Chapter 3: We'll Have Other Chances
The elevator door chimed open and Chloe resisted the urge to slide her arms around Lucifer's waist and take on some of his weight. She'd tried a few times already and was rebuffed with a charming smile that didn't meet his eyes and repeated assurances that he would be fine as soon as he was able to recharge with a little sleep.
But he still swayed on his feet and when they stepped out of the elevator she was moments from reaching out to steady him when he veered sharply toward the penthouse's ridiculously large bathroom.
She watched helplessly as he shucked his clothes and left them where they fell. A sure sign something was wrong. The fastidiously clean Lucifer would never leave such a sight on his pristine marble floor.
Anxiety knotted in her chest as she picked up every piece. Focus drawn to the blood-soaked back and cuffs where his wrists had been ripped apart by the celestial chains and where Amenadiel had carved away his fatally damaged wings.
The shower burst to life while she stood stupefied staring down at his bloody clothing. She dropped it on the edge of the bar to dispose of later and went to check on him. But what she found made her breath hitch and her pulse rise. Her normally strong, invulnerable devil swayed beneath the steady flow of steamy water, simply letting it sluice over his skin, but was otherwise motionless beneath the spray.
With a huff of determination, she pulled off her own clothes and joined him, aghast when her eyes fell to the red and raw wing-shaped scars on his back.
When he didn't acknowledge her presence, she picked up the floofy sponge, squeezed the ridiculously overpriced, silky soap into it and set herself the task of getting him clean as quickly as possible. Afraid he wouldn't be able to stay upright for much longer.
"Not exactly how I expected this first to go." She could hear the humorous intent behind the words but they were delivered on a wearily exhausted sigh that caused her anxiety level to rise. If he fell over, there was no way she could get him into bed by herself.
She pressed a gentle kiss to his shoulder and offered a reassuring smile. "We'll have other chances."
But his only response was a non-committal hum, as if speaking took more energy than he had to give, so she redoubled her efforts to clean him quickly. Flecks of dried blood sloughed off his skin, briefly turning the rivulets of water pink. She dabbed gently over the raw scars on his back and bit her lip when he tensed.
"I'm sorry. I'll be quick."
She carefully cleaned the deep cuts that ringed both wrists and reverently pressed her lips to each, hopeful that he could feel her love sink beneath the pain. When he didn't respond, water from the rain shower washed away the salty tears that dripped down her cheeks.
The sponge moved clinically across his smooth skin and she resisted the temptation to trace the freckles painted like star constellations across his chest. She'd have another chance.
"Almost done." She soothed as her fingers slid into his hair and tugged soap through the dark strands.
He sagged against her though she could feel the strain in his muscles as he kept from leaning too heavily. Always thinking of her. Always.
An appreciative hum rumbled against her neck as his head dropped to give her easier access. And she was grateful, the stretch was not uncomfortable but it was significant and it made it easier for her fingers to gently scratch his scalp.
After a long moment, his hands rested gently at her hips and she knew his strength was almost gone.
He swayed dazedly and lifted his head, dark eyes filled with relieved affection, before dropping his forehead gently to hers.
"Okay, let's get you to bed."
"Stay?" he asked, voice low and hesitant, eyes drooping.
As if she would be anywhere else right now. "Wild horses, Lucifer. Wild horses."
Once she'd helped to towel dry his rosy clean skin, he had no concern for his state of undress and dazedly shuffled toward his indulgently large, plush bed. Tired, disoriented and pliable, he slid easily between the sheets and was asleep before his head hit the pillow.
With her heart in her throat, Chloe pulled the soft covers up to his shoulders. Love and affection bloomed in her red-rimmed eyes as she settled at his side to watch over him while he slept.
She dozed herself until the loud ring of her cell phone sent her scrambling from the bed, concerned it would wake her exhausted partner. She snatched it out of her discarded jeans and hurried out to the balcony.
"Hi Monkey."
She settled into a lounge chair beside the covered hot tub, smiling at the sound her little girl's voice.
"How's Lucifer?"
"He's doing ok. Sleeping." She leaned her head back, closed her eyes. Let her daughter's relaxing voice wash away some of the tension of the day.
"How are you, Monkey?"
"Fine."
"You sure?"
"Yep."
"Put your dad on." Chloe knew how good her daughter was at hiding her feelings.
"He's out helping Ella. She's kinda – in shock. I'm babysitting Charlie."
So much to unpack in that short sentence but Chloe chose to address the largest concern first. "Not alone, I hope."
"Nope. Linda and Amenadiel are here."
"Okay. Good." She hesitated for a moment. She didn't want to bring up Maze over the phone so she waited to see if Trixie would mention it.
She didn't.
They spoke for a while longer with a promise to call back in a few hours to provide an update on Lucifer.
The day passed in a blur, with Chloe returning to the bedroom to watch over her unconscious devil and every few hours speaking to Trixie to give her an update – which really wasn't much of one as Lucifer continued to sleep.
She thanked Dan for taking Trixie and he grudgingly accepted the reasoning, not at all wanting to hear about her feelings for the fallen angel but understanding enough to allow her the space to figure it out. They really were better as friends.
As the sunset turned the clear Los Angeles skyline into swirling hues of red and pink, Chloe grew worried. It had been ten hours without so much as a move or snore out of Lucifer.
A mere moment after her call to Amenadiel, he landed on the balcony, wings WHOOSHING out of existence as he strode into the spacious living room, eyes wide with concern.
"There's been no change?"
He didn't wait for her to answer before he strode into the bedroom and flattened a hand atop his sleeping brother's forehead.
"I'm worried."
"He looks fine. But – I admit I don't have experience with the recovery time needed after," he stumbled over the words, "severing ones wings."
Silence fell as she whispered a pained, "Yeah. Me either."
Without another word, he led her out of the bedroom and toward the elevator.
"I'll watch over him. Linda will be waiting for you downstairs. "
The abrupt subject change threw her for a moment.
"Go for a walk, get some dinner. I won't leave his side."
Chloe glanced back at the lump she could see buried beneath the bedcovers and hesitated. She wanted to be here if he woke. Didn't want him to think she'd abandoned him.
But as if he could read her mind – and she really hadn't gotten around to asking if that was a skill angels possessed, Amenadiel assured, "I'll call you if he wakes."
He didn't give her a choice as he pushed her into the open elevator doors. "I promise."
Chloe decided the forced conversation with Linda was a godsend the moment they settled into a little hole in the wall Mexican place near Lux that served the best home made mole Chloe had ever eaten.
"How are you doing?" Linda asked after she'd checked on Charlie, sound asleep in his stroller.
Chloe had never been to a therapist. Not really. Excepting those times Lucifer had dragged her with him for one absurd reason or another.
"I don't know how to even begin to-," Chloe trailed off, feeling strung out without the benefit of the preceding high.
"What can I do?"
She rubbed her hands over her face. "I don't know."
Chloe was grateful when Linda slightly changed the subject. "Trixie seems to have taken everything in stride."
Her short burst of laughter was loud even to Chloe's ears. "She believed him all along. From the moment they met."
"Children, when young, process everything adults say as fact so it's not surprising."
"Yeah." Chloe watched her friend carefully. "I need to talk to her about Maze. They're close and – what she saw -"
"It hasn't come up."
Chloe wasn't sure if that was good or bad. Her little girl was good at hiding her feelings.
"Ella on the other hand…"
The guilt at abandoning her friend just as she was slapped in the face with literal proof of her faith tugged at Chloe's battered heart. "Is she ok?"
"Her brain melted a bit, as expected. But yes. She'll be okay. Lot of air clearing as we cleaned."
Cleaned. Blood. Lucifer's blood. All over the precinct floor. She should have been there. Helping her friends. Something else came to mind. Something she'd only learned recently.
"How did – I thought when Amenadiel stopped time, it affected all humans. Do you know why-"
"We talked about that, actually. He theorized that subconsciously he knew he and Lucifer were outnumbered and would need help. So he - self-actualized that help. Similar to how his fears about Charlie being mortal enabled him to completely stop time rather than just slow it."
"Against invulnerable angels?" Chloe laughed lowly. "Us?"
"I pointed out that waking us up would more likely to get us all killed." Linda said matter-of-factly and Chloe couldn't bring herself to disagree. It had almost gotten one of them killed. Her daughter. "He was - upset ."
But Linda's calm reassurance interrupted the guilt-laden rabbit hole she could easily have spiraled into when led to focus on what could have been. " Anyway, you were where you needed to be. Ella will be fine."
"And Dan?" Chloe inquired with a wince. He hadn't taken the revelation well. At all. "He – didn't take it well."
Linda huffed a short laugh, as if she knew Dan had tried to shoot Lucifer. "He's doing fine. I think Trixie's complete acceptance has helped with that."
The conversation turned to safer, less stressful topics that relieved the crushing tension from Chloe's shoulders.
Chloe returned to the opulent penthouse in better spirits than when she'd left. Not exactly relaxed but lighter than she'd felt since waking up in Lucifer's ridiculously large, plush bed to a sweet, smug smile and pleasant ache in all the right places.
She was grateful for the conversation that didn't just focus on the topic of the moment and Professional Linda had stepped aside so Friend Linda could have her moment to shine. She had listened with more understanding than Chloe probably gave her credit for as she raged about Michael. Lucifer's twin brother. An angel. Who had manipulated other celestial siblings to follow him to earth to force their rebellious brother back to Hell.
By any means necessary.
No one in their right mind would believe this was her life now. She barely believed it herself.
Dinner and a walk had given her the chance to sooth her simmering rage. She was grateful Linda and Amenadiel had given her the opportunity.
But she was ready to resume her vigil at Lucifer's side.
So when the elevator doors swung open, she didn't expect to see Amenadiel standing at the top of the steps that led into the bedroom, a guardian angel in every sense of the word, arms crossed and staring down – Maze.
Memories shot like rapid fire through her head.
Maze hurling her deadly-to-angels demon knives straight at Lucifer. Him snatching them out of thin air in a move so quick no human could have replicated it. A flash of wings and an agonized cry as one of those blades sank deep into his back.
Chloe hurried off the elevator and crossed the distance that separated them quickly.
Before she had the chance to speak, Maze waved a dismissive hand. "I'm not here to hurt him."
The admission did little to calm her racing heart. "Then why are you here?" She immediately regretted the accusatory tone. But not the words.
Maze was coiled tight as a snake on the cusp of striking an unsuspecting prey but replied with a surprisingly even, "I heard what happened. I wanted to make sure he was ok."
"He'll be fine," came a tone from the top of the steps that invited no argument.
Chloe's eyes shifted from Amenadiel's protective position to a disadvantaged, if not apologetic, Maze. In that moment, she knew that God's Firstborn would be moved for no one in protection of his Fallen brother.
Maze's lip curled in haughty dismissal. "Have you ever -"
"I had to do it, Maze." Amenadiel descended a few steps, looking every bit a Celestial Soldier advancing on his prey. The anguish in his voice renewed Chloe's heartache. "Cutting away divinity may be something you've perfected over the millennia, but for me-"
"Right," she interrupted with a shake of her head, taking the chastisement in stride. "There was no one else."
"That's right." Amenadiel confirmed and slowly added, "Because you betrayed him."
With an unconcerned roll of her shoulders, her blasé retort unsuccessfully masked the flicker of shame that crossed her face. "It's what we do."
"It doesn't have to be," Chloe stepped in, hoping her forced neutral expression looked natural.
Hurt slithered along her raw nerves when Maze ignored her. "Looks like you've got things handled here so I'll just," she gestured at the open elevator doors, "go."
"Maze," Chloe started forward but stopped as the demon raised a hand. She ignored Maze and pressed ahead anyway. "He's been unconscious for over ten hours. Is that – what happened before?"
Chloe watched a myriad of expressions cross Maze' face until they settled on, "No."
Her heart plummeted into her stomach. This wasn't normal. She knew it!
"He'll heal quicker if you're not around, Decker." The accusatory tone was biting.
Her response was immediate. Defensive. "I don't make him vulnerable anymore, Maze."
An indistinguishable emotion flickered briefly in Maze' eyes before she whirled on her heel and strode into the open elevator.
"Good," echoed in the space as the doors closed.
Chloe scrubbed her hands across her face.
Amenadiel descended the last two steps and was at her side in a heartbeat. "His divinity is still intact."
She was too mentally and physically exhausted to even bother with trying to understand. "I don't even know what that means."
He offered her a patient smile. And she felt like a child being given information only an adult would understand. Human comprehension of the divine was limited, after all. "It means he'll be fine. He's had more than one trauma today. It will just take time."
Her relaxed buzz after talking with Linda vanished. "Yeah."
His calm concern weighed heavily where it should have been a relief. "Are you? Okay?"
"Yeah. I'm –" She risked a look into the bedroom and exhaled a heavy sigh. "I'll be okay."
"I can stay."
She really, really just wanted to curl into Lucifer's side and sleep for the rest of the night. "No. No. I'll call you in the morning."
Grateful that he accepted her response without argument, she walked him to the elevator. "Thank you."
"My pleasure, Chloe. Get some rest."
With those final parting words he was gone and she sluggishly made her way back to the bedroom.
After rummaging in his closet for a shirt, she took a long moment to enjoy the slide of the soft, expensive fabric on her skin. So gentle and light, like one of his warm, full-mouthed kisses. Because that was a thing that she could freely enjoy now. That they could enjoy together.
She slipped into bed and curled around him like a jellyfish, determined to wake as soon as he so much as moved.
A wet warmth crept along Chloe's neck, slowly drawing her out of her comfortable, sleepy haze. Goosebumps skittered across her abdomen and she exhaled a soft sigh as her eyes popped open.
A bright-eyed Lucifer lay pressed against her back, lips fluttering down her skin while one hand crept under her shirt to continue its gentle exploration.
A contented sigh slipped out but she resisted the urge to lean into him and let him have his way. Instead, she rolled over and with a relieved smile took in his surprisingly relaxed demeanor and dark, questioning eyes.
"You're ok," she breathed, her hands coming up to frame his whiskered cheeks.
He huffed an amused, "Of course I am. Immortal, remember?" and slid a hand beneath the shirt she still wore, eyes slipping appreciatively over where it parted at the neck to reveal pale, creamy skin.
With a disbelieving purse of her lips, she pushed herself up on an elbow to gaze down at him. A short battle of wills ensued until he finally sighed dramatically and gave up his explorations, unable to mask the slight wince as his back hit the mattress when he rolled over.
Her heart clenched. "I saw that."
He just shrugged and she forced herself not to dwell on the thought that he felt so unworthy of care that such a dismissive reaction was his immediate default.
"I'll be right as rain in no time, Detective."
"And until then?"
His eyes swept down her body and she felt her skin flush from the unabashed appraisal. When he leaned forward, his breath was hot against her cheek. "Plenty of other distractions to be had."
She closed her eyes and flattened her hands in the center of his chest. It wasn't that she didn't want to have sex with him. She did. Even more so now that she'd had an all too brief introduction to those incredible skills he'd always bragged about. But now was not the time. And the look on her face must have made that quite clear to him, too, because with a heavy sigh, he rolled to the other side of the bed and stood.
Instantly, her eyes were drawn to the wing-shaped scars on his back. Exactly like the ones she'd seen not too long after she met him. Before she'd Believed. He'd actually prevented her from touching them then, face awash with a surprised, defensive longing that made her heart ache.
He stalked out onto the balcony and she heaved a huge sigh, pushed herself up and followed him. Allowing him to spiral into an emotionally misunderstood rejection wouldn't help this situation. Though, she didn't want to push him to talk if he didn't want to. She just - wanted to be there for him if he did. An encouraging presence for him to lean on, confide in. Because that's what they did now. With a reflective smile, she realized, that's what they'd always done.
He'd left the sliding door open, which was encouraging. Though, she'd have followed him even if he'd closed it. She found him reclining on a long lounge chair not far from the covered hot tub, pulling in a long, contented drag from a cigarette.
His eyes tracked her as she approached and while she didn't want to trample on any lingering insecurities or anger as a result of yesterdays events, she didn't want to leave him to wallow either.
"Can I join you?" She asked softly, a little afraid of rejection herself. Simply seeing him upright and awake did thrilling things to her insides.
His eyes swept down her body and back again and she could see him struggle with an innuendo-laden response. After a long moment, he switched the cigarette to his other hand and opened his arm in invitation.
She smothered a relieved sigh as he took her hand and helped her settle onto the plush cushion to recline at his side.
"I'm fine," he said with a deep drag from the cigarette.
She nuzzled her nose into his bare chest. "I know."
He dropped the cigarette onto the side table and wrapped his long arms around her. She snuggled close, the heat from his bare skin and the thud of his heart against her cheek a balm to frayed nerves.
"I just – want to be here if that changes."
"This isn't the first time I've lost my wings, Detective." His nonchalant response came as no surprise but she could feel the tension in every line of his body.
She knew it hurt. Despite all his protestations to the opposite, he wanted to be loved. He wanted to be accepted. Not just by his father, but by his siblings as well. And they'd done nothing but hurt him.
But he'd have to come to that realization himself. She could only lead the stubborn mule to the water. He was literally an immoveable force that she could never push to drink from the unfathomably deep waters of emotional vulnerability unless he was willing to take that step.
So she simply wrapped herself around him like a soft blanket, questing hands careful to avoid his raw back and drew his head down to pillow on her chest.
He exhaled a long, low hum of appreciation as her fingers slipped into his hair and began to tug gently at the soft strands. She felt him relax under her ministrations and leaned down to press a kiss to his forehead.
"I love you," she whispered, as one finger slipped down his whispered cheek to touch his mouth. "And I'm here."
His head shifted slightly from its comfortable pillow on her breasts so he could look up at her, eyes hopeful and expressive. Rage simmered beneath her very skin at how deeply he had been starved for even the barest of meaningful affection. It made her desperate to give him all the good in the world and make him forget all the bad that had come before.
She offered him a warm, assuring smile and bent to nuzzle her cheek against his. "I'm here," she repeated and returned her fingers to his hair.
He relaxed into her softness with a soft, rumbling hum. "I know."
Chloe woke as a shadow fell across where she and Lucifer lay wrapped together in the afternoon sun and rapidly blinked the sleep from her eyes.
Lucifer was still out with his head pillowed on her chest and her fingers twitched in his hair as she watched Maze stare impassively down at them. The estranged demon stood with her hips canted defensively and Chloe could see a myriad of emotion flicker in her eyes.
Chloe felt a slight twinge of pity as Maze's eyes zeroed in on the wing-shaped scars on Lucifer's back.
"Relax," Maze said sharply, tone defensive. "I'm not here to hurt him."
Chloe could feel his body tense but she tightened her fingers in his hair, hoping that he would remain where he was until Maze spoke her peace.
She could see the moment Maze reconsidered her olive leaf and backtracked. "Not that a human could stop me if I wanted to."
"But I would." Lucifer's attention shifted wholly toward Maze and while she couldn't see the look he leveled at the demon, she could feel the bunch of his muscle moments before he slid gracefully out of her arms.
Chloe watched as he pulled himself to his full, imposing height, ready to neutralize the unfortunate threat.
TBC
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