Hey everyone its Teknofan.
This segment was originally posted in the review section of the story FSN/ MHA "Conflicting Ideals" by Author Razamataz.
After recent developments I decided to update and post this Pitch Meeting Style review as a fanfic to save everyone the trouble of trying to dig through the review section.
Originally my fellow reviewer Zaru and myself gave rather scathing reviews of this story in the crossover section full of a lot of cursing and vitriol and in hindsight that was rude and unprofessional.
And for that I apologize.
Anyways with that being said lets get on with the review:
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Movie Executive (ME): Hey I heard you got an idea for a great fic
ScreenWriter (SW): I sure do sir. It's a crossover fic between two wildly popular franchises "My Hero Academia" and "Fate/Stay Night". Where a guy named Shirou and his girlfriend Rin get zapped into a different world where 80% of the population have special powers which are nicknamed quirks by some old wizard.
ME: OH, wow wow wow this sounds good.
SW: I thought so too. Well it starts off with some old samurai type hero named "Yoroi Musha "telling a bunch of other proheroes about that one time he got jumped in a dark alleyway by some guy wielding two swords.
ME: Oh, is that that Shirou guy?
SW: Actually he calls himself Archer.
ME: Oh really!
SW: But it really is Shirou.
ME: Oh okay. But why is he attacking Yoroi Musha? And for that matter isn't Yoroi Musha one of the Top ten heroes? It must have been a tough fight.
SW: Actually it was super easy, barely an inconvenience. And as for why Shirou attacks and beats up an old guy its because he wanted to see how good he was as a hero.
ME: Beating up old people is tight.
SW: It certainly is. So later we find out that both Shirou and Rin are actually in their 40s slash 30s but that wizard guy I mentioned turned them back into 14 year olds.
ME: Oh he can do that too!
SW: Well he is a wizard he can pretty much do whatever is convenient for the plot.
ME: Okay
SW: So anyways we also found out that Shirou wanted to be a hero who could save everyone when he was a kid and then he fought in a secret magic war for some wish making cup and then learned magic that let him make a bunch of magic swords and with the help of his girlfriend he started traveling around his old world saving as many as he could from disaster and fighting monsters and what not.
ME: Uh huh
SW: But over time he got tired and he started blaming other people for when not everybody was saved and he grew bitter and then the wizard thing I mentioned earlier happened.
ME: Oh wow wow wow this a lot to take in.
SW: Sorry Ill wrap up the backstory. Well as I said he and his girlfriend are 14 again and in this world where people have superpowers and being a superhero is a legitimate profession with a license. And Shirou hates it.
ME: Oh, he hates it.
SW: He hates it.
ME: Why's that?
SW: Well Shirou thinks that a hero is someone who gives and sacrifices everything to save people and should do whatever is necessary to win even if you get hated for it . While being a prohero here is treated more like a high paying job with most competing to save more people or fight more villains so they can actually get paid more.
ME: So like Hollywood Movie actors.
SW: Exactly. So like I said Shirou doesn't like this since it clashes with his ideals. So he disguises himself as a vigilante named archer and goes around fighting and beating up other heroes to test them and finds that a lot of them aren't very good.
ME: Oh, that's rude. But okay.
SW: But then both Shirou and Rin get busted by the cops since in Japan minors aren't allowed to live on their own
ME: Oh yeah because they're 14 again. Why is that?
SW: Plot reasons.
ME: Oh, okay.
SW: So the police try to put them in foster care but then they run away and eventually they get into fight with a bunch of proheroes and they end up fighting and putting a bunch of said pros in the hospital before they finally get taken down.
ME: Oh wow.
SW: Oh and the whole fight gets recorded and put on the national news
ME: Oh wow wow wow. Well I guess they're screwed.
SW: Not really. You see while in police custody Rin manages to makes a deal with Principal Nedzu.
ME: Who?
SW: An animal guy who has a quirk that makes him super smart and he's the principal of the greatest hero school ever: UA high.
ME: Oh, but wait, what is a school principal doing at a police station?
SW: To advance the plot.
ME: Oh well alright then.
SW: So Rin makes a deal that if Shirou becomes number one in the entrance exam then he will be allowed to enroll in their hero course and she would go into their general ed. And the school would provide free room and board to boot.
ME: But didn't they just pummel a bunch of pro heroes on tv? Why would he do this?
SW: For good PR of course. So UA could show that they can help misguided youth or something like that.
ME: I don't know. If this animal guy is so smart shouldn't he realize there would be some serious liability issues with this deal.
SW: Yeah he would that's why Rin used her magic to hypnotize him into making the deal.
ME: Oh! Wow! Magic sure is convenient.
SW: It certainly is. Especially for making this story work.
ME: So what happens next.
SW: Well before the exam Shirou ends up getting captured by villains who want him to join their team.
ME: Oh no.
SW: Yeah the bad guy wants Shirou to help him kill the number one hero All Might. But then Shirou says "Who"?
ME: Who?
SW: He says who.
ME: He doesn't know who All Might is?
SW: That's right.
ME: He's been stuck in this world for who knows how long and he doesn't know who All Might is?
SW: Yeah he never bothered learning who All-Might is or any of the major players.
ME: Why is that?
SW: Because he was more interested in beating up and talking down to other people about why they suck as heroes.
ME: That doesn't sound like something he should do
SW: Well Shirou is a twisted and distorted individual who follows his own logic so it's okay.
ME: Oh well alright then
SW: So anyways later on we see Shirou at the exam and-
ME: Hey aren't you skipping ahead a bit here?
SW: What?
ME: I mean how did Shirou get away from the bad guys it must have been tough.
SW: Actually it was super easy, barely an inconvenience. After he said no the bad guys just simply teleported him back off-screen and that was it.
ME: That was it?
SW: That was it.
ME: And Shirou didn't try to stop them or anything even after they said they wanted to kill All-Might.
SW: Yeah Shirou just saw the main bad guy as an overgrown man-child who simply needs a reality check and then he'll change his ways.
ME:….That doesn't said right at all.
SW: What do you mean?
ME: I mean Shirou beats up actual heroes and talks down to them and yet when he meets real villains he just walks away without doing anything.
SW: That's right.
ME: But why?
SW: Because he's distorted remember. That and if we take out the main bad guy this early we would have to come up with whole new canon material to move forward.
ME: Oh, right, gotcha. Hey wait, what did you say earlier about it being off-screen?
SW: Oh well in order to move the story along quicker we'll have key scenes happen off screen between chapters and just simply allude to them.
ME: Oh like what.
SW: Well aside from the bad guys letting Shirou go, there is a scene where Shirou destroys a giant robot, a scene where he gets confronted by the younger brother of one the heroes he beat on tv, beating up said brother during a training exercise, sneaking out and still doing vigilante stuff when he supposed to be confined to campus, stuff like that.
ME: Okay, doing stuff off screen to save time is tight.
SW: It certainly is
ME: So then what happens?
SW: Well he takes the exam and gets first place but not before he scares a bunch of other applicants into failing.
ME: Okay. Why?
SW: Because heroing is serious business and Shirou has no patience for a bunch of kids who thinks being a hero is supposed to be fun.
ME: That seems kinda heavy handed and pretentious for a guy who is not a teacher or anything.
SW: Exactly and he continues to be preachy, overbearing, and talks down to nearly everyone in the fic.
ME: I don't know, isn't Shirou supposed to be a good-natured guy that just wants to save people? I mean even if this supposed to be an older and grittier Shirou he still feels out-of-character in this setting.
SW: Oh well the truth is Shirou is just a character in name only at this point. He's basically a voicepiece for the author to air their perceived grievances with the setting of My Hero Academia.
ME: Ohhhhhhhhhhh, that is genius.
SW: Thank you. Your too kind.
ME: So, what else happens.
SW: Well like I said Shirou continues to attend UA with the events of the original manga playing out but with Shirou consistently winning moral arguments with other characters, winning every fight he is in, constantly pointing out everything wrong with hero society, starting his own after school fight club, oh and as I said earlier he still sneaks out to be a vigilante without getting caught.
ME: Okay, but what about everyone else?
SW: What do you mean everyone else?
ME: Well this is a crossover; I mean what about all the other characters in My Hero Academia.
SW: Oh, they're pretty much just there for Shirou to beat, belittle, berate, and to do what he tells him to do. Or a combination thereof.
ME: Even Midoriya?
SW: Who?
ME: You know Izuku Midoriya? The main character of My Hero Academia?
SW: Oh him. Yeah, he is technically there but a lot of his defining moments from the original canon are either glossed over or gone. Like not beating Bakugo in the battle trial, not getting past the first event of the sports fest, glossing over the scene where he chooses his hero name, unimportant stuff.
ME: Really?
SW: Well this story can't have two main protagonists. And since Shirou is the author's voicepiece its only natural that Midoriya and by extension everyone else is relegated to a more minor role.
ME: Even the teachers and other heroes who have like decades of collective experience of teaching and being heroes?
SW: Especially the teachers. Its why Shirou started that little fight club I mentioned earlier. He is the only one who knows what it means to be a real hero after all.
ME: It sounds like this entire setting full of interesting characters, history, and background is bending over backwards for a guy who is pretty much giving them all the proverbial finger.
SW: Pretty much.
ME: And he doesn't suffer any kind of consequences or backlash from any of his actions.
SW: Of course not. We have a scene where Shirou chucks a dagger past Endeavour's head on National Television and a scene where he heals a guy's crippling injuries in a super easy, barely inconvenient manner. He can pretty much do whatever he pleases.
ME: Oh, wow wow wow! Hey didn't they do same thing with that Rey girl in Star Wars.
SW: My thoughts exactly. I figure what works for Star Wars will certainly work here.
ME: Lifting good ideas from other works is tight
SW: Tight indeed. So, what do you think?
ME: Well I gotta be honest. This fic is looking more like a takeover rather than a crossover with a gratuitous amount of Fan Wanking in regards to Shirou. Are you sure people are going to want to read what is basically the Author moaning about what they find wrong with the setting of a wildly popular series?
SW: Oh, not an issue sir. You see this is Fanfiction dot net and Shirou Emiya is a character that a lot of people who frequent this site see themselves living viscerally through. So as long as we have Shirou Emiya being awesome then about nine in ten readers will love this fic.
ME: Oh, wow really?
SW: Oh Yeah. They'll constantly post one note reviews like "this is awesome", "I want to see Shirou fight more", " This is the best crossover eva", stuff like that.
ME: Wow wow wow, having a low brow target audience of manchildren with no concept of what makes an engaging story is so tight.
SW: It certainly is.
ME: Hey what about the one in ten readers who won't like this fic.
SW: Oh, those guys. One or two will probably either write a really scathing review full of lot of cursing and vitriol. While the rest will point out all the so-called flaws and fallacies of the story in a calm and logical manner.
ME: Wow what a bunch of nerds.
SW: Or if they're really clever then one of them will write a review that's styled after a popular segment show on a YouTube channel. Pointing out everything supposedly wrong while cleverly mocking the story, the author, and all the readers who think this fic is awesome.
ME: Oh, please who would take the time to write something like that?
SW: I know right.
Hope you all enjoyed ;)