You Don't Know What You Got till You Lose It

by castlefan6

This is an AU story, Kate has complained about Castle so much, the Mayor has heard of another precinct with a backlog of unsolved cases, what happens when he starts working with another female detective, out of her control. Time Frame Season 2 during Deming Arc. NOT A CASKETT ENDING

You Don't Know What You`ve Got (Until You Lose It)

By: Castlefan6

This is an AU story, Kate has complained about Castle so much, the Mayor has heard of another precinct with a backlog of unsolved cases, what happens when he starts working with another female detective, out of her control. Time Frame Season 2 during Deming Arc. THIS IS NOT A CASKETT ENDING

**************************************************************************/

REWORKED AND REPOSTING FROM AN EARLIER PUBLICATION LAST YEAR UNDER A DIFFERENT PEN NAME

CAUTION: IF YOU ARE A CASKETT FAN OR ONLY READ HAPPY GET TOGETHER FICS THIS ONE IS NOT FOR YOU, IT IS NOT CASKETT, THERE IS NO TWIST TO BRING THEM TOGETHER AT THE LAST MINUTE, SO YOU ARE WARNED.

This is AU, timeline may be adjusted to fit the storyline,

By now, everyone knows no one owns any right to the characters and stories of Castle; All are used just for entertainment except for those I create.

Chapter 1

Captain Montgomery had heard the chatter from his lead detective and the new robbery detective working with Homicide for one case and wasn't thrilled in the least. He had noted on his calendar to call Beckett in after his next meeting to have a word with her. He shouldn't have to remind her of her obligation as LEAD detective, to ensure all who work felt safe and would offer input without fear of reprisal or scorn.

His phone rang, glancing down at the caller ID to decide to ignore it or take the call he noticed the Mayor's ID pop up. Shit, just what he needed, an ass-chewing with all he's got going on, the mayor never called with good news or great job messages, oh well.

"Yes Mr. Mayor, how can I help you" he answered,

"Hey Roy, glad I caught you, and not your voice mail, I'm sitting here with Commissioner Boyle and it looks like your homicide team has kicked some ass over the last several weeks. You're number one in closure rates for the fourth week in a row." Mayor Bob Weldon said,

"Thanks, Bob, but you and I both know you don't call me, at least with just congratulations. I'm sorry Commissioner, it's just that Mr. Mayor and I have past history. Sometimes I forget he's made it all the way to the Mayor's office." Roy smiled into the phone,

"No offense Roy, I understand that you, he, and your newest civilian consultant go back a long way, and have, well shall we say shared experiences. Bob's got an idea he wants to run by you, he and I have talked, and I think it's a good idea. I'd like for you to listen to him, and without getting his ego any bigger than it is already, see if you agree." Commissioner, Frank Boyle said.

"Understood Sir, I'll see what I can do, so what's on your mind Bob, somehow I have a feeling this is going to cost me, and give you some gain, that's how your ideas usually go" he smiled into the phone,

"Now Roy, that hurt, of course, it will be for the good of all our city, not just those citizens covered by the 12th precinct. You probably know that we're having issues at the 18th precinct, Captain Vance is just marking time till he retires in 5 months, and the unsolved homicides are stacking up.

"The lead detective there, Detective Karen Pedersen is good Roy, maybe as good as your Detective Beckett, but she's growing frustrated with the lack of support. Rumor has it she's looking to go outside NYPD if she can't get some help quickly." He said,

"Yeah Bob, it's no secret about Vance, he's got so much time built up but the SOB won't think of taking early retirement, they say his wife won't let him, not sure how valid that is. I've heard of Pedersen, she's a looker if I recall and I'm thinking of the same detective. From what I've seen and heard, mostly heard, she's a damn good cop."

"You got the right one, Roy, she's good looking and well between us boys, built like a brick shithouse, but is totally dedicated to the job. She's got three cases right now that she needs someone to help her on, and if I can get her help, I know she'll stay, if not, I think the 18th is going to be further behind every other precinct." Boyle said

"Yeah, as a cop, we both know what it's like to have to try to solve cases with no backup, so what is Mr. Mayor's plan to help her out?" Roy asked,

"Roy, I'm glad you asked, it's no secret to anyone within the entire NYPD that Beckett doesn't want Castle around, so he's gone, effective today. I want to get him over to Detective Pedersen to see if they can forge a partnership, you and I both know he's the reason your closure rate went up, he thinks out of the box. I want to talk to Rick with you if you buy into this to explain the situation.

"I've already spoken to Detective Pedersen and she would welcome Rick with open arms, she needs help she told me and she didn't care where it came from. She knows the icy reception Rick has received from Beckett and promised me and Frank both, it wouldn't happen there."

"It sounds like you win, and I lose as usual but you're not wrong Bob, I think the only one not giving Castle the proper credit is Beckett, perhaps if we take her help away and hold her to the same closure rate, she will realize how much he does add. One thing, does Detective Pedersen know who the new civilian would be yet? How does she feel about working with a writer?"

"That's the nice part of this setup, and I have to give him credit Roy, it was Bob's idea, we would transfer Pedersen to the 12th, only on paper, meaning she would report to you, but still work in her own precinct. No one has to know but you, Vance, and Castle. He would still be under your guidance, Pedersen would be a new report for everything but the HR issues, so we can make adjustments as needed to your logistic reporting. The answer to both your questions is yes, although Pedersen hasn't read any of his books, so he's just a writer coming to help." Commissioner Boyle replied.

"Well, that makes losing Rick a lot easier to take Sir, I mean as you said, we all know the closures went up once he started working with the team, let's see if he will go along with the new arrangement. The story I'm giving Beckett and her team is that his book is due, he won't be back till after it's released. I think he's in now, let me see if I can get him in here to go over the changes."

"Call us back on Bob's private number once you round him up and are ready to discuss, and Roy, this stays between us, no one other than Castle and Pedersen knows the arrangement. If anyone asks simply say he's working on his book, and won't be back until it is released."

"I'll call you back shortly, Sir" Roy ended the call and walked out of his office to hear another exchange between Beckett and Castle, he hadn't heard the beginning of the conversation, but the words "You can watch, Castle" sent a shiver up his spine. Just as he thought, Castle, Ryan, and Esposito were in the observation room watching Beckett and Deming, the Robbery Detective, and new object of her affection in the interrogation room.

"Why aren't you in there questioning the suspect, you're her partner Rick?" Roy asked

"Well, she told me to watch, apparently I'm not a cop like Deming so she would rather have him by her side," Rick said with a hurtful look on his face.

"Very well, may I see you in my office, I have something to discuss with you", glancing around and looking Esposito square in the eye, "privately, you do know what that means don't you Esposito or should I position and officer in front of my office?"

"Yes Sir, no I mean I understand privacy, sir, no need to station anyone, sir," his face flushed as Ryan hid a chuckle and Rick hopped off the table, their makeshift seating to observe and followed Captain Montgomery into his office. Roy promptly closed and locked the door, and lowered the privacy blinds.

"What the hell do you think that's about?" Espo asked Kevin

"Well, I have no clue but unless if you want to earn your way back to uniforms again, I'd forget all about it," Ryan answered,

"I know but you have to admit it's strange, Captain asking Castle why he wasn't in the interrogation, and then calling a meeting, he didn't look happy." Espo offered,

"No, he didn't but he'll be even less happy if you keep trying to figure out what he clearly has identified as a private meeting, forget it Javi before you get us both in trouble." Kevin snapped

Rick looked over at his old friend, and said, "OK Roy, what's up, and don't try to sugar coat it. I can guess, Beckett has gone to HR and filed a complaint and wants me gone from her team. The last six weeks, all it's been is Deming, Deming, Deming, she won't even listen to anyone else, not even her team." His voice echoed his disappointment.

"Well, there is a change coming, well if you agree, but Beckett had nothing to do with it. I will be speaking to her; I caught the last fragments of conversations over the last few weeks and I'm not happy with her performance. What she does on her personal time, I give a rat's ass about but when she lets it spill over to my house that's a different story." Roy said, fire in his voice

"Roy, let it go, it's not a big deal to me, I mean she's got the hots for the good-looking Robbery Detective, let it go," Rick said quietly

"Well, I would Rick if that were all there was to it, but it's leaked all the way up to Boyle and Mr. Mayor about some of her comments, and well, eh, I'll let them explain the request to you. Are you up for a conference call?"

"Sure, but don't make a big deal I mean I don't want to cause her any problems," Rick said

"You're not, like you said she won't even listen to her team members, so it won't be long until they will be requesting transfers then I'll have to explain why I let it happen, no, I'm nipping this today, here and now," as he dialed Bob Weldon's private number.

"Hey Roy, did you explain things to Rick, or did you leave that to me?" Bob Weldon asked?

"Well since the Commissioner said it was your idea, I thought we would let you take full credit for it, sir," as Rick and Roy both laughed. Roy calling Bob sir was a slap to when they were all in the Air Force together and Roy was the Captain, Rick, and Bob his reports.

"OK Roy, you won that one, but never forget I'll get even for it, as always" Roy rolled his eyes as Rick smiled.

The Mayor laid out the request, why, and also that Commissioner Boyle had instructed Roy to remind Beckett what her job was, and that she was being held to the same closure rate projections, with or without the writer. He went on to explain basic details about Detective Pedersen, her cases, and how she was crying for help. Bob Weldon couldn't help but throw in the fact that she hadn't read any of his books.

After they had explained details of the request, Rick still would be assigned to Roy, but working with Detective Pedersen at the 18th precinct physically until further notice and wouldn't return to the 12th precinct unless he wished and it was discussed beforehand, depending on how the partnership worked out with Detective Pedersen.

"What do you say, Rick, change of scenery, still helping your city, and two old friends who saved your ass more than once, if I recall," Bob Weldon said,

"Well Bob, we won't go into who saved whose ass, but yeah that does sound good, I just don't want to walk into another situation as I did here. I know I have thick skin, but lately, even I have grown tired of being put down, I hope Detective Pedersen is different." He lamented,

"Rick, she sent me an email a few minutes ago, I'll forward it to you, but don't tell her I did. She's already got the best chair and desk lined up next to hers, they ordered you a new chair and floor mat, should be there this afternoon, and also ordered more coffee. I approved the expenses since she is charging them to the 12th, and didn't know Roy yet." He laughed, as Roy frowned another expense to his bottom line.

"Well, it all sounds good to me, so when do they want me over there?" Rick asked,

All three answered at the same time "Now/Yesterday/Within the hour" as Rick started laughing.

"OK I'll grab my bag and get out of here; the boys are out to lunch and I doubt Beckett will even know I'm gone for a week. Roy when she and her boy toy get through chasing their tails on this case, bring in the husband of the victim's female spy partner.

"I think there was more going on than coupon clipping, but you can ask Ryan why Beckett ignored the fact the victim paid for the wife's vacation when he paid for his. Sounds like the husband did a little spying on his own, also a quick database check shows he owns a dark sedan and a Glock handgun."

"She had these facts from Detective Ryan and didn't check them out?" Roy asked,

"Kevin offered them to her, but Deming had another idea so they were pursuing that as primary. He targeted his business partner because of a huge life insurance, but that's common for partnerships to do to avoid having to sell the business if something happens to one of the principals. It just doesn't fit." Rick replied,

"Thanks, Rick, you're right that's SOP for partnerships, Damn fool Deming," Roy was shaking his head with a disgusted look on his face.

"What should I say if they call me wondering where I am, or why I'm not coming in? It doesn't matter to me, but I want us all to be on the same page." Rick asked,

"Tell them to see me, you have personal business to take care of, nothing more. I'll handle things here. If scuttlebutt travels as fast as I think it does, Esposito will know where you're at by tomorrow afternoon and be broadcasting it, another thing I need to get under control. How the hell he ever made special forces I'll never know; he can't keep his mouth shut to save his life." Roy huffed

"Thanks, Roy, I'll be talking to you, I'm going to get out of here before they all get back. Romeo and Juliet left for the Chinese restaurant a few minutes ago, I heard her laugh as they walked by and confirmed Chans was good for lunch." He said, trying to make a joke, but Roy knew his friend was hurting.

Rick grabbed his bag, and without a word or look back he headed for the elevators, then decided to take the stairs and get to the 18th as soon as he could.

25 Minutes Later

18th Precinct

Rick arrived outside the 18th Precinct, some 30 blocks north of the 12th, and approached the entrance a little sheepishly, was this a good idea or not? Oh well too late now, he had agreed to help two of his best friends. Roy and Bob had gone out of their way to make the change easy on him. Actually, he was closer and more centrally located to both Black Pawn and some of his favorite restaurants here.

He approached the desk Sargent and started to explain who he was and who he was there to see,

"Mr. Castle?" the Sargent asked

"That's me" as Rick provided his photo ID and a copy of his civilian badge from the 12th.

"Nice to see you, sir, I'm Ralph Pitts, eh Sargent Pitts, go to the elevators and take them to the 4th floor, turn right and you'll see Karen's, eh I mean Detective Pedersen's desk. She's expecting you, sir. Welcome and thank you for the help"

"Thanks, Sargent, I appreciate the help and the warm welcome" Rick responded,

"Anytime sir, the wife is a huge fan, she couldn't believe me when I told her you would be here for a little while," He said with a big smile,

"Well Ralph, call me Rick or Castle, and if your wife would like her books signed, just have her come down when I'm going to be here, I'm always thrilled to meet my fans." He smiled,

"Really? I'll see when she can come down, and Thanks Rick, she's going to forgive me for a whole lot of missed special days if she can meet you" Rick laughed with him.

As soon as he stepped off the elevators, he noticed the difference in the two precincts, people were just milling around talking, it didn't look like a lot of work was getting done. He turned to the right, and there she was, he almost lost his breath.

A beautiful lady, built like a model who would pay extra for her natural beauty, sporting a pink top that brought out the tan of the arms, beautiful black hair just past her shoulders, as she turned to look, he could see she was on the phone and smiling, God what a beautiful smile. He approached slowly until she waved him closer,

She smiled again and said, "I have to go Mom, my guest is here, I'll talk to you later, yes Mom, I promise I'll eat, Goodbye"

"Hi I'm Karen Pedersen, and you're Mr. Rick Castle, glad to see you. I can't tell you how much it means to have you helping out on a couple of cases." As she extended her hand, Rick took it and shook it gently, God she was beautiful, focus Rick, focus.

"You're right on the first guess, please call me Rick or Castle, the Mr. part makes me feel so old." He said with a smile,

She laughed, "far from it Rick, you're just what the doctor ordered. I took the liberty of setting up a desk next to mine, I'm sorry your chair isn't here yet but should be by the end of the day. If you need anything, at all, just ask, and please call me Karen, I'm only a few years younger than you so I know what you mean. I hate when the grocery boy calls me Mam" as they both laugh, off to a wonderful start.

The elevator dinged and off came a delivery man accompanied by Sargent Pitts, "Rick, this guy said you ordered something for our break room?"

"Thanks, Ralph, yes I did, would you show us where you make your coffee Karen, I ordered the same machine I furnished the 12th, figuring the coffee would taste about as bad regardless of which station I went to." He said as she looked on with a puzzled look on her face,

"Right this way, Rick you shouldn't have I saw these things and they are expensive as hell; I mean Thank You; I do love my coffee." She gushed,

"I know you take it with two creams and one sweet and low not Splenda you hate that, so I had them bring a case for you to store for your personal use." He smiled as her mouth flew open,

"How, I mean, we just met, you can't google this stuff," She said as her face broke into the most beautiful smile,

"I'm a writer, I'm supposed to find out things. It's going to take this gentleman about an hour to get this all set up and I heard you promise your Mom you would eat; may I take you to lunch and get acquainted over a meal? He smiled at her; he was more relaxed in five minutes with Karen than he had been in months with Kate.

"Sure, I have to show you the spots to keep you from getting food poisoning, let's go Rick" and she smiled back as he placed his hand in the small of her back, always the gentleman. This could work out good for everyone, maybe Bob finally got one right.

Chapter 2

12th Precinct

Two Hours Later

Kate and Tom had just gotten back from a rather long lunch hour, actually, it was almost two hours and she was over one hour late getting back. Usually, Captain Montgomery didn't say a word, since she put so many hours in each week, but today he seemed a bit upset. When they arrived at her desk still laughing at their own inside joke, they were jolted back into reality by the booming voice of Montgomery,

"Nice of you to show up, even if you're over an hour late. Demming, does your lead know where you're at or what you're doing on the homicide floor?"

"Sir, yes sir. I am assisting Detective Beckett with her case, sir." He replied,

"Bullshit Deming that case closed 5 weeks ago, although you still haven't filed your part of the report for the burglary. Any reason for that, other than it allows you to still be on this floor disrupting my homicide team? You are a Robbery Detective, not Homicide, stay on your floor and if you ever lie to me again, you'll be riding midnights with the scratchy wool uniforms. Now get the hell off this floor and stay off it unless I send for you." Roy boomed so loud the entire bullpen heard him. It was rare that Roy lost his temper but when he did, it was ugly.

"Beckett, get your team, the case notes for this spy venture, and your latest clues and meet me in my office in 5 minutes," as he headed off to the break room. Roy and Castle were two of the individuals who could operate that damn fancy coffee machine anyway they wanted, others, especially Kate usually burned themselves, more than get coffee.

Five minutes later Roy returned with a travel-size mug of hot coffee, silently he opened his drawer, opened a flask, and poured a healthy amount into the cup, and replaced the lid. Just as he finished, Kate knocked on his door,

"Enter," he said,

"Sir we have the case notes and information you wanted to review," Kate said quietly

"Good, let's see what you have, and where you plan on going with this case," Roy said,

"Well Sir, I originally went down the wrong path, I agreed with Tom, I mean Detective Deming that the partner was involved because of his bankruptcy and the large insurance policy he held on the victim, but after reviewing what Castle and Kevin presented, I think Castle is right.

"I know it would take a hell of a lot of coupons to clip to pay $10,000 for a vacation, so when Kevin showed me the duplicate payments, I had him check it out, it was verified that the deceased paid for the wife's vacation.

"Her husband has just been picked up, he owns a dark sedan and is a registered owner of a Glock of the same caliber, and the damage to his car matches that from our crime scene. He said he was ready to make a statement sir, so hopefully, we can close this case within the next few hours."

"Ryan, Esposito, do you agree with Detective Beckett? I know you had furnished the financials to her a few days ago and the notion was rejected, why the change of heart?"

"I agree with the assessment Sir," Ryan said, "As do I Sir" Espo offered,

"Well sir, with Deming having fresh eyes I thought I would pursue that lead first but it didn't take long to prove to have no merit or factor in the case," Kate said,

"Is that when you went back to the course suggested by Castle and verified by the financials provided by Detective Ryan last week?" Roy asked, in his deepest voice, everyone could tell he was struggling not to lose his temper.

"Yes, Sir we went back to that avenue, we were working several in parallel and I really thought the murder to clear bankruptcy with the insurance proceeds was a better call than a jealous husband at first, but Castle was right. By the way, sir did he say anything to you, I looked for him and was told he left shortly after I did for lunch." She didn't offer the fact that Espo had told her of the Captain's meeting with Rick, or the foul mood he already was in at that time.

"We'll discuss that in a moment Kate, Esposito, Ryan anything else to offer? If not get the husband in the box and get a confession from him, let's put this one to rest." Roy barked,

"Sir, yes Sir" they echoed as they stood and walked out the door, Beckett began to rise,

"Hold on Detective Beckett, we have to talk about somethings."

Roy walked behind the two as they exited, and closed and locked the door, he left the blinds open as was protocol when a superior officer was having a private meeting with a female subordinate.

"OK Kate, why don't you tell me what's been going on for the last several weeks. I've overheard bits of conversations between you and Castle that, well frankly I was surprised and disappointed in. You realize as the LEAD detective it's your job to ensure that every team member, paid or unpaid, regardless of rank can offer input in a non-threatening environment.

"I've heard you allow Deming and Esposito to mock theories suggested by Castle, and not in the same way you used to do, these were vicious. You didn't stop it, and unfortunately, it worked its way all the way up to the Commissioner's office.

"I don't know how, I much would have rather handled it in house than going up the ladder, but it's done and you have a letter of reprimand in your file by order of the Commissioner. It will stay for one year, if there are no further complaints, it will be removed, and no further damage done to your career.

"For the next year you're frozen in pay and rank, while you work yourself out of this, and Kate, Castle tried to talk Boyle out of this, but he wouldn't hear it. Someone up the ladder really has it in for you, so watch your back." Roy said, still pissed off.

"A letter of reprimand Sir? All this time on the force not so much as a verbal warning and all of a sudden, I receive a formal letter of reprimand? Do you think that's fair Roy?" Kate asked her mentor obviously shook up,

"It really doesn't matter what I think, you see, I got a note of reprimand in my file as well, not as bad as a letter, but not something I wanted to have this close to retirement, it could impact my benefits," Roy said sadly,

"Why Sir, what did you do?" Kate asked,

"It was what I didn't do Kate, control you, when your directs were not treated properly, and yes a note is bad, but it was deserved in this case." He said,

"I'm so sorry Sir, I never meant for this to blowback on you, I never thought I guess that I wasn't protecting Castle, I mean, he's Castle, we always rag on him." She whined an excuse,

"Kate your team dynamics poking at one another is one thing, it's another when your boyfriend comes up and tries to mark his territory, namely you, in front of a rich and powerful man. The irony was that Castle was always two steps ahead of Deming, yet you let your heart rule your brain, at least that's what it looked like up the ladder to the brass." Roy said in a matter of fact tone,

"Sir, did you talk to Rick, I mean he's gone for the day, did he say anything?"

"Actually Kate, Rick's gone from the 12th until at least his book is published and he completes his book tour."

"Sir? That could be months sir, you mean he left without saying goodbye?" She almost fainted,

"He said goodbye to those that were here Kate, he always said he had a real job and had to meet his contractual agreements, so for now, your team is going to have to buckle down. The Commissioner said that one metric you would be judged on was the same or improved closure rate to remove your letter, how the hell you're going to do that without Castle I haven't a clue but Good Luck Kate, Dismissed"

He had lowered his head back to his desk, taking a good long sip of his coffee, letting her know the discussion was over. A numb and shocked Kate Beckett made her way back to her desk on autopilot. The boys were around her in a flash,

"Kate, what's the matter, how much trouble are you in? Ryan asked,

"It's not that Kevin, I got a formal letter of reprimand in my file, Roy got a note of corrective action but the worst, the worst, Castle's gone." She got out quietly,

"Gone, what do you mean gone Kate, he'll be back tomorrow, he just got his feathers ruffled, he'll be back, just wait." Espo offered,

"No, no he won't, he said goodbye to everyone that was here and left until after the book is done, published and his first book tour, that could be a year Javi, so don't say he'll be back, he won't."

"Why did you get a letter of reprimand Kate, on what grounds? You can fight this, just because Castle knows the Mayor, we have representation" Espo said,

"Javi it came from Boyle, Rick asked him not to, I guess Roy got the corrective action note because of me, I didn't control Deming and you Javi, yes you, took cheap shots that were heard and reported up the ladder not even going to Roy. Someone other than Castle actually went up the chain and reported us to Boyle" she said,

"What? We always kid Castle Kate," Javi replied,

"Javi, you and I both know some of the comments, especially by Tom weren't kidding they were said to hurt, and I didn't stop you two, in fact, I may have piled on in some occasions. I deserve what I got, but now Castle is gone and I got Roy in trouble to boot.

"Oh, they want our closure rate to either increase or at a minimum stay the same since Castle wasn't an important part of the team according to the sources. We are going to be burning the oil now, guys, so no one leaves till I say so, understand?"

Two men groaning was heard

XxX

At the 18th

Karen waved at Ralph as she and Rick stepped out into the sunshine, to go to lunch.

"Well, Rick, what do you like, there's just about everything within walking distance or a short cab ride, what do you have a taste for?" Karen asked, her smile still making Rick weak in the knees, she was beautiful, even more, where the light reflected through her hair and off, her golden skin. She was better built than her office suit let on; the side view proved she was stacked in all the right places.

"Well, why don't you choose today, I trust your judgment, and maybe tomorrow will be my pick." He answered, feeling very comfortable with this young lady.

"There's a great burger place, the main one is down near the 12th, but most people don't know this is the brother of the owner of Remy's. I guess the family had a huge falling out, any way Larry argues that his burgers are better." She smiled, figuring he would have been a fan of the cop spot near the 12th.

"You're kidding me right, HOW did I not know this? I love Remy's." Rick said almost like a little boy that earned a giggle from Karen who took his hand and said this way. He waited for her to let go she didn't so he slipped his fingers so they interlaced between hers. He was rewarded with a smile, as she squeezed his hand just a bit tighter.

They walked the two blocks to a clean building with Larry's sign flashing, almost identical to the one at Remy's. When Rick held the door open for Karen, he got a polite "Thank You", not the stare of what are you doing. Once again, his hand guided her gently in the small of her back to a booth near the rear, almost identical to their booth at Remy's, well he considered it theirs, water over the damn as he chased the thoughts from his mind.

"What are you going to order Karen, I am going to put Larry to the test to see whose Cheeseburger is the best" Rick smiled,

"I think I'm going for the Chicken Nuggets; you want to share my fries; I can never eat them all." She asked as if they had been friends for years, not minutes.

"Sure, I'll just run an extra mile or two to burn the calories off tonight" Rick laughed,

"Are you a runner Rick? I run every day, rain or shine, and I can never find anyone with my schedule willing to put in the work" She smiled that smile that made him melt,

"Well now that you said that, I think I'm going to add a shake, care for half of it?" He laughed,

"Depends," she said teasingly.,

"Chocolate" he replied and she burst out laughing "you just lost half your shake, Rick,"

They talked throughout the lunch, about everything it seemed, when Rick mentioned he had a daughter approaching junior year in High School Karen was floored,

"No Way Rick, how old were you when you became a Dad, 15?" she asked,

"He smiled not hardly, but thank you that was sweet, I was 21 Alexis is only 16 but she's advanced and hopes to go to Oxford when she graduates,"

"No Way, she's got to be a Brainiac, to go there, my God I barely got through Columbia," Karen said,

"This may sound forward Karen, so I'm going to apologize then ask anyway, do you have any plans for tonight, I would love to have you over to meet my family and have dinner, we could discuss the cases and your thoughts if you wanted to make it a working session, that is if your boyfriend wouldn't get upset."

"That was smooth, but Rick?" She said, her one eye cocked in such a sexy manner,

"Yes?" he thought he had blown it,

"If you want to know if I have a boyfriend just ask?" she smiled,

"You're going to make me ask aren't you as he smiled back"

"Damn straight" she laughed,

"OK, Karen, do you have a boyfriend or someone who would object to you coming to my home for dinner tonight?"

"No Rick, I don't I'm single as a pringle, and I would love to have dinner at your home tonight, provided I can bring something" She smiled,

"Alexis, my daughter loves Ice Cream,"

"Got it covered Rick, what time and where?"

Rick took her phone and entered his information into it, including his home landline, at the same time she grabbed his and did the same, "hey we're going to be working together, have to be able to get in touch" she smiled, Is 7:00 PM Good Rick?"

"It's perfect, now let's get out of here and get some work done so I won't feel so guilty for taking you away from your job"

They returned to the precinct where Karen brought out a computerized Murder board, one that could retrieve pictures from databases or post evidence that had been entered from various police departments and entered into the central repository. She definitely one-upped Beckett on technology, the speed at which she could update the board was amazing. She saw Rick looking on in awe,

"I minored in Computer Science, thought what the heck why not use both, so I computerized our files and the way the boards were used. It was actually a big cost saving considering the manual labor of the old system." She smiled answering his question before it was asked,

The first case that was tearing her heart out was a newlywed bride, married just 11 days before she was found stabbed to death in her own home. No sign of forced entry, no prints, a lot of nothing as she put it. Rick started to review the case notes, it was from 11 months ago, and something else struck him, the bride looked almost like Karen would if she were in a wedding gown.

"Any reason this would is sticking in your crawl, Karen? I know you've heard it before but this lady could be your double?" Rick said quietly,

"She was a friend from college, and as shy as they come. For her to open her door to anyone Rick, she would have had to know them very well, I mean she had triple locks installed on our apartment when she roomed with me and two other girlfriends the last year I was at Columbia." Karen said, obviously still upset, over the death of her friend as well as her not being able to solve it.

"Were you the original officer on the case Karen? I mean the notes from the file are not what I've seen your quality of work to be" Rick smiled, and for the first time in a long time, he actually blushed, what the hell was happening.

"Were you always this observant Rick? No wonder you have so many bestsellers, I lied, I've read all your books". She paused, then said "I was afraid if Mr. Mayor thought I was a fan he wouldn't allow you to work with me." Now it was Karen's turn to blush, like a high school girl.

"I'm flattered Karen, I really am, but I guess to answer your question I was always the nerd, never good in sports, the last pick for every team in the many schools that I attended. It wasn't until I found writing that I finally found something I was fairly good at, and attention to the smallest detail is what set's the good writers from those who just are slapping words on paper for a paycheck." He said and saw that smile on Karen's face that was driving him crazy.

"You know I expected someone totally different than you Rick, I mean I am so pleasantly surprised. When they asked me how I would feel about working with a famous author, I thought Patterson couldn't climb the steps, (Rick burst out laughing which made Karen's eyes seem to twinkle at him) and I never thought the 12th would let you go.

"Then Mayor Weldon called, I guess they got a call for a reference from a job application, I had a rough couple of months and thought about just hanging it up. I had already changed my mind, I love this job too much and have overcome the 'good old boys club' to get where I am, and I'm not ready to let that go.

"Anyway, when they told me it was you, I thought, well I bet he's going to come in here and be all Mr. Best Seller on me, but you're not like that. You're the sincerest person I've met in a very long time, especially with your fame and fortune, you're doing this to give back to the city.

"Hell, even I know the cases you and Beckett worked would allow you to write a library of novels, you don't need research" and her smile beamed as Rick blushed, something about her made him feel like he was back in high school asking a girl out.

"Well, you're highly thought of by Bob and Commissioner Boyle so when they asked me to come over to help, I like you had no idea who I would be working with. I just told them, I'm not going back into a situation where all my ideas and theories are mocked, even when they prove to be true. Bob assured me that he wanted to retain you, and you had to be desperate for help to even consider taking me on", as his smile widened,

"So, you, the mayor and Roy, have a past history and that's all I'm going to ask Rick, I don't believe in prying Karen whispered softly,

"Yeah but don't let that get around, people will get the wrong idea, and speaking of wrong ideas if you coming to dinner will put you in a bad light here, I apologize, you don't have to*"

"Rick, one thing you should know about me, I don't give a rats ass what people say about me, they're going to talk regardless, so I do what I want. Are you sure you want to be seen with me, I mean I'm just a homicide detective?" for one of the few times since he had met her, her smile was gone as her tone turned serious.

"To quote a friend, a very good new friend, I don't give a rats ass what they say about me, hell you have read enough articles that my daughter and I laugh about, the times they say I am bedding this model or actress, or that one, is usually the time she and I are playing lightsaber or some other game. You'll have to ask Alexis tonight which is her favorite fantasy island story." He laughed and her smile returned,

"Only if you guys show me the lightsabers tonight. Speaking of you better get out of her, it's after 5:00, I'll see you in a few hours, Rick, Thanks, this is going to be fun"

"Thank you, Karen, you're right this is going to be fun, see you in a bit. I can send a car for you if you want" as she waved him goodbye laughing.

As he exited the precinct waving to Ralph, he thought what a difference a few hours made. He was going home happy for the first time in a long time, the lady was not only smart, but she was absolutely beautiful, inside and out. Yeah, this could be fun, for the first time not thinking about a certain detective back at the 12th, just enjoying the moment.

Chapter 3

Castle's Loft

6:50 PM Same Day

Alexis and Martha both knew something had happened to their Dad, Son, the way he entered the loft, whistling and smiling like the cat who ate the canary. He bounced through the loft calling out,

"Mother, Daughter, may I see you for a few moments please?" in his sing-song voice, Alexis thought at first, he had stopped by the Old Haunt and gotten a pint too many, but as she hugged him, she smelled something.

It wasn't booze, it was perfume, not Beckett's, not Gina's, not Paula's where the hell did, he go to get perfume on his clothes, and better yet to whom did it belong?

God, she hoped he hadn't reverted back to that dreadful place where the Gentlemen rent a room by the hour for services provided by independent contractors. He hadn't done something like that in years. If that was it, they were going to have a serious talk.

Before she could process the thought any further, the doorbell rang, she opened the door to have an entire catering staff start to wheel in dinner from LeCerque restaurant, her Grams favorite.

"You're probably wondering dear daughter what is going on, well, we have a guest coming to dinner tonight, Detective*"

"DAD, did you have to invite Beckett here, isn't it bad enough you spend all day with her, now here in our home as well?" Alexis said a bit rougher than she wanted to,

"Well, Alexis, first of all, you're being rude, it's not polite to cut someone off when they are speaking, secondly it's not Beckett, it's Detective Karen Pedersen from the 18th Precinct. I thought I would tell you all about the change in assignments with Karen who is joining us for dinner. I ran a little long and knew I wouldn't have time to prepare a meal so I called LeCerque and had them cater it." He said still cheerfully,

"I'm sorry Dad, I jumped to conclusions when you said Detective, I apologize, you're right you taught me better manners," he pulled the young lady under his arm,

"It's OK Pumpkin, I have to go change would you watch for the door please?" He asked still whistling

"OK Dad, but DON'T call me pumpkin in front of our company please?" she made a face as he hurried off to change into something more comfortable.

He had just walked back into the living room, wearing comfortable dress jeans, a new blue button-down that flattered his eyes, and a light-yellow sweater, to compliment the outfit when the doorbell chimed.

"I got it pum eh Alexis," he called out, making a mental note to stop calling his daughter by his nickname for her since she was less than a year old. She was growing up, and well she had the right to be called what she wanted.

He opened the door and almost lost his breath, there she stood, she had changed into dark dress slacks, and a white top, very flattering to her figure, and her sweater matched the color of his, one look and they both started laughing.

"Hi Karen, please come in", as she stepped through the door and greeted him with a hug,

"Wow Rick, Nice place, and I smell something delicious, how did you get home in time to prepare a meal?" she asked,

"Hi, I'm Alexis, you must be Detective Pedersen, welcome to our home, and don't let him kid you, it's catered" she laughed, as she extended her hand.

Karen pulled her into a brief hug as well, "Sorry, we're huggers in my family, a habit I can't seem to break no matter how long I've lived in New York."

"How long have you lived here Karen? I thought you were born and raised when you mentioned Columbia, as your alma mater? Rick asked,

She smiled, "no, I came to Columbia and the big city from a little town in South Carolina, Anderson, home of the biggest prison in the Confederate war, you want to know where my accent is, right?" She laughed,

Alexis spoke up, "I do, you don't have a trace of a southern accent that I can pick up" and smiled at the young lady, "Here let me take your sweater, I swear Dad, you were taught better manners" as Rick made a face and Karen started that beautiful laugh,

"See what I mean? As his head motioned towards his daughter. But how did you lose your accent Karen, I mean I never would have guessed deep south, perhaps Vermont or possibly a New England state but never Southern." Rick said, more intrigued with the young lady than ever.

It was almost natural; his hand went to the small of her back and gently guided her into the living room to sit until the caterers had finished setting up dinner.

"Well, before I begin, who sits where, in my home Dad had his chair and no one sat there ever, I just want to be sure I don't intrude on someone's space, oh Rick, you mentioned Alexis loved chocolate mint ice cream, you may want to put that bag in the freezer before it drips on your floor" she smiled at Alexis who already liked her.

"No assigned seats Detective Pedersen, sit wherever you like, "Alexis smiled,

"Please call me Karen, Alexis, your Dad was so full of compliments of you today, I can see how grown-up you are, he was telling me the truth" she smiled and Alexis blushed,

"Well Daddy gets carried away sometimes bragging about me, he's the celebrity in the family but you would never know it, he taught me zero ego lets you get through a fall in your personal life much easier. Now Grams, well wait, just wait" as Alexis broke into a big smile, as the Grand Dame made her entrance

"Richard, why didn't you tell me we were entertaining, and catering by LeCerque, why, I won't object a bit to that," she said waving her hands in her dramatic fashion,

"Good Evening Miss Rogers, I'm Karen Pedersen, I'm working with Rick now out of the 18th Precinct, it all just happened so we thought we would tell you guys over dinner, it's a pleasure to meet you by the way."

"Good Gracious Richard, all sorts of changes going on, why don't you bring Karen's drink over and we can finally find out what is happening in my son's other life as a cop" She proclaimed, her hands moving in their normal style

"Mother, I'm not a cop, I'm just helping Karen out with a few cases. I spoke to Roy, Bob, and Frank today and they thought the 18th precinct could use the help at this time." Rick replied gently,

"You mean Beckett got you thrown out of the 12th? Did she finally get her wish Richard, you can tell us the truth?" Martha who never thought before she spoke just let it come out,

"Karen, I apologize for my Mother, sometimes she speaks without bothering to think, so Mother if you care to stay with us, I trust you to keep your comments to yourself, or take your meal in your room?" as he shot her a dirty look

Martha knew when she had pushed too hard, "I'm sorry Richard, I apologize Karen. Now let's hear what's going on that brought these changes about."

Rick had returned and handed Karen her glass of wine, one sip let her know she would need to take it slow, or well, she might do something. He sat down beside her, she moved a little closer and picked up his hand as they talked.

"I think you all or as they say down home yawl want to know how I lost my accent, well I joined the drama club and worked with my speech coach, she was brilliant and was one of the first to tell me the truth about prejudice, especially past the Mason Dixon line. She said that some, not all, but enough that mattered would hear a southern accent and immediately classify that person as dumb, fair or not, it was a reality.

"I worked with her for almost three years about being able to project what she called a 'national' accent. She had made a fortune doing commercials and she said the secret was to provide a voice with or without an accent that the consumer in Canada was just as prone to purchase as those in Georgia. It made sense, and she was living proof of its success.

"It really hit home when she let me know she was from a town not more than thirty minutes from my home in Hartwell Georgia. People always guessed her accent was from Eastern Europe and she had a blast when she cut loose with the Redneck jokes that a comedian was telling."

Rick was laughing at this point, "Then I don't feel so stupid guessing your accent was from New England, at least I had you on the right side of the country." She laughed, as he played with her hand, she smiled back and if there was attraction it was definitely coming from both.

Rick quickly explained the meeting with Roy, then the call, and finally meeting Karen and the folks at the 18th precinct. He mentioned that they had lunch at the owner of Remy's brother who called his restaurant Larry's and was very close if not as good as Remy's.

"I bet he ordered a shake didn't he Karen, he's supposed to be watching his weight and blood pressure, really Dad, do I have to check on you all the time?" Alexis scolded as Rick looked for sympathy from Karen,

"Well, it was actually only half a shake Alexis, I stole half of it" then laughed as Alexis fist-bumped her, and said, "I like her Dad," causing them both to blush.

They had their dinner with only mild irritations from Martha, she was being careful since she had pushed Rick's button earlier. After dinner, they returned to the living room for a few minutes before Martha excused herself, and Alexis went to her room to work on her homework.

"Would you like to see the office, Karen, it's basically just your office but*"

"I'd love to Rick", she replied, he took her hand to help her rise, and once again, she didn't let go, so he interlaced their fingers again. As they walked to his office, she said,

"Your family is lovely Rick, I see what you mean about Alexis, she's more mature than how I act some days" she laughed,

"Thanks, Karen, I'm proud of them both although Mother needs to put a muffler on her mouth from time to time, he smiled,

"Well she only wants what's best for you, I'm sure they worry with you being involved in shootouts and such," Karen replied softly,

"How, I mean, I" Karen placed a finger across his lips, "shh, it's OK Rick, I'll never let you get that close to fire again, you have your family to think about. I talked to Commissioner Boyle and asked him what was the real deal, he told me, so please don't be upset but I had to know I could trust you.

"I haven't had a partner since I joined the force. I got tired of getting the sexual comments or worse, it didn't matter if they were married or not, the general conclusion was that Cops are pigs" she smiled,

"Well, I can see WHY they would want to go out with you, but there's never an excuse for a man to treat a lady any other way than as a lady. I just hope somewhere some parent is teaching his son the same values for my daughter" he smiled,

"It's getting late Rick, I better go, see you in the morning?" she asked,

"No, I'm going with you in the Car Service I have standing by, you're not taking a cab at this hour of the night and if you will allow me, I would love to accompany you to say goodnight the proper way, no funny business," He said as his face turned red.

"OK, but you know I'm a cop and can take care of myself, right? She said softly,

"Yes, I know, but not as long as you let me help, OK?" he said back just as soft,

"OK, you better get my sweater, before I do something you might not like" her face was only an inch away from his,

"Sure, be right back" but he didn't move and their lips moved in sync to a soft chaste kiss, "I better get your wrap,"

They sat close to each other as the limo traveled the 22 blocks back to Karen's apartment. Rick assisted her out of the limo, walked her to her door, and when she stepped through the door, she turned and pulled him into a sweet kiss, "Thanks Rick, I really enjoyed tonight, see you tomorrow?" she whispered,

"I'll be there around 8:00 AM, thank you I enjoyed tonight as well, Good night, as he leaned in and gave her one more sweet kiss, and waited till she closed and locked her door, such a gentleman Karen thought, Kate Beckett you're an idiot, but thank you.

XxX

Beckett's Apartment

Same Evening

Kate had made it through the remainder of the day, mostly on auto-pilot, thank God they weren't called out for a case that required her to think quickly. Her entire mind had been consumed with the recent events, the most staggering, Castle leaving. She was upset that she had a disciplinary letter in her file, but she felt worse that Captain Montgomery had felt the fall out as well. He was so close to retirement and this would be a stain on a record filled with achievements and awards.

She had tossed her mail on the counter next to the "to go' meal she picked up from the corner deli, hell she didn't even remember what she selected, it would all taste the same anyway. Some people live to eat, Kate Beckett was the opposite, if she could live without ever eating, she would. Some days it would take a hunger headache or a rumbling from deep within her stomach to remember to eat.

Castle always took care of that, well guess what Kate, not anymore, he's gone for at least a year, but in all reality, forever. Why should he come back, what had she done to make him feel the warm welcome? That's right nothing. She replaced the cold bottle of water she had grabbed from the refrigerator, with a glass of wine, hell it was the bottle that Rick had given her, for something who knows what now. He was always giving people things especially her.

She was almost done with her meal, just as she thought it was tasteless, it was supposed to be chicken breast over dressing, they all tasted bland and the same to her, when there was a knock on her door. She grabbed her gun, and went to the privacy viewer, looked out to find Lanie standing there with a bottle of vodka in one hand, and a bottle of wine in the other.

"Lanie what are you doing here, don't tell me Javi called you didn't he," Kate said with a frown,

"Girl, you better be glad they both still care enough about you to try to make sure you're OK, do you know how close they both were to requesting transfers, my God Kate what the hell were you thinking." As she stormed through the door slamming the booze down on the counter.

"Transfers? What the hell would they do that for Lanie? God what a fucking mess" Kate gasped

"Well you know Javi is your boy, when he told Kevin he had about all he could take of Demming and how the sun rose in the west as long as he said, it didn't matter what anyone else told you, he was getting out. Of course, Kevin spoke up then and said he had enough of the way you both were treating Rick, it wasn't right.

"I don't know who went up the ranks but neither one of them would go to Roy, they figured you would get a slap on the wrist if that, so they kept quiet, choosing to leave you and your new love to figure it out, hell you didn't listen to anyone but him anyway. The ironic part Kate, he was wrong 90% of the time, and you mocked Rick, I hope he was good in bed" Lanie was letting it fly.

"Well whoever went up cost me a letter of reprimand and a note of corrective action for Roy, so I hope they are satisfied," Kate said, and was greeted with her friends' eye-roll,

"Oh, poor pitiful Kate, you got a letter, a letter you earned and if you're being truthful Roy earned that corrective action as well, you fuck up, it's on you both, you know how the game is played Kate, so get off your pity party." Lanie wasn't cutting her any slack at all,

"You're right Lanie, it's on me, for me and Roy but really the boys were requesting transfers? Without even talking to me? That stings Lanie, I thought we were closer than that as a team." Kate said, still confused,

"It's funny, that's exactly what Javi said when you blew off the meeting with him and Kevin for the third time because you and Tom were 'chasing down a lead' whatever bullshit that was, just tell the guys you went home for an afternoon delight.

"Like all of the pictures of a guy's car when they get caught with their pecker out of their pants, and the girlfriend destroys a perfectly innocent beautiful car, the message always says 'Hope it was worth it', so Kate was it worth it?" Lanie continued to steamroll her,

Kate looked at her friend, then slammed her hand on the table, "Hell No, he was lousy in bed, either he fell asleep and farted or he thought we were at the Daytona 500 races and was finished before the commercial was finished playing." As she reached for the vodka bottle and two glasses and poured each a healthy amount.

"Do you have to work tomorrow Kate? On-Call?" Lanie asked,

"Neither, I'm off for two days, you?"

"Same so keep pouring till I tell you to stop or can't see to tell you whatever comes first," Lannie replied as Kate tossed the spare pillow and blanket on the couch, figuring there was no way either would be sober enough to remember where she kept the spare linen in an hour or so.

Just then Kate's phone buzzed with a text coming in, she grabbed it hoping it would be a certain writer, no such luck, it was Tom, irritated that Roy busted him to his Lieutenant and he had to explain why he had held the previous robbery case open.

"Kate, WTH was up with Montgomery, he ratted me out to the Lieutenant, I got a stern verbal warning, placed in my file, who spilled the news to him?"

"Not a good time Tom, take your punishment like a man, we all got burned some worse than others, don't want to discuss it now" she texted back,

Of course, Tom had to continue it, another text came in almost as soon as she sent the previous one, "I bet it was that jealous writer former partner of yours that ratted us out, he's pissed we're together, by the way, I'm available if you would like company"

Demming would never go down as the smartest detective at the 12th, but even Kate was surprised at how moronic the last text was.

"First Castle IS my partner not former, second, he wouldn't rat anyone out, he's neither jealous nor pissed at what we have since as of now, it's over, whatever you think we had, it's over. WHAT PART of I don't want to discuss it didn't you understand? I sure as hell don't want your company, I already have a guest. Move on, stay in your lane and I'll do the same, Good-Bye". She added a couple of angry emojis so even someone as slow as Demming would understand.

That earned her a one-word response, "BITCH", she paused, then calmly blocked his number and put her phone on silent, "Now where were we Lanie?"

Chapter 4

18th Precinct

8:00 AM Next Morning

Rick was up and running his three miles by 6:00 AM, he wanted to be on time when he joined Karen at the 18th for his first full official day. He hadn't slept much, the day had gone from disaster to something, well he couldn't describe it. He never thought he would find anyone that would completely wipe out thoughts of Beckett that slipped into his mind at all hours of the night and day, regardless of where or who he was with.

This morning's run wasn't as hard as it usually was, his thoughts to the dark-haired detective from South Carolina running next to him with her beautiful laugh. She certainly had made a positive impression on Alexis last evening, he rose to find a note from his daughter,

"Don't blow this one Daddy, Karen is REALLY nice, Grams and I like her, a lot." Don't let her be a stranger, we would love to see her again, maybe she would want to go shopping someday, ask her Daddy, and don't just say you did, you know I will know, "Love Alexis

She had pinned it to his travel bag, she knew he would be up and gone early and wanted to make sure he got her message. He quickly showed and was on his way in plenty of time to be at the 18th on time, even stopping to start a new tradition. He purchased Karen's coffee along with one for him, and also a chocolate glazed doughnut, she didn't like bear claws, thank God. He couldn't seem to stop whistling and smiling, the day suddenly looked so much brighter.

He arrived at the precinct and was greeted by Ralph, eh Sargent Pitts warmly, and motioned to proceed to the elevator. Once he stepped off on the fourth floor he turned and there she was, directing a maintenance person on how she wanted the chair assembled. As he got closer, he heard her,

"Oh, for God's sake Jake, can you move any slower. Look my partner will be here and I want him to have a place to sit, so get your ass in gear or I'll tell someone about a certain football pool someone runs, do you understand? Rick smiled as the man began working in earnest.

He made a little sound to get her attention, she turned her head and there was his smile, God she killed him every time she did that. She was beautiful, long hair flowing and her pantsuit was a shade of blue that he absolutely loved.

"Good Morning Rick, trust you slept well last evening." She smiled,

"Good Morning Karen, and yes I did, best sleep I've had in a long while. I even enjoyed the three-mile run this morning," he smiled, not knowing that she felt the same about his smile as he did hers.

She thought to herself "God Rick, I wish I could grab you and continue where we left off last night" then shook herself back to reality.

"I thought you could use a little pick me up and I wasn't sure if anyone had used the new coffee machine yet, so I got you this" as he placed her coffee down, along with a small bag. She peeked into the bag and her eyes got big as she took a sip of her coffee,

"Oh, you wonderful man, how did you know this was my favorite doughnut? I'm still trying to figure out how you knew my coffee, I mean it's not your run of the mill and you even knew I hate Splenda, and yes, I can tell when they try to fool me," she laughed, music to Rick's ears.

He set his coffee on his desk, His Desk, she had done a hell of a lot more than pull some ratty old chair out of storage. Speaking of chairs, his had just been completed assembled and Jake was asking him to try it out. It was top of the line, Roy was going to shit when he got the invoice approved by Boyle, he thought.

He took a sip of his coffee, and saw her smiling, "Information Technology will be up soon to hook up your computer to the network, so be thinking of a password, 8 characters, no personal data so when you have to sign in, you'll be ready. It takes me forever to set up a password, so I try to keep a list of ones I could use but write them in code, like FA BD, then the numbers 04011969RC, as she showed him the last entry on a page of legal pad"

Rick looked a minute, then realized, 04011969 was his birthday but what was the rest, could it be his favorite author's birthday then his initials after the date? NO, that would be too presumptuous he thought.

"It's cryptic all right, I have no clue what that stands for," he said his eyes locking on hers for just a moment, you're at work Rick, cut it out he scolded himself.

"You sure Rick? I mean look at it close" she smiled again,

"Well my birthday is April 1, 1969, and my initials of course are RC but not sure if that was what you were thinking." He said, and blushed a bit,

She smiled even wider, "FA stands for Favorite author, the rest you figured out, you're a better detective than you get credit for. Before I forget, please tell your Mother and especially Alexis how much I enjoyed last night. I felt so at home, it was really fun.

"Well they felt the same way about you, in fact, my daughter left me this note this morning when I got back from my run," as he handed it to Karen,

"Don't blow this one Daddy, Karen is REALLY nice, Grams and I like her, a lot." Don't let her be a stranger, we would love to see her again, maybe she would want to go shopping someday, ask her Daddy, and don't just say you did, you know I will know, "Love Alexis

Karen was shocked, "See I told you, Karen, so don't get me in trouble. I know you just met her but Alexis loves going shopping, so I can tell her I asked you now and not be lying." Rick said,

"Well, that's not exactly true Rick," she said with her eyes forming that devilish tease look, as she licked her fingers just finishing her doughnut. She made eating even look sexy Rick thought.

"What, OK, Karen, would you like to go shopping with my daughter Alexis someday in the future?" he asked and then smiled and said, "Satisfied?"

"Yes, and tell Alexis I would love too, just to give me a call, if I have the day off, I would love to spend a day with your daughter, and perhaps we could all three have lunch or dinner. I saw your Mother is going on tour with her play or we could ask her" She smiled, and reached over and took his phone, looking for Alexis she couldn't find any contact, so she had to ask

"Where is your Daughter's contact information in your phone Rick, she should be listed as your ICE, she's mature enough and certainly loves her Dad enough to make good choices?"

Rick reached over and pushed the P in his contacts, up came Pumpkin, and a picture of Alexis,

"Don't tell her I have her listed as that, she will kill me, she hates when I call her that in public or in front of company. She's been my little pumpkin since we flew home to New York when she was 6 months old from Los Angeles. You're right I should change the ICE contact information" as he deleted Kate Beckett as ICE and added Alexis Castle and her phone number, street address and handed the phone back to Karen.

"I'm sorry Rick, that was pushy of me, it's really none of my business, I saw you delete Kate Beckett as your ICE, I should have been quiet, I'm sorry." Her eyes showed the sadness, she was feeling deep inside,

"No, It's I who am sorry, I really didn't have anyone else to list, so I had Beckett down. I thought she was a friend of the family, at that time, well things happen." He said

Karen's eyes lost their sadness with Rick's explanation, "If I'm right you have a lot of people you consider associates or colleagues, but few you can call a friend, I'm the same way. They call me the Ice Bitch behind my back because I don't spread my legs for any good-looking man that comes along. I got to this position by working three times as hard as most of the men and some have a problem accepting that." Her eyes lost the twinkle,

"Hey, you're one of the warmest, most genuine people I have met, and you have to be good at what you do, or Bob and Frank wouldn't have pulled strings to keep you. Don't give the pigs another thought, any gentleman knows it's developing the relationship where growth comes from.

"I know I want to get to know everything about you, and no I'm not a stalker. I bribed Ralph to find out how you took your coffee and what was your favorite pastry. He told me to NEVER bring you a bear claw," as they both laughed.

"Well, truthfully you were blowing my mind, I'm glad you told me your source, and I'm flattered that you cared enough to ask." She said the twinkle returned to her eyes.

"Well, we should get to work before Frank hears about how I'm slowing you down, instead of helping. "he laughed,

"Good thought, I put the original files from records for the case we talked about yesterday on your desk, I'll show you how to log in later this afternoon if that works for you." Her eyes locked on his, and he wondered how the hell was he ever going to work, then she broke the glance and turned to her own desk.

"Sounds perfect" as Rick turned and opened the file, he got a whiff of her perfume, she smelled so wonderful, it was different from other perfumes, but he loved it. It was comforting knowing that she was right there beside him, and the trouble she had gone to in order to make him feel welcome.

Rick read through the entire file, making notes on a pad of paper, then started back reading the file again, making marks on his notes, until about two hours had passed. He had been so immersed in the case file, Karen watched him with a smile, knowing the man really took the job seriously, as serious as any cop.

Somethings weren't adding up to Rick. The victim, Mary Jo Keding had been raised in a small-town upstate New York, had been extremely shy her entire life, had married her boyfriend from college, who had been a player, including two women who had taken restraining orders out against him.

The husband's alibi was airtight, he was in court appearing for an unrelated charge during the time his wife had been killed. He may have been a player but to all accounts, he had changed his ways when he and Mary Jo had gotten together. Rick made a note to ask Karen for her personal opinion when something struck him.

He turned to the wedding album and the one girl was apparently in a lot of shots except she appeared to have two different gowns on. Then he saw a group photo and the two were together, what the hell? Twins?

"Karen, do you have a second to look at something?" he asked,

"Sure, thing Rick, did you find something? As she came to stand behind his chair, he could feel her ample breasts against him, and it was all he could do to keep himself focused, as he spoke.

"Did you know this girl or girls? It looks like they are twins, and what did you think of Terry Keding, did he really change once he met Mary Jo? Rick asked, breathing in her scent as inconspicuously as possible,

"Yeah, Terry completely changed, Mary Jo wouldn't even date him for a year making him prove himself and he did, he changed. Those girls are twins, Karen and Sharon Lacey, and no one could figure out why they were invited.

"Seems Terry started dating Sharon and was also fooling around on the side with Karen at the same time, caused a hell of a rift between the two for some time. When they showed up, we figured it was Terry's mother who invited them to spite Mary Jo, who she despised. Why none of us could figure out.

"I checked her out and Mrs. Goody Two Shoes was shacked up with her husband's business partner in Miami during the kill zone times, so she was cleared of that, although it did cost her a divorce when it came out."

"I know you said Mary Jo didn't date much, and you mentioned the Lacey twins and Terry, any other scandals on his side that came up?

"Well it was only a rumor, and we could never get it confirmed but Terry didn't stop at the daughters, he also slept with their mother at the same time."

"WHAT? What the hell did girls see in this guy, was he rich?" Rick asked completely befuddled that any man would be so cavalier with an entire family of females.

"I know this is painful Karen, you don't have to look if you don't want to, but did the ME ever give you an idea of the murder weapon, the shape of these wounds is unusual? By the way who did the autopsy anyway?" Rick asked,

"It's OK Rick, I've looked at them at least a hundred times but thank you for being so considerate. Well, Doctor Parrish was out with the flu and Doctor Perlmutter was on vacation so the ME from Albany actually filled in, although I didn't agree with a lot of his findings."

"Is the conference room free Karen, we need to call Roy" Rick asked,

Karen took his hand and led him around the corner to an open conference room, locked the door, and closed the blinds. "Why do we need to call Roy, Rick?"

"You led me to this room and never asked why until we got here, thank you for the confidence in me, that meant more than you know," Rick said,

"Well, part of being a good partner is backing them up, even when you don't know what all is going on, you just trust them, you know they have your back so be sure to have his." She smiled,

Karen dialed the number of Roy's private line in his office, and waited,

"Montgomery here, hold on, be right with you" was answered on the third ring.

They heard him raise his voice and what sounded like Esposito or Ryan, perhaps both were getting chewed out,

"I don't care if it is her day off, if you two can't figure it out call her, if she won't answer the phone go ask her, this case isn't going to wait till she gets back because you two are untrained how to do your jobs, now get out of here, keep me posted" they heard a chorus of Sir, yes Sirs as Roy returned to the phone,

"I'm sorry about that, how can I help you." Roy was back to his professional self,

"Hi Roy, it's Rick with Detective Pedersen," Rick said calmly,

"Hey, how are things Rick, glad you called, but I have a feeling this is more than a check-in call, what do you need?"

"Roy, I have some autopsy photos, where the findings written don't match the photographs, it was done last year when Lanie was out with the flu and Perlmutter wouldn't return from his fishing trip, so the ME out of Albany did it, it's botched big time Roy."

"What are your thoughts now Rick?" Roy asked,

Rick nodded to Karen,

"Sir, this is Pedersen, Rick and I thought that if Dr. Parrish could take a look at the notes and photos, without any names on the file, she could shed some light on a possible murder weapon, that is if you will allow it Sir"

"That sounds like a good idea, she's off today and technically I don't have authority over her, BUT I can put pressure on someone who will get her to cooperate. I'll send Espo over when he gets back. Rick you may want to lay low when he comes over, you know how fast he can spread gossip.

"Detective, I'll make him announce himself at the Desk, Sargent, be sure he tells you when he's on the way up to give Rick time to stay out of sight," Roy said,

Rick then blew Roy and Karen's mind, "Why? Why should I hide the fact that I'm now at the 18th by request Roy? Would it cause you problems if he did spread the news around? Karen, would you care if people knew I was here?" Rick asked,

"Not at all Rick, I would be honored to have them know we were now partners," she said,

"Well, Rick, that's up to you, I have no problem, Beckett is off for the next two days so she will have time to get it out of her system, especially when she learns you and Karen are partners now, so if that's how you want it, just let Espo see you over there and see how long it takes him to spread it around. That's another thing I need to correct, his old lady gossip habits, and will give me the fuel to do so."

"Sir, really I am honored to be Rick's partner, he's already spotted somethings I and other detectives have overlooked for months, so Thank You, sir," Karen said,

"You're welcome Detective, I knew you two would hit it off, enjoy the time there Rick, and remember every closure helps my rate, not Vance's" he laughed as he hung up.

"Well, things are about to get interesting, I hope you're ready for this and I don't cause you any problems," Rick said, as they both leaned over the phone to make sure it was disconnected, and once again their lips traveled the short distance to capture a short sweet kiss,

"I'm sorry Karen," Rick said,

"I'm sorry to Rick, it should have lasted longer" as she kissed him longer and this time there was definitely tongue.

Chapter 5

Kate Beckett's Apartment

8:37 AM Next Morning

Kate woke up with the worst headache, and was only half-dressed, she had her pajama bottoms on, but she still was wearing the blouse she had on yesterday when wait, who the hell came over, and what did they do? She pushed herself from the bed stumbled out to the living room to see her friend, Lanie Parrish, in about the same condition as she was.

On the table was the culprit, an empty bottle of Stolichnaya Vodka and a half-empty bottle of some cheap wine, God no wonder her head was killing her. The glasses showed lipstick from Lanie's and a slight amount of wine remaining. Kate gingerly collected the bottle, and glasses, spilling out the residue in the sink on her way to the refrigerator to retrieve two bottles of water, and the aspirin from the medicine cabinet.

God, why did they drink so much? It hurt even when her bare feet touched the floor, almost like she was on the sidewalk as the cement jackhammers drilled away to bust it up. Yesterday was a bit of a blur, she thought she remembered getting into trouble at work, oh yeah, she had a fucking letter put in her file courtesy of Commissioner Boyle. Roy got a corrective action notice, Fuck, why did he get that, he didn't do anything, who went to Boyle? God only knew but it was done.

She checked her phone not remembering the text messages until she reviewed them, well guess I don't have a boyfriend either, who was he anyway to complain, he got a verbal, a hell of a lot less than he deserved, asshole she thought. Why the hell did I even start seeing him? She heard a moan coming from the general direction of the lump on her couch that she thought must be Lanie, so she made her way slowly to her.

"Here, take these, if you feel like I feel, you need them and more. You better drink the full bottle, hell why am I telling you, you're supposed to be the doctor" Kate said,

"Yeah, but I work on dead people," she moaned holding her head,

"You mean we feel this bad and we're still alive? Drink your water Doctor, I'm making coffee for me, and heating the water for your tea." Kate mumbled,

Lanie sat up, well it took her three tries to stay sitting upright, took her aspirin, and held the cold bottle to her head before she drank it down in one gulp.

"Why the hell did I drink so much Kate, you were the one with the problems damn it, why didn't you stop me? Lanie whined,

"Don't give me that crap Lanie, I tried to cut you off, you poured yourself twice as much. I can't help it if you and Javi can't get your timing straight except for your booty calls, that's all I heard last night, about how he never wants to do anything but spend the weekend in bed, well fix it, or dump his ass." Kate bellowed,

Kate Beckett without her coffee was bad enough, Kate Beckett without her coffee and a hell of a hangover was ten times worse. Lanie decided to button it, for nothing more than the sake of her aching head that rattled every time Kate raised her voice.

"So, what happened last night, why did we drink the whole damn bottle then start on the wine?" Lanie asked still trying to figure out where the drums that were beating in her ears were coming from, then she realized it was just her pulse beating reverberating in her ears.

"Someone went over Roy's head about how I mistreated my team allowing Demming to make remarks that were insulting, and I guess Roy even heard me join in, anyway, he got a corrective action note, and I got a formal letter of reprimand. Get this, Tom, who got me into this trouble was bitching because he got a formal verbal warning" she showed her the text string,

"Kate, did he end it by calling you a BITCH? I'm going to hurt that SOB, just as soon as I figure out how I can stand up without either wanting to fall down, hold my head, or barf my guts out."

"I'm telling you now, you do any barfing, you're going to clean it up and don't let me hear it", as she poured her first cup of coffee, drinking it black, not even waiting to look for her sugar-free vanilla pump and cream.

Lanie stumbled to the counter and made her tea, and almost emptied Kate's sugar dispenser into it, trying to get something into her stomach. Kate had made dry toast and made her at least try to eat one piece, it seemed to be working, she didn't feel like she was about to barf her anus out of her mouth at any minute.

"So, you got a letter, Roy got a CA (Corrective Action) note, but something else was pissing you off last night, something Castle did or didn't do, but I can't remember now, what the hell was it? You went on and on last night, I haven't seen you that messed up, crying over a guy since college, so what the hell happened? Lanie asked now feeling a little safer since Kate was drinking her third cup of coffee.

"He Left Lanie" was all she said, with a sad look in her eyes.

"Kate, he always leaves, he'll be back, hell a few months ago you were complaining how he was cramping your style and cutting into your and the new Detective's time. What happened, and why do you care? I thought you wanted him gone?" Lanie asked, still confused with her friend's behavior.

"I do, eh I mean I did, or at least I thought I did, but now, well now that he's gone, I know he left because of me, and well I'm not that kind of person to be able to deliberately hurt someone and not be sorry." She said quietly staring at her bookcase full of every book Richard Castle had ever written.

"Well, then call him and apologize, he's probably waiting for your call, that boy was so into you everyone could see it but you. Why did you ever take up with Tom, to begin with, Kate? Did you do it to make Castle jealous, well if you did that backfired big time" She knew it was a mistake by the time the words had cleared her mouth, Beckett had her eye roll and evil eye directly pointed her way.

"Any more obvious romance tips, Dr. Phil, excuse me, Dr. Phyllis?" Kate spat out bitterly,

"Well, a friend doesn't give two shits about if you like it or not, if you need to hear something, they tell you. Kate, I'm your friend, and it's obvious you had a thing for Castle, I just can't figure out why or how Tom ever entered the picture, to begin with," Lanie said not backing down one inch,

"Well, being truthful, a lot of good that's going to do me now, but I guess I was pissed at him and wanted to show him I could get someone just like he did with that hussy actress Ellie Monroe. I think it started when I met Kyra Blaine, as he put it, 'the one that got away'. I wanted him to feel a little of the hurt I did, I never wanted him to just walk away and leave." She said tears threatening to fall,

"Oh honey, why didn't you just tell him, he's crazy about you. I'm sure he didn't get over you that quickly, call him, today and apologize, I bet he'll be back in the precinct on Monday." Lanie tried to encourage her,

"You think so Lanie, I mean, I really messed up by dating Tom." She said,

"No honey you messed up when you let the whole precinct know you two were sleeping together, something Castle never boasted about, although I'm sure he did. That is the cardinal sin, Kate, never rub sleeping with someone different in a man's face, they get all territorial, or like Castle, they just walk away and say it's not worth it." She wasn't sparing her feelings,

"Is it that 'it's not worth it, or is it 'she's not worth it' Lanie? Kate asked, closer to tears,

"Truthfully honey, I don't know, and neither do you or will you until you talk to the man, pick up the damn phone, and call or text him if you are that big of a coward. I got to get out of here, I'm sure there's something I forgot at home yesterday. I'll call you later, maybe we can do lunch tomorrow if your Dad's still out of town" Lanie said as she hugged her,

"Sounds good Lanie, Dad won't be back for three more weeks so lunch tomorrow sounds good. I'll call you tomorrow, and thanks Lanie, for everything, I needed that, even though we both will pay for it the rest of the day." She showed her out the door,

XxX

18th Precinct

Later Same Day

They broke apart, Karen blushed almost like a high school girl after her first kiss. Rick just said "WOW" and looked at the beautiful lady in front of him.

"Karen, please don't take this the wrong way, but if I have any hopes of staying here working with you, we need to set up some ground rules. First, that kiss made me feel like I was back I school dating the Prom Queen, but we can't continue to act like this at your place of work.

"No matter how careful we are someone will see, and well, I know how the brass feels about that so can we agree to keep kissing, but not once we enter this building or crime scene. OK?

"Don't get me wrong I love to kiss you," his eyes locked on hers and saw the sparkle, "I mean I could spend hours doing it, but I know you worked hard for your career and I don't want to be the one to cheapen it or derail it.

"I hope that made sense, I'm still a little fuzzy" he smiled, as she took his hand and gave him his smile, the one that melted him, every time she looked at him.

"You're right Rick, I know better, but damn it, you're just so nice, and I have wanted to kiss you since you first got here. I know we have to be professional, and I promise, no more kissing here, as long as you promise to still kiss me outside of work" she smiled,

"That, dear detective will never be a problem. "He smiled,

"Well, we need to change the subject or I'll never stop thinking about it, so let me open the blinds and unlock the door, what were you thinking about the wounds, Rick? I know you said the pictures don't match the report, what was off?" Karen asked softly,

"Well, those wounds weren't made with the kitchen knife the original detectives on scene attributed them to, if I'm right, and I may be wrong, it looked more like a surgical cut, notice the smooth edges of each side of the cut flesh." As he showed Karen the blown-up section of just the wound area.

"You're right Rick, those lazy bastards, they just wanted to close the case and made up crap. It's a good thing both of them have retired, or I'd have their ass, regardless if they were friends of Captain Vance or not." Karen was pissed, the first time Rick had seen that side of her.

She looked over at her 'partner' and noticed he was acting a little tentative now,

"I'm sorry Rick, I have a temper, especially when people just fluff off their jobs that could cost us the chance to bring a killer to justice."

"No, I understand, I just don't want you to get angry with me, let's make a deal, if I upset you, you'll tell me right there, right then, and I'll do the same, we need to talk as partners and know what is really going on with each other, OK?" Rick said shyly,

"Agreed. Rick?" she asked, shyly,

"Yes Karen, did I miss something?" he answered softly,

"No, nothing like that, it's just, well, eh, I'm just going to say it, I'm sorry you got treated badly, just tell me when I'm going off too long or loud please, and definitely if I ever hurt your feelings, that's something I never want to do, partner, OK?" She looked down as she finished speaking, then raised to lock on his when he replied,

"OK, same here, I don't want to hurt you for anything, so please tell me as well" his eyes lock for a second, and her eyes were only on him, full of that sparkle,

"Good," she almost giggled, as her phone buzzed with a text. She opened her phone to read it,

"Detective Peterson, this is Detective Esposito from the 12th, Captain Montgomery wanted me to come over and pick up a file and deliver it special handling to the ME, Doctor Parrish. I should be there around 2:00 PM" she read it, smiled then handed the phone to Rick,

"He spelled your name wrong, Karen but that gives us time for lunch if you want before he gets here if you want that is" Rick smiled,

"I'm starving, how about Italian today, it's close and quick," she asked

"Lead the way partner," he said as they walked by their desks to retrieve his sports coat and her purse, and they were out the door.

"Rick, the place is called Cereno's and it's a family place, 4th generation now, they have great wedding soup, sometimes I just grab that and an appetizer." She smiled, "I barely got my run in this morning, so I have to be careful on the calories, they love to go straight to my ass" she laughed,

"Well, there's nothing wrong with any part of your body, and If you're serious about running, I can run with you, I'll just shower here at the precinct and have a change of clothes." He said,

"Or you could shower in my guest bath, that is if you trust me, and I would love to run with you, are you being serious? You would run all the way here, then run with me?" She asked surprise all over her face,

"What time shall I show up partner, I mean I may have to bring a change of clothes and shower stuff tonight if you're not sick of seeing me by then?" He said,

"How about you go home and grab a couple of changes, and whatever you need for your shower, and shave, and meet me back at my place for dinner after we leave tonight, I can cook and I would love to spend some time out of work with you." Her eyes told him what the words didn't, music to his ears,

"Well if I have that motivation, hell I'm going to order the pasta, I'll burn the calories off running with my partner" he smiled,

"Great, me too, it's all homemade Rick, all authentic. I think you'll like it" as they entered the door,

Karen was right, it was authentic and it was delicious, homemade Italian bread and rolls with real churned butter, he smiled, and whispered, "You can't bring Alexis here, she'll kill me" he laughed,

"She loves her Dad and wants to keep him around, she's really a great young lady Rick. I'm glad you have at least somebody else that cares about you and your wellbeing," She smiled, the word else wasn't lost on either, it was early but the attraction was definitely there. The fact that his family loved her made it even better.

They finished lunch and were back at the precinct at 1:40 PM just in the rare occasion that Esposito would be early, he finally showed up at 2:27 PM, when Ralph called and Karen gave the all-clear to send him up. Rick was busy with another file, listing all of those near to the crime, including anyone in the wedding party when he heard the all familiar voice.

"Detective Peterson, I'm Detective Esposito from the 12th" he started off,

"Well Esposito, the name is as she spelled it out one letter at a time, Pedersen, not Peterson, we have the file right here, Rick do you have it on your desk?"

Rick turned his chair and saw the look on Esposito's face appear as if he had seen a ghost, "Sure thing Karen, right here, the instructions for Doctor Parrish, are in a sealed envelope, so if you want to know anything Espo, you need to talk to her." Rick said as he watched the man almost go into shock.

"Castle, what the hell are you doing here, and why are you sitting at a Detective's desk?" Javi stammered,

"Oh, I take it you know my new partner Detective, Esposito, this is Rick Castle, my partner" as they both watch the paleness creep over the olive-skinned detective,

"We were told you were gone, not available until after your book is published and your first book tour. What the hell are you doing playing cop over here?" Javi stammered

"Oh, I assure you, Detective Esposito, Rick's not playing Detective, please deliver that file to the ME as soon as possible, it's the work of my partner digging into a cold case that trained Detectives such as yourself couldn't solve, so before you leave is there anything else you would like to know?" Karen was about as cold as Beckett when she wanted to be, proved by the ice cycles off her words to Esposito.

"I won't be back at the 12th Esposito, what you were told and by whom, I really don't know or care. I have a pretty full schedule so you'll excuse us please." The ultimate put down, payback in a sort to the "You're not a cop Castle" comments Esposito was being dismissed from the floor by a civilian. Not just any civilian, but the man who he had berated as playing a cop. Two large uniform officers approached him and he knew he had to go, as they reached him, he spun on his heels and left without another word,

"I know where the elevator is, keep your hands off me," could be heard as the uniformed cops made sure he made it all the way to and onto the elevator.

"I thought that went rather well, what do you think?" Rick asked a smile across his face,

"I think he can't wait to call someone at the 12th and blow the cover story they issued all to hell, and the shit is about to hit the fan over there" Karen laughed,

"I need coffee Partner, let's take a walk for a few minutes, OK?" Rick said smiling

"Sounds like an excellent idea, right there with you" as they momentarily locked pinkie fingers then remembered where they were and pulled apart and walked to the elevators, laughing about the look on Esposito's face.

Chapter 6

Lanie Parish Apartment

6:12 PM Same Day

Lanie had gotten home took a long hot shower, taken several more headache pain relievers until she finally began to get some relief from perhaps the worst hangover she had since her college days. At least this time she came home with all of the underwear she left with, something she couldn't always say for the good old days.

She was sure Kate felt just as bad if not worse as she did. Thinking about it, Castle leaving would truly devastate her friend, regardless of how stupid either were acting, they cared about each other. She had just changed into comfortable lounge pajamas, who was going to see her anyway, and finished the Mac and Cheese TV Dinner she started earlier, it stayed down and she wanted to play it safe. Less than five minutes later some asshole was pounding on her door, uninvited.

She made her way over to the privacy viewer, peered out to see Javi walking back and forth, and once again starting to pound on her door.

"I see you out there Javier Esposito, and if you value your life you won't pound on my door again" she shouted through the door, "What the hell do you want anyway, we didn't have plans tonight. The irritation clearly showing in her voice.

"Chica, you have to let me in, I have news, really, this is going to really turn the precinct upside down, let me in, I swear Chica I'm telling the truth" he rambled on before he started mixing English with Spanish, something about screwing up and they never forget Jesús, caga una vez y ellas nunca olvidan,

Lanie threw open the door, to face her sometime boyfriend face to face.

"What the hell are you going on about, and I warn you Javier Esposito this is not a good day to piss me off, do you understand?" As she glared at him,

"Chica, I promise you, this is important, I told Ryan and he and I disagreed about how we were going to tell Beckett" He was back to rambling again,

"Sit your ass down and start from the very beginning, don't leave anything out, you understand, or I swear you won't be using those family jewels for the foreseeable future, " She growled as Javi found a chair and began to explain how Montgomery sent him to the 18th to pick up a special evidence package that she was to get on first thing when she returned to work day after tomorrow, some high profile case that got botched and the Governor was involved now.

Javi knew he had to embellish the story to get Lanie to do as he was asked, and the Governor was as high as he dared go, she wasn't stupid.

"OK, so you went to the 18th and picked up the package, so what the hell happened that's got you acting like some damn fool, spill and I mean now" Lanie's eyes were as wide as saucers, and Javi knew it was now time to unload the information.

"Well, I met Detective Karen Pedersen, she spelled her last name funny,"

"Javi, do you want to keep your balls intact, the story, just the story" Lanie blared at him, losing her patience.

"Well I asked for the package and she asked her partner to hand it to me, when he turned to face me it was Castle, and get this, Detective Karen Pedersen introduced him as her new partner. Lanie, the girl is a looker I mean she's got Ta Ta's like yours, maybe bigger, OUCH, why did you hit me", he cried out

"You stupid ass, you never tell the woman you've been sleeping with for the last year some other woman has better tits and not expect to get hit, or killed. Just see how long that you'll have to use your memory to remind you what they really look like now you asshole.

"She's got better tits, in a pig's ear, now go on, before I kill you" Lanie was pissed, at Castle, at Javi for inferring her Ta Ta's were second to some other lady especially Castle's new partner. Kate told her he left and wouldn't be back until his book and the first tour was completed, where did that horseshit come from.

"Well, anyway putting that aside, you judge for yourself about the physical look, but Lanie they were into each other, I mean really into each other. The chemistry just reeked of them sneaking off to a closet for a quickie, and all Castle would say was he was busy and had the uniforms show me the door."

"What precinct was this? Did you say the 18th? She asked, a head nod was all a reluctant Esposito would acknowledge, he wasn't about to say anything to keep from getting cut off from sex or the hell beat out of him or both.

"So, what did you and Ryan come up with, which one of you two are going to tell her before she finds out some other way and makes life worse than a living hell for you both?" she stared right at him,

"Well, we thought, since this is really going to knock her for a loop it would be better if it came from someone closer than just two guys that work with her, like from her best friend, that's what Ryan suggested." Espo begin to squirm to see where the projectile was going to come from,

"So, you agree with Kevin, you want me to tell Kate, that Castle didn't go away for the book, well at least that we know of, that you are positive it was Castle there, and so help me God Javier Esposito, if you're wrong, you'll be the male part of another Lorena and John Bobbitt case, but I'll be sure yours goes missing, you understand?" Her eyes scaring the hell of out the former special forces member,

"Lanie he spoke to me, in fact, he even told me he wasn't coming back to the 12th, so I should just go, and before I knew it two gorillas in uniforms were approaching me, I know it's weird Lanie, but Castle seems like he's liked and respected over there, especially by Detective Pedersen"

"You really screwed my plans up Javi, I spent the night with Kate last night watching and helping her get drunk and cry over Castle, now this, this I have no idea how it's going to hit her. You're sure without any doubt before I go over there and go through this again, Castle and Detective Ta Ta are close, as you say"

"Without a doubt Lanie, I mean if Kate finds out when she's at the precinct God only knows what this is going to do to her. At least she still has Demming for a boyfriend, not much but better than being alone" Javi said,

"Well, she dumped him last night, let's just say it didn't end well, and tell your friend from the 54th if he ever calls her that name again, it will be his balls that they will be looking for, along with the rest of his mutilated body" Lanie glared,

"What name did he call her, I'll take care of that, just tell me" Javi was manning up finally,

"He texted her last night, complaining he got a verbal, Kate told him to take his punishment, everyone got burned some a lot worse, she didn't want to talk about. He texted back something about Castle being the rat, and how he was jealous of them, as her former partner, Kate went nuts on his ass. She told him not to blame Castle, he wouldn't do that, and that they were through, he sent back one-word BITCH text so your boy is a coward to go along with stupid." Lanie blared her eyes,

"He called her a Bitch in a text message? Because she told him she didn't want to talk about it, and not to blame Castle? I got this one Chica, I'll take care of it" with a look in his eye that didn't bode well for the cutie from Robbery.

"What are you going to do Lanie, she's got to hear it from one of us, if she doesn't, she'll hate all of us for not warning her, you know how she gets." He asked, genuine concern in his voice

Lanie held up her fingers to tell Javi to zip it, as she dialed Kate,

"Hey, how are you feeling any better? Yeah me too, look I know I said I had a lot of things to do, but do you think we could talk tonight. Javi was here, we talked and well things didn't go well for one of us, can I come over"

There was a pause as Kate was talking to Lanie, Javi couldn't hear, then she replied,

"OK, I'll see you in an hour, and Kate, I think we need to lay off the booze tonight, I'll bring doughnuts and ice cream, see you in an hour"

XxX

18th Precinct

Later Same Day

They went down the stairs, careful to obey their own new rule of workplace etiquette, Rick waved to Ralph, as Karen asked, "need a coffee, Ralph?"

He smiled, and shook his head no, "I would love it, but the doc says I need to cut back on caffeine and I'm due for a physical soon, so thanks Detective, but I better not"

Rick held the door for her and received her smile as payment. Once outside he carefully placed his hand in the small of her back, a gentle touch that let her know he was there, nothing else was needed as he guided them the one block to the coffee shop, they were beginning to claim as theirs. The back booth was where Karen headed as Rick placed their orders, and waited a few minutes to retrieve the order.

It only took a few minutes until Rick placed the coffee with NO SPLENDA in front of Karen, along with a chocolate glazed doughnut. She smiled up at him,

"You better be serious about being my running partner, all these sweets are going straight to my ass and it will be your fault," she laughed

"I'm serious Karen, just tell me what time you want me to stop by for dinner, and leave my change of clothes, I mean if you still want, I could shower at the precinct," Rick said, quietly, face a bit flushed

"Well, how is 7:00 PM, I'm making it a point, and so are you to get out of here tonight before five. Does Alexis know you're coming for dinner tonight? You better text her so she doesn't make something or worry about you" Karen said, still smiling,

Rick pulled out his phone pulled up his text messages and showed Karen the conversation with Alexis from earlier,

"Hey Alexis eh P, no I won't call you that. I wanted to let you know Karen is making me dinner tonight, I'll be home to grab some change of clothes since tomorrow we start running before work and she has a guest BR I'm going to shower before work"

"YOU ARE KIDDING ME, you didn't scare her away Dad, that's great, tell her thanks for letting me know about dinner, I know you didn't think of it"

"You wound me, daughter, of course, I thought of it, right after Karen asked me to text you, then a smiley emoji and Oh she said she would love to go shopping with you when she gets a day off, the only catch is old Dad joins you for lunch when you are done"

"GREATTTTTTTTTTT! Tell her whenever she can, I bet she wears close to my size, she dresses sharp, and I think that specialty store off 5th would have a lot of things she would love. Thanks for asking Dad, you're the best, Got to Go, talk to you soon, tell Karen I said hi, and to take care of you,"

Karen's smile lit up, as Rick smiled, just thinking how well his little girl and eh, well, his, eh partner, and new friend were hitting it off.

"She really loves you, Rick, I mean I was close to my Dad but not as close as you two seem to be." She said,

"Well, for a long time it was just her stuck with a new Dad trying to figure out how to take care of her without killing or injuring her, you have to remember there wasn't a YouTube channel or Siri to ask back then" he laughed, as her eyes twinkled, as she waited for him to continue if he cared to, she never asked any questions.

"I told you I was young, well her Mother, after I bribed her with whatever she wanted if she won't abort went back to work as an actress, and I was working and trying to finish my degree. One day a class was canceled and I got home to find Meredith auditioning in our marital bed as Alexis was screaming from her crib.

"I threw the Director out, she cursed me and told me that was part of the job and I had cost her the part, long story short, the following week we were back in New York in my Mother's small apartment until Black Pawn signed me two weeks later. I bought the loft cash, so Alexis and I would never have to worry about having a home to live in again, and settled with her Mother for full custody, her idea, for a large cash settlement. I mean what mother sells the right to custody to their kid for a few thousand dollars, really" he looked out the window, and tears pooled in his eyes,

Karen reached over gently took his hand and said, "Hey, looks like it worked out for the best, you're a fantastic Dad, your daughter adores you, and is always looking out for your wellbeing, so I think you got the better end of that deal Rick" she patted his hand gently, and watched as his smile came back.

"Well, I was surprised that Alexis took to you so quickly, she usually waits to form an opinion but she liked you from the first conversation. Let me rephrase my last statement, by that, you would think that women come to our loft all of the time, not true, outside of my editor, who also is my second ex-wife, there's my agent, and well, other than a bunch of guys for my poker game that's about it." He said softly,

"Rick, I know your history, just like all your fans do, I know about Gina, and I'm glad you're still friendly enough to work together. Since you're opening up to me, I guess it's my turn" she said, still smiling,

"Hey Karen, I'm sorry, I wasn't asking I mean that's your past, it's really none of my business, I'm sorry I didn't want to make you think you owed me anything." He was cute when he got flustered, she thought

"I know you didn't, but communication between partners, right?" She paused for a few minutes as she locked on his eyes, "I married my college sweetheart, at the time it seemed like the right thing to do, but once we were married things changed, I became an object, it became almost as if he owned me and when he hit me for the first time, I made sure it was the last. The marriage was over in less than six months, and thank God no kids were involved." She looked into his eyes, sadly smiled.

"I'm sorry Karen that you had to go through that, no woman should ever feel that way, and God help any male who tired that stuff with my daughter. I don't get angry often but mess with someone I love and I go ballistic, it's not pretty I've been told, I don't remember it." He said, as he played with her fingers, then quickly stopped, as they both said silently 'rules' and laughed.

"Rick, I saw you making notes from the case file, do you have any educated guesses about what happened to Mary Jo, I know we just sent the file to Doctor Parish, but any thoughts?"

"Well, when you told me that the husband had been messing around with the Lacey twins, that much is documented, and the rumor that the mother was in on the action as well it got me to thinking. What would motivate someone to kill a new bride, especially one who appeared to be so quiet and non-threatening as Mary Jo was?

"If the husband didn't kill her, and that would be extremely difficult seeing that he was in front of a judge in municipal court, who did? It had to be someone who had lost something or assumed that she cost them something.

"When you mentioned the Lacey twins' mother was divorced, I checked her out, she's dating one of the plastic surgeons supposedly now. That made me think the wound could have been caused by a surgical scalpel, easily stolen from her new boyfriends' practice.

"I reviewed her divorce and because of the infidelity clause in their pre-nuptials, she got a fraction of what she would have for any other reason. I think somewhere the reports mentioned a wedding gift unwrapped found at the scene.

"If I were writing this scene in my book, I would have the former Mrs. Lacey come over, with a gift in hand, as a ruse to get Mary Jo to open the door and when I handed it to her, and her hands were full, it would be simple to slip the scalpel from my pocket and inflict the wounds."

Rick watched as a look of horror came over Karen's face,

"Come on Rick, we need to get back to the precinct, I think we have DNA on file for Mrs. Lacey when she resisted arrest for drunk and disorderly and tried to spit on an officer. The Spit Mask is in evidence as well as the wedding gift package in the reports, if they match then you've solved the murder.

"The question is why?" Why would she kill Mary Jo, that was before I investigated and found her in the romper room playing house with someone other than her husband." Karen was upset but also on a mission,

"Well, you said it was only rumored that Terry Keding was including the mother in his flings, if he broke it off, perhaps she didn't take the rejection as well as her daughters did. The old if I can't have him you won't either, attitude. There's no need to bring Terry into this, not if you have the package, and the spit mask provided DNA can be retrieved and they match, I mean it's just a writer's theory." Rick said shyly,

"Rick, don't do that, please. Don't discount the work you just did and gave us our first solid lead in this case, complete with motive. You're a hell of a criminologist, screw the degrees, you just put a series of unconnected events to form a logical and believable scenario. Let's see if we can nail this bitch" she said as her eyes blazed.

Chapter 7

Kate Beckett's Apartment

7:52 PM Same Day

Lanie was standing outside Kate's apartment still trying to figure out how she was going to break this news to her friend. She had confessed last night, well if Lanie remembered, that she indeed had feelings for the writer but was afraid to tell him.

She was hurt by the Ellie Monroe incident, even though Lanie reminded her she was standing right there when he took the call, and he even asked should he pursue something, she gave him the green light.

The idea of holding Kyra Blaine against him was more than ridiculous, it happened when he was in college for God's sake, long before Kate even knew he existed. What if Rick would hold her first boyfriend against her? She finally got her to see that she was wrong, but that was last night, alcohol was present, in a big way. Would she still agree today? Especially when she had to tell her about Detective Karen Pedersen.

She even pulled a color photo from the employee database, and even though it was old, it still showed the lady's beauty. The full profile also revealed what Javi was blabbering about, even a police uniform couldn't hide those puppies, she certainly had a set of Ta Tas.

One more reason for Kate to feel inferior, another drunken confession how she was jealous of girls with boobs, including her, Ann Hastings, and especially Roz Karpowski. Well if she was jealous of Roz, this set was going to put her into orbit, even Lanie was a bit envious. Lanie had her work cut out for her even with a gallon of Butter Pecan Ice Cream and a dozen of fresh doughnuts, screw the diet tonight.

She knocked on the door, and in less than two minutes Kate opened the door, red-eyed as if she had been crying, and her hair thrown up in a messy bun. She apparently had done what she had done, showered and put on the minimal of clothes, looking to be comfortable.

"Hey Kate, sorry to take up your evening again, but maybe I will be able to remember more than 20-minute segments of tonight. Boy yesterday was a bitch, and I paid dearly for it. Guess drinking is for the college kids, well in the quantity we did anyway." she said as Kate made a hand motion for her to enter.

"It's OK Lanes, you said you and Javi were talking and it didn't go so well, I'm sorry, not sure what I can do to help but, hey, before we talk, I want a doughnut and a dish of ice-cream, that always makes things seem better even if they're not," she said with a weak smile,

Kate must not have eaten since the dry toast earlier this morning, she scarfed two of the sprinkled doughnuts down in a flash and was going to town on her ice cream. At least she would have something in her system, she may lose it once the news broke, but Lanie could only hope.

Lanie was deliberately taking her time, still searching for the best way, hell any way she could tell Kate about the latest Castle developments. She still bristled over why Roy would pass along false information unless he was following orders from the Mayor. Kate picked up that something was wrong with her friend,

"So even the ice cream isn't working, must have been a very tough conversation, I'm sorry Lanie," Kate said softly,

"Well, what's with your red eyes, your new fashion statement, what did you do go back and read everything Castle ever wrote, don't tell me you haven't been crying Kate Beckett, I'll smack you" Lanie got out,

Kate smiled, "well, it wasn't so much of what he wrote, it's my Castle drawer, every little thing he's ever given me I've saved, including the ticket stubs to the male strip club we had to pay to get in to question one suspect, stupid I know, I save this stuff, but never tell him how I feel." Kate confessed,

"I remember that day, you chewed that poor boy's ass out for that, told him to never do that again, whatever he did to protect you, something to do with a fire extinguisher," Lanie said,

"I yelled at him but secretly I hadn't had a man stick up for me as he did in quite a while, even without a gun he was determined to take care of my safety," She said as she looked sadly out the window.

"Yeah, about that Kate, actually I told a bit of lie to get over here," She said, as Kate's face turned a different color,

"What's going on Lanie, you and Javi didn't have a talk?" she asked,

"No, that was true, but he told me some very disturbing news, he and Ryan got into a hell of an argument about what to do, so finally they decided that it would be best if you heard it from me," Lanie said and stopped waiting for the outburst,

"Heard what Lanie? How did Javi hear something that is going to be so upsetting to me?" Kate asked her face still puzzled to as what was really going on.

"Sit down honey, this is going to be shocking to you, I know it was me. Please once I start the story let me get through it then you can ask questions, I'll tell you if I know, but I really don't know more than what Javi and I talked about.

"Well Javi got sent over to the 18th precinct this afternoon, seems there was a murder when I was out with the flu, and Perlmutter refused to return from his fishing trip so the ME from Albany did the autopsy, and botched it big time. It's a cold case and now they found the findings don't match the reports"

"Lanie that's interesting, sad but interesting but how the hell does this affect me?" She asked a little prissy, getting only the patented roll, in return.

"May I continue? She paused until she received a head nod from Kate and a soft 'sorry', "As I was saying, the photos' don't match the reports, I have to reexamine the files when I go back to work, top priority, but it's what else that happened that was the kick in the teeth.

"Detective Karen Pedersen is heading the investigation, you may know her, I think she was in the Academy class behind you, anyway Javi was going on and on about what a good-looking woman she was with great assets", Lanie shoved the older photo over to Kate and could tell Kate knew her or at least of her through her body language.

"Javi, got the surprise of his life when she asked her partner to give him the file, and when the man turned around it was Rick, our Rick, AKA, Castle. Javi almost fainted he said so he asked him what the hell was he doing at the 18th playing cop.

"Detective Pedersen corrected him quickly that he wasn't playing a cop, he was her new partner, and the new findings in the cold case had come from his investigation or words to that effect. Rick told Javi he didn't know where he got the bullshit story of him not coming back until after the book completion and first tour, he said flat out he wasn't coming back period. Javi tried to press him, but Rick dismissed him and actually waved two uniforms over to escort him out of the building.

"Honey, I'm sorry but Javi actually saw them interact, and he said there was definitely something going on between the two of them, the chemistry was too loud to ignore. He felt bad, but thought you still had Demming to fall back on, when I told him that was over, he pleaded with me to tell you in a private setting, they didn't want you to hear about it once we went back to work. I'm sorry, but that's all I know"

Kate was quiet as she looked at the picture then her bookshelf of Castle novels, then out the window, then back to the picture.

"Thanks, Lanie, but why should I care WHAT or should I say WHO Castle is doing. It's not that we had anything between us, he's free to screw anyone he wants, he probably does anyway." She said just as the tears began to fall, and Lanie hugged her,

"You don't mean that Kate Beckett and you know it, you said far too much last night that I remember that makes me know you're crazy about the man," Lanie said as she held her friend,

"A lot of good that's going to do me now, Javi is like an old lady, he picks up all the gossip and if he says they're connected then I believe him. I mean I got so mad at Castle some days, but other days he was so sweet I just wanted to hold him, how he can go from one extreme to the other I have no idea." Kate whined,

"Kate, are you sure it was him or was it you not allowing yourself time to enjoy life, I'm betting it was you. Look, solving your Mom's case shouldn't rob you of your entire life, your Mom wouldn't want that, your Dad doesn't so Kate when are you going to wake up and give yourself permission to be happy in life."

"Wait, Lanie, that's not fair, I mean I have a life" Kate pleaded, once again met with the eye roll,

"Do you? Cartons of takeout, if not that meals from the bodega, when was the last time you were out on a date, and I'm not talking about screwing Demming after a burger at Remy's, I meal a real genuine date." She asked,

"I guess, when Castle and I went to LeCerque after the ball at the embassy, he said it would be a shame to waste the gown, and it was still early. It's funny it didn't seem like a date, I mean it was Castle, but I do remember laughing a lot, he had me cracking up the entire evening. "Kate said looking out the window trying to recall,

"AND?" Lanie simply asked

"And what Lanie?" Kate looked at her as if she were crazy,

"And, what happened after dinner, I mean no goodnight kiss, no nothing, no thank you Castle, for the designer gown that cost a month of my salary, nothing Kate?"

"Actually, his car service brought us back here, but I wouldn't let him get out, or walk me to the door, I think I just said Thanks Castle, good catch on the perp" and left him in his town car. Kate said as she hung her head, "I didn't even thank him for the most expensive dress I've ever owned,"

"Oh, Kate, you didn't just dismiss him, not after all he did to make your night so special, tell me you didn't?" Lanie looked on pleadingly,

Kate's head went down and she mumbled, "That's exactly what I did, I even returned Martha's jewelry she loaned me early the next morning, I knew he would just be getting up, and we wouldn't have to talk about the night before."

"Girl, what does that boy have to do to show you how he feels, well how he felt, if Javi is right, he's cut his losses with you and Demming and moved on, that's what everyone at the precinct thought you wanted, you said it enough times."

"I got what I thought I wanted Lanie, but how do I undo the mess I made? Kate's tears begun to fall,

"I don't know if you can, if Javi is close to what is really going on, it may be too late Kate, I'm so sorry" Lannie whispered,

XxX

18th Precinct

Two Hours Later

Karen and Rick had returned to the precinct and requested the files on the mother of the Lacey twins, now known as Elizabeth Lacey Stork, her maiden name she had reverted back to after the scandalous divorce.

The NYPD had run the DNA swabbing on the spit mask as a matter of precaution, spitting on a police officer was assault and battery, and carried a more severe punishment than just simple resisting. She was connected to some powerful people so they took all precautions. Now if that DNA was a match to that on the package found and processed at the crime scene, Mary Jo would get her justice.

The files were on a separate floor and it took some time to get the copies to the central lab, not located in the same building as the precinct, but finally, the call they had been waiting for came. The DNA on the package matched that of the DNA retrieved from the spit mask of Miss. Stork's arrest with the exclusion that only 1 out of 99,000,000 or million people, making it as close to a 100% match that Karen had ever seen.

When she got the call from the lab, she placed it on speaker as her entire team of 5 detectives and Rick gathered around her, once the news was received, she fell into Rick's arms crying. The co-lead detective on the case, Gary Igala took over and thanked the lab, and began to process the arrest warrant for Elizabeth Lacey Stork for first-degree murder.

"Karen, why don't you let Rick take you home, we know how close you were to Mary Jo, and hey she's finally getting her justice, we got this from here." He motioned Rick to take her home,

"Karen, I know I'm new to this, but another good point is we don't want the defense attorney to poke holes in the case saying you had a vendetta against her, it was your investigation that caused her divorce, rightly so. Let's just be sure we cross all the t's on this one, OK?" Rick asked her gently

"You're right Rick, I never thought of that, but I want that bitch to pay for killing Mary Jo, let's get out of here," as she shut her computer down. Gary mouthed to Rick, "Take Care of Her" and Rick nodded, knowing that even as tough as she was this was too close to home to just process as another case.

"Rick's right Karen, plus we need to debunk her I was on a cruise alibi, I think that party will fall just as soon as they hear the penalty for obstruction or complacency to felony murder," Gary said,

Rick had called his car service, so there was no waiting when they waved goodnight to Ralph and stepped outside into the waiting limo.

"I thought we would go to the loft and I would pick up some clothes to change, that is if you still want to start our running tomorrow?" he looked like a little boy,

She took his hand, and smiled, the first since the case had been solved, "Of course I want to start our running, you've already added thousands of calories that I need to burn off, she gently touched his nose with hers."

Just as Rick was about to reciprocate, Karen's phone buzzed, and a second later so did Rick's. Looking at their phones, it was a group text from Roy,

"GREAT job on the case, one cold case, one murder solved, you two take the next three days off, I already told Captain Vance Karen, so enjoy yourselves. I'm really happy to be able to close a case close to one of our own, you can let go now Karen, it's over. Talk soon, Roy"

"Karen, how about instead of my getting some clothes to stash at your place, we start this run off tomorrow from my place. We can swing by your place pick up what you need, and tomorrow is Saturday so Alexis would love to go shopping to buy what you need if you forget it. Don't worry, no funny business, I have three guest rooms, I promise" Rick said shyly,

"You know Rick, I think shopping therapy, especially with Alexis IF she's free, I mean you didn't ask her, how do you know she doesn't already have plans," Karen said, still holding on to his finger,

"Why don't you text her and see for yourself, that way you'll know I didn't force it." Rick smiled as Karen pulled her phone back out,

"Hey Alexis, it's Karen, your Dad and I solved a case and got a few days off, are you up for shopping tomorrow?" she texted,

A minute later her phone buzzed, with the answer

A group of smiley emojis and then a big "YES, Make Dad bring you over, we have plenty of room you can stay the night, I'll make Dad behave, and we can get an early start tomorrow after you and Dad get back from your run, how does that sound? PLEASE come, "

"Sounds like a plan, I think your Dad and I are going to make dinner at the loft, are you going to be home tonight?

"I am NOW, wouldn't miss it for the world, if you forget something don't worry, we have extras of about everything for the guest rooms, see you soon, thanks for thinking of me, it's going to be fun,"

She texted back, "Yes it will, and thanks for asking me with a big smiley emoji, on our way now, see you soon"

"I guess I'm going shopping after our run tomorrow, it's just what I need to get out with a sweetheart like Alexis, I know it's going to be fun. You really are an amazing Dad Rick, she's so much like you," Karen said, as she just leaned into his side.

Rick changed locations for the driver and accompanied Karen up to her Condo, but waited for her to invite him in, she looked up and saw him standing in the hall,

"What are you doing out there, get in here, you don't need an invitation," she smiled, I'll be back in a few minutes, just want to be sure I have something that doesn't say I AM A SLUT to wear in front of your daughter, I don't want her to get the wrong impression."

"She's mature enough to know you would never be a slut Karen, so just take what is comfortable for you, and don't forget your running shoes," he said with a smile,

"Good idea, I was about to, as she grabbed a gym bag with all her running gear and clothing."

Fifteen minutes later they pulled into the private entrance of the loft, she had almost fallen asleep, Rick felt and smelt so good as she laid her head on his shoulder and relaxed, he could always relax her just by playing with her fingers, or gently rubbing her arms, he was becoming her calming force she had never had before.

She heard him gently whisper, "Karen we're home sweetie, if you want to open your eyes," home, what a beautiful word, especially when his smile greeted her when she did open her eyes, it felt right, the whole damn world felt a little better now,

Chapter 8

Castle's Loft

4:52 PM Same Day

Karen and Rick were in the kitchen as Alexis walked through the door, she stopped and watched as her Dad was taking instructions from Karen, he was pounding a piece of meat, with a cleaver as Karen prepared a flour, egg dip on the counter right beside him. Alexis thought if only Kate had made him half as happy, but then she thought, she hadn't seen him this relaxed being himself in a very long time. She finally made some noise as they began to get flirty putting flour on each other's noses. She smiled as she coughed,

They turned, both in aprons, and her dad definitely had lost the flour fight, Karen had a bit on the end of her nose, they both looked like teens caught making out.

"Sorry Alexis I didn't hear you come in, I was just showing your dad how to make authentic chicken fried steak, not the stuff you get in restaurants." Karen smiled,

"Well, if he was supposed to flour the meat after it was tenderized, he missed and got his nose" she smiled, knowing that the two adults now had relaxed and were back to themselves.

"She's really a great cook Alexis if you want to learn I'm sure she would be willing to let you in on some of her family secret recipes," Rick said with a big grin,

"Dad, that's your way to get information that she isn't giving you, I'm ashamed of you using your poor child as a pawn in such a scheme. She started laughing which got Karen laughing, such a beautiful laugh,

"Let me change clothes Karen, and I'll be right down, it doesn't look like your helper is pulling his weight over there" as she bounded up the stairs,

Karen looked over at Rick, took a cloth, and wiped the flour off his nose, "Do you think she saw that?"

"Definitely she saw it" Rick answered quietly,

"Do you think she's OK with us, I mean cooking together, I know that's something you two do most of the time" Karen asked,

A voice from behind, "She's fine with you guys cooking and having fun Karen, as long as Dad is enjoying himself and you can put up with his childish pranks, just so no one gets hurt, he gets carried away sometimes and forgets that he's getting older." She laughed,

"Oh, Daughter how you wound me, I'll get you for that," He replied.

Alexis took his apron and placed it around herself.

"You were paying more attention to Karen's eyes than you were the recipe so let me in so I can learn this, it looks like it will be delicious."

Karen blushed then said, "I hope you like it, Alexis, it's not hard to make, and we should be ready to eat within a half-hour or so."

"That's good, Dad gets grumpy when he gets hungry or stressed, but he's having fun, I haven't seen him this happy in a long time." She smiled at Karen, who just blushed

Rick was setting the place settings and right on Karen's estimate, 32 minutes later she was bringing the chicken fried steak, rice, and southern style green beans with homemade rolls to the table. It all smelled heavenly. Rick got the drinks and they sat down to the first meal that included all three of them.

"So how was your day daughter" Rick asked, it appeared to be a common question Karen thought as she observed the easy banter back and forth, she was surprised when Alexis chose to include her in the conversation,

"So, Karen you and Dad solved a cold case today, that's fantastic. I hope he was helpful and didn't get in your way," she smiled

"Actually Alexis, you should be very proud of your Dad, he was the one that solved the case, it was a murder of a friend of mine, and he went the extra mile to find the answer. Long story short, they are arresting the woman who killed her for no reason other than jealousy" Karen looked a little sad.

"Well, thanks for including me in your conversation about work Karen, just think though now you and all that loved your friend can move on, I know that's not the same as having her still here, but at least the evil person who did the crime has been caught, not sure if that helps, but I hope it does," Alexis said softly,

"Alexis, I should be thanking you that was such a mature and lovely thing to say, it's a great reminder that justice was served, and Thank You for allowing your Dad to be part of it, I'm keeping him safe I promise you." She smiled,

"I know he told me how he was regulated to desk duty, or couldn't go into the field until the entire crime scene had been processed and you were sure the bad guys were either captured or away from the sight. They does make Grams and I both worry a great deal less about Dad, but Karen, we worry about you as well, you be sure you are taking every safety precaution, please?"

"That's really sweet Alexis, it's been quite a while since I had anyone to worry about my safety, but I promise you, I'll take the same steps as I make your Dad, OK?" Karen was truly touched by the young lady being so open and honest. She was totally surprised that they worried about her safety, they had only met a short while before, such a lovely family she thought.

"What time are you and Dad going running tomorrow, Dad's usual time? The stores don't open until 9:00 so we have plenty of time if you want to grab a light breakfast when you get back then we can meet Dad someplace for lunch when we get shopped out, how does that sound?" Alexis asked,

"That sounds like a plan to me, we're starting the run at 6:00 AM so we will be back in plenty of time for me to grab a shower and energy bar or yogurt I spotted already in the fridge." She replied,

"Well, it's almost 8:00 so if I'm going to get any homework done, I better get to it. I'm saying goodnight and I'll see you in the morning if you need anything, my door is the first door on the left, your room is right across from me. I hope you rest well." She crossed the room, hugged Rick, and said, "Good job today Dad, proud of you, Good night," as she kissed him on the cheek and headed up the stairs,

"Good night sweetie, see you in the morning" then Karen called out, "Thanks for inviting me to go shopping, good night, see you tomorrow"

Rick and Karen retired to the couch with some soft music on, it turned out that Karen was crazy about the oldies, and loved the CD of various artists Rick had put on. He handed her a glass of wine and sat down beside her.

"Hell, of a day, today," He said,

"That is was, but like Alexis said Rick, I'm very proud of my partner, my friend, my well, I know you made a lot of people sleep better tonight, so thank you from all of us, she kissed his cheek gently."

"Well, it's easy when you have a great partner, and an even better new friend, thank you for making me feel so welcome, it allowed me to get lost in the case and come up with those crazy writer scenarios, luckily, one of them fit and we had the facts to prove it"

"Rick, please stop doing that, please for me. It's almost like you feel like you don't deserve the praise, but believe me, without you, that would still be a cold case and Mary Jo would still not have justice.

"Yes, I like you, a lot, but when it comes to police work, nothing comes in the way and you solved this one Rick, please don't beat yourself down. Let me brag on you, let me be proud to be your partner, your friend, your … her lips found his in a sweet kiss to end the sentence"

"I'm sorry, I guess it's a force of habit, and thank you for that ending, I liked whatever that was. I know we started off with instant chemistry, well at least for me, and I hope for you as well, but I want to slow things down just a bit. I want you to be absolutely sure before you get totally invested in this partner.

"I won't do anything to hurt you, I promise, and nothing has changed God, I still want to kiss you for hours but I want to get to know the real Karen, and for you to know me. I don't want to be a burning flame for a month and burn out, I want something more. God, I'm probably scaring the hell out of you now." As he looked over and saw the tears in her eyes,

She turned to look at him, "Actually Rick, I wanted to say the same thing, but I was afraid you would think I didn't want an us, but to be an us, we need to find out who each other are. I know we aren't going to agree on everything, but can we fight nice, and resolve our differences IF we ever have conflict?

"I mean I want to be your best friend, your partner, and let it see what the next step is, and I'm so happy you had the courage to put that out there I just have one question."

"What's that sweetie?"

"Can we still kiss, I mean like we did, I don't want to take it to the next step yet, I've only been with one man my entire life, and he was my husband. I'm sorry if that throws cold water on you, but I wanted you to know the score, and not come off like some prick tease." She was shaking with fear,

Rick pulled her in tight, "Karen, we can take this as fast or as slow as you like, I'm in no hurry. I think it's far more admirable than you know to have the virtues you practice; it makes me consider you even more special than I first thought." He barely got the words out until the necking session began, and true to his word, it remained just that. She was far too important to him to risk losing,

She finally went to bed after the fourth try of saying goodnight to him, as he sat and waved, to her,

"I'll knock on your door if you're not up tomorrow, Good Night Karen, pleasant dreams" as he blew her a kiss, she caught it, and returned her own to him, "Good night Rick"

XxX

Sweeney's Bar and Grill

11:00 PM Same Day

Javier Esposito had arrived at the bar after he had left Lanie, he was careful to measure his intake of alcohol and pace himself. He was there to take care of some business, and he needed to be completely sober, or at least 90% so to ensure he did the job right.

It was precisely at 11:02 PM when he saw Demming walk in with another in his line of babes that he used his role as a Detective to impress. Usually, Javi could care less what his former friend from the 54th did, but he crossed a line last night, one that needed to be avenged.

Demming walked up to the bar as if nothing had happened, and greeted Javi,

"Hey little man, how's it hanging, why are you in these parts of the city at this hour of the night, you live clear across town."

"Well, you see Tom, we have or at least had a mutual friend, one I made the mistake of introducing to you, and it seems like things didn't go so well, and you happen to call her a name last night. Why don't you kiss your new girlfriend goodnight before you and I head out into the alley to settle this like men."

"You can't be serious Esposito, you want to take me on, for what? I called your friend a B"

"Finish that word Demming, and it will be the last one you speak for a while, now say good night to your girlfriend, I have the lookouts posted if you have the balls to answer my challenge" Espo spit out,

Javi knew he wouldn't back down in front of the new girl he was hoping to get lucky with, he was correct,

"Why don't you enjoy a drink sweetheart while I go teach this immigrant some manners, I'll be back in a few minutes," Demming said as he leaned into the girl,

They stepped out into the alley behind the bar, true to his word there were cops all around the place to keep it a fair fist fight, no guns, or knives, or interference from any bystanders.

"Take the first swing Demming, you seem so confident you can teach this as you called me immigrant, some manners, let's see what you got."

Tom made the first mistake of any fight, he lost his temper and tried to sucker punch Javi with a roundhouse right hand. It was easily caught and everyone could hear the bone break as Javi used an armbar and broke his arm as Tom shrieked in pain.

Now came the lesson, as Javi painted his fists against Tom's face, with each punch spelling a letter of the word that cost Tom an ass beating. B was yelled, as he closed his right eye with a powerful right hand, I, he yelled as he busted his lip open, the weapon was a left jab.

T Javi yelled and the left eye was now closing courtesy of a right cross, C Javi screamed as he busted his nose with a right uppercut and blood flew everywhere as he reeled back against the dumpster, one final yell of H,

I'm giving you a warning Demming, come close to, or say anything to my friend again and I will make this look like a warm-up session as he broke his jaw and then unwrapped his knuckles and calmly went into the bar to finish his beer, pay his tab and leave. The cops keeping an eye out waited for Javi to leave then called 9-1-1 and left with the phone off the hook.

The paramedics arrived some twenty minutes later to an empty alley, no one had seen anything, but Tom verbally abusing some smaller guy then they headed into the alley. From the police report, Demming picked the fight, and then got his ass kicked to boot. He was transported to NY Presbyterian Hospital Emergency Room to have his arm set, and wounds treated. He left a few hours later with his jaw wired shut, and his arm in a sling, much like his career was going to be when the Captain saw the police report.

XxX

Kate Beckett's Apartment

Later Same Evening

Lanie had pushed the last sprinkle doughnut in front of Kate, who had eaten it, probably without even knowing it. She sat in almost a trance,

"Why would Roy lie to me, to us, Lanie? It doesn't make sense unless Rick was going somewhere that he didn't want us to know about and it was a cover story." Kate asked, searching for any explanation for Castle's sudden reappearance at the 18th Precinct.

"I don't know sweetie, I'm sure Roy will tell you IF you approach him and ask not go into his office all hurt and upset, he probably was following orders from the mayor, you know how tight he and Rick are" Lanie was throwing any guess she could out at this point.

"You're right Lanie, Roy is a good cop and takes orders, I'm sure he would have told me if he could. Maybe things changed once Rick got to the 18th and decided he didn't need the cover story.

"The one thing that hurts though Lanie, he told Javi he wasn't coming back to the 12th, like in forever. I mean we worked two years together, you think I would deserve a proper goodbye" she whined and was greeted with an eye roll and a blank stare from her friend.

"Kate Beckett you paraded another man, a cop, and from what I heard wasn't shy in reminding Rick, that he wasn't one, all the time showing the physical side of affection and bragging about how good the man was in bed, and you wonder why the man just left?

"Turn the situation around, what if, all of a sudden Roz and Rick were getting it on, hot and heavy and all you had to hear was how big her boobs were or how she made him scream in bed, you wouldn't have waited as long as Rick did until you left, and without a trace of where you went. Tell me I'm wrong, just prove it?" Lanie was letting her have it again,

"You're right Lanie," Kate hung her head, "But what do I do now, how do I tell him the truth?" she said sadly

"You may not get the chance Kate if he's moved on, and I wouldn't blame him, I'm your friend, but girl, everyone deserves to be happy, if you had no interest you could have let the boy down without doing what you did.

"I understand you think you had the right because of Ellie, but he practically begged you to tell him not to go, but you gave him a green light, no interest at all. Girl, he's a man, when a good-looking lady is putting it out there, is single, no attachments why wouldn't he go for the gold. Hell, I would have jumped on that quicker than you let Demming into your bed." She rolled her eyes for effect,

"But what do I do Lanie, I mean, he probably thinks I'm with Tom, who was a mistake, a big mistake, what do I do now? She asked tears coming to her eyes,

"Something you don't do often Kate, something you hate to do more than almost anything," Lanie said, pausing for effect,

"What Lanie, I don't understand," Kate asked,

"You need to apologize and mean it, make him believe it IF you get the chance. You have his phone number, call him, hell if you're too big of a coward then text him, hell send smoke signals but girl, you owe him an apology. And Kate, when you go in to talk to Roy, lose your attitude, or you'll wind up in more trouble, he's your friend, but never forget, he's also your boss."

"You're right Lanie," Kate said as she absent-mindedly reached for the doughnuts when she hadn't finished the one on her plate, staring out the window.

Chapter 9

Castle's Loft

5:52 AM Next Morning

Rick slipped quietly out of his bedroom, all dressed and ready to head out for his daily run, when he realized there was a light in the kitchen. It was Karen, looking beautiful in her running gear, her body complimented by the soft light coming from the refrigerator as she peeked inside. He watched as she retrieved an individual serving size bottle of orange juice and grabbed two water bottles. He didn't think she knew he was there, then he heard,

"Good Morning Rick, sleep well?" in her sweet voice,

"Good Morning Karen, yes, I did as a matter of fact how about you?

"I slept great, orange juice before we head out? I grabbed a couple of waters for us," She smiled as she handed Rick the small orange juice along with the tall water bottle. They both downed the OJ and placed the bottles in the recycle bin, then headed out the door.

The ride down on the elevator allowed them time to kiss, well a few kisses as Rick said he needed the extra energy and laughed.

Once they hit the street level, Karen held back and let Rick lead the way to his normal jogging path, as she joined beside him when the room on the path allowed. Rick usually ran three miles to the park, then walked a half-mile, then reversed his direction giving him a good six miles of run, and a mile walk. He walked the last quarter mile to allow the body temperatures to cool down, and prevent cramping.

Karen met his step, each one in tandem, she even had the breath to talk,

"So how far are we running Rick, just so I can pace myself, I don't want to embarrass myself the first time out with you" then the beautiful laugh, more lovely than the birds that were singing this hour of the morning.

"I usually run to the park entrance, then walk about a half-mile, then reverse course, is that all right for you Karen?" Rick asked as he turned his head to the side to take in the lovely lady running beside him.

"Sounds good to me, I think that's within my capacity, and I need to burn off those damn doughnuts you keep bringing me, not that I'm telling you to stop, they're delicious, besides it gives me an excuse to do this with you." Karen smiled, even in the dim light of the sun just rising, Rick could see the glow on her face, she seemed to be as happy as he was.

They both jogged effortlessly through the first part, when they reached the entrance to the park, Rick reached out and took her hand as they slowed to a walk, she didn't let go, instead, it was she who interlaced their fingers this time and turned and kissed him softly as they walked.

They were lost in each other presence, just talking, smiling, and enjoying their time together they both missed the female jogger who was headed in their direction but suddenly veered off course to go down a bike trail, not recommended during daylight hours but at this hour it was virtually deserted.

They reversed their course and began their jog home. The jogger watched it all from a distance, as she retrieved a tissue and wiped her eyes, she allowed them to get far enough ahead so as to not be spotted. Neither noticed Kate Beckett jogging behind them at a safe distance, even with her NYPD blue hoodie that she had pulled up over her head when she first spotted the two together.

She recognized Karen from the picture Lanie had brought over, and she was indeed, as Javi had put it, built like a brick shithouse, no bricks missing. Damn Kate really hated women with boobs, especially natural ones, she couldn't even blame it on their vanity to purchase them, they were all-natural. She followed behind them until she saw them disappear into the loft, what the hell?

Was she sleeping over now? Damn, Rick, you didn't let any grass grow under the rock before you completely replaced me, did you, she thought, then knew how judgmental that was, she was the one that brought in a boyfriend to drive a wedge between them. She continued her jog past the loft, looking back to see a light come on in the loft, then a perfect silhouette of them kissing. Like a hard slap to the face she finally admitted it to herself, it was true, she was history, her tears fell as she made her way home to lick her wounds in private.

Karen broke the kiss, "As much as I love to do this, I'm icky, sweaty and I have a previous engagement I need to get ready for with another member of the Castle household", she smiled, looking at his little boy pout,

"Oh, don't pout, I'll be back soon, no wait, you're joining us for lunch when Alexis and I get all shopped out," she kissed him again, "BUT I do need my shower, so I'll be back in a few minutes," she couldn't leave him without stealing one more kiss, this one with just a slight bit of tongue to get his motor revved up,

"OK, I'm going to shower and make some edits to the book, I think I have a new angle for it, so I'll see you in a bit," he blew her a kiss as she was already on the stairs,

Thirty minutes later Rick heard a familiar knock on his office door, "Come in pumpkin," he replied, finishing the approval of the latest edits from Gina. It wasn't worth fighting for, he just wanted to get Heat Wave done, published, then possible switch gears. He certainly didn't plan on seeing the original muse for the story again,

"Dad, we're on our way, Karen or I will call you when we get close to finishing, anything special you want for lunch?" He looked up and saw his daughter and Karen smiling behind her,

"Hey, I want a goodbye kiss, I know you're getting too big for me to call you my pet name, but you'll always be my girl, that won't change." Alexis kissed him on the cheek, and it was funny, she had led Karen in by the hand.

"I won't look, Karen, it's your turn" as she turned her back and put her hands over her eyes, Karen didn't waste it, and whispered to him after a sweet kiss, "I'll see you soon, miss you."

"You bet, miss you too," as Alexis said "OK, we're gone" and out the door, they went.

XxX

Kate continued her jog until she reached her apartment building, mercifully there was no one around to see that she had cried the duration of her run. She had no one to blame, no one to be angry at, this was one defeat she owned all by herself. True she had a great supporting cast in Demming and Esposito, but she could have, hell she should have stopped the harassment when it first started not join in.

She jumped into the shower, one place she could cry and not have to admit, even to herself that she was crying over the writer. Kate Beckett didn't cry over men, never had and she wasn't about to start now.

As she was showering Lanie's words came back to her, "Have you tried to call and apologize, Kate hell if you're that big of a coward send him a text, the man deserves an apology, regardless of how things work out."

Lanie was correct, of course, she was, she thought well she had today then she was back on duty or on call for ten straight days so if she was going to apologize, now was the time. How should she do it, a text seemed too cold, a call, he could hang up on her, that wouldn't give her the ending she needed.

She thought hell, he never listened to me. How many times did he show up at my place, I'll go over there and if she's there, I'll just ask for five minutes and leave. Rick wasn't rude, he never would be, she knew that and was counting on his good manners for her plan to work.

She got dressed, put her hair back up in a slightly less sloppy bun than it had been, applied makeup, God did she really have that many wrinkles settling in, she needed to take better care of herself, and quickly grabbed her keys, phone, and gun and existed before she lost her nerve.

She decided to walk to Castle's loft, to give her time to plan out what she was going to say. Her mind raced, Hey Castle, just heard you hooked up with a hot detective at the 18th, and you guys are hitting it off. Why don't you drop her and come back to the 12th, you're my partner, not hers? Sure, she's got boobs but I've got, eh, eh, yeah Kate, what do you have? Stick to the apology and let him decide where he wants to work, if at all.

She arrived at his building and went directly to the guest service desk to ensure she hadn't been banned from the building, it wouldn't surprise her if he had, the way she had treated him was more horrible with each replay in her mind and she needed to be sincere in her apology, he would see through the lip service.

"Detective Beckett, you're on Mr. Castle's approved visitor list, shall I announce your arrival mam?" Eduardo said in his soft friendly voice,

"No, I'd like to surprise him if I may, thank you, Eduardo, you've been very helpful" as she headed to the elevators and punched in his floor, and the key code, he hadn't changed it. When the elevator stopped on his floor, she stepped off, and froze, what if SHE were there? What if Alexis wouldn't let her talk to her father? What If, Hell Kate get your ass in gear and apologize leave the what-ifs to the rock star want to bees.

She knocked timidly on his door and didn't hear any response, perhaps he wasn't home after all, but Eduardo said he was. She knocked again, slightly louder and this time she heard rustling coming from a distance, she paced, and a few moments later, Rick opened the door, dressed in casual jeans, loafers, and a light blue pullover shirt that showed off the work he had been putting in at the gym,

"Beckett? Obviously very surprised to see her, when he recovered, he asked, what can I help you with?" he asked, not hatefully, but not in his welcoming voice she had grown accustomed to.

"Well, I owe you an apology, a sincere apology and I wanted to deliver it the same way I did the insults to your face. I have to tell you, I thought more than once about just sending a text or leaving you a voice mail. I know I hurt you, I allowed others to do so also, and I wanted to ask you to forgive me. May I come in Rick; I won't take much of your time?"

She could tell that the last thing he wanted to do was allow her entrance to his home, but he couldn't be rude, no matter how upset he was with her.

"I have an appointment Detective, so let's keep this short" as he opened the door fully allowing her to step inside the door.

"I'm sorry Rick, I know I shouldn't have come by without asking but I was afraid you were so hurt and angry at me that you wouldn't have said yes. As I said, I know the Demming incident was an"

"Detective, I wasn't hurt or angry at you, I had another project I was asked to take on, someone who really needed and wanted my help. I felt like a third wheel with your team, and it was very obvious to everyone that there was only one voice you were listening to. Hey, he's a cop, and your boyfriend, so no hard feelings. It was time for me to get out of your hair before you had to shoot me, as you had threatened to do so many times." Rick replied but the kidding tone was missing, he was serious.

"If you weren't upset with me, why didn't you say goodbye, Rick, I mean we are partners, we've worked together for over two years, didn't I deserve at least a goodbye?" She asked, losing control of her voice and emotions,

"First of all, we're not partners, we really never were, secondly, you were at an extended lunch and I was asked to start the next project that afternoon. What good would hanging around to say so long, it's been nice, what would that have done, even if you had paid enough attention to hear what I was saying. I said goodbye to those I could." He replied, still steady, no emotions showing in his voice at all,

"Rick, cut the bullshit, I know your next project is working over at the 18th precinct with a female detective named Karen Pedersen, and I know" she was interrupted,

"Be careful Detective, you may want to check with your Captain before you start to jump to conclusions, but really it's none of your business, I think that's what you said to me a few times. What I do, who I do it with, or where is not your concern.

"You couldn't wait to get rid of me, so why all the second thoughts now? You have your boy toy, what is with you, do you want to control every man you see? I'm not Ryan or Esposito, nor am I the facade you think, your boyfriend is, so do us both a favor, forget we ever worked together. I'm trying to rework the book since it's been since a hardship to you, so you won't have to worry about anything." Once again that damn emotionless voice, wait, rework the book? NO!

"Rick, I came here to apologize, not fight with you. I broke up with Demming, and you're correct he is a bag of air, and bullshit, so please I am sorry. Will you please consider coming back to the 12th? You know that's where you belong, your friends are there Rick" She pleaded almost tears in her eyes,

"Detective, check with your Captain, and you're wrong, I don't have friends at the 12th, they're yours and accepted me when I was forced on them. I don't need you or the precinct to buy friends with courtside tickets or a weekend with a fancy car, hell, I can get those all on my own.

"I was asked, by you, to help on a case where if I remember you arrested the wrong man and would have gone to trial with that case if I hadn't as you said, gone Castle and done my own thing so drop the pretense of friendship, shall we?

"I'm sorry it took you so long to see what everyone else did in a day Beckett, so expect some who will enjoy the relationship failing at the precinct, as for me, I feel bad for you. You're a great detective for other's but you sure suck at investigating your own business, think about that for your future relationships." His business-like tone, void of emotions were killing her as much as his words,

"Rick, Javi said you and Detective Pedersen were close, well words to that effect, what could she possibly offer you in just a few weeks that, I can't?"

Neither had heard the door open with Alexis and Karen returning, deciding to drop off the large number of purchases they both had made before going to lunch, they froze when they heard Kate Beckett's voice and questions.

"What can she offer me? Something you wouldn't understand Detective, she's honest, and she's real. I don't think you're capable of telling the truth when it comes to a matter concerning me to save your life. The big thing is I am wanted and appreciated there.

"Now if you want any more information, talk to Roy. He knows the entire story, thanks for stopping Detective and the apology, none was needed, but so you can feel better consider all is good. NOW, I do have an appointment" He turned and saw Karen and Alexis standing by the door,

"How long have you been standing there?" He asked quietly,

Karen crossed the distance to him and kissed him, "Long enough to hear the answers I wanted to hear." She said, shooting Beckett a look that any woman recognized as stay away from my man. Perhaps payback for her and Demming's stairwell performance of PDA.

Alexis picked up on it, and opened the door, and said politely, "I believe you were leaving Detective Beckett," as she held the door in the open position.

"Rick, think about what I said, please, that's all I ask." As she walked to the door which was closed the moment, she cleared the door cell by Alexis, and not gently.

"Hey, I'm sorry you both had to hear any of that, she just showed up, thought she owed me an apology, and obviously doesn't know the story by the requests she was making. Please don't be angry with me" his puppy dog eyes, looking at the two women,

"Rick, why would I be angry with you? It's obvious she knows she screwed up big time and is trying to get you back to the 12th or more, so that's on her, you certainly didn't encourage her from what I heard. Thank you, by the way, that was the nicest thing someone has said about me, I'm real and honest. I really liked that, but I don't think you scored any Beckett points with that answer." She laughed,

"Yeah Dad, I never heard you talk to Detective Beckett like that, I mean you weren't rude but you didn't back down or let her intimidate you in any way, I'm proud of you." She smiled,

"Hey, who's hungry, and how much damage did you two do to the stores?" Rick asked his mood back to the old Rick, as the girls went through each purchase with him

It might have been laughter coming from the Castle residence, Beckett took a cab home and replayed Rick's words over and over, in her head, I don't need you or the precinct to buy friends with courtside tickets or a weekend with a fancy car, hell, I can get those all on my own.

She was going to talk to Roy to find out what this was all about, but for now, she had to live with the fact she accomplished what she had set out to do, drive him away.

Chapter 10

12th Precinct

6:00 AM Next Day

Kate Beckett had given up on any attempt at sleep by 4:15 AM, gotten up, went for her run, the lights were still off at Castle's loft so she wasn't subjected to a replay of yesterday's run, showered and made it into the precinct before 5:50 AM. Roy wasn't due for another twenty minutes or so, and she was anxious to hear what he had to say about Castle.

Why did he lie? Hell, what was the need for any cover story at all, if Castle wanted to leave let him leave, it wasn't a big deal. Yeah, Kate, keep telling yourself that, if it wasn't a big deal why did you subject yourself to the humiliation you felt yesterday, wait, was that what Rick felt when she paraded Tom in front of him, oh God, she fucked things up royally.

She saw Roy's office light go on, but years of experience had taught her to allow him to have his first cup of coffee before she approached him. He walked out of his office, and as he approached her desk, had a look on his face,

"Something troubling you Detective? Why are you in so early? This wouldn't have anything to do with Castle, and your visit to his home yesterday would it?" Roy asked, and from the shocked look on her face knew that was exactly why his lead detective was there before the sun had completely appeared.

"Sir, how did you know about that? I mean yes sir I do need to speak to you about Castle, there are some questions I need answers to and he kept telling me to talk to you sir"

"He called me last night, I know all about your visit, let me get my coffee then we'll talk" as he continued on to the break room. He brewed two cups of coffee using that damn machine that Castle had purchased, she had yet to master anything about it but how to burn herself, and walked back past her desk. "Give me five minutes Beckett, then come to my office:

"Yes sir, five minutes it is" as she watched the clock tick away what seemed years until the time had mercifully passed,

She approached Roy's office with perhaps a sense of dread or worry, maybe it was fear, usually, it was just like a conversation with a friend, but things had changed. He was the recipient of a CA (Corrective Action) note, and her letter dampened their friendship and help reset, boss, employee relationship that she had completely ignored for the last few years.

"Sir, are you free to talk now? She asked poking her head into his doorway,

"Come in Beckett, close the door and sit down." Roy left the blinds open, which was protocol for a male superior when discussing issues with female subordinates.

"What's on your mind?" he asked as soon as she was seated,

"Sir, I think you know what I want to ask? You said Rick called you last evening, so you know I was at his loft, but did he tell you why I came?"

"Beckett, what Rick and I discussed is a matter that is between he and I," so what do YOU want to know.

"Sir, really you're going to play it this way when we both know what was discussed was me, and how I made a royal ass of myself in front of his daughter and new girlfriend? I thought we were better friends than that." She spat out, temporarily forgetting who she was speaking to.

"Well, Detective, when you ask me a question that requires me to breach the trust of someone else, don't get your shorts twisted when you get the answer I gave, I could have told you what you used to tell Rick, it's none of your business. Would that have made you feel any better?

"As for friendship, well we both know how much that cost us both concerning our careers. I relaxed and allowed you, because of friendship, to do things we are both now paying for. I can share with you the facts that Rick has approved since it's really his story to tell.

"Save yourself some grief Beckett, don't mention Detective Pedersen as his girlfriend until they make that announcement if they ever do. You know Rick is very protective of his family and those who are close to him, and you'll only wind up in even more trouble spreading that rumor." Roy said in a tone she had heard used on others, but never her.

"Sir, I saw her kiss him, right in front of me she was at his loft, before 6:00 AM, so if that's not his girlfriend, I don't know what is" Beckett was beginning to come unglued, the mental picture of the attractive lady with huge assets crossing the room and kissing him in front of her left her in a foul mood.

"Watch your attitude Detective, as for kissing, do you mean like the high school necking sessions you instigated with your boyfriend Tom Demming? Did you think I was so blind I didn't see, or even worse some of your fellow officers reported how awful you were treating Castle, since you two had hooked up, their term, not mine, with Detective Demming." Roy said coldly,

"Sir, that was, well sir, I apologize for that it was totally inappropriate for workplace behavior, but Sir, why is Castle at the 18th precinct? I mean we need him here, especially if Commissioner Boyle expects me to increase or maintain our closure rate, I can't do that Sir, and you know it." She whined,

"Why did Rick leave? Gee, maybe he heard Can I shoot him now, or you're not a cop Castle or the one that I thought broke his spirit, you can watch Castle as you took your boyfriend into an interrogation that Rick had been doing for well over a year.

"Even as good as those reasons would have been, it's not the reason why he left, I can share this with you. The Mayor heard about what was going on, thus the Commissioner heard about it, and then I heard about it, and we all felt the consequences of a Detective, a Lead Detective not simply doing her job.

"Boyle was getting a ton of pressure about the 18th not closing cases, and Detective Pedersen, yes the Karen Pedersen you saw at Rick's loft was about to leave because she couldn't get any help. She has as good if not better record as yours Kate, and Weldon couldn't afford to lose the only one who seems to close cases over there, surely not in an election year.

"His honor made the request to transfer Rick over there, and when we had the call, he agreed without a moment's hesitation. He had no idea who he would be working with, especially someone as lovely as Detective Pedersen." Roy said, not showing any emotions,

"Yeah, I believe that like I believe the world is flat", Beckett interrupted, realizing the moment the words were out of her mouth it was the wrong thing to say as she watched Roy's face turn from upset to livid.

"Are you calling or inferring that I am a liar Detective? It seems there's only one of us in this office that has been caught in that kind of behavior, you may want to clarify yourself, and be careful of the words you choose." His face showed the anger he fought hard to keep out of his voice.

"No Sir, I would never call or infer, it's just hard for me to believe that Castle would not know where he was going or what was in it for him? Especially to a new precinct with a terrible reputation. I can't understand why he would be in such a hurry to go, so much so that he didn't even stay to say goodbye." She said, trying but not succeeding in digging herself out of the huge hole she had just dug.

"You worked with Castle for almost two years, is that correct Beckett?" Roy asked with his lip quivering he was so angry,

"Yes sir, it was two years and two months to be exact, why is that important?" She asked,

"Well, Detective, in those two years and two months that you worked together, what did Castle get out of working here? A lot of grief, and mistreatment from someone he had paid $100,000 without battening an eye in hopes to capture her Mom's killer, opened his home to provide a living space when that detective's apartment got bombed and she had no place to live, other than a hotel, on and on I could go, so yeah, that sounds like someone always looking to see what he could gain from any situation.

"In that time, have you or any of your fellow officers been placed on short work weeks, or asked to ration critical supplies? Has Doctor Parrish had to go without new instruments that she needed to effectively do her job? Have we been able to keep business as usual in this house when all around you, fellow officers were faced with cutbacks, some cases layoffs, WHY do you think that is Detective?

"Where did the funding come from to allow me to take care of those that work for me, in a manner that would provide the best working conditions possible, even a few new cars for those that were death traps, where did the funds come from, the city? Even as juvenile as you are acting you know damn well where those funds came from, without one whisper of acknowledgment or thanks by the way.

"May I remind you the man is a millionaire, he doesn't need the middle of the night calls, or the long tedious days, he does so to help, and help he did, by your own admission, finally. When Commissioner Boyle asked if he would help, he had one condition, I bet you can't guess what that was, can you Detective?" Roy paused, as he opened his drawer and poured a healthy amount from his flask into his coffee cup.

"Sir, I don't know what condition Castle would place on the new work assignment, and I apologize if I upset you, I never meant to discredit your honesty or concern for all that work for you, sir. I never knew that Castle provided the funding for many of our programs, that other precincts had to cut back or eliminate sir, I guess I never thought"

"Good place to end that comment Detective, you never thought, yet several of your companions have thanked him in private, he was YOUR partner, but you never thought? LT sponsors the at-risk youth program and had an appreciation night to thank Rick for the new gym equipment, and boxing gear. It's keeping kids off the street and giving them something besides gang banging to do.

"Ann Hastings and Roz Karpowski got together with his daughter and staff at the Old Haunt to throw him a surprise birthday party two weeks ago, did you even know it was his birthday, you as his partner?"

"Sir, I did know it was his birthday, I sent him a text that morning wishing him a happy birthday, sir"

"Was that before or after Demming left your bed, never mind I don't want to know the answer to that question, back to the condition, you have no clue of what condition Rick would place on his new assignment?"

Kate was frustrated, this was not how she had planned this conversation to go, not in the least. "No sir, I have no idea."

This is a direct quote from the call with Rick, Boyle, and Mr. Mayor, "I'm not walking into another situation where everything I say will be mocked and put down. I am willing to help, but the detective there can't be another Beckett, I've had enough putdowns to last me a lifetime. If they want help, I will give it a try, but fair warning, no more of this or Bob I'm gone and gone for good along with my donations."

"Rick was assured that things were different, and in the short time there, he and Detective Pedersen have already closed a cold case, much due to the out of the box thinking of Rick. They seemed to click the moment they met, and the good news, well for me, that counts as one of my closures."

"So, Castle is still helping our closure rate from the 18th sir?" Kate asked hoping to salvage something good from the meeting,

"No Detective, I said my closure rate, your rate is being monitored and compiled by the Commissioner's staff, you're still behind target Detective.

"Sir? I don't understand if it counts as yours and is a homicide then shouldn't it count as ours as well?"

"Detective, I didn't set the rules, Boyle did, and I think you have really pissed him off this time, the short answer is no. If you didn't close it, it doesn't count for you or your team, for as long as you have one."

Kate's face flushed, "I see Sir, thank you"

"Oh, there's one more thing we need to discuss about you and your boyfriend Demming"

"Sir, he's not my boyfriend, we broke up," she muttered,

"Well, you can count your lucky stars of that, Demming has been placed on unpaid administrative leave, it seems he got into a beef with a shorter, possibly Hispanic man last night at Sweeney's Bar, he got the worst of the fight in the alley then lied to the officers that he was jumped. Several witnesses corroborated the story that he got a good old ass-kicking, so if the panel rules against him, he will be fired for cause and liable for his own medical bills.

"You may want to send him a sympathy card or thank Esposito who didn't like the fact he called you a name. I can't prove any of it, nor would I try, so in the future keep your personal matters out of my house, understood Detective?" He slammed his hand on the desk as his voice reached a crescendo.

"Yes Sir", was her only reply, it was news to her that Javi even knew of the text, of course, he did, Lanie, she thought and once again he defended her honor.

"Anything else Detective? Roy peered over his glasses,

"Just one Sir, why did we get the story that Rick had left the 12th until after his book was completed and his first tour had finished," She almost cried,

"It was the cover story, Boyle, Mr. Mayor, and Rick came up with, just in case things didn't work out at the 18th. When I sent Esposito over there to pick up a file, Rick had a change of heart and said he didn't care who knew where he was at, things had gone so well for him.

"Well of course when Esposito showed up, he about freaked, and I'm sure that by now half if not more of the precinct now knows where Rick is at. If we were trying to protect his privacy it's leaks like this that would kill any hope of any secret operations or locations.

"Once Esposito gets in and you have a word with him as his superior, bring him and yourself to my office, this bullshit gossip ring stops, and it stops today, or he'll be writing parking tickets." Roy was going down a list of things she was in trouble for.

"Yes Sir, just one more question, sir, if I may?"

Roy peered over his glasses still pissed off at her comment about honesty, "What would that be Detective?"

"Sir, Rick, eh, Castle told Javi he wasn't coming back to the 12th ever, never intended to, Sir, is that the same message he gave you?" Kate lowered her head,

"You know Detective, I'm surprised you had to ask that question, what does your keen investigating skills tell you?" He asked,

"That he's gone, and won't be back, that was the plan all along, why he thought he needed a cover story, so by that time everyone would have moved on with life without him helping, Sir, that's not what I really wanted, you have to believe me." She pleaded

"Oh, I believe you Detective, but it really doesn't matter what I believe, it's not me that needs convincing, and I mean more than with some feeble apology. In the meantime, prepare for some long hours you and your team, Boyle will be issuing closure rates weekly and will want to know what you're doing to catch up."

"Yes Sir, I'll talk to Esposito and then return sir, thank you, sir, may I be dismissed?"

Roy never looked up as he barked out, "Dismissed Detective"

The boys had come in and saw Kate in Roy's office, they could tell it wasn't a pleasant conversation for either, when Roy took out the flask and poured the liquid into his coffee, they both knew something had pissed him off.

Kate stepped out of Roy's office headed straight to the lady's room, she needed cold water splashed on her face, she couldn't believe this was happening. Her actions had put her in the crosshairs of the Commissioner, Javi had beat the hell out of Tom, who was probably going to get fired, Rick had a gorgeous detective spending the night with him and closing cases that counted for Roy, but not her team. Things couldn't get more fucked up, or so she thought.

The boys approached her, "Hey Kate what was that all about, the Captain looks pissed,"

"He is, very pissed. Javi, I need to talk to you in private, conference room B now". She got out.

They entered the conference room and Kate said, "Hold out your hands, now"

Javi reluctantly held his hands out, there weren't any cuts, that's why he wrapped his knuckles, but the bruising of the ra ta tat on Demming's face caused bruises to start to form.

"Was it worth it Javi? Did you almost have to kill him to get revenge?"

"Kate, he took the first swing, I just finished what he started, and I only hit him once, well once for each letter of the name he called me. Does the Captain know it was me? How much trouble am I in?" he asked sheepishly

"The answer to your questions is yes he knows, how much trouble we're about to find out, come on." As she headed to Roy's office

"Sir, may we see you?" She asked,

"Detective Beckett, you're dismissed, Detective Esposito come in and close the door,"

"Yes Sir" Kate could only watch as the door was closed and the blinds were drawn, Espo emerged thirty-five minutes later, looking shook, and headed to his desk. Kate waited to see if he was there to clean it out, or what,

"So, what's going on Javi," she finally asked,

"It's taken care of, but if I spread one more rumor, I think I will be following Demming out the door, I have never seen the Captain so pissed. He was ready to suspend me when he changed his mind and told me to get my ass out here and get caught up on the closure rate while you still had your team. Are things that bad for us, Kate?"

"No Javi, they're worse"

Chapter 11

18th Precinct

ONE MONTH LATER

Karen was excited, Memorial Day was coming up, and for the first time in as long as she could remember, she was going to be off of work, in fact, she was going to be in the Hamptons with her boyfriend. They had made that official, well the status of formally dating no one else the previous evening. It was the fourth official date, as Rick called them, he dressed up, picked her up, and took her out for the evening, mostly to places she had no idea of where beforehand. She smiled to herself as she paused to remember the night before;

Last night it was dinner and dancing at the hotspot of the clubs in New York, and it wasn't lost on her that he received as many if not more stares from women of all ages, with or without men by their sides, as she did from the male counterparts. He was a gorgeous, sexy, and kind man that was very patient with her. She had almost slipped and taken the next step last night when they returned to her condo, but Rick stopped her. She smiled to herself as she remembered the words, he was so sweet,

"Not that I don't want to, or that I'll kick myself for months for doing this, but Karen, you've had a few drinks, I don't want our first time to be lost in some fog of alcohol or anything but a love haze. I know what I want, but sweetheart, when you're ready, I want you to remember it, all of it, you're that special to me."

As he gently kissed her and carried her to her bedroom. He placed her gently on her bed, kissed her goodbye and whispered, "See you in the morning, we have some miles to run," and let himself out of her home. They had exchanged keys the week before, so all that remained was for her to get off her virtuous ass and make love to her man, who showed every day how much he cared.

He was right on time this morning, as usual, with her coffee and chocolate glazed doughnut she could only eat IF they met their ever-increasing goal in running each day. She used to hate this time of day, forcing herself only because she had seen so many friends pack on the pounds and it seemed when they started, it was as if the dam burst, size two one day, size 14, and counting the next time she had seen them.

Now, with Rick, she couldn't wait for it each day. They ran together, talked, and he did shower in the guest bathroom every day, they went to the precinct, somedays Rick had to meet with his publisher, but most days he stayed with her the entire day. They spent the evenings either at the loft or her condo and literally enjoyed music, TV, whatever came up.

They had settled into homebody's just enjoying being together, walking in the park, or even her reading his rough notes and critiquing police scenes in his book. She knew that no one was allowed this far into his personal life, she knew things about the Nikki Heat character that no one else did, in fact in some ways she helped shape her.

Rick had painted Nikki as he saw Beckett in real life, selfish, spoiled, and entitled, but she convinced him to soften the description so the character would appeal to more women, his largest fan base. She had met Gina once, and she even seemed to like her, since Rick told her about her suggestions, all of which Gina agreed was correct.

She was amazed, that for such a rich man, he was also so neat. She went in to clean up behind him one morning, and the towels were in the washer, the shower stall had been wiped clean and he even cleaned the glass enclosure. The sinks were spotless, not even one hair from where he shaved, every morning the bathroom was spotless before he emerged dressed to head to the precinct.

She heard the rumors, she was sleeping with him, after his money, hell, they had been talking about her for years and she put it all out of her mind. The only area she vowed off-limits was Rick, Alexis, or Martha, no one said a word about any of his family as one detective found out the hard way. One phone call to Roy and he was transferred to the piers, working nights. The message was sent and received and if they talked, they kept it on the down-low.

Rick had heard the rumors about Karen and invited a few of the louder voices to a sparring session with the writer without Karen's knowledge. Hell, this would be easy picking for the macho cops who viewed him as a cop want to be, just a hack writer that he had to write about it because there was no way he could ever do it. It only took two sessions and one detective on sick leave from injuries sustained for the mass to understand, there was more to the man than they had judged. If they had an opinion it was kept to themselves or spoken so low Karen or Rick never heard about it.

Rick had taken on the second case that Karen had on her Must Close list, a murder of a high school student in the park. Everyone believed it was a drug deal gone wrong but Karen. Something deep inside her knew the schoolmates knew more than they were saying but because of their status, fathers, and mothers holding prominent positions this case was getting the whitewash.

Over the last few weeks, they had narrowed it down to four of his classmates, and when one of them posted a video on social media, it was Alexis who pointed it out to Karen.

"Karen, didn't you say you and Dad were working on the case of a student from Washington Preparatory High School? Alexis had asked and then showed the posted video.

"Yes Sweetie, why do you ask?" Karen replied,

"Well this may be nothing more than a prank, but I thought you and Dad should see it," as she played the video,

Rick had used his influence to secure a search warrant from Judge Markaway and when they searched a storage locker, they found the murder weapon, a video camera, and a box of videos where the kids had been acting out getting shot, all of it a fake except for the last tape.

They pulled the kids back into the station, all had parents present, and all but one, the ring leader and smart-ass Duane Solvay had lawyers. When the tapes were played, Ramona the youngest girl caved and gave a full confession implicating Duane.

Soon other the others followed, and perhaps in the most incriminating move he could have made, Duane cussed his friends out for being weak and if they had kept their mouths shut, they would have all gotten away with it, all in front of cameras recording.

The case was closed with a plea deal for manslaughter when Duane confessed, it was all in an attempt to impress the girlfriend. Since he was already 18, he was sentenced to ten years, a slap on the wrist for what he did, but the case was now closed.

Roy sent another text congratulating them, "Well, congrats again, two cold cases closed, have to tell you this is keeping Boyle and Mr. Mayor happy, well less pissed that the 12th is behind the 18th in closures for the first time in three years, Congrats. Enjoy the long weekend, talk to you when you get back.

Karen searched Rick's eyes for any emotion with the news and found none. He was quiet for a few minutes, and then said,

"Hey, why don't we head up to the Hamptons tomorrow, I'm sure Roy will give you the time off, and we could have a few days to ourselves if you would like?" He smiled,

"I would like that, very much. So much in fact I already asked and received the time off as she showed Rick the official approval of her vacation day request, as she spun her computer screen to his side,

"I wish I could kiss you right now, I mean, that's the best surprise, Alexis and her friends will be up Friday, so we'll have two days to ourselves. I want to show you the best places around the entire place, and really, I'd like some time just me and you." He winked, and gave her the smile,

"I know, Rick, God I know but hey we only have a few hours then we can leave OK?" she said, smiling at him

XxX

12th Precinct

Same Time Frame

"Kate, what the hell do you mean we're working this weekend, who made this decision? Some of us have plans" Javier exploded

"The word is HAD plans Esposito, and who made the decision, Commissioner Boyle gave us the mandate to close three cases before we could consider taking three days off. Do you realize this is the first time in three years the 18th Precinct is kicking our ass in closure rate? If he hadn't issued the order I would have, we're not getting beat by," then she stopped

"Go ahead and say it, Kate, we're not getting beat by Castle and your replacement, Detective Pedersen" Ryan chimed in,

"She's not my replacement Kevin, and that has nothing to do with it. We've slipped in our closure rates and Boyle wants to know what we're doing to get it back up; my only response is we're working overtime to close these cases." Kate replied,

"Why not just ask him to send Castle back? That's what's kicking our ass, Kate, staring at that God Damn board for another three days isn't going to solve these, what we need are different ideas, different scenarios, the crazy shit that Castle used to throw out" Ryan was pissed, he and Jenny had plans and now he would be working because Kate needed to beat the other woman in something.

Captain Montgomery happened to be walking by and heard the loud voices,

"Detective Beckett, who authorized the overtime for your team to work this weekend?" He asked giving her the look

"Sir, no one authorized it, the team and I were going to come in on our own to increase our closure rates sir" Kate responded,

"So, this is a volunteer effort would that be correct Detective?" He was staring at her now,

"Sir, yes sir, since the team won't be billing hours, this would be a volunteer effort, sir." She was looking at the floor knowing now the boys had just heard the truth, she had no authority to force them to give up their plans because she had fallen behind Rick's new muse, girlfriend, partner, or whatever the hell she was

"Ryan, Esposito, I take it you didn't realize this was a volunteer effort and have plans for this weekend you would rather keep, is that true" Montgomery gave them don't even try to lie to me look.

"That's correct Sir, we have plans and want to keep them" Ryan answered,

"As do I sir" Esposito added,

"Well Detective Beckett, I can't stop you from working any overtime you want for free, BUT you can't force your team to join you, Ryan, Esposito, you're not to set foot in this precinct until your starting shift on Tuesday is that clear?" Roy barked out,

"Sir, yes Sir" they walked out for lunch to avoid talking to their lead detective, who they both were really pissed off at. It was always better to walk away and come back then talk when they had cooled down,

"Guys, you going to lunch, hold on, I'll join you" Kate called but her boys took the stairs rather than wait for her to catch up, they were pissed and she didn't blame them now. Well, there was always work for her, hell who needed them, she'd solve the cases herself.

"Beckett, you're lucky I don't suspend you, if one of your team complains it might still happen, now go make things right, before you lose more than your God Damn pride." He was pissed and everyone in the station, not only her floor but the entire precinct knew it.

She got to the street just a few minutes after they left, but couldn't find a trace of the boys, great she thought, someone else pissed off at me. She turned and started back up the stairs, depressed, why the hell was her world falling apart.

Well, Royce used to say, "when you hit a wall kid, walk away, come back a day later, either the wall is still there, or you've figured out a way over, under, or around it. Don't stop living kid, not for the job, not for anything" Maybe her old TO's voice in her head was a signal, there wasn't a lot she was going to get done by herself, so she decided to take a ride over the weekend. Her Dad's cabin was a few hours' drive away, hell she hadn't ridden her Harley in forever and she needed to get it out and blow out the engine.

As soon as she apologized to the boys and the Captain she would take some time off, and for the first time, she could remember she was leaving a case and really didn't care. IT was her time, as Royce used to say, "take some You time kid, you'll know when you need it,"

Well, she needed to step away, for her sanity and before she completely lost the respect of everyone, she worked with trying to manipulate them into her line of thinking. She approached the guys, and got the cold shoulder she expected, at least they listened, and she was sincere in her words. The shock to them was when she approached the Captain and requested a week off, she explained she recalled the TO telling her to step away before the job ate her alive, and that was what she was doing.

She was shocked but Roy said to her, "I'm glad something Royce said to you stuck, he was right, now get out of here and get your head straight, I know things will get better when you get back."

She didn't share her plans with anyone but spent the next day completely tuning her Harley, thankful for a Grandpa that made her do it, and learn the right way, now she could tear the engine apart and rebuild it if she needed to.

After the normal maintenance she decided to take it down to the auto parts store, she had a feeling she was missing something. When she came out after buying the replacement parts that she had used to tune her bike, she turned the key to hear clicking. A few minutes later it was confirmed her battery was dead and now that it was replaced, she could leave without fear of breaking down.

Finally, she was set, deciding to leave early the next morning she drove the bike to her parking garage and blocked it in with her police cruiser, God help anyone who thought they were going to steal her baby, that wasn't happening.

This was one Memorial Day weekend she was going to enjoy Fuck Boyle, Castle, and especially that pig Demming, she was glad that Javi messed him up. Maybe next time he would think before calling a woman a bitch, she could have taken care of him herself, but it was nice that at least somebody took up her honor.

XxX

Next Morning

Executive Air Strip 6:00 AM

Rick had shocked Karen this morning, he had her pack up last night, and instead of heading out for their run, they were headed to the private airstrip that most executives used in lieu of JFK to avoid the hassles if they could afford it. They weren't driving to the Hamptons, they were taking a helicopter to get there in 40 minutes or less, time for a late morning run on the beach

Karen thought what a sweet man, he was always thinking of ways to make her life better, he knew she hated sitting in traffic almost as much as going to the dentist. True to his word, they were greeted by his car service and were pulling into what she first thought was another street until she saw the huge double gates, with R on one gate, and C on the other, then she saw the house come into view, and it suddenly hit her, her man was rich, not wealthy rich.

"Oh my God Rick, you said beach house, you never said mansion, my God, you really are a celebrity. You're so out of my league, I don't know what the heck you see in me, but please don't stop."

He took her hands in his, "Stop, I'm not a celebrity, I'm the same man that walked into your station and was almost speechless the first time I saw the beautiful detective I was lucky enough to work with, turned out you were as smart as you are beautiful. This, everything you see, it's just being blessed, it could be gone tomorrow, and I wouldn't care" he said looking into his eyes,

She realized for the first time, just how humble the man was, he gave credit to everyone but his own hard work for his success,

She locked on his eyes," Rick, I'm sorry, it's just you aren't seeing this from a person who works her ass off just to put enough away to hope to retire someday, and hopes she did enough. I know you downplay it but you've worked your ass off to provide this to Alexis and for your family to enjoy. God, I knew you were humble, but," a tear rolled down her cheek,

Rick pulled her into his arms, "Karen, I won't deny that I have more money than any man should have, but it makes no difference, it never did, not until I walked into the 18th and saw you. You make me happy, being with you, working with you, laughing, and well, of course dating you.

"I could lose this all tomorrow, and I would only be back where I started from. Growing up, wondering if we would be moving this month or the next to beat the landlord out of the rent. Days were hard, but you know I made it through, and it made me appreciate everything I've been given. The only thing I don't want is for this to come between us, please I'm still the same guy you met almost three months ago, I promise."

She leaned back and kissed him, "You big lug, it's not you that has to prove his worth to me, I'm just trying to figure out with all of this, why me, why do you care so much, work so hard to make me happy, every day. I'm nothing special, I'm just"

His lips crushed hers, as he held her for the longest time, until he whispered in her ear, "You're special to me, Karen, you just don't know how special yet."

Chapter 12

In Route to Upstate New York

Thursday 6:00 AM

It was another sleepless night for Beckett, tossing and turning until she gave up and decided to start her trip early. She tried to never ride at night, or even dark, it seemed the motorists had lost all consideration for anyone riding a motorcycle. One had even yelled out to her as they zoomed by "do something productive with your life stop being a whore to a bunch of losers."

She wasn't sure where that had come from, she had been riding alone, and never did anything to provoke the outburst and certainly, she didn't have the type of body to make it so obvious she was a woman unless he had spotted her long hair slipping from under her helmet.

This trip would take her to a small town named Woodbourne, located in the Catskill Mountains, her Dad had purchased the land when he was still single and built the cabin himself, well the original building before he and her mother were married. Once married life took over, Johanna added her taste, and the cabin was expanded to include a total of three bedrooms, and running water, and inside plumbing as well as a modern kitchen. Her dad mostly came during Christmas now, she hadn't been back since the first year after her mom was killed, so it was time, time to make peace, or perhaps find it.

The trip was just over one hundred miles, and after she left the freeway the back roads would reduce her speed to make the trip last about 2 ½ hours to 3 hours, a good ride, for her and the bike. The sun was just beginning to rise as she pulled out of her parking garage, in search of some peace.

She traveled in peace once she reached the road US 42, it would take her most of the way, well using backroads her Dad had taught her, he hated freeways as well. She stopped about an hour into her trip, checked the bike since it had been a long time since she had opened it up as she did on the expressway.

Convinced the bike was still in good shape she went inside and purchased a large coffee and bear claw to hold her over, she would have to go into the small town to stock up provisions once she arrived but this would hold her over till then.

She thought as she rode, about her life, first as a teenager, then the day her world changed forever, her time with Royce, some of the stupid feelings she had for him. He was showing her how to be a good cop, she took it for love and felt like a fool when he said he was married and there would always only be one woman for him, even though she was dying of cancer at the time.

Shortly after her death, he retired and she started out on her own, convinced that she was going to be the one smart enough to solve her Mom's case. It had earned her a suspension and mandatory counseling with the department shrink before she was allowed to come back to work. Burying those emotions, she took any and every risky assignment that came up, perhaps that was the reason Montgomery chose her over more veteran cops to fill the spot as a homicide detective.

Whatever his reason she was determined to prove his decision to be the right one and quickly rose up the ranks, solving some of the more difficult murders, only because she didn't stop, no matter how tired, hungry, or sleepy she got, she worked the case till the end.

Why did she hook up with Sorensen, hell maybe she was just lonely and figured another cop wouldn't be demanding of her job? Things worked out well, at first, he never was the best in the bedroom but it was better than taking her chances on the pickups from the bars. He cared for her, but she knew he never loved her, hell she never loved him if she were honest. Then came the day he assumed she would fall in line like his good little lady, he got the surprise of his life and went to Boston alone.

Since he left, she had dated a few times, a few pickups, nights out with Lanie, but mostly it was the precinct that kept her sane, working ridiculous hours, she needed time away. Now that she was enjoying the wind blowing against her face shield and hearing the sounds of nature, she did need to getaway. Pulling up the gravel drive to the cabin she paused to take it in, it hadn't changed, she could still close her eyes and see her Mom with her gardening tools, setting out her beloved rose bushes.

She opened the cabin and it was almost like a trip back in time, her Dad hadn't changed a thing from the last time her Mom was there. She walked down the hall, their bedroom still had the quilt she had made the winter before she left for California, apparently, her dad had taken a guest room so as not to disturb the memories.

She walked into the room, and for the first time in a very long time, felt like the little girl whose Mom had held and wiped away her tears when she had her first heartbreak, her tears fell as she whispered to her Mom a silent prayer for help. If anyone could get her back on track, Johanna Beckett or her memory would be what did.

XxX

Castle's Hampton Beach House

Wednesday 7:30 AM

Rick and Karen were greeted with a catered breakfast, including her coffee just the way she liked it, no SPLENDA, she laughed as she walked by the cupboards and saw a big black X marked through the box that held the sweetener she loathed.

"Rick, who takes their coffee with this stuff?" she asked with her nose wrinkled up in disgust.

"Every once in a while, Mother goes on her diet for a week or so, that box has been up there for almost two years" he laughed,

"Who put the X through it, was that to make sure it wasn't in my coffee? You are just too thoughtful," she leaned in and kissed his cheek.,

'Is he taking credit for something I did again, Miss. Karen? I'm Hilda, I'm the housekeeper, cook and anything else this man can think of for me to do," she laughed as she crossed the room and hugged Rick,

"It's been a while, Rick, how are you? You look great, and you look happy, for the first time in a long time. I know, I know just do my job, but hell if you haven't fired me yet after 13 years why do you think I would believe you would do it now." She laughed, as Rick pulled her into a big hug.

"Good to see you, are you still making Paul's life a living hell? How are the kids, still well?" he asked in sincerity,

She kissed his cheek, "Everyone's great Rick, no cancer they got it in time, thanks to you for paying the hospital bill, Paul will be stuck with me until he finds something else to take him out. He and the girls send their love, they miss you and Miss Alexis." Hilda said,

"Well tell them Alexis will be here after Friday night, they are welcome to stop by, I would love to see Paul as well, why don't you join us for a cookout, oh I'm sorry as he turned to Karen, "Sweetheart do you mind if we have some friends over Saturday, I usually throw a small party and do some grilling?"

"Why are you asking me, Rick, I'm here to do whatever, of course, I'd love to meet your friends," she was shocked that he took the time to ensure she was in agreement, even at his own mansion, that man.

Hilda hugged her, "He's a good man, sometimes people take advantage of him, and that makes me and the girls mad, but you made him happy. Miss Alexis told me about you when she called to get the house opened, I asked if I should prepare the guest room for you, she told me, yes, but don't count on it being used much unless Dad screws up" they both laughed, Karen blushed a bit,

"Well, we'll see, I mean he's been so very patient with me, I mean always the gentleman," Karen smiled,

"He better be, or I'll beat his butt," she laughed, then she got serious. "My husband was diagnosed with cancer three years ago, and well we didn't have the means, Rick, he found out, next thing I know the whole family is being picked up and flown to M. D. Anderson Cancer Hospital.

"Rick paid for a rental home one block from the hospital and all our expenses, including Paul's hospital bill, this is the second year he's got the all-clear from the doctors. Tears came to her eyes, he didn't have to do that, but my girls, well they're Daddy's girls so naturally don't say anything bad about Rick in front of them, or you will have a fight on your hands. Anita and Erin think the sun rises and set's in him, well, I'm not too far behind them but I have to keep his ego in check." She smiled,

"I could tell behind all the bluster, you loved him, he's hard not too, really" Karen smiled, and then Rick rejoined them from putting the luggage in the house.

"I know you've been talking about me Hilda, don't believe half of what she says, Karen", he laughed as Hilda went after him mockingly with a broom,

"Well, we'll see about the cookout Rick, but I'll definitely see you before you head back, Karen I can't tell you how good it is to meet you, take care of him please." She smiled, gathered her supplies, and off to clean the kitchen, and then she was gone.

"Well, I know it's a little out of order but would you like to go for a run, I usually run in the small waves, it keeps me cooler and adds a little resistance to help build the calf muscles, Rick asked

"Sure, but can you answer one question Rick?" she asked, locking on his eyes,

"Sure, what is it?" he asked, just happy to be alone with her,

"Where did you put my bag, if I'm correct, I'm guessing the guest room, right?" she blushed slightly,

"Yes, do you want me to put it someplace else? There are 5 different guest rooms to choose from, I just thought"

"Would you put it in your room, please? I mean if it's OK with you?" she smiled through her blush, as a smile so big she thought it would break his face appeared on Rick.

"Be right down with it, then we can change for the run?" he asked,

"Yes, then we'll need to shower so we can deal with that when we get our calories burned. I'm still holding you to that pact about the chocolate glazed doughnuts," Rick pulled out a box from behind him and there was her doughnut, even away from the city, the man still thought of her every craving.

"How? When never mind, I'm just going to enjoy this and not worry how you do so much to make me happy," she kissed him as he pulled away to retrieve her bag.

"Be right back," he raised his eyebrows, at her and made her blush even more,

"You can change in there if you're more comfortable Karen," Rick said as he pointed to the attached bathroom and huge hot tub.

"I think here is good, unless you don't want to see me naked," she laughed,

Her answer came quickly and the run was postponed as they found a new way to burn off some calories,

She was shy, he was patient, and when he held her close naked skin touching naked skin, she couldn't believe how many ways he had to make her feel the feelings that she had missed for so long, hell forever. Her ex-husband never paid the attention to her body as Rick did, almost like he was worshiping each part.

She reached her climax long before he was even near entering her love area, he made her lie still, and let him make love to her. God, where was she, the lights, stars, oh my God, and then he entered her and a new round of fireworks began.

She couldn't believe that they had gone three rounds, and she lay spent in his arms, her head on his chest listening to the steady beat of his big heart. She had never felt the feelings he had made her feel, and it was well worth the wait. She was glad he stopped her that night, she would remember this day for as long as she remembered.

"Sweetie, are you OK? He asked softly, I didn't hurt you, did I? I wanted this to be special for us"

She raised her head, kissed his lips, "You didn't hurt me at all, you took me to places I had never been, God Rick, three times? Or did I lose count,"

"You didn't lose anything sweetheart and this was special for me, I know I have a reputation, and yes when I was younger, I earned some of it, but since Alexis came along, well, let's just say the fiction was far better than the real story." He locked onto her eyes and his blue orbits were almost enough to send her into orbit again, so that was the look of love she thought.

She smiled up at him, "I'm glad, not that it would have made a difference Rick, your past was just that your past and none of my business, but I wanted you to know why I was putting this off, for so long. God, I should have slept with you months ago. Is this how it's going to be every time love?" She asked.

"I don't know, but I sure hope so, I wanted you to feel what and how I feel about you, not just one part of your body, but God that body is enough to send me to the cold showers just thinking about them. Let's say the anticipation was well worth the wait, your body is even more beautiful than I could have imagined, which I have on several occasions" he smiled and kissed her again.

They spent their first morning and early afternoon where Karen had hoped, in his bed and she hadn't been disappointed. God, that man knew how to make her go over the edge. They finally showered and resisted the urge, for a try at shower sex, as they dressed and walked along the beach, holding hands. Rick didn't let go, even when Karen stopped to collect seashells, but brought her closer to him as they wrapped arms around each other's waists.

After the walk, Rick took her into the Hamptons proper for lunch and for her to pick up some hair supplies she had forgotten to pack. Once again, one or the other found the opposite's hand and became one as they strolled leisurely down the street. They talked about the shops, the quaintness of the buildings, even how Karen had first wanted to be an architect, but settled on Criminology at the University of North Carolina to be closer to, and have more classes with her boyfriend.

Once the divorce was final, she went to the Academy in New York because there was such a shortage of police officers, the bonus package they offered would pay for the relocation and she needed a fresh start away from the ex, away from all things that seemed familiar to her. She stayed with her cousin sharing expenses until she became engaged and then moved to her own condominium, using her savings to buy, rather than rent a place to live.

She had concentrated on her job and made Detective only 8 months after Beckett did. She chose homicide to work in because she knew how it felt to lose something, or someone, even not through death, her empathy was apparent to the victim's families and she quickly gained a following of CI's (Confidential Informants) allowing her to increase closure rates for her precinct.

She admitted being on a few dates, but most guys didn't understand the job of a cop, or only wanted to jump into bed the moment they had finished a cup of coffee since they considered her divorced, and needy for sex. How wrong they were, that was the last thing she wanted in a relationship, her experience with her husband wondering why everyone was so into sex, didn't do anything for her.

That changed this morning, now she truly understood the art of making love, rather than being the recipient of a slam-bam, not even a thank you man sexual act. Rick made sure, she was satisfied, completely and in every way, before he even began to gain his gratification. Just thinking about it made her want him, in the middle of the afternoon, sitting in a freaking ice cream shop, she actually had love aches to be with him.

"Penny for your thoughts unless they are X-Rated and about me, then you can have whatever you want" Rick kissed her gently on the neck,

"You're serious about that?" she asked. Playing a little coy with him,

"Yes, whatever, you desire,"

"Take me home, I want to make love to you all afternoon and night,"

He didn't have to be told twice; they were at the Hamptons where they spent the next several hours making up for the lost time.

Chapter 13

Beckett Cabin, Upstate New York

Woodbourne NY

Next Morning

Kate had spent the remainder of the day yesterday, going through old memories, reliving her youth, and enjoying some great memories. Before she knew it, daylight had turned to dusk, she had found some of the staples her Dad always kept stashed away, plus the fruit from just past her yard provided a good source of food, especially when she really didn't want to try to make the 4-mile trip to town on her bike at dark.

She cried when she saw her Mom's Richard Castle novels all lined up, some still had sticky notes on pages where her mom would make advance guesses of who did what, and some notes about what to tell Katie, the next time she called. She had tried to get her to read the books with her, to no avail, now that she was gone, they meant more than their weight in gold to her.

She rose from a better night of sleep than she'd had in a long time, and decided to shower and head to town to stock up on some of the canned goods, she'd planned on being there for at least four or five days, depending on the weather reports for her return trip home.

She was just about to grab her phone, keys, and gun when she heard it, it was close, not next door but close. The sound that only one machine ever manufactured could ever emit, a Harley Davidson Motorcycle, but who the hell? The couple who owned that cabin were at least the same age as her Dad, him buying a Harley, not likely.

She walked out the door, dressed in her riding gear, including leather pants, chaps, boots, jacket, and sunglasses, and started her own magical machine. She revved the engine, and waited, she heard the engine rev up a little longer and louder in reply to hers, this was repeated a few times until there was nothing. She thought oh well, it must have been someone camping when a shiny black Harley Road Glide Special came up her driveway,

Her hand was close to her weapon, out as far as the cabin was, she never knew what or who any stranger was, or their business.

"Forgive me, mam, I heard the sound of your bike, and I had to try to find who the owner of such a sweet machine was, oh, forgive me, please, I'm Jerry Leor, my parents have owned the cabin two down from here for years, but I've been out of New York for quite a while, I just moved back." He said as he took off his helmet revealing a nice-looking man in his mid to late thirties, as he extended his hand.

"Your parents are Leor's? They have been friends with my parents, well they were very close until my Mom passed away and they sort of drifted apart. We spent a lot of time up here when I was younger, and I never heard anything about a son" Kate interrogated him,

"Yeah, things were rough between us for quite a while, I lived in San Diego, until just recently and I guess getting older makes you rethink a lot of values that came between you when you were 17 years old and knew everything he smiled. I was discharged from the US Marines last month after 20 years, a job choice Dad didn't agree with and Mom, only barely tolerated. Dad signed for me to get in, even when he would rather, I had gone to college like,"

"Like Brenda, you sister, the doctor?" she smiled, "If you heard what we used to hear, no wonder you joined the Marines to get away from that, I think I would have some nights, she laughed."

"You definitely know my parents", he laughed, "yeah Brenda was the apple of their eye for years and I was just the screwup brother that joined the jarheads to go kill people, it was tough to take when I came home, so I started coming home less and less and finally, just didn't bother to at all. As you said, there's only so much anyone can take of Saint Brenda and her heroic efforts of saving people" he tried to smile but Kate could tell the hurt was deep,

"I haven't seen your parents in over 10 years, I stopped coming after Mom died, Dad mainly just comes during Christmas to be alone and to think about the good old days. How are they getting along?" Kate asked,

"Well, not good, that's one reason I came back, Mom is really having a hard time, and Dad doesn't say anything just sits in his chair and stares at pictures of Brenda" He looked away,

"I'm sorry, did something happen to your sister, not being nosey but your Dad was always the life of the party as I recall, it's been a while as I said" Kate offered, trying not to intrude

"I guess you wouldn't have heard, they lived in Queens and didn't go anywhere but here or to Brenda's home in Philadelphia, Brenda was killed by her estranged husband after coming home from a shift at the hospital," he said, looking out to the trees,

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, and I'm sorry about what I said earlier," she felt like she had put her foot in it again, insulting the man's sister who had been murdered.

"No, no, there was no way you knew, you know I still didn't get your name I know my parents used to talk about the Shaw's, who live next door, and the Beckett's two doors down, so I'm guessing you would have been a Beckett then." He said a bit shyly,

"Yes, I was, in fact still am, Kate Beckett, good to meet you, Jerry, again, I'm sorry about your sister. I know what's it like, my mom didn't die, she was murdered as well, so it's been some rough times for Dad and me as well. The only thing you can do is be there, grieving is a very personal thing.

"I know Dad and I couldn't understand how each of us processed the grief, and it cost us a few years, well I would like to get back. As you said, things don't seem as important with a few years of age or experience under your belt, you're more willing to let go of things that once seemed so important when they were so trivial."

"Well, Kate Beckett, I was getting ready to ride into town, seems like Mom and Dad haven't been here in forever and anything they left had to be destroyed unless you like WW 2 Rations he laughed, I hope I didn't disturb you or delay you too long."

"Not at all, in fact, I was just headed to town to replenish the cupboards as well, if you would like a riding companion," she asked, and was immediately answered by such a nice smile,

"That would be great, I'm still getting my bearings out here, I only got back to New York two days ago, and well, I had to get away." He said as he put his helmet back on,

"Trust me, I know the feeling" as she led the way out of the drive and down the road to the small town, at least she had someone to talk to, well for a while, old friends of the family. There was a lot of baggage and pain there, so maybe Jerry needed a friend as well, let it happen, Kate, she thought as she rode, stealing peeks over at him and his classy bike,

XxX

Hamptons House

Later Same Evening

Karen was still getting used to Rick's tender slow hands, he made her feel like no one had ever made her feel. She was quickly becoming addicted to his touch, when he combined it with kisses placed strategically on her body she actually quivered with excitement, he was so tender, so gentle.

When they had gotten through the door and out of sight of the driver who was pulling away it was all hands on deck, she was pulling his clothes off as fast as she could, he was the drug and she was addicted. Their sessions christened, the pool area, the hot tub, the shower, twice, and finally their bed, yes, she had said their bed. She had a taste of what it was like, and she wasn't leaving.

They were lying together in what she had started to call their position, her head on his chest, his arm around her, gently stroking any part of her body he could reach, when he got to the nipples, it started another session, my God, what did this man take, how could he perform so many times, in such a short period of time. She was just enjoying lying with him when he asked,

"OK, that breath was different, why don't you ask me, sweetheart, I'm an open book." He whispered in her ear, kissing her neck,

"I was just thinking about what supplement you have to take to be, well, eh as"

"You mean how can we make love so many times, well, it's been a very long time for me, so I guess I had a lot of pent up desire for you, plus show me, one man who wouldn't get turned on by the mere sight of your body, you really have no idea of just how hot you are, do you." He smiled as he kissed her, but I think I'm going to need a longer break, well for that, but I have my ways to make you happy" he smiled,

"Oh my God, if you only knew, you sure do, remember when we were eating ice cream in that little parlor, I looked at you licking you spoon and I got so damn turned on, I almost had an orgasm in the middle of a freaking ice cream store, me, I never even had one during sex before you" she pulled him to her and poured every ounce of love she was feeling into her kiss, a gentle I love you kiss, different than I want to jump your body kiss.

She laid with him, kissing, brushing the hair out of his eyes, just talking about any and everything, and since she opened pandora's box about, her first orgasm, she was open to any question he asked.

"Yes, I was a virgin on my wedding night, and after a week with that idiot, it's no wonder why I thought what's the big deal about sex, it didn't do anything for me except hurt most of the time, God did you change my mind." She smiled and kissed his cheeks, you make me want you just by looking at you, am I sex fanatic for that?" She asked half-serious,

Rick chuckled, "No sweetie, it's like the first time you tasted something and you thought wow this is good, well you finally got a taste of what it's supposed to feel like for a woman when her man worships her body. That doesn't make you a fanatic, just a woman who knows when she is pleased." He kissed her gently, and held her tightly,

"You know you can ask? I know you're probably wondering, and I'll tell you this a lot less than you are imagining," she giggled, in his side,

"Rick, somethings should stay private, sweetie, I don't care about how many or who was before me, just as long as it's me and me alone now," She raised up on one elbow, her eyes, locked on his, and then she got the answer with his lips pressed to hers,

"That's why I wanted to wait until it was perfect for you, I don't ever want you to look anywhere else but here, in my eyes, my heart, and my soul, OK?" as he kissed the tears that had fallen silently down her cheek as she hugged him so tightly, for once, she knew what happiness truly felt like, the words sweet surrender would never mean the same to her again.

She felt the change come immediately, and perhaps it was jealousy, perhaps curiosity, but she had to know, she felt that she was part of him, and just had to know.

"Rick, you said I could ask anything right?" she looked shy again,

"Yes, anything, so ask what is bothering you now" as he held her tightly,

"I know you were married twice and neither of those women concerns me at all, I've met Gina, and yes she's beautiful, but I could tell the chemistry wasn't there. But there's one that"

"You want to know what my relationship was with all the other women I've been linked to, am I right?" he looked at her with a kind look,

"I'm sorry Rick, it's really none of my business, but I have faults, one is jealousy, I mean once I care enough about someone to get jealous and well, eh"

"Hey, I know, you don't have to explain yourself, I mean my reputation isn't a great resume to present to someone who is looking for someone who is through being a player, but I can promise you, verify it with Alexis if you wish, 80% of those women were dates setup for publicity dates." He said sincerely

"It's not those women Rick, it's actually it's just one and you were never linked to her, but I have to know, did you have feelings for Detective Beckett? I mean she's attractive, but from everything I've heard about her it's job first, and the only relationship I heard about was with some FBI jerk, I met once." She rushed out so she wouldn't stop,

Rick took a deep breath, turned her head gently to face him as he spoke, "Karen, the short answer to the question is yes, I did care about Beckett, but she did nothing to reciprocate my feelings, hell we never even kissed or dated. She was too busy checking out other men and made it plain she wasn't going to be a notch on my bedpost. I can honestly say now, she doesn't hold a candle to you, I'm sorry but you asked and I will never lie to you, ever"

Karen became quiet, as she laid her head back down, Rick felt the tears trickle from her eyes and fall on his chest, he knew she was hurt. She deserved to know the truth.

"Was that one reason you were so willing to come over to the 18th to help out, I mean were you trying to get away from her, or were you trying to get over what I thought was a severely broken heart." She asked trying to hold back the tears,

"I left the 12th to accomplish two things, Beckett had gotten into a relationship and I couldn't stay and see her with another man, and I had no idea what precinct or who Bob wanted me to help with. When I walked into the precinct, I was attracted to you physically, that hasn't changed from the moment I laid eyes on you.

"It was your kindness that really made me fall and fall faster and harder than I ever had before. If you're asking me are you a replacement for Beckett or a stand-in, the answer is NO, I would never do that to anyone, and I hope no one would do it to me. I'm falling for you, but I don't want to crowd you and chase you away, you mean far too much to me.

"I'm sorry you're hurt, and please don't say you aren't I feel the tears and I know I caused them. I feel more for you than I have anyone in a long time, but we've been going so fast, I don't want you to dump me. It's scary, very scary for me, I've been married twice and feel more for you than I thought I could ever feel again. So, Karen, if you're asking is it Kate Beckett or you in my heart, my arms, my bed, I can swear to you, it's you, it's always you." He held her, as her tears flowed,

Finally, after a few minutes, she raised, up, looked him in the eyes, and said simply, "I believe you, Rick, I don't think anyone could fake the feelings we have, I know I can't and I understand how you would feel about going too fast, I thought we were as well, but I didn't want to, nor did I know how to slow us down.

"I was enjoying every touch, every kiss, and when you made me wait to have you, it proved to me, that you cared more about me than anyone ever had before. I'm sorry for getting jealous, but I warn you, it's a fault of mine, I'll try to control it, but I only get jealous of those I really, really care about." She smiled through her tears as he brought her in for a sweet kiss,

"Did we just have our first conflict? You know I can appreciate you being jealous, I am of you, very badly but I didn't think I had the right to be, so I didn't say anything. It pisses me off to see men gawk at you, you're so much more than a body, you, well you complete me." Rick said softly,

"You are jealous Rick? Why? There's no one, let me make that clear NO ONE but you. You were the second man I ever surrendered my all to, and God, if I had known what heaven it would be, I would have done it the first date. I know you care, you've been so patient, so gentle, but jealous, no need to be but it makes me feel even more special now" she kissed him, and they cuddled for the longest time.

"Let's make this our spot to solve any arguments, or hurt feelings, OK? Once I feel you next to me, I can never stay angry or hurt, I care about you Rick, really care." She kissed him gently,

"Perfect idea and I feel the same Karen, I care about you, a great deal," he responded.

The remainder of the day was spent just lounging together, walking on the beach, Karen prepared lunch, and Rick worked on the next few chapters of the book, for once he was ahead of schedule. He looked up as she walked into his office with his lunch, sat on his lap as they shared tuna fish sandwiches and chips and a coke, just enjoying the last day they were alone before the family showed up. God, she was enjoying having him all to herself as was her,

Chapter 14

Beckett Cabin, Upstate New York

Woodbourne NY

Later Same Morning

The ride was uneventful except for Kate to shoot longing glances, not at the owner of, but the bike itself. It was top of the line and must have cost a pretty penny, far cry from her working summers and revamping her bike with the help of her Grandpa. Jerry had said he had just retired from the Marines and relocated back to New York, and from what wasn't said was he was trying to reconcile with his parents after the murder of his sister.

Tough emotions for any family to endure, how well she knew. She seemed to remember a boy with Brenda when she was younger, but since the other girl was much older, she didn't want to be bothered with a little kid even though there weren't that many years between them. Brenda always had a sense of superiority if she recalled.

Kate remembered there were two summers in her teens when she went camping rather than accompany her parents, that must have been when Jerry made his last appearance there since he was only a few years older than her. She watched as he took the lead on the single land highway, the bike was really sleek, and well if she were honest, Jerry had a great body on him and wasn't hard on the eyes at all.

Stop that she thought, he probably has a wife, or at the least a steady girlfriend, as they traveled down the quiet country road until the little town came into view. Kate pulled ahead and directed them to the back entrance to the one store that had anything you wanted, even if you didn't know it when you walked in. It was piled with everything from hunting and camping supplies, to groceries, as well as serving as the local post office.

Jerry took his helmet off, and locked the bike, as he looked over to Kate, with a WTH look on his face.

"A bike that expensive is a target for thieves Jerry, even out here in the sticks, crime doesn't discriminate by address or zip code. It's better back here where the cameras are working, less temptation for the pro's" she smiled,

He smiled. "Spoken like a cop, you aren't a cop are you Kate?" he asked in all seriousness,

"Sorry, but Yep, Homicide Lead Detective, 12th Precinct, I'm just up here to get my head cleared from some pretty difficult cases," she said without a lot of emotion,

"Yeah, I understand, I've been involved with a few of those myself, although military law is much different than civilian, I am constantly reminded." He said, almost nonchalantly,

"Are you a lawyer?" she asked a bit shocked at his lack of normal ego and swagger that most attorneys always seemed to project, the Look at Me, I'm Special type of attitude. It would account for him being able to purchase such an expensive Harley, she thought.

"Guilty as charged Kate. I'm not licensed in New York yet, and they don't offer reciprocity from my California Bar, so I guess I'll have to sit for the exam once again IF I decide to stay but not looking forward to that," he grimaced,

"My parents were both attorneys, I started off that direction, but well life events put me on this trajectory, so I know how hard it is. You passed the California Bar, and you're concerned about New York? From what my Dad said, California is the hardest state, thus why we never moved and stayed in the cold of New York," she smiled,

"Yes, I passed the Bar there after completing my degree at Thomas Jefferson Law School out in San Diego, great school, great town. I worked part-time, with a law firm there as what they called "registered in house counsel", a great experience and allowed me to see quite a variety of different cases,

"The last tour in the Marines were pretty easy, I was stationed at Oceanside, which is North San Diego, but most civilians never heard of it. Camp Pendleton was the facility, and even though my MOS wasn't law, they allowed me to hang around the law library since they knew I was graduating and going to sit for the bar." He stated just as calm as if he were describing a parking ticket,

"So, you passed the bar, while still in the service, you mentioned MOS, which I think means Military Occupational Specialty, and do your parents even know?" Kate asked,

"No, not much use telling them, it's easier to stay the screw-up kid who worked his way up to what I just retired from, my MOS was 7502 which meant I was a Forward Air Controller, responsible for making sure the good guys got the direction to the bad guys and keeping our guys from blasting our own planes from the air. Three tours over there, and they decided they would shelve me at Pendleton, and allow me to become an instructor, the last three years." He said as again as he was talking about a weather report,

"Jerry, didn't your parents know where you were at, or what you were doing? I mean what if you were killed over there, don't you think they should at least know you were fighting for your country? I'm sorry, that's a personal question and none of my business, "she blushed,

"No, it's OK Kate, well Brenda found out, how and why I don't know. She said it was to check for some gene for some disease Dad had, but that was a load of BS, I think she had some guilt and wanted to be sure we were in good standing, I mean, I never held anything against her. She couldn't help she was the only child my parents had, or so it seemed.

"We talked for about an hour, then I had to leave for maneuvers, and she promised to keep it quiet but when I got back ten days later, I had to see the chaplain and the Red Cross. Both let me have it for not writing so I had to write one letter a week to my folks, so as usual, she couldn't keep a secret.

"The letters were about anything and everything except us, and as soon as I was Stateside, I didn't have to keep in touch, and they didn't bother until Brenda was killed. It was tough, so I refused the reenlistment, and started planning my return to New York. I came home for the funeral, and knew things would never change so I started looking around for what I wanted to do with the rest of my life" he said, a little more emotion,

"So, what did you decide Jerry, what do you want to do with your life, I mean you're still young and have your life ahead of you?" Kate asked, with a hint of a smile,

"I really don't know, I have a small law practice back in San Diego, not big, never wanted to be the next F Lee Bailey, anyway, but the way things are with my folks, I really don't think it matters where I'm at. Even in death, Brenda is still their only child, so I may head back to San Diego and see where things go or, I may suck it up and stay here to see if they will even let me help them in their golden years. The attitude they both have, they won't last a year before they lose the will to live if they haven't already."

"What about you Kate, your boyfriend know you're up here, talking to another biker dude, although I only have one tattoo, and no I won't show it." He laughed,

"Smooth way to ask Jerry, but no boyfriend, none that will put up with me or the hours of the job, I can be a real bitch I guess, I'm just beginning to see it and I didn't like what was shown to me. What about you, how many broken hearts are worse little Jerrys have you left scattered around the world, and is Mrs. Leor still in San Diego?" Kate asked, putting on her interrogation face to see if this was just one more guy looking to hookup for a night of sex, or if he was on the level.

He laughed, "Neither, no Mrs. Leor, never had time to do the interviews, plus at that time of my life, I really didn't want to leave anything, or anyone behind just in case I didn't come back. As for the little ones, nope, never came close, so it's been me a bachelor for the entire time. I really didn't have time to anything but eat, sleep, study, perform my duties at the base, and attend class or study groups, so I didn't even give it a try." He smiled,

They had finished their shopping and were heading back to where the bikes were parked, "Hey Kate, would you let me buy you lunch, I swear, no evil intentions, just a thank you lunch for listening and for showing me around, what do you say?" He looked shy, almost like a little boy,

"Normally I would say no, but since I know your family AND I have my gun, OK, the diner usually has good food at a reasonable cost." She smiled,

"Lead the way, and Thanks Kate, I appreciate being able to talk to another adult, it helps."

"Sure, thing Jerry, Let's eat, I am getting hungry now that you mention it."

XxX

18th Precinct

Tuesday after Memorial Day

Things were getting back to normal, well the new normal, since Karen and Rick had committed to dating each other exclusively, she never even saw the guest room at the Hamptons, Alexis had been right. It had been a beautiful long weekend, and the two days she and Rick had spent alone allowed them to discuss many things, including her tendency to get jealous, although he had never given her any reason to do so.

FLASHBACK TO THE WEEKEND

Alexis, Martha, and the guests that came to Rick's cookout Saturday evening made the weekend special. She overheard the comments, oh they look perfect together, or I wish a man would look at me just once in my life the way he looks at her every time she comes into the room, I think this one is serious, which made her feel like a high school girl all over again.

It was a great weekend, made even better when she learned their bedroom was soundproof and had locks installed to prevent Hurricane Martha from walking in as she pleased. She liked the lady, but she was often overbearing and inconsiderate of her grown son's privacy. She didn't hear it directly but she overheard Rick dressing her down, reminding her SHE was the guest, the homes were his, and if she didn't learn to mind her business the retirement home, he had threatened her with was still a viable option.

She often read when Rick was writing, his library was extensive, larger than some rural public libraries, so she never tired or had difficulty in selecting something of interest to her. Rick often called her as she sat or lounged on the couch as his fingers flew across the keyboard bringing the characters to life, to critique the passage he had written to ensure it sounded authentic. She admired how he poured himself into his work, forgetting to eat or drink until she showed up with his lunch tray or beverage.

She always sat in his lap, as they shared the meals she had made, and talked quietly about the plans for the remainder of the day. Often, they were late getting out of the house because Rick had come up with another scenario he had to capture on paper. She loved when he got excited, even about fictional characters, she loved just being near him.

Rick surprised her the night before they were to come home, Sunday, he had Janice his pilot fly them to a restaurant in Delaware for the evening. A beautiful meal and an evening of dancing with him uninterrupted by anyone or anything. He was always so thoughtful, and she could tell he was thinking of something as she held him on the dance floor,

"OK, your turn, what's on your mind Rick, I'm here for you, good or bad, so what's going on in that head of yours?" She whispered in his ear as he continued to hold her close and sway to the music.

"You noticed, eh? Guess, I'm not good at hiding things but I was just thinking the last few days have been so special, at least to me, it almost seemed like we had escaped all of the ugliness of the city and were living our fairytale lives. I know Gina thinks it's a fairy tale, since I'm ahead on the book, I probably can finish it with another chapter or two, but I want to go over that with you, but not tonight." He leaned back and kissed her,

"Oh, Rick, it's been heaven for me, even without you spoiling me like this, I enjoyed our walks on the beach, our shells, but most of all I've enjoyed our bedroom, yes I said OURS, and I know that's presumptuous.

"When we get back what would you think about spending some nights at my Condo, and me at the Loft, I'm not sure what image that would portray to Alexis, but seriously, I don't want to sleep without you, not unless I have to." She leaned back and kissed him sweetly on the dance floor, as his smile gave her the answer she was hoping for.

"If you hadn't noticed, half of my closet has been cleaned out for over two weeks, and of course, I feel the same way you do. As for Alexis, she knows how we feel, she also has her own morals and made it clear to me and her Grams that she was going to live with a man before she married him, too many divorces because people change when they are together for long periods of time. I think she will approve, especially since she already loves you." Rick whispered back and already had his hankie to give to Karen as her tears fell, this time they were tears of joy.

Karen wiped her eyes and enjoyed every minute with Rick until the car service showed up, letting them know they needed to leave. As they walked out hand in hand pressed something in her hand, and whispered, "Wait till we get to the car" as they left.

Once securely in and on their way, "You can open it now Karen, I hope you like it," he smiled

She opened it and found a beautiful necklace with a gold charm of two dancers, it had to be diamonds as their eyes, and it sparkled even in the soft light of the limo,

"Oh my God Rick, it's beautiful but it's not my birthday, why did you give me such a beautiful necklace?"

"There is some engraving on the back, as he opened his phone and hist the flashlight app, providing her enough light to read, KP & RC 3 Months and the today's date engraved on it,

"Oh, Rick it's absolutely perfect, you think I don't remember that afternoon three months ago today when you walked into the 18th and my life and changed it forever? That's a day I will never forget, and will always be thankful for as she hugged him,

"Please, can you put it on me, I want to wear it every day. You're so thoughtful, knowing a necklace can be worn but rings and bracelets tend to get caught on stuff at work, so Thank You, Happy Three-Month Anniversary to you as well," She kissed him and then surprised him with a small box that appeared out of her clutch purse,

"It's not much Rick, I mean, I really didn't know if I should or even if you will like it, but I wanted you to know that that day changed my life, you've already brought justice to a friend who I couldn't. You've taught me how to love, and God, I do love your family and being part of it, I don't want that to change. I'm not rushing you; I know we need to know a lot more about each other, but please know, these have been the best three months of my life.

He opened the box to see a lapel pin, NYPD in bold gold letters struck, and attached to it at the bottom was the word Detective, with the number in the middle, signifying he was an NYPD Detective for the 18th precinct, he eyes teared.

"Karen, this is official, they'll have your badge for this, I mean I love it but sweetheart not enough to get you in trouble," he whispered barely getting the words out,

"I have the official declaration that you are to be awarded this for your outstanding service, of course, it's all honorary, but your proclamation is hanging in your office if Alexis completes her promise which I know she will,"

Their phones chirped with a joint text with Alexis ring tone, "Hey Dad, Karen, hope this is where you wanted it hung Karen, and Dad don't be angry with her, she worked hard to keep this a surprise, Love you both, AC

Karen responded with Love you kiddo, thanks and heart emojis, and Rick with a big thumbs up, and be home soon, love you too,

"You even got my girl in on this, Thank You, Karen, this means more to me than you know". He kissed her, but it was only the warmup that would be coming later, she never tired of kissing her man.

Chapter 15

18th Precinct

9 Months Later

Today was the day, Karen could hardly believe the last year of her life. She had been introduced to the handsome writer, solved multiple cold cases, gained a family that loved her, and had traveled during her vacations with her boyfriend, all, after merely existing for almost thirty years.

Today the ceremony would be held as she officially was promoted to the position of Captain, and take over the 18th Precinct. Captain Vance had just been warming the chair for the last year, and finally was given the ultimatum retire or be fired. Because of the work she had done, well, Rick had done much of it, she earned the position as acting Captain, more or less an on the job interview for the full-time job. Detective Karen Pedersen had been the acting Captain since Vance left, and today the precinct would officially become hers.

She would become the youngest female to reach the rank of Captain in NYPD history and was still pinching herself to make sure it was real. The murder closure rate for her precinct was and had been the highest in the entire state of New York, a fact not lost on Commissioner Boyle and Mr. Mayor.

It seemed that no matter how hard others tried, they fell short of the closure percentage, and for the last three reporting periods, Roy Montgomery placed a distant second, each quarter. No one took the poor performance harder than one lead detective Kate Beckett, who was nearing the review time of her Performance Letter in her file, if her closures continued to dip, the letter would remain for another year. Roy was the benefactor personally from the cases closed with Rick and Karen's signature, since he had supervised at first, his CA (Corrective Action) note was removed from his file some months ago.

To add injury to insult, the 12th precinct had lost two female detectives, Roz Karpowski and Ann Hastings to the 18th via transfer requests. The old team was barely hanging on with Esposito, and Ryan growing tired of Beckett's outbursts and outlandish demands of they had to beat that woman, as Kate fell into old habits of long hours and demanding requests of her team.

Roz and Ann loved working with and for Karen, well Rick as well. Karen let the green-eyed monster of jealousy show only on one occasion, Roz kissed Rick thank you for his birthday gift to her a little longer than she thought was necessary, and let her feelings be known to her boyfriend. He soothed things over pointing out that he had known Roz and Ann long before he knew her, and if he had wanted to start up with them, the opportunity was always there at the 12th.

Karen apologized, and Rick smiled,

"Hey when you quit getting jealous, that's when I worry. And by the way, that Lieutenant Croner doesn't have to hand-deliver his reports to you every morning, he's a lurker, and I don't like it" Rick pouted,

"I'm sorry sweetie, she picked up the phone and pressed an extension, and gave some muffled instructions, then turned back to Rick. "From now on his administrative assistant Kelly will deliver them, so keep your eyes off of her, or I'll go back to Croner." She laughed and snuck a kiss to him behind the closed blinds and door.

The ceremony was planned to take place at 1: 00 PM to allow all shifts to attend, with ironically the 12th precinct handling their calls for the 90-minute ceremony. Alexis and Martha were in the audience and had presented her with a beautiful bouquet of flowers, one she was wearing in her hair, under her Police Hat, since it was a formal ceremony. As always standing by her side was her partner at work and for almost the last year, all things in life, her boyfriend Rick Castle.

She was surprised when Mayor Bob Weldon was presented, he would be the one actually performing the promotion ceremony as Commissioner Boyle pinned the Captain's bars on her dress blues. The ceremony was brief, with only the Mayor speaking,

"It's been almost one full year since the transformation of this precinct began, and what a transformation it has been. Homicide case closure rates are the best in any police department in New York, and well above the national average, as well as a marked improvement in all departments. The influx of new talent, both from within as well as from our own Academy and new hires, this is now a precinct cops are proud to say they work out of.

"This transformation has much to do with the leadership provided by Captain Karen Pedersen, who has been copied by many for her famous reply to any situation presented to her. No matter how difficult, how personal or complex, when you ask Captain Pedersen, or Karen as most of her troops will always know her as, her response is always the same four words, "How Can I Help?"

"It's not just an empty question, Karen makes things happen, and isn't afraid to go up the ranks, as I can personally attest to, she isn't shy to chew ass, no matter who's it is, (quiet laughter spread throughout the theater room), I see some of you have felt her wrath at times as I have. He smiled, but seriously, Karen is a fighter, for her people, for what's right, and for all of us to do what we say we will. She holds us to the task, just as she does you, and herself.

"Today is the first official day Captain Pedersen is in charge, but we all know this ceremony, this presentation, and this promotion is just the icing on the cake, Karen has managed the precinct and it's people for almost the full year. Congratulations Captain Pedersen, on a job well done and your long-overdue promotion. I'll always be only a phone call away, should you need anything, so God Speed and Good Luck" as Mayor Weldon stepped down

Commissioner Boyle strode to the microphone, "If you guys think I'm going to try to top that, you're crazy. I just want to add my congratulations and say the food is ready across the hall, consider yourselves dismissed," as a loud round of applause was heard.

Alexis rushed to Karen and just hugged her, she was now a freshman in college at Columbia and had counted on Karen to talk her Dad down on several occasions, they had become very close.

"We're so proud of you Karen, Congratulations" Alexis beamed,

"Yes, we are Karen, I'm so proud of you and the job you've done here" Martha added,

Karen turned and she fell into Rick's arms as he held her, the emotions finally setting in, as he gently rubbed her back, whispering in her ear, as the news crew filmed away. It was a good five minutes before Rick handed her his handkerchief and she dabbed her eyes, any doubts the two were a couple were erased with that exchange,

"I'm sorry Rick, I mean I should have been stronger, I mean the press was filming for God's sake," she said quietly,

"So, if it took anyone this long to figure out, we're a couple then they deserve to see it on the news" he laughed, I'm so very proud of you, more than you'll ever know. Through all this, you never changed, you never forgot what you told me was the most important things in your life, Alexis, Mother, and I. You proved that, so thank you," as he gently kissed her cheek, and wiped the remainder of her tears away.

XxX

12th Precinct

Same Time Frame

The television sets were tuned to the local news channel that was broadcasting the promotion ceremony, and it wasn't lost on anyone the sad look that engulfed Kate Beckett's face.

"Hey Bro, look there's Castle, he's still over there playing cop" Espo piped up,

"It's too bad you don't know how to play cop as you say, Detective, if you did perhaps, we wouldn't have so many unsolved cases and you wouldn't be asked to work longer hours. Seems whatever Rick is doing to play cop, it's working a hell of a lot better than your techniques" Captain Montgomery blasted him, as Kate shot him a look that could kill,

He sunk back in his chair, his face showing the embarrassment of being called out by the Captain in such a public setting. The Mayor's speech was heard as the camera panned to a split view of Commissioner Boyle pinning on Captain Pedersen's bars. As the camera panned out, Roz and Ann were wearing huge smiles as they clapped and showed genuine happiness for their new Captain.

"Hey Roz and Ann look good, God I never saw Roz smile so big the whole time she was here" Kevin blurted out,

Kate remained silent although the daggers her eyes were sending to her crew would kill if they were able to penetrate past her own personal space.

The breaking point came when Karen fell into Rick's arms and remained there, as he comforted her, Kate almost lost her lunch at the display of affection and ran for the ladies room when she pulled back and Rick wiped her tears and kissed her cheek after a while of the blah blah of the TV Reporter.

"Well, I guess the rumors are true, perhaps the wrong female detective was being followed by the press, apparently it's not the original muse identified to us. As you witnessed there is a definite connection between Detective, excuse me, Captain Pedersen, and Mr. Castle.

"Rumor has it that the character Nikki Heat, originally developed as he shadowed Detective Kate Beckett from the 12th precinct was changed shortly after Mr. Castle relocated to the 18th precinct by what we understand was by request from city officials.

"From our observations today, I would concur that it is no longer a rumor, and is very apparent that Mr. Castle isn't shy in protecting his girlfriend. It appears that it is true that Detective Beckett was just the source of the idea of the character, but Captain Pedersen is the cop who Nikki has been refined to emulate.

"We reached out to both Mr. Castle, his agent, and Detective Beckett to confirm this, we have yet to receive any response except Paula Haas, Mr. Castle's publicist, who responded simply we don't comment on Mr. Castle's personal life. No other responses were received."

Kate Beckett sat in her chair looking like someone had just kicked her puppy, sadness, and anger, yes anger at herself for throwing away the man that apparently was very much attached to Captain Pedersen. What the hell was that? She was the youngest woman to make detective in the NYPD and was on the fast track to Captain until Castle came into her life and it went to shit.

That wasn't fair and she knew it, it was her own actions that had cost her not only a working relationship with Rick but apparently, he didn't even consider her a friend. Things were changing at the 12th, and not for the good, hell Roz and Ann looked like they were enjoying their jobs and their new boss. The breaking point for both ladies had come when there was a temporary restructure in assignments, and they reported to Kate for less than two months before they both requested and received transfers.

She was just about to leave for lunch when Captain Montgomery stepped out of his office, "Detective Beckett, could I have a word?"

"Yes Sir, as she shut down her computer, gathered her purse, figuring she would leave for lunch after the brief conversation with Roy,

"Sit Down Detective," were the words as soon as she had entered his office,

"So, what is your plan to replace Detective Ryan?" he asked and she felt as if a knife had pierced her

"Sir? What do you mean replace Ryan? He's not going anywhere, at least that I know of" she said.

"How far behind are you on your emails Detective? I just caught up with mine, and I read this just a few minutes ago" as he turned his screen to allow Kate to read an official email, from Detective Ryan. It had an attachment to it, which appeared to be the formal resignation form issued by the HR Department.

Kate looked at the screen and couldn't believe what she was reading it was an email dated a week ago. Kevin Ryan was tendering his resignation effective 4 weeks. The email was still, formal but it was real.

"Dear Detective Beckett, Captain Montgomery,

I'm sorry to inform you of my decision to tender my resignation from the position of Detective, Second Class, NYPD for personal and professional reasons I do not wish to disclose. I understand the difficulty in staffing, so I am offering 4 calendar weeks' notice if you wish, or I can be out of the Precinct within the hour if you so choose. I wish to thank you both for the opportunities you have afforded me, and the greatest pleasure to have been of service to my fellow citizens of New York. Time, personal conditions, and other interests make this the right time to end this relationship and allow me to pursue other life dreams,

Sincerely,

Kevin M Ryan, Detective, Second Class, NYPD

Roy clicked on the attachment when Kate had finished reading the email, and it was the formal notice of resignation, on official NYPD forms, filled out, and notarized.

Kate sat numb, once again sucker-punched with one of her team leaving her, "he never said a word to me Sir" she finally mumbled,

"Well, technically Kate, he followed the book, on how to resign as required by HR Policy, BUT I thought your team was closer-knit than this. Are you telling me you had no knowledge of this before now? Any clues to his unhappiness, or reasons we are losing men with almost ten years' experience?

"I understand HR notified him if he waited three months, he would receive a partial pension on his anniversary date with the force, he refused. Something is motivating him to leave, and we need to find out what and see if you can save him from leaving. I don't have to tell you how the brass is going to interpret this as to your leadership skills Kate."

"Yes Sir, may I be dismissed, Sir?"

"Go straighten this mess out Detective, dismissed" he barked,

Kate left the office, forgetting her initial plan was to get out of the precinct for a few minutes and walked straight back to her desk. She ran into Ryan coming from the men's room and gave him a look of disgust, as she said, "Conference room now Ryan, we need to talk"

Ryan who was usually the one who followed her every command without hesitation, today showed a different side. "We do need to talk, but I'm meeting someone for lunch, and according to union rules you need to have requested this meeting at a minimum of 30 minutes in advance allowing me time to re-schedule any commitments. I'll be back after lunch Detective, we can talk anytime then" as he turned and walked away, leaving a shell-shocked Beckett even more in shock.

Kate returned to her desk, suddenly losing any appetite she may have had. Now she really had a mess, Ryan had given notice, he wasn't just transferring, he was leaving the force entirely. She knew that as close as he was with Javi, it wouldn't be long that if one was gone, they both would be and she would be trying to explain why, Karpowski, Hastings, Ryan, and perhaps Esposito had all left the 12th when they were under her reporting structure.

When Kevin returned exactly one hour later, he approached, her, "You still want to talk? I'm free" and he waited, not looking down or anything like the shy Catholic schoolboy he had been kidded about so much.

"Sure, let's grab the conference room" she replied, as he already began to walk in that direction.

Once the door closed, she waited for a second, but he wasn't cutting her any breaks at all, waiting for her to tell him why she wanted to see him, she was the boss.

"Kevin, I have to tell you I'm disappointed that you chose to resign and not even talk to me about it before you submitted it through official channels. I thought we were a team, I thought we cared more about each other than that. Why couldn't you come to me and tell me what was bothering you?"

"You have to be kidding me, right? I did, we all did, why the hell do you think Ann and Roz are at the 18th and not here? The short answer is you, Beckett. We're tired of you being the martyr and forcing us to work your schedule for what?

"Because you threw away Rick, a resource we needed and you chased him away, just like you tried to force us to work Memorial Day, just because you didn't have plans. I waited, hell Javi waited to hear one I'm sorry, but all you did was pile on more work.

"I hated to see the quarterly reports come out, I knew if you got your ass kicked by Pedersen it would mean misery for us, and it did. I tried to talk to you three times, and "If it's got nothing to do with this case, I don't want to hear it Ryan" was the quote I got. I wasn't looking but the opportunity found me, and it's too good to pass up, I'm sorry but I'm gone"

"Kevin why not wait the three months for your pension, I mean you worked hard for that?" she tried to explain,

"Kate, I get a pension, and the difference between 5 years of service and 10 is so pitiful, I'll make more in a month, so don't try that, it's a great offer and I took it. Good Luck Kate, you need to take a good look at yourself, you've changed and not for the good." As he walked out of the conference room with a sense of confidence she had never seen before, maybe he was right, maybe she needed to talk to Doctor Burke or someone. One thing was certain, things couldn't continue as they were or she would be back to patrol officer next.

She left the station, grabbed a cab to head home, and if Karma wasn't a bitch, then why did the driver have Cher cranked up so loud on his radio with a song, that really hit her in the soul.

If I could turn back time
If I could find a way
I'd take back those words that hurt you
And you'd stay
I don't know why I did the things I did
I don't know why I said the things I said
Pride's like a knife it can cut deep inside
Words are like weapons, they wound sometimes
I didn't really mean to hurt you
I didn't want to see you go
I know I made you cry,

Chapter 16

Castle's Loft

Later That Evening

Karen had taken the remainder of the day off; Rick has surprised her with a huge party at the hall across the street where Police Officers came and went as their schedules allowed, but she was amazed at just how many people had shown up to share her big day.

Perhaps the most touching moment was when the loved ones of her former college friend and roommate made an appearance to personally thank her for finally closing their loved one's case. Justice was done, and even though it would never bring Mary Jo back, at least it did provide closure for them. There was a moment of hugs, tears, then thanks for bringing them closure and congratulations from them all.

It was a bittersweet moment for Karen, she had never forgotten just how close Mary Jo had come to becoming a statistic of just another unsolved murder in America. She was very mindful that it was Rick, and his skills that had really broken the case open, and had a surprise for her boyfriend later that night when they were alone, it was something she had difficulty in keeping from him, they were so used to sharing everything, no secrets and she hoped he would understand once she told him.

The party lasted until after 8:00 PM when they finally called it a night and headed home to the loft, Martha to parts unknown, Alexis had left a few hours earlier to return to her dorm, so it was just the two of them.

"I'm so proud of you Captain, I know you worked your ass off for this, and you deserve it, Congratulations sweetheart," Rick gushed as they entered the town car.

"Rick, you know I would never have closed half of those cases, Roy would still have a CA note in his file, and Mary Jo's case would have wound up as a statistic, so sweetheart, it's you, that deserves most of the credit. You made me a better detective, hell, you made me a better woman, and you definitely made me a better lover" she kissed him, and laughed,

"Well that was a perk of the job, I enjoyed that, and there are no complaints from my end on the lovemaking part, how about you? Is it getting old or stale to you?" he asked with a serious look in his eye,

"I should beat the hell out of you, of course, it's not, Rick, every time we make love you seem to find a new spot, a new technique, and God, I wonder how I got so lucky, it will never grow old. I used to read novels or hear my girlfriends say they ached for their man's touch, I never understood that, until you. I ached for your touch, is there something bothering you Rick, you haven't asked me yet? Remember, we're supposed to be able to tell each other everything." She tried to reassure him,

"Well, is there anything you want to tell me, I mean you've been keeping a secret for at least a week now, I know you need your space sometimes, but please understand, where I'm coming from. My track record hasn't been the best in relationships, dating all the way back to college and I get worried when the dynamics of a relationship start to change" Rick was looking at her with the most serious look on his face he had ever shown,

She became worried, "Oh Rick, baby, NO, it's not that, never. Are you worried I'm about to break up with you? I would have to be a bigger fool than any of your past relationships to do something so foolish, and believe me it's not that. You're right I do have a secret, and I was going to talk to you about it tonight, but since it's out, now is as good as any to discuss this."

She reached over to her purse pulled out an envelope, with the Office of the Mayor logo and address on the return address, and handed it to him. "Please forgive me for keeping this from you, but I had to be officially installed before I could execute this offer," she said, tears coming to her eyes,

Rick had a look of bewilderment on his face as he gently opened the envelope and pulled out a formal letter, he glanced at the bottom and it was definitely Bob's signature, so he returned and began to read it slowly. When he finished, he looked up at Karen, who had tears rolling down her cheeks silently, knowing that she had hurt the man she loved, even if it was unintentional, it caused her pain.

"I don't understand Karen, this is an offer letter from the City of New York to serve as the Cold Case Czar for all of NYPD, reporting directly to the Mayor, and free to use any power necessary to solve cases, within guidelines established by precinct Captains, and the Commissioner, this is a job offer? That's what you've been hiding from me for a week?" he pulled her into him and gently rubbed her back as he kissed her tear-streaked cheeks.

She laughed through her tears, "What did you think I would be hiding from you? You are my life Richard Castle, I don't know what I would do if we ever lost each other, and I don't want to even think about that. I mentioned to Roy at the last meeting at One PP how you had been so instrumental in helping us close the 7 cold cases we had, and just remarked it was a shame all of the NYPD couldn't use your talents.

"I should have known better, the next thing I know I'm on a call with Roy, Commissioner Boyle, and Mayor Weldon, and they are presenting me with this to make the offer to you, look at that fantastic salary you will be earning" she laughed,

"A Dollar, One Dollar" He laughed,

"They knew you wouldn't accept a paid position, but under the city charter, you must be paid to be considered an employee, so the annual salary of one dollar was approved by the legal department, the statues say paid, not how much" she laughed,

"But where would I work, I mean Karen you're the only reason I still go to the precinct, you have to know that. It stopped being about the books ages ago."

"That's why they are moving Sargent Larson down the hall, your office will have a doorway cut through to mine, so you or I can close it when necessary making them private offices. Rick, just a warning, this means all of NYPD, including the 12th and Detective Beckett from time to time.

"I know things ended horribly between you two, and well, I just want you to know that I trust you, I always have even before we committed to just dating each other. Please don't let that hold you back, besides, she's not going to be coming over to the 18th and trying to win you back with me sitting in on your meetings, or at least only one doorway away, remember, I'm the jealous type." She smiled, and kissed him gently, then whispered,

"I'm so sorry you even thought those horrible things, I wish I could have told you but officially I think it was the first test of my Captain's position they wanted to put me through, it was hell, believe me." She said half smiling half crying,

"I'm sorry for being so stupid and insecure, you promised me to be faithful, and you have been. Old habits are hard to break, and sometimes it's just too good to be true, waking next to you, and feeling so happy." Rick admonished himself,

"Well, we're home, and since this technically was an issue, you owe me make up sex for that, and congratulatory sex for the promotion," she smiled kissed him, and definitely got the engines revved up."

"Oh, the punishment phase, I will gladly accept that love, just you wait, I will make you pay for this" and he was true to his word, she paid several times, but wouldn't change it for anything in the world.

XxX

Kate Beckett's Apartment

Later Same Evening

Kate never hated a cab ride more than the one she had just endured, it seemed the cabbie was in love with Cher and had that fucking song on loop, she heard it most of the way home until she yelled to turn it off or let her out of the fucking cab. The Cabbie looked at her like she had two heads but turned the volume lower so only he could hear most of the song, too late, the lyrics were now stuck in her mind.

Who the hell wanted to turn back time anyway, what a stupid fucking song, how did it get to be a hit, had to be Cher showing more skin than the song was worth? Kate Beckett was pissed off, hurt, disgusted, and running out of friends, or allies quickly. Kevin leaving and not talking to her felt like a cold slap in the face. She entered her building, and gathered her mail, just as she got to her door, she noticed something outside, what the hell?

It was a beautiful bouquet of flowers from Jerry, the lawyer she had been seeing on the down-low since their chance encounter a few months ago, nothing serious as they both had tons of issues to work out before they could be a good partner to anyone.

They had been to dinner a few times, and out dancing once, but that night was ruined when she was called out to a case. So far, the romantic part had gotten as far as a few good night kisses, Kate knew that Jerry was still struggling with the decision to stay in New York, or return to his more familiar surroundings and friends in San Diego. She liked him, he was honest and open, but he wasn't Rick, hell that ship probably sailed anyway.

She bent over and picked up the flowers, they were expensive that much she knew about them, and the card was tucked neatly on one of the stems, she gently pulled it, she opened the card to read,

"Kate, please forgive the impulsiveness, I was at the airport, and caught part of the newscast concerning the 18th precinct today. It had to be a tough day for you, so I just wanted to cheer you up a little if I could. If you need to talk you know the number, I'm in San Diego for three days wrapping up some business, be back next Saturday. Call me if you wish, hope these brightened your day just a bit,

Always,

Jerry"

He was really a sweet man, and she had been totally honest with him during one of their dinners, even telling him she thought she was in love with Rick and didn't want to lead him on. It was great to have someone to go out to a play, or dinner with, but not at the expense of hurting him, he was much too nice.

He just looked at her, and replied, "Who said I wanted anything more than a friend in New York I could talk to, or go out to dinner with. I understand Kate, and thanks for telling me, but you're not leading me on, now that you have that off your chest, relax and just be a friend, that's what I need more than anything now."

Kate was still reeling from the day she had endured as if it wasn't bad enough to witness the promotion and the brass sing the praises of Castle's girlfriend, the youngest female to make Captain in the NYPD, she had failed in trying to talking Ryan out of leaving the force. This was the lone bright spot of her entire day, the flowers and their lovely scent, and Jerry being kind enough to send her something to cheer her day.

She had placed them in two vases, she didn't have a single one large enough to fit the entire bouquet and placed one in her bedroom, and one on the counter. She picked up her phone and searched her contacts, she still hadn't assigned a speed dial to him yet, not sure of how long or how far this would go, and when she found his information pressed the key to send a text.

"Hey, Jerry,

Thanks for the lovely bouquet, it was so huge I had to split it into two vases. It was truly my bright spot of today. Not sure what your schedule is like, but I'm off, not even on call if you want to call later, I didn't want to interrupt any of your meetings so call me if you wish,

Thanks again,

Kate"

She liked Jerry, but as for romantic, he was cute, had a great body, but there wasn't the spark there. After their discussions about her possibly being in love with Rick, she doubted she felt like anything more than a friend to him as well. She still didn't believe that he hadn't had a relationship during all the time he was gone, perhaps one that had ended in heartbreak, which would explain his reluctance to get burned again.

She was certain they both had fallen into the dreaded "Friends Zone", and for now that didn't include benefits. Time would tell if that would change, she thought as she brushed another vision of Rick and Karen out of her mind that seemed to be playing a full-length feature tonight.

She had just thrown out what was left from whatever it was she picked up for dinner from the corner deli into the garbage and poured herself a glass of the good wine, of course, he had come from Rick, she was rationing it, knowing the only way she would taste it again would be to spend a week's salary on her own new bottle. As she returned to her favorite chair, with a book by Patterson, her phone rang with Lanie's ring tone.

"Hey Lanie, what's up, thought you and Javi were going out to dinner and a show tonight." She remarked casually,

"Well, one of us remembered, the other is getting drunk with his buddy and soon to be ex-partner at the Old Haunt. Kevin and he went for one drink, that was 5 hours ago, so that boy is in trouble when he's sober enough to remember me screaming at his ass" Lanie was pissed, and Kate didn't blame her.

"Gee, I'm sorry Lanie, I'm sure he will be too once you get through with him," she tried to smile through her pain,

"Well, that wasn't the reason I called, I'm sorry you had such a shitty day as well. God did they have to play the entire ceremony on the TV's for everyone to see and hear, it's bad enough he's over there, but that must have really hurt, I'm sorry Kate" Lanie said sympathetically,

"Why would it hurt Lanie, Castle and I never were together, I mean he left because he was asked to go over there. It worked out for him and Pedersen, it didn't crash and burn like Tom and I did." She said, not even convincing herself,

"Un Huh. You telling me or yourself that Kate Beckett, it's all over your face, your actions, every day, even Demming said he never stood a chance with you as long as you were in love with Castle." Lanie replied,

"Lanie, who said I loved him, Castle I mean," she choked out,

"Kate, you're never going to get over it, if you don't first admit you felt something for him, and well frankly you fucked up and threw it away. It cost you, Roy, and even the 12th all because you tried some high school prank to make Castle jealous, and when that didn't work it turned mean and hurtful. Then he was gone, and frankly so were a lot of your friends." She said,

"Well Karpowski and I were never that close, and Ann, well I was only a mentor to her for a year, so they did what they wanted to do, not because of anything I did Lanie, why do I get the blame for them requesting transfers?" she raised her voice, becoming tired of the same argument she had been having, and loosing with Captain Montgomery for the last several months.

"What about Kevin? Don't tell me his leaving isn't tearing you apart? What did he tell you anyway? I know he and Javi had a hell of a falling out when he first talked to him about leaving. Javi called him a traitor and accused him of not having YOUR back Kate. I swear sometimes I think he cares more about you than he ever does for me and if I didn't know better, I would put money on you two having a history." Lanie spouted,

"Lanie, what the hell are you talking about, Javi and I are teammates, friends that's all it's ever been or will be. Where the hell did that come from anyway? What did Kevin tell him about leaving anyway? If you want to know if I am hurt that he's leaving and the way he went about it, Hell yes, I am.

"I thought he would come to me and talk, not just go through the fucking HR Procedure line by line, because I was behind on emails it was Montgomery that asked me what I planned on doing to replace him that even made me aware he was leaving, that was embarrassing, to say the least." Kate was still hurt and angry and didn't try to hide it,

"Kate, Javi and he both have approached you a number of times, the quote you threw at them was demeaning at best, Kate, what the hell were you thinking, these are grown ass men, not little boys you can dismiss with a verbal scolding." She wasn't backing down,

"OK Lanie, you know more than you're letting on, we both know that Kevin didn't fart without asking Javi's opinion first, and you said they had a falling out, so where is he going that is paying him so well, he can forego an additional 5 years on his police pension?" Kate was firing it back now,

"I know where Kate, but believe me, you're not going to like it, not one little bit. I really shouldn't tell you; I did promise the guys but they probably knew I would cave and tell you, it's easier if you hear it from me anyway" Lanie rambled,

"Lanie, God Damn it, tell me where?" Kate was almost screaming at this point.

"OK, but remember you asked for it, hell you demanded to know"

"Lanie SPILL NOW" Kate barked out,

"He's working for Rick; he's going over to head up RCE Private Investigations as General Manager and a chance to buy into it if things go well. Rick doubled his pay, and benefits, if he could start within one month, I guess they got some big event coming up he wants Kevin to take charge of or something." Lanie blurted out

"Son of a bitch, Karpowski, Hastings, and now Kevin, who the hell did the SOB leave me with Lanie? Even you have to see it's a plot to make me look bad, he knows damn well that letter is up for review, and if I don't show improvement in our closures it will stay for yet another God Damn year, he's really screwing with me now Lanie." Kate was on a roll, she was screaming so loud, Lanie held the phone back from her ear, her sometime lover, sometime boyfriend, Esposito was beside her, and he knew the worst was yet to come when his news hit."

Kate, being fair, Karpowski and Hastings SOUGHT a transfer, Rick had nothing to do with them leaving the 12th, they had enough of what they called the Captain's pet getting away with murder so instead of making things worse for you or Roy, they transferred, it just so happened they got their wish to go to the 18th.

"Well, don't tell me he didn't enjoy seeing me lose face and two experienced detectives to his girlfriend, Miss youngest captain in the NYPD now, quite an achievement he pulled off. He got his revenge with me, and then some and he never said a word. He went over there by request and like some moth drawn to a flame he pulls all the best people to him, who's next Lanie, My God, it's just me and Javi now." She was almost in tears she was so pissed off,

"Kate, about that, I mean you and Javi, I mean, I, eh, well don't put too much stock on Javi being there for you much longer as well. He's pissed at you, at Rick for stealing his friend and partner, although I must say Rick only did what he did when he found out that Jenny was pregnant and having a lot of problems.

"Kevin was trying to work a second job to pay the bills when Rick found out, the offer came to him over a quick lunch and what did you expect him to do, say no?

"Javi is thinking about going back to the 54th, and getting out of homicide, he may go back to the street gang unit, now that so many things have changed over here. He's really questioning if he was cut out to be a homicide cop, and he doesn't see any future when he's always going to be your fetch dog, running down one lead after another, but never getting the chance to build a theory on any of the profile cases.

"He's well aware that he has a lot of faults, and has caused you some problems, but the gang unit, well Kate after I talked to him, I saw a passion come back to him that's been gone for so long. He's talking to the department lead over there next week, so don't be surprised if it's down to you and a new team." Lannie said sadly, she knew Javi had already made his mind up but was trying to let Kate down easy,

"Well, that's great, just fucking great. You know what, who needs them, any of them, Castle, Kevin or even Javi, tell him to go on and leave, I'll solve it myself" Kate lashed out,

"Kate, I'm going to hang up now before your anger spills over and your mouth writes a check your ass can't cash, remember, Javi is my boyfriend, and I've heard enough. If you think he's being disloyal, that's on you, I'm trying to tell you, Kate, it's not all about you, think before you speak.

"You're a great cop, no one disputes that, but you're only fair when it comes to being a friend, and a downright failure when it comes to being a team leader, Good Night Kate" and the click let Kate know her friend had just hung up,

Chapter 17 EPILOGUE

TEN YEARS LATER

San Diego

Kate was just returning home from a day out shopping, when she was greeted by Jerry, her live-in for the last 9 years, with her favorite cold drink. She had to admit it was more like having a roommate in college with the occasional booty call, she was free to see other men, and he other women, but neither had. After 9 years and counting it had just become routine to live their lives as a couple.

Sex was just that, sex, it wasn't horrible, but it wasn't great, it gratified her physically but she never got over one man from New York, and Jerry wasn't a fool. He knew she loved Richard Castle and always would, but he provided a great living for them and even hired Kate to become his private investigator for his law firm when she had been offered early retirement or discharge by the NYPD during the second year after they had met.

Moving to a new city, and a new job seemed like a great idea, especially considering that she had no one left in New York after her father passed away suddenly from a massive heart attack almost 7 years ago. She hadn't spoken to Lanie, Kevin, or Javi since his funeral, in fact, that was the last time she saw them, and had been back to New York only once to settle her father's estate. It was also the last time she saw Rick and Karen Castle, and his twin boys.

They seemed happy and Karen had retired to become a stay at home Mom in Albany where Rick had relocated. He served as the Cold Case Czar for five years, until Karen had retired to stay home, and then he resigned. That was when it was revealed that they had secretly wed four years earlier, right before Kate was given the ultimatum.

She worked with Rick on only one cold case before she was reassigned to IAD, a job she detested, and her performance showed. Her experience with him was like that of working with a complete stranger, which he had become. Roy had fought hard to keep her job, but Boyle was insistent, and she was moved to Internal Affairs where she spent the last 19 months of her police career, hating each and every day.

Nikki Heat was never resumed and remained a one-hit-wonder of his books, when he changed characters to those based on Roz Karpowski and Ann Hastings, almost like a Cagney and Lacey, but sluttier, as he would say. It was a string of 8 Best Sellers, none of which she had read or purchased.

She had sent her condolences via flowers and a personal call to Evelyn Montgomery when Roy passed away a few years later, even though Jerry encouraged her to make the trip. She had been hurt deeply by all of the events her actions had caused, she really hadn't known just what she had until she lost it, and now there was no going back.

Lanie had tried to keep in touch, even sending pictures of her children in Christmas Cards, after she married a doctor from New York-Presbyterian Hospital, she had given Javi a time limit, and time ran out on his non-committal to a permanent relationship with her. After three or four years without any response, even loyal Lanie had given up and moved on.

Kate's pleasure now was reading Alex Conrad, a new novelist who wrote much like Rick used to do, shop, and occasionally checking in with the 15 investigators she had working for her at KBI or Kate Beckett Investigations. She hired some very talented people, and one even caught the lead that eventually led to the Feds to investigate, arrest, and finally convict William Bracken for her Mom's murder.

She and Jerry would often sail to a remote location for shopping, or dining on his luxury yacht, which helped her get through some days, but she thought often of how things may have been. She also volunteered at a battered woman's shelter and had become heavily invested in local politics, eventually running and winning a State Senator's position based on women and minority rights platform.

Travel to and from the state capital as well as her other causes kept her busy, and as happy as she had accepted, she would ever be. She had accepted her relationship with Jerry for what it was, it wasn't love but it wasn't bad to paraphrase an old country song.

If only was a thought she thought many times daily, but time marched on and left her behind. Time waits for no one, and tomorrow is never promised, lessons she learned the hard way, but she was happy that at least Rick was happy, she was proud that had matured to that state of mind.

Rick seemed to have moved on with his life, along with his now-wife Karen and young twin sons he had everything in life he ever wanted. He retired from writing and traveled with his family for the next several years, never once thinking about what might have been, life had been good to him.

Rick had reworded one of his favorite sayings, "sometimes it's best if the heart doesn't always get what the heart wants, especially when there is another heart willing to be everything you wanted it to be without hesitation," as he and Karen stayed closer than ever.

A/N: I was playing a ton of old songs, ancient to some readers the other day when this came on. This fiction was sparked by this song and a memory of a very hurtful time for me. I didn't get the girl, things didn't all work out, and yet to my surprise the sun still rose the next morning, and I wound up with a very happy and very fulfilling life. Sometimes the heart may want what the heart wants, but the Universe tells us there's a better plan. Remember the songs from back then weren't big on content, but this had enough to take me back to that very moment, hope you enjoy a different take on the couple.

Song by Rail Donner

Peaked at # 4 in 1961

You don't know what you've got until you lose it
You gave me you-your love but I abused it
And now I'm sorry for the things I didn't say
'Cause I know now I acted in a foolish way
(Oh yeah) uh-huh-huh (oh yeah) oh-oh-yeah

You don't know what you've got until you lose it
You gave me you-your love but I misused it
I never knew how lonely loneliness could be
And now I need you, dear, as you once needed me
(Oh yeah) uh-huh-huh (oh yeah) oh-oh-yeah

So now if you'd come to this lonely heart you own
I'd give you all my lovin' like you've never known
(Bung, bung, bung, bung)

You don't know what you've got until you lose it
You gave me you-your love but I misused it
And now I'm sorry for the things I didn't say
'Cause I know now I acted in a foolish way
(Oh yeah) uh-huh-huh (oh yeah) oh-oh-yeah

oh-oh-yeah
(Oh yeah) uh-huh-huh (oh yeah)