Billy Hargrove has done a lot of shitty things.
A lot.
So it should come to the surprise of no one that his first week in a new town, he's managed to piss off almost everyone. But the thing is there was this one person. And he wishes he could take it back. Start over. Just prove. He doesn't know what he'd prove, just.
He just has to try to get her not to hate him.
Which he doesn't even know why it matters, it shouldn't一it didn't. But then, he doesn't know when exactly, but he started to care. Care what she thought of him and Billy never cares一never hasn't for a long time.
But something about the look she'd give him in passing times, it was just a quick glance but. He thought there was only one person in this entire world who could look at him like that. Like he was the devil reincarnated and he just couldn't handle it.
One person was enough. He didn't need, couldn't handle two hating him that much.
Which is why he is here doing probably the stupidest thing he's ever done in his entire life. He is going to apologize to Charlie Sinclair and he's going to hope she even bothers to listen.
He combed a hand through his hair one last time, It shook. He was nervous and fuck when was the last time that happened? Nervous was new, he's been scared sure too much maybe but nervous? He didn't like it. Made his stomach feel queasy and his palms sweaty. Whatever.
Just do this. Do this and maybe. Maybe, he doesn't know. But it has to be better than nothing.
He took a deep breath and rang the doorbell.
It seemed chaos issued on the other side of the wooden door there were several voices shouting, loud but he couldn't make out what was being said. Followed by thuds a lot of them then he heard the sound of the door knob turning. He put on his best warface一smile一 and he waited.
Only.
Only it wasn't Charlie who had answered the door. Billy's smile wavered as he looked down at the small girl who had just opened the door. She was young, younger than Max and he can't remember the last time he's been around a kid kid, ya know? Did Charlie have another sibling? Noone mentioned一
"Who the hell are you?"
Billy blinked.
Definitely her sister. The resemblance was uncanny now.
He recovered quickly, smile back in full force, but this kid didn't even care. Of course she didn't. "Um, actually I'm here for Charlie." He stammered, the nerves were back.
She didn't say anything for a minute, looked him up and down, scrutinizing him. Suddenly he was self conscious cause he thought he had worn one of his nicer shirts. But the look this kid was giving him made him feel entirely underdressed. She sighed once rolled her eyes, looked a lot like Charlie while doing it, and hollered.
"Charlie, your boyfriend is here!"
"I'm not一"
"How many times do I have to tell you Steve isn't my boyfriend, twerp?"
If Billy thought this was a bad idea before the look Charlie was giving him, now made him wished he never stepped foot on this stupid porch. As she approached him confused, truthly he still was too and he wanted to turn tail and run.
"Hi, Charlie." He finally said and it all came out in one breath, which was annoying. But. It was something.
"Billy." The smaller girl crossed her arms, leaned against the doorframe.
He gave her his best smile and she narrowed her eyes. He deserved that really. Could not blame her especially after what he did but it still. It made his chest tight. He swallowed once, his mouth was dry. Which was new.
"Look I'm not good at this," He ranted. "In fact I have almost no idea what I'm doing but," But. "I just need一" His mouth was so dry. "I wanted to一" Charlie raised an eyebrow and it was like his tongue swelled up to the size of a golf ball, he couldn't talk if he wanted to. He scratched at his temple, breathed in once deep through his nose and tried again.
"Charlie, I wanted to say sorry."
He couldn't look at her when he said it cause whenever he tried it was like, like his brain short circuited. Her and her stupid eyes, and that stupid look that they only ever had just for him. It made him feel sick. Like he was this terrible, terrible thing and just tainting everything around him.
She didn't say anything and he couldn't一 was too scared to look at her face. Maybe he should just go. Maybe this was. This was just a mistake. Hopefully she would never bring this up to anyone ever and just stick to avoiding eachother in those stupid crowded halls.
"Why are you standing with my door open at night letting out the heat have you一oh."
It was her Mom who had came to the door next. Vaguely Billy remembers meeting her that night, the same night Charlie pointed a shotgun at him, but seeing her again was different this time. Charlie looked a lot like her mom, he realised soft features, kind eyes though they were never directed at him.
"Billy, sweetie, what brings you here so late?" Her voice dripped with warmth he hadn't heard in so long it gave him whiplash. Billy was opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water because this was just a lot.
Charlie turned to her mother. "He was just leaving, Mama." Her hand was already on the door getting ready to close it on him. And he wanted to pretend like it didn't hurt, but. It did. A lot.
"What?" Mrs. Sinclair frowned. "Already he just got here."
Charlie looked visibly irritated. "Well he has things he needs to do," She turned to him. Looked at him with those eyes. "Right Billy?"
Again, a fish out of fucking water. He couldn't formulate a single conherate sentence for the life of him at this moment. And Charlie wouldn't stop looking. So.
"I'm not really doing一" Wrong. The wrong thing to say based on the glare Charlie sent his way but. "This," He had to clear his throat. "Right now."
Charlie rolled her eyes and her mother beamed. Smiled so bright he had to blink. When was the last time someone ever looked at him like that? "Good come on in then and I'll fix you up a plate." She already had a small hand on his shoulder guiding him in the doorway. "Take your shoes off at the door, hun."
There were three bodies gathered around the dinner table, one being the small girl he had meant earlier. She raised an eyebrow at his appearance but other than that went back to her seat. And there was Lucas who looked scared to see him, why wouldn't he?
He made an impression on that kid一 the wrong one. It was shitty and now he's in his house so of course he's scared at the sight of him. But. He maybe wanted to try and make right, fix this.
Then there was Mr. Sinclair. He was a big man bigger than Billy. Had a mustache on his upper lip and Charlie's smile. It was nice. They were nice.
"Not another one," Mr. Sinclair frowned at the sight of Billy, but. It didn't seem like he was mad. "Where does she keep finding all these boys?"
"Charles." Mrs. Sinclair warned, slapping his arm on the way to the table and the man rolled his eyes. He turned to Billy and smiled.
"Nice to meetcha, Son." He offered his hand and Billy took it. His grip was strong and his palms were not as sweaty anymore. Billy smiled. "Nice to meet you, Sir."
And it was honestly. Charlie's dad seemed great. Really nice.
Everyone was getting seated and the only open space was, of course, next to Charlie. So carefully he pulled back the chair and sat down making sure it wasn't too close because truthfully he couldn't handle being in her presence for long. Especially if she kept looking at him like she was trying to light him on fire, maybe she was.
The smell of the food hit him once his back hit the chair and it was heavenly. Susan cooks sure but most of the time he doesn't eat with the family, not like this anyway, because he just can't be around Neil. But Susan's food never smelt this good.
There were dishes of roast beef, green beans, and potatoes. Billy briefly wondered if this is how they ate every night. Something in his chest got tight at the thought.
"Looks great, Mrs. Sinclair." He commented and the woman all but beamed at the compliment.
"When Charles says grace we can all dig in," She grinned before sending a sharp look to her husband. Mr. Sinclair cleared his throat once, "Alright everyone join hands."
Fuck.
Billy took a deep breath and tentatively turned to Charlie. She wasn't looking at him, thank god, but had her palm raised upwards, waiting. He took a deep breathe through his nose and took her hand.
Huh.
Charlie's hand was smaller than his, incredibly so. He never noticed maybe because last time he was this close to her he was wailing his fists into Steve Harrington's face. And drugged with enough shit to knock out an elephant and hit in the head with the butt of her shotgun.
Now that he's paying attention Charlie is a dainty little thing but she has so much fire in her it's easy to forget. Similar to the way Max would act.
Billy mumbled along to the prayer Mr. Sinclair said because truthfully he had no idea what he was saying. Neil used to make them go to church but it never really stuck. He was never the religious type.
Because if there was really someone out there, some big omnipresent super powerful being, and he saw the shit that had happened— was happening to him. And didn't so much as lift a finger? Then they were a piece of shit and wanted nothing to do with it.
Charlie's grip on his hand grew slacked and everyone raised their heads.
"Alright," Mrs. Sinclair chimed. "Eat!"
Then life came back into the room, Billy couldn't even think, as dishes were being passed his way. Just pile more food onto his plate and hope he had the room for it. It wasn't till he got till the fourth dish, because Mrs. Sinclair had made a side of Cornbread he just had to try, that he finally had a moment to taste the food.
It was hard to put into words but basically, her food was fucking delicious. Susan could barely hold a candle to this, and from what he can remember, not even his mother's food was this good. And that was saying a lot.
"So, Billy, how do you know Charlie?"
He had a mouthful of potatoes when Mr. Sinclair asked him. Ah, right. Small talk. He was good with parents so typically situations like these were no brainers but he could feel Charlie burning a hole in the side of his head. So.
"Uh, she was one of the first people I meant when I moved here." Which wasn't a lie really. That first week had been a blur of faces, parties, girls, and drinking, but he didn't forget Charlie. Or her shotgun. "She and her friends helped me adjust to Hawkins."
Charlie didn't say anything and Lucas was just staring at him so it seemed like he said the right thing.
"And where'd you and your folks move from?"
"California sir," He put a bit of roast into his mouth, and all but melted. "The transition was a lot for me and my step sister."
Mrs. Sinclair raised one defined eyebrow. "You have a sister."
"It's Max, Mom." Lucas said from his end of the table around a mouthful of food. That made the youngest sneer.
"You're disgusting, Lucas."
"Shut up, Erica."
"You two have literally been arguing all day, please be quiet."
Mr. Sinclair sighed. "Excuse them and their manners. Or lack there of really." He gave Lucas a look and pointed at his mouth, sure enough bits of food were there and the young boy was wiping it with the back of his hand. "But you said Charlie and her friends helped you adjust?" Billy nodded once. "Do you know Steve then?"
Billy paused for a second not sure what to say. Like yeah I know the guy nearly knocked his head off his shoulders? Sure that'll turn out well. Charlie snickered next to him and Lucas laughed.
"Yeah they know each other really well, Dad." She quipped and sent him a look. "They play basketball together."
He seemed to like that and Charlie glowered. "Oh looks like I'll definitely have to get tickets to the next game then." And for some reason that made Billy smile. It was nice maybe to be acknowledged.
From there it was smooth sailing.
Dinner went by quick, much too quick. He was actually having fun and Charlie's parents seemed to actually like him. Not the Billy who puts on the façade to make parents like him, the normal one. Who really didn't know what he was doing. It was just, nice.
Then before he knew it the table was being cleared and it was almost time for him to go. Charlie had been lingering in the kitchen, staying close enough while she did the dishes to hear the conversation between him and her father, but not enough to be brought into it. It stung. And it shouldn't have.
"Well, Billy, it was a pleasure having you," Mr. Sinclair started. "I'd like to have you over again."
"Yeah I'd love to—" Behind her father Billy could see Charlie glaring at him from the kitchen. It made him freeze. "Uh, it was great, the food was delicious."
Mrs. Sinclair smiled from her spot next to her husband. "Thank you dear it's nice to have someone that actually appreciates my cooking."
Charles seemed unphased and gave his wife a kiss on the cheek. "I'm off suge."
She rolled her eyes. "To work on that piece of scrap metal?" Her only response was a thumbs up as the large man made his way through to what Billy assumed was the garage. "Don't be making noise all night, Charles!"
"Scrap metal?" Billy inquired.
Mrs. Sinclair huffed. "Some beat up old car he's been trying to fix up for a little over forever now."
"I'm not trying to fix it up!" Billy could see where Charlie got it from now. "I am fixing it up!"
Billy couldn't help himself. "What kinda car is it?"
The older man turned slowly towards him. Interested. "A 1978 Buick."
"Not bad," He hummed. "You know the model?"
"Electra 225." He crossed his arms, a smile growing on his face. "You know cars?"
"A bit." Neil didn't pay or care about his car. That was all him. He saved up months worth of checks to get his camaro. "I drive a Chevrolet Camaro. Had to do tune ups myself."
"Really?" He was smiling wide now. "Well I could use another set of hands in there."
Billy tried not to smile and act like he wasn't relieved he didn't have to go home, but. Being around them this family it was just so refreshing compared to his cold home. Compared to Neil.
"Yeah," he agreed. "I got some time to kill."
They stayed out there in that garage for about an hour and a half. Would've stayed longer— wanted to stay longer. But Mrs. Sinclair had poked her head in and reminded Charles, he was allowed to call him Charles now, that it was a school night. So he had no choice but to go home.
It was just when he was wiping oil smears off his hands when Charlie finally walked into the garage. She had changed into pajamas which was just a big sweater that seemed to swallow her whole. But it made Billy glance at her for a moment longer than necessary cause she still found some way to look nice.
"Can I get a moment with him, Dad?"
Mr. Sinclair sent a look between both teenagers and had a hint of a frown on his lips. "Yeah," he sighed. "I'll just go get cleaned up."
He kissed her forehead as he went. "Also don't forget to take your meds." He made a grunt like barely a sound of acknowledgment. "I'm being serious dad!" She called after he had long gone back into the house but at the point it had fallen on death ears.
Now he was alone with her.
Billy wiped his hands down once before closing the hood of the car. They had made some a lot of progress with the car. Turns out Charles wasn't aware the engine was completely shot, so he would have to find some parts for that. Also brakes were bad and it needed new bulbs in all the headlights. But. It was manageable. Mostly.
"You're an asshole you know," She called, dragging him out of his thoughts. "Showing up here out of the blue with that shitty apology."
"Look, Charlie—"
"You attacked my brother, Billy." She hissed. "You damn near gave Steve a concussion. His face is still kinda fucked up, ya know?"
He did know. Saw Steve everyday in the hallways at school and at practice. If he was in pain he didn't show it, took the beating like a champ from what he remembers.
"I know what I did was messed up." He had almost a death grip on the dirty rag. "Been thinking about it everyday since."
"We had to tranq you because you were gonna kill him." She reminded as if he wasn't there. Looking back on it now he wishes he could take it all back. But Neil had just pushed him, and it was like he became a black hole. Going around and tainting everything he could that night. Everyone else had just been caught in the crossfire.
"That's why I came here to apologize," He was struggling to find the right words. "I just—" Want you to stop looking at me like that. "I'm sorry for everything that happened that night, Charlie. If I could take it back I would."
"You can't."
Her words stung like she had slapped him. But she was right. You can't change the past no matter how damn hard you wanted to. It was set in stone. And she had no reason to accept his apology in the first place.
"But,"
But.
"My Dad seems to really like you," Billy raised his head, their eyes meeting. The way she was looking at him. It was new. "I'm pretty sure he's about to invite you back next weekend."
"Why would he—"
Charlie rolled her eyes, "Because he finally has someone to help him with this stupid car." Billy was still confused. "Erica likes dolls, I like guns, and Lucas is a nerd. Do the math."
That was nice. Billy would definitely come back and help with this car. He would love to in fact. Anything to get him out the house, so he wouldn't have to be around Neil. He'd jump at the chance.
That also mean more of Mrs. Sinclair's cooking. Definitely could use more of that.
"Ok listen," Charlie began. "You were a complete douchebag the last time I saw you and I don't know what kind of holy revelation you had since then, but if I even get the slightest inkling that you're back on your bullshit." She poked one finger into his chest and it was like his whole body was vibrating. "Then that's it. Over. I mean it, Hargrove."
She was giving him a chance.
A smirk began to work its way onto his features. "Cross my heart." He countered motioning an x over his chest. Charlie rolled her eyes and he smiled. "Promise. I won't screw this up."
"I'll be holding you to that."
She walked away then leaving him in the garage by himself. And he just couldn't stop smiling. Ok maybe this wasn't so bad. He had a chance now, to fix things.
Maybe, he could make this work.