CHAPTER TWELVE
Walter kept his breathing steady and his eyes focused on the white board at the front of the room. So far, so good. It helped he and Paige were one of the last couples to arrive, ending up at a table in the back. They shared it with another man and woman who had shown up even later.
He was grateful he wasn't sitting next to the female half of the pair. Although not too grateful. The male half smelled like a brewery and had no concept of personal space.
"Hey, did you see this" the man said, nudging Walter in the ribs. He was pointing at something on the syllabus they'd been handed as they'd entered the class. Walter picked up his copy and scanned through its contents.
"Sex During the Third Trimester. What a joke. Amma right, buddy?" The man elbowed him again.
"Uh." Walter wasn't sure how to answer. He and Paige were still intimate several times a week. Were they not supposed to be? Particularly since she'd been having contractions for at least a month, ones he didn't know she'd been having until recently.
"Not that I got much during the second trimester," the man continued. "Plus she's fatter than a pig now anyway. Oink, oink." The man laughed crudely.
Walter snuck a quick peek at the woman beside his obnoxious companion. She didn't seem all that plump, just tired and sad. Paige's belly was a bit larger and just the thought of her pregnant body made him shift in his seat. Oh, crap. Maybe he was a pervert.
A woman in scrubs decorated with teddy bears bounced into the room, interrupting his lascivious thoughts. "Hello, everyone, I'm Christina, I'll be your instructor," she announced before launching into an overview of the class. "Okay," she said, "let's go around the room and introduce yourselves, whether or not this is your first child, and due dates." Pointing to a table far to Walter's right, she added, "Let's start with you two."
He noticed, as the others talked about themselves, most of the couples were either married or engaged. When it was finally their turn, Paige glanced at him fleetingly as she squeezed his hand.
"Hi, I'm Paige Dineen," she announced, "and this is Walter, Walter O'Brien. He's. . .He's the father." She rubbed her free hand on her stomach. "I'm. . .I'm due October 20th. This is my second child and his first."
He caught a glimpse of something in her eyes before they darted away from his. Was she upset? Her voice had taken on a tone he recognized when something was bothering her. Had she wanted him to introduce them? He would have, if she had said something.
"Hey." Walter rolled his eyes as the man, who had introduced himself as Donnie, poked him in the side again. "Your first one, huh?" Walter nodded. "This is my third. Got two other brats with my ex." Evidently Donnie wasn't finished with his questioning because he prodded Walter once again. "So you two aren't married?"
"No," he replied through gritted teeth.
"Smart man," the guy bobbed his head. "Child support's a pain in the ass, but it's better than paying alimony to a blood sucking bitch."
Walter was appalled by the other man's attitude toward women. He wasn't surprised Donnie was divorced, only that two different females had seemingly voluntarily procreated with him. It was mind-boggling.
Fortunately the introductions had come to an end and the instructor began talking about birthing plans. Walter quickly grew bored as the material she was going over were subjects he'd already studied. Closing his eyes, he recalled the story Paige had told him about the time she and Ralph had been evicted. How she'd spent her last two dollars on an ice cream cone for Ralph while she begged for a job.
He'd thought either her parents had disowned her for having a child out-of-wedlock (he remembered his parents talking in hushed tones about such things when he was young) or they were deceased. Both those conclusions were apparently erroneous. Paige had evidently severed ties with her mother around the time Drew had abandoned them. And she obviously didn't trust Veronica. He wondered why.
He didn't have long to dwell on it as he was disturbed yet again. "Hey, your baby momma gonna breast-feed?" the other man asked. Walter had no idea, it wasn't something they'd discussed. He wasn't given a chance to answer as Donnie added, "Don't let her. Makes the titties off limits, if you know what I mean."
Unconsciously, Walter scooted his chair a little closer to Paige's. She glanced over at him, giving him scolding look tempered with a smile. "Pay attention," she mouthed at him.
Relief filled him two hours later as he and Paige walked out to their vehicle. Donnie had been obnoxious throughout the entire class, making disgusting comments and constantly jabbing at him.
"So I see you made a new friend," Paige said as he opened the car door for her.
"Hardly." He waited as she made herself comfortable.
She smiled up at him. "I heard a couple of the things he said. I'm proud of you for not giving him the tongue lashing he clearly deserved. But I kinda wish you would have. He's a real jerk. Oh. . ." She placed her hand on her stomach as she let out a squeak.
"Are you having contractions?" he asked worriedly.
"No." She reached for his hand and set it next to hers. "He's just kicking really hard."
Walter calmed down as he felt their son's foot kick his palm. "We still haven't picked out a name," he pointed out. "We can't keep calling him "he".
"I know." She blew out a blast of air. "Nothing seems right, though."
His mouth curled as he had an mischievous idea, a name she'd never go for. . . "You named Ralph after your father, right?"
"Yeees," she replied warily.
"So I guess naming the baby Ronnie after your mom is out of the question?" He had to press his lips shut to keep from laughing.
"That's not even funny," she said before shutting the car door in his face.
ooooo
Paige's grouchiness lasted even after they'd arrived back at the condo. Ralph had called, asking permission to stay the night at the garage with his grandmother. Walter could tell she wasn't happy about saying yes. He'd listened as she'd reeled off a long list of instructions before finally hanging up.
"Ugh, I don't like this," she said as she put her sweater away in the closet. "I don't trust her."
"He'll be okay." Walter didn't think Veronica would hurt her own grandson, not physically anyway. It was obvious, even to him, her mother had hurt Paige emotionally when she was younger. And despite his EQ being underdeveloped, he believed the older woman was trying to make amends with her daughter, if Paige would only let her.
"I hope so," she replied as she idly moved hangers along the rod. "Hey." She pulled out something and thrust it toward him. "When we bought this, you promised me you had a few ideas where I could wear it. So far it's just been gathering dust."
Walter had to suck in his breath as she draped the slinky red maternity dress over her belly as his reaction was instant and intense. He'd taken off his shirt and kicked off his shoes as they'd readied for bed. He was ready for bed, all right, just not in the literal sense anymore.
A moan escaped his throat as she stroked the fabric over her stomach. "Are you okay?" she asked, obviously oblivious to his predicament.
"Yes." The single word came out strangled and hoarse and the little blood still left in his brain shot straight down to his groin.
That caught her attention. She pressed her lips together in a vain attempt to hide her smile. "Oh, I don't know," she said, holding the dress tighter against her body. "You seem a little. . .tense." Darting a glance downward, she added, "A little. . .stiff."
"W-We. . .we can. . .w-we can't. . ." She'd been having contractions. They couldn't. . . They shouldn't. . .
Paige moved closer, close enough the heat from her body caused him to break out into a sweat. "It's all right, Walter," she said. "I need less stress, not less sex." She placed her hands on his t-shirt then slid them upward and into his hair. "It helps me relax."
He groaned again as she pressed herself against him. The dress slithered toward the floor. "If y-you're s-sure," he said as her lips grew nearer.
"Very sure." Her words whispered across his skin just before she kissed him.
ooooo
"Hey," Paige said later as they spooned naked under the sheets.
"Hmm. . ." She could tell Walter was almost asleep. Poor guy, he had to be exhausted. She'd missed him the night before when he'd been in jail. And he most definitely had missed her, if his enthusiastic love-making was anything to go by. The things he'd done with his tongue. . .
"Do you. . . Do you think I taste, uh, 'funny'?" she asked. "You know, down there?"
"What? No." His head popped up over her shoulder. "Why would you ask that?"
"Because I'm pregnant."
"Yeah, I kinda noticed that." Walter placed his hand on her stomach and began caressing little circles with his fingers.
"No, when I was pregnant before. . . With Ralph. . . Um. . ." Probably not a good time to bring up her ex but. . . "Well, I was told I tasted 'different' after I. . . I got. . ."
She watched as his mouth twisted into a frown, no doubt figuring out exactly who had told her that. He kissed her neck, nuzzling it a little before replying.
"I love how you taste." He kissed her shoulder. "But then I don't have anything else to compare it to."
She closed her eyes as the stupid niggling little voice in the back of her head starting filling her mind with ugly notions. Reminding her she was his first. . . That it was only a matter of time before he'd grow bored with her. . . That he would want to be with other women to satisfy his scientific curiosity. . . That she'd never be smart enough to keep his attention . . . That he'd abandon her like every other man in her life. . .
". . .never done it when you weren't pregnant," Walter had continued on, unaware of her inner turmoil.
She rolled her head to the side so she could look at him. "Yes, you did," she countered a bit testily. "That time in your loft when you lured me upstairs with cheeseca. . ." Oh, crap. "I was pregnant then, wasn't I?"
"Yes." He smiled smugly at her. "You just didn't know it yet."
"Ooo, you think you're so smart," she said, turning over to face him.
"Well I am a genius," he stated, wrapping his arms around her.
"Well, genius this." Sliding her hands from his hips to just underneath his arms, she began tickling him.
ooooo
"Mail call!"
Toby strolled into the garage the next morning, carrying a stack of envelopes and magazines. He stopped in front of Paige's desk as he sorted through it.
"Bill. Bill. Bill," he said as Walter watched him deposited each letter on her desk. "Ooo, one for Sly," the shrink announced as he held up a copy of a gaming magazine before he continued on. "Bill. Junk. Junk. Bill. Catalog. Postcard for Walter. . ."
Taking the card from Toby, Walter turned it over, catching a faint lemony scent. Probably some advertising campaign for some new type of dish soap. Shrugging, he tossed it into his inbox.
"And last but not least, another bill," said Toby as he placed the last envelope on Paige's desk with a flourish.
"Thanks," Paige said with a slightly sarcastic edge to her voice. "I'm gonna need another cup of coffee."
"I thought you were limiting yourself to one a day?" asked the psychiatrist, hitching his hip onto the edge of her workstation.
"I am." She got to her feet. "Just because I need one doesn't mean I'm going to drink one. Now go away."
"Yes, ma'am." The shrink hopped off her desk
Walter watched as Paige waddled off toward the kitchen, heat swamping him as desire sizzled through him. He squirmed uncomfortably in his chair, unable to look away.
"Admiring your handiwork, 197? Although I don't think it was your hands that got her in that condition."
His face burning even hotter, Walter jerked his head around to glare at Toby, embarrassed he'd been caught lusting after his pregnant girlfriend. "Shut up."
"Nice comeback, Big Brain," said the shrink. "What's the matter? All the blood rush down to the little brain?"
"Dammit, Toby."
"Hey, there's nothing wrong with it." The doc came over and sat his butt on the corner of Walter's desk.
"It's not. . .uh, well. . .not perverted, is it?" Walter asked uneasily, not wanting to be thought a sick freak.
"No, it's a pretty typical response, primitive male pride, impregnating your female and all that," said Toby. "What I don't understand is how you can be so calm about the impeding birth of your child."
Walter shrugged. "Paige has done this before, and I've been to all her appointments and. . ." He took a deep breath. "And I'm scared to death." Narrowing his eyes, he added, "Why do you want to know? I know you told her not to say anything about the contractions. . ."
"Hey, it was good advice at the time." The psychiatrist leapt to his feet, a sheepish expression on his face. "You were distressed enough by your little space adventure. Knowing she was experience false labor may have sent you over the edge." He darted a quick glance toward the mechanic's work area and lowered his voice. "I think Happy's pregnant. All the signs and symptoms are there."
"She hasn't said anything?" Walter was surprised, but pleased for his friends.
"I don't think she's realized it yet," said Toby with a grin. "I've already been planning to propose. I don't want her to think I'm offering marriage just because she's having a baby though. So I'm going to ask her before she figures it out."
Oh, boy. "That might not be a good idea."
"Why not? Just because you don't believe in the institution of marriage doesn't mean the rest of us have to eschew it." The doc looked over both his shoulders. "I've already commissioned an engagement ring. It should be finished by next week."
All the air seemed to be sucked out of the room and Walter started hyperventilating. Oh, no, no, no. . .
"What's wrong with you?" asked the shrink, staring at him suspiciously.
Cabe chose that moment to stroll into the garage. "Gather round, got a case. It's an easy one this time."
"That's what you said last time," complained Sylvester as he got up out of his chair.
Walter hung back as the others crowded around the Homeland agent. Luck didn't exist in his opinion. But Cabe's arrival couldn't have been timelier, saving him from answering a question he didn't want to answer.