Just a little something I came up with after watching the latest episode of Station 19.
Minute 15
Maya and Carina both carefully swabbed each other's noses before completing the testing procedures and setting the kits on Maya's desk.
"Alright," Maya said, grabbing her phone and setting a fifteen-minute timer, "I'm gonna go grab us some water. I'll be right back?"
Carina nodded, smiling at the blonde as she left.
Truthfully, Maya needed a little bit of space between her and her girlfriend because she was so happy with what had just happened that if she stayed with Carina, she was sure she would jump her. Maya walked out of her office, grabbing Vic as she walked up the stairs.
"What the hell Maya?" Vic said as they walked.
"I asked Carina to move in with me," Maya said as she pulled Vic into the beanery.
"You what?" Vic said, looking at her friend.
"I asked Carina to move in with me," Maya repeated, "And she said yes."
"Oh my gosh, Maya," Vic said, eyes wide, "That's a really big step."
"I know," Maya said, nodding as she grabbed two bottles of water out of the fridge, "But I can't keep living without her and this is the best way to remedy that. Going home alone every night after these hellish pandemic shifts has been rough."
"Yeah," Vic said, nodding, "I get it. If I didn't have Travis, I would be going crazy."
Minute 14
Carina sat in Maya's office, pulling out her phone. She texted Amelia, needing to tell someone what had just happened. As soon as she shot off the text, her phone rang.
"You are doing what?" the neurosurgeon said without even saying hello.
"Hello Amelia," Carina said. "Yeah, hi Carina," Amelia said, "You are moving in with Maya?"
"Si," Carina said, nodding as a smile broke out on her face.
"Are you sure that's wise?" Amelia asked, picking up Scout who was fussing.
"Well, both of us are miserable being apart," Carina said, "And moving in together is the only way to deal with that during this pandemic. We have worked on a lot of our issues. And both of us came to this conclusion on our own. I know it's probably not what I would normally do at this point in a relationship, but nothing is normal right now, and living with Maya, that will be some stable thing in my life."
"Stable?" Amelia questioned, "Not sure stable is a word I would use to describe your girlfriend."
"Amelia," Carina warned, "She has been working hard, even despite the pandemic, to show me that she is committed to us, all in."
"So she does some work for three weeks and you're willing to move in when she asked?" Amelia said, not really judging, just more concerned about her friend.
"Well, actually, we both asked each other to move in," Carina said, "I came here to ask her and before I could, she asked me."
Minute 13
"Wait, if you just asked her to move in, what are you doing up here?" Vic asked.
"Well, Carina brought rapid tests for us to take, just to make sure," Maya said, starting to pace, "And we have to wait fifteen minutes before we have the results so I offered to get us some water. I don't know. If I'm alone with her right now, I'm worried I'm going to cross all the lines before we know if it's safe to do so."
"So I'm just your cold shower?" Vic asked, raising an eyebrow at Maya.
"What?" Maya said, looking at her, "No. I just needed someone to tell, and you're probably my closest friend in the station, except maybe Andy, but she not here anyways and…"
"Maya," Vic said, cutting her off, "Hey, it's fine. I'm glad you told me. I'm happy for you, both of you. You're girlfriend is amazing, and I'm glad you got your head on straight and realized that."
"Nothing straight about this head," Maya said, cracking a smile at Vic.
"Oh shut up," Vic said, shaking her head, "You know what I mean. I'm glad you're happy, Maya. You deserve a chance to be happy."
Minute 12
"Am I moving too fast?" Carina asked quietly, suddenly feeling very unsure of herself even though a minute earlier, she had never been more sure of anything in her life.
"Do you feel like you can trust her?" Amelia asked, knowing that was the big issue in her friend's relationship with the fire captain.
"Si," Carina said after a second, "I think I can. And being alone is so exhausting. And knowing that Maya is out there and I'm not with her makes me ache."
"I think you are making the right choice," Amelia sad, "This pandemic sucks. If you can do something to make it a little less sucky for you, you should."
"Thank you, Amelia," Carina said, taking a deep breath.
"Any time," Amelia said, shrugging, "I enjoy getting to hear about what people are doing who aren't quarantining in a house with four children, one of whom is a newborn and three of whose mother is in the hospital and may not come home for a long time…if ever."
"Hey," Carina said, hearing the sadness in Amelia's voice, "She has the best team working on her. And from what I have heard and know about Meredith, she does not give up easily."
"I know," Amelia said, wiping a tear out of her eye, "It's just so hard. Ellis cries for her every night, and Zola is old enough to know what's going on and she is terrified. They already lost their dad. They can't…"
"And they won't," Carina said, not wanting to hear the end of the sentence.
"I hope not," Amelia said, trying not to start crying, "Hey, I need to go. It's almost time for Scout's feed."
"I'll let you get back to the baby," Carina said, "And good luck with the kids."
"Congratulations again," Amelia said, "And just know you can always call me if you need me."
"Grazie," Carina said, handing up, "And same goes for you."
Minute 11
"You should go back down to Carina," Vic said as Maya continued pacing.
"I don't know if I can control myself," Maya said, not looking at Vic.
"Oh, come on," Vic said, "You are Maya freaking Bishop. You have more self-control than anyone I have ever met. When you don't want to do something, there is no changing your mind. So just tell yourself that you have to wait and do it, but if you just leave her in your office alone for fifteen minutes, you might not be moving in with her."
Maya's eyes got wide as she looked at Vic.
"I'm kidding," Vic said, realizing there was some level of insecurity in Maya that the blonde was trying very hard not to give into, "But you should go down there. Come on. You can do this. All you have to do is wait, what, ten minutes, and then you get to have your way with Carina."
"I can do this," Maya said, nodding as she went to the counter, grabbing the waters she had set down. The two of them walked down the stairs together.
"They got the tiger," Warren called as they all were crowded around the window.
"Good," Maya said, walking over and looking into the barn, still not able to believe there was a tiger in her fire station.
Minute 10
Carina looked around the office, sighing a little. This was the first time she had been in Maya's office since the night of the spaghetti dinner. That felt like a lifetime ago. Before the cheating, before the admission of love, before the pandemic, before she had ever lost a mom. Being back here was a little weird, knowing that Maya and Jack had hooked up in the room just behind her less than a month ago.
The night after Maya had come and asked her for forgiveness, they had gone to the blonde's apartment and talked for hours. There were some tears, a little yelling, and a lot of holding each other. They were up until almost 4 am working through everything, Carina shocked and amazed that Maya sat there through all of it, never trying to run. The Italian felt her girlfriend twitch a few times, almost moving to get up, but staying put through the hard conversations they had to have. That was a big part of the reason Carina had decided to stay, because Maya showed her she was willing to stay, and then they had been hit with a pandemic less than 48 hours later which made everything so much more complicated.
It had almost been a blessing for their fragile relationship, forcing them to talk more and not just burying it all with sex. Maya had had time to start therapy and start working through her own issues while also working through things with Carina. They had gotten through more in the past three weeks than would be possible in three months pre-pandemic because when they weren't at work, neither of them had much to do besides talk with each other. They were breaking down walls with each other that neither of them ever thought they would take down for anyone because they had time to.
Minute 9
"What are you thinking about?" Maya asked, walking in and handing Carina a bottle of water before sitting down in a chair on the opposite side of the room.
"About how much I love you," Carina said, smiling, "And about how much has changed since we first said that."
"Yeah," Maya said, nodding as Carina took a sip of her water, "When I first said that, I never imagined that we would be moving in together a month later."
"Are you having regrets?" Carina asked, feeling weirdly insecure all of a sudden.
"No," Maya said, "No, not at all. No. The only thing I have been surer of in my life is that I love you. Why? Are you?"
"No," Carina said, biting her lip to keep in the dopey smile that Maya almost made appear on her face, "No. I am sure of this too. I don't want to spend another day apart from you."
Maya couldn't keep her own smile in, letting her happiness shine all over her face.
Minute 8
"What made you want to move in together?" Maya asked, knowing that earlier in the day, Carina had been against the mere idea of seeing each other for a few minutes.
"Ben," Carina said, seeing the confusion cross Maya's face, "He brought a patient in this morning just as I lost another mom…"
"Another one?" Maya said, feeling her heart break for her girlfriend, knowing that Carina really struggled when she lost patients.
"Si," Carina said, trying not to start crying again, "She skipped her visits because of COVID and came in too late. She was nineteen, and both she and her baby died alone because of pandemic protocols."
"Oh Babe," Maya said, wanting nothing more than to hug her girlfriend, to take away a little bit of the pain.
The first time Carina had lost a patient, she had called Maya in tears, not even able to speak. It had taken everything in the fire captain to stay in her office and not run to the hospital to hold her girlfriend.
The second on, Carina had just texted Maya, asking if they could talk later. When Maya had called, Carina was alone in her apartment, curled up in bed. Maya had talked to her for hours, reassuring her that she had done everything she could, that she wasn't a failure, and that one day, the pandemic would end.
"I just wish there was some way I could help them in a way that made them feel safe," Carina said, shaking her head, "But I cannot blame them for staying away because the hospital is terrifying right now."
Maya nodded, gripping the side of her chair so she wouldn't jump up and pull Carina close.
Minute 7
"So anyways," Carina said, shaking her head, trying to forget the sight of her dead patient and her baby, "Ben and Travis had just dropped off a patient, and I walked outside and had a bit of a… crackdown?"
"Breakdown," Maya clarified, smiling a little at the mistake.
"Si," Carina said, "He asked what was wrong, and I told him how hard it is to watch everyone be alone and to be alone myself. He asked why we weren't together and then he said to "go get your girl."
"So this is Warren's doing?" Maya asked, leaning back in her chair.
"Si," Carina said, "I mean, I wanted to, but I didn't think we should because Ben and Baily are staying apart, but he's right. We don't have kids. We are both healthy, and I know that doesn't mean nothing bad will happen, but I feel like it's worse to be alone, apart, and miserable than to be together and increase our risks because I swear if I have to spend one more night alone after a miserable day at work… I don't think I can do it."
"I know," Maya said, nodding, "Me too, and I'm not even under anywhere near the same pressures as you at work. Remind me to find some way to try to thank Warren."
"I will help you," Carina said, smiling.
"You're friends are really good for our relationship," Maya said, "I still need to figure out how to repay Teddy."
"I would have taken you back without her prompting," Carina said, "Probably."
Minute 6
Just then, there was a knock on the door. Carina moved so she was in the far corner of Maya's office, as far from the door as possible, just in case.
"Come in," Maya called. A second later, the door opened and Jack came in.
"They got the tiger," the lieutenant said, "We can use the barn again without risk of getting eaten."
"Thank you," Maya said, nodding.
"Oh," Jack said, realizing Carina was in the office, "Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt."
Carina didn't say anything, not trusting herself to say anything nice to her girlfriend's ex.
"Thank you for the update," Maya said, trying to get him out of her office, "You all can get back to work. I am kinda in the middle of something."
"Understood," Jack said, "I will leave you and your very jealous Italian girlfriend alone."
Maya face turned red as Jack walked out, closing the door.
"Sorry about that," Maya said, looking back at Carina.
"You work with him," Carina said, jaw a little tight, "I know that. What was he talking about at the end?"
"Oh…" Maya said, biting her lip as she and Carina sat back down, "Well, earlier, I was trying to workout and he was using the gym to make a phone call and I told him to get out, that we couldn't be alone together per your request… and I may have called you my very jealous Italian girlfriend."
Maya's face was the color of a tomato at this point, and she wasn't looking at Carina.
"Good," Carina said, smiling a little as she watched Maya, "Because you are right about that. I am very jealous."
Maya looked up, smiling when she saw the look on Carina's face, "You're not mad?"
"I'm not mad that you aren't spending time with him?" Carina said incredulously, still not comfortable saying Jack's name, "No. I'm not mad that you told him that you are mine."
"God, I wish I could kiss you right now," Maya said, looking back at her phone.
Minute 5
"Five more minutes," Carina said with a sigh, "Did I hear him say they got the tiger?"
"Oh, yeah," Maya said, nodding, "Some woman thought it was a great idea to rescue a baby Bengal tiger from a roadside zoo and keep it in her yard."
"Seriously?" Carina said, eyebrows raised.
"Yeah," Maya said, shaking her head, "And then the mailman rang the doorbell and the tiger attacked the woman."
"Stupida," Carina said, shaking her head.
"Yeah," Maya agreed, "But she didn't make it. And part of me wants to say it's her fault, that she deserved it for keeping a 350 lbs. tiger in her yard, but she was just trying to save it from the terrible life it had so I don't know."
"Yes, but keeping a dangerous exotic animal in your yard in Seattle is not wise," Carina said, "A tiger is a wild animal, no matter what, it's instincts will always take over at some point."
"Am I a tiger?" Maya asked after a beat, not meeting Carina's eye.
"Cosa?" the Italian woman asked.
"Am I some dangerous animal who is trying to live in your back yard, but one day will instinctually lash out and hurt you beyond repair?" Maya asked, insecurity all but swallowing her, something she had spent her whole life trying to avoid.
"Bella," Carina said, body physically aching to touch Maya, "Hey, look at me. You are not a tiger. I trust you enough to move in with you. I would never move in with a tiger, and I would never love a tiger. It's too dangerous. I let myself love you because I think not loving you is more dangerous than letting myself love you."
Maya took a shaky breath, nodding as she fought the insecurity and the tears.
"God, I wish I could touch you," Carina said, crossing her arms to keep her hands to herself.
Minute 4
"Soon," Maya said, grabbing a tissue and dabbing away the tears, knowing better than to touch her eyes during the pandemic.
They sat for a beat before Maya spoke again.
"So whose place are we going to move into?" Maya asked.
"Well, my lease is up at the end of this month," Carina said, "So I guess yours?"
"Is that ok with you?" Maya asked, knowing her place held some not so great memories just like her office.
"Si," Carina said, nodding, "Your place is closer to both of our jobs, and has more space than my place. Plus, you have a fire place which has always made me extremely jealous. And I have that creepy neighbor who I would not mind leaving behind."
"He is kinda unnerving," Maya agreed, knowing exactly who Carina was talking about, "I swear he cracks his door and watched me leave every time I go. Ok. So my place. I have an extra key, if you want to go over there before I'm off and just so you have a key to our place."
"Our place," Carina said, smiling, "Are you alright with us moving into your place?"
"Yeah," Maya said, nodding, "Of course. I love my place, and making it our place will make me love it even more. This is the first time I've ever had anyone move in who wasn't a friend, and I'm so glad it gets to be someone I love as much as you."
It was Carina's turn to blush as Maya looked at her, butterflies filling her stomach. It was maddening how Maya could do that to her.
Minute 3
"Three more minutes," Maya said, glancing back at her phone, "Are we going to have to do this every night?"
"No," Carina said, "One, there are not enough tests. This is just a precaution before we officially do this. After this one, we will just have to be careful and be honest with each other if we start feeling sick. Two, I would never be able to wait this long after every shift to kiss you."
"Good," Maya said, smiling, "Because I can't imagine waiting every night. What are we going to do if one of us get this and the other one doesn't?"
"Well, some of my colleagues are living in a hotel near the hospital that is basically only open for first responders so whoever is not sick could go there," Carina said, "Or we could quarantine in separate rooms of the house… I don't know."
"Well, both of those are good options," Maya said, nodding, "As long as we have some idea of a plan, we should be alright if it does happen. And we can make the final decision if, god forbid, we find ourselves in that situation."
"I hope we don't," Carina said, shaking her head, "This illness, the things it can do to the body, it is terrifying. I mean, Andrea's girlfriend is currently in the ICU hanging by a thread and she was perfectly healthy last week."
"I know," Maya said, feeling Carina starting to spin, "We will be as careful as we can, and if we get sick, we will take care of ourselves and do what we can. If your scared I'm going to give this to you, we don't have to do this."
"No," Carina said, shaking her head, "No, I am scared I am going to give it to you and that you will get sick and I will be responsible for it."
"Car," Maya said, getting Carina's eyes back on her, "I know the risks and I am willing to accept them if it means being with you. I understand what can happen, and I'm all in still."
Carina took a deep breath, nodding as she grabbed a tissue of her own.
Minute 2
"I can't imagine being Ben and Bailey right now," Maya said, shaking her head, "Ben is literally staying here."
"Si," Carina said, "Bailey is staying at the hotel with many other doctors. The past three weeks have been torture. I cannot imagine going months or more."
"You really think it's going to last months?" Maya said.
"I don't see this going away until we have a vaccine," Carina said, nodding, "Which could be months or even years."
Maya let out a sigh, "This all sucks."
"It really does," Carina said, "I was supposed to go to Italia this summer for my cousin's wedding and now, who knows if he will even be able to get married this year."
"You were going to go to Italy?" Maya asked, hearing about this for the first time.
"Si," Carina said, "I was thinking about asking you if you wanted to go too, but now, who knows the next time I will get to go home."
"I'm sorry Car," Maya said, "How is everything going with your family over there?"
They had talked about how they were doing a few times, but Maya hadn't asked in almost a week.
"They are alright," Carina sighed, "Most of them are staying home. My papa is still insisting on going to his office which is terrifying, but I cannot do anything from here. The country is still in complete lockdown. Their case numbers are slowly starting to level off, but it's still bad. And unlike the US, their government actually took good steps to protect them."
"Yeah," Maya said, shaking her head, "We are in trouble."
Carina just nodded, not wanting to think about what the future of the pandemic would look like in the US.
Minute 1
They both stared at the time, watching as each second tick by on Maya's phone.
"This has been the longest fifteen minutes of my entire life," Maya said, glancing at Carina before looking back at the phone.
"Si," Carina said, nodding in agreement, "This has felt longer than the past three weeks."
"I think it's because we know it's about to end," Maya said, taking her eyes off the phone again, locking eyes with Carina, "For the past three weeks, there has been no end in sight to our separation, but now, as long as we are both healthy, this all ends in…36 seconds."
"How is there still 36 seconds left?" Carina said, smiling at her girlfriend who was still across the room, "This is torture."
Maya nodded in agreement. They both went back to staring at the phone, neither of them talking as the time slowly ran down.
Minute 0
The time finally, finally hit zero and they both got up, looking at their tests.
"Negative," Maya said, looking at Carina.
"Also negative," Carina said, smiling at her girlfriend, "I guess that means…"
Before Carina could even finish her sentence, Maya's lips had crashed into her own. This started a long make out session, Carina pulling at Maya's uniform, undoing some of the buttons as Maya tugged the hem of Carina's shirt. Before they got far, the alarm started going off.
"I have to go," Maya said, frowning.
"I will see you in the morning?" Carina asked, "At home?"
"At our home," Maya said, stealing one more kiss, "God, I didn't think today could get any crazier than a tiger, but this, the happiness I feel right now, that is crazier than a million tigers."
I hope you liked it. I loved the Marina content we got this week, and also the Carina scenes. I can't wait to explore her character more this season. Anyway, I hope you liked this!