-Future-
"I wish I could bring you to the party with me, but we're not allowed any plus-ones tonight".
"Hm…well, when you're a big rock star you'll be able to bring whoever you want…"
"Excuse me, miss," the newest bartender approaches Cosima's party. "This is for you," he hands a Mojito to the red-haired girl by her side. Ever since Delphine stopped talking to her, she's made a point to avoid hook ups with blonde girls at all costs. Not that she's been hooking up with many people lately.
"Oh, thank you. It's a bit early for alcohol," she responds in a high-pitched, giggly voice. "Who's it from?"
"I was told to give you this note," he hands her a little folded piece of paper, his fingers trembling nervously – it's probably his second or third day. He leaves Cosima with her date.
"Uh…" she stutters for a moment after unfolding the paper, and then looks up at Cosima with her brow raised. "I've got to go. Bye," she slips her purse over her shoulder and leaves the note and drink on the counter.
"Oh…okay…do you want me to call you?" Cosima shouts over the noise of the place. The woman doesn't turn back or answer and she's out of the building within seconds. "What the fuck?"
Cosima flips the small slip of paper over to see what upset her date so abruptly. She clenches her jaw and rolls her eyes when she's finished reading. Cosima inspects the area – the tables, the dancefloor, the bar counter – but can't seem to find who she knows to be the sender of the message.
"You," she snaps at the bartender, "Where did she go?" He nods his head toward the hallway behind the stage.
She jumps off the bar stool and weaves her way to the other side of the liquor shelf, past the make-shift backstage room she brought Delphine to ages ago, and through the door that leads to the adjoining restaurant and private event and conference rooms. She doesn't have to go far. Through the small window of conference room number two, she sees Delphine pulling a chair out and sitting at the end of the table in her work clothes with a glass of water.
Cosima shakes her head a moment and tells herself to just leave, not react, not let herself be around that woman, but she can't. She opens the door as calmly as she can, slips into the room, and leans against the wall near the door. The whole thing is a bit too familiar. If she didn't know any better, she'd wait for the blonde to make eye contact before speaking, but Cosima knows she won't.
"Are you just going to start coming here every day to scare off my dates?" Cosima starts in a huffy voice, crossing her arms.
"I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about. I'm here for a meeting," Delphine replies smoothly and coolly, like always.
"Meeting? Yeah, I totally believe that," Cosima holds up the slip of paper, "It's painful, but don't worry, Cosima. Chlamydia is only temporary. Hang in there," she reads aloud.
Delphine can't restrain her smirk. "I'm sorry, I wasn't aware you were having health issues," she replies, crossing her arms.
"Delphine, it's your fucking handwriting," Cosima seethes, trying to contain her rage. "What, you don't want to be with me, but I can't have anyone else either? That's fucked up, are you just trying to isolate–"
"Sorry about that, my son – oh," another well-dressed woman walks through the door, pausing when she almost runs into Cosima. She looks familiar. "Did you need something? Or…"
"Nope, I don't need a damn thing from in here," Cosima sneers, brushing past the woman and stomping back down the hall.
Delphine bites her lip, feeling guilty about sabotaging Cosima's romance. She shakes the feeling away, though, and continues with her meeting.
Present
"You're early," Cosima comments, already at the bar when Delphine approaches.
"You didn't tell me when to be here," she shrugs and flags down the bartender. "Black Russian, please".
The same neutral bartender from yesterday nods robotically.
"I thought it was White Russian?" Cosima asks once the man is off to make the concoction.
"White Russian is a variation," Delphine answers with a short glance at the brunette. "You should taste it. If you like it, I'll get you one".
"I don't know. Pretty sure it's a vodka kind of drink," she sasses.
"No vodka, that's the variation. White Russian adds vodka, Black Russian is vodka-free," Delphine thanks the bartender once the drink is set in front of her, subtly raising her eyebrows when he gives her a suspicious look. "You'll like it, I promise. Don't sip it, though. If you want the full flavor, you have to take a drink like you would a soda".
"Fine," Cosima takes the glass and quickly does as she's told. Then, setting the glass down, she shakes her head vigorously. "You dirty fucking liar"
"Or maybe it's cream, they add. Yes, they add cream to a White Russian. Vodka is in both. Oh dear, you've been misinformed. So sorry," Delphine fakes her sympathy and even looks at Cosima while she does. Apparently, the act is worthy of eye contact.
"Even if you tried to make that convincing, I wouldn't believe you," she glares back at her. "Now, come on. I must punish you".
"Punish me?" Cosima pulls Delphine's wrist until she slides off the seat and follows. "What for?"
"Oh, don't even try to act innocent," she scoffs. "You know your crimes".
Delphine smiles and wraps her fingers around Cosima's wrist. They walk toward the side of the stage and through the short gates surrounding the area. Cosima leads them up a few steps to the side of the stage she's usually stationed.
"My punishment is…a tour?" Delphine glances around the area, which looks messier up-close.
"Not quite. Here," Cosima sits and pats the chair next to her. Delphine hesitates a moment, but eventually sits down. "You are the mixer's assistant tonight".
"I hate to ruin your plans, but I don't have any mixing knowledge or experience," she sips her drink and glances over all the lights and buttons.
"Hence the assisting role. Just press that button or that button when I tell you," she points to two identical buttons next to each other in the middle of the switchboard. Yellow and green.
"And what if I make a mistake? Or I could just refuse," Delphine sets her drink on the floor next to her chair.
"Then you'll have those guys coming back here asking you what the hell you're doing. And I'll totally throw you under the bus, too," she points at three tough and angry-looking women on stage. "What would you do then?"
Delphine smiles, and then responds in a frantic voice, "Je ne parle pas anglais. Cette femme m'a juste forcé à venir ici et m'a dit d'appuyer sur les boutons. Je ne connais rien aux ordinateurs," she motions to the flashing lights in front of her and shrugs to reinforce her inexperience.
"So, your plan is to seduce them? Okay, good luck". Cosima winks and starts arranging wires.
Delphine forces the smile back and shakes her head. "And I won't be distracting you from your job?"
"As long as you don't do something especially distracting. I can work around the baseline distraction of you just being here. Same as when you're sitting at the bar". Cosima puts a pair of headphones on and waits for sound checks to complete.
The group doesn't take long to prep and greet the unenthusiastic crowd, most of whom look like they're barely old enough to be there. Delphine watches Cosima's attention move from her laptop to the group on stage. Her hands aren't rushing all over the keyboard as Delphine had imagined. They're still and tense for a few seconds before either flicking a switch or slowly pushing controls up or down.
Delphine hardly registers the music, too distracted by her host. From the bar, Delphine can't see beyond the little lights, but being up here with her is a different experience. She feels odd sitting next to Cosima without the woman's full attention.
"Hey," Cosima nudges her arm. "That one," she points at the button on the left. Delphine pushes it down until she feels a small click. She doesn't hear a difference in the music, though.
"Does that button even do anything?" Delphine asks once the group's third song is over and they're all taking a beverage break.
Cosima nods and points at the ceiling, "Lights. Didn't you notice? That's almost all we're doing tonight," Delphine shakes her head and examines the system above her that she's never seen before. "So, are you having fun?"
"No," Delphine pouts.
"Good. I chose an effective punishment," Cosima comments in a cocky tone.
Delphine glares at the woman for a second, looking her over. Tonight, she's wearing a short, tight, red dress, whereas most nights she wears skinny jeans and a showy shirt. "Was my staring distracting?" Delphine asks.
"No, I'm used to you staring at me while I'm up here," Cosima replies matter-of-factly, signaling to one of the performers.
"How do you know I'm staring at you? You always face away from the bar and you hardly ever look back".
"One, I can physically feel the force of your borderline-obsessive ogling. Two, if I had any doubt, you just eradicated it. If you weren't staring, you wouldn't know the frequency of my looking back," Cosima smirks with a dirty glare.
Delphine smiles with something close to embarrassment, but not quite. "What would distract you?"
"Like I'd give you ammunition," Cosima shushes her as the band starts their next song. She returns to her concentrating face, but Delphine can see she's a little more inattentive now. She stares at her with more force, gawking at her body without subtlety. Cosima is able to stay on task, but there's a trace of a grin developing gradually.
Delphine waits until the smallest of smirks makes an appearance, and then slips her hand on Cosima's thigh, just above her knee. The smirk falls and Delphine can see Cosima pause her breathing. It takes only a second before she adjusts and puts ninety percent of her focus back into her devices.
Delphine isn't ready to give up, though. She waits a minute or so, and then moves her hand about an inch, just as Cosima did the night before. She continues this and it isn't until her hand has made it almost to the hem of Cosima's short dress that the smirk reappears.
The brunette reaches over the blonde to press the yellow button herself. Delphine notices the lights dimming slightly as the song comes to its conclusion. "Can I help you, miss?" Cosima asks when the music finally goes silent.
"Hey Cos, thanks," a young woman approaches the area they're occupying. Delphine removes her hand but makes the motion slow enough to trigger goosebumps on Cosima's thigh.
"No problem. Hope you don't mind. I brought a friend. She was extraordinarily unhelpful," Cosima hands her headphones to the woman.
"Hey, I'm Heather," she introduces. Delphine just nods.
"She's also mute," Cosima looks back at Delphine and smiles a frightening smile. "Her name's Gertrude Clusterfuck. She's from the deepest depths of the bible belt and she's traveled here to become the city's finest silent prostitute".
Delphine swats Cosima's arm. Heather doesn't seem fazed, "That's really inspirational. Good luck".
Delphine glares at Cosima, but she just beams triumphantly. "Alright well, I'm practically a personal blow-up doll and this one's got to practice. I'll see you later," Cosima takes Delphine's hand and pulls her back in the direction of the crowd.
"Thanks again, Cos. Bye Ms. Clusterfuck," Heather calls from her seat before she puts her headphones over her ears.
Cosima keeps a tight grip on Delphine's hand as she drags her through the hipsters crowding around the stage. They manage to only bump, swipe, and completely crash into just half the audience. Cosima lets go of her hand when they reach the door so she can hold it open.
"Where are we going?" Delphine asks.
"Hmm," Cosima hums, starting to stroll up the sidewalk. "Dunno. Where do you want to go?"
"I don't care, as long as you don't make me walk there," Delphine scoffs. Cosima turns around and sees that the woman hasn't made a move to follow her.
"Ugh, well I don't have a car, so…" Cosima stands still for a moment while Delphine turns the opposite direction toward the small side parking lot. Tonight, she's wearing a black dress, only long enough to cover everything necessary. If the blonde bent over, Cosima is sure she'd be graced with a full view. Though it lacks coverage at the bottom, the sleeveless top portion makes up for it by hiding every inch of her skin up to her neck.
"Are you coming?" Delphine glances over her shoulder, fully aware of what's keeping the brunette.
"Yeah, yes. Sorry, just objectifying you," Cosima admits. She knows it's obvious so there's no point in hiding it, and nothing seems to bother the woman anyways. Which only makes Cosima want to search harder for something that would affect her. Thus far, she's found just one thing. The only instance her façade was broken, even if it was just half a second, was when she touched her leg in the booth the night before.
"You still have to tell me where we're going," Delphine stops, clicking the button on her keys to unlock one of the many beautiful cars in the lot.
"Goddammit. Of course, this is your car," Cosima looks the sleek vehicle over, not unlike how she looks Delphine over. It's jet black, and practically sparkling in the streetlights. It harmonizes with Delphine's personality, especially in her current outfit.
"Is that a problem?" She questions smugly, not waiting for an answer from Cosima and sliding into the driver's seat.
"I think," Cosima begins, climbing in the passenger seat and admiring the interior. "I think I want to see where you live. You must have a mansion".
"I don't think it meets the qualifications," Delphine turns the key until the machine grumbles and breaks into a purr.
They drive for a few minutes without talking. She's a smooth driver. Cosima wouldn't doubt that every time she uses the vehicle it feels like a joy ride through the countryside.
"You know," Cosima ponders, watching the tall buildings turn into a houses and traffic lights turn into streetlamps. "You are really fucking bizarre".
Delphine hums and gives a slight nod. "So are you, Cosima".
"No, I'm…quirky. I'm charming in a silly way," she disagrees. "You, though. You are unreadable. Half the time I think you're playing hard to get, but then other times, you're just awfully blunt. I don't know what to do with you".
The blonde hums again, pulling into a long driveway and stopping behind another luxury car. She parks, kills the engine, and then looks directly at Cosima – an uncommon practice. "You can do whatever you like with me, Cosima," she counters, exiting the car and giving the brunette no time to react. She's not sure if she actually means it, and she's not sure why she feels the need to be so seductive, but she loves doing it with Cosima.
"See," Cosima whisper-yells as she follows the blonde to the front steps. Most of the windows are dark aside from a few on the first floor. "Like that," she complains.
Delphine turns to smirk at her before unlocking the door and entering the house. Cosima follows, noting the echo of their heels clacking on the hardwood floor. The foyer is dim and only leads to an even darker hall. Delphine throws her keys onto a small table before leading Cosima around.
"Your kitchen is almost as big as my entire apartment," Cosima steps into the spacious area, maneuvering around the island that doubles as a stove top. Delphine flips the lights on, making every visible surface shimmer.
"Babe?" A male's voice calls from another room. "That you?"
"No," Delphine answers with a sigh, walking in the direction of the voice. "It's your friendly neighborhood murderer and I'm here to steal your jewels".
Cosima follows at a distance, watching the blonde find her way to the living room. A large television takes up the stone wall, playing a muted music video. Cosima stops at the entrance and leans on the door frame. The coffee table holds several stacks of paper and a brown leather laptop case.
"Mm, anything else you want to do before you kill me?" The only thing visible from Cosima's vantage is a pair of feet propped up on one side of the couch. The blonde saunters in his direction and leans over the back of the expensive-looking piece of furniture.
"No," she shrugs. "But I brought an accomplice. She and I are going to go have sex in your bed before we finish you off. I hope your wife doesn't mind". She knows he obviously won't believe it, but she can't help wanting to scare him.
"An accomplice, eh?" The man's hand appears to pull at Delphine's arm. She looks back at Cosima with a smirk but doesn't let the man pull her far.
"Yeah," Cosima finally announces her presence, holding Delphine's gaze with every word. "Just a hired gun. For a discount, I could help you get your revenge on this dangerous woman…this murderer".
The man chuckles, never lifting his body to see the stranger in his house. He sounds tired. Delphine glances back down at him, a repulsed sneer taking over her face. "That'll be hard to do when you're dead," she walks away from the couch, letting her arm thread through his grip until he no longer has it and his limp wrist falls back into place. He chuckles lazily.
The blonde approaches Cosima, her neutral expression giving nothing away. She grabs the brunette's hand and pulls her to the stairs. "I, uh," Cosima looks back to the living room once before following up the steps, only now noticing the empty beer cans on the floor by their coffee table. "I get the feeling you guys do role play a lot". Delphine doesn't answer, just snickers at the comment. "Or should I actually be worried for your husband's safety?"
"How about…" Delphine lets Cosima catch up to her before opening the double doors to her bedroom. "…you stop thinking about my husband".
"Holy fuck," Cosima's jaw drops at the sight of the grand bedroom. "Are we seriously about to have sex, steal millions of dollars' worth of diamonds, and then kill that poor man?"
Delphine rolls her eyes and turns to face her after leaving her small clutch in what looks like a large walk-in closet. "No," she scoffs, to Cosima's relief. "Murder takes much more time to plan," she adds, enjoying Cosima's confused and somewhat terrified expression. "And I wouldn't have sex with you in my husband's bed. I have a little more class than that".
She winks and Cosima isn't sure what to think. Squinting her eyes, she tries to extract the woman's motive, but the blonde just raises her eyebrow as she's examined. She thinks about the only thing that's shaken Delphine so far, the physical contact. She has expressed no real boundaries. She doesn't back away from anything – aside from having sex in her husband's bed. But now Cosima feels the urge to push that one boundary she has set. As though it's a challenge she can either face or back down from. She knows she shouldn't push it, she shouldn't want to push it, but the feeling is still there.
"Do me a favor, Delphine," she crosses her arms and glares at the woman only a few feet from her. "Next time you're having sex with the guy down there," she pauses, observing the smile growing on the blonde's face. "Think of me". It's the closest she'll get to meeting her challenge right now.
Delphine doesn't seem surprised at the forwardness. She looks pleased, in fact, the pink of her bottom lip turning white with the pressure from her teeth. "Think of you?" she confirms. Cosima nods.
There's a long moment of tense silence between the two before Delphine walks toward Cosima, deliberately dragging her eyes over every intimate part of Cosima's body. But just when Cosima thinks she's going to have her way, Delphine steps to the side of her, trailing her fingertips from one side of Cosima's waist, across her stomach, and stopping at the other side to gently turn her back toward the door. "Let's go".
"Uh," Cosima stutters, lightheaded from the contact. "Go where?"
Delphine is already leaving the room. Cosima waits a moment, staring at the king bed covered in deep red linen. She can't help imagining what she asked the blonde to do, even if she isn't the subject.
After Delphine points out areas of the house in a poor attempt at a tour, they return downstairs, loud snoring coming from the living room, and get back in Delphine's car.
…
…
…
"Turn here," Cosima points to the next street. "Then it's just that building on the right".
Delphine nods and pulls up in front of the apartment complex. "It doesn't look, ehm, like shade".
Cosima giggles at the Frenchwoman's attempt to repeat her earlier description. "Shady," she corrects. The blonde echoes the word until it feels right in her mouth. "Anyways, thanks for giving me a ride home, I could've taken a cab".
Delphine nods again without looking up. She unbuckles and gets out of the car. "What?" she asks when she catches Cosima giving her a curious look.
"You want to come up?"
"Of course," the car beeps as she locks it. "I showed you mine. Now show me yours," she orders with that ambiguous smile of hers.
They ride the squealing elevator in silence, Cosima staring at her the whole way up and Delphine ignoring her.
"God, you are so fucking strange," Cosima shakes her head and stops at her door to unlock it.
"Yet you're still letting me in your apartment," she follows Cosima inside. "You must be one of those…those people who do dangerous things for the fun of it. What are they called?"
Cosima giggles, making Delphine's lips pull up into a restrained grin. "Like an adrenaline-junkie? I think that's you".
Delphine looks around the small apartment. Cosima was right – it's not much bigger than her kitchen. The walls are dark, along with all the furniture. Nothing matches, but it somehow all comes together perfectly. She likes it, she feels comfortable. "Hm," she finally turns full circle and sees Cosima watching her with a raised eyebrow and crossed arms. Delphine leans back against the nearest wall and crosses her arms back at her. "Adrenaline-junkie. Why is that me?"
"I mean, for starters, I don't have a lavish life with loads of things to lose like you do, so there's a much higher chance of me murdering you…And then the more realistic reason…you're alone in my apartment with me at night…evening-ish," she cocks her head like it was supposed to be obvious. Delphine just shrugs with disregard, not convinced. "You do know that I'm…attracted to women, right?"
One side of Delphine's grin grows. "Is that so?"
"I guess I never outright said that, but, uh, I thought it was pretty clear".
"I'm not worried," she shrugs again.
"You have that level of trust in a stranger?" Cosima starts to saunter in her direction at a leisurely pace.
"Oh, it's not that I trust your morality," Delphine clarifies, waiting until Cosima is just a foot away to continue. "I just know you don't have the…what is it…balls? You don't have the balls to do anything I may not like".
There's a twinkle in the stranger's eye, on a mission to prove that she has the balls to do whatever the hell she wants. She takes another step toward Delphine, who's still leaning against the wall, smirking. "What about now?" Cosima asks, slipping her hand up around the side of Delphine's neck and jaw.
"Oh, Cosima," she sighs, staring at the woman's lips. "That proves nothing. I can do that," Delphine returns the action, holding the opposite side of Cosima's neck. "You, my dear, are all talk".
The fire that Cosima feels growing inside her, she can't confidently identify. It could be lust, the thrill of the challenge, anger at Delphine's assumptions – all things that would push her over the edge and to the blonde's lips, but she can only seem to stare. And the longer she hesitates, the larger the smile grows on Delphine's face.
"Well, you're not really my type anyway," she excuses herself lamely.
"Ah," Delphine nods, running her thumb over Cosima's bottom lip. "C'est dommage. I've enjoyed spending my Friday evenings with you".
"Wait, I didn't say–"
"I have to get home now," Delphine interrupts, sliding her hand down to Cosima's collarbones and pushing her away gently. "Goodbye, Cosima," she kisses her cheek softly and leaves before Cosima can conjure up anything to say.
With William still asleep on the couch, Delphine decides to take a hot bath when she gets home. She's never felt so frustrated after seeing Cosima. The harmless flirting never bothered her, and the seductive touching never made her feel guilty. It was all fun, entertaining, liberating. But once she was inside the apartment, she expected more and Cosima didn't give it to her.
Maybe she's just being a selfish child who's not used to not getting their way. She has to question herself, though – why did she want any of that anyway? She may not have many romantic feelings for Will, but she's not gay. She liked the fact that Cosima sought her out, that she put effort into her, that she noticed Delphine there every week watching her. But her attention was all she ever went there for. Why does she want Cosima's attention?
When she finishes her very un-relaxing bath, she finds Will changing in the bedroom.
"You're upright," she comments.
"Yeah, I think I slept most of it off. I've got to stop drinking so much on the weekends," he mumbles, throwing his shirt and pants somewhere in the vicinity of their laundry hamper and sits on the edge of the bed. "At least tomorrow's Sunday".
She stares at her husband, still holding one of their fluffy white towels around her body. He's not a trim bodybuilder, but he's not in awful shape either, especially for his age. Looking him over for a moment more, Delphine decides to take her frustrations out on him.
William is surprised when she straddles him on the bed, but he quickly takes the hint. She kisses him aggressively and tries not to imagine softer lips. She runs her fingers through his short blonde hair and tries not to imagine long brunette locks. She pushes him back and runs her hands over his chest and stomach, trying not to imagine a hairless terrain. She tells herself that Will is good enough, that she's happy enough with his company, his body.
Only now does she find Cosima's earlier request ironic. Tonight's the first time in months that she'll be trying to not think of her. Tonight's the first time in months that she'll be putting effort into pushing the image of Cosima out of her head instead of conjuring it.