of the world could not hold back his power any longer because Kagome had defied it and welcomed him to stand with her. Following the last surge of youki, Sesshoumaru could recognize what he truly was and the capability this priestess saw in him. Even with all the inherent dangers, she thought he was worth it.
And what did he think of her?
He was so lost in this odd world that had moved on without him. Somehow, she was of that world, and of his. She not only knew him for what he was, but what he could be. She was a bridge. A guiding light. The woman settled into him and, with a heavy, contented sigh, closed her eyes and gave in to sleep.
Kagome was all heart. Her strength and stubbornness came from it, a truth she had shown time and time again. She was a being of healing, of potential, and of second chances.
Unable to fight against the pull of sleep any longer, Sesshoumaru succumbed. Night fully overtook the rainy forest outside as he felt himself drift into an abyss...
And be pulled out from one at the same time.
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