Chapter 37:

DPOV

That night was a little easier. She was still clinging to me, but at least we both slept, which was a huge improvement.

When the light came pouring through the window I woke up and so did Rose. It was a trade off I was willing to make. It was early but I was used to an early morning. I had always had it as a Guardian, evident by our six o'clock training sessions. Rose had been different. I remember how she had complained about how early we started training practically every single morning. I smiled thinking back to those days.

I had left the curtains open slightly so Rose could see when it became light outside. She had gotten up and was standing in that single ray of sunshine. It was like she was recharging. She needed to know it really was the sun. I however only noticed how she was wearing one of my shirts and her bare legs poking underneath the shirt. I stirred and I rolled onto my side trying to hide my arousal. I had woken up with it and I didn't know how to handle it. The last few nights I had been too exhausted to have much of a bodily reaction in the morning. But I had one now. If Rose kept sleeping in my bed, she was bound to feel it at some point. Would it excite her? Would it scare her?

I stuffed the thought back for another day and calmed myself down while she had her eyes closed bathing in the morning light.

We got dressed quickly and went downstairs for breakfast. I could already smell my mother's cooking.

I walked into the kitchen and started helping my mother. It was early and everyone else was still asleep. Adrian was still snoring loudly on the couch in the living room and the rest of the house was quiet. Even the babies still slept.

Rose was watching us from the kitchen threshold.

"I am making blini's, they are little pancakes, you want to help?" I asked. I remember how it went the last time I asked her to help me in the kitchen. But maybe here in the morning on the other side of the world things would be better.

I started to grab the ingredients and Rose actually came into the kitchen and handed me a bowl to put everything in. I suppose she wanted to help. That was progress. I put some ingredients in the bowl and handed her the mixer. She started mixing. I put in the flour, and some of it got on her. She looked up at me angry, I hadn't done it on purpose.

Then a large smirk was plastered across her face. She took a bit of flour and she flung it in my face.

I was a little stunned, a little angry and a lot happy. The action was very Rose and the smirk on her face sent butterflies to my stomach. I saw what she was doing next. She put the bowl down but kept a firm hold on the flour package. Realisation at what she was going to do struck me. I could have stopped her. Maybe I should have, but I didn't want to jeopardize her mood. I didn't want this Rose to go away.

She started flinging more my way. She was enjoying herself, I grabbed her hand that held the flour package and playfully took some out of it and flung it in her direction. Now it was on. I could see a bit of the old fire in her eyes returning. Unfortunately it distracted me long enough for Rose to deck me. I pulled Rose down with me. I was now on the ground, my elbows carrying my upper body weight. Rose was straddled in my lap still holding the package of flour. I could tell she found the position we were in as compromising as I did and for a moment I saw her breath hitch. It took me a few breaths to calm myself back down and I noticed Rose was doing the same. That was promising.

Rose seemed to have collected herself first, because before I realized what was happening the smirk was back on Rose's face and she was dumping the entire contents of the flour package on top of me. For good measure she even shook the package to get every last speck of flour on me. I stared at her through flour filled lashes. She wiped some of it from my face. She was laughing. I pushed myself up a bit more. I needed my arms free in order to do my own damage control, but it also had the effect of getting real close to Rose. I was inches away from her. I saw her looking at my lips. And I knew I probably didn't have flour on my lips, so she was looking at it for an entirely different reason.

My mother broke up the moment though when she came into the kitchen.

"Honestly, you two, look at my kitchen. Go and wash up before breakfast. Just look at you two, you look like a pair of ghosts."

I saw the smile behind her words. If she had wanted to stop us she could have after we threw the first bits of flour, but she didn't. I realized it had been very long since I had been remotely happy and the smile on my face was convoying that exact message to my mother.

I laughed and got up with Rose still in my lap. I picked her up and carried her over my shoulder. I wiggled a bit trying to get the most of the flour off of us and walked up the stairs into the shower. I heard Rose laugh behind me. It was good to hear her laugh.

I stripped down and Rose did the same. I looked away when she stripped down to her underwear. We had taken every shower together since she had been turned back. But this felt different. The small moments we had shared since then fueling my need for her and my optimism she might still be in there. But when I turned around to Rose she didn't seem to notice. so I guess it was just me.

I know I told myself that I was fine with how she was, and I would be. But like when she was Strigoi the real Rose seemed to be so close. I almost laughed. She was still just out of reach. She was so close to the surface I could feel her. It was more frustrating this way then when she was completely gone.

I cleared my head. She would come back to me. I know she would. It had only been a couple of days since she had been restored and she was already getting better here. I just had to be patient. Somebody just had to inform my body.

I turned the shower on and got under the stream. Rose joined me, but I noticed she was trying hard not to let her eyes wonder. Okay, so maybe she was crawling a little closer to the surface these days.

We helped each get rid of the flour, which was no easy task after it had gotten wet. I had a big chunk stuck in my hair. She had to laugh. I couldn't really see what I was doing so she offered to help me. I bent down and she stretched up a bit. This way she could wash the glob of flour from my hair. But this way her breasts were also a few inches from my face. Whatever God I had offended I was praying to for forgiveness, because this just wasn't fair.

"I think it is out. I think you have some too. Turn around." Turn around so your perfectly sculpted breasts aren't hitting me in the face and you don't see my raging hard on.

She turned around and I started to pick bits and pieces of flour out of her hair too. I lingered on her back for a bit and felt her shiver. Okay we were making very good progress.

"All done." She turned back around to face me. She didn't say anything, she just stood there inches away from me. Inches away from my lips. She moved closer still. I doubt it was a conscious thought. It is just something that happened when we were close. We couldn't escape each other's orbit when we were near each other.

I thought she would close the distance and kiss me. But a mere breath away she pulled back.

"We should get back down stairs. Your mother would have finished making breakfast by now."

And with those words she left me alone in the shower.

After the slightly arousing and frustrating shower we went downstairs. My mother cleaned up the kitchen and everyone was at the kitchen table eating breakfast. Adrian lifted an eyebrow when we both came back down with wet hair. But he didn't say anything, not out loud and not through the bond. Good.

After breakfast my grandmother came over to the three of us. She spoke Russian to me, Rose and Adrian. Although my grandmother could speak perfect English albeit it accented, she refused to speak it, making everyone think she couldn't.

I wasn't going to spoil her secret. I was wondering what she was up to.

"Pick up those bags; we are going to help a friend."

I picked up all three but my grandmother slapped me across the arms. She pointed at one and I only picked up that one. Adrian and Rose picked up the other two. I noticed that mine was heaviest followed by Rose's, Adrian seemed to be the lightest.

We walked across town. It was hot outside and the bags were heavy. I could see Adrian sweating, the sun affecting him more than us. Adrian was complaining and whining through the bond. At least he had the sense not to complain out loud. But I doubt my grandmother didn't notice.

Every time he wanted to put his bag down, my grandmother would look back and glare at him. He then reluctantly picked his bag up and complained through the bond again that my grandmother was a sadistic hag. I also saw Rose struggling, but she soldiered on. That's my girl. But I must admit. I was having trouble too. These bags were heavy. What in god's name had she put in there?

We finally arrived at a house on the outskirts of town. A man was standing in the yard and greeted Babushka. I felt shock coming from Adrian, so large I was pulled into his head. I saw why he was shocked. I could see the man's aura, it was rimmed in black. This man was shadow-kissed. A Moroi woman walked out of the house and she greeted my grandmother. I could see gold in her aura. She was no doubt a spirit user and his bondmate. Now I knew why she had brought us here. But what was in those bags.

"Mark, here are the stones I promised you."

I just stared at my grandmother. She actually had us hauling bags with bricks? Adrian and Rose came to the same realization when Mark opened the bags and I swear Adrian was about to strangle my grandmother.

She simply waved her hand dismissing his rage. She pointed at the door indicating we should go inside. Adrian was fuming but his curiosity got the better of him. She did bring us to a spirit user. And one that seemed sane.

We entered the house and the woman seemed to immediately know who we were. Or more accurately, what we were.

We sat down at the table.

"It is rare to see another bonded pair, We have only encountered one other pair in our lives. A guy in America."

This peaked Adrian's interest. "Actually, Rose was bonded as well but the bond is broken now. And I have met two other Spirit users, one I know well, And I met this guy in Vegas, but you know another one?"

The woman seemed a little confused at first, but she showed recognition when we mentioned Las Vegas.

"In Las Vegas you say. Robert Doru lives in Las Vegas."

"That is the guy, the guy I met. He knew so much about Spirit but he didn't seem to have it all together anymore."

The guy, Mark, looked sad. "No, after his bondmate died he was never the same. He described it as losing a limb even though the bond is one way, he felt it when it was broken. But you broke the bond, how did you do that." He asked Rose. Then his face contorted like he had just asked something offensive. "Oh I am sorry, did your bondmate die?"

I could see her feeling anxious, contemplating the question and more importantly the answer. But we knew so little about Spirit and about what had happened to Rose, if anyone could help us it was them.

She looked at me, trying to see if I trusted them enough to tell them the truth. I doubt Adrian could keep his mouth shut. Also they know Robert themselves, maybe they even knew about the ability to turn back Strigoi. I didn't know if I trusted them, but Babushka obviously did. Also she had the same ability as Adrian to restore Strigoi. She deserved to know.

I nodded to Rose.

She let the words out that had haunted me since I had heard them the first time. The first time she had realised she had died, she had been traumatised as well. It was funny that had been Viktors fault. The brothers seem to have been intricately linked to Rose one way or the other.

"No I died. Do you think she felt it?"

"Felt what?" I asked her. Not really catching on.

"My death."

Lissa, she was talking about Lissa. Mark had said Robert had gone crazy after he lost his bondmate.

I considered this and realized I didn't know. I didn't know anything about Lissa after Rose had died. She was my charge and I didn't even check in on her before I was transferred to Adrian. I felt guilty. Maybe Lissa was as crazy as Robert by now and I didn't even know.

Adrian came to my rescue.

"I know she felt it. She was the one who told us you died, we still had hope that maybe you were just taken, but Lissa was sure, she actually described it very similarly as Robert did. She never felt the bond, but she knew the instance she was alone again. But she is fine. I dream-walk her sometimes and although she misses you terribly and is still grieving, she hasn't gone insane."

Well at least one of us is a good friend. Adrian continued and I wish he hadn't

"Rose, I know it would mean everything to her to know you are alive, maybe if we…"

"No, I can't Adrian. I can't, please Dimitri he can't tell her."

Damn it, Rose was doing so much better. I pulled her close to me and comforted her.

"Don't worry. He won't tell her. We won't do anything until you are ready."

She was sobbing in my chest. I glared at Adrian, he threw his hands up in exasperation. I understood how he felt, but pushing her obviously wasn't helping. I wondered why Lissa was such a trigger for her.

Mark and his wife Oksana were confused. We ended up telling them what happened to Rose. They were surprised, but intrigued. I told them everything including what the darkness did to her before she was turned and what her coping mechanism was. I saw Mark contemplate this.

"Well I never thought about it like that. Burning it off?"

"Well how do you cope? Rose hunted Strigoi, Lissa got depressed and Adrian just drank a lot."

He looked towards his wife. Maybe it was easier sharing it between lovers.

"Well we try and keep the magic to a minimum but when I feel there is too much darkness, Oksana just heals it out of me."

Adrian looked like he was stupid. I was also sceptical. The answer can't be that simple.

"Isn't that just making it worse? I mean that just creates a circle doesn't it?" I asked.

"It is a delicate balance." Oksana confessed. "I can only heal small bits and Mark will only take small bits, but we have been bonded for many years and it works."

It wasn't a perfect system, but at least we had a back-up plan other than getting wasted and going on a killing spree. It gave me hope. With Rose being restored I had very little time to contemplate my own impending insanity. So it was nice to know that it didn't have to be that way.

We talked for hours. Well Adrian and Oksana talked. Mark and I occasionally shared comments and looks, Rose just listened. I could tell she was taking in everything we said, but she didn't say anything else anymore.

On the way back, Adrian was walking besides Rose and talking about how incredible this was. He was distracting Rose long enough for my grandmother to have a private moment with me.

"This isn't working, Dimitri. This isn't how you get her back. Treating her like a child and cuddling her won't help her. If you remember who she used to be, how you two communicated before, you will know how to get her back."