AN: Hey guys, I hope you had a Merry Christmas/Hanukkah/New Year this year. If you wondering why I haven't updated so much in the past two weeks or so its because of the holidays. When you get older you tend to have less free time to yourselves (I'm 26 if people are curious).
Not much to say. I'm working on Partners Under Fire to get updated next.
Disclaimer: I don't own Paw Patrol
***Better Dead Then Red***
"Ryder! Ryder!" shouted Rubble with excitement as he rushed through the Lookout, looking for his owner. Said owner was busy on the couch playing his video games on his Pup Pad when he noticed Rubble heading towards him. "Ryder! You won't believe what happened!"
"Chase and Skye finally hook up?"
"No."
"Mr. Porter finally got Alex sent to a mental institution?"
"No, but I wish."
"HavocHound released Zuma's Courage?"
"You know that's coming in the New Year, Ryder, but this is just as good!" shouted Rubble, who then puffed out his chest. "We caught a communist!"
Of all the things he expected Rubble to say, this was the furthest from my mind. "A… communist?"
"Yup! Those godless, child eating, American pie hating bastards thought they could take away our freedom and democracy! But we caught one and we're gonna force him to tell us where his fellow communists are!" shouted Rubble.
Ryder snorted and shook his head. "Where did you and the pups learn about Communism, Rubble?"
"Youtube."
Figures, thought Ryder, rolling his eyes as he got up and smiled. "Take me to this… communist, Rubble."
"Okay, follow me!" said Rubble, leading Ryder towards the direction of the door. "We've already started integrating him for information, but he's been very strong willed."
Just then, Chase came out, wearing his uniform and saluted to Ryder. "Hello, Ryder, sir. Did Rubble tell you we captured the dirty commie?"
"Y-yes, Chase," said Ryder, doing his best not to laugh.
"Hard to believe that one our own was a communist. Good thing we realized he was one or else he might have killed us in our sleep!" said Chase, leading the two.
"Or brainwashed us into hating all the great things about America like McDonalds, or Burger King, or Red Robin, or Pizza Hut, or Dominos, or Taco Bell, or-"
"I think we get it, Rubble," said Chase before he stopped and presented their captured pray with his arm extended. The so called "communist" was Marshall who was hanging by his feet via rope that Skye was holding in the air with her wings. Rocky was using his claw to tickle Marshall with a single feather while Zuma, doing his best to look tough, kept asking questions.
"Tell us again! What are the Communists up to! What are your plans for attack?! Who ate the last of the vanilla ice cream tweats!" demanded Zuma,
"Hahahaha!" laughed Marshall, struggling to answer as his face turned red. "I…hahaha…not…haha-a-a-a-a Comm-phhhf-unist! And BWAHAHAHA! Rubble ate them!"
"Hey! You said you would tell, Marshall!" whined Rubble.
Ryder smirked with amusement before he asked, "Rocky? Stop tickle torching, Marshall. I think he'll be unable to breathe if you keep doing that."
Rocky hesitated at first, but then nodded and put his claw away. Marshall took in deep breaths as he looked at Ryder and thanked him with a smile. "Pups, why do you think Marshall is a communist spy?" asked Ryder.
"Easy," said Chase. "It's because he wears red!"
There was a long silence.
"And?" asked Ryder.
"And what?"
"You mean that's it?"
"Isn't that enough?"
Ryder snorted. "Chase, you cannot arrest somebody for being a communist if they have red on them. Lots of people wear red. Even I wear some red." He pointed to his uniform. "See?"
"Yeah, but you have red, while, and blue. That's American! Marshall's pure red. That's Communist!" said Skye.
"Pups, he's not a communist. Communism is a failed ideology that has been proven time and again to be nothing more than an idealist dream turned into a total dictatorship. Marshall is not a communist and I would know if he was," said Ryder, putting some firmness in his voice. "Now put him down and release him."
Skye hesitated for a bit but she gave in and dropped Marshall on the ground to which Rocky freed him with his scissors. "Ugh, finally! I gotta pee bad!" shouted Marshall as he rushed away and towards the other end of the Lookout."
Ryder crossed his arms and smiled. "Now have you pups learned your lesson?"
"Yes, Ryder," they all said.
Meanwhile, once Marshall was sure nobody was following him, he activated his pup pad and smiled. "Великий лидер Путин, ты меня слышишь?"
***Better Dead Then Clean***
"In loving memory of Rocky
Rest in Peace
Green Forever Is Go"
Such was the tombstone of the first Paw Patroler to go to the grave. It was a nice gravestone of his pup emblem in black stone with flowers and wreaths decorating it from a funeral that ended only moments ago. Deep inside the earth, rested in the nurturing embrace of darkness was a coffin containing the mixed breed. With a final smile he rested on his green pillow, his body comforted in eternal sleep while wearing a nice green suit and his paws folded over his barrel as they held flowers of all kinds.
Such would have been a nice and peaceful sleep… if he was dead that is. Rocky opened his eyes and, upon seeing the inside of his coffin, barked in excitement. "Yes! I did it! I faked my death!"
He sat up, as best as he could, and was thankful that the coffin was roomy enough to maneuver. "No more baths for me! Who would have thought that ketchup was a good substitute for blood?" He sighed in relaxation as he waited… and waited… and waited…
Wait a minute.
A thought came to Rocky. "H-how am I going to get out?"
He had no food. Had maybe an hour of air left. And need to use the bathroom badly; standing still for hours makes a pup gotta go.
"Help! Let me out of here!" shouted Rocky as he banged on the top of the casket over and over again.
Outside, Rubble and Ryder, both with shovels, were eating a small sandwich meal while hearing Rocky repeatedly. Rubble then asked, "So how long should we let him squirm?"
"For what he's done? Maybe another thirty minutes," answered Ryder.
*** Tracker x Everest? ***
With every new episode that went up, the pups would often see what new fanfiction, fanart, or theories the fans of their show made. So after the Winter Wonder Show episode, naturally the group figured there would be a few new fanfare to see.
"Trust me, there is going to be tons of me and Everest. I mean did you see the way she looked at me? She digs me," said Marshall with a smile as he and his five other friends entered the Lookout. Skye was the first to get online and start searching around. "Now if only she just admit her feelings to me in real life."
"You know, you could always tell her yourself," pointed out Rocky, rolling his eyes. "But I'm more interested in seeing Tracker's new fan art."
"Hoping that the fans will draw you and him in a loving embwace?" snickered Zuma which made the other pups laugh at the blush decorating his cheeks. It was no secret to any of them that Rocky had developed a crush on the jungle pup after he was rescued by him from the snakes. "I'm all for it. Less fanfiction of you and me doing it I my pup house. Seriously, I'm only a kid, what are they thinking?"
"Woah!" shouted Skye, eyes widened. "This is new!"
"How new?" asked Rubble.
"Check it out."
The pups all squished together and gasped at what they saw… an art of Everest and Tracker making out. And judging by the google number hits, there were a lot of them. "B-b-b-but they only met once!" shouted Marshall in disbelief. "Are you telling me that these are now hundreds of thousands of these?!"
"So, I only met Silvia once and I'm paired were her at time when Skye's paired with you or Zuma or someone," pointed out Chase.
"Yeah, but they got nothing in common! Tracker is a jungle pup who speaks Spanish… which is a little sexy," whispered Rocky.
The doors soon opened as Everest, shaking the snow off her, walked in and smiled. "Hi, pups!"
"Hi, Everest!" shouted the pups, with Marshall being the loudest.
"What's new in the Paw Patrol fandom world?" asked Everest, walking in closer.
"Just you and Tracker are now the newest couple on the list," replied a grinning Everest, showing a few more saucy photos she found that made Everest blush.
"Y-yeah, but it's not like Everest is really interested now is she, hahahaha," laughed Marshall, but unbeknownst to him Everest was giving it some serious thought.
"You know, that Spanish voice of his is really sexy…" whispered Everest which made both Rocky and Marshall freeze. "Eh, why not? I've always wanted to date a foreigner." She hit her tag. "Hey, Tracker. You read me?"
"Si! What can I do for you, amigo?"
"Wanna go on a date?"
"De Verdad? Guay! I would love to take you out, Everest. Hasta que nos conocimos esta noche mi querida!"
"Great! See you then!" she said before leaving. "Better get to Katie's for my date."
"Oh! I'm come with you!" shouted Skye as she jumped out and rushed behind a stunned Marshall and Rocky as the two female pups ran out.
Chase, Zuma, and Rubble amusingly watched the two stunned pups stand there frozen until Chase said, "Three. Two. One."
"WAAAAAHHHHH!" cried Marshall and Rocky as they held on to each other, crying tears of loss.
"Popcorn?" asked Rubble, showing a bowl to the others who took it with thanks.