Summer, 1203 Monastery near 's-Hertogenbosch, Duchy of Brabant

Egbert finally found the missing young boy. The monk watched as the six-year-old advanced towards a nearby tree, a long stick grasped in his hand. With more enthusiasm than skill, the tree was attacked with the stick. "What are you doing, Nicholas?" Egbert asked once he was behind the child.

Startled, Nick quickly turned away from the tree and lowered his stick. "I'm a knight."

Egbert raised an eyebrow. "This was not your task for the day."

Nick looked around at the tall grasses and flowers. "I was practicing."

"This is not your purpose. Here, you are to serve God, and that does not require a weapon."

"What if this is-"

"No," the monk sharply interrupted while scowling down at the child. "If God wanted you for that task, you would have been first-born, not third." He waited until the boy looked back at him. "The Duke sent you here to learn and serve God."

"What if everyone needs protection?"

Egbert sighed and silently prayed for more patience when dealing with children. "Our Order does not shed blood, so has no use for weapons. So as long as you serve God and stay in His Grace, then He will protect you. We will all be protected." He waited while Nicholas looked around, then eventually dropped the stick and came over. Guiding the child, Egbert began their walk back to the monastery.

Summer, 1206 Monastery near 's-Hertogenbosch, Duchy of Brabant

Pieter ran while waving his arms above his head to catch the attention of the rider. Eventually, he was seen and stood while the horse trotted up to him and then stopped. "What are you doing, Nicholas?"

Nick sighed, then slid off the horse's back. "Adelaide wanted to run."

"Adelaide?" Pieter quizzically asked. "Who … you named the horse?"

"Why not?"

"Nicholas, that is an animal-"

"Animals can have names-"

"Given to the monastery for working," Pieter continued as if he had not been interrupted. "As all animals are – beasts subservient to man, to be used-"

"She wanted to go out."

"No, Nicholas," he corrected, "you wanted to go out. That horse is too old for this type of activity."

"Adelaide is not too old," Nick objected. The horse had dropped her head, and he reached over to pat her forehead. "She likes it."

"And now she will be too tired for any more work for the rest of the day." Pieter sighed, knowing how much the boy liked being outside; the child was curious and often tempted by the world. "Come," he encouraging said, "let us return to the monastery." He waited until Nicholas and the horse were moving before he started walking. "So, what were you doing today?"

Nick kicked at a tall weed that was bending in the breeze. "Protecting."

"Protecting us from what, this time?"

"Vampires."

"Vampires?"

"Yes," Nick exclaimed. "Roland was telling me about them."

"Roland?" Pieter thought for a moment. "He is part of that visiting performing troupe?"

Nick nodded his head. "Roland has the best stories. In one, there was this vampire, and the man had to defeat it."

"And how did the man do that?"

"First, he had to find it. That was easy – the vampire was this dripping, rotting body that smelled of death. And it was walking around like this," Nick explained as he slumped over and lurched around, groaning. He staggered around, finally stopping when he bumped into Adelaide. "And it couldn't speak because it was dead and only wanted to suck blood and destroy souls. That's why it had to be killed," he breathlessly finished.

"So this man found it and killed it?"

"Yes. And everyone was saved."

"That is good. You never want to lose your soul. That means you have nothing, and when you die, God will not know you, and you will exist nowhere." Pieter saw Nicholas was becoming worried, so he did not say anything more about death. It was going to be hard enough on the boy when he learned of the messenger that had arrived bearing the news of the death of his brother, Godfrey.

Fall, 1218 Monastery near 's-Hertogenbosch, Duchy of Brabant

"Nicolas, qu'est-ce que tu fais?" René asked as he quickly tried to catch the falling wooden chess pieces, sent into motion when the young man burst into his office. "What are you doing? What is the problem?"

Nick quizzically looked back, not realizing he had knocked into the chessboard, disturbing their game. He immediately knelt down to pick up the pieces that had fallen to the floor. "Forgive me, Brother. I didn't see-"

"It is alright, Nicolas," René reassuringly said while helping the man up. "It is only a game. We can start again later." The hurt look in Nicolas' eyes told him everything. "You have been told."

Nick held up the parchment he had been given. "When were you going to tell me?"

René lowered his head while going to sit in his chair. "It was not for me to tell you this."

"You are my mentor." Nick sat down in the dark wooden chair opposite of the older man. "You knew, and you didn't tell me?" He looked down at the message. "How long have you known?"

"It was not my place to tell you." He faltered under Nicolas' glare. "A week. Preparations had to be made."

"And the last of which was giving me this message?"

"When you were given it would make no difference in what you will have to do."

"Does it matter that I have taken my vows?"

René held his tongue. Nicolas began to take his vows later than was usual; he had always been more interested and drawn to the world and to the entertainer's fanciful stories. "Not your solemn vows, and no." He watched as the young man got up and paced within the confines of the chamber. "Your duty is to God, the King, and Family. God made your father the Duke, so you will do as he orders."

Nick slumped back into his chair. "How am I to do this? I am too old to now follow in my brother's footsteps. He is the Heir, not me."

"No," admonished René, "you do not have a brother."

"Henry-"

"No, Nicolas," René began as he leaned forward. "You must learn this – you never had such a brother. There was Godfrey, and then there is you."

Nick shook his head. "No."

"Nicolas, you read your message. Your … brother … was disgraced. He has been disowned; erased; gone. More than gone, he was never here - removed from the records in both the archives of your family and in the Church. Even in the records we keep stored here. It is done."

Nick looked back at the parchment, his arm beginning to shake. "What of his … soul? If he doesn't exist …"

René took a long breath. "He never existed, therefore he has no soul, so there will be nothing for him after death. His punishment - his banishment - covers this world and the next." He could see Nicolas was terrified. "This is nothing you will have to experience. So long as you listen to your tutors and to the Church, do as they say, this will not be your fate."

Nick shut his eyes, trying to calm himself. So much in his life had changed in a short period of time. He had lost another brother, along with the life that had been planned for him and the place where he lived. "I have to leave."

"Yes, you have been recalled to Leuven, where you will learn what you need to know from your family."

"I am too old to start training to become a knight." Nick looked around. "And to be a page at twenty-one years old? And I will have no one at the castle for company."

"You sister, Fleur, is still in residence. You may practice your page duties upon her."

"She is eight."

"Then she may practice her duties upon you." René indicated the parchment. "The Duke is leaving from the Crusades and retuning to teach you. You will only have to be at the castle for over a year, then you will go and serve and learn from Lord DeLabarre."

Nick recognized the name - the same family that took his brother Henry for training. He hoped his training and life turned out better. "I was to serve my family here, under God," he repeated the phrase he had been taught since youth, clinging to something while everything else was unraveling.

René stood and shuffled over to Nicolas, placing a hand upon the young man's shoulder. "And now you will serve your family elsewhere." He squeezed Nicolas reassuringly. "Wherever the Church is, God will be there, too." He paused. "I know this seems overwhelming, but I want you to remember this: Quand les temps sont sombres, suivez toujours la Croix."

Nick quickly glanced up before translating. "When times are dark, always follow the Cross."