My father and I hardly spoke in the lead up to my first day at UA. If anything he actively avoided me. I took advantage of this and became less secretive about my training. I admit I was being petty. I was trying to bait him into saying something... anything. I practiced some of the more complex techniques I'd seen online, including some of his own. However he never did confront me about it.
My nerves started to catch up with me as the first day approached. With his refreshed ambivalence I started to question if I could actually hold a candle to the potential skills of my classmates. In my class there would be talented people like Todoroki Shouto. I back flipped between being happy with the progress I was making and questioning if I'd really be able to compete.
Yuta appeared exasperated when I explained my doubts to him. He crossed his arms, shaking his head like I was an idiot.
"Yume, you'll be fine. You have to remember that Shouto-kun is probably one of the best heroics students of our generation. You don't have to compare yourself to him... or anyone for that matter! And besides, I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit," Yuta said when I explained my anxiety to him.
"... It's just my quirk is limited, Yuta. With Shouto-kun also being a fire quirk user I think it's inevitable I'm going to end up in his shadow," I say, staring at my hands. They were calloused from all my recent training. Yuta took them in his own hands.
"Who cares what anyone thinks about your quirk. Besides your quirk is completely different to his," Yuta said. I scoffed in response. What the hell does he mean? We both have fire quirks.
"I'm being serious! Sure, he also has a fire quirk but you have detailed control. Last I heard Shouto doesn't. I'm sure there are things you can do that he can't. You really shouldn't compare yourself," Yuta implored. I gave him a small smile. He's always cheering me on.
The first day of the semester finally arrives. I groggily sit up in my bed, turning off my phone alarm. My head felt heavy. I hardly slept the night before. The feelings of anxiety and excitement that had rippled within me the night before began to reemerge. I took a few slow and steady breaths before pushing myself up out of bed.
I ate silently with Yuta letting my mind race. Our father had already gone to work for the day with no acknowledgment of it being my first day at UA. No surprises there. I washed up and put on my school uniform. I stared at my reflection in the bathroom for several moments, taking in my appearance. I looked the part of a hero student that's for sure. Only time would tell if I could actually act it out.
Yuta hugged me on my way out the front door. I had a bit more of a distance to cover than he did to school so I left before him.
"Good luck, Yume," he said. His eyes shimmered causing me to smile. He had always been the softer of the two of us.
"Thanks, Yuta," I replied, pulling back. I patted him on the shoulder as I passed him out the door.
I take the train to school. Among the crowd in the train, I let my mind wonder. I think about what my classmates will be like. I think back to the explosive guy I encountered in my exam. If they're people like him I might be out of luck. I hope he's not in my class.
The train soon arrives at the schools station and I squeeze my way off. Scattered around I see other UA students in the crowds entering and exiting the station. I follow them the way to the school. Eventually I reach the gates. I look up at the tall buildings as my nerves clench my heart. This was it, my first day.
I take a deep breath and enter the gates. I scan the crowds, looking for any familiar faces. Up ahead I see a familiar dual coloured boy in the distance. That's Todoroki Shouto, right? It had been a while since I'd seen him. He was taller but there was no doubting that red and white hair was his.
"Yo, Shouto-kun!" I call out. He stopped, turning to see who it was that had called for his attention. He watched me blankly as I approached.
"... Yume-chan?" he said. He sounded unsure. I suppose outside a few brief encounters it had been several years since we'd seen each other. This in itself is honestly surprising. Last I heard we didn't actually live that far away from each other. My father had always wanted to be nearby to Endeavour for in case they needed to reconvene for any urgent missions. I jogged, catching up to him and falling into stride.
"It's been a while. How have you been?" I ask. I study his appearance. He still has some semblance of baby face but I could tell his features were beginning to become slightly more angular. His scar still stood out prominently against his pale skin but overall he was a handsome guy.
"... Fine," he says simply. An awkward silence falls between us. I look away from him, hiding my smile. Sure, his appearance may have changed a bit but it it seems he is still short on words. I think back to when we were kids. If I remember things accurately it was me, Fuyumi and his brother Natsuo who did most of the talking back when we were young. Shouto and Yuta would often quietly go along with whatever we were doing or talking about.
I had liked him. Although he was distant and aloof, he was also patient. He was generally a kind person, especially to Yuta who had sensitive personality. Perhaps it was due to their similar situations but they did seem to have a good understanding of each other. I had appreciated that about him.
"I ran into Endeavour not that long ago. He mentioned you're in 1A as well?" I ask, turning back to look at him. I watched his expression sour briefly.
"Yeah," he replied. I studied the reaction. The mild displeasure that had momentarily shown on his face was telling.
"From your expression I assume he's still just as much of an asshole as he was years ago?" I jeered. We turned a corner through the hallway. Shouto didn't respond to my question. Instead he turned to face away from me. I looked ahead. Coming up I could see a large sign with '1A' printed on it. I guess that was our classroom.
"I'll take your silence as a 'yes'. Don't worry, I get it. I won't mention him again," I say, shrugging. Shouto turned back to glance at me briefly.
"Thank you," he said. We reached the door. It was huge. Shouto slid it open gently and stepped in. I wasn't far behind him. There were a few students already inside. They looked up at us as we entered. There were certainly a few interesting looking individuals. Again, I looked around for any familiar faces from the exams but saw no one I recognised.
Shouto made a beeline for a seat at the back. I followed him, taking the desk next to him. I hung my bag on the hook on the side and I slid into my seat while Shouto also settled. I noticed him looking at me. He opened his mouth as if he was about to say something but quickly closed it, apparently deciding not to speak after all.
"Any idea who our teacher is?" I asked him quietly, breaking the silence between us. A few of the students were also murmuring to each other.
"Aizawa Shouta... His hero name is Eraser Head," he replied softly. I furrowed my eyebrows.
"Ehh. Never heard of him," I replied. I leaned forward on my seat, resting my face in the palm of my hand as I balanced my elbow on the desk in front of me. Shouto kept his mouth shut. Damn he's difficult to have a conversation with. For all his power, Shouto was demonstrating that he was still unequivocally socially inept. I guess some things don't change.
"Ah, Yume-chan... there's something I want to get out of the way..." he started after sometime. He was suddenly interrupted though when the door to the room slammed open. My eyes widened as the familiar blonde spiky hair of the boy with the explosion quirk from the exam swaggered in.
"Ah shit..." I murmured. I slid back lowly into my seat hoping that the boy wouldn't notice me. Shouto looked between me and our new classmate curiously.
Our explosive classmate's eyes scanned the room, looking at each of our classmates. They landed on me. I felt a shiver run down my spine as he glared at me. To my surprise though, he only looked at me. He plopped down into a seat a few places away diagonally from me. I raised my eyebrows. After the way he acted at the exam I was sure he was going to confront me.
I looked back to Shouto who had since stopped paying attention to our classmate.
"Before we got distracted, were you going to say something?" I ask him. He shifts slightly in his seat.
"It's nothing," he replied. I can't quite read his expression. I'm curious but decide to let it go.
"Sure," I reply, not pushing for an explanation.
In the lead up to class starting the explosive boy is confronted by a taller, stiff looking boy who gestured robotically at him. The boy, whose name I learnt to be Bakugo Katsuki, had his feet up on the desk. This apparently greatly offended the taller boy, Iida Tenya. It seemed we would have some big, clashing personalities in this class.
Shouto and I sat in silence as the room filled up with the members of our class. One of the last people to enter was a meek looking green haired boy and a girl with a cute round face. I watched them curiously. There were definitely some strong looking people in our class but on the other hand those two didn't look that intimidating at all. Then again, you can't always judge someone by their appearance. For all I know they could posses some crazy overpowered quirks.
I watched the green haired boy blush as he talked with the girl. Iida paced over to them to introduce himself, leaving Bakugo fuming.
"If you're here to make friends get out," a drawl is heard from the hallway. From my seat I peer through the doorway to a orange oblong laying in the doorway. Is that a sleeping bag? I watched curiously as the zipper is undone. A disheveled man slides out. The group near the doorway watch bewildered as he emerges.
"It took you eight seconds to shut up. You lack common sense," he says. Myself along with the class watch as he approaches the front of the classroom. Iida and the other students at the door make their way to their seats.
"I'm your homeroom teacher Aizawa Shouta. Nice to meet you," he says. This is Aizawa? What an eccentric looking man. He definitely doesn't look familiar. Shouto said he was a pro-hero. It's hard to believe though from looking at him. Aizawa rummages in his sleeping bag, pulling out a sports uniform.
"You each have one of these, correct? Get changed immediately and meet me outside," he drawled. The class resonates with confused 'okay's. That means theirs no orientation I suppose.
We get changed as instructed and head out to the school grounds. I see Shouto and meet him at his side, offering him a small nod. Aizawa claps getting the classes attention.
"Now that we're all here lets get started. We're doing a quirk apprehension test," he explains. We listen carefully.
Aizawa goes onto explain that it will be much like our middle school fitness tests with six standard test. Things like the softball throw and the 50 meter dash.
"Bakugo-kun, how far could you throw a softball in middle school," Aizawa asks.
"67 meters," Bakugo replies. That's impressive. What was mine? 43 meters?
Aizawa tosses him the softball.
"This time, try using your quirk. I don't care what you do so long as you don't leave the circle," Aizawa instructs. Bakugo grins almost maliciously as he steps up to the softball circle. He rotates his shoulders, warming up for the throw.
He throws the ball, following it with a large explosion. I feel the ignition in the air. The shock wave hits us.
"Incredible," I murmur. During the exam I didn't give it much thought but now that I have the time to properly take in his quirk I can see that his combustion ability is crazy. It was incredibly efficient for it's power. What is he using as his fuel?
"705.2 meters," Aizawa reports. The class stirs. It's an amazing result.
"This is going to be so much fun!" I hear one girl say. Aizawa frowns.
"Fun you say? You're planning to have a good time becoming heroes? How about this then... The person who comes last in today's tests will be expelled," he says. I feel my stomach drop.
"That's kind of harsh, isn't it?" I speak up. A few murmurs of agreement are heard.
"Natural disasters, villains and other calamities happen everyday. The modern day is filled with 'harsh' events and its the job of heroes to overcome them. Prove that you can overcome this 'harsh' test if you want to become a hero," Aizawa commands. I shut my mouth.
Anxiety ripples through my body. The last thing I want is to be expelled. Will I stand a chance? I feel my heart race. I breath slowly to calm myself. It'll be fine, right? I just have to not come last.
We're ushered off into groups for the events. First up is the 50 meter dash. I'm separated from Shouto who competes with his ice quirk. I note that his control has improved over the years since I last saw him.
Soon it's my turn. To my dismay I get grouped with Bakugo and the green haired boy whose name I learnt to be Midoriya. Judging by the way the two interacted it seemed they knew each other, however, they did not seem to like each other. Bakugo was openly hostile. In the meantime I feel myself begin to panic. If I wanted to do well I needed a fire started.
I knew I could grab one from Bakugo when the race started but it would be wasting time. Not to mention with Midoriya here as well it could be dangerous if I bring in a stream of fire between us. I need to get a flame started before the test starts. I look for Shouto... I could get one from him but he's nowhere nearby. This leaves Bakugo as my only option.
I take a deep breath and recite silently to myself 'be confident, be efficient, be effective'. I need to be able to do this. I just need to convince the hostile boy to give me a spark.
"Hey Bakugo-kun, give me a spark?" I ask the the explosive boy outright, hoping he agrees without opposition. He looks at me with confused rage.
"Huh?!" he exclaims. I roll my eyes. It was worth a try but I expected it wouldn't be that easy.
"Come on, dude. I can't start my own flames. I just need a little one," I explain. He watches me with wordless anger. He doesn't make a move to do so.
"... wait... You're that bitch from the exam!" he shouts. I stare at him incredulously. Midoriya watches on uncomfortably. It seems he's not fond of Bakugo's aggression.
"Are you for real? Did you just realise that now?" I ask. No wonder he didn't immediately blow up at me in the classroom earlier. He didn't even recognise me.
"I don't remember extras," he cut back. The race is starting soon. I need that spark if I want to get a good time. A potentially dangerous idea springs to mind.
"Pfft whatever. Why don't you prove that. Give me a spark and we'll see just who the 'extra' is," I reply with false confidence. I'm baiting him. In our brief encounter at the exam I'm sure he's stronger than me, he doesn't need to prove that to me. I don't care for beating him but I don't want to get expelled, even I have to use a dirty tactic to do so.
Bakugo grits his teeth. My bait seems to have worked though. Small sparks crackle at his palms. I catch one, pulling a flame behind me. I smile warmly at him which seems to enrage him further.
"Thanks, Bakugo-kun!" I say. We're instructed to get into our starting positions.
I think about my technique. Online I've seen heaps of examples of fire quirk users increasing their speed. It's all about the frequency, strength and position of combustion.
I crouch down into a starting position. I side eye Bakugo and Midoriya. Midoriya is in the middle of us. I'm conscious I might need to redirect some of mine and Bakugo's power away from him to stop him from getting burnt. That's fine. I can multitask. I take a deep breath, building up my alkane gas behind me.
The gun fires. Bakugo explodes off in front of us. I follow a short distance behind. I manage the air around Midoriya, stopping the brunt of the flames from hitting him as we fire off.
I slide past the finish line behind Bakugo with a time of 5.42. Although unrefined, being so close to Bakugo's explosions confirms once again just how much more efficient they are compared to my flames. I've read about the impact different fuels have on explosions and combustion. His are optimal for this type of race. If he refines that action he'll be a real monster one day. I keep a small flame spinning behind me for later.
"What'd'ya say about that extra?" Bakugo shouts. Although the question had been directed at me, I don't miss that he's side eyeing Midoryia to learn his time in the race. Those two definitely had a history.
"You sure showed me," I reply sarcastically, more amused than offended. He pushes past me towards the group to get ready for the next test. Midoriya and I follow a short distance behind him.
"Hey Bakugo-kun," I say, trying to get his attention.
"What?" he replies curtly.
"I'm curious. What's your fuel?" I ask, catching up to his side.
"Huh?!" he replies harshly. Geez, this guy has a terrible personality. It was a simple question.
"How do you make your explosions? My quirk lets me feel ignitions in the atmosphere. Your explosions are really efficient and I'm curious how you make them," I explain, pandering to his apparently oversized ego. He considers the question for a few moments, seemingly trying to decide whether or not to tell me.
"Nitroglycerin," he offers finally. We reach the group. I spot Shouto towards the back.
"Lucky. It's really concentrated. I have a complex alkane gas as mine. It's not bad but doesn't have the same power," I explain to Bakugo.
"... whatever," he replies. I study his expression. It really does seem like he doesn't care.
"Anyway, thanks for the spark. Catch you later," I say. I hear him 'tch'. I head back over to Shouto.
The remaining tests are rigorous but overall, I feel I did adequately. During the gaps between tests I hang around Shouto who seemed to tolerate my presence more than anything. He honestly looked uncomfortable. What is his problem?
Shouto performs exceptionally as I expected. I did notice, however, that he didn't once use his fire side.
The tests finish and we gather around Aizawa and a screen for the results. I feel my heart flutter. I feel like I did well enough but it didn't stop the nerves completely. Someone's going to get expelled and I really hope it's not me.
"It's time to present the results," he says. He clicked a button, bringing up the results on the screen. I let go of a breath I'd been holding. 11th... I got 11th. I let out a quiet dry laugh. I had done inexplicably average.
I feel tears unexpectedly prickle at my eyes. I bring my sleeve to my eyes. Perhaps for some people like Shouto or Bakugo, this would be a disappointing result but for me, this is proof I can compete in this arena of heroes. Even after passing the entrance exams I had doubts... what if my entry was just good luck? But even here today, among these varied tests I proved that I'm a legitimate contender. Slowly but surely I was proving that my father was wrong about my abilities. It seemed I was still proving this to myself as well.
I look up, having regained my composure to see Shouto watching me. His expression is unreadable to me. I flash him a grin.
"You came second Shouto-kun. Not that it's a surprise. You're really amazing," I say. He looks away, clearly uncomfortable.
"... By the way, I was lying about the expulsion," Aizawa says. I look back to the scoreboard. Who'd come last? I read Midoriya's name. He's the kid I ran with in the first race... the one who knows Bakugo. His expression is of relief and determination. I smile. He's got a long way to go but from his face he seems to have the right attitude.
The rest of the day flies by. Eventually the last bell rings and we're dismissed from class. Shouto stands up abruptly next to me and heads out to leave. I quickly pack up my stuff and swing my backpack over my shoulders.
"What an exhausting day, right? Aizawa-sensei sure doesn't hold back," I say, following Shouto out of the classroom. He looks away. Honestly, the whole day he's been uncommunicative. I had a feeling there was something he was holding back.
I let out an exasperated sigh.
"Ah geez, Shouto-kun. Spit it out already. What is it you want to say?" I ask him. He looks at me wide eyed.
"You've been holding back all day. I know you're a quiet guy but you're actually kind of freaking me out a bit. Just tell me what's on your mind," I prompt him again. Shouto's posture shifts.
"Yume-chan... it's nothing against you but I don't have any intention of making friends... with you or anyone. I just want to focus on becoming a hero," he says finally. I was taken aback. I feel a twinge inside my chest.
I slowly feel heat rise to my face. So this is why he's been quiet all day? It hadn't occurred to me that Shouto would feel like this. Given our history, I had thought if anything we'd be natural friends. I found myself embarrassed for having assumed so.
"A-ah. I see. I bet you have some significant ambitions," I reply. I look away from him to try to hide my face.
"Yes. Thank you for understanding," he replied. My feelings seemed to fly over his head.
"All good," I say softly.
We exit the school separately. As I made my way home a I felt a cycle of emotions. I was angry at Shouto and I felt ashamed. He said he wanted to focus on becoming a hero but why did that mean he couldn't have friends? What is wrong with companionship?
...
Why is it I'm not good enough?