Stop Please
"Please...please, stop!" The scream made Penny flinch, her whole body recoiling, and she froze, hands shaking as she held them the gash on Pepper's thigh. It was deep...deep enough that she could see the white of bone underneath, and she felt her stomach flip. Taking a deep breath, Penny tried to stop her lip from trembling...tried to still her shaking, blood covered hands. There was so much blood. She tried to remember if she'd ever seen so much blood, and immediately her uncle came to mind.
"Sorry, sorry...just...just give me a second," Pepper whispered, and Penny nodded, fighting the urge to wipe her eyes with blood-covered hands.
"I'm sorry," Penny whispered, a tear dripping down her cheek. "Sorry…"
The woman's face, drawn and pale with pain, softened, and she reached out to touch Penny's hand with her own bloody one. "It's not your fault."
Penny glanced at the gash again, stomach rebelling, and then over at the bottle of dark colored alcohol she'd found amongst the rubble of the lakehouse. It had been a gift, according to Mr. Stark. Unopened and very old. She was sure he wouldn't mind her using it for first aid purposes. The man never drank anymore, so it would have just sat, unopened and unused. Now it would be useful. And if he was upset for some reason, she'd find a way to replace it. Penny shook her head, forcing herself to stop justifying it. She was in shock, she knew. Her ears rang and her stomach felt strange and sick and she was so dizzy...but this had to be done.
It was just lucky that it had landed near her.
He and Morgan hadn't been at the lakehouse that morning. They'd left the night before, taking a special father-daughter trip into the city to go see Rhodey and his mom, leaving Penny and Pepper at the lakehouse alone. She'd come to the lakehouse at the beginning of the week, and she and Mr. Stark had spent the majority of the last five days in his lab, or out on the lake with Morgan, but he'd had this trip planned, and Penny had wanted him to get to spend some one-on-one time with Morgan, his real daughter. It was something she hadn't said out loud. And it wasn't like Morgan resented her or anything. Quite the opposite. Morgan called her her big sister and wanted Penny to read her bedtime stories and play hide and seek and take her swimming. She wanted to watch movies together and sing Disney songs and eat the foods that Penny liked and she said all the time that she was going to be just like Penny when she grew up.
May and Happy were on a cruise. And that was great. Penny was just glad her aunt was happy. If anyone deserved to be happy, it was May. And it had been so nice of Pepper and Mr. Stark to invite her to stay at the lakehouse for two weeks. But, as she reminded herself every single day, this wasn't her family. It felt like when she'd first gone to live with May and Ben. Yes, they loved her, and yes, they took care of her. But they weren't her parents.
It was the same now.
So she'd insisted she stay at the lakehouse when Mr. Stark had offered to have her come along, telling him to have fun with Morgan, and claiming that she and Pepper would have fun. And Pepper had seemed excited. She'd told Penny that they would have a girl's day.
And then, at 10:21am, while standing in the kitchen with Pepper, the two of them making waffles, Penny's spider-senses had gone off.
She'd only had time to look around before the explosion had thrown her backwards, whiting out her vision and knocking her out cold. When she'd woken, however long later, the first thing she'd done was find Pepper, crawling through the rubble and trying to stop the bleeding, giving no thought to the blood on her own clothes. That didn't matter. This was Pepper. She would do anything to save her.
"I have to disinfect it," Penny whispered, looking around at the rubble that surrounded them on this beautiful, otherwise calm summer morning. She hoped that Mr. Stark was on his way. Hoped he would be there soon with help. But she had hit her head and her stomach ached but Pepper had to come first. So she held the bottle of whiskey above Pepper's leg, waiting for the woman to drop her head back against the ground, teeth gritted. Ready. And then Penny dumped the bottle onto her leg, tears running down her face as Pepper writhed and screamed, her hands in fists at her sides. But then it was done.
"Okay...it's done. It's done!"
Pepper's scream cut off with a sob, and she nodded, lips trembling. It wasn't done though. Penny had to sew it up somehow. But she didn't have a needle! The lakehouse was in pieces around her...how was she ever supposed to find a sewing kit? So instead she ripped the bottom half of her shirt off, soaked it with more bourbon, then pressed it to the cut. Ignoring Pepper's screams, she tied it as tight as she dared around the gash, then looked around again, hoping against hope that her phone had somehow landed nearby.
But of course there was no phone. They were in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by shards of glass and splinters of wood and burning furniture, and they needed to move. So Penny scooped the woman up, forcing herself to her feet and stumbling towards the direction of the lake, or the direction she hoped the lake was in. It was all smoke and dust and beautiful clear skies and the strange, unnatural silence after a disaster, just like the Compound after the battle with Thaons. When Mr. Stark had knelt at Steve's side and Bucky had dropped to his knees at the man's other side. When Pepper had held her husband and Rhodey had stood behind him, a hand on his shoulder, and Peter Quill, a man she barely knew, had put a hand on her shoulder, leading her a few feet away until her knees had buckled and she'd sat down hard on the ground.
She'd felt the same then. Numb and dizzy and confused. And Quill had knelt in front of her, asking if she was okay. Asking if she was hurt. She'd just stared at him, the world spinning too quickly around her, until Mr. Stark had come, kneeling beside her and wrapping her in his arms, then, somehow, she'd been in a hospital room where a dazed looking nurse had diagnosed her with a concussion and shock and a blanket had been wrapped around her shoulders.
Now there was no one to lead her away from the wreckage. No one to guide her to the hospital, or wrap a blanket around her shoulders. But, she reminded herself, that didn't matter. Something had happened to Pepper while she'd been there...she should have known. Should have sensed whatever terrible thing had caused this sooner. Should have prevented it.
Would Mr. Stark send her home now? Would he take one look at his injured, sobbing wife and send her packing? She wouldn't blame him if he did. And if she had to spend the rest of her summer vacation in her apartment, alone, while Pepper recovered and Mr. Stark resented her and May and Happy continued to grow into the family that they deserved, then Penny would bear it. Because, honestly, what else did she expect?
She made it to the shore of the lake before her legs gave out, and she did her best to protect Pepper when she fell, placing the woman gently onto the grass and pressing a hand to the ground to keep herself from collapsing. "Penny? Honey, we have to call for help." Pepper's words came to her from far away, as though she were drifting through the lake...as though she were under water. "Is there anyone around? Do you know who did this? Do you see anyone?"
Penny tasted blood and her elbow bent, her arm no longer strong enough to support her. Rolling over on her back, she stared up at the bright blue sky, only partially obscured by smoke. She would miss the lakehouse. Would miss Pepper and Mr. Stark. And she would miss May...no, she did. "I miss May," she murmured, blinking up at the clouds.
"What? Penny? Penny!" The scream jolted her from her thoughts and she looked up to find Pepper kneeling over her, eyes wide and horrified. "Oh god...Penny…" Hands pressed to her stomach and she didn't understand why. "No...no, honey, stay awake!"
"I'm sorry...I didn't...I didn't know. I should have stopped it," she slurred, voice trailing off. It didn't hurt...nothing hurt. She was numb and cold and even the pressure on her stomach barely registered. "Pepper?"
"I'm right here. Hold on...Tony's on his way. He'll be here soon. Friday would have sent the distress signal."
Tony. Mr. Stark. "He...he's mad?"
"No. No, baby, he's not mad. You're okay. Look at me, Penny!"
She tried. She tried to make eye contact, even when her eyes grew heavier with every blink. "Sorry…"
She heard it then, the distant sound of footsteps mixing with the sound of repulsors. Two sets. And shooting. Pepper was in danger. Still in danger. She grabbed the woman's arm, tugging her down to the ground beside her just as bullets whizzed past them overhead and two suits flew into sight. "Stay...stay down. They...they're…" Penny couldn't finish that sentence. All she could do was stare at the blue sky until the sounds of gunshots halted abruptly, and the sound of repulsors grew closer and closer.
"Pepper? Are you…"
"I'm fine! Help Penny!"
"I've got her! Get Pepper out of here!" That was Rhodey. She knew Rhodey. But she couldn't see him. That's when she realized that her eyes had closed, but she couldn't reopen them...and, she thought, it didn't matter. She needed to sleep. Maybe after she slept, it would all make sense.
"She's hurt!"
"I know! But I've got her! We don't know how many more of those men are around here." Arms scooped her up, and she thought maybe it should have hurt, but Mr. Stark was yelling and she felt her head swimming and then she drifted away, her head dropping onto the metal shoulder of a suit.
And then she jerked awake.
Penny's eyes flew open, gasping for air as she came to, looking around the hospital room, instinctively searching for Pepper. Had they been found? Was Pepper hurt? "Pepper?" she called, trying and failing to sit up. It wasn't so much that it hurt...it did, but that wasn't really the problem. The problem was her head, spinning strangely, and the fact that her arms refused to hold her weight. "Pepper?"
She was in a hospital. Why was she in a hospital? She couldn't remember. All she remembered was the lakehouse. The explosion. Pepper. Before she could try to figure it out, the door swung open, and Pepper entered the room in a wheelchair, Mr. Stark pushing her, but both froze when they made eye contact. "Penny?" Pepper asked, voice faint.
"Are you okay?" Penny demanded, trying again to sit up and finding herself once more betrayed by her arms, which refused to hold her.
"I'm fine," Pepper assured her as Mr. Stark pushed her close enough that she could sit right at Penny's side. The older woman reached out, gripping Penny's hand. "What about you? How do you feel?"
"I…" Penny shook her head, waving that thought away. "I'm fine. What happened?"
"They were after me," Mr. Stark put in, moving to sit on the other side of her bed. "We managed to apprehend five men. We think that was everyone, but we can't be sure. For the moment, we're staying in the tower."
"Is Morgan okay?"
"She's fine," Pepper reassured her, squeezing her hand. "She's worried about you, but she's upstairs with Rhodey. Sam and Bucky are here too."
Penny nodded, trying to comprehend that as Mr. Stark brushed some of her hair back, forehead crinkled in concern. "There was a piece of shrapnel in your stomach. You've been in and out for a few days. May and Happy are upstairs too."
"They didn't have to cancel their cruise," Penny argued, shaking her head, and the man's eyes widened for a moment.
"Penny...honey, you had to have surgery. They were worried."
Feeling a hot rush of shame that started in her stomach and seemed to engulf her, Penny nodded, dropping her eyes.
"Hey, look at me, Underoos." The nickname was spoken softly, but it still surprised her. It was one she hadn't heard in a long time. So she looked up at him, Pepper still gripping her hand, and the words rushed out before she could stop them.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry...I should have known. I should have stopped them!" Tears filled her eyes and refused to stay there but still, she kept talking, ignoring his apparent confusion. "I tried to get her somewhere safe. I'm so sorry."
"Penny," Pepper murmured, voice soft and almost reproaching. "Honey, you couldn't have known that was going to happen."
"I should have," Penny argued through tear-filled eyes, but it was Mr. Stark who shook his head, voice firm when he spoke.
"No, you should not have. You weren't staying with us as Spider-Girl. I didn't expect you to stand guard and keep an eye out for people trying to kill me. You're like our kid, Pen. And although it's pretty amazing that you were able to get Pepper out of there, and I don't think we can ever express to you how grateful we are that you protected her, we're still worried about you." He shifted beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and sitting back against the pillows on the reclining surface of the hospital bed.
And, with Pepper gripping her hand and Mr. Stark holding her, she lay her head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat and trying to stop her tears. She didn't know how to explain that she was afraid they wouldn't want her around anymore if she messed up...that she was afraid that her place in their life was a fragile one. But Mr. Stark seemed to understand anyway, because his next words were steady. Sure.
"We love you so much, Pen. I don't know what we'd do if something were to happen to you."
Pepper moved from her wheelchair, standing on shaky legs before sitting on Penny's other side and grabbing the blankets that had pooled around her waist, pulling them up and covering Penny, tucking her, then kissing her forehead. "You're family, honey. Don't ever forget that."
She would forget that, over and over during the next few years, but the people that loved her were always there to remind, again and again, until she didn't need the reminders anymore.