Chapter 7

So, the Radiant Garden Rebellion had a new member.

He was… interesting…

("He's freaking feral is what he is," Lea muttered once when on one was listening.)

Vanitas somehow seemed to have even less of a clue about human social interaction than Roxas did when Axel had first met him. And given that Roxas was basically a zombie at that time, that was saying something.

Unfortunately, unlike Roxas at that time, Vanitas was too proud to ask questions about it and grew prickly if someone implied his lack of understanding.

Or maybe it was just that Vanitas seemed prickly about everything.

Even so, he had great ideas.

"Why did we never think of this before?" asked Lea as he tried his best to smother his laughter from their hiding place.

"This is better than the tiger and the Cerberus," agreed Isa, uncharacteristically giggly.

Roxas and Xion looked like they were going to protest on their summons' behalf, but then looked at the scene before them, snickered in unison, and had to admit he was right.

Vanitas preened. "You're welcome," he said.

Below them was the picture of utter disaster. Items were being flung, Ansem and his apprentices were running scared, and there were white feathers everywhere.

At the center of it all was the large gaggle of very nasty geese that Vanitas had insisted they sneak into the castle, where they proceeded to attack everything in sight.

It was pure chaos that only an evil mastermind could come up with.

Sometimes, however, Vanitas's ideas were a little too dangerous.

"No," said Isa, shooting down his most recent idea immediately.

"Aw, why not?" asked Lea. "Sounds like it would be funny."

Isa groaned and rubbed his head. "No, Lea, we are not switching the labels on the chemicals in the labs. That's just asking for disaster."

"Oh yeah, how?" Vanitas challenged.

"Didn't Vexen yell at Demyx for doing something like that?" asked Roxas, frowning at the memory.

Xion thought a moment and nodded. "Oh right, he said that the chemicals he was working with could be really nasty if mixed wrong. Like poison the castle or blow us all to Kingdom Hearts nasty."

"Still sounds funny to me," said Vanitas, clearly not caring about the possible consequences of that. He then frowned and asked, "Wait, who are Vexen and Demyx?"

Isa shrugged, and the others only said, "Nobodies."

Vanitas frowned in confusion but didn't push further.

Lea, now realizing what a bad idea that was, offered a compromise. "How about instead we just safely dump all the chemicals and switch them with colored water? How does that sound?"

Isa, Roxas, and Xion nodded, and Vanitas scowled but didn't argue.

Much.

"I still think them blowing themselves up would be hilarious," he griped.

"Sure it is, buddy," said Roxas, not meaning a word of it.

Vanitas perks up at the word 'buddy', and doesn't complain any further.

Though they all wonder why he ran off to yell, "IN YOUR FACE, VENTUS!" at the sky a second later.

(In the Land of Departure, Ventus sneezed and got the sinking feeling he was wrong about something. But what?

And why did he get the sense Vanitas had something to do with it…)

"Why didn't we think of this sooner?" asked Isa as they snuck into the castle once again. "If we want to stop them from researching hearts, this should have been the first thing we did."

"We both try to avoid regular libraries as much as possible, and Roxas and Xion didn't even know what a library is," replied Lea as they snuck around another corner.

"We do so," said Roxas indignantly. "Belle has one. We saw her in it. We just didn't know this castle had one too."

"What is a library, anyway?" asked Vanitas.

The rest of them stopped to stare at him, and Vanitas glared back just daring them to ask why he didn't know already.

"It's a room or building with lots and lots of books in it for people to read," Xion answered.

Getting his answer, Vanitas' hackles lowered. "Huh," he said thoughtfully. "I think I've seen those around."

"I'm more surprised you're not wondering why we're stealing their heart research," said Isa.

Vanitas's expression darkened. "Don't need an explanation there. Messing with hearts is bad news. End of story."

"Got that right," agreed Roxas as he tapped the door to the castle's library with his keyblade and let them in.

Only to freeze in his tracks and cause the rest of the group to crash into his back.

Peering out around him, they all stalled themselves at the sight.

The youngest apprentice, Ienzo, was sitting at a table in the library, staring back at them from over the top of a large book.

There was a silent standoff as both sides measured each other up.

The Radiant Garden Rebels really had no idea what Ienzo would do. Because of his young age, he had mostly been exempt from their pranks on the apprentices and guards. He'd occasionally get caught up in their bigger hijinks, but unlike all the adults he hadn't been targeted specifically.

Ienzo didn't look at all surprised to see them there. His one visible eye staring at them on an expressionless face.

Then, to their surprise, he didn't make any sound or do anything to alert the guards.

Instead, he silently pointed in the direction of one of a set of shelves, and following his finger, the teens all saw that he was indicating the very section of the research they'd wanted to steal.

Looking back at the kid, Xion gave him a warm smile. "Thanks," she said.

"But if anyone asks, we were never here," added Lea, holding a finger up to his lips.

Ienzo nodded and went back to his book.

And when the other apprentices loudly began loudly shouting upon finding all the research being suddenly replaced with cookie recipes, he didn't say a word.

"So what are we gonna do with all this?"

"What else? Burn it!"

Isa was pretty sure Vanitas was becoming a bad influence on his friends.

Case and point, when Lea gleefully agreed with Vanitas' plan to dispose of the heart research they'd stolen, Roxas offered to help, and Xion thought it might be fun.

Seeing he was outvoted, Isa didn't bother to argue and instead said, "Okay, but we do this outside the city, so we don't burn everything else down in the process."

Lea beamed at him. "Awesome."

Admittedly, the bonfire was pretty fun. Especially when Vanitas chucked some extra books into the air for Xion to cast spells at, and Lea brought out marshmallows for s'mores.

Ienzo was glaring.

Even didn't seem to notice his glaring as he continued to lecture Ienzo about the importance of being careful and not experimenting without an adult present.

Nothing he was experimenting with was in any way harmful, and he was taking all the scientific steps necessary to do it properly and take detailed notes while he was at it. He didn't need supervision. Plus, he'd been wanting to do this experiment for weeks, but all the adults had been too busy to help him, so he took matters into his own hands.

All of it added up to Ienzo totally not deserving this lecture and having to wash dishes in the kitchens for the next few days as punishment.

To make matters worse, the reason why he was getting this lecture and punishment was smirking in amusement just behind Even. Ienzo would have finished his experiment already with no one the wiser if Braig hadn't ratted him out.

Stupid Braig. Ienzo had never liked the jerk.

He'd show him.

A few hours later, Ienzo spotted the Radiant Garden Rebellion was standing a little outside the castle, looking like they were discussing how best to sneak in.

Perfect.

Ienzo quickly snuck into Braig's room and very conspicuously opened the window to catch their attention. Shooting a very pointed look at the rebellious teenagers, he left them to do what they did best.

Braig was quite furious to come back to find his room had been turned into a winter wonderland. And even better, a little bit of planted evidence had him convinced Even was the one who did it.

As he watched the two adults yell at each other, Ienzo was satisfied justice had been served.

This was too hilarious to watch, and if it wouldn't blow their cover, Lea would have wished they had popcorn. As it was, he and his friends kept silent in the vents as they watched the show.

Below them Ansem the Wise was straining to open a jar. Unfortunately for him, the Radiant Garden Rebels had superglued the container shut. Still, watching him struggle was surprisingly entertaining.

Finally admitting defeat, Ansem turned to a scowling Even (who had already tried to open the same jar with no success). "Even, would you fetch one of the guards? It would seem we need their assistance."

Even shot the jar a dirty look and nodded, striding out of the room past Ienzo, who was watching the whole thing looking as amused as Lea felt.

The first guard Even found was Braig, a fact he seemed far from happy about.

The reason why was made clear when Braig opened his mouth. "Maybe should think about leaving the lab on occasion and hitting the gym," he teased snidely. "Then little things like stuck lids wouldn't be a problem."

Even scoffed, Ienzo glared, and Ansem's polite smile turned strained at the comment.

With a smug grin, Braig took the jar and tried to twist the lid.

It didn't budge.

Braig frowned and twisted harder, but it remained firmly in place.

Soon enough he was straining just as much as Ansem had been and getting nowhere.

"Perhaps you should consider hitting the gym," Even said snidely as he left to get a different guard. "Then little things like stuck lids wouldn't be a problem."

Braig shot Even a glare but didn't retort. "Can I just shoot this thing off, or is it one of those things that would explode if I did that?" he asked Ansem in annoyance.

"The latter, unfortunately," said Ansem, sounding like he had considered it too.

Next up was Dilan, who, despite being stronger than Braig, didn't fare any better and was soon glaring at the jar as well.

When Even left again to fetch Aeleus, Ienzo waited until the adults were all too busy complaining to notice him, and snuck over to stand under the vent where Lea was hiding. One look at the kid's face made it clear what he wanted, and while it would kind of undo all their sabotage, the results would be too funny not to.

So, carefully so as not to be seen, Lea pulled out a bottle and dropped it down to him.

Ienzo caught it, rubbed some of the contents on his fingers, and scuttled back to his spot without anyone noticing his movements.

A moment later Aeleus entered the lab and took his own crack at opening the jar.

Despite being the biggest and strongest among them, the jar still refused to budge no matter how hard he strained against the lid.

That was when Ienzo walked up to him and tugged on his coat-sleeve in clear askance to try.

Seeing this, Dilan snorted, "You never gave the kid a shot?" he asked more as a joke than anything else.

Aeleus, seeing no harm in it, knelt down and handed the jar to Ienzo.

"He is a child," said Even. "If we couldn't open it, there's no way he could-"

At that moment the lid came off in Ienzo's hands with a loud 'Pop!'

The scientists and guards all stared slack-jawed as Ienzo held the now open jar up proudly.

In the vents, the rebels smothered their giggles.

Aeleus, though surprised, smiled and ruffled Ienzo's hair in congratulations.

"Aeleus must have loosened it," Braig said defensively.

"Yeah, that must be it," agreed Dilan, not wanting to admit they'd been beaten by a nine-year-old.

Ienzo shot them a dirty look hearing that, and placed the jar on a table, and left.

Which was convenient, as he took the nail polish remover he'd used to open the jar with him, and the apprentices and guards soon found out that all the jars in the lab were super glued.

Not one of them could be opened.

A/N Okay, I know I keep saying this, but I do think there will be one more chapter to wrap up the stuff with Braig and Xehanort. This chapter came because people wanted to see more Vanitas in action, and I started talking with Luna Lillyth about more pranks they can pull. Major credit to her, since she suggested almost all of them, and Ienzo getting involved. Happy Thanksgiving, I'll post the (hopefully) last chapter whenever I finish it.